AkatsukiShadow
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Joined 05-16-08, id: 1578296, Profile Updated: 04-17-09
Author has written 4 stories for Naruto.

Name: AkatsukiShadow
Age: 15

If you have ever fallen up a flight of stairs, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, (actually I have) Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki (I do all the time!), WeaselChick, Celyna ( i fall up the steps to school every time i go up them... sadly...) EverD, (When I did it, my friends said I defied physics. I don't know why though...), Jenova Remnant (afterwards, my friends called the event the floor hug), DestinyGamer, Dawnstarshine (It made me cry), Hiei-Riku-RubedoFAN (Everyone was surprised that I didn’t fall unconscious from slamming my head against the wall), The Crazy Evil Minish Neko (Erk, evil stairs of DOOM! ...They hurt. --cough--), AkatsukiShadow(It took me almost five minutes to figure out what happened...)

If you have ever run through your house cackling evilly, because you had a box of your favorite cookies, copy this into your profile and add your name to the list. The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, AkatsukiShadow(The things I do on halloween...)

If you have ever spent more than six hours straight on the computer then copy and paste this into your profile, add your name to the list. PenginYasha, leafninja345435, Tsukiko The Librarian, Unluckykat13, The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, AkatsukiShadow

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, Larxene II, Dragons Ark, freakyanimegal456, Hiei-Riku-RubedoFAN, The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, AkatsukiShadow(My friends say I have no self preservasion...)

If Orochimaru creeps the shit out of you, copy and paste this onto your profile and add your name. Lily, The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, AkatsukiShadow

If you have ever stared at a computer screen for hours and hours reading stories that people who have no lives whatsoever and have enough obsession with something to write a story about it and you are one of those people, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Shifter-youkai, AkatsukiFan, WhiteWinged Alchemist, Yasu Uchiha (my obsession with Sasuke Uchiha will be FOREVER! XDD), ramenlover4 (I dislike Sasuke...), Gaara's_Pandachan101 (Gaara (drools)) Evilfangirl ( SASUKE! Gaara. Kakashi Itachi and Kisame), Mood-chan-SIRIUS IS UBER HOT (Akatsuki Rocks! Especially Deidara!), The Crazy Evil Minish Neko (Akatsuki equals love XD), AkatsukiShadow (Akatsuki is awesome. I'm officially obsessed.)

Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you start having the Akatsuki follow you around and comment on what you're doing. Crazy is when you begin laughing as you're drawing a picture, and it's what you're laughing at. Crazy is when... Oo! Shiny! (So true... sad to say almost all this applies to me)

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, Battleground Heart, Kaity the Chameleon, xX-Arianna-hime-Xx,Seppaku, Amanemanga, The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, AkatsukiShadow

The Many Rules of Coffee

1) Thou shalt not sneeze while carrying said drink

2) Especially if it's hot

3)Thou shalt not sneeze in said drink

4) Thou shalt respect the hot coffee pot

5) Thou shalt not pour said drink onto hand

6) The above applies to the feet, eyes, nose, and any other body part, other than the mouth

7) Thou shalt not pour said drink over the head of an animal

8) Same goes for the rest of the animal

9) Thou shalt keep your complaints about the drink to yourself

10) If you have any complaints, thou shalt make it yourself

11) Thou shalt mix it with milk and sugar, and give it to a younger sibling if they 'want some, too'

12) Thou shalt copy and past this into your profile, adding more rules of coffee and placing this part at the end, while adding your pen name to the list, and any of the rules you added (numbers)

13. Thou shalt not replace the sugar with salt for when thy parents make coffee

14. Thou shalt not drink two pots of coffee in two hours, for thou will get very jittery then very tired and feel quite strange

The Crazy Evil Minish Neko (I put 1 through 11, and obviously the one that was originally 12 (telling you to copy and paste)), AkatsukiShadow (13 and 14)

You know you live in 2007 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don’t have a screen name or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

Anime Laws:

Rule #1 for Anime: Women hit harder than villains.

Rule #2 for Anime: You can cuss someone out to the darkest depths of hell and actually get rewarded for it.

Rule #3 for Anime: The homework always gets done even when you haven't touched it for weeks.

Rule #4 for Anime: Girls with sweet dispositions and innocent faces are the MOST dangerous fighters you can find. STAY CLEAR!

Rule #5 for Anime: Even the stupidest person in the class will graduate with flying colors even though they showed NO sign of improvement.

Rule #6 for Anime: Every anime-yes EVERY anime-has its slut. Learn to deal with it.

Amusing one self in an elevator:

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"

2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."

14) WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"

18) DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.

22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

Things to amuse yourself by doing:

1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. see if they slow down.

2) Page yourself over the intercom. don't disguise your voice.

3) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In"

5) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6) In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors"

7) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy"

8) Dont use any punctuation

9) As often as possible, skip rather than walk
.

10) Ask people what sex they are. laugh hysterically after they answer.

11) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go"

12) Sing along at the opera.

13) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme
.

14) Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day
.

15) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because your not in the mood.

16) Have you co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.

17) WHEN THE MONEY COMES OUT OF THE ATM, SCREAM "I WON! I WON!"

18) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives! they're loose!"

19) Tell your children over dinner, "due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

20) Send this e-mail to someone to make them smile. it's called therapy.

DON'T DO IT;

I went to a birthday party,

And remembered what you said.

You told me not to drink at all,

So I had a Sprite instead.

I felt proud of myself,

The way you said I would,

That I didn't choose to drink and drive,

Though some friends said I should.

I knew I made a healthy choice and,

Your advice to me was right,

As the party finally ended,

And the kids drove out of sight.

I got into my own car,

Sure to get home in one piece,

Never knowing what was coming,

Something I expected least.

Now I'm lying on the pavement,

And I hear the policeman say,

"The kid that caused this wreck was drunk."

His voice seems far away.

My own blood is all around me,

As I try hard not to cry.

I can hear the paramedic say,

"This girl is going to die."

I'm sure the guy had no idea,

While he was flying high,

Because he chose to drink and drive,

That I would have to die.

So why do people do it,

Knowing that it ruins lives?

But now the pain is cutting me,

Like a hundred stabbing knives.

Tell sister not to be afraid, Mom

Tell daddy to be brave,

And when I go to heaven,

Put "Daddy's Girl" on my grave.

Someone should have taught him,

That it's wrong to drink and drive.

Maybe if his mom and dad had,

I'd still be alive.

My breath is getting shorter,

I'm getting really scared.

These are my final moments,

And I'm so unprepared.

I wish that you could hold me Mom,

As I lie here and die.

I wish that I could say,

I love you and good-bye.

DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE!

If you too are against drunk driving, add this to your profile and add your name to the bottom. ~NoOnesGal1848, Sakura-Cherry-Blossom-Chan, AkatsukiDreamer, DeiDei-kunsgirl, purplenekomata, The Crazy Evil Minish Neko, AkatsukiShadow,

THE NARUTARD SURVEY! NARUTARDS UNITE!

1. Who is your favorite Naruto character(s)?

Akatsuki, Naruto-chan, Kiba-kun, Gaara-sama, Tsunade-sama, Shika-kun, Tenten-chan, Neji-kun, and a few more.

2. What is your favorite pairing(s)?

SasoDei, KakuHidan, PeinKonan, KisaIta, ItaNaru, SasuNaru, ItaFemNaru, SasuFemNaru, KibaNaru, KibaHina, NejiTen, and a few others...

3. Are you a Naruto yaoi or hentai fan?

I do like Yaoi.

4. Ever cosplayed Naruto characters? If so, who, where and how many times?

Cosplaying Deidara for the first time in October... cosplayed as a random sand ninja at halloween...

5. List your collection of Naruto junk and merchandise, if any.

Leaf Headband, Sand Headband, Sand ninja fingerless gloves, shuriken, a few other things...

6. Have you ever felt that you were destined to be with a Naruto character? If so, who?

...Not really...

7. NaruHina or KibaHina?

KibaHina

8. SasuSaku or SasuNaru?

SasuNaru!

9. Which team is your favorite?

Either the sand siblings or team gai!

10. Do you support the obito theory? (Tobi=Obito)

Yes.

11. Do you support the 'Yondaime is Naruto's father' theory?

Yes.

12. Your favorite Akatsuki member?

Either Deidara, Hidan, or Sasori.

13. Are you Pro-Sasuke or Anti-Sasuke?

Depends.

14. Have you seen all Naruto episodes so far (including Shippuden and fillers)?

Yes. Yes yes yes/

15. Have you read all the chapters so far?

Not yet, trying to find the rest.

16. Do you believe Naruto has ADD?

No, just hyper... like my friend is.

17. Sub or dub?

Sub.

18. Pro-Sakura or Anti-Sakura?

Depends. Was Anti at first, now I'm sort of Pro that she's changed from fangirl to serious kunoichi.

19. Tobi = Annoying or funny?

Funny! Love him! He's like Akatsuki Comic Relief.

20. Do you even know who Tobi is?

Yes

21. Gai = Sexy beast or Ugly nerd?

Not a nerd, not a sexy beast.

22. Which character would be the best crossdresser?

Haku, hands down.

