Nikik
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Joined 08-20-08, id: 1673254, Profile Updated: 07-14-09
Author has written 8 stories for Maximum Ride, Fruits Basket, and Twilight.

Hi I'm Nikki!

stuff about me:

Hey I'm Nikki, my user name is Nikik. I have a lot of awesome freinds and stuff at school and they usually give me ideas about my stories and stuff.

My favorite color is green because no one else liked it now everyone likes it and that sucks.

My pet peeves:

-when people say LOL(and they just say it because they have nothing better to say and they dont LAUGH)

-When some one asks you to get them somthing and when you come back they already have it.

-Hannah Montana and everything about her. and her show because seriously? if shes so famous then why don't people wonder why she disapears of the face of the earth while she's Miley

-That really pretty green M&M

Favorite books:

Maximum Ride

Southern vamp novels

Twilight

Tamora Peirce novels

Sammy Keyes

Favorite Manga books:

Fruits basket

Rave master

Fairy Tail

Favorite pairings:

Fang/Max

Sookie/Eric

Leah/Jacob

Bella/Edward

Tohru/Kyo

Haru/Elie

Iggy/Ella

I found this interesting article in one the authors here in FF. Author named: Second daughter of Eve.

REALLY SAD STORY!!

HOW COULD YOU? - By Jim Willis, 2001 When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub. My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect. We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day. Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love. She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" -- still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy. Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love." As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway. There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog ," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf. Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family, " but there was a time when I was your only family. I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life. You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the 2 nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago & made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads & asked "How could you?" They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me. When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured "How could you?" Perhaps because she understood my dog speak, she said "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself -- a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place. And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her . It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

My concern about this issue:
I don't own any pets at all at home because of health safety from young and doctor's order to not have any fur or animals at home. So, I might not full understand how they feel but this really brought tears to me eyes. This is a very interesting issue and more and more animals are dying in shelter homes. Due to what? The fact that the owner has moved on and stuffs. Please people, animals are living beings as well. Treat them well like a member of the family. Even if the apartment do not allow animals and such, please, try and try to find one. Never ever abandon your pets. The animals shelter cannot accommodate so many animals as well as space are limited. So, when they are low on budget and stuffs, they have to marginalized the animals. I'm a business student and I know what company needs to do when they are low on budget. They cut down and marginalized things that cannot be used. Like animals, if the animals haven't been adopted for a long time, it means that their time has come. So, please people. Take care of your animal and do not leave them alone to the shelter place. Please... post this on and spread the word about this issue. I know that this will not change anything but at least we must try to save people and their pets. Saving one life means saving another life in the process.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile.

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend than copy this to your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile

If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.

If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

"I'm bringing sexy back..." Copy and paste this into your profile if you never even knew sexy was gone.


You know you live in 2008 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screen name or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that.(Oh you know you did!)

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, EdwardAddict, Supergirrl, Elemental-ANimal, Mother Nature's Daughter, Hikuya, Briar Elwood, Megan Cooper, xxTunstall Chickxx, PoisionedRoses, Gabby510,twilightobsessedOECD, Nikik

Twilight stuff

If you truly believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen), copy this into your profile.

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile. Only a vegetarian, like the Cullens! I don't want to eat people!

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volterra" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile. (And multiple other Twilight words. Volturi, Carlisle, Irina, etc.) (note: none of those Twilight words showed up as misspelled.)

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

I read New Moon and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD

You know you're obsessed with Twilight when:
You start going up to random people to tell them you want an Edward!
You think your next-door neighbor looks like a vampire, or he really is a vampire.
You try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them.
You've read Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse at least 5 times each!
You check on this site 5 times (or more) a day to see if there's any new Twilight news.
You think your best friend's crazy for not reading Twilight, New Moon, and/or Eclipse.
When you see a box labeled "Forks", you think there's something imported from Forks, Washington in there.
Twilight has ruined any and all future reading for you.
You use Twilight for every single school project that pops up.
You break up with your boyfriend because he doesn't glitter in the sun like Edward.
You have nothing to do, so you go to www.stepheniemeyer.com and read everything on the site twice. And then go to the Lexicon and do the same thing.
You promise your friend that if he can find you an Edward, you'll give him the answers to your homework for the rest of your school-life.
You plan on naming your children after characters in any of the books in the Twilight series.
You walk around school looking for pale-skinned, inhumanly beautiful classmates with red or gold eyes.
You see a shadow, think it's Edward, and start talking to it.

