what do dogs do to wolves
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Joined 08-02-08, id: 1655359, Profile Updated: 06-12-11
Author has written 9 stories for Twilight.

profiles are overrated. especially those long-winded ones with copypasta'd poems about "the perfect boyfriend" or unborn babies and picture references to an object that was mentioned for one line in some two-bit story. I mean, the best ones have those "pick 12 of your favorite characters" memes. I love those!


my pen name is ridiculously long, yes. no, it has nothing to do with the shapeshifter/wolves whatever they are now. in fact, it's from an entirely different series that I've been a fan of that's much (much * 10^10) better than Twilight.

I don't do much in regards to the wolves, ironically enough, but I like screwing around with the Twilight canon because, frankly, it stinks. particularly in regards to Bella - horrible, horrible character in my honest and humble opinion. I really can't stand her (or whatever original character mary-sues are made to replace her) in any form, even if she's totally OOC/a disguised author self-insert (which is actually ironic considering that's what she started as!).

So basically, yes, I do hate Twilight (nowadays it's more like tolerhate)... but I love the (good, decent, well-mannered) fans and (well-written) fan fiction of this fandom. some of you guys on here are seriously talented writers, so much that I'm jealous! so here I am, a sick, twisted, anti-thesis of original myself, who originally posted a (now deleted - I do that a lot) story about a much more evil Renesmee because I wanted to fix this poor, unfortunate, mishandled story. hell, I even like Nessie better than Bella because I wasn't obliged to Nessie's inner thoughts for four books straight. plus, Nessie has a lot of potential in fandom. Edward, on the other hand, is semi-tolerable for reasons I currently cannot define at this moment, lol. I think the only character that ranks lower than Bella on my hate!list is Alice, oddly enough.

if you're a fan of my work and you notice I update so very rarely, it's because I'm lazy, but also because I have work, school, and otherwise life interrupting at all times, so I'm sorry if I can't crank out chapters every so-or-so days like the rest of those writers. :/


things that are awesome but also Twilight-y in flavor:
Reasoning with Vampires - amazing dissection of the books. not fan friendly, so be warned.
Growing Up Cullen - where my avatar is from. seriously amazing stuff. fan friendly.


(and the middle name is gonna be baseball!)