23. Rock Lee = Weird or Awesome?

Both/

24. Which character would be best OOC? Who and how?

Sasuke. Sasuke and Itachi, definantly. Just, not being all emotionless and serious all the time, making a few jokes.

25. Do you like Naruto fanfics?

Yes. I do.

26. Do you wirte Naruto fanfics?

Yes, I do write Naruto fanfics.

27. Do you like lemons?

YES, Especially Yaoi. x3

28. Do your parents know about the Naruto characters?

No, even if they see me watching/reading it all the time... and hear me speaking about it with my friends.

29. Have you watched the Naruto Abridged Series?

Huh?

30. Have you seen The Naruto Ultimate Fanflashes?

Yes, I have.

31. Have you ever gotten someone else hooked on Naruto?

Kinda. She likes it but isn't exactly hooked... I'm still working on that.

32. Have you ever been drawing Naruto in school and has someone recognized it?

Yes.

33. Have you ever been in class drawing Naruto and the teacher came up to you and said 'WTF is this?'

Yes. It was Naruto and Kyuubi in Geometry class. He didn't say the exact words, though.

34. Has Naruto affected your school life and grades?

No, it hsan't. At all.

35. Are you broke thanks to Naruto?

No.

36. Do you want to read Icha Icha Paradise?

Definant NO.

37. Do you support the 'Yondaime is the Akatsuki Leader' theory?

No! I don't! Yondaime is dead. Pein is Leader-sama.

38. Do you draw Naruto fanart? If so, count how many there are in your gallery.

Yes, though I have never put any online.

39. Is Sasuke still sexy in his second stage of the cursed seal?

Say what? Creepy...

40. Do you have a Naruto OC?

Not human OCs, and only in one of my stories.

41. Looking back at some of your answers, do you think Naruto has taken over your life?

No, it hasn't.

Copy paste things:

If you have ever mistaken a stick for a snake, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever gotten a lock (like one on a locker) and put it on something, then forgot the combination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the hell of it, copy and paste this into your profil

If you think that if girl ruled the world, then it would be a better place, copy this into your profile

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you frickin' COULD, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever laughed maniacally, choked and/or gagged from lack of oxygen, and then fainted dramatically, copy and paste this onto your profile (All except fainting)

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile! If you have ever run into a wall, copy this on your profile! If you've ever fallen UP stairs, copy this on your profile! If you've ever forgotten to breathe...you know what to do.

If you've ever copied something from someone else's profile, copy this onto your profile! (Wtf?)

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile.

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!

If you are against real fur on clothing then put this on your profile.

If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile XD

If you think that being unique is better than being cool, then put this on your profile

If you've ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile.

If you have ever want to scream to the world that you hate/like someone copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away and remembered copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been watching a T.V show, and when the commercials came on you forgot what you were watching copy this into your profile.

If you have ever had a random song pop into your head at the most completely and utter worst time but you sing it anyway copy this into your profile.

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever thrown something at your television when you saw a character you despise, wether it be a piece of popcorn, a fork, or a chair, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are obsessed with anime, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're obsessed with Fullmetal Alchemist or Naruto, copy and paste this into your profile

Copy and paste this in your profile if you are a Fanfiction addict.

If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination, copy and paste here.

If you have ever crashed into a wall while you were sugarhigh, copy onto profile

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have trouble making decisions, either copy and paste this into your profile or look up the word "floccinaucinihilipifilification" in the dictionary.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. (It has happened to me before)

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

Just because we eat animals for food doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc. copy this into your profile!

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you ever ran up the down escalator, copy this into your profile. (It's fun. Try it.)

If you've ever misspelled your own name, paste this on your profile.

If you've ever had to look at your own penname to write it in an email paste this in your profile.

If you've ever had to ask your best friend your OWN Phone/Cell Number to tell another Friend paste this in your profile.

If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile.

If you understand things that some adults older than you do not and they ignore you until you SHOW them what you know and you surprise them paste this in your profile.

55 percent of people yawn after seeing someone yawn, in fact, reading about yawning will make some people yawn. If, after or while reading this, you yawned, copy and paste this in your profile. If you like sitting on top of things because your vertically challenged copy and paste this into your profile!

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have broke out in tears for no reason, and then laughed while still crying copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you laugh secretly at some people or keep on comparing them with characters because they resemble some characters, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever busted a move/ burst into song, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever watch Naruto to see Sasuke get his rear end beat by Itachi paste this on your profile.

If you hug cute toys when no one's looking, paste this to your profile.

If YOU get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile. (Deidara and Mythbusters both... and a 4th of july party to always be remembered)

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever walked around out anywhere and started talking to yourself thus receiving strange looks from people paste this in your profile.

If you've ever bought a game because it had a freakin' awesome looking character paste this on your profile.

If you've ever read/watch/etc a book/manga/anime/movie/etc. so it would shut your friends up and then ended up liking it so much you got more into it than your friends and they wished they never told you about it paste this into your profile.

If you like/love copying and pasting stuff into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills regularly, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is where you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favourite song plays. Crazy is where you do or say a totally random thing, like 'do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?' or start having a thumb war with yourself (I find I am a tough opponent). So if your crazy copy this onto your profile.

If you have never been in the cursed store known as Abrecrombie and Fitch, copy and paste this into your profile

I've stopped listening, why haven't you stopped talking? - If you have ever thought and/or said this, copy and paste this into your profile... NOW!

Foolish little brother... Why are you so weak? Because you lack... Hatred - Itachi, if you have ever thought said and/or exclaimed this sentence copy and paste this into your profile.

Many writers don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're'. If you do understand it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know our society is moving in the wrong direction, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't do drugs (They are nasty!), copy and paste this into your profile.

If sometimes your fanfics seem to write themselves, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like to read what people put in the ir profiles, and you like 'Copy&Paste' stuff, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever wanted to SLAP someone copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever wondered why Bush won't leave the friggin' war and let the remaining soldiers live, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think iPods were gifts from the Goddesses, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you wish Sheik and Zelda were not the same person, and that Sheik would bitch slap her, copy and paste this into your profile to help Sheik gain his own world domination. Signed; Sheik fangirls world wide

If you believe that is was Uchiha Madara who originally said 'It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye; then it's keep away!' copy and paste this into your profile (It makes sense!)

Quotes I like:

-A good friend will bail you out of jail, a true friend will be sitting next to you, saying "Damn that was fun!"-

-A good friend will care for you when you're hurt, a true friend will be sitting next to you, laughing their asses off.-

-Any conditioned cat-hater can be won over by any cat who chooses to make the effort.-

-A cat is always there when you call her, unless she has something better to do.-

-As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows, cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human mind -

-A kitten is more amusing than half the people one is obliged to live with-

-A cat can be trusted to purr when she is pleased, which is more than can be said for human beings.-

-An ordinary kitten will ask more questions than any five year old.-

-A cat is the only domestic animal I know who toilet trains itself and does a damned impressive job of it-

-A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution-

-As we all know, cats now rule the world-

-A cat's got her own opinion of human beings. She doesn't say much, but you can tell enough to make you anxious not to hear the whole of it-

-Authors like cats because they are such quiet, lovable, wise creatures, and cats like authors for the same reasons.-

-A dog knows his master, a cat does not-

-A child is a person who can't understand why someone would give away a perfectly good kitten-

-After dark all cats are leopards-

-A cat has absolute emotional honesty. Human beings, for one reason or another, may hide their feelings, but a cat does not-

-A Cat's hearing apparatus is built to allow the human voice to easily go in one ear and out the other-

-As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.-

-A simple friend wonders about your romantic history, a real friend could blackmail you with it.-

-A simple friend doesn't know your parents' first names, a real friend has their phone numbers in their address book.-

-A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest, a real friend opens your refrigerator and helps themselves.-

-Anime, my anti-drug, because when you watch that much anime, how do you have time for drugs?.-

-An old Jew was refused service in a restaurant. "We don't serve Jews here," the waiter said. "Don't let that bother you," replied the old man. "I don't eat Jews!"- I think that was Bernard Baruch

-Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.-

-A weak mind isn't strong enough to hurt itself, stupidity has saved many a man from going mad.-

-A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.- Jerry Seinfeld

-Age is strictly a case of ming over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.- Jack Benny

-A true friend is someone who sees the pain in your eyes, while everyone else believes the smile on your face.-

-A stranger stabs you in the front. A friend stabs you in the back. A boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.-

-A wise man once said... Ask a girl.-

-Bare foot on the moon!- The Doctor, from Doctor Who.

