Hugger-Of-Trees
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Joined 09-12-08, id: 1691209, Profile Updated: 04-24-10
Author has written 27 stories for Discworld, Murder in Suburbia, Doctor Who, Being Human, Firefly, and Torchwood.

To sum up: Brit, who thinks she has a way with words, attempts humour but occasionally gets sidetracked into fluff.

Author writes mostly for Monstrous Regiment as feels that most other interesting discworld characters are still under the direction of the man himself (long may this continue). Would write Dr Who/Firefly, but suffers from lack of cannon knowledge with the former and inability to write the dialogue in the latter.

You will find Femslash here, if that bugs you feel free to move along. However, author suffers from terminal blushing if attempts to write actual smut so the strongest you'll see is restricted to fluff only. Everything will be labelled as such so feel free to browse away at the more soldiery tales instead.

The Tonker/Lofty stuff can be a mite dark, so be warned.

Reviewing is always nice. Not that I check my stats daily. Oh no. That would be a tad obsessive.

Must just add: these stories were written over 2 years (i.e. I'm slow). Make that 3 years now (I'm very slow). If you're waiting for any WIP, be aware that new chapters will not arrive at any great pace. In my defence the chapters you get do tend to be complete in their own right, cliffhangers are not my bag baby.


There is a vague Polly/Mal arc amongst the collection, though this does not mean they should be read in order:

What Polly Did Next - how a reunion of acquaintances came about

A Spot Of Light Relief (with associated The Amazing Maladicious) - not brilliantly written I'll confess, but does explain why they're wearing Green instead of Red.

The First Snowfall - fluffy snippet from the winter following "Light Relief"

Gifts - Written for Hogswatch 2009, the second part explains some of the mystery surrounding the lighter.

-Then a number of years running about all over the country. Includes:

A Quiet Night In

On Her Majesty's Postal Service

Falling into a later time period:

Dulce Et Decorum Est

Clarification Of Regulations

The drabbles in The Army Field Guide To... fit in here and there, but are not tied into the main arc.

The Tonker/Lofty series:

