ht4eva
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Poll: What is your favorite Artemis Fowl ship? Vote Now!
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Joined 08-27-08, id: 1678696, Profile Updated: 07-17-10
Author has written 9 stories for Artemis Fowl, and Fullmetal Alchemist.

Hi! I'm Eva. HT extraordinaire! I love reading, writing, music, art, soccer, and swimming. I'm going to be a rescue pilot or fire fighter when I grow up. I want to be as brave and cool as Holly Short. I'm a tomboy. I hate math. I LOVE ARTEMIS FOWL! I LOVE THE LORD OF THE RINGS! I LOVE ENDER'S GAME!! Um...that's all. :)

Name: Evelyna Darkling Lily BLANK

Age:13

Ships I like:

Holly/Trouble (AF)

Holly/Juliet (AF)

Artemis/Minerva (AF)

Artemis/OC (Um...figure it out...AF, duh! :P)

Chix/Some guy...(Because Chix should be gay, and find the man of his dreams!)

Ships I DESPISE:

Artemis/Holly

Holly/Root

Chix/Holly

Trouble/ANYONE but Holly

Holly/ANYONE but Trouble (Unless it's Juliet)

Fullmetal Alchemist is my new thing! That's why I'm updating my beloved profile to include info on shipping preferences in Hiromu Arakawa's world! :D

Ships I LOOOOVVEEE!!:

Roy/Riza (Royai: MY FAVOURITE! ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE!!)

Ed/Winry (EdWin: my SECOND FAVOURITE! MY ABOSOLUTE SECOND FAVOURITE!!)

Al/May

Olivier/Buccaneer (I don't know why, it just works!)

Ships I despise:

Nothing really, except any of the people in " ships I love" being with anyone BUT the person I like them shipped with! sobs. SO SAD!

On another note, I have decided as of today that I don't WANT to be a rescue pilot or fire fighter when I grow up! (That lasted...(sarcastically)). Now I'm going to be an artist and writer. (Crosses arms) I STILL wanna be a pilot for fun though!! Soon I will be...Eventually...In about 5 years when I'm old enough...or longer because it costs a billion, gazzillion dollars to get lessons and a plane...(HYSTERICAL TEARS.) MY LIFE IS SO MISERABLE!! Audience: Rolls eyes. What audience? Why the invisible one reading over your shoulder, ready to take over your brain and turn you into a zombie on my command! Me: NOW BOYS! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHcoughcoughblarghchokegag!!

November 21st NOOOOOOOO!! WHY DID BUCCANEER DIE?! (Sorry, just in case you haven't read that chapter yet... :P) At least Riza is okay though! AND ROY'S THE FIFTH HUMAN SACRIFICE!! (Gleeful face at having just ruined the manga for anyone who hasn't read it all yet.) TOMORROW'S MY BIRTHDAY! FOR MY BIRTHDAY, I WOULD LIKE A TON OF HT AND ROYAI FICS! :D (But I probably won't get any... :'( )

That's all for now! Feel free to browse my profile and take anything funny to make your own already long profile even LONGER!

Dear Fellow Constituent:

The George W. Bush Presidential Library is now in the planning stages and accepting donations.

The Library will include:

1. The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction.

2. The Alberto Gonzales Room, where you won't be able to remember anything.

3. The Texas Air National Guard Room, where you don't even have to show up.

4. The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don't let you in.

5. The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don't let you out.

6. The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.

7. The National Debt Room, which is huge and has no ceiling.

8. The Tax Cut Room, with entry only to the wealthy.

9. The Economy Room, which is in the toilet.

10. The Iraq War Room. (After you complete your first
visit, they make you go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes
fifth visit.)

11. The Dick Cheney Room, in the famous undisclosed location, complete with shooting gallery.

12. The Environmental Conservation Room, still empty.

13. The Supreme Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.

14. The Airport Men's Room, where you can meet some of your favorite Republican Senators.

15. The Decider Room, complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.

The library will also include many famous Quotes by George W. Bush:

1. 'The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country.'

2. 'If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure.'

3. 'Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child.'

4. 'No senior citizen should ever have to choose between prescription drugs and medicine.'

5. 'I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change.'

6. 'One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'.'

7. 'Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.'

8. 'I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in the future.'

9. 'The future will be better tomorrow.'

10. 'We're going to have the best educated American people in the world.'

11. 'One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.' (during an education photo-op)

12. 'Illegitimacy is something we should talk about in terms of not having it.'

13. 'We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.'

14. 'It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.'

15. 'I stand by all the misstatements that I've made.'…George W. Bush to Sam Donaldson

If you ran up a down escalater copy this into your profile

If you love someone put their name in a circle not a heart, a heart can be broken but a circle goes on forever

DON'T WISH UPON, A STAR REACH FOR ONE.

Candles are romantic, but lightbulbs don't burn your house down!

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button

The road to success is always under construction

Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.

A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its shoes on.

A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

The Catholic Church is still very angry about "The Da Vinci Code” - they don’t like anything that makes more money in a weekend than they do

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.

Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.

Life's tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late.

Failing to plan is planning to fail.

In a mad world, only the mad are sane.

God made earth; he rested. God made man; he rested. Then god made women, since then, neither God nor Man have rested.

When I give a lecture, I accept that people look at their watches, but what I do not tolerate is when they look at it and raise it to their ear to find out if it stopped."

Yesterday, I decided to kill the most beautiful person in the world... then I realized it would be suicide.

I told your boyfriend he was gay, and he hit me with his purse.

As I was sitting there, wondering why frisbees get bigger as they get closer... it hit me.

Guys are like slinkys: useless, but fun to watch fall down stairs.

When life gives you lemons, stuff your bra.

A simple man eats with a simple spoon, someone took my simple spoon so I simply cannot eat.

We are the type of friends who get hit by parked cars.

I am the type of girl who bursts out in laughter because of something that happened yesterday.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you saying, "wasn't that fun?"

Someday my prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

I thought you were my knight in shining armor, but you turned out to be a loser in tinfoil. (or in foaly's case, a tinfoil hat :D)

Save the Earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.

I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure...

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, secilmis yazar, Holly Marie Fowl, ht4eva,

Fear knocked on the door. Faith answered it. No one was there.

Join the dark side; we have cookies.

Fun things to do when bored: Run to an empty register at WalMart and yell into the microphone, "Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger, will you please stop snogging in the tupperware aisle!

When life hands you lemons... ask for a refund.

Bad pickup line #138: So... you're a girl huh?

Everything here is eatable. Even I'm eatable, but that, my children, is called cannibalism, and is frowned upon in most countries. ~Willie Wonka

Questions that haunt me #841: Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?

Artemis Fowl away messages (from AFF site):

BRB. There’s a shimmering spot in the air behind my right shoulder. Uh oh...

I do not have the time for these foolish “chats.” I have fairy gold to steal.

At the risk of sounding clichéd, BRB.

I’m away. Leave me alone before Butler makes you.

Busy yelling at the waitress who offered me the children’s menu.

Away trying to capture the yet again escaped Opal Koboi.

I predict I will be back. Trust me, I haven’t been wrong yet.

Trying to prove that my bugs don’t have bugs.

Trapped in the Operation Booth. SOMEONE GET ME OUT!

Away making a sandwhich. It’s more difficult than it looks. ~Artemis Fowl

On Strike because nobody appreciates my extremely unique and helpful inventions.

I’m not here right now, but as Holly says, “I knew he’d be back. I knew it.”

“They accused me of murdering Julius. How can I stay? Don’t worry, old friend. I won’t be far away.”

“Busy. Currently kidnapping an elf.”

“Do not disturb. We have a serious situation above ground. First, I would like you all to stop all your yapping so I can hear myself think!”

“BRB. Off to grab some caviar you can’t believe the stuff they feed us in Bartleby’s.”

I’m away, but be warned, Foaly sees all.

CMDR ROOT. TRBLE BELOW. HAVN OVRRN BY GOBLINS. PLCE PLAZA SRROUNDED. CUDGEON + OPL KBOI BHND PLOT. NO WPONS OR CMMUNICATIONS. DNA CNONS CNTRLLED BY KBOI. I M TRPPED IN OP BTH. CNCL THNKS IM 2 BLM. IF ALIVE PLSE HLP. IF NOT, WRNG NMBR.

Everybody has a wild side; me and my friends just decide to show it in public.

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend laughs at you and trips you again.

You cry; I cry. You laugh; I laugh. You jump off a cliff; I laugh even harder.

Before you criticize some one, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away and you still have their shoes.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

If Fanfiction is to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you should be doing homework right now, copy this into your profile.

If you have every copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Its always in the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?

It’s not until you're broken that you know what you're made of.

if people shake their heads when they talk to you copy and paste this is your profile

If you run into inanimite objects...and then blame them for it copy and paste this in your profile

If you have multiple voices in your head put this in your profile

If you think people should be nicer and care for emos, so they can get their lives back on track put this in your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

If you've ever shouted "AT LAST! MY ARM IS COMPLETE AGAIN!" in a public place (like math class) while holding a pencil up to the light and imagining how shiny it would be if it were actually a razor, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientists' likings. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!!

If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile. Thinking it sucks is an understatement for me.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

ou could own a library with every book you have ever wanted to read and or liked/loved copy and past this on to your profile and add yourname to the list Italiangurlinmessedupworld, the epitome of randomness, Holly Marie Fowl,Stefanlover12, h/t4eva

Type your name with a cd case and DON'T look:h/y5rvs

Type your name with your knuckles: h/t4eva

Type your name with your nose:yhy/tt444eeeevvvvaaaaaa

Type your name with your elbow:hj/yttt4esdva

Type your name with your feet:eeeeeeeeehg///////ttttttt44ewvva

Type your name w/ a pen w/o looking:h/grfvx

Type your name with your pinky and don't look:h/t4eva

Type your name w/ your cell phone w/o looking:h./te34evsa

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. (And LOSE!) If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.0

If you believe that the reason the girls always kiss the guys first is that the guys are too scared that they'll be slapped, punched, hit, kicked or mindwiped, then please copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tried to walk through a wall, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever accidentally walked into a wall, copy and paste this into your profile.

If for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever misspelled your own name, paste this on your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been flamed, copy this into your profile. meanies!

If you're weird and you're proud of it post this into your profile!!

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

"Be nice to people. They outnumber you 5.5 billion (that number is bigger now, and it's steadily growing) to one." Anonymous

"Sympathy sees and says 'I'm sorry', compassion feels, and whispers 'I'll help.'" Anonymous.

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller

"I have been given so much. I have no time to ponder what has been denied." Helen Keller

"Pride gets no pleasure in having something, only having more of it than the next man." C.S. Lewis

"If I have made an appointment with you, I owe you punctuality; I have no right to throw away your time, if I do my own." Richard Cecil.

"The role of a writer is to say what we are unable to say."

You know when you live in 2008 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or Myspace

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends...

9.) ...and you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly. Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

Boys say that in everything they do, they can kick a girl's butt so bad that they cry. If you're a girl who kicks the boys' butts so bad they cry like girls, copy this into your profile and add your name. Moonstar of FireClan, Archer of Freedom, Savvyjewel , Stefanlover12, h/t4eva

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you've ever tried to go up a down escalator, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you've ever thrown a banana at somebody, copy and paste this into your profile!

Rock, Paper, Scissors

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating student as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, oh shit, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole."

:Your One and Only Wish
Do it one by one, don't look ahead!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex. ((Stone))

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow? ((Blue))

3. Your first initial? ((E))

4. Your month of birth? ((November))

5. Which color do you like more, black or white? ((Black))

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours. ((Charyl))

7. Your favorite number? ((6))

8. Do you like California or Florida more? ((California))

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more? ((Ocean))

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one). ((To marry Holly Short! :D...Not realistic, but it would be nice...))

Are you done?

If so, scroll down

(don't cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person. (NO! DX)

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you

love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are

down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to

blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you

fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but

the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life

changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your

soulmate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time

but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do

anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend. (Well, naturally, but I'd rather be with her then with STONE! D'X)

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!


--copy and paste--

()()
(0.0)

Copy the bunny to your presentation to help him achieve world domination, and come join the dark side. (We have cookies.)

SUPPORT THE BUNNY!! And you get MILK MINT MELTAWAYS!! (The best chocolate in creation!!)

And the bunny shall inherit the earth!! DAH DAH, DAH DAH, DAH DAH, DAH DAH DAH!

WE ARE THE PRIESTS

OF THE TEMPLES

OF SYRINX!

Etc...

-Rush 2112 (2112 Overture)

When life gives me lemons, I trip over them.


-When you love someone you can tell...when you're in love with someone, every one else can.

- i'm not lying...i'm writing fiction with my mouth - homer simpson

-BRB, I'm busy trying to jump off the roof with the kitchen broom.

If your heart was really broken...you'd be dead so shut up.

Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS

- What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
'Hold my purse.'

- You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'. -Homer Simpson

- Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.

- If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

-Stop world hunger! Eat the rich.

- The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

-Lead me not into temptation. I can find it myself.

-The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

-I'd rather be pissed off than pissed on.

- When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

-Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

- I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

- Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking

TOP TEN Excuses - If You Get Caught Sleeping At Your Desk At Work:

10. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

9. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to."

8. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the white-out. You probably got here just in time!"

7. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm."

6. "I was testing my keyboard for drool resistance."

5. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory toward people who practice Yoga?"

4. "Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

3. "The coffee machine is broken..."

2. "Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot..."

And the #1 excuse to say if you get caught sleeping at your desk.
1. " ... AMEN!"

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...

You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. Hmm, what would happen if it was sunny the day Bella got hit by the van? Oh, story idea!! Must get computer! (Me: ...Since when would I waste time writing such a boring fanfic...? x.x)

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')

After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then dissappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off. (once a key actually fell off!)

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You zone out even with other people.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

You're profile is REALLY long.

Your computer runs out of memory.

You can't stop writing!

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

I guess I'm an author. . .

ONE FOR THE GIRLS!

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing

~edwardsgirl3

There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel...just hope it's NOT a train!

If you don't like the way I drive, get off the sidewalk!

A tree never hits an automobile except in self-defense.

If the left side of your brain controls the right side of your body, then only left handed people are in their right mind. (... Yeah...about that...Not necessarily true in my case...But LEFTIES ROCK!!)

Only in America do we have drive up ATM's with braile on them.

If you're too open-minded your brains will fall out.

Anyone who says nothing's impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door.

You remind a teacher that she forgot to give homework.

What came first: the chicken or the egg? (drop it. Just drop it.)

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste;

paste this in your profile If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

My best friend is insane. If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, copy this into your profile!

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!

If you have ever started painting your nails and painted one hand, but then got distracted and never went back and finished the other one, put this is your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

98 of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2 that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Revenant666, darkflame1516, AirGirl Phantom, Agent of the Divine One, pointless people of Pluto, itachikakashi, xXxLuna-of-the-ChosenxXx, bubbleyum, Sakura90873, tomboy14, the Reading Maid, Kiya-san, Cha-chan-hyper, ht4eva,

If you love someone more than they know, put this in your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vise versa copy this into your profile

If you love cheese, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE NOW!

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're so obsessed with Artemis Fowl that it's not even FUNNY anymore, copy this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you're a devoted H/T shipper, PLEASE copy this into your profile! And add your name! ht4eva,

MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those

who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

15. The day you don't wash your hair is the day you meet a cute boy.

Sipping Vodka

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak.
After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, 'When I am worried about getting nervous On the
pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get
nervous, I take a sip.'
So next Sunday he took the Monsignor's advice.
At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.
He proceeded to talk up a storm.
Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on
the door:
1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.
2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and
the spook.
8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the sht out of him.
9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don't say he
was stoned off his ass.
10)We do not refer to the cross as the 'Big T.'
11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supper he said, 'take this and eat
it for it is my body.' He did not say ' Eat me'
12)The Virgin Mary is not called ' Mary with the Cherry,.
13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the
grub, Yeah God.
14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at ST.Peter's not a
peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
The Origination of this letter is unknown.

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, Arktos, Mei Fire, Happy-Hippy, MavisClone101, PerfectionIsInTheEyes, LLAMAS WILL RULE THE WORLD,GuardianOfTime808, XOLEP'sFirstOX, ht4eva,

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next
week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your nec k!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. When in a store, point at the person next to you in line and scream "STOP! THIEF!!

5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6.In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Marijuana.

7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'.

8. When leaving the zoo, run screaming "FREEDOM!! I MADE IT!!"

9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. At a concert, jump on the stage, steal the mic, and scream "I'M A STAR!!" Then start singing 'I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves' Off key.

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

16.Tell a six year old "When I was your age, I was NINE!!"

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner,'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

20 And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .

Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.

If you have ever tripped when there was a "watch your step" sign copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've never even heard of those shows, copy this in to your profile.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile

If you're so obsessed with Artemis Fowl that it's not even FUNNY anymore, copy and past this into your profile.

If you've ever introduced yourself as a character from your favorite book by mistake, copy this into your profile.

If you suspect that you're slightly insane, (and you don't CARE!) copy this into you profile.

If you've done something spontaneous and and REALLY embarrassing in the last five hours, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever spelled your own name wrong, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever chased someone with a pen trying to stab them, copy this into your profile. (You don't want to know.)

If you've ever shouted your favorite Artemis Fowl ship at the top of your lungs in the middle of a really busy place, copy this into your profile. (That was REALLY embarrassing. I did it in assembly, and the whole school was watching!! But still...HTFOREVER!!)

If you get easily obsessed copy this to your profile

If you can't read the word,djytshkyrshfusd, copy this to your profile

If you've ever walked into a wall because you were looking sideways at a friend, copy this into your profile.

If you have more than 100 books in your room, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever laughed for 10 minutes straight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that people who don't like PJO are crazy/stupid/losers, copy this into yor profile.

If you constantly forget what you're saying or are about to say, and i mean CONSTANTLY, copy this into your profile.

If you think that people on commercials talk funny or use phrases no human beings would ever say, copy this into your profile.

If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile. (Screaming does count.)

If you've ever tripped over nothing, copy this into your profile.

If you can raed tihs, cpoy tihs itno yuor polrfie, and sea if ohtres can raed it.

If you DON'T check under the bed for monsters, but you DO check behind the shower curtain for monsters/murderers/Michael Jackson/Opal Koboi, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the news is depressing, copy this into your profile.

If you noticed that in horror movies, it always happens when they're home alone during a thunderstorm at night, copy this into your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If someone actually thinks that you are evil and/or plotting their death, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you have ever laughed at something that you wouldn't normally laugh at because it was really late at night, copy this into your profile

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile. All my friends are insane.

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freaking' Trix, copy this into your profile

If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freaking' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

Don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his moccasins. That way you'll be a mile away from him and you'll have his shoes.

A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.

A friend will bail you outta jail, a best friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying either, "We really screwed up," or "That was fun!"
A friend will walk into your house without ringing the doorbell or knocking, a best friend will walk in and yell,"I'm home!"
A friend will call your parents by their first names, a best friend will call them Mom and Dad.
A friend will tell you that your a great singer even if you're terrible, a best friend will tell you that you suck.
A friend will give you a shoulder to cy on when hebreaks your heart, a best friend will go up to him and say, "It's because you're gay, isnt it?"

If keyboards hate you copy and paste this into your profile! (Especially the FREAKING CAPS LOCK!)

You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, I get a paddle boat and save your stupid ass.

A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work

If you can stay calm when all around you is complete chaos, you probably haven't fully understood the situation.

Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

Two things are infinite; the universe, and human stupidity... not so sure about the universe.

People like you are the reason why we have middle fingers.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not

Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!

What happens if you get scared half to death twice? That's a really good question...i wonder...

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.

Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drinking my water!

Officer, I swear to Drunk I am not God!

My mind works like lightning...one flash and then it's gone.

My heart? Yeah. It's not a playground.

Silence is golden but duck tape is silver

You call me a b? Because a b is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark grows on trees. Trees are a part of nature. Nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful, thanks for noticing.

When life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice, and let life wonder how the heck you did that!

Don’t analyze my beliefs, and I won’t pick out the flaws in yours

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.

I'm not closed-minded; you’re just WRONG!

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that it must be altered every six months- Oscar Wilde

Truth is beautiful without doubt, but then so are lies .

Eagles soar, but weasels never get sucked into jet engines.

The person who can smile when something goes wrong has probably thought of someone to blame it on.

“And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know? I think it helps. I just think just standing there going, "Bang!" That's not going to kill too many people, is it?”

I am not weird, I’m gifted.

Our thoughts and our imaginations are the only real limits to our
possibilities.

How Not To Have To Dry The Dishes.

~Shel Silverstien

If you have to dry the dishes, such an AWFUL BORING chore,

If you have to dry the dishes 'stead of going to the store,

If you have to dry the dishes and you DROP ONE ON THE FLOOR,

Maybe they won't let you dry the dishes anymore!

Fanciest Dive.

~Shel Silverstien.

The fanciest dive that ever was dove

Was done by Melissa of Coconut Grove.

She bounced on the board and flew into the air

With a twist of her head and a twirl of her hair.

She did thirty-four jackknives, and backflipped and spun,

Quadruple gainered, and reached for the sun,

And then somersaulted nine times and a quarter-

And looked down and saw that the pool had no water.

Prayer Of The Selfish Child.

~Shel Silverstein.

Now I lay me down to sleep,

I pray the lord my soul to keep.

And if I die before I wake,

I pray the lord my toys to break,

So none of the other kids can use 'em...

Amen.

The Union For Children's Rights.

~Shel Silverstein

Strike! Strike!

For children's rights

Longer weekends

Shorter school hours

Higher allowances

Less baths and showers

No brussel sprouts

More root beer

And seventeen summer vacations a year!

If you're ready to strike, line up right here!

Batty

~Shel Silverstein

The baby bat

Screamed out in fright,

Turn on the dark,

I'm afraid of the light!

Arrows.

~Shel...well you know the rest.

I shot an arrow toward the sky,

It hit a white cloud floating by.

The cloud fell dying to the shore,

I don't shoot arrows anymore.

Really Dumb Store labels.

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Wow, really, I wouldn’t’ve guessed!!)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (What's the other use?)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Such a surprise.)

On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits".

Here's a joke...

there are 3 men who need to get across a lake...

the 1st one prays to God asking for the strength to get across...

he gets big muscles and swims across...

but almost dies 5 times...

the 2nd 1 prays to God for the strength and the tools he needs to get across...

he gets his big muscles and boat and rows across...

but he almost dies 3 times...

the 3rd 1 prays to God, for the strength, tools, and the brains...

he turns into a woman...

walks 4 yards...

and crosses the bridge

If you think it's stupid that girls are automatically labeled with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are guilty of doing a British, Irish, Australian, Southern accent or Elvis impression, copy this in your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever run into a mirror, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

Weird is under-rated. Copy and paste this in your profile, if you agree and add your name to the list: Celiana, SuperSidney, Wisegirl101, Seweedbrainrocks314, Shorty and KG Inc., BookWormBandGeek, Holly M, xXJayjayXx, ht4eva,

If you are willing to rebel against the flamers and anyone who is bad in the world and harms any animal or plant of any sort (except a few selected) copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: SuperSidney, Wisegirl101, Shorty and KG Inc., BookWormBandGeek, Holly M, xXJayjayXx, ht4eva,

I'm skinny, so I MUST be Anorexic.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.

I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.

I CUT MYSELF, so I MUST be retarded.

I do SELF HARM, so I MUST be suicidal.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.

I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed.

I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I must have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terriost.

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a jerk.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.

I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.(Irish and PROUD!!)

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convienance store.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...

I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.

I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut.

I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.

I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big DICK.

I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life (Well...It's kinda true in my case...x.x)

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.

I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER (Well...I am...:P)

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER AND ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist (Political activist and PROUD! DX)

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.

I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.

I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO (Guilty as charged! ;D)

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.

I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.

I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.

I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian (Well...Once again, guilty as charged...)

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I must be ugly...or crazy.

I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast

I'm BLACK so I must love fried chicken and kool-aid. (I'm a vegetarian!!)

I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.

I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.

I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7.

I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.

I'm MIXED so I must be fucked up.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm in a BAND/Marching Band/Colorguard, so I MUST be a dork.

I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.

I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.

I'm WHITE and have black friends so i MUST think I'm black.

I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.

I love SHOPPING, so i MUST be rich.

I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.

I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.

I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm an OG so I must be mexican.

I'm fat so I MUST have a problem with self control

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve.

I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd. (Heh heh...*Is a nerd.*)

I am BIRACIAL(mixed) so I MUST have smart days AND dumb days (Huh...? o.o)

I love ANIMALS so I MUST become the CRAZY OLD CAT LADY

I'm a GIRL, so I MUST talk only about guys, clothes, and other girls.

I'm an ARTIST/MUSICIAN, so I MUST spend my weekends getting high.

I'm WHITE, so I MUST be racist against black people.

I LIKE TO READ, so I MUST be a dork/nerd/geek.

I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think you're all going to Hell.

I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST be homophobic.

I'm FROM THE SOUTH, so I MUST have a country accent/listen to country music.

I'm FROM THE SOUTH, so I MUST be racist.

I CALL OTHER GIRLS PRETTY, so I MUST be lesbo. (I'm a lesbo who calls girls pretty! XD)

I WEAR PANTS THAT DON'T FALL DOWN, so I MUST be gay.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST hate GLBT, Mexicans, and people who get abortions.