-Beware of people who dislike cats.-

-By associating with the cat, one only risks becoming richer.-

-But why is the rum gone!- Captain Jack Sparrow, from Pirates of the Caribbean

-Because a man is unfaithful to you is no reason to leave him. You should stay with him and make sure the rest of his life is a living hell.- Roseanne Barr

-Boys are like slinkies; Useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.-

-Bad guy fall down and go BOOM?-

-Because Kira is an immature sore loser. Yes... Since I am also an immature sore loser...- L

-Curiosity killed the cat, and satisfaction brought it back.-

-Consistency requires you to be as ignorant today as you were a year ago.- Bernard Berenson,

-Crap! This just proves my theory that secretly, all women have the power to blow up the freaking world...- Hidan said that in one of the Naruto comics I read,

-Cats are a mysterious kind of folk.- Sir Walter Scott

-Cats are poetry in motion. Dogs are gibberish in neutral.-

-Cat: A pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs and patronizes human beings.-

-Cats are mysterious folk. There is more passing in their minds than we are aware of.-

-Cats are absolute individuals, with their own ideas about everything, including the people they own.-

-Cats sleep anywhere; any table, any chair, top of piano, window ledge, in the middle ... on the edge.-

-Cat: A lap warmer with a built-in buzzer-

-Cats always know whether people like or dislike them. They just don't care enough to do anything about it-

-Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.-

-Don't follow in my footsteps... I walk into walls.-

-Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there are footprints on the moon!- I have no idea who said this

-Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, because, to them, you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.-

-Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.-

-Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.-

-Dogs have owners, cats have staff-

-Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will piss on your computer.-

-Deep down, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them.-

-Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run - he hates that-

-Do me a favor and drop dead.-

-Don't lick ME!- Subaku no Gaara

-Don't steal from your mothers purse. (everyone knows Grandma has more money)-

-Don't look at me with that tone of voice!- O.o

- --in a sing song voice-- Deck the halls with gasoline... Light a match and watch it gleam.-

-Dragons like to make things go BOOM.-

-Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines!- Ita-kun is safe! Yay!

-Everyone I know is insane, including me! And me! And me!-

-Everyone hurts when they are rejected.- Mithos

-Every death leaves a scar, and every time a child laughed it starts healing.- Eli Weisel

-Everyone hears what you say. Friends listen to what you say. Best friends listen to what you don't say.-

-Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.-

-Even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: When fat, arrange yourself in slim poses.-

-Even the stupidest cat seems to know more than any dog.-

-Excuse me, have you seen my sanity? I think I lost it...-

-Forgive your enemies. It messes with their heads.-

-Friends will always be like. "Well, you deserve better." But best friends will be prank calling him, saying. "You will die in seven days."-

-From birth to age eighteen, a girl needs good parents, from eighteen to thirty-five, she needs good looks, from thirty-five to fifty-five, she needs a good personality, and from fifty-five on she needs good cash. I'm saving my money.- Sophie Tucker

-For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first be ignored by a cat.-

-Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.-

-God gave man the cat in order that he might have the pleasure of caressing a tiger.-

-Garfield's Law: Cats instinctively know the precise moment their owners will awaken, then they awaken them ten minutes sooner. - Jim Davis

-Go bang your head against the wall.-

-Giving up doesn't always mean you're weak. It just means that you are strong enough to let go.-

-Heaven doesn't want me there, and Hell knows I'll take over.-

-How many dodongos could a dead dodongo eat, if a dead dodongo could eat dodongos?-

-Hold on; my train of thought just hit a cow...-

-I don't think of myself as having split personalities - rather, I have unused brain space that's up for rent.-

-Insanity is a gift - don't squander it.-

-Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.-

-I haven't lost my mind; it's backed up on a disk somewhere.-

-In a dog-eat-dog world, the best thing to do is become a cat.-

-I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.-

-I gave my cat a bath the other day, they love it. He just sat there and enjoyed it. It was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that ..-

-Ignorant people think it's the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it’s the sickening grammar they use-

-It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens that, whatever you say to them, they always purr-

-If cats could talk, they wouldn't-

-If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend but never your slave-

-It's very hard to be polite if you're a cat.-

-I am as vigilant as a cat to steal cream.-

-I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul.-

-It is with the approach of winter that cats wear their richest fur and assume an air of sumptuous and delightful opulence.-

-If a cat spoke, it would say things like, "Hey, I don't see the problem here."-

-If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?-

-In ancient times, cats were worshipped as Gods; they have not forgotten this-

-I have noticed that what cats appreciate most in human beings is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted, but their entertainment value.-

-If a dog jumps into your lap it is because he is fond of you. If a cat does the same, it's because your lap is warmer.-

-If a cat did not put a firm paw down now and then, how could his human remain possessed.-

-In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.-

-If at first you don't succeed... Cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie- Naruto icon

-I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.- Woody Allen

-I don't believe in the afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.- Woody Allen

-I reject your reality and substitute my own!- Adam Savage from Mythbusters

-It is a sobering thought, that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.- Tom Lehrer

-It's so simple to be wise. Just think of some thing stupid to say and say the opposite.- Sam Levenson

-I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.- Bernard Baruch

-If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging!-

-It's a girls world and guys just live in it!-

-In a dog-eat-dog world, the best thing to do is become a cat.-

-I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.-

-I gave my cat a bath the other day, they love it. He just sat there and enjoyed it. It was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that ..-

-Ignorant people think it's the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it’s the sickening grammar they use-

-It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens that, whatever you say to them, they always purr-

-If cats could talk, they wouldn't-

-If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend but never your slave-

-It's very hard to be polite if you're a cat.-

-I am as vigilant as a cat to steal cream.-

-I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul.-

-It is with the approach of winter that cats wear their richest fur and assume an air of sumptuous and delightful opulence.-

-If a cat spoke, it would say things like, "Hey, I don't see the problem here."-

-If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?-

-In ancient times, cats were worshipped as Gods; they have not forgotten this-

-I have noticed that what cats appreciate most in human beings is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted, but their entertainment value.-

-If a dog jumps into your lap it is because he is fond of you. If a cat does the same, it's because your lap is warmer.-

-If a cat did not put a firm paw down now and then, how could his human remain possessed.-

-In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.-

-If at first you don't succeed... Cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie- Naruto icon

-I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.- Woody Allen

-I don't believe in the afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.- Woody Allen

-I reject your reality and substitute my own!- Adam Savage from Mythbusters

-It is a sobering thought, that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.- Tom Lehrer

-It's so simple to be wise. Just think of some thing stupid to say and say the opposite.- Sam Levenson

-I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.- Bernard Baruch

-If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging!-

-It's a girls world and guys just live in it!-

-In a dog-eat-dog world, the best thing to do is become a cat.-

-I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.-

-I gave my cat a bath the other day, they love it. He just sat there and enjoyed it. It was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that ..-

-Ignorant people think it's the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it’s the sickening grammar they use-

-It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens that, whatever you say to them, they always purr-

-If cats could talk, they wouldn't-

-If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend but never your slave-

-It's very hard to be polite if you're a cat.-

-I am as vigilant as a cat to steal cream.-

-I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul.-

-It is with the approach of winter that cats wear their richest fur and assume an air of sumptuous and delightful opulence.-

-If a cat spoke, it would say things like, "Hey, I don't see the problem here."-

-If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?-

-In ancient times, cats were worshipped as Gods; they have not forgotten this-

-I have noticed that what cats appreciate most in human beings is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted, but their entertainment value.-

-If a dog jumps into your lap it is because he is fond of you. If a cat does the same, it's because your lap is warmer.-

-If a cat did not put a firm paw down now and then, how could his human remain possessed.-

-In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.-

-If at first you don't succeed... Cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie- Naruto icon

-I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.- Woody Allen

-I don't believe in the afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.- Woody Allen

-I reject your reality and substitute my own!- Adam Savage from Mythbusters

-It is a sobering thought, that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.- Tom Lehrer

-It's so simple to be wise. Just think of some thing stupid to say and say the opposite.- Sam Levenson

-I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.- Bernard Baruch

-If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging!-

-It's a girls world and guys just live in it!-

-In a dog-eat-dog world, the best thing to do is become a cat.-

-I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.-

-I gave my cat a bath the other day, they love it. He just sat there and enjoyed it. It was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that ..-

-Ignorant people think it's the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it’s the sickening grammar they use-

-It is a very inconvenient habit of kittens that, whatever you say to them, they always purr-

-If cats could talk, they wouldn't-

-If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend but never your slave-

-It's very hard to be polite if you're a cat.-

-I am as vigilant as a cat to steal cream.-

-I love cats because I enjoy my home; and, little by little, they become its visible soul.-

-It is with the approach of winter that cats wear their richest fur and assume an air of sumptuous and delightful opulence.-

-If a cat spoke, it would say things like, "Hey, I don't see the problem here."-

-If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?-

-In ancient times, cats were worshipped as Gods; they have not forgotten this-

-I have noticed that what cats appreciate most in human beings is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted, but their entertainment value.-

-If a dog jumps into your lap it is because he is fond of you. If a cat does the same, it's because your lap is warmer.-

-If a cat did not put a firm paw down now and then, how could his human remain possessed.-

-In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats.-

-If at first you don't succeed... Cheat. Repeat until caught. Then lie- Naruto icon

-I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying.- Woody Allen

-I don't believe in the afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.- Woody Allen

-I reject your reality and substitute my own!- Adam Savage from Mythbusters

-It is a sobering thought, that when Mozart was my age he had been dead for two years.- Tom Lehrer

-It's so simple to be wise. Just think of some thing stupid to say and say the opposite.- Sam Levenson

-I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always fifteen years older than I am.- Bernard Baruch

-If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging!-

-It's a girls world and guys just live in it!-

-It's better to know how to learn than to learn how to know.- This, is why we shouldn't have to study...