TWILIGHT LESSONS:

1. You can enjoy the banquet while resisting the wine.
2. The future is not set in stone.
3. Men are crabby when they're hungry.
4. Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear.
5. True love knows no boundaries.
6. Some people are just danger magnets.
7. Even eternal enemies can work together to save something they love.
8. Forget the fangs - real vampires sparkle!
9. Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10. Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes.
11. Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day.
12. Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13. Family is about more than just blood.
14. What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15. Losing your temper can be hair-raising.
16. "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17. Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18. There are exceptions to every rule.
19. Always verify bad news before doing something stupid.
20. Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21. Love means being willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's.
22. Cold hands = Warm heart.
23. Not breathing is uncomfortable.
24. Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair.
25. Romeo was an idiot.
26. Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27. Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28. Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29. Space heaters can be very annoying.
30. Love can make even the most miserable places paradise

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you start dancing in Wal-Mart to its cheesy music. Crazy is when u laugh uncontrollably at your own jokes. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favourite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumb war with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favourite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny. Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!". Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence. Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it. Crazy is when you memorized every single line of the Kingdom Hearts series. Crazy is when your so obsessed with Roxas (KH 2) that you bang on the T.V. every now and then to see if he will come out .(Yes this is the real Sam from Storms; Crossover Mania LOL) I LOVE ROXAS! Crazy is when you are going through this as a checklist. Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random moments. Crazy is when you eat twenty pixie sticks in one day. Crazy is when you’re crazy. Crazy is when start talking nonsense everyday during gym. Crazy is when you convince your friends you’re 'high' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown. Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them. When you go to look at cats and can't stop. Crazy is when your binder of French vocabulary words gets so big and thick that you title it Harry Potter and the French Vocabulary. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what are you doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob fest, and start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say some completely random thing, like," Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumb-war with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings and tape them on your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you giggle upon finding out that Edward has gone to the Volturi, because it was stupid for him to take second hand information. Crazy is when you wish your boyfriend's name was Jasper or Edward. Crazy is when you sit for hours on end talking about Edward with your friends. Crazy is when one of your friends come up to you and says "He is so completely gorgeous!" and you know exactly who their talking about because your brain is no longer set on English, but Twilight. Crazy is when all your friends are scared of you because you are so hyper. Crazy is when you threaten your friends with a free trip to Italy and a vampire mafia if they don't read Twilight. Crazy is when your friend calls you crazy, you tear up a little and tell them that was the nicest thing they ever said to you. You doze off playing your virtual ipod in ur head and are snapped out of it when a friend asks u why your wiggling to what seems like a beat. Crazy is when you stand on the street corner dressed in snazzy costumes and sing the Lollipop song at the top of your lungs while waving at random cars as they drive by. Crazy is when you respond to that little voice in the back of your head. Crazy is when you have a conversation with an inanimate object. Crazy is when you have dreams of ballet shoes taking over the world and possessed sheep attacking you. Crazy is when you have a dream about someone taking over the world with cookie dough, and talk about it for two years. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!

- Stupidity killed the cat. Curiousity was framed.

- Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them.
- I used all my sick days, so I called in dead...

- They say, "Guns dont kill people, people kill people.' Well, I think the gun helps, because if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG" I dont think you'd kill too many people. So, if guns kill people, can I blame misspelled words on my pencil?

- Yeah, I'm a loser. But the coolest loser you'll ever meet.
- Save the Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

- - No, I won't go to Hell! It has a restraining order against me.
- You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

- When Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because, I mean, really? Who likes lemons?
- When Life gives you lemons, make grape juice, and sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.

- I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

- Life isnt passing me by; it's trying to run me over.

- Smile; it makes people wonder what you're up to.
- I talk to myself because my answers are the only ones I accept!

- Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap... you decide.
- I live in my own little world. But it's okay, they know me there.

