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Joined 08-14-08, id: 1667249, Profile Updated: 12-21-08

First of all, I love Twilight...it is the best of the best.

Second, I wish there was a Edward Cullen (Eddie got game)...lol Kate

Well, I got those things out of t he way...so...I love writing stories...of course the story I wrote is the first.hehe :) Of course Im not as good as my bff. Your Welcome Kate. I have a dog named Dakota. A cat named Kitty which is a flame point siamese. Original isnt it? My other cat is a black cat named ...wait for it...KITTY!! She is NOT bad luck. I also have a ferret I love dearly named Dallas.

I have a secret Ive never said to nobody...I write music...lol. So, when Im done with writing one...I trow it away. GET RID OF THE EVIDENCE!!

Kate,I just thought of that...I stopped for a while...sry. Since I got hooked on Twilight I kinda stopped.

Well...Bye BYe for now.

LIVE LIFE LOVE!! ;)

9 Things I Hate About Everyone:

1.

People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2

People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3

When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4

When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it?! Do people do this? Who and where are they? I'm Gonna Kick their asses!

5

When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.

6

People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7.

When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8

When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest darn thing anyone ever does!! What the fuck can you do that's longer?

9

When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

Find a guy whos calls you beautiful instead of hot,

Who calls you back when you hang up on him,

Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,

Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,

Who holds your hand in public and in front of his friends and family.

Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you.

If you think that describes Edward Cullen, copy it into your profile.


Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Choose--me or your life

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile


A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste.


The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism


1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Funny Stuff

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Friend's will always be like “well you deserve better” but best friends will be prank calling him saying “you will die in seven days”

Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.

EMO kids have cool hair.

EMO=Extravagantly Made Origami

BEARS=Butt Extremely Annoying Retard Scientists

I read New Moon and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD.

I read Eclipse and wanted to smack Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD. Then Bella did it for me. “Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.”

“Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away from them and you have their shoes.”

Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it.

Why is Donkey Kong called “DONKEY” Kong if he’s a monkey?

If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from
strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?

Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door...

No, I don’t have PMS. I just really hate you.

My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it’s gone.

Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go.

“Hey guess who this is? You guessed it. Guess what you have to do now? You
guessed it. Guess what’s next? You guessed it...”

“Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.”

“An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.”

Life isn’t passing me by, it’s trying to run me over.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.

Did you know Sarcasm is your body’s natural defense against stupidity?

Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hate that.

Paper may beat rock, but cannon ball make big hole in paper.

The pen may be mightier than the sword, but my keyboard can crush your crummy pen!

Therapist = the/rapist... scary thought.

Don’t call me emo or I’ll cry big juicy tears of blood and pain and then I’ll die and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.

I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

Last night I looked up at the stars and matched each star to a reason I loved you. I was doing fine till I ran out of stars.

To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world.

Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question.

Some minds are like concrete; thoroughly mixed and permanently set.

The town was so dull that when the tide went out it refused to come back in.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

Tell the truth and run.

Don’t follow me, I’m lost too.

This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.

Definition of Your Mom: How to answer a question when you’re bored

Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.

I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do kill me?

I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.

It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.

So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun.

If at first you don’t succeed skydiving isn’t for you.

Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them.

Set sail in a general that way direction.

It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it?

I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later.

Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face?

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

Music is love in search of word.

Are children who act in rated ‘R’ movies allowed to see them?

Whose cruel idea was it for the words ‘lisp’ to have an‘s’ in it?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”?

Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken over there ... I’m gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt”?

Isn’t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?

Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?

“Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?”

Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’?

Why isn’t chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa
beans, and all beans are a vegetable?

Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

Why do people say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”? Why would someone get cake if they can’t eat it?

“When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade”

Assassination is an extreme form of censorship.

The sun has set, the moon has risen, today’s the day we get out of prison!!

You say I’m not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I’m not cold, I’m hot. I know I’m hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.

Don’t mess with me I’ve got a stick.

He said I love you, I sneezed and said sorry I’m allergic to bullshit.

I’ll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the internet.

You’re just jealous because we act retarded in public and people still love us!

Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!"
Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake."
Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!"

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkies, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n’ slide.

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don’t obsess! I think intensely.

Of course I’m talking to myself. Who else can I trust?

Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later.

One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons!

I’m so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

When I say LOL I’m not laughing out laud. I just have nothing better to say.

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing “I’m Off to See the Wizard” when sent to the Headmasters office.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

Stupid shiny Volvo owner.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

“When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.”

“Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”

“Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else”

“Real girls aren’t perfect, perfect girls aren’t real.”

“I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not.”

“What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy.”

“Guns don’t kill people. I do.”

“A good friend bails you out of jail. A great friend is sitting there next to you saying ‘Man, that was fun!’”

“If you can’t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.”

Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because ‘They’ve seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug.’ These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo.

A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.”
Suicide is Human’s way of saying “You can’t fire me- I quit!”

If ya can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.
If ya can’t join ‘em, bribe ‘em.
If ya can’t bribe ‘em, blackmail ‘em.
If ya can’t blackmail ‘em, kill ‘em.
If ya can’t kill ‘em, you’re screwed.

Unfortunately, you can’t die of a broken heart.

Heaven doesn’t want me, and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over.

“He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.”

“If you know me, chances are you hate me.”

“I’m the kind of person your parents warned you about.”

“Why are some girls so naive? He didn’t unbutton your shirt to see a better view of your heart.”

“When you’re down I may not be able to pick you back up but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you”

“Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words will hurt my inner child”

“Don’t judge a book by its cover or a person by their scars”

“It’s not until you’re broken that you know what you’re made of.”

“Tired of living and scared of dying.”

“It requires MORE courage to suffer than to die.”

“You said that you would die for me, you must live for me too”.

“To die is nothing but a long goodbye.”

“This isn’t just goodbye, this is I can’t stand you.”

“I hear your silence loud and clear.”

“The past is only the future with the lights on.”

“Shut up voices or I’ll poke you with a fork


Interesting things...

I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I’m a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude
I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth. (I get that i just like the colour black for clothing)
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer
I’m A GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress
I’m a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone’s ass
I’m a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant
I’m FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual
I’m a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian
I’m a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie
I’m INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs
I’m a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math
I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare
I'm PUNK, so I MUST cut my wrists
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist
I'm IRISH, so I MUST be a alcoholic
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz (Hey im blonde and there is no way im a ditz)
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore
I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy
I have A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS so I MUST be dating them all
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd
I love RENT so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST believe in heaven.

Stereotypes. Does anyone like them? NO! Does everyone do them anyway? YES! STOP STEREOTYPING!!

Did you know...
Kissing is healthy.
Bananas are good for period pain.
It's good to cry.
Chicken soup actually makes you feel better.
94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.
Lying is actually unhealthy.
You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.
It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.
89 percent of guys want you to make the first move.
It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.
Chocolate will make you feel better.
Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.
A good friend never judges.
A good foundation will hide a hickeys...not that you have any.
Boys aren't worth your tears.
We all love surprises.
Now...make a wish.
Wish REALLY hard!
WISH WISH WISH!
Your wish has just been recieved.
Copy and paste into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...your wish will be granted.

A True Boyfriend:When she walks away from you mad
Follow her When she stare's at your mouth
Kiss her When she pushes you or hit's you
Grab her and dont let go When she start's cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong When she ignore's you
Give her your attention When she pull's away
Pull her back When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful When you see her start crying
Just hold her and dont say a word When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared
Protect her When she lay's her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her When she steal's your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a nightWhen she tease's you
Tease her back and make her laugh When she doesnt answer for a long time
reassure her that everything is okay When she look's at you with doubt
Back yourself up When she say's that she like's you
she really does more than you could understand When she grab's at your hands
Hold her's and play with her fingers When she bump's into you
bump into her back and make her laugh When she tell's you a secret
keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes
dont look away until she does When she misses you
she's hurting inside When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it - Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.- Tease her and let her tease you back.- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.- Give her the world.- Let her wear your clothes.- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.- Let her know she's important.- Kiss her in the pouring rain.- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.
Text you.Guys post as: "i'd be this boyfriend."
Girls post as: "A true boyfriend " or " what a boyfriend should do"

Two women friends had
gone for a girl's night out. Both were very faithful and loving
wives,
however, they had gotten over-enthusiastic on the Bacardi Breezers.