-I'd like to say thanks, but... --looks down then back up-- I believe I may hate you.- Mike Rowe, from Dirty Jobs

-If opportunity doesn't knock, then build a door.-

-I want you all to kill each other until there's one left standing...- Kabuto

-If your wife is short, bend down and listen to her.- The Talmud

-If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.-

-I will temporarily rule the world, forever.-

-I'm not a complete idiot... Some parts are missing.-

-If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.-

-I never stopped loving you, I just stopped letting it show.-

-In life, there are three things that shouldn't ever be broken... Toys... Glass... and Lives.-

-If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile... But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me.-

-I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.-

-If all my friends were to jump off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them. I'd be waiting at the bottom to catch them.

-I defy you! Come and kneel before the Akatsuki!- Mood Tech Pshyco and Balance

-I'm here to fight for truth, justice, and... WHIPCREAM!-

-I'm smiling... That alone should scare you.-

-Jesus is coming... hide the porn!-

-Kami-sama created man first, 'cause you always make a rough draft before the masterpiece!- (Agreed.)

-Kittens are born with their eyes shut. They open them in about six days, take a look around, then close them again for the better part of their lives.-

-Kitten: A small homicidal muffin on legs; affects human sensibilities to the point of endowing the most wanton and ruthless acts of destruction with near-mythical overtones of cuteness. Not recommended for beginners. Get at least two-

-L, do you know, reapers only eat apples?- Kira notes

-Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.-

Life was never intended to be an individual adventure. You need a team to get through all of your worries and problems.-

-Last night I sent an angel to watch over you while you were sleeping. It came back early an I asked it why? It said "Angels don't watch other angels."-

-Manga, my anti-drug, because when you spend all your money on manga, how can you afford drugs?-

-My husband said it was either him or the cat. I miss him sometimes.-

-My cat does not talk as respectfully to me as I do to her.-

-Meow is like aloha, it can mean anything.-

-Most beds sleep up to six cats, ten without the owner.-

-My mind works like lightning... one brilliant flash and it's gone.-

-No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me.-

-One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.-

-One cat just leads to another-

-People who hate cats will come back as mice in their next life.-

-Purring would seem to be, in her case, an automatic safety-valve device for dealing with happiness overflow-

-Procrastinate NOW!-

-Reality is just a shared illusion.-

-The hidden is more interesting than the obvious.-

-There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.-

-When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.- Elayne Boosler

-What happens if you get scared half to death twice?- (Do we die?)

-There is, incidently, no way of talking about cats that enables one to come off as a sane person.-

-There are no ordinary cats-

-There are few things in life more heart warming than to be welcomed by a cat.-

-The phrase "domestic cat" is an oxymoron.-

-We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.-

-Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?- (It's fun to be impossible!)

-We humans are indeed fortunate if we happen to be chosen to be owned by a cat.-

-When addressed, a gentleman cat does not move a muscle. He looks as if he hasn't heard. - Mary Sarton

-When she walked, she stretched out long and thin like a little tiger, and held her head high to look over the grass as if she were treading the jungle.-

-When all else fails; Blow shit up.- (It's fun!)

-Wise is the male who does not piss off a woman.- The Evil Crazy Minish Neko

-Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.-

-When the mouse laughs at the cat, there is always a hole nearby.-

-We cannot, without becoming cats, perfectly understand the cat mind-

-When in danger, or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.-

-When it hurts to look back, and you're afraid to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there.-

-What shall we do? Kick him awake?-

-You should explode.-

-You laugh because I'm different, I laugh because you're all the same.-

-Your village called, their idiot is missing.-

-You're never too old to become younger.- Mea West

-You call me a b--, a b-- is a female dog, dogs bark, bark comes from trees, trees are nature, and nature is beautiful, so... thanks for the complement!-

-You may only be young once, but you can be immature forever!- (I still am! And I most likely will always be!)

-You're just jealous that the voices in my head aren't talking to you!-

-You want to know who your real friends are? Screw up and see who's still there-

-You can't own a cat. The best you can do is be partners-

-Your cat will never threaten your popularity by barking at three in the morning. He won't attack the mailman or eat the drapes. He may climb the drapes to see how the room looks from the ceiling.-

-You know what? Earth sucks! I'm going home.-

-What if it was cats who invented technology, would they have TV shows starring rubber sqeaky toys?-

-There is no more intrepid explorer than a kitten.-

-The cat who doesn't act finicky, soon loses control of his owner-

-The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.-

-The smallest feline is a masterpiece. - Leonardo de Vinci

-The only mystery about the cat is why it ever decided to become a domestic animal.-

-The smart cat doesn't let on that he is. -

-When someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown about it, but only 4 to extend your arm and punch the living shit out of 'em.- (True)

-What you see is what you get.-

-When life gives you lemons... squeeze them in life's eyes and laugh.-

-When life gives you lemons... make grape juice, and let people wonder how you did it.-

-When life gives you lemons... shut up and eat your damn lemons!-

-When life gives you lemons... throw them back, I don't want no damn lemons!-

-When life gives you lemons... share them with your friends.-

-When life gives you lemons... sell the lemons and buy candy with the money you make.-

-Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy? Take him into a round room and tell him to sit in a corner.-

-Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door.- (I tried it before)

-The more people I meet, the more I like my cat-

-To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction, and a cat. The last ingredient is usually hardest to come by.-

-The little furry buggers are just deep, deep wells you throw all your emotions into.-

-They say the test of literary power is whether a man can write an inscription. I say, "Can he name a kitten?"-

-The cat is the mirror of his human's mind. The dog is the mirror of his human's physical appearance-

-The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it-

-The cat is domestic only as far as suit its own ends.-

-The middle of a rainstorm is not the time to start fixing the hole in the roof.- Joseph Heller

-The only rational way of educating is to be an example of what to avoid, if one can't be the other sort.- Albert Einstein

-The problem with reality is the lack of background music-

-The whole motivation for any performer is "Look at me, Ma."- Lenny Bruce

-Tragedy is if I cut my finger. Comedy is if you walk into an open sewer and die.- Mel Brooks

-Remember that you are unique... just like everyone else.-

-Respect me... I have cookies.-

-Sure, dreams come true, but so do nightmares.-

-Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well.-

-There's a light at the end of every tunnel, just hope it's not a train.-

-Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.- Albert Einstein

-There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved by a suitable application of high explosives.- Unknown

Quotes from TV shows, movies, books, and fanfictions:

"This room would make liberache say 'step back nobody is THAT gay'"~ Gilmore Girls

"Oi with the poodles already"~ Gilmore Girls, Lorelai and Rory

LUKE: Taylor, you are asking me to donate free coffee to hundreds of people so you can raise money to buy a tarp.
TAYLOR: How about fifty cents a cup?
LUKE: How about I charge for cream?
TAYLOR: You would kick Tiny Tim’s crutch out from under him, wouldn’t you?
LUKE: If he asks for a free cup of coffee, gimpy’s going down. ~ Luke and Taylor from Gilmore Girls

GYPSY: You wanna kill the little romping Bambi’s?
TAYLOR: People, do I have to detail the problems that these deer cause?
LUKE: No, but you will.
TAYLOR: Lyme disease, auto accidents, plane accidents.
LUKE: We have flying deer?
MISS PATTY: Oh, that’s scary.
BABETTE: Yeah. Those ones you can snuff~ Gypsy, Taylor, Luke, Miss Patty, and Babette from Gilmore Girls

LORELAI: It was a slow dance — a waltz. Luke can waltz.
RORY: Luke can waltz?
LORELAI: Luke can waltz!
RORY: Look how you just said, “Luke can waltz.”
LORELAI: What? I’m just saying, I’m surprised that Luke can waltz.
RORY: That sounded more like, “I’m surprised I still have my clothes on.” ~ Rory and Lorelai in Gilmore Girls

RORY: Maybe you could come with me.
LORELAI: Oh, is there a “you’re crazy” team? ’Cause I think they’d make you captain.
RORY: Please?
LORELAI: Rory, I love you. I would take a bullet for you. But I’d rather stick something sharp in my ear than go to the club with you.
RORY: Fine.
LORELAI: I’d rather slide down a banister of razor blades and land in a pool of alcohol than go to the club with you.
RORY: I got it.
LORELAI: Don’t stop me, I’m on a roll. I’d rather eat my own hand than go to the club with you. Ooh, I’d rather get my face surgically altered to look like that lunatic rich lady with the lion head than go to the club with you.
RORY: Would you like me to drive so you can continue your diatribe?
LORELAI: Would ya? Thanks. I’d rather cut off my head and use it as a punch bowl than go to the club with you. ~ Lorelai and Rory from Gilmore Girls

RORY: When are you going to let your parents know that you listen to the evil rock music? You’re an American teenager, for God’s sake.
LANE: Rory, if my parents still get upset over the obscene portion size of American food, I seriously doubt I’m gonna make any inroads with Eminem. ~ Rory and Lane from Gilmore Girls

Rory:You, me, donuts, coffee, standing out in a snowstorm.
Lorelai: At midnight?
Rory: At midnight.
Lorelai: You are my favorite daughter! ~ Rory and Lorelai from Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: I was almost crushed by a papier mache star. How's your day?
Luke: Well, it's looking pretty good now.
Lorelai: Coffee please, no shot of cynicism. ~ Luke and Lorelai from Gilmore Girls