The Past Is Foreign Country

Another Beginning

Bookends

After The Curtain Fell

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Miss Susan's Hogswatch by Runt Thunderbelch reviews
While the rest of us slumber, safe in our Hogswatch beds, Miss Susan has been working.
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 990 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Published: 1/3/2012 - Susan Sto Helit
Having a Ball by Strange Brew reviews
Pure fluff-and-nonsense. Polly and Mal contrive to go to a party in the Abominable City; there are red dresses and blue meringues; a few friends from the Watch make cameo appearances. Polly/Mal. Rated M to be safe, though it's probably more of a T...
Discworld - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,926 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Published: 4/3/2011 - Polly P. - Complete
A Busy Schedule by Marcus Rowland reviews
There are all sorts of loose ends in the aftermath of the Dalek invasion... 100-word Doctor Who / Discworld crossover, major spoilers for the end of the last series of Doctor Who.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 153 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 15 - Published: 4/29/2009 - Harriet J. - Complete
The Brave and the Bold and the Slightly Illegal by Gogol reviews
Being the swashbuckling story of the JUSTICE LEAGUE OF ANKH-MORPORK, an insidious band of vigilantes whose evil might be thwarted only through the efforts of mild-mannered journalist SAM VIMES JR., his father's ghost, & eighteen dead, goldfishy sidekicks!
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 14 - Words: 41,954 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 4/7/2009 - Published: 12/12/2008
100 Things Crowley Would Do Before the World Ended by shewhoguards reviews
Other people plan 100 things to do before they die. Crowley planned 100 things before EVERYBODY died.
Good Omens - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 27,286 - Reviews: 134 - Favs: 589 - Follows: 47 - Published: 1/7/2009 - Complete
End Of the Line by shewhoguards reviews
Hell was, Snape decided, a crowded railway platform.Post Deathly Hallows. Contains spoilers.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Discworld - Rated: T - English - Angst/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 30,933 - Reviews: 732 - Favs: 1,821 - Follows: 479 - Updated: 10/31/2008 - Published: 7/22/2007 - Severus S. - Complete
The Tenth Doctor Owner's Guide by SnowFox3 reviews
Just as it says. Never have another problem with your Tenth Doctor again with this handy guide!
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,964 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 169 - Follows: 11 - Published: 7/20/2008 - 10th Doctor - Complete
In Denial We Trust by Laryna6 reviews
Coppers would be far too suspicious of anyone calling themselves a god of policing to actually believe in them. However, official denials are also something coppers won't believe. If only Vimes wasn't too much the ultimate policeman to claim godhood...
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,806 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 27 - Published: 6/27/2008 - Sam Vimes, Vetinari - Complete
Naked Cometh AnkhMorpork Nights by Twist reviews
Gay Voldemort.
Crossover - Discworld & House, M.D. - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,357 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 5/22/2008 - Published: 4/22/2008 - G. House - Complete
This Is How The Universe Ends by shewhoguards reviews
EXCUSE ME, he said, not impolitely. BUT YOU ARE HOLDING UP THE END OF THE UNIVERSE.
Crossover - Discworld & Torchwood - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,993 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 308 - Follows: 24 - Published: 4/20/2008 - Complete
The Original Naked Quidditch Match by Evilgoddss reviews
When a Magical game of Truth & Dare goes wrong, the Gryffindor Quidditch team must 'bare' up and face the consequences. And as the news spreads like wildfire in mmail things get quite out of control.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 22,510 - Reviews: 832 - Favs: 3,631 - Follows: 668 - Published: 7/29/2007 - Harry P. - Complete
Feegles on a Firefly by SpaceAnJL reviews
Because this is how my mind works. Sorry about that.
Crossover - Discworld & Firefly - Rated: K - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,637 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 61 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/21/2007 - Complete
Indiscreet by EdorasLass reviews
Zoe catches Wash playing with his dinosaurs. Sexual references.
Firefly - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 149 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/10/2006 - Wash, Zoe W. - Complete
Two Gorram Days by Dyce reviews
PostObjects in Space, preSerenity. Jayne is left all alone with a bad leg and a crazy girl for two days. It doesn't go as badly as it could. First in the Horseshoe Nail series.
Firefly - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,353 - Reviews: 209 - Favs: 1,040 - Follows: 83 - Published: 12/4/2006 - Jayne, River - Complete
Plogviehze, Baby by The Divine Comedian reviews
Monstrous Regiment. Mal manages to do the one thing that would normally make Polly get out the stake and hammer. Shame she's stuck with the vampire on what would be a road movie, if it was a movie, and if there was an actual road.
Discworld - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Suspense - Chapters: 15 - Words: 85,864 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/12/2006 - Published: 8/19/2006 - Polly P. - Complete
Found in Translation by Sequitur reviews
In which Tony gets hit on the head and starts speaking in tongues. Metaphorically, of course.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,505 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 475 - Follows: 49 - Published: 10/14/2005 - Tony D. - Complete
A Mary Sue Alphabet by Irony-chan reviews
A's for Amanda Our hero's twin sister Got lost as a baby and Gosh, how he missed her...
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,497 - Reviews: 2718 - Favs: 6,648 - Follows: 472 - Published: 1/12/2005 - Complete
Odd One Out by intrasonic reviews
A story of someone's quest to NOT find herself. Sometimes, it's harder than it sounds. [On Hold]
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 62,095 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 2/1/2003 - Published: 5/8/2002
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Sleigh Bells Ring, Are You Listening? reviews
One midwinter night, Tilda gets an unexpected visitor. Or: "You don't have to believe in the Hogfather for him to pay you a visit. He's that good."
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,730 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/2/2012 - Complete
It's The Thought That Counts reviews
Apologies for the late arrival of this year's Hogswatch Fluff. Polly/Mal. Summary: Presents can be nice. Occasionally they can also be a little inappropriate. Sometimes, if you're lucky, they can be both inappropriate and nice at the same time.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,232 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/1/2011 - Polly P. - Complete
What Polly Did Next reviews
If Monstrous Regiment could be filed under “What Polly Did” this would fall under the remit of “What Polly Did Next” telling as it does the joys, trials and tribulations of our eponymous heroine, picking up in the year following the final paragraph of MR.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 50,000 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/5/2010 - Published: 8/1/2009 - Polly P.
The Army Field Guide To reviews
A collection of drabbles related to the lighter and more fumble-y side of army life. Femslash warning: Polly/Mal containing an explosion of humorous innuendo with associated non-explicit adult themes .
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 6,022 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/3/2010 - Published: 9/8/2009 - Polly P. - Complete
Crack Fic: InterUniverse Travel Incorporated IIIb reviews
Continuation of Crack!Fic: Inter-Universe Travel Incorporated III Torchwood , entered as "New Story" to access the Doctor Who Crossover strand. Inter-dimensional? Of course The TARDIS got involved. The fetching back of Maladict from Cardiff...