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Doll Parts by a nyr byrjun reviews
Originally just a one-shot entitled, Doll Parts. Now a place where a reader, you, can request a fantasy to be written out by me. The minimum written is 1000 words. Almost any pairing, maybe femslash, when I get a chance. Just leave a request. Mature.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,073 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/9/2013 - Published: 6/12/2011 - Bella
Breaking Points by sugarbucket reviews
Ever wonder why Rosalie and Edward are so cold towards one another? Their story from the start; in keeping with the books, but based on the idea that they're both masterful liars. Love, lust, betrayal, desire, lies, darkness and breaking points.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 43 - Words: 413,898 - Reviews: 1119 - Favs: 530 - Follows: 344 - Updated: 2/25/2012 - Published: 8/17/2008 - Edward, Rosalie - Complete
The Ransom of Little Deer by Blueroan reviews
Billy Black and his father were not the first Native Peoples Carlisle Cullen had come in contact with since coming to America. That noble honor belonged to Little Deer and he would never forget her or her courage. pre-Twilight, set in 1810, Carlisle's POV
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 50 - Words: 145,094 - Reviews: 155 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 2/28/2011 - Published: 10/1/2009 - Carlisle - Complete
The Twilight Mary Sue Alphabet by Dreaming Maya reviews
Alphabet poems for Mary Sues in Twilight. "A is for Annabelle-Rosemary-Joan, A vampire who doesn't do anything, but whine and moan ..."
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,205 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/14/2011 - Complete
I Wanna Punch You On The Lips by epicinsanity101 reviews
Sequel to BIIS. Jessica Stanley finds herself surrounded by crazy. Her mother is behaving like a functioning human being, Bella Swan has turned into a zombie, there's some freaky Indian kid following her around and she still feels fat eating a Milky Way.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,461 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 8/12/2010 - Published: 5/14/2010 - Jessica
But Inside I'm Screaming by epicinsanity101 reviews
Jessica Stanley must deal with keeping up appearances, her slutty mother, amazing/annoying friend/zombies, being chubby, having "pent up anger", and falling in like with someone she hates. MikexJess
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 24,419 - Reviews: 474 - Favs: 220 - Follows: 180 - Updated: 5/1/2010 - Published: 11/26/2008 - Jessica, Mike - Complete
Best Friends Forever by epicinsanity101 reviews
Edward and Jessica have been friends since childhood. They've shared laughs, insults and moments of pure perfection. But as they grow older, Edward's attentions soon shift to the enigmatic Bella Swan. Could Jessica be jealous? AU
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,974 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 4/23/2010 - Published: 2/23/2010 - Edward, Jessica
Acid by gschelt reviews
The night before Bella gets married. Lots of unrequited love and angst. Alice/Bella, oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,384 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/11/2009 - Alice, Bella - Complete
The Storm by Alan the Great reviews
Don't read if you like Twilight.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 183 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 5 - Published: 7/26/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Replacement by HPFangirl71 reviews
Edward has left Bella... there is no room for a human in a vampires world... his heart aches to be with her but will he let that destroy him or will he learn to live again without her...?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,062 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 5/13/2009 - Edward, Tanya - Complete
Made For You by Legs reviews
In agony, Rosalie turned and started slowly towards the edge of the precipice, her hands clenched in fists...They might not live through this. But she couldn’t ignore the noise or the smell or the sadness in knowing they were alone and dying...R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 17,177 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 4/29/2009 - Published: 2/10/2009 - Edward, Rosalie - Complete
Bear by I Don't Spell Good reviews
Walking through the park...
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 517 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/20/2009 - Published: 1/23/2009
Beauty Shining in Company with the Celestial Forms by Minisinoo reviews
When Edward rebelled against Carlisle's way of life in 1927, what changed his mind and sent him back in 1931? With a side-serving of White Sox-Cubs rivalry, Camels, Plato and mobsters. Written for the 2008 LGBT fic fest. Non-explicit gay themes.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,611 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 175 - Follows: 32 - Published: 5/5/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

ribbons
AU/AH the twilight characters share in a merry christmas, even in the midst of tragedy. canon pairings. rated for swearing and content. repost
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,936 - Published: 12/24/2011
grafted reviews
Sam imprints on Emily. Leah gets mad. Sam accidentally rips Emily's face up. Leah is even more mad. Finally, Emily gets her revenge. dark, a little ooc, etc.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,121 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/2/2011 - Published: 1/1/2011 - Sam, Leah
writer's block reviews
Esme Evenson is stuck in a life she never dreamed of having, struggling with her greatest past time - writing. What happens when the whole wall she's built against the world comes tumbling down? Can a certain doctor fill the holes in her life? AU/AH
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 761 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 5/10/2010 - Esme, Carlisle
Cool Story, Bro reviews
Jasper and Edward are just bros, right? S-s-suh-slash. AU/AH E/J
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,815 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 5/3/2010 - Published: 8/27/2009 - Edward, Jasper - Complete
Handcuffed reviews
An Alice and Chief Swan o/s I wrote a long time ago.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,179 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/30/2009 - Alice, Charlie S. - Complete
Still Sleeping reviews
Bella loves her new life. She has everything she ever needed, and even more so. But what happens when she gets a harsh wake up call? Insanely long oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,601 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 7/24/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Playing God reviews
What is more monstrous than the man who picks who lives and who dies? Edward's rebellious nights and his return.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 684 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/11/2009 - Edward
watch me reviews
Now, we'll have eternity - Bella jumps off the cliff and no one's there to catch her. -new moon-
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 883 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/25/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Moon Blood reviews
A gentle suggestion of what Edward does when Bella's on the rag. /long little oneshot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,080 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/22/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete