JustPastSane
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Joined 04-14-08, id: 1551712, Profile Updated: 09-02-11
Author has written 4 stories for Twilight, and Vampire Kisses.

Hey Cyber world! This is Melissa and here's a little bit about myself:

I love to read and write, I LOVE VAMPIRES (haha) Edward Cullen is my fantasy, and i like pickles.

OK sooo my first story ever published in FanFiction is Truth or Dare with the Cullens. I wanna thank the people from 2 years ago that are still reading my story -wipes tear-. :D

Bands: Paramore, Eyes Set to Kill, Escape the Fate, NeverShoutNever!, Blood on the Dance Floor, Attack Attack!, Mayday Parade, The Devil Wears Prada, Bring Me the Horizon, Millionaires, Meg and Dia, Adele, and the list goes on.

Random things about me!: I'm random yay! I like purple! Im TEAM SWITZERLAND! I will always choose Damon over Stefan. I think Taylor Lautner is to sexy for anyone. I hate the color pink but my room IS pink. I think thinking is overrated. ._.

Messages to the world:

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

VVVVV

98 of teenagers do drugs, and drink alcohol...Put this in your profile if you like bagels.

My knight in shining amour turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

The road to success is always under construction.

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.

Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement.

Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

No I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me.

I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide.

You Know You're an author when...

You talk to yourself a lot.

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someones liver?')

After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, 'Holy crap, this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Sticks off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101. C:

(copy that into you're profile (and highlight the ones you fit) if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

I LOVE EDJAKEMBRY!

«´¨• тωιℓιgнт •´¨» ´•.¸(•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´
«´¨• ηєω мσση •´¨» ´•.¸(•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´
«´¨• є¢ℓιρѕє •´¨» ´•.¸(•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´
«´¨•вяєαкιηg ∂αωη•´¨» ´•.¸(•.¸ ¸.•´)¸.•´
«´¨•мι∂ηιgнт ѕυη•´¨»
¸.•(¸.•´ •.¸)•.¸

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Never Say Never by hersheycuddles reviews
The Cullens have decided to play a game of "Do what you would never do". Tensions flare, laughter erupts, and entertainment is a guarentee. Also, Reneesme has something dark and dirty up her sleeve oo I rhymed! :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 31,542 - Reviews: 257 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 11/20/2011 - Published: 12/29/2009
Fighting Temptation by Dobber17 reviews
Classmates Bella, Edward, Mike, and Tyler are invited to a basketball clinic in Seattle for 2 weeks. Bella is sharing a hotel room with the guys. What happens? Truth or dare, streaking, injuries, jealousy, and a growing attraction between Edward and Bella. AH.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 73,441 - Reviews: 3256 - Favs: 2,062 - Follows: 1,250 - Updated: 4/29/2011 - Published: 3/14/2008 - Complete
Hate Me by xrxdanixrx reviews
Awkward Bella only had a crush on one guy, known for stringing girls along. When he rejected Bella's advances, her world flipped inside out. Years later, she's now the female version of the catalyst that changed her life. And it's her turn for payback. AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 183,090 - Reviews: 2347 - Favs: 2,764 - Follows: 1,268 - Updated: 9/23/2010 - Published: 2/10/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bad Fauxmance by stella luna sky reviews
Typical formula: boy meets girl. Boy befriends girl. Boy falls in love with girl. Girl has no idea. Boy is afraid to tell her, because Boy - me, Edward Cullen - has been pretending to be gay to keep Girl's man-hating self in his life. AH/M. COMPLETE.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 40,411 - Reviews: 4158 - Favs: 3,502 - Follows: 2,414 - Updated: 8/31/2010 - Published: 2/20/2010 - Complete
My New Best Friend by Zosie reviews
Edward, Jasper and Emmett hit on a plan to get free rent on an apartment in college, two of them just have to appear to be a gay couple. And Bella Swan adores her new best friend, the so called gay Edward Cullen. Lemons E&B No slash, but inferred . M
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 60,082 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 364 - Follows: 146 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 5/18/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
What Women Want by screwthevolturiimgoinghome reviews
Something strange happens to playboy Edward Cullen when he begins writing a weekly column for his Moms magazine. Can't summarise to save my life. Just read. E/B AH OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,988 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 4/11/2010 - Published: 2/23/2010 - Edward, Bella
Detention by Sorark reviews
Mr. Cullen this is Miss. Swan. Isabella meet your very own personal slave, Edward Cullen. He will be doing anything you want him to for the next three weeks, so use him wisely." EPOV Please R&R. M for a reason. Mike OOC and Bella kind of but not really.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,077 - Reviews: 166 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 4/4/2010 - Published: 7/22/2008 - Edward, Bella
Why Do Good Girls Like Bad Boys? by BloodsuckingLeech reviews
Bella,Alice & Rosalie are violent, moody, bad girl best friends in a punk band called "Royally Screwed." Edward,Jasper & Emmett are the new bad boys in school. When they meet, Forks High becomes their battle ground. AU-some human, some not. R&R !
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 33 - Words: 69,195 - Reviews: 1795 - Favs: 1,208 - Follows: 667 - Updated: 8/19/2009 - Published: 1/16/2008 - Bella, Edward
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Truth or Dare with the Cullens reviews
Bella and the Cullens are bored to death. Sooo they play truth or dare. What can go wrong right? The answer: EVERYTHING! Tutus, strippers, stalkers, homosexual Mike, and the panty lord! Now with werewolves, and group dares! Can't get any better right?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 40,229 - Reviews: 191 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 1/12/2011 - Published: 4/22/2008
Hanging By A Coffin Latch reviews
While at the Coffin Club, Raven and Alexander get attacked by none other than Jagger. As Raven tries to do all in her power to save Alexander, he has his own problems of himself. Story is better than summary. Read and Review! *ON HOLD*
Vampire Kisses - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,913 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/4/2010 - Published: 12/21/2009
Holy Cullen, I love Pebbles! reviews
What happens when Alice and Bella take notes during class? And why does everyone have pebbles? read and review! *ON HOLD*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,234 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 1/15/2010 - Published: 12/6/2009
Randomness Unite! reviews
A collection of one-shots, usually about Emmett and his randomness. Collaboration with LicoriceVan. *ON HOLD*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,472 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/21/2009 - Published: 12/17/2008
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