Incredibly drunk and
walking home, they needed to pee, so they stopped in the cemetery.
One
of them had nothing to wipe with so she thought she would take off
her panties
and use them. Her friend however was wearing a rather expensive pair
of
panties and did not want to ruin them. She was lucky enough to squat
down next to a grave that had a wreath with a ribbon on it, so she
decided to
wipe with that. After the girls did their business, they proceeded
to go
home.
The next day one of the
woman's husband was concerned that his normally sweet and innocent
wife was
still in bed hung over, so he
phoned the other husband and said:
"These
girl nights have got to stop! I'm starting to suspect the worst.
My wife came home with no panties!!"
"That's nothing" said
the other husband "Mind came back with a card stuck to her ass that
said... .. ... ... ... ...
"From all of us at the
Fire Station. We'll never forget
you." (HAHAHAHAHA!)

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already made fist and say, "oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you asshole!"

This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination. SUPPORT THE FRICKEN BUNNY!!

A sad little story I saw on somebody else's profile:

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

>He told his friends that it was cool,

>And when he pulled the trigger back,

>It shot with a great, huge crack.

>Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

>I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

>When I went to school that day,

>I never said good-bye.

>I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

>When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

>And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

>Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

>And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

>And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

>And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

>And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

>Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

>Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

>And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

>Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

>But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

>And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

>I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

>Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

>But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

>When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

>please listen to me if you would,

>I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

>I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

>I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

>I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

>But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

>Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date.

>I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

>And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

Let's flip a coin-heads we'll be together, tails we flip again.

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over. But i shall run it over and live forever!MWAHAHAHA!)

Don't frown, even when you’re sad, someone could be falling in love with your smile.

You have to have darkness for a dawn to come.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.( 100 agreeable)

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

Music is love in search of word.

Whose cruel idea was it for the words 'lisp' to have an 's' in it?

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.

Don’t mess with me I've got a stick ( YAY!)

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!( This should br on a shirt!)

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.( TWILIGHT IS REAL!)

Stupid shiny Volvo owner.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it."

"When live hands you lemons, throw them back and ask for the Cullen Men!"

If you believe that preps travel in packs then place this on your profile.

Come join the dark side. (We have Edward Cullen) ( all i heard was edward cullen.:)

If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving.

"Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it."

"Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else"

"Real girls aren't perfect, perfect girls aren't real."

My favorite word is sarcasm.

Guys should be like Edward-rich,strong,and hot

Guys should be like lattes-rich,strong,and hot

...does this mean Edward is like a latte? ( I want myself a latte)

It's a matter of life after death-now that he's dead, I have a life

Everyone has a wild side-me and my friends just prefer to make them public

I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh the fun I will have( haha!)

Oops, I appear to have fallen on your lips.

Note to Self: Normal is just a setting on washing machines.

Why are the Force and ductape the same?-Both have a light and dark side and hold the universe together.

Somebody needs a Happy Meal.

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

News from the file marked "DUH"

Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers.

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

I would be more scared if you were aiming for the person next to me

Do not use an axe to kill a fly on your friends' head.

He Said:

I don't know why you wear a bra, you have nothing to put in it.

She Said:

You wear pants don't you?( ooooooh! BURNED!)

Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn

YOUTUBE myspace and I'll Google your YAHOO

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again

Behind every bitch there's a guy that made her that way

My heart is not a playground

I find "good morning" a contradiction of terms

Did you just call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement.

I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse

P.S I never changed, I just got tired of pretending I was happy.

Edward Cullen I love you! Oops! Did I say that out laud?

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide. ( And everyone else is inside while i have a hell of a time in the rain.)

Be a loser! Because being cool is soo overrated!(Exactly!)

Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepare to shatter.

If annoyed further, I shall spork your eyes out.

If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you.

Twilight: because we all secretly own two copies.

Love can come in many different colors.

All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.(I hear ya.)

Did no one come to save me just because they missed me?

We fall for stupid boys we make lots of dumb mistakes we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls, we're really good at one thing, staying strong.

"I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not."

"Why is it that people are fine with everyone having a different job or going to a different school, but if you say you follow a different religion, you are weird?"

"What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy."

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

I'm the kind of who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened...yesterday.( I always laugh in science and everyone thinks i am a freak because of it! Oh well they are all bitches anyway!)

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

Having the love of your life say "We can still be friends" is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

When people don't laugh at our jokes, we don't think of it as a 'You had to be there' type of thing, but a 'You have to be mentally retarded like us' type of thing.

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through highschool/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Get angry at you for calling them late in the night

BEST FRIENDS: Ask why it took so long for you to call

FRIENDS: Wonder about your love life

BEST FRINDS: Could blackmail you with it

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shittttt!!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder. ( Mie and my friends melissas friedship. we always humiliate each other)

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse

I often break out with random dance moves( sTORY TIME yay!! K I was listeng 2 my ipod and reading when i suddenlt started dancing.)