I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST be an illegal immigrant.

I'm HISPANIC/LATINO(A), so I MUST be from Mexico.

I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak (I am weak, but my arm muscles are fairly well developed...:P)

I've decided to REMAIN ABSTINENT, so I MUST be GLBT. (I am BOTH! :D)

I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.

I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I''m NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST work in a casino.

I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big peter.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I have GERMAN HERITAGE, so I MUST be a Nazi

I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude.

I act HAPPY so I MUST have a prefect life and not know real pain.

I DON'T DATE, so I MUST be GLBT. (Hey! Who says that GLBT people don't date?! One of my best friends dates practically every gay guy he meets...It's just a matter of personal preference...)

I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.

I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake

~STOP STEREOTYPES! IF YOU HATE STEREOTYPES AND WANT THEM TO STOP, COPY THIS LIST INTO YOUR PROFILE AND BOLD THE ONES YOU ARE! (I don't know how to bold, so mine have triple eights on both sides of them.)

SOMETHING EVERYONE SHOULD READ (taken from the video of 'This Is The End For You My Friend' by Anti-Flag.)

More than 8.5 million people have cosmetic procedures in the U.S. per year

This is the end... of self mutilation

The average weight of a model is 23 lower than that of an average woman.

This is the end... of insecurity

Approximately one million men and boys suffer from anorexia

This is the end... of self-hatred

Clinical depression affects at least 16 percent of the population at least once in their lives.

This is the end... of hopelessness

As many as 10 million women and girls suffer from an eating disorder

This is the end... of self doubt

80 percent of 4th grade girls have been on a fad diet

This is the end... of marketing disease

Americans spend approximately 12.4 billion on cosmetic procedures per year

This is the end... of insanity

By age 21, the average person will have watched 1,000,000 commercials

This is the end... of exploitation

Billions of dollars are spent to make YOU feel worthless

THIS IS THE END

If you still have to think 'righty tighty, left loosy' when opening, well, anything, copy this into your profile

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile

If you believe PREPS TRAVEL IN PACKS, copy this into your profile.(from Draye who got it from Midnight Pearls aka Mermaid-Halfbreed)

If you belive that the pink bunnies of doom are really out to get you copy and paste this onto your profile

If yoyu are proven to be a "mythical" creature copy and paste this onto your profile(GO VAMPIRES AND DEMONS!)

If you are crazied and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile

if you suffer from blood wrath, copy and paste this onto your profile.

A recent study shows that 92 percent of all teenagers have moved on to rap, put this in your profile if you're one of the 8 percent who stayed with REAL music.

If you threaten inanimate objects, copy and paste this into your profile!

Friends or best friends

FRIENDS:never ask anything to eat or drink

BESTFRIENDS: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food

FREINDS:Call your parents M. Mrs and grandma and grandpa

BESTFRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD GRAMS AND GRANDPA

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail

BESTFRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying DAM we really messed up

FRIENDS: Never seen you cry

BESTFRIENDS: Wont tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when your not down anymore

FRIENDS: helps you up when you fall

BESTFRIENDS: continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"

FRIENDS: gives you their umbrella in the rain

BESTFRIENDS: takes yours and says, "RUN, -BEEP- RUN!"

FRIENDS: wipes your tears when your rejected

BESTFRIENDS: goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?"

FRIENDS: will bail you out of jail

BESTFRIENDS: would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME, LETS DO IT AGAIN!!"

FRIENDS: When you get thrown in jail will come bail you out

BESTFRIENDS: will be in there with you going "Damn, we fucked up."

FRIENDS: Ask you to write down you number

BESTFRIENDS: Has you on speed dial

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later

BESTFRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "my bad .. heres a tissue"

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you

BESTFRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life

FREINDS: Will leave you behind if thats what everyone else is doing

BESTFRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd asses that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door

BESTFRIENDS: Would walk right in and say,"IM HOME"

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell

BESTFRIENDS: Already know not to tell

FRIENDS: Are through high school /college (drinking buddies)

BESTFRIENDS: Are for life

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away when they think you've had enough

BESTFRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say,"Girl drink the rest of that you know we don't waste

FREINDS: Will ignore this

BESTFRIENDS: Will repost this shit

1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public.

2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public.

3.Do not answer fictional characters in public.

4. Do not talk to inanimate objects in public

5. Do not go out in public.

6. Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4.

7.Note expressions.

8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you.

9.Floor is slippery when wet.

10.Lake is slippery when dry.

11.Only talk to strangers you know.

12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all.

13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note.

14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.

15.Kill them for security purposes.

16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings.

17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible.

18.The men in white coats are not your friends.

19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects.

20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.

21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning.

22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.

23.Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age.

24.Always remember, um... um... Damn.

25.Train army of flying monkeys.

26.Goldfish don't like milk.

27.Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.

28.Find out who invented the word "pianist".

29.People are staring at you.

30.So act insane.

31.People are weird, but not as weird as me.

32.Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth.

33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.

34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experience. Do this as much as possible.

35.You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding.

36.Never pet a burning dog.

37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you are wearing a parka.

38.Naked men dig parkas.

39.Beware the naked man who offers you his parka.

40.You know what would look good on you?

41.Immolated cockroaches.

42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.

43.The size of Danny DeVito.

44.Make an amusing facial expression. Like this. O~O

45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.

46.Stalking is fun. Do it more.

47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!"

48.No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world.

49.That way is rum.

50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t.

52.You cannot kill the snow.

53.The snow can kill you.

54.Grass can also kill you.

55.The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms...

56.Catch and castrate leprechaun.

57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say.

58.Staple paper in the middle of the page.

59.In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.

60.You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that.

61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs.

62.Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon.

63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?

64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork.

65.Remember to kill HIM...

66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.

67.Note reactions. Avoid parents.

68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.

69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give you a shot of something nice.

70.Hide the bodies, otherwise people ask embarrassing questions.

71.Eat the evidence.

72.But not if it's broken glass.

73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run.

74.Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids.

75.Disregard last note.

76.Note reactions.

77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year.

78.Stock up on ball point pens.

79.Learn to fly. Tell no one.

80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.

81.Do not stick fingers into blender.

82.Blender... Bad... Ouch.

83.Blood loss is bad.

84.Find way to re-attach fingers.

85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.

86.Answer every question with a question.

87.Ask people what gender they are.

88.Note reactions.

89.Refer to people as "mortal".

90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.

91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.

92.Start by drowning them in fire ants.

93.Find the creators of pop-up messages.

94.Kill them.

95.Brutally.

96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.

97.Dunk head in boiling water.

98.Disregard last note. Was written by Voice #7.

99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling!

100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down...

Lame Jokes

They're undeniably stupid... but they make me laugh anyway.

Batteries are the most melodramatic inanimate object. They don't just run out... THEY DIE!

If it weren't for physics and law enforcement... I'd be unstoppable!

To err is to human... but to utterly foul things up requires a computer.

To be or not to be... that's not really a question.

When life hands you lemons... just add tequila and salt.

I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.

Two guys walk into a bar, the third man ducked.

There were two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other "gee it's hot in here" and the other muffin says "oh my gosh it's a talking muffin!"

DNA: National Dyslexics Association

Knock, Knock. Who's there? You know. You Know Who? That's right... AVADA KEDAVRA!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting--Mooooooo!!

Heaven doesn't want me and Hell's afraid I'll take over. If this is true for you, post this on your profile

If you have ever fallen in love with or had a crush on a fictional character, copy this to your profile (TROUBLE KELP! (But I'll let Holly have him. Arty isn't THAT bad.))

When my psychiatrist went insane, only 3 of my 7 multiple personalties were cured. The rest of us want our money back. If you feel the same. Copy this into your profile.

If someone actually thinks that you are evil and/or plotting their death, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile,

I’m the type of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

Mental anxiety, mental breakdown, menstrual cramps, menopause, did you realize how all our problems begin with MEN!

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects, copy this into your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai, Vert9411, pinkcherryblossom225CherryBlossoms016, SakuraUchiha14,Sakura-Cherry-Blossom-Chan,shuriken-thrower,Cool Anime Girl, DarkangelKyo101, Pinkpigeontowa,Starlight Death, ht4eva,

If you ever walked into the wrong classroom, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile.

30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're one of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile. EcoliandDahChihuahua, Flower of the Desert, Blue Tiger-chan, BleedingSaro, dragongirl92, Shadow Angel 101, o0Dreamer0o, Chocolat-Chan, Pinkpigeontowa, ht4eva,

If you have ever laughed maniacally, choked and/or gagged from lack of oxygen, and then fainted dramatically, copy and paste this onto onto your profile

If you have ever thought that your shadow was going to eat you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tried to stick your head out of the car window and collided with the glass, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been strutting around, acting like you were all that, and tripped ungracefully, copy and paste this into your profile.

I believe in angels, the kind that heaven sends. I'm surrounded by angels but I call them my best friends.

If you've ever fallen asleep in a class, paste this to your profile.

If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile.

I solemnly swear that anyone who flames my stories will get a flame back. FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE! BEAT OUT THE FLAMES! If you agree (or hate flamers), copy this into your profile.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (i find that i am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep had the same tune, and were all composed by Mozart

If you know the clowns are out to get you, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

Stop Flamers Now!

No more shall we tolerate flamers that flame for stupid reasons such as for pairings, who wrote the story, and just because they can!

Copy and paste this into your profile if you want to join the organization called "Stop Flamers Now"

If you ever popped the head of a doll off copy this into your profile!

If you ever had a crush on one of your friends copy this into your profile! (I still do! He's just so NICE!)

If you ever were told to go somewhere and you forgot why and you had to go back to find out copy this into your profile!

If you ever sang the "I know a song that gets on everybodies nerves" song copy this into your profile!

If you think little siblings are annoying, copy this into your profile

If you don't know why people can't get it through their heads that members of the opposite sex can just be friends, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile

If you think president Bush is one of the worst leaders in history, copy this into your file

If you've always wondered where eraser shaving go, go to the dimension of dust and study the book of knowledge

If you want to push a person of a cliff right now but that person happens to not exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

There is head-banging music, and there are head-banging problems. If every time you try to watch a DVD it freezes because jerk scratched it, you want to bang your head on the nearest possible object, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever done something stupid just for the hell of it copy and paste this into your profile

If you love Fanfiction.net, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think it's stupid that girls are associated with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever read started to read a chapter in a fanfiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your pro

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If you have a problem with councilors, copy and paste.

If you hear voices of random book or movie characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. (all the time! XD)

If you love fire, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever been in a grocery store and had a sudden spontaneous urge to grab a pumpkin and start trashing the place with it, copy and paste this into your profile.

I'm a pyromaniac. If you're a pyromaniac, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have died, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: DemonChild of the Dark, ht4eva,

Smiling is good for you. If you frown, copy this into your profile

If you think the cute bunny from next door is evil, kill the foxes of the forest and help the bunny rule the world...

According to the latest figures, 43 percent of all statistics are utterly worthless.

Don't steal. The government hates the competition.

If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.

Tell the truth and run.

Smile! It makes them wonder what you're up to.

Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate.

Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense..

Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.

Generally, generalizations are wrong.

Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make ye mad.

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research.

Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts.

The Truth is out there. So what are you doing here?

If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over.

Whatever you are, be a good one.

You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.

We are the people our parents warned us about.

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.

The difficulty is not so great as to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for.

Belief gets in the way of learning.

If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done?

When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.

Enjoy every minute of life. There's plenty of time to be dead.

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years.

We don't live in the world of reality, we live in the world of how we percieve reality.

If God had intended Man to smoke, he would have set him on fire.

A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.

Have the courage to live. Anyone can die.

Education is important. School, however, is another matter.

When a finger points at the moon, the imbecile looks at the finger.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to change it every 2 months.

Cynics are made, not born.

Maybe this world is another planet's hell.

It is not the number of moments we live that count, but the moments that take our breath away.

On a Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping. (that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos!
..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news fl ash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

On T-Rat (Military food):
Its not for Human Consumption, Animals and Military Use only... (Umnn yeah... isn't military also human)

IF you get called a nickname copy this into your profile and add your name to the list and say your nick name. Stefanlover12 "Robin Hood", ht4eva: "Eva, Ev, Lyna, Lyn, Evi, hyper, mamush (my uncle mike.), Tigger (Like Tigger from Whinnie the Pooh.), Hydro man (self proclaimed), D-rat, Frodo, Eowyn, Holly," etc...alot,

If you like animals give one a home if you can. If you all ready have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this onto your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, loop-de-loop-ride, wfea, PotterPhan21, Tansiana, Tigerlilystar, Update, Gavrochelives

If you believe in fairies copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet WHILE jumping in the air... copy this to your profile.

