Jarrtail
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Joined 05-18-08, id: 1579831, Profile Updated: 08-21-10
Author has written 2 stories for Redwall.

You are now entering the realm of Jarrtail. Cash only, please.

A bit about me:

I'm a teenager living in South Texas ("104 degrees during the summer, not counting humidity!") who reads a bit more than is healthy, procrastinates, is rather cynical, and wears t-shirts of questionable sanity. My writing is no where near the best, and I most certainly appreciate concrit.

Possible Upcoming Fanfiction Projects,

Decay: sequel to Smoke. Trilogy planned. You know, if I ever get around to finishing Smoke in the first place.

MY REDWALL ALTER EGO

Name: Jarrtail

Gender: Male

Species: Ferret

Personality: Rather cynical and sarcastic for a SueSlayer, who are traditionally a bit hyper and somewhat optimistic. Has a rather sharp mind and a certain amount of slightly insane inventivness. Along with the ability to read extremely fast, that's where his talents end. Slightly above average physical strength, but not a whole lot of endurance.

Appearance: A little tall, skinny, gray fur. He wears a pair of oval-shaped glasses, which are constantly slipping off or getting smudged. Always wears black or camouflage-colored t-shirt and sweatpants.

Weapon: Garlic-coated scimitar and daggers. Also will make a weapon out of anything on the ground, MacGyver-style.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

My Favorite Quotes

"I could disembowel you, but what to do with eight meters of intestines?" -Bad Cat

"Reincarnation is my only hope" -Dilbert

"I'm an author. Anything you say or do could end up in my novel." -a t-shirt of mine

