edil89
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Joined 06-08-08, id: 1599266, Profile Updated: 05-01-09
Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.

Buttercup:We'll never survive.

Westley: Nonsense. You're only saying that because no one ever has.

Buttercup: You mock my pain.

Westley: Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

Bella: Are you going to tell me how you stopped the van?

Edward: Yeah. Um...I had an adrenaline rush . It's very common. You can Google it.

Edward: What did you expect? Coffins and dungeons and moats?

Bella:No, not the moats.

Edward:Not the moats.

Kate: Do people react this way because we're NCIS, or do you just have that effect on them?

Gibbs: I'd like to think it's me.

Gibbs: Did you run it through...

Abby: Run it through AFIS?

Gibbs: Feisty and psychic.

Abby: It's a killer combination.

I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude

I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch

I'm WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer

I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish

I'm a GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress

I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's ass

I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian

I'm POPULAR, so I MUST be a bitch

I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant

I'm FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual

I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict

I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian

I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie

I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life

I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up

I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention

I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean

I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz

I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math

I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare

I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist

I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore with a jock boyfriend

I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy

I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS

I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head

I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries

I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports

I like CATS, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time

I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi

I'm IN BAND, so I MUST be a geek

I'm from CALIFORNIA, so I MUST be like the girls from "Laguna Beach" and "The OC"

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser

I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals

I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay

I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals

I'm ALWAYS SMILING AND LAUGHING, so I MUST have a great life

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention

I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too

I COPIED AND PASTED THIS INTO MY PROFILE, so I MUST be a plagiarist

I like to READ, so I MUST be a nerd

I FROWN a lot, so I MUST have a bad life

I get BAD GRADES, so I MUST be a slacker who doesn't try

I'm a JEW, so I MUST hate all Germans

I like to listen to HANNAH MONTANA, so I MUST be childish and immature

I DONT HAVE A BOYFRIEND, so i MUST be a lesbian, or a loser

I KNOW HOW TO SEW, so I MUST be old fashioned.

I OBSESS OVER MILEY CYRUS, so I MUST be a loser.

I LIVE IN FLORIDA, so I MUST be tan and hispanic

I'm WHITE, so I MUST not know how dance or run.

I'm WHITE, so i must be a loser.

I'm a NEWYORKER, so I MUST have a bad additude.

I'm the MIDDLE CHILD so I MUST be ignored.

I HAVE A LAPTOP, so i must be a spoiled brat.

I HAVE A MYSPACE, so I MUST be a sexual predator

I'm FROM ITALY, so i must eat only pasta and tomato sauce.

I'm FUNNY, so I MUST not have a care in the world.

Stop stereotypes! Copy this list into your profile and add any more that you can think of

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Two Hearts Beat as One by zeewriter reviews
After being left at the altar by Edward, Bella begins a new life, but is always left wondering what could have been. Will true love prevail years later? AH, Very OOC, M for language and future lemons. Bella & Edward with some Bella & Zafrina femslash
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 67,059 - Reviews: 266 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 11/10/2014 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Bella, Edward
Resentment by TheGirlInThePinkScarf reviews
Based on Beyonce's song 'Resentment'. Leah Clearwater is engaged to be married to her high school sweetheart Jacob Black. Everything changes when he cheats on her with her cousin/maid of honor Emily. Can she forgive them or is she too full of resentment?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 24,117 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 4/23/2011 - Published: 7/12/2009 - Leah, Jacob - Complete
Falling For You by Jen733 reviews
Bella Swan has gone through crappy date... after crappy date, causing her to lose all hope for a good guy. Until she meets Edward Cullen, a divorced father of two. They have an instant connection when they meet, but will love come easily for them? AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,159 - Reviews: 8129 - Favs: 4,993 - Follows: 1,989 - Updated: 9/8/2009 - Published: 3/24/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Roadtrip from Hell by his frightening litle monster reviews
Ever had to take a road trip with your ex? I wouldnt recommend it. This is a story about love and friendship. Sorry not the best at summaries better one inside. EXB/JXA AH, alittle OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,029 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 9/6/2009 - Published: 11/25/2008 - Bella, Edward
You Can't Imagine by Clumsy By Nature reviews
Bella Swan is deeply in love with her best friend: Edward Cullen. Problem? He's about to get marry to a woman that's not Bella.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,013 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 15 - Published: 4/25/2009 - Edward, Bella
Fang and Claw by Cold Drake Queen reviews
SLASH Jacob x Edward A broken heart can be mended only one way.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,633 - Reviews: 139 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 17 - Published: 4/13/2006 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Wedding Date reviews
Bella was heartbroken and as she travels back home for her sister's marriage she doesn't know if she can handle all of the festivaties espeacially since her ex is the bestman, but courage just came in the form of a male escort. ExB canon
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 3,335 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 7/2/2009 - Published: 3/30/2009 - Bella, Edward
freakum dress reviews
Bella and Edward have both been cheated on what they don't know is that their former loves cheated on them with the other person's partner. Will They be able to find love with eachother?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 5,737 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 2/16/2009 - Published: 9/19/2008 - Bella, Edward