If you're stalking a fictional character copy this to your profile. (TROUBLE KELP!! Drools on carpet. Mum: "LOOK AT THIS MESS! NOW I'VE GOT TO CLEAN IT UP!" Eva: Go ahead. Mum:" I DON'T THINK SO! YOU ARE IN BIG TROUBLE YOUNG LADY!" Eva: stiffens. "TROUBLE!!" Drools some more. Mum: sighs.)

if you like polkadots copy and paste this on your profile

If you know (a) video game/book/movie character(s) or weapon(s) that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like/love copying and pasting stuff into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile

if you know what the difference between a fruit and vegetable is copy and paste this onto your profile

if you are not completely human copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think that the stupid rabbit on the Trix commercial should just go to the store and buy his own box, copy & paste this to your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

if you believe kids will one day rule the world copy and paste this onto your profile

'They're' is a contraction of 'THEY ARE'. 'Their' means something belongs to a group of two or more people. 'There' is an indication of something that is not in the immediate vicinity. THIS IS NOT THAT DIFFICULT OF A CONCEPT.

Just because you learned a new word, whether it be 'cerulean', 'phenomenal', or 'juxtaposition', doesn't mean you HAVE to include it several times in the opening paragraph.

IF ONE MORE OF YOU WRITES THAT SOMEONE HAS 'CURVES IN ALL THE RIGHT PLACES', I WILL F--ING KILL YOU. If you agree, copy this into your profile.

If you are against racism, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity. (HEY! WHAT ABOUT FAIRIES?!

If you have an annoying younger--or older--sibling, please copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fanfiction.net is way better than Myspace could ever hope to be in eternity, copy and paste and add your name. otherrelmwriter, WWMTgirl, Update,Gavrochelive, ht4eva,

If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile

if you are a vegiterian copy and paste this onto your profile

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingies, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!!

Dear Mr. Adams,
Where do all of your ideas come from? -Nathan
Dear Nothin,
Mr. Adams gets most of his ideas while in the shower. The bathroom door is closed when it happens, so there are two possible sources. Either the ideas are contained in the clean, chlorinated water that comes from the showerhead, or they emanate from the public sewer system and waft up through the drain. Judging from the quality of Mr. Adams' ideas, I think we can rule out the showerhead.
Sincerely, Dogbert

In California they don't throw their garbage away -- they make it into television shows

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering

Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a cute guy for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...

I handed in a last year and the studio didn't change one word. The word they didn't change was on page 87.

I can resist everything except temptation.

Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow; Don't walk behind me, I may not lead; Walk beside me, and just be my friend.

To the world you might be one person…but to one person, you might just be the world!!

In awe I watched the waxing moon ride across the zenith of the heavens like an ambered chariot towards the ebon void of infinite space wherein the tethered belts of Jupiter and Mars hang forever festooned in their orbital majesty. And as I looked at all this I thought...I must put a roof on this lavatory

A guy at work went in for a competition and won a trip to China. He's out there now...trying to win a trip back!

Computers will never take the place of books. You can't stand on a floppy disk to reach a high shelf.

Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.

In California they don't throw their garbage away -- they make it into television shows

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering

Be OPTIMISTIC... all the people you hate are eventually going to die!!

Don't follow in my footsteps... I run into walls!!

By the time you finish reading this you'll realize you just wasted 5 seconds of your life!!

Sometimes I Wonder, "Why is that frisbee getting bigger?" and then it hits me!!

I Have No Idea What's Going On But I'm Excited!!

Nothing is impossible, Except skiing through revolving doors.

Dont upset me. I'm running out of places to put the bodies.

When God made boys, She was only joking.

We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!

Heaven kicked me out. Hell is afraid I'll take over

Great minds roll in the same gutter

With sufficient thrust, pigs fly just fine.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliché, Katie-3llen rideralex, CherubChick92, Glissoning Raven, Aleksandrya Gregonovitch, freakily obsessed Yassen fan, Art is a bang XD, ht4eva,

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you love FANFICTION.NET, add your name and copy and paste this into your profile. Rainstorm007, mysterys, Adderstar, Glissoning Raven, Aleksandrya Gregonovitch, freakily obsessed Yassen fan, Art is a bang XD, ht4eva

Take Time To Read Each Sentence

This is this cat

This is is cat

This is how cat

This is to cat

This is keep cat

This is a cat

This is retard cat

This is busy cat

This is for cat

This is forty cat

This is seconds cat

Now read the THIRD word of every line. X

"Don't give up! It ain't over 'till it's over."
"Better be safe than sorry."
"Don't steal. The government hates the competition."
"Knock yourself out... Or rather, don't."
"I liked you better asleep. My head hurt less."
"Looks like the gang's all here. And guess what? I don't like gangs."
"I am your shield, I am your sword."
"If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing"
"Oh, boo-hoo. Sorry, but my give-a-damn's busted."

REMEMBER WHEN...


getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?

the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?

'm 0 m' was your hero

and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?

when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings

and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?

when - WAR - was a card game

and life was simple and care free?

remember when all you wanted to do

WAS GROW UP?

