broadhands
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Joined 05-18-08, id: 1579988, Profile Updated: 12-13-12
Author has written 25 stories for Chronicles of Narnia, Avatar, and Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles.

Why broadhands? Simple, I've got hands like meat axes.

I have been a Narnia fanatic for longer that the internet has been in existence (showing my age here), but I'm not a Christian, as I have too many issues with the hierarchical/patriarchal nature and hypocrisy of the church (and all organised religion for that matter), particularly its ability to ignore basic knowledge, good sense and truth. Just don't get me started on the idiocy of Creationism/Intelligent Design.

Inclined to write poetry of a dark and bleak nature, I occasionally write prose fanfic, but usually save prose writing for my own original work. I'm in the process of writing two novels for (hopefully) publication: one a post-apocalyptic cyberpunk from the viewpoint of a psychotic serial killer, and the other a 1950's crime/espionage potboiler where the heroine is a part time dominatrix. My fanfic will tend to stay as close to canon as I can get, but I enjoy reading well crafted stories no matter what the content.

From the above you can probably guess that I am interested in flawed/damaged characters like Susan and Edmund Pevensie, and where these less than perfect people end up as a result. Do I have character flaws myself? You bet; I've got some doozies.

Do I like slash? If it is integral to the story and the story racks up, but I find sex is really hard to write well, so I tend to set up the initial conditions and let the reader's imagination join the dots. Often it's not what you write, but what you don't. Much sexier.

Why poetry? The emotional impact of poetry can be much greater than prose, and it doesn't take as long to write (but not on a word by word basis). But it's really easy to write really bad poetry, so you need to practice, practice, practice.

Likes

CS Lewis, JRR Tolkien, apples (the fruit, not the computer), hokey-pokey icecream, Indian food, Cate Blanchett, Tilda Swinton, the Top Gear crew, Boston Legal, AC/DC, Cole Porter, haiku, Stephen Jay Gould, Bill Bryson, Richard Dawkins, mains pressure hot water, chick flicks, digging holes, parrots, Shelties, manual transmissions, Niall Ferguson, David Attenborough, dance, Enya, windy roads, big trees, Henry Moore, my 350Z, Avatar (I have lost count of the number of times I have seen it).

Dislikes

Cellphones with small buttons, ID proselytisers, filing, housework, lawn-mowing, idiots, gardening, homophobes, being told what to do or how to think, faith-based reality (those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it), remote controls, Office 2007 (though I'll get used to it), Vista (I never will get used to it), JCL condition codes, micromanagers, tabloids, modern cult of the celebrity, infomercials, Harry Potter (I went to a school just like Hogwarts but without the magic, so the whole premise is just dead boring), hype, telemarketers, Andy Warhol, reading glasses (no choice but to get used to them), driving in weekend traffic, flying, paying my car insurance, trying to land a new job.

'En Pointe' Story Cycle

For those of you who like long Avatar fanfic story cycles, I have written a series of tales regarding four extraordinary dreamwalker women. The first of these concern the story of Na'diakhudoshin, and should be read in the following order:

- New Steps
- En Pointe
- Oversway
- Last of the Uniltìranyu

Then there is the story of Zha'nelle te Manitowabi Eywa'ite, who much to her surprise was permanently transfered into her Avatar body by accident - or was she? Her stories are:

- Overload
- Harmless

The next story in the cycle is that of Sara te Pesuholpxaype Lissa’ite, who was the first human to become an Avatar.

- By The Numbers

In Sara's story we also find out how Na'diakhudoshin came to Pandora, so BTN overlaps with 'New Steps', 'En Pointe' and 'Overload', and Zhong Li makes his appearance. And then there is the tale of Sharon the incredibly foul-mouthed Avatar.

- Sharing The Spirit

Chronologically, it comes after 'By The Numbers', and is parallel to 'Oversway', and also has cameos by both Na'diakhudoshin and Zhong Li.

Finally (as long as no-one gives me any brilliant ideas for new stories - that means you, anders1972), there is a one-shot concerning Doctor Phred Palmer, set after 'Shaping The Spirit', but which arises out of the events in 'By The Numbers'. The story is:

- The Empty Man

Just as a postscript, there are a couple of one-shots featuring Sharon the foul-mouthed Avatar that my readers might enjoy.

- Hot Weather
- Growing Pains

And there's more! A longer format story from the En Pointe cycle that is contemporary with 'The Empty Man':

- Traitor

So go to it!