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Cold and Dark by Kelaiah reviews
A frail pine marten, a sinister wildcat, a haunted otter, a conniving fox... This is their story.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 27 - Words: 99,334 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 10/12/2012 - Published: 1/22/2007 - Complete
The Chains that Bind Us by Jade TeaLeaf reviews
The enemy of my enemy is my ally. Some beasts would do anything for freedom- including allying himself with vermin. How would these two clashing sides change the fates of Mossflower? Betrayal, friendship, redemption, and grief pave their roads.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 60 - Words: 344,651 - Reviews: 792 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 12/29/2011 - Published: 2/22/2008
Official Fanfiction University of Redwall by Kit and Minty reviews
Cowritten by Laburnum Steelfang and kitsune106d. An authorised spinoff of the Fanfiction University of Middleearth, where fanbrats come to learn through pain.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 17 - Words: 82,678 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 9/25/2011 - Published: 10/10/2006
In Sue's Clothing by Much Ado About Nonny reviews
Serious Sue-fic. When Sues take over Redwall, Snowflower & her friends must go to Salamandastron to save their home. But does Salamandastron hold the answer or does Redwall's salvation lie in the paws of a strange mouse who is more than he appears to be?
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Drama/Parody - Chapters: 24 - Words: 69,211 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 6/12/2011 - Published: 8/28/2008
Redwall Fanmail by Kelaiah reviews
Redwall characters answer fanmail that the reviewers send to them. Next up: Gulo and Cregga! More details inside.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 62,218 - Reviews: 187 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 9/13/2010 - Published: 7/11/2009
Redscape by Redwall Survivor Contestants reviews
Evnara is not a happy island. A deadly disease has taken over the mind of its inhabitants, while a rogue former Redwaller has decided to intervene. This is the story of 10 beasts caught in the middle of it all. Visit our website to discuss!
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Adventure - Chapters: 68 - Words: 196,913 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 9/6/2010 - Published: 6/8/2009
Bluefen's Story by Orion's Halo reviews
In "The Outcast of Redwall," Swartt's story was told. Bryony's was told. Veil's was told. But what about Bluefen, the pretty shadow of a wife to whom Mr. Jacques gave no dialogue? This is her story. Rated M for violence, sex, and alcohol use.
Redwall - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 22,461 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 6/23/2010 - Published: 1/5/2009 - Swartt Sixclaw
Throw Down Your Guise by Jade TeaLeaf reviews
Second chances don't come often. Even the stupidest of vermin are aware of that. So when Fate begins to twist vixen's to change life around, what life would she choose? The side that would accept her or the side she knows is right?
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 18 - Words: 74,307 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 6/23/2010 - Published: 3/29/2009
The Emperor's Decree II: No Surrender by Redwall Survivor Contestants reviews
Two vast empires, readying for war. Ten beasts, caught in the middle of it all. Will the Vulpine Imperium prevail, or will the invader have a victory that will change the future of the VI forever? Completed.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 98 - Words: 278,130 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/6/2010 - Published: 2/21/2010 - Complete
Killer Instinct by mbulsht reviews
"Those who live by the sword shall die by it!" cried the Abbot. "So shall those who cower behind high walls and think themselves safe," said Vara coldly. "The day will come, Father Abbot, when you will realize you were wrong. What will you do then?"
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 14,125 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 5/24/2010 - Published: 11/29/2008
The Mossflower Mary Sue Showdown by Oreramar reviews
The Sues are back! This show brought to you by Kalyn the squirrel and Aelin the otter. This time: the cliches pile up and there's trouble underground. Last time: it's squirrel vs. squirrel times two , and there's plotting in the shadows.
Redwall - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 48,759 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/23/2010 - Published: 8/18/2008
A Darker Shade of Red by Irving Forrest reviews
Jasper and Tempson, two superstitious, tavern going vermin, are told three fantastic and terrible tales about the darker side of Redwall Abbey by a mysterious fox who seems to know a thing or two about the supernatural.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Horror - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,443 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 3/12/2010 - Published: 3/7/2010 - Complete
RedVenture 5: Mirage by Redwall Survivor Contestants reviews
A desert oasis has long been the promised land to Sagaru's woodlanders, but shipwrecked vermin have taken it. Nine beasts will play their part in deciding the fate of the oasis. Completed.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 85 - Words: 185,392 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/29/2010 - Published: 10/2/2009 - Complete
Midnight Mossflower 1 by Redwall Survivor Contestants reviews
10 creatures...only one will leave the Castle of Professor Falliss alive. What would you do? Relieves your hunger for survival stories, murder, mayhem, and other fun things. Visit our user page to get to our official website. Completed.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 93 - Words: 251,755 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/29/2009 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Complete
Kelly's Almost Christmas Special by Kelaiah reviews
A throroughly silly fanfic set to a beloved holiday song.
Redwall - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,457 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/15/2009 - Complete
Cullin' of the Fold by Laburnum Steelfang reviews
Sue parody, inspired by Twilight antifandom and the Decemberists. A young squirrelmaid learns that the Abbeydwellers actually have damn good reasons for not consorting with vermin.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,576 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/28/2009 - Complete
Everyone's Favorite Talk Show by warrior4 reviews
Another Sue, another show. Kelaiah, Arawolf, Kayln, Rector, Kris, Aelin, Kit, and Minty all doing what they do best. All alter egos used with permission.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 24,287 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 8/14/2009 - Published: 3/2/2008
With Resentment in Our Eyes by Persarr reviews
A searat captain, visiting the all-vermin port of Meddn, gets caught in the middle of a ravaging storm. The disaster is enough to change the corsair's life forever. Will he be able to survive its effects on his future?
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,002 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/16/2009 - Published: 6/12/2009
Footnotes by Oreramar reviews
These short stories are the footnotes of the legends of Mossflower Wood. They run the gambit from silly, to serious, to speculative. So when you need a break from all of those epic adventures, here is a place for you.
Redwall - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,547 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 6/3/2009 - Published: 4/12/2008
Endangered: A Vermin Memoir by Traxer reviews
The life and times of a weasel, Rueben, a clerk for a classic vermin horde, and his observations on the way into madness. Update: Northern Interlude.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 20,405 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/3/2009 - Published: 1/6/2008
Destiny at a Different Angle by Jade TeaLeaf reviews
Confused by his strange dreams, a kittypet must seek out his destiny. But soon he will learn that there is more to him than any cat predicted. With a guiding spirit and his friends, he must find a way to survive in the wilderness of the outside world.
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 14 - Words: 49,224 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/15/2009 - Published: 9/6/2008
Twelve Days of ChristmasSue Slaying Style by storiewriter reviews
The title says all. A little bunny that kept pestering me to be written. And one of those items is decidedly scary...I mean, one Arawolf is ENOUGH.
Redwall - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 487 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/7/2008 - Complete
Falling Smoke by Kiwikirk reviews
The Clans left Smokepaw for dead. He survives his fall but finds himself wishing he didn't, as a new tribe of cats shoves him to two sides of a bloody, mysterious prophecy. When the lines of trust and loyalty blur, what's a bitter, lost apprentice to do?
Warriors - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 42 - Words: 139,665 - Reviews: 945 - Favs: 214 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 8/28/2008 - Published: 12/13/2006 - Complete
The Ashleg Chronicles by Clouded Horizon reviews
The ongoing tale of Ashleg, the pine marten. Of his fight for acceptance in Noonvale, the war with the terrifying horde of the Owlrider, and most of all Ashleg's journey to accepting himself. COMPLETE!
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 18 - Words: 27,207 - Reviews: 142 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 6/1/2007 - Published: 2/1/2006 - Complete
The Bitter Side of War by The Silvercat reviews
One-shot. Redwall is famous for its glorious feasts after victory...But what if-for once-there was no victory? The other side of war. R&R please.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,742 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12/17/2004 - Complete
Vengeance Quest by Sounasha reviews
When a wolverine slays her father, Riala Goldentail sets off on a quest for vengeance that will lead her through pain and hardship, companionship won and lost, and eventually to the final confrontation... (R for mild sexual content in chapters 12, 14, 16)
Redwall - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 118,793 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 12/6/2004 - Published: 7/15/2004
The Chaotic Soul by The Silvercat reviews
COMPLETE! The sword of Martin is an honorable weapon to carry when called to wield it. Creatures wear it with pride, but... Sometimes the mental burden can cause a beast to regret taking such a prized possession. Please review!
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 19,529 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 11 - Updated: 10/15/2004 - Published: 8/28/2004 - Complete
The Eyes of Evil by Dormant reviews
Wickedness exists somewhere in everyone, even in the best of us. Ask Skipper Jedd; evil is in the eye of the beholder. PG 13 for violence.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,051 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 9/12/2004
Ours Is Not To Reason Why by Amberdulen reviews
After failing to capture Redwall, a rat sails home ...
Redwall - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,482 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/22/2000 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

To Lose a Sword reviews
Non- humor "Mossflower" parody. If Rose lived, returned to Noonvale and married Martin...who would save Mossflower?
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,639 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/22/2010 - Published: 8/10/2010
Smoke reviews
A dark force is engulfing the land, threatening to consume even Redwall itself. Its only hope is a ferret, exiled from the abbey for a crime he didn't commit, and his two peculiar companions, against a danger so great it defeated Martin himself.
Redwall - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,603 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12/27/2009 - Published: 6/29/2009