Poll: WHat esper should Naruto learn from next? Vote Now!
Author has written 2 stories for Final Fantasy I-VI, Fallout, and Naruto.
LINKIN PARK RULZ!!
My email, for anyone interested, is email@example.com
If you need to get in contact with me, PM me, or find me at one of these forums:
I Naruto fanfics are overpopulated by yaoi, primarily NaruSasu. If you believe me put this on your profile.By Order of ChaosLink, Dark_Magician_41,DarkSamuraiX1999, and SuperSaiyanShinobi
If you believe that Naruto and Hinata are meant to be together and think that it will happen, copy and paste in your profile. NARUHINA FTW!! DarkSamuraiX1999
A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.
As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.
The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won't repost it?
Repost this if you truly believe in God.
PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what,
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny Me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murderer chanted, "Toma Sota Balcu,"as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceilling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.
Fourty-Six laws of Anime:
Originally compiled and edited by Darrin Bright and Ryan Shellito
1. Law of Metaphysical Irregularity The normal laws of physics do not apply.
2. Law of Differentiated Gravitation Whenever someone or something jumps, is thrown, or otherwise is rendered airborn, gravity is reduced by a factor of 4.
3. Law of Sonic Amplification, First Law of Anime Acoustics In space, loud sounds, like explosions, are even louder because there is no air to get in the way.
4. Law of Constant Thrust, First Law of Anime Motion In space, constant thrust equals constant velocity.
5. Law of Mechanical Mobility, Second Law of Anime Motion The larger a mechanical device is, the faster it moves. Armored Mecha are the fastest objects known to human science.
6. Law of Temporal Variability Time is not a constant. Time stops for the hero whenever he does something 'cool' or 'impressive'. Time slows down when friends and lovers are being killed and speeds up whenever there is a fight.
7. First Law of Temporal Mortality 'Good Guys' and 'Bad Guys' both die in one of two ways. Either so quick they don't even see it coming, OR it's a long drawn out affair where the character gains much insight to the workings of society, human existence or why the toast always lands butter side down.
8. Second Law of Temporal Mortality It takes some time for bad guys to die... regardless of physical damage. Even when the 'Bad Guys' are killed so quickly they didn't even see it coming, it takes them a while to realize they are dead. This is attributed to the belief that being evil damages the Reality Lobe of the brain.
9. Law of Dramatic Emphasis Scenes involving extreme amounts of action are depicted with either still-frames or black screens with a slash of bright color (usually red or white).
10, Law of Dramatic Multiplicity Scenes that only happen once, for instance, a 'Good Guy' kicks the 'Bad Guy' in the face, are seen at least 3 times from 3 different angles.
11. Law of Inherent Combustability Everything explodes. Everything. First Corollary - Anything that explodes bulges first. Second Corollary - Large cities are the most explosive substances known to human science. Tokyo in particular seems to be the most unstable of these cities, sometimes referred to as "The Matchstick City".
12. Law of Phlogistatic Emission Nearly all things emit light from fatal wounds.
13. Law of Energetic Emission There is alway an energy build up (commonly referred to as an energy 'bulge') before Mecha or space craft weapons fire. Because of the explosive qualities of weapons, it is believed that this is related to the Law of Inherent Combustability.
14. Law of Inverse Lethal Magnitude The destructive potential of a weapon is inversly proportional to its size. First Corollary - Small and cute will always overcome big and ugly. Also know as the A-Ko phenomenon.
15. Law of Inexhaustability No one EVER runs out of ammunition. That is of course unless they are cornered, out-numbered, out-classed, and unconscious.
16. Law of Inverse Accuracy The accuracy of a 'Good Guy' when operating any form of fire-arm increases as the difficulty of the shot increases. The accuracy of the 'Bad Guys' when operating fire-arms decreases when the difficulty of the shot decreases. (Also known as the Stormtrooper Effect) Example: A 'Good Guy' in a drunken stupor being held upside down from a moving vehicle will always hit, and several battalions of 'Bad Guys' firing on a 'Good Guy' standing alone in the middle of an open field will always miss. First Corollary - The more 'Bad Guys' there are, the less likely they will hit anyone or do any real damage. Second Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is faced with insurmountable odds, the 'Bad Guys' line up in neat rows, allowing the hero to take them all out with a single burst of automatic fire and then escape. Third Corollary - Whenever a 'Good Guy' is actually hit by enemy fire, it is in a designated 'Good Guy Area', usually a flesh wound in the shoulder or arm, which restricts the 'Good Guy' from doing anything more strenuous than driving, firing weaponry, using melee weapons, operating heavy machinery, or doing complex martial arts maneuvres.