Lane: The very concept of childbirth is vaguely disturbing.
Rory: Yeah. Kids are cool and all, but getting there seems like a big cosmic joke.
Lane: Definitely thought up by a man.
Rory: My mom said that when she told me where babies come from.
Lane: My mom still hasn't told me.
Rory: Really?
Lane: When my cousin got pregnant, she said it's because an angel brushed its wings against her face.
Rory: I could fill you in on the details sometime if you want.
Lane: No thanks, I've picked it up off the streets. ~ Rory and Lane frome Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: What happened? The reception on the phone sucked. All I heard was "Rory" and "Chilton" and "Get down here." Whose butt do I have to kick?
Rory: We didn't go to breakfast.
Lorelai: What are you talking about?
Rory: We came here. They broke into the headmaster's office as the big initiation.
Lorelai: Ugh, those stupid girls.
Rory: Uh huh. Part of the initiation was ringing a bell. So, that's what I was doing when security showed up and they called you.
Lorelai: That's what you got busted for? That's it? Bell-ringing?
Rory: Yes.
Lorelai: Were you at least smoking a Cuban cigar while you were doing it?
Rory: Mom.
Lorelai: No, I mean, "bad girl, how many times have I told you not to ring bells?"
Rory: interrupting Let's go.
Lorelai: continuing "They can dent, or scratch, and they make dogs go crazy. Who do you think you are, the Hunchback of Notre Dame? Are you French? Circular? I don't think so."
Rory: I'm walking to the car now.
Lorelai: later Was it a big bell at least? ~ Lorelai and Rory from Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: Can I use the fun cutter thingy?
Luke: Not if you call it the fun cutter thingy.
Lorelai: Please?
Luke: Cut the boxes, not your hands.
Lorelai: Good tip, you should teach! ~ Luke and Lorelai from Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: Hey, you didn't wake me up.
Rory: I set the clock.
Lorelai: Yes, but see, the clock stops ringing once I throw it against the wall giving me ample time to fall back to sleep. You, however, never stop yapping no matter how hard I throw you, thus insuring the wake up process. ~ Lorelai and Rory from Gilmore Girls

Luke: Taylor, no, no, no, no, and every day from now on 'til the end of my life, I am gonna come in here and say, "Taylor, no." And when I die, I'm gonna have them freeze me next to Ted Williams, and when they find the cure to what I died of and they unfreeze me, my first words are gonna be, "How's Ted?" followed closely by, "Taylor, no." ~ Luke from Gilmore Girls

Paris: For example, I can instantly deduce that when someone hears the name Paris in the same sentence with the word date, jaws will drop, confused looks will cover faces, words like 'how' and 'why' and 'Quick, Bob, get the children in the minivan because the world is obviously coming to an end.' will immediately fly out of people's mouths. ~ Paris from Gilmore Girls

Rory: ...I want you to come over here to this dresser, open up the top drawer and take out everything that you'd be embarrassed to be wearing during a car accident. Meet me downstairs. Move. ~ Rory from Gilmore Girls

Rory: I can't even open my eyes.
Lorelai: That's okay, there's nothing to see. Kirk's in a Speedo, Taylor's in a skirt, Al's in assless chaps.
Rory: Oh my God, stop. I'm never gonna be able to close my eyes again. ~ Rory and Lorelai in Gilmore Girls

Mia: The town had a fake murder?
Lorelai: Yes, because the town is too dull to have a real murder. ~ Mia nad Lorelai in Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: This is amazing chicken, Mom. I mean it, really great.
Emily: Thank you, Lorelai.
Lorelai: It's like super chicken. I bet it could fly. Have you tried tossing it out the window? ~ Lorelai and Emily from Gilmore Girls

Rory: Who are the rosary beads for?
Lorelai: They're mine.
Rory: What do you need rosary beads for?
Lorelai: They're cute.
Rory: They're for prayer.
Lorelai: Well, pray they match my blue suit.
Rory: They've just upgraded you to a queen-size bed, jacuzzi tub, junior suite in hell. ~ Rory and Lorelai in Gilmore Girls

Lorelai: Luke, we sleep around here. Okay, we like it. It makes us pretty and keeps us from killing our crazy friends. ~ Lorelai from Gilmore Girls

"The Lotus in Konoha blooms twice"- Rock Lee from Naruto

"Are there people who are dear to you? People with something precious to protect will be the ones to...become strong." - Haku to Naruto from Naruto

"The power to believe in yourself. That will become the power to change fate." - Naruto to Neji from the anime Naruto

"I hope...to go to the...same place as you..."-Zabuza to Haku in Naruto

"Troublesome"- Shikamaru in Naruto

"By the way, I'm a boy" - Haku from Naruto

“If you want to kill me, despise me, hate me, and live in an unsightly way… Run, and cling to life, and then some day, when you have the same eyes as I do, come before me.” - Uchiha Itachi from Naruto

"I got lost on the road of life" - Kakashi from Naruto

"I love only myself and fight only for myself." - Gaara from Naruto

"Those in the ninja world who break the rules and regulations are called filth, but those who don't care about their companions... are even lower than filth." - Uchiha Obito from Naruto/Kakashi Gaiden

“Of all the trees we could’ve hit, he had to get one that hits back.” - Ron from Harry Potter

"That means you’re going to have ‘trials and suffering’—sorry about that—but there’s a thing that could be a sun… hang on… that means ‘great happiness’… so you’re going to suffer but be very happy….” “You need you’re Inner Eye tested, if you ask me,” - Ron from Harry Potte r

All that is gold soes not glitter, not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither, deep roots aare not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, a light from the shadows shall spring; renenwed shall be the blade that was broken, the crownless again shall be king." - Lord of the Rings

Home is behind, the world ahead, And there are many paths to tread... Through shadow, to the edge of night, until the stars are all alight. Mist and shadow, doubt and blame... all shall fade... all shall... fade. - Pippen, Lord of the Rings

Favorite books: Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Eragon/Eldest, and a few others I'm too lazy to put up here.

Favorite movies: Lord of the Rings, Harry potter, Lion King & Lion King II, Exorcism of Emily Rose, A Nightmare on Elm Street, ect.

Favorite anime/manga: NARUTO, Death Note, Ginga Densetsu Weed & Ginga Nagareboshi Gin, Wolf's Rain, Digimon

Favorite Characters:
Naruto:
Kyuubi
Gaara
Anko
Naruto
Kiba & Akamaru
All Akatsuki (They.Are.Awesome!)

Lord of the Rings:
Aragorn
Frodo
Gandalf

Death Note:
Ryuk
L
Light

Ginga Densetsu Weed/Nagareboshi Gin:
Gin
Smith
Kaibutsu
Jerome

Favorite Pairings:
SasoriXDeidara!! (-squee- so cute together! =D Absolute favorite!)
PeinXKonan (I still hold hope for this)
KakuzuXHidan (They just go together!)
GaaraXNaruto (It's so cute!)
KakashiXRin (Again, it's cute)
KyuubiXNaruto(Mostly friendship)
ItachiXNaruto
KibaXHinata
KisameXItachi

Least Favorite Pairings:
SasukeXSakura
SasukeXIno
NarutoXSakura (I don't hate Sakura or anything, they just don't go together)
TobiXDeidara (Dei-chan wouldn't forget his Danna so quickly; besides, Deidara doesn't like Tobi much)

I am a yoai fangirl, most of the pairings I like are yoai. I am also officially obsessed with the Akatsuki. They're awesome; especially Dei (Un!), Sasori-danna, and Tobi (He's a good boy!). So sad that all of them are dying.

Current or Upcoming fics:

Note: I will NEVER abandon a fic, even if it takes years to write.

The Three Jinchuriki:
Harry Potter's parents, James Potter and Lily Potter, were visiting thier Uchiha relatives at the time of the demon attack on Konoha. Not only did Kyuubi attack, but so did the five-tailed wolf, Gobi no Hokou. ANBU, mistaking Harry for an orphan when they found him, gave him to the Yondaime to seal the wolf in. After his parent's death, Harry was then sent to live with the Uchiha clan as a last wish of his parents. Watch as Harry grows up not only an Uchiha, but as a Jinchuriki as well, with Naruto and Gaara beside him the whole way. See as they go through trials at school, deal with demons, and survive training by the possibly most sadistic Jounin in Konoha! Status: In Progress, next chapter will be posted ASAP
Yes, I know that Uchiha!Harry has been done before, but I really wanted to write one... I don't think Jinchuriki!Harry has been done before, though I could be wrong. If it looks to much like another author's story, please let me know. I will also include some one shots from the universe of The Three Jinchuriki.