- The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide.
- Your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend.
- Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many and 'tics' as in the bloodsucking creatures?
- You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
- Everything in this room is eatable, even I'm eatable. But that is called 'cannibalism' my dear children, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.
- I used to be normal... until I met those freaks I call my friends.

I got you a present; it's a CD. I hope you haven't got it, because I don't have a receipt... and I didn't exactly buy it...
- The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!

- When in doubt, make up words!

-Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.
- If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you!

- If you're gonna be two-faced, sweetie at least make one of them pretty.
- All work and no play means you will die in seven days... dun dun duuun.

- I run with scissors; it makes me feel dangerous.- Don't worry about the world coming to an end today; its already tomorrow in Australia.

- Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

- You say I'm not cool. Cool is just another word for cold. If I'm not cold then I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thank You for embracing it!

- Come to the Dark Side... we have cookies!
- One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
- Give a person a fish and feed them for a day, teach them how to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks!
- Before you critisize someone walk a mile in their shoes, that way you'll be a mile away and have their shoes!
- The statistics of insanty is that 1 of every 4 people have a mental illness. Look at your three best friends, if they're okay, then it's you.

- When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

- A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work. - Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
- There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...

- Music is like candy: You throw away the (w)rappers.
- The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not. - Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.
- What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question... I wonder...

- My mind works like lightning... one brilliant flash and it's gone.
- Do not take life too seriously; no one gets out alive.

- If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

- Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
- Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon. - I was going to take over the world, but something sparkly distracted me.
- Don't hit kids. No, seriously, they have guns now.

- People like you are the reason why we have middle fingers.

- WARNING: Children left unattended will be sold to the circus.
- If your heart was really broken you'd be dead, so shut up.

- Yes, I do use my hairbrush as a microphone and dance around in my underwear. Thank you very much.
- I don't have a dog... I eat my own homework. I'm not random, I just have many tho- OOH, LOOK! A SQUIRREL!
- Please: Don't throw your cigarette butt's on the floor, the cockroaches are getting cancer

Whose cruel idea was it for the words ‘lisp’ to have an‘s’ in it?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first?

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”?

Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken over there ... I’m gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt”?

Isn’t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?

Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?

“Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?”

Why isn’t chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa
beans, and all beans are a vegetable?

Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

Why do people say, “You can’t have your cake and eat it too”? Why would someone get cake if they can’t eat it?

“When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade”

Assassination is an extreme form of censorship.

The sun has set, the moon has risen, today’s the day we get out of prison!!

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.

Don’t mess with me I’ve got a stick.

He said I love you, I sneezed and said sorry I’m allergic to bullshit.

I’ll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the internet.

You’re just jealous because we act retarded in public and people still love us!

Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!"
Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake."
Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!"

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

Boys are like slinkies, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don’t obsess! I think intensely.

Of course I’m talking to myself. Who else can I trust?

Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later.

One way to figure out how things work, push all the buttons!

I’m so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

When I say LOL I’m not laughing out laud. I just have nothing better to say.

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing “I’m Off to See the Wizard” when sent to the Headmasters office.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

All the good ones are gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

Stupid shiny Volvo owner.

The greatest challenge in life is to find someone who knows all your flaws, differences, and mistakes, and yet still sees the best in you.

“Those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”

“Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else”

“Real girls aren’t perfect, perfect girls aren’t real.”

“I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not.”

“What is easy is not always right, and what is right is not always easy.”

“Guns don’t kill people. I do.”

“If you can’t see the bright side of life, polish the dull side.”

Bush gave an interview and he said people will vote for him because ‘They’ve seen me weep, they’ve seen me laugh, and they’ve seen me hug.’ These are the same qualifications for a Tickle Me Elmo.

A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Death is God’s way of saying “You’re fired.”
Suicide is Human’s way of saying “You can’t fire me- I quit!”

If ya can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.
If ya can’t join ‘em, bribe ‘em.
If ya can’t bribe ‘em, blackmail ‘em.
If ya can’t blackmail ‘em, kill ‘em.
If ya can’t kill ‘em, you’re screwed.

Unfortunately, you can’t die of a broken heart.

Heaven doesn’t want me, and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over.

“He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.”

“If you know me, chances are you hate me.”

“I’m the kind of person your parents warned you about.”

“Why are some girls so naive? He didn’t unbutton your shirt to see a better view of your heart.”