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Traitor reviews
A young woman feels betrayed by the abandoning of her heritage by the few remaining humans on Pandora. Another story in my En Pointe narrative arc, contemporary with my story 'The Empty Man'.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 23,118 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/2/2013 - Published: 12/12/2012 - Complete
It's A Wrap reviews
Cameron is transported to a different timeline, and never meets John Connor. What does a Terminator do when her mission parameters cannot be achieved? A quick one-shot.
Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,815 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/19/2012 - Cameron - Complete
Growing Pains reviews
Long after the tawtute have been defeated, the teenage daughter of a former uniltìranyu asks to be taught the skills of a warrior by her mother. A one-shot in my En Pointe arc featuring Zharr'n, Tsahik of the Ikranaru.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,394 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/12/2011 - Complete
Hot Weather reviews
One shot dealing with Zharr'n te King Xiùlán'ite - how the hot season recalls memories of her life before she became an Avatar. A follow-on from 'Shaping The Spirit' in my En Pointe continuity. Oh, if you can't handle obscene language, do not open!
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,342 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/29/2011 - Complete
The Empty Man reviews
A one-shot in the 'En Pointe' narrative cycle, telling the story of Doctor Phred Palmer after his return to Pandora. Chronologically set after 'Shaping The Spirit', but growing out of the events of 'By The Numbers'
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,253 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/13/2011 - Complete
Shaping The Spirit reviews
Another installment in the 'En Pointe' narrative arc, parallel to 'Oversway' and following on from 'By The Numbers'. The story of Sharon the incredibly foul-mouthed Avatar. WARNING - if you are offended by frequent coarse language, do not read.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 26 - Words: 72,995 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/10/2011 - Published: 4/18/2011 - Complete
By The Numbers reviews
Have you ever wondered how the Avatar program started? As you might expect from the RDA, it wasn't all clear sailing, as one of the first candidates discovered. This story is part of my 'En Pointe' narrative arc.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 51 - Words: 127,430 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 4/16/2011 - Published: 11/8/2010 - Complete
Harmless reviews
One-shot sequel to 'Overload' featuring former Avatar driver Zha'nelle te Manitowabi Eywa'ite and her efforts to manage her mate Mìnkxetse and his brother Tsawlontu.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,171 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/21/2010 - Complete
Overload reviews
Noted xeno-zoologist and Avatar driver Dr Janelle Manitowabi gets more than she bargained for in her studies of Pandora's peak land predator. Prequel to New Steps/En Pointe/Oversway/Last of the Uniltiranyu
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 51 - Words: 81,271 - Reviews: 89 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 10/19/2010 - Published: 9/5/2010 - Complete
Last of the Uniltìranyu reviews
Final chapter in the story of Na'diakhudoshin, palulukan girl from beyond the sky. One-shot sequel to 'New Steps', 'En Pointe' and 'Oversway'.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,092 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/31/2010 - Complete
Oversway reviews
The continuing story of Na'dia, former Avatar driver and palulukan girl from beyond the stars. Sequel to 'New Steps' and 'En Pointe' set years after the clashes between the RDA and the Na'vi. She feels disquiet in the flow of life energy through Eywa.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 30 - Words: 41,847 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/27/2010 - Published: 6/22/2010 - Complete
En Pointe reviews
Follow up fic to 'New Steps' one shot. A not so light-hearted look at Na'diakhudoshin's trials with joining the Omaticaya after passing through the Eye of Eywa, set a couple of weeks after the RDA are tossed off Pandora.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 52 - Words: 73,348 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 6/16/2010 - Published: 4/12/2010 - Complete
Future Tense reviews
Post movie - Jake is summoned to the Well of Souls by the Ni'awve Mokri, the mysterious shaman of the Tipani clan, where he is told of the origins of the Na'vi.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 45 - Words: 44,703 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 4/10/2010 - Published: 3/6/2010 - Jake S., Trudy C. - Complete
New Steps reviews
One shot - A young woman with a painful history enters the Avatar program - parallels with the movie, in more ways than one. If you liked this, there is a longer sequel - 'En Pointe' - that picks up where this leaves off.
Avatar - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,846 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/5/2010 - Complete
Live Cross reviews
Narnia Network News live cross to entertainment reporter Trixie the Dryad, interviewing Tash the Inexorable at the premiere of The Last Battle, and after a couple of his major gigs.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,285 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 12/29/2009 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Tash
A Girl Riding reviews
A twisted look at the encounter between Aravis and Aslan during the race to Anvard in THAHB. It just shows that if you look hard enough you can find sexual allegories anywhere, even in CSL; or is it just me?
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 141 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/24/2008 - Aravis, Aslan - Complete
And Our Final Guest reviews
Pre-TLB One shot. Tash appears on a TV talk show.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 795 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Tash - Complete
Twice A Queen reviews
Follow up light hearted one shot to The Girl Had Dead Eyes - post TLB Susan redemption fic, with implied Suspian just to get the movieverse romantics to read it and sisterly bonding with Lucy. Just can't leave Susan alone.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Humor/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,463 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/19/2008 - Susan Pevensie, Jadis the White Witch - Complete
The Girl Had Dead Eyes reviews
My attempt at a prose oneshot Susan redemption fic, inspired by Tilda Swinton's incredible look of acceptance in in her LWW movie death scene, and by a review of my poem Susan's Lament by Miniver. Will be too bleak for some, but it worked for me.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Angst/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,339 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/15/2008 - Susan Pevensie, Jadis the White Witch - Complete
Haiku: Pattertwig's Orders reviews
At Mercury Grey's request, another haiku - this time on Pattertwig the squirrel from PC.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Complete
Haiku for a Bulgy Bear reviews
Just been to see PC again and noted that a talking bear appeared in the film, and remembered the insistence of a Bulgy Bear in the book to be a marshall of the lists, so ripped off this little haiku in tribute.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Complete
Addict reviews
SC - Just how did the Lady of the Green Kirtle control Prince Rilian for ten years? Read this little poem and find out.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 273 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/29/2008 - Rilian, Lady of the Green Kirtle - Complete
Triumph of the Telmarines reviews
Pre-PC: This little poem tries to give an idea as to why the Telmarines were so reluctant to enter into the forests of Narnia, even after many generations.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 255 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/28/2008 - Complete
Dance on Beruna's Field reviews
LWW - A different take on Edumund's encounter with the White Witch on the field of Beruna. Might be a bit twisted for some, but enjoy. previously called Dance at Beruna, but looks like text got lost somewhere
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 177 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/22/2008 - Edmund Pevensie, Jadis the White Witch - Complete
Susan's Lament reviews
Post-TLB poem on Susan's state of mind. Everyone has to do one Susanfic.
Chronicles of Narnia - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 188 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/20/2008 - Susan Pevensie, Aslan - Complete