Dawn of Hogwarts:
Kakuzu, Hidan, Sasori, and Deidara are sent on a mission together by Pein. It was supposed to be a 'simple S-class mission', just go into Kumo, kill a few dozen jounins, and steal an important scroll for Pein. Right? Wrong! When they're attacked by an ANBU commander, his team, and the Raikage himself, they have no choice but to leave scroll-less and try again later. Since there is no other escape possible, Sasori uses a new teleportation technique that Pein taught him to teleport him and his team mates back to the Hideout. However, something goes wrong and the four see a bright flash and find themselves in an unfamiliar, dark forest. And what's a giant castle doing right outside the forest? And is that a unicorn?! Why the hell is this senile old man waving a stick at them?! Oh boy, how are they going to get out of this mess? Pein definitely isn't going to be happy with them... hell, he won’t even believe them! "We're screwed. Seriosly." Couldn't have said it better myself, Hidan. Status: In Progress, next chapter will be posted ASAP
Harry PotterXNaruto crossover

Naruto: Wolf Child:
Two months after the Kyuubi was sealed, three 'Kyuubi haters' kidnapped Naruto and left him for dead deep within a forest at the edge of Fire Country. Little did they know that they were being watched. They had left the jinchuriki in the territory of a large pack of wolves, but not ordinary wolves; wolves that had demon blood running through thier veins, making them smarter, stronger, and larger than normal wolves. A female of the pack had seen the three men abandon Naruto, and the alpha female of that wolf's pack adopted Naruto as her own. Watch as Naruto fights to survive among his adopted family in the wild, hunting, sleeping, and living among the wolves as a Wild Child. Status: In Progress, next chapter ASAP
Naruto fanfiction, major AU