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Ishbal War by Silvery Mist reviews
They joined the military in hopes of protecting and helping the people of Amestris. They never thought they would end up killing them instead. Royai and other pairings.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 83,554 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 10/22/2014 - Published: 2/25/2009 - Maes H., Riza H., Roy M., Rebecca C.
A House Divided Cannot Stand Right? by Whyntir reviews
Alfred F. Jones is finishing his high school year in England as a foreign exchange student. When a new student arrives to live with them, Alfred finds himself in one of the worst situations his 17-year-old mind can comprehend. Takes place in 1974. APH AU. This version is discontinued for a rewrite in the future
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 17,752 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 8/23/2014 - Published: 9/21/2010 - America, Russia - Complete
Loving It by Whyntir reviews
Alfred Bonnefoy is in love with Ivan Braginsky, a young new teacher from the USSR. Despite how accepting most of the other students are, problems lurk everywhere and all the young American wants is to live happily ever after. As if it would be that easy. Discontinued for future rewrite
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 29,866 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 8/23/2014 - Published: 12/26/2010 - America, Russia - Complete
Right As Rain by more-than-melody reviews
They both prefer their dreams to reality, but she believes that that is not where they belong.. RoyxRiza, Royai
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 22 - Words: 7,566 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 5/21/2014 - Published: 8/24/2009 - Riza H., Roy M.
Welcome To My Life by Pineapplecat reviews
AU. After causing a large amount of property damage, Gilbert Beilschmidt gets sent to a mental hospital, courtesy his brother. Will he find a way to help himself? Or will he be stuck in there forever? Eventual PruCan, rated M for language.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 80,645 - Reviews: 336 - Favs: 304 - Follows: 379 - Updated: 3/7/2013 - Published: 2/3/2011 - Prussia, Canada
Mirror, Mirror by woodbyne reviews
He recognises the face in the mirror in the way that someone recognises a photo of themselves taken in years long since passed. The face was… similar. The structure of it was absolutely identical, but at the same time, it was horribly different. 1p/2p Canadacest. Matthew's not quite sure who's in his bathroom mirror, or why he's so enamoured with the stranger, but it's not him.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,939 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 11/13/2012 - Published: 11/10/2012 - Canada - Complete
Matthew in Rockland by Positively reviews
In whom I sit lonely, in whom I dream angels! From scholar to addict to madman to redemption: Matthew Williams' Twelve-Step Journey into the darker parts of the human soul, and his attempt to find a way back.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 49,561 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 11/2/2012 - Published: 9/2/2011 - Canada, America
The Selfish Sickness by Positively reviews
Philosophy major Matthew Williams is trying to understand the concept of personal identity. Repressed business major Alfred Jones is determined not to think about his own. This is the story of their journey to self-awareness, acceptance, and love. USCAN
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 65,098 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 213 - Follows: 266 - Updated: 9/16/2012 - Published: 4/22/2011 - Canada, America
The Seven Seraphim by luckyrules321 reviews
A boy genius hacked into Foaly's system, and it's up to Artemis to try and stop him from destroying Haven. But things are a bit more complicated than they seem, and maybe Arty's the one in the wrong! A bunch o' pairins that I'm too lazy to write
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 27 - Words: 58,865 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 9/1/2012 - Published: 1/7/2007 - Artemis F.
My Vital Regions by sweetness4theheart reviews
The brain is as much a vital region as the heart; too bad America couldn't deal with the memories. So he forgot, stayed the hero but it couldn't last forever. Regrets are there for a reason and America, it's time to remember yours. AmericaxWorld, AmeriCan, RuPru. InsaneAmerica. GerIta.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 50,681 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 72 - Updated: 8/24/2012 - Published: 5/30/2011 - America, Canada
Clinging by XxFuyukaina-BakaxX reviews
AU Alfred is a normal happy go lucky high school kid whose biggest worry is getting away with not doing his homework. That is until a Russian freak transfers into his class and starts ruining his life. USxRus, PruCan, FrUK Rating changed to M!
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Humor - Chapters: 49 - Words: 230,514 - Reviews: 1491 - Favs: 791 - Follows: 485 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 7/13/2010 - America, Russia - Complete
Mushrooms by woodbyne reviews
Matthew just wanted to relax after school. But someone's been watching him. Someone wants him. Forever. Rated for language, CanUK shipping, dark themes and fairies. Not the Disney kind.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 974 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/3/2012 - Canada, England/Britain - Complete
We're All Screwed by FMB reviews
Alfred stops Matthew from doing something stupid. Matthew pays Alfred back. Now Matthew's life is being screwed over. My friend wanted me to put this in here: ALFRED IS IN MATTHEW MOST OF THIS STORY, however, this isn't AmeCan.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,215 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 6/7/2012 - Published: 3/26/2012 - America, Canada
No One Besides You by Haikoui reviews
Royai, 100theme challenge. Rated T for later chapters. Spoilers for the end of the manga and both animes.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 62 - Words: 36,879 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 4/29/2012 - Published: 11/22/2007 - Riza H., Roy M.
The Eagle and The Tocororo by LxISxAxBABE reviews
The history of Cuba and America from a human standpoint. From the rise to strength to the fall from allies, the turbulence felt by both nations in a union never meant to be. Yaoi in later chapters, minor language. M for a reason.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,429 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/18/2012 - America, Cuba - Complete
Among the Flowers by MusicoftheNight008 reviews
Sometimes even angels need solace, and Matthew found his in a private greenhouse. He would spend much of his time there just losing himself among the flowers...until three demons arrived to shatter his solitude. Non-con. PWP. AmeCan focus.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,383 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 12 - Published: 4/9/2012 - America, Canada - Complete
The Fireman's Arms by woodbyne reviews
AU. Arthur Kirkland is a reluctant rockstar with an exhibitionist stage persona. Alfred Jones is a fan who doesn't realise that he just met his idol. Under unlikely circumstances they become more than friends, but will Arthur's lies destroy it all?
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 17,282 - Reviews: 178 - Favs: 307 - Follows: 122 - Updated: 2/13/2012 - Published: 1/3/2012 - America, England/Britain - Complete
In Sanity by woodbyne reviews
AU, Snapped Canada, One-shot, Character death, Douche-France, self-harm, questionable insanity. "I wonder if I've always been this mad?"
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,477 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 8 - Published: 1/3/2012 - France, Canada - Complete
limit by pixies.rock.hard reviews
After Angeline Fowl found out about her son's undeground adventures, she had dragged her son across continents, until they landed in Italy, which held more surprises than an average mother-son trip can hold. A PRH crossover novel. Aka temporary title. :P
Crossover - Artemis Fowl & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,722 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 12/25/2011 - Published: 11/9/2008
A Day in Our Life by 4cherryblossoms reviews
Ch.43: 'It's the time of year when the world falls in love... and this song of mine, in three-quarter time, wishes you and yours the same thing too." - A collection of one-shots/drabbles on Roy, Riza, and the rest of the gang.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 43 - Words: 58,317 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 12/24/2011 - Published: 8/2/2009 - Riza H., Roy M.
Artemis Fowl and the King of the Trolls by glorwen reviews
Artemis has just lost his third lab assistant due to an untimely visit by Mulch. Now, he has to find a new one. What happens when a Troll King rises and wants her as his bride? Rated T for later... stuff... TroubleXHolly ArtyXOC
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 12,677 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 12/24/2011 - Published: 6/6/2005 - Artemis F.
For What Cost? by SoapyMech reviews
Canada lands on the beaches of Dieppe, and faces the tragic irony of 'Operation Jubilee.' Extreme violence warning.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,415 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/15/2011 - Canada - Complete
Je Suis Qui Je Suis by woodbyne reviews
AU. After being dumped for Alfred's new job Matthew is strung out, addicted and miserable. Broke and in need of a hit he visits his dealer, who gives him a bad batch of heroin and leaves town. He's saved by blue eyes. FrancexCanada, Schutzengel back story
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 11 - Words: 21,132 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 12/5/2011 - Published: 9/14/2011 - Canada, France - Complete
Learning to Love by Hitomi Shirou reviews
When Francis and Arthur become the legal guardians of two troubled and haunted young boys, they might have bitten off more than they can chew. FrUK and FACE family, story is better than summary. UNDER NEW TITLE
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 52 - Words: 85,297 - Reviews: 625 - Favs: 378 - Follows: 394 - Updated: 11/8/2011 - Published: 6/28/2010 - America, Canada
A series of Royai by Silvery Mist reviews
A collection of random Royai stories.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,245 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 8/24/2011 - Published: 10/14/2007 - Roy M., Riza H.
Сдаваться by TheEvilMuffinToaster reviews
AU: They were sub-humans in the great controller's eyes. Being only marionettes in his master plan, they housed broken souls and possessed cracked mentality. They lived for one purpose and one purpose only: To create the perfect human-being. M for shota
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,834 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 7/30/2011 - Published: 5/28/2010 - America, Russia
Disrepair by DLHKM reviews
"Why are you this way, Matthew?" England met his eyes fully, and Matthew felt something painfully familiar stirring inside of him, "What did Alfred do to you at York?" T for implied rape.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,424 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/18/2011 - Canada - Complete
Armide by IlluminatedShadow reviews
Arthur is a lonely novelist. Matthew is the 18 year old next door. What happens next might not be okay. AU, Arthur/Matthew
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,120 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 22 - Published: 7/5/2011 - England/Britain, Canada - Complete
Siberian Divide by die-kokolores reviews
The Summit Meetings as they would have been if America and Russia Alfred/Ivan existed. Story contains some crack, strong presidentxcountry relationships, angst, smut, language, and historical accuracy.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 43,129 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/5/2011 - Published: 6/29/2010 - America, Russia
Labyrinth by Drovenich reviews
After discovering what the world really thinks of him, America makes a desperate wish. That becomes a nightmare. Trapped in a parallel world that hates him, he struggles to maintain his sanity. And the nations who need him are forced to watch him fall.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 30,036 - Reviews: 365 - Favs: 354 - Follows: 392 - Updated: 7/4/2011 - Published: 5/15/2011 - America, Russia
Brotherhood by themagnificent ME reviews
When nations start paying more attention to Canada than America Alfred knows he has to do something, after all he's the hero. eventual RusCan, rape, abuse. collaboration between myself & MissHelga. it's up on DA to.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,120 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 47 - Published: 6/27/2011 - Canada, Russia
in soft voices and sharp eges by foryoualullaby reviews
Following the death of his twin brother Alfred, Matthew Williams is led to a misanthropic psychic named Arthur Kirkland who hates his ability to talk to the dead and hates the living even more.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,270 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 24 - Published: 6/13/2011 - Canada, England/Britain
Exceptionalism by colossally abundant numbers reviews
The aftermath of the financial crisis is not a pretty sight. America doesn't want anyone to come over anymore, and England just wants to know why.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,898 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/10/2011 - America, England/Britain - Complete
Rinse, Lather, Repeat by colossally abundant numbers reviews
Humans are addicted to a game that simulates reality, and because it's a game, they have no problem engaging in irreparable warfare. The nations, unfortunately, bear the brunt of their every attack. France/England, America/China, Ontario/Quebec
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,577 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 5/31/2011 - Published: 5/17/2011 - England/Britain, France
Somniphobia by Positively reviews
Matthew Williams wakes from a three-month-long coma completely physically intact. But he can no longer bring himself to sleep—-either from fear that he will never awaken, or the fear of what will happen when he does.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,109 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 8 - Published: 5/13/2011 - Canada, America - Complete
Psychotic Release Syndrome by TheRockNRollBeauty reviews
"A few golden hairs are scattered over a crinkled pillow. Ivan doesn't think about the sunflower downstairs with its petals missing as if a pair of rough hands tore them away." Insanity, angst, death. RussAme. No happy endings.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 11 - Words: 22,472 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 4/23/2011 - Published: 2/25/2011 - Russia, America - Complete
420 by TheRockNRollBeauty reviews
Canada reintroduces his brother to the wonders of weed. Fluffy, brotherly oneshot written for 420.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,825 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/20/2011 - America, Canada - Complete
The Whole World is Watching by Positively reviews
When Alfred Jones flees to Canada after receiving his draft notice, he meets fellow peace advocate Matthew Williams. But political unrest has a tendency to warp even the best of intentions into something dark and violent. USCAN
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,935 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/16/2011 - America, Canada - Complete
Conquest by M.Avercroft reviews
Spain's outward facade has crumbled while he muses on his past. Upon realizing Canada's similarity to America, he is spurned, angered. He had and lost America. Canada, well, he never even had a chance...or does he? Canada/Spain. Lil on the dark side.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,158 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 10 - Published: 4/14/2011 - Canada, Spain - Complete
True North by burningdarkfire reviews
"With glowing hearts we see thee rise / The True North strong and free!" Canada enters into WWI as England's shadow and comes out as something more. Canada-centric, some Fra/Can and US/UK
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,326 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 3/9/2011 - Canada - Complete
Independence by colossally abundant numbers reviews
Drug dealing was in the family genes and Canada realized he was following nicely in England's footsteps. Canada fuels America's addiction to oil.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,834 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/1/2011 - Canada, America
Russia's Waltz by the lemon thief reviews
Russia was never very good at dancing.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,095 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/8/2011 - Russia, Lithuania - Complete
The Bridge by ellamequiere reviews
Near the end of the Napoleonic Wars, France suffers a major defeat.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,102 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/19/2010 - France, England/Britain - Complete
Paper Wings by Magna Dea reviews
To the LEP emotions are a weakness and expressing them is tantamount to a death-wish. Knowing this, Holly tries to hide her pain and grief by bottling it up inside; Trouble, however, turns out to be more perceptive than she thought... H/T, post-TAC.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,844 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 4 - Published: 11/20/2010 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Center Stage by Reigning Rats reviews
Alfred couldn't be sure when things got so twisted, when the world turned against him and things descended into chaos. Now he can only try to claw his way back up, fighting his own mind. Rated M for being very twisted. RusAme, FACE family, suck summary.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,309 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 10/21/2010 - Published: 10/2/2010 - America, Russia - Complete
Winter as My Season by Nakimochiku reviews
Somewhere between dancing in the rain and a few odd words, Ivan Braginsky figures shy Matthew Williams may be able to handle his form of winter. Russia x Canada, America x Canada, AU
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 8 - Words: 11,214 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 91 - Follows: 94 - Updated: 10/15/2010 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Russia, Canada
Unwritten History by IlluminatedShadow reviews
It's always been complicated between them. Matthew knows this. But sometimes, he wishes it wasn't. Alfred/Matthew. Matthew/Arthur
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,522 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 92 - Updated: 10/12/2010 - Published: 4/9/2010 - England/Britain, Canada
le loup et le lapin by Measured reviews
AU. Former French Revolutionary Francis de Bonnefoy takes exile in London during the reign of terror. He finds himself slowly becoming fascinated by Matthew Williams, a fragile, broken aristocrat with an untold past. France/Canada, past hints of FrUk
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17,552 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/20/2010 - France, Canada - Complete
Drifting Away by LuxaLucifer reviews
Holly is at a funeral, missing two of her closest friends. Spoilers for the Atlantis Complex if you haven't read it. Trouble/Holly, Root/Vinyaya
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 560 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/8/2010 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Pursuit of Happiness by whitetyger123 reviews
After the war, an American soldier comes back with a concentration camp prisoner. But can his devotion bring the troubled man back from the past? RP, written by me and schoolgirl-cheesesculpture. Rated M for language, mature content, and yaoi.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 73,711 - Reviews: 202 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 8/28/2010 - Published: 5/18/2010 - America, Canada - Complete
I Don't Want To Go To Work, Though by DangerousDreams reviews
