im with the vampires3
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Joined 06-23-08, id: 1614186, Profile Updated: 07-31-10
Author has written 13 stories for Twilight.

Okay, not much to say about myself. I'll let my favorite things tell you. Well besides the facts that i am semicrazy, i have two best friends, i'm a junior in highschool, i don't freak when i see someone famous, my name is Meg, i am female, and i am very, very sarcastic. Oh, and i'm writting a book myself.

I am an artist...I would post some of my artwork on my profile, but i don't want to be told 'you suck' or anything. I'm not bad, it's just my scanner doesn't cooperate.

I actually like the thought of having children after i'm out of college...if i go. Im not sure that i will anymore what with the book writing...and drawing...and all kinds of stuff...

I've never reacted normally to things. I can sit through a tornado without feeling threatened. everyone else around me will be freaking out and i'm at a calm...

Favorite quotes...

I'm a little tea pot short and stout. Here is my handle here is my... Well i'll be damned. I'm a sugar bowl.

SILENCE! I kill you!- Achmed the Dead Terrorist. Gotta love it.

I love those moments. I like to wave at them as they pass by- Captain Jack Sparrow. Yay!

You're not yourself today. I noticed the improvement imediately.

Ociffer, I swear to drunk, I'm not God.

SARCASM is just another free service i offer.

I like you. when the world is mine, your death shall be quick and painless.

I'm not ALWAYS late. Sometimes i just don't show up.

Anybody want a peanut? hehehe...guesses anyone?

no, i will not kill the jews. I will toss a penny between them and watch them fight to the death...yes, yes, I did the same thing with two catholic priests once except i tossed in a small boy. The winner had to fight Michael Jackson! once again Achmed the dead terrorist...well damn...guess this one isnt in function anymore but i'll keep it lol

Silly blondes, brains are for brunettes!

If you didn't have feet, would you wear shoes? No? Well then why do you wear a bra?

Is it a bad sign if even my imaginary friends won't talk to me?

SAVE THE TREES! Wipe your butt with an owl.

The more i get to know boys, the more I like dogs.

There are a lot of flat squirrels on the road who couldn't make up their mind.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.

If you're going to have two faces, can you at least make one of them pretty?

Knock knock. Who's there? Me, I kill you.

Don't let your mind wander. It's much to small to go unsupervised.

walk a mile in someone elses shoes. Then you're a mile away from them and you've got their shoes!

Boys are like slinkys. Useless, but fun to push down the stairs

It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

A man without a wife is like a vase without cute

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

I have my own little world, but its okay...they know me here.

We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.

Random things to do...

BBQ (randomest thing you can say in the middle of a conversation unless it's about BBQ)

go into an elevator and when someone walks in, glare mercelessly, then laugh maniacly, poke them, and repeat.

Here is a joke i think you all might enjoy...

A Minnesota couple decided to vacation to Florida during the winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday. His wife would fly down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile...somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted.

The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: 16 May 2003
I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is not as uneventful as mine was.
P.S. Sure is hot down here!

Another Joke...

There was a blonde who found herself sitting next to a Lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer just kept bugging the blonde wanting her to play a game of intelligence. Finally, the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds, and said every time the blonde could not answer one of his questions, she owed him 5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her 50.00. The lawyer figured he could not lose, and the blonde reluctantly accepted.

The lawyer first asked, "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?"

Without saying a word the blonde handed him 5. then the blonde asked, "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?"

Well, the lawyer looked puzzled. He took several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to find the answer. Finally, angry and frustrated, he gave up and paid the blonde 50.00

The blonde put the 50 into her purse without comment, but the lawyer insisted, "What is the answer to your question?"

Without saying a word, the blonde handed him 5.

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Aliens and Newtons reviews
why isn't Edward paying attention? He's trying to figure something out. Bella was trying to tell him something, but he won't listen to her. What will she do to get his attention?...hope you like this!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 710 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 2/23/2012 - Published: 6/26/2008 - Edward, Bella
Blood lust reviews
these are some poems from different times in the Twilight series i plan to add on more as they come to me.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Poetry - Chapters: 6 - Words: 1,692 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Updated: 9/8/2010 - Published: 7/26/2008 - Edward, Bella
Karaoke Night at the Cullens' reviews
Ah, singing, dancing, bouncy Alice, Angry Edward, crazy Emmett...what more could you want? Oh, and Jasper is sort of high. all original pairings.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 11,074 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 9/17/2009 - Published: 6/26/2008
Colour My World reviews
AU Edward never came back to her because she seemed happy.keyword:seemed. she had the catatonic state and two months depression. she has people who keep her down to earth, though. the rating may change depending on how the story goes. E&B eventually.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 20,392 - Reviews: 109 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 8/17/2009 - Published: 7/5/2008
Christmas at the Cullens' reviews
Alice and Edward have plans for Christmas. A late christmas, but still! Bella only wants her gift for Edward to remain a surprise for now. But will it happen? And what will alice do to keep it under wraps? pun semi-intended
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,251 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/23/2009 - Published: 6/26/2008
To Crash reviews
Bella remembers a story she heard a long time ago and it scares her. One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 526 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/23/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Just a Few Things That Go Bump in the Night reviews
A large, roomy hotel room and no one to share it with...or so she thinks. She keeps on getting these wierd feelings.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Mystery - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,129 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 11/4/2008 - Published: 6/26/2008 - Complete
Brotherly Love reviews
Jasper never seemed to be very fond of Bella in Twilight and then he tried attacked her in a lapse of control during her birthday party. When Alice saw the vision of Bella jumping off the cliff, he realized he had been wrong about Bella.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,438 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/2/2008 - Jasper, Alice - Complete
One of Those Nights reviews
Oh, great. alice is dressing Bella up again. How will Edward react? redone jackets, torn shirts, and...leather pants? throw in a silky something and some lace. wild guesses, anyone? oh and its random stuff so some goes and some doesnt.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,077 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 10/26/2008 - Published: 7/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Of all the Random Things to Notice reviews
Edward doesn't get it. why is Bella laughing at the popcorn package? He'll soon find out...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 877 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 8/27/2008 - Published: 7/1/2008 - Edward, Bella
Eat That! reviews
Oh, no. The boys have been out hunting, and now they have stumbled across a garden... promised funnyness.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,241 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/3/2008 - Published: 6/26/2008 - Complete
Vampire Makeover reviews
Bellas new look... Alice helped her out. All original pairings. And i know this is a little strange.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,246 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/26/2008
Reactions reviews
Emmett is awsome. He's like a big brother, but one who would like to prove something...
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 999 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/26/2008 - Complete