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Melody of the Fox by Jetslinger reviews
Naruto is determined to bring Sasuke back to Konoha. However, someone he didn't expect wants to help. NarutoxTayuya.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 44 - Words: 302,773 - Reviews: 4074 - Favs: 4,134 - Follows: 3,570 - Updated: 10/16/2014 - Published: 4/7/2007 - Naruto U., Tayuya
Naruto, the Lycan Ninja by mdizzle reviews
Naruto's father was a werewolf, what happens when his own werewolf abilities finally start to surfice. NarutHarem, IrukaHarem. When I say IrukaHarem I mean he gets the women that are a lot older than Naruto. NO YAOI! Chapter 20 fixed up a little.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 72,030 - Reviews: 1443 - Favs: 1,569 - Follows: 1,450 - Updated: 2/24/2013 - Published: 12/19/2006 - [Naruto U., Hinata H.]
Kyuubi's Heir by shadowcat971 reviews
At the age of five Naruto is saved from his darkness, or is he? He finds a mother in the one that caused him so much pain, watch him as he gathers the last of the demons and becomes their immortal heir. Demonic!Naruto,FemKyuu, No pairings
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Family - Chapters: 11 - Words: 48,400 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 383 - Follows: 338 - Updated: 11/12/2012 - Published: 7/9/2008 - Naruto U., Kyuubi/Kurama
Hidden In The Vents by Uzumakiblood reviews
At the age of three Naruto found the vents to the Hokage tower, and became friends with some missing nins. Four years later after a series of events, Naruto and his friends are kidnaped by his friends who call themselves the Akatsuki! -no yaoi!-
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 97,478 - Reviews: 695 - Favs: 779 - Follows: 717 - Updated: 4/9/2012 - Published: 6/24/2008 - Naruto U.
Mania by Songstone reviews
A swear-happy young man with tourettes syndrome, a gorgeous blond with an eating disorder, and a hyper sexual Uchiha; collage life will be complicated enough for them as it is, but you haven't even met their love interests yet.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 11 - Words: 34,401 - Reviews: 299 - Favs: 231 - Follows: 255 - Updated: 12/20/2011 - Published: 2/28/2008 - Kakuzu, Hidan
Sasuke's Pet by Kyuubi No Kitsune reviews
Kyuubi turns Naruto into a small fox. Sasuke finds him and takes care of his injured arm. Naruto doesn't know how to change back and learns more about Sasuke then he thought about him. Minor SasuNaru shounen ai -discontinued-
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 26,469 - Reviews: 320 - Favs: 224 - Follows: 204 - Updated: 11/27/2011 - Published: 8/20/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U.
He Doesn't Understand by papercut ai reviews
Deidara and Sasori are very different, and there are a lot of things they don't understand about each other. The Akatsuki, plotting, and mentally scarring leads to eventual DeiSas. has been changed to mature for later chapters
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 37,244 - Reviews: 400 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 8/18/2011 - Published: 2/19/2007 - Deidara, Sasori
Carry Our Burdens by rose-of-alabaster reviews
ABANDONED. Hogwarts needs protection. Protection that comes from something Voldemort has never seen before. The answer? Six Anbu level ninja from Konahagakure. Naruhina. Sasusaku. Nejiten. Shika, Ino, Kiba, & Hanabi much later.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 38 - Words: 124,258 - Reviews: 775 - Favs: 639 - Follows: 639 - Updated: 6/7/2011 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Harry P., Naruto U. - Complete
Akatsuki and Harry Potter by TobiFromAkatsuki reviews
Akatsuki are not an evil organization, they are just mercenaries. And they are hired to protect Hogwarts, but first Harry and his friends need to find them all, scattered around the world. NarutoxHP crossover.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 39 - Words: 49,725 - Reviews: 248 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 11/19/2010 - Published: 6/14/2008
The Bonding of Two by No No 22 reviews
After having a horrible past, Naruto moves to Konoha for a second chance. But Naruto is empty...no longer full of life. But then Uchiha Sasuke comes along. Can Sasuke get Naruto's light back? Read to find out! Rated M, later on! You won't be disappointed!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 17 - Words: 71,910 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 150 - Updated: 11/3/2010 - Published: 8/10/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
Thoughts of a Hyuga Father by Cece and Tems reviews
:Chap 11: Naruto. drunk!Hiashi. Karaoke. Miscommunication. Shots. Yo Mama fights. Assumptions. Brawls. Bonding? :: The protective big daddy vs. the idiot. The prize: Hinata. Naruto has no chance against Hiashi :: .:Crack:. .:NaruHina:.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 11 - Words: 15,704 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 7/3/2010 - Published: 1/13/2008 - Naruto U., Hinata H.
Son of the Kyuubi by Dzero9 reviews
Honoring the Yondaime, The Kyuubi no Yoko raises Naruto as his own son. NaruHina, SasufemHaku, ItaAya, others.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 34 - Words: 69,952 - Reviews: 501 - Favs: 633 - Follows: 552 - Updated: 6/20/2010 - Published: 6/20/2008 - Naruto U., Hinata H.
Demonic Nemesis by DarkFayt reviews
Naruto has always had the makings of Ultimate Power. What if he developed a few special abilities and truly trained before team 7? How far could Naruto reach in life if pushed to do so? Lets see...NarutoXHarem
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 190,424 - Reviews: 2112 - Favs: 2,885 - Follows: 2,505 - Updated: 6/12/2010 - Published: 7/26/2007 - Naruto U., Kyuubi/Kurama
The Nine Broken Mirrors by Ayien reviews
When Suna attacks, Naruto and Gaara must abandon Konoha, find the other jinchuuriki, and unlock the secrets of the Village of Shadows, or all is lost. But it is only six years later, when Konoha comes demanding help, that the last Great War begins.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 34 - Words: 194,734 - Reviews: 2611 - Favs: 3,076 - Follows: 2,531 - Updated: 6/9/2010 - Published: 7/28/2007 - Naruto U., Gaara
Pridian Moon by SalineRabbits reviews
.:Ch 25 posted:. Crossover, Harry Potter Naruto Six months after the attack of Kyuubi, Hatake Kakashi is being hunted by a merciless traitor. In order to protect him, Sandaime is forced to send him far away, to a land of magic and wizards.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 25 - Words: 99,178 - Reviews: 1107 - Favs: 835 - Follows: 988 - Updated: 6/8/2010 - Published: 6/14/2007 - Kakashi H.
Things Team Nineteen Are No Longer Allowed To Do by H.E. Gray reviews
Iruka's genin team was never normal, by any definition of the word.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,842 - Reviews: 1097 - Favs: 2,298 - Follows: 1,445 - Updated: 2/21/2010 - Published: 8/10/2007 - Iruka U., Kotetsu H.
MyHighSchoolYears :DISCONTINUED: by Toejones reviews
It was my second year of high school when I met him. We met in one of the most f&* ing unlikely places… Heh…and the most un-f&*%ing-likely thing happened…But I’ll explain that later. Let’s start from the beginning………//////////// Updated version on profile
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 23,137 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 1/24/2010 - Published: 6/16/2008 - Hidan, Kakuzu
Akatsuki Employee Handbook by Lady Khali reviews
A guide to all things Akatsuki, including our internal rules and regulations. Written by Akatsuki members, for Akatsuki members, and subject to approval by senior management: Pain and Madara. All edits are final. Dispute at your own risk.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 19 - Words: 26,755 - Reviews: 429 - Favs: 825 - Follows: 219 - Updated: 12/21/2009 - Published: 6/17/2008 - Pain/Pein, Madara U. - Complete
Naruto's Going Digital by CrimsonTearsSharingan reviews
Summary: After failing to bring back Sasuke, Naruto is attacked and runs from the village. Naruto discovers a blue card and creates a vortex into a different world. What will be awaiting him on the other side? A Naruto Digimon Tamers xover.
Crossover - Digimon & Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 158,702 - Reviews: 1289 - Favs: 1,022 - Follows: 871 - Updated: 9/27/2009 - Published: 10/22/2007 - Ruki M./Rika N., Naruto U.
3am :: Various One Shots of Sasuke and Naruto by Lystee reviews
Various and unconnected Naruto and Sasuke related oneshots. They range from crack to fluffy to angst to warm and fuzzy. Please read, and I hope you enjoy!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 84 - Words: 85,345 - Reviews: 742 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 109 - Updated: 8/19/2009 - Published: 9/17/2007 - Sasuke U., Naruto U.
Naruto and the Goblet of Fire by Reidluver reviews
Unwillingly brought into a strange world, trying to hide your secrets, being there during a tournament that hasn't been held in over a century, and oh, having the most powerful wizard seeking you for your power. Simple? I think not.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 23 - Words: 127,836 - Reviews: 1557 - Favs: 1,691 - Follows: 943 - Updated: 6/15/2009 - Published: 7/31/2007 - Harry P., Naruto U. - Complete
The Guard, the Guarded, and the Guardian by xxxalchemist reviews
HPXNaruto NarutoxHP a youngKakashi finds himself in the forbidden forest, and is soon discovered byDumbledore. Kakashi, injured and throughly confused, is ordered to attendHogwarts and protect Harry Potter. But how is his own past tied up in wizard affair
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Suspense - Chapters: 11 - Words: 20,877 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 165 - Updated: 4/2/2009 - Published: 10/19/2007 - Kakashi H.
Magical Experiences by Blackfang8 reviews
Being revised, NOT ABANDONED. Sasuke's turned into a cat. Naruto and the others go to Hogwarts to protect Harry. While there Naruto's turned into a sixyear old, causes chaos, and plays matchmaker. Smart Naruto. Boyxboy. Yaoi. Multiple pairings.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 89,672 - Reviews: 331 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 292 - Updated: 4/1/2009 - Published: 10/20/2006 - Naruto U. - Complete
A Tall Cappuccino by I Spaz With Pizzazz reviews
Sasori is the artistic coffee addict who never really had a friend until he meets Deidara, a pyromaniac who also happens to be the new employee at Starbucks. Sasori/Deidara. Shounen-ai, AU. COMPLETE
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 29,631 - Reviews: 306 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 3/22/2009 - Published: 7/10/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
Fine Line by Hazel-Kitsune reviews
Deidara, a 17 year old teenager, has recently transfered to Konoha Boarding School, where his new room mate, Sasori, is less than welcoming towards the new student. Does he hate the new blonde stranger, or are his feelings far stronger than even hatred?
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,428 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 2/17/2009 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Deidara, Sasori
Zoumitsu Senpuu by RaInAwAiTs reviews
Naruto has been raised as a weapon. Anbu captain since seven, he grew up as one of the elite ninja. With an adult mind and a childish personality, he meets his genin team...Rewritimg chapters 1-7
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 19,341 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 175 - Follows: 220 - Updated: 1/15/2009 - Published: 6/21/2008 - Naruto U.
Animal I am by Anonymous Howler reviews
Naruto/Hp crossover:You know Naruto’s story and you know Kakashi’s story, but what if there was someone else there too? What if that someone else was Kakashi’s little brother? This is his story.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,025 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 364 - Follows: 484 - Updated: 1/10/2009 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Harry P., Kakashi H.
Beginnings of Magic and Chakra by claretyj reviews
Team Minato recieves a strange S-rank mission that gets more and more complicated as time pass by. With the war that is threatening to break out between Konoha and Iwa, will they manage to plough through this? HP Naruto crossover. No pairings.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 30,512 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 12/25/2008 - Published: 5/9/2008 - Kakashi H., Torune
Bloody by blueball reviews
An AU fan fiction. Deidara is a normal teen who's dying from an unknown disease, Sasori is a cold hearted vampire who loves killing. Somehow the latter ends up saving the blonds life... Eventual SasoDei
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 37,655 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 10/7/2008 - Published: 1/23/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
Some Things Are Meant To Be Broken by zigyy553 reviews
Naruto wanted a break from ANBU missions, so Tsunade offered him a one. It was a mission, but a vacation. All he had to do was sign and accept. Too bad he didn't read the fine print. What the hell was 'Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry? NaruTonks
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 36,375 - Reviews: 330 - Favs: 332 - Follows: 361 - Updated: 8/12/2008 - Published: 11/15/2007 - Naruto U.
se c r e ts by cherrySUNSETx reviews
such a secret is too much for one person · kakuhida
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,340 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 8/12/2008 - Published: 5/5/2008 - Hidan, Kakuzu - Complete
Nushi o Naraku by Kerink reviews
Hidan feels he and Kakuzu should be more than just partners. KakuHida
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 10 - Words: 52,189 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 8/2/2008 - Published: 6/24/2008 - Kakuzu, Hidan - Complete
The Bird and the Worm by Edward Elric is a cutiepie reviews
I knew as much as I hated it. I'd be his. He was the bird I was the worm, he was, one way or another going to get my heart. PeinxKonan High Scool Fic. Thank you for over two thousand views! IS HAPPY XD
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 16,112 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 8/1/2008 - Published: 2/22/2008 - Konan, Pain/Pein
beautiful S P L I N T E R by I Spaz With Pizzazz reviews
Sasori was closing himself up. Deidara couldn't stand watching. Shounen-ai, Deidara/Sasori. -Complete-
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,320 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/21/2008 - Published: 7/2/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
Cake by Ed-L reviews
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Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,295 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/19/2008 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
15 Problems with Weddings Sasuke & Naruto style by darknecromancer666 reviews
Sasuke and Naruto are getting married, here are 15 problems that could go wrong. YAOI OOCness
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,339 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
I See Dead People by Ninjirate reviews
Fem!Naru. Naruko gains a bloodline limit that allows her to see the ghost and bring them back to life for short pieces of time. What happens when she falls for a ghost of a certain Uchiha? Rated T to be safe
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,006 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 225 - Updated: 7/15/2008 - Published: 4/17/2008 - Naruto U., Torune