Mustang doesn't want to go to work. Hawkeye does. Who will win? Sequel to all those other ones. Strongly implied lemon.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 429 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/16/2010 - Riza H., Roy M.
A Ring by DangerousDreams reviews
Bad dreams and early morning sleepiness. Post-manga, sequel to "Stupid" and "Drink". Implied lemon. A heaping bowl of angst with itsy bits of fluff mixed in among it. Yum yum!
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,231 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 8/16/2010 - Riza H., Roy M.
For the Good of the People by LuxaLucifer reviews
Trouble Kelp is losing his faith in the LEP. Will a talk to our favorite Recon officer change his mind?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 298 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 2 - Published: 8/9/2010 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Drink by DangerousDreams reviews
Sequel to "Stupid". Riza CANNOT hold her alcohol. Don't drink, guys. Rated T for drinking, mild swearing, and very mild adult themes.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,856 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Published: 8/5/2010 - Riza H., Roy M.
Stupid by DangerousDreams reviews
Hawkeye's POV for the endish of the manga. I guess.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,649 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 7 - Published: 8/5/2010 - Roy M., Riza H.
Too Much To Ask by more-than-melody reviews
She remembers back to when they were still children and saying 'I love you' was an everyday occurrence because you didn't know the weight your words carried. RoyxRiza
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 475 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 10 - Published: 8/3/2010 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Haunting Echoes by CounterHegemonic reviews
Canada during World War I. Dark. Maniacal Canada and very concerned- and scared- England. One shot but I might make it into a two shot.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 714 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/26/2010 - Canada, England/Britain - Complete
The LEP's Golden Boy by Magna Dea reviews
Despite his reputation as a legend among the officers of the LEP, Trouble Kelp is much more than just a gung-ho Retrieval elf...
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,113 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/19/2010 - Published: 7/8/2010 - Trouble K., Holly S.
True Age by SirenAlpha reviews
Peter Pan has been and always will be a child. Even if he doesn't age time still has its effects.
Peter Pan - Rated: K - English - Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 705 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 11 - Published: 6/22/2010 - Peter Pan - Complete
Something by young dawn reviews
Roy Mustang and Riza Hawkeye have something special, and that is that. ; Happy Royai Day
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,494 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/11/2010 - [Roy M., Riza H.] - Complete
Artemis Fowl: The Haven Trap by Magna Dea reviews
Eight fairies were reported missing in one week; three are now dead on the LEP's doorstep. Holly must connect the gruesome dots and find the killer but her luck goes from bad to worse when she is assigned her mission partners: Chix Verbil and Lili Frond
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 805 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/7/2010 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Forgivemeology by awaylaughing reviews
Canada can do nothing but forgive because Canada was born and raised on the unforgivable. Warnings: child molestation, neglect and melodrama. From the kink meme. Includes France and England, super slight Eng/Can
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,985 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/29/2010 - Canada - Complete
Shards by WeLcOmE2pArAdIsE reviews
How astute they are, that in the middle of the night through crowds and noise, they still know. What lovely antiquity between them that a conversation transpires through silence. :Royai:
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,710 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/10/2010 - Roy M., Riza H. - Complete
If Artemis Was by pixies.rock.hard reviews
If Artemis was Obama's idol, what the hell would happen to the world? What if Artemis decided to design his own clothing line? What would happen if Arty worked at Mcdonald's? Find out in this new random PRH original! R&R
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 7,517 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 5/2/2010 - Published: 3/23/2009 - Artemis F.
Permission to Sympathize, Sir! by 4cherryblossoms reviews
Training is hard, but when you get to share experiences with others, it becomes a bit more worthwhile, right? -- A collection of one-shots on the training experiences of our beloved military men and women in their time as cadets.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 4,797 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/15/2010 - Published: 4/4/2010 - Complete
Outside the World is Weeping by more-than-melody reviews
Outside, the city is weeping, reminding everyone that sky feels sorrow too. The Promised Day is over. Royai, RoyxRiza
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 653 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 6 - Published: 3/18/2010 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Anger and Smoke by Ruingaraf reviews
A series of short Mustang/Hawkeye oneshots, mostly Hawkeye-centric. Mangaverse. 12: "She always thought she'd die protecting him, not being used against him. "
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 3,387 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/16/2010 - Published: 8/4/2008 - Riza H., Roy M.
With Her Vengeance by BlackWidowPretty reviews
There is another path to the flames. A three-shot of rape, rage, and retribution. M! VERY adult themes. Don't like, don't read. Don't waste my, & your, time with flames. Holly/Root. Not really a shipping...
Artemis Fowl - Rated: M - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,189 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 3/11/2010 - Published: 7/26/2009 - Holly S., Julius R.
Or Not To Be by whitetyger123 reviews
Having been forgotten most of his life, Matthew's thoughts are on a spiral downward. AU, rated M for lots of things, including suicidal thoughts and actions, and language.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,691 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 58 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Canada
What You Make of Family by Brizdyn reviews
Roy is called upon to babysit Elicia when Gracia has an emergency. It's not his idea of a perfect weekend but he steps up to care of a little girl who is in need of a father figure and realizes what he's missing in his life. Royai. Chapter 6 up.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,978 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 1/11/2010 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Roy M., Riza H.
Man, What a Way to Find out You're Really Gay by crazyvegimab reviews
The sun was shining, school was out, and they were in the possession of two double scoop ice cream cones. But when Cuba didn't seem cheerful, Canada began to fear the coming of the apocalypse. -Cuba/Canada, High school AU-
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,863 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 1/7/2010 - Published: 8/28/2009 - Canada, Cuba
Sniffles by Thief of Black Winged Hearts reviews
Ed gets Roy sick and they're both stuck in the same house! Riza is called in to look after the two alchemists. What hilarity ensues when Ed tries to get Riza and Roy together in one day? RoyRiza rated T for swearing
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,883 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 142 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 12/31/2009 - Published: 11/11/2009 - Roy M., Riza H. - Complete
Timed Back by rookiewriter09 reviews
Holly Short is on a recon mission when she is accidentally transported over eighty years back in time, and finds herself in a midst of a very familiar plot to flood half of Haven. Making things worse, the LEP believe that she is behind the plot.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,149 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/31/2009 - Published: 12/29/2009 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Voiceless by seroun reviews
Part 2: Perhaps the aftermath was worse, with Roy sighless and Riza... voiceless. -Spoilers for manga chapter 101/102-
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,143 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 12/26/2009 - Published: 10/17/2009 - Roy M., Riza H. - Complete
Never Again by young dawn reviews
Roy Mustang is a dreamer...and dreams never truly die. ; 102 Spoilers
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,189 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/13/2009 - Roy M. - Complete
Adrift by more-than-melody reviews
She watched as the storm raged outside and wondered if somewhere, wherever he was, he was seeing the same thing from his window; the torrential rain, the howling, twisting wind, the angry sky. RoyxRiza, Royai
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,056 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/12/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Search To New Life by singstar microphone reviews
Abby is just an ordinary school girl, with a good life. but when her family are killed in an explosion, her life is destroyed. She becomes rebelious. She then get's sent to Ireland to fix her behaviour. Will Artemis Fowl cure her? or break her further?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 23,013 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 12/10/2009 - Published: 10/4/2008
At Arms Length by more-than-melody reviews
He has seen the glamorous parts of the world; she has seen the wild, untamed parts of it. They are both dreamers, they are both wishers, they are both hopeful that something good can come of this. RoyxRiza, Royai
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 489 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/7/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
All work and no play by hula-crazy reviews
This fic follows on directly after Colfor left it at the end of Holly's initiation. Recommend you read it first if you already haven't. sorry, no Arty in this one!hxt ht hollytrouble
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,489 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 12/4/2009 - Published: 8/16/2007 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Blink by WeLcOmE2pArAdIsE reviews
This is where you want her, want to take her, hold her, keep her, and imagine that she will complete this puzzle; all your edges will be sealed. Inspired by Chapter 101 - Manga Spoilers :Royai:
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,247 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/29/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Remember When It Snowed? by more-than-melody reviews
He is so absorbed that he doesn’t notice the awkward silence between the two officers, doesn’t notice that their responses to his enthusiastic questions are half-hearted at best. Royai, RoyxRiza
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,343 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/28/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Conversations With My 13Year Old Self by Bojangles78 reviews
Explanation's kind of in the title really. Holly Short writes a letter to her past self, featuring Trouble/Holly. Oh, and I don't have a problem with the Vicar of Dibley; it was the first TV show that came to mind :
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 553 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Published: 11/24/2009 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Wearing Thin by more-than-melody reviews
She was sorely tempted to wait for him to exit the room, wait for minutes and hours, until the clock circled back on itself. She would wait all day if it would mean seeing the surprise on his face. RoyxRiza, Royai
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 634 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/16/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Allergies by kathrynblack reviews
When a retired Lieutenant drops dead in his home Holly and Trouble soon find themselves knee deep in a far more complicated investigation than they orrigionaly thought.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery/Crime - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,125 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 11/11/2009 - Published: 11/3/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
A Life for a Life by young dawn reviews
"A life for a life has never been enough." ; a collection of Chapter 100-based drabbles
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 701 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/23/2009 - Roy M., Riza H.
Awakening by Gemini Star01 reviews
During WW2, Nazi doctor Josef Mengele conducted experiments on identical twins. Alfred and Matthew, taken as prisoners of war, were delivered to his program. A rescue is on its way, but it won’t be soon enough to stop the nightmares...
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 19,064 - Reviews: 332 - Favs: 1,176 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 10/4/2009 - Published: 9/24/2009 - America, Canada - Complete
Predictable by Ruingaraf reviews
On the nights that insomnia from Ishbal struck them, he would always produce a battered deck cards of to pass the hours in the darkness. They would play whatever either of them could think of, from rhummy to solitaire. Vaguely postmanga, Mustang/Hawkeye.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 499 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 10 - Published: 9/13/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
How It Ends by more-than-melody reviews
Sometimes the truth hurts. After the Promised Day has passed, they try to pick up the pieces. Royai, RoyxRiza.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,049 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/1/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
I Wrote Harry Potter by Not Bingo reviews
Is the title not enough? ....what would you do if you went back in time?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 43,241 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 9/1/2009 - Published: 1/14/2009
Burning Pile by more-than-melody reviews
Her life was soaked in oil, ready to go up in flames at the tiniest spark. How fitting. Even so, she wouldn’t trade what little she had for the world. Royai, RoyxRiza.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 521 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/30/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Falling A Step Behind by more-than-melody reviews
They spent their whole lives running. He ran away from things, she ran towards them. Royai, RoyxRiza.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 554 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/26/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Ghost of the Future by more-than-melody reviews
“Where’s your father, Riza?” he asked, and her mouth settled into a frown that was too familiar to her face. “You’re here for him,” she said, her voice flat and accusing. RoyxRiza, Royai. Roy returns to the Hawkeye house for the first time in a while.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,060 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/23/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Hiding In the Shadows by more-than-melody reviews
Normal people were afraid of the dark. That was one thing they had in common. Royai, RoyxRiza. Set after she finds out that Selim is a Homunculus.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 950 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/22/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Just Another Manic Monday by thesocialhermit reviews
The terrible week a certain dark-haired colonel has to go through. Will he see the light at the end, achieve what he yearns for? Read and find out.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,259 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/19/2009 - Published: 8/15/2009 - Roy M., Riza H.
Ignis Arcanus by Ruingaraf reviews
Half-remembered phrases in a foreign tongue tumbled from her mouth, aided by a soft melody. All he could do was listen and try to jot it down. "Judicare saeculum per ignem..." A different take on the revelation of the tattoo. Mangaverse.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Mystery/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 785 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Translations Provided By by DangerousDreams reviews
What Roy and Riza SAY, and what they MEAN. Two completely different things. Chapter 2 is the best one.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 770 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/15/2009 - Roy M., Riza H.
The Holly and the Ivy by fairy milly reviews
What if Holly had a sister how would her life be effected by Holly and the LEP. Holly is returning to Haven. This is after The Lost Colony. Its my first fanfic and i hope you like it.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: M - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 8 - Words: 10,621 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 8/12/2009 - Published: 9/2/2008 - Holly S., Trouble K.
In The Shower by OTP and MoonStarDutchess reviews
Riza walks in on her boyfriend Roy as he is does something embarrassing. What is it and how will they react to his actions. Royai
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,364 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/3/2009 - Roy M., Riza H. - Complete
Icarus by The Beetle reviews
Foaly has designed a prototype for a new breed of stealth shuttles, the difference is that this one is designed for space travel. So what will happen on its very first test flight into outer space? This is going to be one wild ride! OLD N' UPDATED
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 26,211 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 8/2/2009 - Published: 8/12/2007 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Crisis by tatterdemalion reviews
Canada had only been privy to betrayal a couple of times in his life. This betrayal seems the worst.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,554 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/2/2009 - Canada, Cuba - Complete
Through the Eyes of Forever by BlackWidowPretty reviews
Souls, lives, and spirits, morphed and destroyed by the flames, and then left to burn with the ashes. Mild language, rating may go up with later chapters. Angst H/T A/H Love Triangle! Yeah, now everybody reads.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,228 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/23/2009 - Published: 6/9/2009 - Holly S.
Annoyance by Ruingaraf reviews
Riza Hawkeye discarded romance novels in favor of mysteries. Why? They were both poorly written and completely inaccurate. Mangaverse, Hawkeyecentric, Mustang/Hawkeye.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,178 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/13/2009 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
To Do And Die by Sakura Tsukikage reviews
The first day of the Battle of the Somme was the bloodiest day in the history of the British Armed Forces. Canada faces the reality of what he's come to do.
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,700 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 105 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/11/2009 - Canada, England/Britain - Complete
A Statue of Us by more-than-melody reviews
They made a statue of us and put it on a mountaintop...Now tourists come and stare at us...Blow bubbles with their gum, take photographs of fun...have fun...The Heroes of the Ishbal Rebellion.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 515 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/6/2009 - Complete
unknown by gavrochelives reviews
Holly, Artemis, and all the other charachtrs are in danger from an unknown source. It involves holly's past and family. H/T please read