17. Law of Transient Romantic Unreliability Minmei is a bimbo.
18. Law of Hemoglobin Capacity The human body contains over 12 gallons of blood, sometimes more, under high pressure.
19. Law of Demonic Consistency Demons and other supernatural creatures have at least three eyes, loads of fangs, tend to be yellow-green or brown (but black is not unknown), and can only be hurt by bladed weapons.
20. Law of Militaristic Unreliability Huge galaxy-wide armadas, entire armies, and large war-machines full of cruel, heartless, bloodthirsty warriors can be stopped and defeated with a single insignificant example of a caring/loving emotion or a song.
21. Law of Tactical Unreliability Tactical geniuses aren't...
22. Law of Inconsequential Undetectability People never notice the little things... Like missing body parts, or wounds the size of Seattle.
23. Law of Juvenile Intellectuality Children are smarter than adults. And almost always twice as annoying.
24. Law of Americanthropomorphism Americans in Anime appear in one of two roles, either as a really nasty skinny 'Bad Guy' or a big stupid 'Good Guy'. First Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the big dumb Americans are the American translators. (Sometimes referred to as the Green Line Effect.) Second Corollary - The only people who are more stupid than the American translators are the American editors and censors.
25. Law of Mandibular Proportionality The size of a person's mouth is directly proportional to the volume at which they are speaking or eating.
26. Law of Feline Mutation Any half-cat/half-human mutation will invariably: a) be female b) will possess ears and sometimes a tail as a genetic mutation c)and wear as little clothing as possible, if any.
27. Law of Conservation of Firepower Any powerful weapon capable of destroying/defeating an opponent in a single shot will invariably be reserved and used only as a last resort.
28. Law of Technological User-Benevolence The formal training required to operate a spaceship or mecha is inversely proportional to its complexity.
29. Law of Melee Luminescence Any being displaying extremely high levels of martial arts prowess and/or violent emotions emits light in the form of a glowing aura. This aura is usually blue for 'good guys' and red for 'bad guys'. This is attributed to Good being higher in the electromagnetic spectrum than Evil.
30. Law of Non-anthropomorphic Antagonism All ugly, non-humanoid alien races are hostile, and usually hell-bent on destroying humanity for some obscure reason.
31. Law of Follicular Chroma Variability Any color in the visible spectrum is considered a natural hair color. This color can change without warning or explanation.
32. Law of Follicular Permanence Hair in anime is pretty much indestructable, and can resist any amount of meteorological conditions, energy emissions, physical abuse, or explosive effects and still look perfect. The only way to hurt someone's hair is the same way you deal with demons... with bladed weapons!
33. Law of Topological Aerodynamics, First Law of Anime Aero-Dynamics ANY shape, no matter how convoluted or odd-looking, is automatically aerodynamic.
34. Law of Probable Attire Clothing in anime follows certain predictable guidelines. --Female characters wear as little clothing as possible, regardless of whether it is socially or meteorologically appropriate. Any female with an excessive amount of clothing will invariably have her clothes ripped to shreds or torn off somehow. If there is no opportunity to tear off the afore-mentioned female's clothes, then she will inexplicably take a shower for no apparent reason (also known as the Gratuitous Shower Scene). --Whenever there is a headwind, a Male characters will invariably wear a long cloak which doesn't hamper movement and billows out dramatically behind him. First Corollary (Cryo-Adaptability) - All anime characters are resistant to extremely cold temperatures, and do not need to wear heavy or warm clothing in snow. Second Corollary (Indecent Invulnerability) - Bikinis render the wearer invulnerable to any form of damage.
35. Law of Musical Omnipotence Any character capable of musical talent (singing, playing an instrument, etc.) is automatically capable of doing much more "simple" things like piloting mecha, fighting crime, stopping an intergalactic war, and so on... especially if they have never attempted these things before.