I hear voices, and they don't like you. ( My voice i usually hear always hates the peeps i hate. Voice( Seriously saying this : Yep!)

You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.( I NEVER tell any one but if i did they would call me freak and be jealous,)

I don't want no Fanfiction, all I want is bubblegum, bazooka zooka bubblegum! I got fanfiction and bubblegum!HA!)

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely. ( ME WITH TWILIGHT!!)

You shouldn't say "I love you." unless you mean it. But if you do mean it, you should say it often... people forget.

You know your in love when the hardest thing to do is say goodbye.

If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you.( I Love this one!)

My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems. ( Pssh.. Imagainary friends are overrated, voices are al the rage.)

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you. ( Sigh i hear yah.)

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!( sO ME)

I think you're breaking my Gay-dar ( aLL THE BOYS IN MY GRADE ARE JUST LIKE THIS I KNOW SCARY!)

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?( I will because i would have taken over the world! Voice: You are crazy. Me: Shut up, Voice: No. Me I shall hit you with an imaganary hammer! Voice: You are stupid. )

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again ( umm... so like me it is scary! Stalker!)

Behind every bitch there's a guy that made her that way ( Or they are just born bitches.)

My heart is not a playground. ( Its an organ. Not the instrument though that would be pretty cool.)

And God(CARLISLE) said "Let there be Edward,"...and it was goooooooooooood ( you have no idea. - happy sigh-)

I find "good morning" a contradiction of terms ( Iam so with you there)

Don't call me emo or I'll cry big juicy tears of blood and pain and then I'll die and it will be ALL YOUR FAULT ( I aid something like this to agirl who called me emo and she ran away from me so i followed her, she called me a freak and i said i would give her a 5 second head start she asked for what and i said to run away before your plastic nose is broken, bitch , she ran into the bathroom and locked the door. Me and my friends were laughing so hard! K i'll shut up now)

We're on a bridge CCHHAARRLLIIEE.

We are going to Candy Mountain Cchhaarrlliiee! A land of sweets and joy... and joyness.

Oh god! They took my freaking kidney!( AT least they didn't take your heart. Its an organ.)

It's a Leoplurodon Cchhaarrlliiee. A magical Leoplurodon.

Shun the nonbeliever. SSHHUUNN!! SSHHUUNNN

ween a girl and her boyfriend:

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: no

Girl: Do you think I'm pretty

Boy: no

Girl: which would you chose me or you life?

Boy: my life

Girl: If I were to walk away would you cry?

Boy: no

Girl: I heard enough

as she turns to walk away her boyfriend grabs her and says:

I don't like you, I love you. You're not pretty, you're beautiful. I would chose my life because you ARE my life and if you would walk away i wouldn't cry i would DIE!

Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

Bella Swan: Clumsier than you since 1989

Sayings:

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

you know its going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

it's always the last place you look. well dur!! why would i keep looking after i found it smartness!!

what happenswhen you get scared half to death twice?


Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this.

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs!!( that is so true!)

ATV is Addicted To Vampires

Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepare to shatter.( NO my organ is broken!)

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

AN apple a day keeps the doctor away, if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit(CARLISLE!).

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.

When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back!( Or your mind was being cruel!)

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.( I brought this up in science and my teacher and i were fighting about it.))

Last night I was laying in bed, looking up at the stars in the sky and I said to myself "Where the heck is the ceiling?!"

If you think this next thing is incredibly cute and sweet, copy and paste it onto your profile.

Bella: Do I ever cross your mind?

Edward: No

Bella: Do you like me?

Edward: No

Bella: Do you want me?

Edward: No

Bella: Would you cry if I left?

Edward: No

Bella: Would you live for me?

Edward: No

Bella: Would you do anything for me?

Edward: No

Bella: Choose--me or your life

Edward: My life

Bella runs away in shock and pain and Edward runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

Now isn;t that the cutest thing you've ever read! So like Bella and Edward


These are some of my favorite quotes from the Twilight series.

"Fine! Do! I can't wait to see what Edward does to you! I hope he snaps your neck, you pushy, obnoxious, moronic, DOG!"

~Bella Swan

This is part of Breaking Dawn, it's just a set of quotes, so no SPOILERS. This set is a very small conversation.