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 12 - Words: 7,452 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/3/2009 - Published: 10/14/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S.
The Wilderness formerly Stuck During Christmas by gavrochelives reviews
This was going to be a Christmas story,But it turns out I can't write Christmas stories. So enjoy this random fic about Holly and Trouble, when Opal Koboi sets out to get rid of them.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,686 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 7/3/2009 - Published: 12/15/2008 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Life Drabbles by gavrochelives reviews
Drabbles about random times in the character's lives. Nothing more to really say. Enjoy. Not sure if i'll include ships on not.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 537 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/3/2009 - Published: 3/2/2009
Julius Root by gavrochelives reviews
I noticed they is a lack of fanfics about Root's life, so I decided to write one.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,079 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/3/2009 - Published: 12/27/2008 - Julius R.
Different Point of View by more-than-melody reviews
Riza Hawkeye through the eyes of Jean Havoc, Kain Fuery, Heymans Breda, Vato Falman and Roy Mustang. Slight RoyxRiza. He sees things in her she doesn’t want him to see.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 544 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/29/2009 - Riza H. - Complete
Confession by Silvery Mist reviews
Riza always knew that she was an important part of the Colonel’s life but it wasn’t until after Maes Hughes’s death that she knew just how important she was.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,345 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/17/2009 - Roy M., Riza H. - Complete
Last One Standing by amantebandido reviews
The four most unlikely teens get banded together to play a terrible game that leads them to the darkest places on Earth. Who is forcing them to play, and what do they know about the connection between Artemis and his mysterious new bodyguard?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 31,771 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 5/18/2009 - Published: 2/12/2009
Planets by Bojangles78 reviews
Three years...1095 days, but he knows she will be back, wherever she is.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,614 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 5/16/2009 - Published: 5/15/2009 - Trouble K., Holly S.
SmartSheet Secrets by BlackWidowPretty reviews
H/T romance. I know, I know, a lot of people hate H/T. But even if do, please read this. Don't be so shallow-minded. I changed my friend's mind with this story, and you might just find that you like it. So please read and review.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 16,592 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 5/1/2009 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Letters from Holly by fairy milly reviews
What if every officer had to write a letter to their family and friends incase something should happen to them on a mission. What would Holly Short’s say? set during TLC. chapter 8 is up at last :
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,435 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 4/22/2009 - Published: 9/2/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S.
It's not fair by Roshwen reviews
Removed by the admin, fixed by me. Holly and Trouble are secretly in love. Problem is: Grub loves Holly too, and when he finds out about their romance, he is heartbroken. In a desperate attempt to win Holly's heart, he does something nobody ever expected.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,355 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 4/17/2009 - Published: 8/9/2008 - Grub K., Holly S.
The Ceremony by trubholls25 reviews
Leslie Kelp is returning home for his manhood ceremony, and he has a small problem... Please read, you'll enjoy it! R&R
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,929 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 4/11/2009 - Published: 4/9/2009 - Trouble K. - Complete
Fermata by kikofreako reviews
Vinyaya's life is hectic enough with keeping peace in Haven. But when fate drops an unwanted burden in her lap, Vinyaya must learn where to draw the line between friends, family, and lovers. When to hold on. And when to let go. -between TLC & TTP-
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 8 - Words: 29,377 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 4/10/2009 - Published: 10/4/2008 - Julius R., Minerva P.
Friendly Advice by trubholls25 reviews
Grub has never had much luck with girls, and now he has a huge crush on in his opinion the prettiest girl on the force. When he decides to ask for some friendly advice, what will happen? Just read it! R&R
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,285 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/9/2009 - Grub K., Lili F. - Complete
Artemis Fowl: The Goldlake Society by LeanaLynx reviews
Set before TOD. Holly finds out that there is a secret group of humans who know about fairies. She also temporarily loses her magic, so Trouble has to help her beat up some goblins. Sounds like fun! TxH
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,087 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 3/29/2009 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Why, Why Love by amantebandido reviews
In order to fulfill her grandma's wish of seeing a real faerie, Sam Doroster decided get close to Artemis Fowl by transferring to his school, halfway across the globe. Unfortunately for her, it is an all boys school. Can she hide the fact she is a girl?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 79,606 - Reviews: 245 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 3/27/2009 - Published: 11/24/2008 - Complete
The Root and the Bud by Lli reviews
Delving back into the pre-Artemis days, my attempt at a history for Root and Vinyáya.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,069 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 3/23/2009 - Published: 12/7/2008 - Julius R. - Complete
Cast a Dark Shadow by TechnoRanma reviews
On a cold dark night, Canada meets a strange man… who makes him a promise. Canada and General Winter
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: K - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,178 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 231 - Follows: 19 - Published: 3/17/2009 - Canada, General Winter - Complete
Hunt by Liris reviews
There's a trigger-happy sniper out there, with Artemis in his crosshairs. Holly gets involved, and gets a lot more than she bargained for. Currently H/T. Not connected to any of my other stories, and I own none of the characters. Rated for violence.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 9 - Words: 12,912 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 3/13/2009 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Holly S., Artemis F. - Complete
Life by hehehe.bubbles reviews
This story is about Coral short's death ie. Holly's mother. Based on a teeny bit of The Time Paradox.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 667 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/4/2009 - Holly S. - Complete
Harry Potter and Ghostwhisperer by vampirechickcrazylife reviews
What if Tom Riddle Jnr. Had a half sister?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 287 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/8/2009 - Tom R. Jr., Tom R. Sr.
Different by Opal Roseblossom reviews
We're different than most couples. We aren't openly affectionate, or even civil... ArtemisxMinerva
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 513 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 9 - Published: 1/28/2009 - Artemis F., Minerva P. - Complete
You Are What? by Forgotten Sunrise reviews
Just because you have two genii doesn’t mean that they’ll do smart things. Artemis and Minerva make the biggest mistake of their lives and are forced into a world that they aren’t quite ready for: Parenthood. R&R
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,130 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 1/23/2009 - Published: 10/14/2008
Holly's Dad by major.trouble.kelp reviews
Holly had been having nightmares since the death of Root. Can someone help her? Not to mention there is a new crisis she gets caught up in and a shocking secret is discovered about her past. Between OD and TLC. HT rated T just for safety
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,630 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 1/17/2009 - Published: 1/15/2009 - Holly S., Trouble K.
A Mock Turtle's Story by ixaquasa reviews
Written for the Fangathering Five Times Fanfiction Challenge. The five times Briar Cudgeon didn't get what he wanted.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,637 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/16/2009 - Cudgeon, Julius R. - Complete
Betrayal by XJayjayxShadowfireX reviews
Three-quel to Deceit! Holly goes MIA while she is topside. Who is responsible? Mudman or fairy? Trouble, Artemis, and my OC, Sam are going to find out.Oh, and Fang. We can't forget about Fang!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 16,282 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 1/14/2009 - Published: 12/14/2008 - Trouble K., Artemis F. - Complete
Egyptian Rescue by Liris reviews
Grub is taken hostage, and Holly and Trouble have to rescue him. H/T. Oneshot. It's better than it sounds, I promise! If anyone has a better idea for a title, let me know?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,114 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/14/2009 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Smile: You're on Camera by Lady of Spring Rain reviews
Holly and Trouble are on a faked mission for the sake of video. Things get heated as they start to remeber there past. H/T
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,752 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/8/2009 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
To Whom it May Concern by Opal Roseblossom reviews
Beckett Fowl writes a letter to a University in an attempt to get into a creative writing program. He thinks back to his childhood and what it was like to grow up in a household of geniuses. Or is it genii?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,959 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Complete
Behind These Hazel Eyes by Power of the Pen12 reviews
After a rough breakup with her boyfriend, Holly makes a drastic decision. H/T This is a really early fic of mine. Be gentle. I wrote it when I was like eleven.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 904 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/1/2009 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
How To Save a Life by Power of the Pen12 reviews
Years after their first meeting, Minerva Paradizo lost everything. Desperate, she kidnaps an innocent elf and plans to sell her to regain her fortune. Artemis invites her over to change her cold ways.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,606 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/30/2008 - Artemis F., Minerva P.
Make 'em Pay by kris932 reviews
Bets, swear toads, and Foaly keeping book for the office wagers? Holly Short’s day really couldn’t get worse…and then Trouble comes along. Mix in one gun-ho retrieval Captain and his best female friend swearing revenge on her sexist retrieval squad.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,739 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 12/29/2008 - Published: 12/11/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S.
Comander Love by vampirechickcrazylife reviews
One late night walking home can result in a very wierd morning.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 269 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/27/2008 - Julius R., Trouble K. - Complete
falling by pixies.rock.hard reviews
I entered the manor, and met his gaze. His eyes were uneven, He's hair was black. What am I, a girl from a far away 3rd class country, to him? Then he smiled. A genuine smile. I raised my head, then smiled back. I finally belonged.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 10 - Words: 5,915 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 12/24/2008 - Published: 10/14/2008
Love by Magna Dea reviews
My entry for the Five Times Challenge, the reasons why Foaly tries to keep his thorny personality. Also a tribute to the late Commander Root. Don't worry, there are no ships in here apart from FC - C: Caballine, not Chix
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,156 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Foaly, Julius R. - Complete
Insanity by kathrynblack reviews
In the week since Holly's dissapearence Trouble has been slowly slipping toward insanity. H/T oneshot set while Holly's on Hybras.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 504 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/20/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Redemption by XJayjayxShadowfireX reviews
SEQUEL TO DECEIT Foaly finds the cure to Sam's vampirism on Opal's computer, but it requires reagents that are very hard to get. Sam, Artemis, and Holly go on a journey to find them and cleanse Sam. Artemis/OC. I hope the story is better than the summary.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 15 - Words: 15,936 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 12/11/2008 - Published: 11/24/2008 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
The Invitation by secilmis yazar reviews
Kingsley wants to talk to Tonks... For what?
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,865 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/2/2008 - Published: 11/21/2008 - N. Tonks, Kingsley S. - Complete
Elysium by littlefishh reviews
PostLostColony. Artemis manages to knock up an ambitious supermodel. Holly is dealing with a budding romance of her own, and, in a spectacle of runways and Neutrinos, hearts collide, by choice and chance. Lemon to come. Pairings inside.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 30,316 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 11/29/2008 - Published: 1/6/2008 - Artemis F., Holly S.
The Return to Haven by Captain Evermind reviews
After Holly's return from Hybras, she finds it a little difficult to adjust to having missed three years worth of her life, and to the thought that maybe her friends have moved on without her... Mostly an excuse for H/T goodness.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,017 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 11/25/2008 - Published: 8/2/2008 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Deceit by XJayjayxShadowfireX reviews
Opal Koboi is back with a new plan. Can she take down the Lower Elements with help from her new vampire creations? Trouble/Holly COMPLETE
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 22 - Words: 15,864 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/24/2008 - Published: 11/8/2008 - Artemis F., Opal K. - Complete
Paper flowers and candy clouds of lullaby by Anna Scathach reviews
They tell me I live in an imaginary world of my own. I don't believe them. A Juliet PoV oneshot after the mindwipe.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 784 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/22/2008 - Juliet B. - Complete
Thread For Thread by Epitome of Randomness reviews
Max II is inferior. She's the old version, the one that doesn't matter. Part of the Silence Series.
Maximum Ride - Rated: T - English - Angst/Spiritual - Chapters: 1 - Words: 700 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/22/2008 - Maya A./Max 2, Omega - Complete
through the ages by fairy milly reviews
Holly and Trouble grow up differently but end up at the same place. however what events through there young lives changes there personality and view of life? h/t later in the story
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,491 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/4/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S.
Missing by myrmidryad reviews
Trouble Kelp's death has been faked by Mud Men looking for a fairy to activate the magic of the first human-fairy hybid. Will Trouble ever escape? Will Holly ever see him again? Warning: Angst in the later chapters and heavy abuse. HxT all the way.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 21,848 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 11/2/2008 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S.
So, so, pretty by coolblue110 reviews
A little Juliet/Artemis one shot of when their daughter was born. Has a little Holly in it, too. R&R
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 365 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/25/2008 - Artemis F., Juliet B. - Complete
Lunch by secilmis yazar reviews
Can Holly ever eat in peace today?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 593 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/25/2008 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
An Explanation by Opal Roseblossom reviews
And still she cannot rid him from her mind. His accusations, his words over the years, they are all echoed back at her." A short series of dark vignettes based on the relationship between Opal and her father.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,164 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/6/2008 - Opal K. - Complete
The Life of a Swear Toad: Project Love by pixies.rock.hard reviews
Wart: A simpleton with dreams. Varitek: a genius frog with crazy plans and Viro: A spoiled princess type of girl who lives with Holly. 3 different toads from different sides of the world joins up with the same goal. POV of toads, major A/H.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,763 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 10/1/2008 - Published: 9/23/2008
Mirror, Mirror by Opal Roseblossom reviews
I feel my life rushing past me in a blur of ecstasy and false hope. She drags me behind her, and I do not resist, though I am convinced that it will come to no good.- Opal deals with the one she loves best. Warning: Femslash, selfcest.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 958 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/29/2008 - Opal K. - Complete
Kiss the Rain by Anna Scathach reviews
The female elf Holly Short was tired. And she was sick of the artificial light and the faked "nature" in the Lower Elements. How she missed the air, so fresh. She missed rain, too. Oneshot.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 861 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 9/20/2008 - Holly S. - Complete
Artemis Kissed A Fish by Holly25Trouble reviews
Artemis Kissed A Fish! O.o For my peeps on EC! It's Holly's birthday! This is going to be interesting! Just read it!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 968 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Lost in the Crowd by Opal Roseblossom reviews
Iggy hates crowds. His mind wanders and he remembers the pain that he used to suffer. "I scream. The pain that shoots through my eyes is unbearable. A million tiny knives are driven deep into my brain."
Maximum Ride - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 363 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/14/2008 - Complete
ShellShock by Tris'sLightningQuill reviews
CAUTION! BOOK 4 SPOILERS! When you're on your feet, it's 'Boom, boom, boom, keep punching, stay on your toes' No time to react, no time to absorb the horror going on all around you. It's only afterwards that it really hits you, in the dark, all alone....
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,808 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/24/2008 - Holly S., Julius R.
How INF could have ended by Roshwen reviews
If you've read my other story It's not fair, you already know what this means. If you haven't, go and read it. Instead of a wedding, it ends with a funeral. HT, warning for character death
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 940 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/20/2008 - Trouble K. - Complete
Nothing At All by Epitome of Randomness reviews
Holly muses over the human race, about the things the fairies have lost-and the things that matter most.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Spiritual/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 361 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/21/2008 - Holly S. - Complete