Crossover - Doctor Who & Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 15,581 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 7/25/2010 - Donna N., Polly P. - Complete
After The Curtain Fell reviews
Long years after the events of Monstrous Regiment two bit-part characters bump into each other again. Everyone drifts to Ankh-Morpork in the end. There are obstacles of a difficult past to navigate, not to mention the blasted Undertaking Tonker/Lofty
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 23,427 - Reviews: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/21/2010 - Complete
Gifts reviews
It is well known that soldiers don't wear rings. They do, however, often have a keepsake of some sort or other hidden safely in their belongings. This is the story of two such items. Polly/Mal Femslash . Happy Hogswatch, here's your fluff!
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,645 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/19/2009 - Polly P. - Complete
When You Don't Think reviews
The Doctor has to face up to the consequences of an action he took in Journey's End.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,794 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/2/2009 - Donna N., 10th Doctor - Complete
The Past Is A Foreign Country reviews
Stories from the Grey House, a pre MR look at the lives of Tonker and Lofty. It will not be pretty, but it might, just might, be beautiful. WIP
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 21,932 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 10/15/2009 - Published: 9/30/2008
Bookends reviews
Being a duo of narratives looking at the events in the day before and the weeks after the account laid out in Monstrous Regiment. Tonker/Lofty assumed but not expanded upon in both, Polly/Mal implied in the second
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,306 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 10/13/2009 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Complete
Business As Usual reviews
An AU-Fic of Ash/Scribbs Murder in Suburbia placing them in London during WW2 and the Blitz. Written for Ralst’s International Day Of Femslash Day 2009 challenge. Will contain romantic relationship between women - eventually
Murder in Suburbia - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,433 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 8/2/2009
Crack Fic: InterUniverse Travel Incorporated II reviews
Maladict gets plonked onto Serenity this time. It's just a jump to the left. A little step to the right. With your hands on your hips, and your characters in a dimension jump fic. Let's do the Time Warp again!
Crossover - Discworld & Firefly - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,012 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 8/1/2009 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Polly P. - Complete
Crack Fic: InterUniverse Travel Incorporated III reviews
Inter-dimensional? Of course Torchwood got involved. Maladict takes a trip to Cardiff. Sing it if you know the words: It's just a jump to the left. A little step to the right. With your hands on your hips, and your knees in tight...
Crossover - Discworld & Torchwood - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,145 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Polly P. - Complete
Crack Fic: InterUniverse Travel Incorporated reviews
Mal Monstrous Regiment is transplanted unwillingly into the Being Human Universe. It's just a jump to the left. A little step to the right. With your hands on your hips, and your characters in a dimension jump fic. Let's do the Time Warp again!
Crossover - Discworld & Being Human - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 17,537 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Polly P. - Complete
We'll Meet Again reviews
A glimpse into the future of Alice, long after the events of the fort recorded in the book known as Monstrous Regiment. An old friend stirs up old memories and new feelings.
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 473 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 5/24/2009 - Complete
The Life We Live reviews
A collection of drabbles dipping in and out of a life well lived. Polly/Mal, rated T for minor adult themes and character death.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 822 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/8/2009 - Polly P.
First Snowfall reviews
Polly/Mal It snows. Mal cares not. Polly instigates a snowball fight. Together they fight crime! No, not really . Snow-jinks occur. Rating: Light Romance - nothing more
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,232 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Published: 3/19/2009 - Polly P. - Complete
A Quiet Night In reviews
A slightly tipsy Lieutenant Perks returns to find her vampire relaxing by the kitchen hearth of the Duchess and attempts to distract her from her book. Mal/Polly. Femslash. A wee bit o' fluff for Hogswatch nothing explicit
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,243 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Polly P. - Complete
Ruffled Bedsheets reviews
Mal's attempts at poetry Polly/Mal Lovely fluff no flesh - well, a shoulder is referenced
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 372 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 11/22/2008 - Complete
On Her Majesties Postal Service reviews
When the Diplomatic Corp borrow Lieutenant Perks to assist in their peace talks in Ankh Morpork our intrepid duo are separated. Will letters be enough?
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,806 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Published: 11/16/2008 - Polly P. - Complete
The Amazing Maladicious & His Vanishing Slave Girl reviews
A boring posting. A quiet day’s activity cruelly interrupted. Watch in awe as our heroines escape with their dignity intact! Polly/Mal, Femslash warning, but nothing explicit - Uptight Brit remember? R&R is always nice.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,223 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/2/2008 - Polly P. - Complete
She Holds My Hand reviews
Midway through MR the recruits stop for saloop. Polly notices the entwined hands of Tonker and Lofty. The response to her glance is not what she was expecting. This is one of the posibilities why that may be so. A snapshot of wounded minds.
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 563 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 10/1/2008 - Complete
Dreams of Crackling Flame reviews
Lofty dreams. But the sleeper has no control over the subconcious and nightmares can creep in. Warning for angst.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 359 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 9/30/2008 - Complete
Clarification of Regulations reviews
A lazy summer afternoon with a bored vampire leads to a new insight into Military protocols. Polly/Mal, Femslash warning. Relax I don't write flesh - I'm much too British. Anyone want to R&R? Anyone?
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 617 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/17/2008 - Polly P. - Complete
Another Beginning reviews
How Tonker and Lofty got out. I always wondered why they'd be in the cellar in the first place. The Grey House was such a huge place, it had lots of cellars. With lots of different purposes.
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 865 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Published: 9/17/2008 - Complete
A Spot of Light Relief reviews
Polly & Mal are seconded to another regiment for a highly secret job. If they only follow the plan, everything should be easy. However, which plan should they be following? Established Polly/Mal, affection only, nothing explicit. Pre Dulce et Decorum est.
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,552 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 9/16/2008 - Polly P. - Complete
Dulce et Decorum Est reviews
Years after the events of MR, Polly has led her "lads" into a testing situation and is faced with a difficult decision. Polly/Mal implied.
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,417 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/16/2008 - Polly P. - Complete