'' Why am I covered in feathers? '' ~ Bella Cullen

'' I bit a pillow, or two, that's not what I'm talking about. '' ~ Edward Cullen

'' You, ... bit a pillow? Why? '' ~ Bella Cullen

Okay! End very small convo. More quotes! YAY!

'' Look after my heart, I left it with you. ''

~ Edward Cullen

'' The pillows all appear to have survived. ''

~ Bella Cullen

'' But I wouldn't use the word beautiful. Not with you standing here in comparison. ''

~ Edward Cullen

'' That was quite graceful-even for a vampire. ''

~ Edward Cullen

'' You stupid mutt! How could you? My baby! ''

~ Bella Cullen

'' I've held her all of onetime, and already you think you have some moronic wolfy claim to her!? She's mine! ''

~ Bella Cullen

'' You nicknamed my daughter after the Loch Ness Monster?! ''

~ Bella Cullen

This isn't exactly a quote, but a preface.

Life sucks, and then you die. Yeah, I should be so lucky.

~ Jacob Black; Preface from Breaking Dawn

There are people in Africa that can't afford sarcasm, and yet, you abuse it.

Being mature is overrated.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I see regular people!

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall downstairs

There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is full.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

I have more fictional boyfriends than you do. Beat that!

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

I believe you should live each day as if it is your last, which is why I don't have any clean laundry because, come on, who wants to wash clothes on the last day of their life?

As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver

Make a man a fire, keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire, keep him warm for life

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world wonder how you did it.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk

I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth

I've got A.D.D and magic markers, oh the thrills I will have! ( I don't really have ADD )

Life is like a pack of gum... I've yet to figure out why.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

You call me a B well a B is a female dog. A dog barks. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. Nature is beautiful. So thanks for the compliment :D

I'm not random, i just have many tho- OH A SQUIRREL! ( Ha Ha Kate! )

Elmo knows where you live! ( Ha Ha Kate! )


You know you live in 2007 (2008) when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screen name or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Funny isn't it!


If you are completely in love with Edward Cullen like me, copy and paste this profile.

If you think Edward Cullen is hot, copy and paste this onto your profile

If your profile is long like mine, copy and paste this on your profile to make it longer!

If you went to sleep at around 2 am or later reading the Twilight books, copy and paste this onto your profile.

My best friend is insanely in love with Edward, if you have an insane Edward loving friend, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are absolutely in love with Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever just burst into song in a public place, copy and paste this on your profile( P.S. I have done that. )

The story behind that one is when I was walking around Camp O ( Camp Ondessonk, the best place on the face of this earth! ) I was with my best friend in the whole wide world, and we were probably the loudest people at camp ( and the most fun! ). We were laughing and then we got really quiet, I was so hyper, that I just burst out into the song ' Every Time we Touch' the radio version by Cassanda, and then my friend stared to sing with me! We were so loud, people stared to stare at us! And we didn't care because nobody knew us anyway! So yeah! If you've ever been to Camp Ondessonk, and had an amazing time, YOUR SO COOL, LIKE ME!

If you cried at least once in every Twilight book, copy and paste this on your profile.

Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! If you believe in God put this in your profile

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot.If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the fun of it, copy this into your profile

96 percent of teens won't stand up for God. Put this on your page if you're one of the 4 percent who will.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombia and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath, add this if you are part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off.

Things that are just totally me, ( if you haven't caught this from the rest of my profile, your blind, I'M CRAZY AND LOVING IT! )

I'm the kind of girl who would fall flat on my face, get up, laugh my head off, and say " That was fun! "

I'm the kind of girl who's really smart on the outside, but when you get to know me, I'm the craziest, most insanly insane girl you will ever meet in your life. ( And my Besties have agreed on that! In a good way! I think! )

I'm the kind of girl who hurts people physically, with out knowing I do it.

Backround on that one: I was at gym class with my friends and we were all standing around talking. Well someone made me laugh really hard, and I didn't know my best friend was behind me, so when I threw my arms back, I smacked my best friend in the face! I felt sooooo bad!

I'm the kind of girl who tries to slam a revolving door. And then gets hit by it on it's way back around.

I'm the kind of girl, if with my best friend in the entire world, we will say this all the time, '' We know we're weird, but we make weird cool. '' or '' We know we're dorks, but we love it!

I'm the kind of girl who bursts out laughing in the middle of silence because of something that happened...yesterday


Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

This is true!