Boarding by Dailenna reviews
As a child, Riza never found herself receiving the sort of attention she wanted. Sorely neglected, she would have done almost anything to please her father. Spoilers for chapter 58 to 60.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,779 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/5/2008 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
Black by Roman-son-of-Truth reviews
Artemis is back in the game of crime, but he's been gone for too long, and new crime lords have taken charge. Artemis is in far too deep now, even his family is being threatened. Black Mail is a dangerous thing mixed with crime. AxM some HxT
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,486 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/6/2008 - Published: 12/3/2007 - Artemis F.
My Random Rant On Mary Sues by Epitome of Randomness reviews
See title. Also contains tips on repairing your Sues so they become OCs, as well as reviewing and a couple of things on genetics. How did that get in there? Read and Review! COMPLETE!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,331 - Reviews: 145 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 1/4/2008 - Published: 12/14/2007 - Complete
A Mistletoe Story by Dailenna reviews
Royai, minor EdWin, DennyMaria, reference to FalmanxScieszka Mistletoe plays a big part in the romantic side of Christmas, but have you ever wondered what it thinks about the whole thing? This is an FMA Christmas through the eyes of a sprig of mistletoe
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,866 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/31/2007 - Published: 12/30/2007 - Riza H., Roy M. - Complete
The Truth About Santa by ArtysSexKitten reviews
Mrs Fowl forces five year old Artemis into having his picture taken with Santa Clause, Artemis is of course repulsed by the idea, he doesn't believe in Santa after all. However, the Mall Santa changes that.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,468 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/20/2007 - Complete
Made for Each Other by major.trouble.kelp reviews
Just a cute little fluff. Excuse the crappy title and summary. No flames, please. Rating just in case. [ChixLilli] Oneshot.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,098 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/8/2007 - Lili F. - Complete
Holly Kelp by tardyarty reviews
In the LEP Holly is not the only female recon fairy anymore, this new girl Laura Coral gets in to the recon and then gets abducted by a demented half species fairy. Will Holly and Trouble find and save Laura? or die trying?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,982 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/4/2007 - Published: 6/18/2007 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Rookie by ItalicsInIndigo reviews
This is Holly's story, back before the existance of the brave officer we all know.This is how one uncertain elf girl becomes a woman, and becomes a legend.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 13,663 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 11/20/2007 - Published: 11/3/2007 - Holly S., Trouble K.
While You Were Gone by Roman-son-of-Truth reviews
Everyone thinks Holly will have a hard time adjusting to her return. Others had a much harder time. They also had to adjust to her dissapearance. I was XrebelxofxthexsacredxheartX but I got a new penname!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,039 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 11/16/2007 - Published: 11/12/2007 - Trouble K., Holly S.
Sitting, wishing, waiting by x.BadWolfRose.x reviews
It's been three years since Holly disappeared, and Trouble Kelp has waited all this time for her to return. Now that she finally has, will things still be the same? Or will new relationships form? a HollyxTrouble fic.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,050 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 8/28/2007 - Published: 8/15/2007 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Injury and Love by paradisegurl101 reviews
Holly's been having a horrible day so Trouble tries to cheer her up. However, everything goes terribly wrong and now someone's after Holly. She needs all the help she can get from her friends to find out what's happening. Post TLC HollyxTrouble
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 21,972 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 8/19/2007 - Published: 4/30/2007 - Complete
A List Of Reasons Why A&H Will Never Get Together by Epitome of Randomness reviews
The title pretty much explains it all. I am so grossed out by AH stories, I mean, come on people! Size does matter, in more than one sense. NOTE: Redundant since the Time Paradox-I've converted to AxH...Shut up! You just...SHUT UP!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 787 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 7/31/2007 - Published: 7/28/2007 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Artemis Fowl: A Darker World by extra short reviews
It has been 10 years since TLC and Holly and Artemis are finding it hard to get used to all the changes.....
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 18 - Words: 6,443 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/19/2007 - Published: 7/3/2007 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Fan Girl Attack on Chateau Paradizo by demented cookies reviews
Read and review to me what you think. Is Minerva a real Mary Sue who deserves to be hated like a wild maniacal animal or is she misunderstood. R&R.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 846 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/18/2007 - Complete
Artemis Behind The Wheel by LadyTyrant reviews
Artemis is not good at driving and Butler, as his teacher, is yelling advice and such at him.Better then summary. Artemis is off character slightly.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 852 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/12/2007 - Artemis F., Butler - Complete
First Week as Captain by Super Reader reviews
It's Holly's first week at the LEP as a captain. She's really happy but has a couple of adventures. From test driving wings, to catching rogue gnomes to going on a date with Trouble Kelp. All in all a very eventful week. Complete.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,155 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 6/19/2007 - Published: 6/14/2007 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Rain by Jarlaxle Baenre reviews
Song fic with A Little Fall of Rain from Les Miserables. It has all culminated in a final battle between the People and the Mudmen, and it has come to this... Character death, HollyTrouble, and AU
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,218 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/1/2007 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Out, Out, Brief Candle! by Jarlaxle Baenre reviews
Trouble mourns Holly's death in a hundred word drabble... Implied character death, obviously, AU, obviously, with a MacBeth theme to it, obviously.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 104 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/23/2007 - Trouble K. - Complete
Artemis Fowl: The Galactic Adventure by Jarlaxle Baenre reviews
Post Opal Deception. Opal Koboi has once again vanished without a trace. It is up to our motley crew of miscreants, LEP officers, and the occasional Mud Boy to save the world once more... HollyTrouble... how can you not? Finally complete!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 24,261 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 1/15/2007 - Published: 5/12/2006 - Holly S., Artemis F. - Complete
Not Good Enough by FrolickingButterfly reviews
Ficlet, Lili Frond centric They'll only love you if you please them...
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 877 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 12/9/2006 - Lili F. - Complete
Seeing Double by Dailenna reviews
[Royai] Roy has inadvertantly unleashed his fanfiction counterpart upon the world.
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: T - English - Parody/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 49,557 - Reviews: 163 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 12/3/2006 - Published: 5/14/2006 - Roy M., Riza H. - Complete
Best Enemies by Update reviews
Two elves at the Academy vying for the best position. How will things transpire?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 729 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/26/2006 - Published: 9/23/2006 - Julius R., Cudgeon
Nothing But Trouble by SetszukiLeroux reviews
Trouble Kelp's name isn't a joke. This is a story centering around fourteen year old Trouble.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,037 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/16/2006 - Trouble K.
Amnesia by crystalocean reviews
During a mission Holly loses her memory, Trouble sets out to fix what he has done. But the only problem is, he doesn't know how to. HT sixth chapter up!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 15,324 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 7/18/2006 - Published: 5/30/2006 - Trouble K., Holly S.
Going Going Gone Soldier by Rainstorm Amaya Arianrhod reviews
Would you have the courage to keep going when those around you lost their lives? WARNING CHARACTER DEATH. RootVinyaya HollyTrouble T for violent themes
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Angst/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 626 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/28/2006 - Trouble K. - Complete
The Old Religion by Kelitzo reviews
Okay, this is a poem about the fairies being kicked off the surface. Its supposed to be a bit sad, I guess. You'll have to read and tell me if it is. Rhyming!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 279 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 6 - Published: 6/18/2006 - Complete
Star Wars fic by hollybridgetpeppermint reviews
Basically, the LEP asked Holly to promote them by making the People's own version of the Star Wars movies. She agrees, and forces Artemis to help. Root makes an appearance, as well as Foaly, Lili Frond, those infallible brothers, Trouble and Grub Kelp, an
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,653 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/17/2006
When black meets Acorn by polka-dotted-pengiuns reviews
Artemis is having a normal day until some strange things start happening. Could it have something to do with the recent Alien sightings? Pg just to be safe. Artemis FowlMen in Black crossover.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 12,672 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/16/2006 - Published: 2/4/2006 - Artemis F. - Complete
Thrice Denied by Jarlaxle Baenre reviews
One shot. Lily and James' final moments in their duel against the Dark Lord come alive...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,825 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 14 - Published: 2/5/2006 - Lily Evans P., James P. - Complete
Why? by Boussole reviews
“Feminist tomboys are supposed to hate makeup, the colour pink, and all those other girly things.” Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 537 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/4/2006 - Holly S. - Complete
Adrianna by waffles to you reviews
The last thing she ever wanted was for her daughter to be in danger, now seemingly inevitable, she has to protect her, come hell or high water. Even if protecting her is the last thing she will ever do…
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,095 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/21/2006 - Published: 11/26/2005
The Holly Wreath by Nyghtvision reviews
Nyghtvision respectfully Presents, for your Holiday Amusement, Part the First of a Holiday Story, chronicling, among Other Things, tales of a certain Holly Short and her father.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,004 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/25/2005 - Holly S.
When you say nothing at all by waffles to you reviews
A cute little songfic, for all you HollyTrouble fans like me! xxx
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 508 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/18/2005 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Old Friends and Enemies by Trouble Kelp reviews
Holly is being stalked, but not by someone she thought would want to stalk her. Then she risks her life to save an old friend who she thought was dead. What will happen when some of her old enemies regroup?
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 17,457 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 10/26/2005 - Published: 9/9/2005 - Holly S., Trouble K.
One Shot by Captain Arianna Trouble reviews
Oneshot about one shot. Story of emotions that has OD spoilers.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 521 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/28/2005 - Holly S. - Complete
Trouble at the LEP Academy by Trouble Kelp reviews
Trouble Kelp and Holly Short have been paired together at the LEP academy. They must overcome a series of obstacles to pass the year. A secret Holly's mother took to the grave is revealed and Holly meets her twin sister, a fashion designer.[Holly Trouble]
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 28,867 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 9/27/2005 - Published: 3/17/2005 - Trouble K., Holly S.
Holly Short: The Suburbs of Haven by Trouble Kelp reviews
Holly goes to work, for just another day, which turns out to be qutie eventful when her home gets shot up while she is at work. That leads to a trip to the shopping mall. A totally random oneshot. [HollyTrouble]COMPLETE
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,960 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/13/2005 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Artemis Fowl: The Encrypted Trouble by Captain Arianna Trouble reviews
Artemis is back and is changing left and right, for the better sadly. He works with Holly and Mulch's P.I. and is getting in over his head when danger comes to a friend...Last Chapter Up
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 30,943 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/21/2005 - Published: 6/7/2005 - Opal K., Artemis F. - Complete
The Innocent Picture by Fudge 1 reviews
Holly Short has enough to worry about, what with work, Internal Affairs, and a second Koboi attack on Haven. A little sister just complicates things further...
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 27,390 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 7/19/2005 - Published: 5/5/2005 - Complete
Call Me Holly by mentalsunflower reviews
Read the Artemis Fowl Files before viewing! If you wish. ;) Trouble Kelp notices Holly Short her first week on the job, and wills himself to ask the unexpected...(ONE-SHOT FOR NOW...)
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,703 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/3/2005 - Complete
Accidental Love by JaxTer reviews
This is my fist Fic. yet so PLZ read and review. Are Trouble and Holly dating? Why are they always so happy around each other? And WHY is Root so happy? So many questions so little space to write. Trouble and Holly are just friends right, until fate comes
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,305 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/29/2004 - Published: 12/8/2004
The Storys Of Holly and Trouble by Night Of The Land reviews
The "Stories of Holly and Trouble" is about them as teenagers an before they work at the LEP. My first fic read to find out more.... Currently on hold Indefinitely. Sorry guyss.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 731 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 9/14/2004 - Published: 9/12/2004
Love on the Force by Laitoste Morna reviews
Trouble has trouble asking Holly Short out on a date. Will Foaly be able to help him or will everything go trerribly wrong. Read to Find out.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,775 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 8/17/2004 - Published: 8/5/2004
Definitely Worth the Trouble by D'Arvit Tyranny reviews
... to read this fic. Find out what happens when Trouble Kelp asks Holly out for lunch. If he'll EVER get through to asking her in the first place, that is. Expect ample cheese, corn, and torture.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,736 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/18/2004
Death by Blue Yeti reviews
COMPLETE. Three deaths. How these deaths shape the world and the fairies who survive them. Details Holly's first few days at the LEP. First story in the Triangle Arc. PreAF Hollycentric, with a side order of Trouble and Grubby revelations.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,016 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 13 - Updated: 10/19/2003 - Published: 8/9/2003 - Holly S., Trouble K. - Complete
Solace In The Dark by Kitty Rainbow reviews
The Kelp family are unique, and widely respected. But not everything has been rosy for them... and when times are hard, they stick together.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 884 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/3/2003 - Trouble K., Grub K. - Complete
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Holly reviews
Just a poem from a semi-romantic perspective. You can see it from Trouble Kelp's point of view if you like but not Artemis's perspective! DX . Really, though, it's from my point of view...*Blush.*
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 376 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 7/31/2010 - Holly S.
Dreamer reviews
Another poem...Again, for Roy, although some of it could also apply to Riza. : Please read and review!
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 189 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/27/2009 - Roy M., Riza H.
Don't Stand Up reviews
My first Fullmetal Alchemist fanfic. Chapter 102 spoilers. A poem for Roy. "Don't stand up; you'll just fall down again."
Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: K - English - Tragedy/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 158 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 12/16/2009 - Roy M.
Betrayal reviews
Artemis must betray the fairy people to save his parents. An interspecies war breaks out. Can humans and fairies work out their differences, or will understanding come too late to save the world? H/T Post TTP. Rated T for future violence. Minor romance.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 5,713 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 8/3/2009 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Colours reviews
Really stupid. I just see everything as a colour, and I figured I'd write something about it. The colours of each characters personality.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 5 - Words: 909 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 12/26/2008 - Published: 11/14/2008
We all must die reviews
This is just another one of my poems. I wrote it with Holly in mind, but it can relate to anyone. It's about death. Duh . Reviews appriciated. Eva
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 207 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/26/2008 - Complete
Valentines day reviews
A humor based story involving Valentines day! H/T. Rated T just in case. Chapter 5 is up! Please review! Enjoy!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,451 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 10/2/2008 - Published: 9/15/2008 - Holly S., Trouble K.
Trouble's Pov reviews
Just a little songfic. One shot. It's about Troubles feelings after Holly disappears to Hybras. It IS a romance! I'm a devoted H/T shipper. For details, see my pen name! Plz review!
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 608 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Published: 9/14/2008 - Trouble K., Holly S. - Complete
Tattered, broken heart reviews
It's just a poem about how Holly feels after Roots death. It is NOT a romance! I DON'T like Holly/Julius pairings! No offense to people who like that ship! This is my first fanfic! Please don't kill me! Constructive criticism appreciated! Plz review! Ev
Artemis Fowl - Rated: K - English - Tragedy/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 227 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/13/2008 - Holly S., Julius R. - Complete
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