BritishBitches
hide bio
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 08-30-08, id: 1681170, Profile Updated: 07-23-11
Author has written 7 stories for Twilight.

Hey, Em and Lu here - collectively known as British Bitches.

Right now, we're nearly finished with In A Month: Sweep Any Girl Off Her Feet. which is an AH high school story, and based around a bet. We wont say anymore, you have to go read it! As well as this, we're well on our way with Peace Within Chaos, our angst-ridden celebrity group therapy story. We've also just published a new historical fic called The Storm, which is the whole cowboy/Indian deal!

Other than our full-length work, we have a selection of one shots to choose from, so get going!

The link to out LJ account (If it works...) -

The link to the Spanish version of I Like Your Nose, as translated by the awesome AnniePattz376 - http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2222046/

Don't hesitate to PM or email or whatever if you have any questions...

Thanks for the support, and all our amazing reviews!


TEMPORARY BETA WANTED:

For the next month or so, Em's AFK on vacation without internet access, and I don't feel greatly confident in posting content that she hasn't checked over. Because of this, I'd greatly appreciate a temporary beta who can help me out for the next few weeks. I'm not overly picky on where you're from, but it would be a lot easier if my beta was from the UK, because of time zones and all. Obviously though, American or anything else would be fine. I do also like MSN Messenger contact (because it's instant!) but emailing is fine. The only thing I really do ask of a beta is that I can get a relatively fast turn out of the chapter, because I'm nothing if not impatient ;) Feel free to PM me, or email! Thanks very much in advance, Lu ~


Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Hit By Destiny by ocdmess reviews
Bella wants to die, and almost gets her wish fulfilled when she gets hit by a shiny Volvo. She is left with serious injuries, and the only thing keeping her from dying is the person who hit her. All Human, Rated M for language, dark themes & violence.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 59 - Words: 463,685 - Reviews: 20334 - Favs: 12,537 - Follows: 7,112 - Updated: 11/29/2012 - Published: 10/24/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Learning Curve by Amethyst Jackson reviews
AU and AH. Short chapters with daily updates. When Bella's boyfriend brings up the issue of her virginity with his ex, she decides to take charge of her own fate. Now complete with occasional snippets to come.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 138 - Words: 83,353 - Reviews: 13843 - Favs: 3,525 - Follows: 2,971 - Updated: 5/14/2012 - Published: 10/31/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Six Weeks by syrrah reviews
I wonder how a story with no summary would go. Is anyone game to read it? Let's see...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 22 - Words: 69,359 - Reviews: 895 - Favs: 656 - Follows: 889 - Updated: 4/22/2012 - Published: 6/12/2011
Dear Mr Masen by jendonna reviews
"Error 434: Reprimanding an executive." Life changing or just stupid? Dear Mr. Masen: A story of unauthorized Internet usage, culinary delights and the goings-on at Cullen, Inc. AH, ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 127,500 - Reviews: 12941 - Favs: 8,267 - Follows: 6,292 - Updated: 2/14/2012 - Published: 11/17/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Good, The Beard and The Stubborn by rinabina reviews
A mini-take for Foul Territory. Edward comes home from a road trip with a new "development." Bella reacts, lines are drawn, sides taken and the bet is on. Who will break first? Will be complete by the end of the week. E/B AH AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 11,988 - Reviews: 318 - Favs: 406 - Follows: 195 - Updated: 10/2/2011 - Published: 9/25/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Baby You Can Drive My Car by syrrah reviews
Music fans think rock diva Bella Swan is brilliant, talented and a gift to humankind. People who actually know her think she's a menace to society, and a pain in the backside. Then Edward Cullen comes on board as tour manager, and who knows what he thinks?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 90,015 - Reviews: 501 - Favs: 320 - Follows: 392 - Updated: 9/22/2011 - Published: 1/16/2011 - Bella, Edward
A Matter of Life and Death by WhatsMyNomDePlume reviews
Forget being scared to death, Bella Swan isn't even scared of death, something that both greatly annoys and-even if he won't admit it-entices Edward Cullen. If only she weren't trying to destroy him. Collab w/ Derdriu oFaolain for FGB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 27,390 - Reviews: 1262 - Favs: 1,142 - Follows: 594 - Updated: 7/22/2011 - Published: 6/15/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
How My Life was Ruined in 14 Days by moon.witche reviews
Bella has a plan. It's a detailed plan for her whole life. But in her quest for perfection, she has skipped certain high school experiences. With graduation fast approaching, Bella concocts a new plan – a plan to lose her virginity. BxE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 62,366 - Reviews: 3802 - Favs: 3,901 - Follows: 3,270 - Updated: 2/3/2011 - Published: 9/15/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Port Angeles Players by WriteOnTime reviews
New in the town of Forks and eager to please her boss at the university, Bella auditions for a local production of Shakespeare's "Much Ado About Nothing". Her co-star is a handsome but confusing local doctor. Curtains-up on love. AH canon pairings.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 170,459 - Reviews: 4581 - Favs: 4,014 - Follows: 1,611 - Updated: 8/29/2010 - Published: 3/11/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Storm reviews
Abandoned as a baby, a fair skinned girl is found by the chief of a Native American tribe and taken in as one of his family, but when she meets a copper haired cowboy, everything she knows is thrown into disarray. ExB AH, set in 1800's, M in the future.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,342 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 7/23/2011 - Published: 7/21/2011 - Bella, Edward
In A Month: Sweep Any Girl Off Her Feet reviews
Trying to catch her attention? Want to make a good impression on that special lady? Or just want to improve your social skills when dealing with the opposite sex? Well, you've found the right book! We're here to help! AH ExB RxEm AxJ
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 35 - Words: 82,774 - Reviews: 1449 - Favs: 696 - Follows: 858 - Updated: 6/18/2011 - Published: 9/3/2008 - Edward, Bella
Peace Within Chaos reviews
Emmett, Edward, Bella, Rose and Alice are all sent to therapy bootcamp, run by Jasper Whitlock, a newly qualified therapist. They have two things in common; they all have their own issues and none of them want to be there.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 27 - Words: 38,624 - Reviews: 806 - Favs: 257 - Follows: 342 - Updated: 5/16/2011 - Published: 10/9/2008
The Pink Envelope reviews
Bella & Edward have been friends since their childhood, but they can't seem to take their relationship further; every February 14th, Bella's heart is broken with disappointment. Another year, another pink envelope, but just how many more can Bella take?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 17,035 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 36 - Published: 2/13/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Official Twilight Summer SmutDown 2009 reviews
14 days of summer-themed-smut! Same as the SmutVent calendar, each chapter will be a one shot written by a different guest author in a countdown to 21st June - the first official day of summer. Enjoy!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 83,390 - Reviews: 346 - Favs: 337 - Follows: 342 - Updated: 8/7/2009 - Published: 6/7/2009 - Complete
The Official Twilight SmutVent Calendar 2008 reviews
25 days of smut! The best smut authors on FanFic have come together to create the ultimate advent calendar! Each day leading up to Christmas we will be posting a new chapter, each written by a guest author! Lot's of lemons! Enjoy! x Outtakes now posted!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 137,830 - Reviews: 1123 - Favs: 1,000 - Follows: 685 - Updated: 6/7/2009 - Published: 12/1/2008 - Complete
I Like Your Nose reviews
Edward meets a gorgeous brunette in a subway station, and can't get her out of his head. If he didn't believe in love at first sight before, he certainly does now. He doesn't even know her name, but if it's meant to be he'll find her. BxE One-Shot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,696 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 39 - Published: 3/15/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Manager of:
Community: The Official Twilight Smut Calendars (Christmas 2008/Summer 2009)
Focus: Books Twilight