“When you’re down I may not be able to pick you back up but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you”

“Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but words will hurt my inner child”

“Don’t judge a book by its cover or a person by their scars”

“It’s not until you’re broken that you know what you’re made of.”

“Tired of living and scared of dying.”

“It requires MORE courage to suffer than to die.”

“You said that you would die for me, you must live for me too”.

“To die is nothing but a long goodbye.”

“This isn’t just goodbye, this is I can’t stand you.”

“I hear your silence loud and clear.”

“The past is only the future with the lights on.”

“Shut up voices or I’ll poke you with a fork

Stand up. Close your eyes. Spin around three times. Stop. Open your eyes.What's the first thing you see? a floor (i fell down)

Definition of homework: Some form of crude mind control still used in some primitive areas.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.

I’m not afraid of Death, what’s it gonna do kill me?

I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.

It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.

So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun.

If at first you don’t succeed skydiving isn’t for you.

Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them.

Set sail in a general that way direction.

It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I’ve found it?

I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later.

Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face?

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound as they go by.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

Music is love in search of word.

Are children who act in rated ‘R’ movies allowed to see them?

IF YOU LOVE EDWARD CULLEN, COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE AND SCREAM! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are absolutly in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional charater Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're a proud stalker and obsessed love-struck fan-girl of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, copy this into your profile.

If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever fallen down the stairs and laughed because it's something Bella would do and then cried because Edward wasn't there to catch you, copy and paste this in to your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your butt off

If you have ever tried blocking your thoughts about how georgous Edward Cullen is because you don't want said georgous Edward Cullen to hear, copy and paste this into your profile

One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem: my husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"

"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."

In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.

"Jesus!" Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.

"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.

"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.

"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones had winked off again. However, this time, the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.

The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"

Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!

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Emmett's 16 fun things to do in an elevator! by MyBoyfriendEdwardSparkles reviews
Emmett discovers a list so magical, he beleives it was created by unicorns! He must complete this list! 16 days, 16 fun things to do in an elevator. What could go wrong?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 31 - Words: 31,469 - Reviews: 856 - Favs: 317 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 5/5/2010 - Published: 4/19/2009 - Emmett - Complete
Flash by Forever in Your Heart reviews
Did...Did Leah Clearwater just FLASH me?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,381 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 12/14/2009 - Published: 4/2/2009 - Jacob, Leah - Complete
Last Light by X5 - 452 reviews
Sequel to Rising Sun. Leah's story ended with Rising Sun, but the pups story is only just beginning. They are all grown up, but they still have a long way to go.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 86,463 - Reviews: 495 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 8/2/2009 - Published: 4/14/2009 - Leah, Jacob - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Abnormal reviews
Set after breaking dawn. What happens with Jacob now that he has imprinted? What about Leah? And the cullens? The normal pairings. LeahxJake Read and Review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 6,075 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 11/19/2009 - Published: 2/11/2009 - Leah
Alone reviews
They are both alone, they never imprinted. Embry/Leah Fic. Read and Review
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,807 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 8/10/2009 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Leah
Maximum Twilight reviews
Maximum ride and twilight crossover. fax. other pairings.t for safety.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 12 - Words: 7,285 - Reviews: 261 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 12/21/2008 - Published: 9/17/2008 - Max, Fang
Maximum school reviews
Fax Iggyxoc Nudgexoc the flock goes to school.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,182 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 12/10/2008 - Published: 12/2/2008 - Fang, Max
If everything goes as planned reviews
I need you guys to review or else I can't write this story. If you read the story inside you'll get it. R&R please!
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 136 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 12/10/2008
Ask Max reviews
summery inside. Reveiw. Fax if you want it.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 585 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 11/19/2008 - Published: 11/12/2008 - Max, Fang
Maximum Ride? reviews
somthing I've had on my mind for a while fax
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 114 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 8 - Published: 11/1/2008 - Fang, Max
The world is saved or is it reviews
The flock has finally saved the world. At least that is what they think. They live a normal life with the exception of some saving the world action. The flock might attend school.some Fax. rated t for safety.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 12 - Words: 6,888 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 9/17/2008 - Published: 8/28/2008