A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love


FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit!

Tell me thats not funny!!


Oh so cute! Bunny!

Copy the bunny to your profile to help him achieve world domination, and
come join the dark side, we've got cookies.

COME TO MY PARTY!

THE TIGHTEST PARTY IN THE WORLD!
there will b a DJ , im throwing a party... every 1 is invited!

so every1 come. but read the rest of this bulliten.

Come Kick it at The Biggest Party Ever.

DETAILS BELOW..

Special Guest: Jesus Christ, God The Father,
Featuring DJ Holy Spirit.

When: When you enter the Gates of Heaven

Where: Kingdom of Heaven

How: Just Ask

Why: Because God Loves You!

... Come As You Are! Bring Nothing but Your Heart and Soul.

98 OF TEENS WON'T STAND UP FOR GOD...

REPOST THIS iF YOU'RE ONE OF THE 2 WHO WILL.

Jesus said, "If you deny me in front of your friends, I will deny
you in front of my Father."

repost as COME TO MY PARTY!

IF YOU THINK THIS IS SAD OR A GOOD SHORT STORY,

COPY AND PASTE TO YOUR PROFILE

(AND GIVE CREDIT TO PKMNMASTER-DAVID)

4 YEARS OLD

My first day of preschool, I meet you.

We're the best of friends.

We do everything together.

I wouldn't think that would ever change.

6 YEARS OLD

We have less time to play.

1st grade takes up to much time.

But, we've made new friends too.

8 YEARS OLD

3rd Grade,

you start to hang out with friends

that I don't like.

It bugs me, that I could lose you

as a friend.

10 YEARS OLD

You and my mortal enemies

play online RPGs, like Runescape.

I'm not intrested in them,

so I reside with FanFiction.Net

12 YEARS OLD

I can't control my anger,

I throw enemies to the ground

and I almost got suspension.

I hope I never have to throw you down.

14 YEARS OLD

High School,

I haven't seen you in like forever.

You're probably hanging out

with my rivals.

I want to see you soon.

16 YEARS OLD

I've always seen you with my enemies.

You start to give in

to peer pressure.

I see you drink and smoke.

18 YEARS OLD

Senior Year,

You had been pressured too much,

you had gotten really drunk.

You were driving your friends to a night club.

I was driving home, when...

CRASH!!

ONE DAY LATER...

I look down at the Earth underneath the clouds.

I wish I could've gotten my dipolma at graduation.

I wish you were here.

I know you will never read this, but if you were

here, you wouldn't be that 18-year-old before the crash.

You would be that 4-year-old that I met on the first day of preschool...

These people are such, well ... let's just say, these are the people that handle these appliances/food/whatever.

In Honor of Stupid People

On a Sears hairdryer
Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

On a bag of Fritos
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap
Directions: Use like regular soap
(And that would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners
Serving suggestion: Defrost
(But, it's just a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom)
Do not turn upside down
( To late! You lose! )

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
Product will be hot after heating
( No really? I totally thought it would, like, cold. But that's just me )

On packaging for a Rowena iron
Do not iron clothes on body
( But wouldn't that save more time? )

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine
Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid
Warning: May cause drowsiness
( One would hope, since it does say SLEEP aid )

On most brands of Christmas lights
For indoor or outdoor use only
( As apposed to ... ? )

On a Japanese food processor
Not to be used for the other use
( Thanks, now I'm curious )

On Sainsbury's peanuts
Warning: contains nuts
( Thanks Captain Obvious )

On an American Airlines packet of nuts
Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts
(
What else am I supposed to do with 'em? )

On a child's Superman costume
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly
( There you go buddy! Ruin the childhood dream! One of these days it will! ... Maybe ... )

On a Swedish chainsaw
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals
( Raise you hand if you've done that. )

I am now scared for this world

Did you know...
Kissing is healthy.
Bananas are good for period pain.
It's good to cry.
Chicken soup actually makes you feel better.
94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.
Lying is actually unhealthy.
You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.
It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.
89 percent of guys want you to make the first move.
It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.
Chocolate will make you feel better.
Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.
A good friend never judges.
A good foundation will hide a hickeys...not that you have any.
Boys aren't worth your tears.
We all love surprises.
Now...make a wish.
Wish REALLY hard!
WISH WISH WISH!
Your wish has just been recieved.
Copy and paste into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...your wish will be granted.