Forbidden Kingdom by Zitianos reviews
When Deidara moves to town, he discovers that nothing is what you seem, and death isn't permanent. AU, Sasori/Deidara ON HIATUS
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,237 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 7/13/2008 - Published: 4/27/2008 - Deidara, Sasori
Cindeirella by rainbow cupcake reviews
Konoha High School's drama club is putting on a production of Cinderella this year, but the casting list is not at all what the students had hoped for. SasoDei.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 10,003 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 7/10/2008 - Published: 4/18/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
The Truth Behind Him by Harmony909 reviews
Naruto has a great secret, one no one must know about, hidden behind his mask. So what happens when the truth is uncovered? Super and Anbu!Naruto.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,604 - Reviews: 268 - Favs: 502 - Follows: 547 - Updated: 7/8/2008 - Published: 2/24/2008 - Naruto U.
Parallel Lines by I Spaz With Pizzazz reviews
..."I can't deny it and I can't run away from it." DeiSaso one shot.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 543 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/8/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
Two and One by Silver1Sun reviews
Naruto and Sasuke are ANBU in a time of peace. When a request comes in from England, Naruto is happy to oblige. Naruto Harry Potter crossover. SasuNaru pairing by popular vote
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 21,886 - Reviews: 242 - Favs: 242 - Follows: 443 - Updated: 7/6/2008 - Published: 7/10/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U.
Bon odori Fireworks by Scarletfire.z reviews
After the festival, they walked into a park full of sakura trees and did an unexpected thing. SASODEI
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,265 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/1/2008 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
Akatsuki Bloopers! by Just a Mutt reviews
Just a bunch of random scenes with the Akatsuki and, erm... other people too, I guess. Warning : Author is clinically insane. Chapter 26 is up and the rating might change to M.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 19,896 - Reviews: 270 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 6/28/2008 - Published: 11/4/2007 - Deidara, Sasori
Technophobia by Emerald707 reviews
In which, the Akatsuki have a new feature installed in the hideout - and Hidan does not appreciate it. Crack!fic. Unlikely to be updated.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,472 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 6/25/2008 - Published: 1/4/2008 - Hidan, Kakuzu - Complete
Things Konoha Genin are not Allowed to do by jgkitarel reviews
A series of things that Konoha's genin are not allowed to do in order of teams. Now, a blast from the past! The one! The only! Team Minato!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,844 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 6/23/2008 - Published: 5/23/2008
When Insanity Calls by luck33ang3l reviews
-AU shonen ai- -SasoDei, KisaIta- Dumped in a mental institute, Sasori is befriended by a pyromaniac by the name of Deidara. With the help of Deidara, Sasori struggles to face the past he is so desperately trying to forget.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 10 - Words: 51,661 - Reviews: 285 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 188 - Updated: 6/19/2008 - Published: 9/3/2007 - Sasori, Deidara
Blood by storynerd reviews
Metallic red flowed from the wound. The thread of blood swished back and forth, following his commands. How does it feel controlling blood, Naruto? blood line!
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 23,658 - Reviews: 407 - Favs: 620 - Follows: 802 - Updated: 6/18/2008 - Published: 5/28/2006 - Naruto U.
moondance by yrume reviews
SasoDei One-Shot - shounen ai/yaoi, fluff - Sasori is at home, relaxing after a mission during a heavy storm, when a familiar blond falls down from the sky...
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,522 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
Masala Dosa by firefly reviews
Kakuzu is a slave to bargains, Hidan likes the spice of variety, and a dingy little restaurant provides a quaint intermediate between the two. Crackfic.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,145 - Reviews: 212 - Favs: 541 - Follows: 46 - Published: 4/27/2008 - Hidan, Kakuzu - Complete
Akatsuki As Kids! by ToxicTenshi reviews
Rugrats meets Akatsuki! What shall ensue? This is what Akatsuki would be like as kids.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 554 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/2/2008 - Akatsuki - Complete
Disposing of Teeth by PassiveAggressive101 reviews
Itachi never bothers to ask and Kisame never bothers to tell.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,851 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 2/6/2008 - Published: 7/20/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U.
Almost a Squib by BajaB reviews
What if Vernon and Petunia were even more successfull in 'beating all that nonsense' out of Harry? A silly AU story of a nonpowerful, but cunning, Harry.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 46,899 - Reviews: 967 - Favs: 2,928 - Follows: 619 - Updated: 1/18/2008 - Published: 11/11/2007 - Harry P. - Complete
Dawning of Magic by Goggleplex reviews
To protect 'The Holder of Magic' Hogwarts itself invoked a spell that calls a group as protectors. But Konoha is too big a group and a single team is too small. Which group is the perfect size? The Akatsuki actually. discontinued
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 20,095 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 12/21/2007 - Published: 11/17/2007 - Obito U./Tobi, Deidara
Life by America's Crazy Cats reviews
He's always watching her, sitting there as she looks at the stars. He just wants to ask her one little question... Fem! Deidara SasoDei
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 598 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/19/2007 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
Shovels by Atopos reviews
A drabble about Kakuzu and Hidan walking around with a shovel. Warning: Hidan's in it, so what do you think?
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 349 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/5/2007 - Hidan, Kakuzu - Complete
A Failed Mission by Overlyinspired reviews
After Kisame and Itachi are defeated by Jiraya and fail to capture Naruto, they begin to return to the base, but along the way, a chakra drained Itachi gets very ill. Slight KisaIta
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,254 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 14 - Published: 10/26/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Liar, Liar, Burn in Hell by Damned Lolita reviews
We all know Ash's Charizard refuses to obey. But why? Defiance is his vengeance... and in the end, Ash will know his sins. Whether or not he wants to. [Oneshot]
Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 865 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/11/2007 - Complete
One Way To Put It by Aurifex reviews
[KonaPein, implied other pairings] It's hard being the only heterosexual left in the whole place...
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 740 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/9/2007 - Konan, Pain/Pein - Complete
Four Letter Words by Momosportif reviews
KakuHida fluff fest! Sometimes they wonder what they feel for their partner and the answer's only four letters long. Fluff fluff fluff! And more fluff! Characters are God's, aka Kishimoto's. Smile! [oh, and it switches pov at the line]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 452 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 21 - Published: 10/8/2007 - Kakuzu, Hidan - Complete
Umbrella by Momosportif reviews
KakuHida semifluff! How two seeming enemies can be united by something as simple as a little rain and an umbrella. Kishimoto's characters! Prize fic for Emerald ElfSlytherin. Review if inclined and enjoy! Smile!
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,198 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 46 - Published: 10/6/2007 - Kakuzu, Hidan - Complete
Not Unheard Of by Momosportif reviews
SasoDei oneshot! Puppeteers lead a somewhat closed off life but Sasori aims to change that and discovers a bit more about his partner, himself, and the beauty of art in the process. Dei and Sori are Kishimoto's lovelies! Read, enjoy and review if inclined
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,459 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/29/2007 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
Be Still I'm Right Here Shut Up and Kiss Me by Momosportif reviews
KisaIta, KakuHida, and SasoDei drabblefluff! Originally a oneshot but now a drabble collection due to someone's inspirational request. Switches POV so watch out. Characters are Kishimoto's. Read, enjoy, and review if so inclined! Smile
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,703 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/22/2007 - Published: 9/10/2007 - Kisame H., Itachi U. - Complete
Akatsuki Mourning by Overlyinspired reviews
The Akatsuki are family, and they mourn as a family at the loss of their own.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/14/2007 - Itachi U., Kisame H. - Complete
A Father's Gift by Overlyinspired reviews
A Hyuuga tradition leads to a touching moment between Neji and his uncle, Hiashi.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,161 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 29 - Published: 9/14/2007 - Neji H. - Complete
The Dangers of Cooking by Overlyinspired reviews
Deidara scorches himself cooking and Sasori helps him with the burns..........I couldn't really think of a summary. SasoDei. Don't like, don't read.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,674 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/24/2007 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
150 Things Konoha Shinobi Are Not Allowed To Do by afriendtosell reviews
Just for fun. Mostly Crack. [Sometimes you just need to take a break from all of the seriousness]
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,654 - Reviews: 169 - Favs: 965 - Follows: 187 - Published: 7/10/2007 - Complete
Ten Ways to Die by H.E. Gray reviews
The Academy textbook says that a ninja is proud to die for their country. This is rarely the truth.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,006 - Reviews: 160 - Favs: 819 - Follows: 77 - Published: 6/16/2007 - Minato N. - Complete
Giggles and Gossip by luck33ang3l reviews
Itachi can't help but overhear a strange conversation.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,238 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/6/2007 - Itachi U. - Complete
Boxes by Nezuko reviews
[Genma Raidou, Oneshot] Genma returns from a mission to find the house not quite right, the television news playing silently to an empty room, and Raidou mysteriously upset. What happens when the news covers a mission.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,609 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/1/2007 - Genma S., Raidou N. - Complete
Leader! by Emerald707 reviews
In which, the Akatsuki must perform an embarrassing ritual they know all too well.
Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 431 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/30/2007 - Deidara, Sasori - Complete
Sundried Palaver by firefly reviews
It was incredibly rare to find a person so pathetic and deprived of love and affection that they’d turn to someone like him for comfort. Love, Zetsu realized, and humanity’s selfish desire for it, had bestowed him with a sense of normalcy.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,185 - Reviews: 263 - Favs: 681 - Follows: 56 - Published: 4/7/2007 - Zetsu - Complete
I'll Stop If You Stop! by Emerald707 reviews
In which, Naruto will stop if Sasuke stops, and vice versa. Yaoi?
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 409 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 19 - Published: 1/28/2007 - Naruto U., Sasuke U. - Complete
Methods of Persuasion by firefly reviews
Tobi glanced around, noticing that the Leader, Deidara, and Kisame were watching Hidan as though he was about to put on a show. He didn’t understand why, since Hidan was merely conversing with the cable man about the TV. Warning: extreme profanity ahead!
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,840 - Reviews: 351 - Favs: 1,261 - Follows: 119 - Published: 10/6/2006 - Hidan, Obito U./Tobi - Complete
Amity by Annie Sparklecakes reviews
A prankster, a brainiac, and an avenger. They don't make sense, but they don't have to. [Team Seven Friendship][Oneshot]
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,107 - Reviews: 227 - Favs: 850 - Follows: 80 - Published: 9/22/2006 - Complete
Fixed Idea by firefly reviews
It's odd, how Temari finds herself bonding with Gaara over the strangest of things. Sickfic.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,968 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 260 - Follows: 32 - Published: 9/7/2006 - Temari, Gaara - Complete
In My Pants by Emerald707 reviews
In which, Harry is cursed by Ron, and is forced to say 'in my pants' after every sentence, with some strange results from the Professors.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,922 - Reviews: 247 - Favs: 418 - Follows: 39 - Published: 4/11/2006 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Kisame, Koi by Kagaya Chou reviews
Itachi rarely needs to speak, but Kisame understands. Kisame x Itachi, if you dare.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,317 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 108 - Follows: 14 - Published: 6/19/2004 - Complete
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Dawn of Hogwarts reviews
Sasori, Deidara, Hidan, and Kakuzu went on a mission for Pein in Kumo. During the mission, Sasori was forced to use a new teleportation technique; something went wrong and the group found themselves in the Forbidden forest. T for Hidan's language&violence
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,483 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 8/12/2008 - Published: 5/23/2008
Naruto: Wolf Child reviews
Two months after the sealing of Kyuubi, three men kidnap Naruto and leave him for dead in the middle of a forest. What they didn't know was that the forest was the territory of a pack of wolves, in which the Alpha female adopts Naruto as her own. AU
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,128 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 157 - Updated: 7/17/2008 - Published: 6/27/2008
The Three Jinchuriki reviews
Harry Potter isn't just a wizard. He is a shinobi of Konoha, and an Uchiha as well. As if that wasn't enough, he has the Gobi no Hokou, the five tailed wolf who attacked the village alongside the Kyuubi, sealed within him. Harry Potter and Naruto xover.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 23,033 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 249 - Follows: 339 - Updated: 7/13/2008 - Published: 5/20/2008
Sasori Will Always Be With Deidara reviews
Just a random songfic about Sasori and Deidara. Takes place after Sasori's death. Deidara finds that Sasori never truly left him. Sasodei one-shot songfic.
Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,021 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/23/2008 - Sasori, Deidara - Complete
Songstone (76)