36. Law of Quitupular Aggultination Also called "The Five-man Rule," when "Good Guys" group together, it tends to be in groups of five. There are five basic positions, which are: a) The Hero/Leader b) His girlfriend c) His Best Friend/Rival d) A Hulking Brute e) A Dwarf/Kid Between these basic positions are distributed several attributes, which include: --Extreme Coolness --Amazing intelligence --Incredible Irritation
37. Law of Extradimensional Capacitance All anime females have an extradimensional storage space of variable volume somewhere on their person from which they can instantly retrieve any object at a moment's notice. First Corollary (The Hammer Rule) - The most common item stored is a heavy mallet, which can be used with unerring accuracy on any male who deserves it. Other common items include costumes/uniforms, power suits/armor, and large bazookas.
38. Law of Hydrostatic Emission Eyes tend to be rather large in Anime. This is because they contain several gallons of water, which may be instantaneously released at high pressure through large tear ducts. The actual volume of water contained in the eyes is unknown, as there is no evidence to suggest that these reservoirs are actually capable of running out. The reason water tends to collect in the eyes is because Anime characters only have one large sweat gland, which is located at the back of the head. When extremely stressed, embarrassed, or worried, this sweat gland exudes a single but very large drop of sebaceous fluid.
39. Law of Inverse Attraction Success at finding suitable mates is inversely proportionate to how desperately you want to be successful. The more you want, the less you get. First Corollary Unfortunately, this law seems to apply to Otaku in the real world...
40. Law of Nasal Sanguination When sexually aroused, males in Anime don't get erections, they get nosebleeds. No one's sure why this is, though... the current theory suggests that larger eyes means smaller sinuses and thinner sinus tissue (see Law #38 above). Females don't get nosebleeds, but invariably get one heck of a blush along the cheeks and across the nose, suggesting a lot of bloodflow to that region.
41. Law of Xylolaceration Wooden or bamboo swords are just as sharp as metal swords, if not sharper.
42. Law of Juvenile Omnipotence Always send a boy to do a man's job. He'll get it done in half the time and twice the angst.
43. Law of Quadrotriscadecophobia There is no Law #43.
44. Law of Nominative Clamovocation The likelihood of success and damage done by a martial arts attack is directly proportional to the volume at which the full name of the attack is announced.
45. Law of Uninteruptable Metamorphosis Regardless of how long or involved the transformation sequence or how many times they've seen it before, any 'Bad Guys' witnessing a mecha/hero/heroine transforming are too stunned to do anything to interrupt it.
46. Law of Flimsy Incognition Simply changing into a costume or wearing a teensy mask can make you utterly unrecognizable to even your closest friends and relatives.
To the administration of Fanfiction.net,
I am one of many members of Fanfiction.net that is deeply concerned with your current actions on this site. The deletion of countless stories and numerous accounts has already called in massive protest, both in the form of authors publishing letters of worry and in two petitions against this sweep, one of which at the present moment has over 11,500 signatures, found on change(dot)org. However we feel that a more direct approach may also be needed to make our voices heard.
Many of us feel confused about this sudden sweep, as up to the present that you have, as we believed out of respect for the artistic freedom of us authors and the understanding that in our current society both violence and sex have become, largely due to the easy access of visual and acoustical material through the world wide web, such mundane parts of life that an average sixteen-year-old or older is well aware of them, and as such suited to read a story containing them, considering that many teenagers around the age of sixteen often already have direct and personal experience with sex, and indirect experience with violence through television, cinema and/or computer games, kept a tolerant stance regarding such content in our stories. We labored under the assumption that you were aware of the mixed ages of your members, and as such accepted that a thirty-year-old man may be neither willing nor able to write like a fourteen year old boy. We were also certain that you were well aware that certain genres such as romance, tragedy, horror, drama, angst, crime, and hurt/comfort need violence and/or sexual content on the higher levels of literature, as without it such genres quickly become stale and boring. Your sudden, unannounced and absolute purge of countless stories, without giving the authors a chance to edit their work, as such feels to many of us as nothing more than the callous and malicious stomping on months, if not years of hard work.
We were all assuming that you were aware of the spread ages of your users, how else would we explain the existence of the K and K-Plus Ratings, yet with your current actions many wonder why you have two whole ratings of stories for a group of users who are according to your own Terms of Service not supposed to be on this site, as your ToS clearly state Fanfiction.net is intended for users aged thirteen or older, yet none for the adults that make up a large percentage of the members on this site.
Your current purge of stories, while perhaps not illegal, although morally questionable as you are in some cases destroying stories for which your ToS clearly grants us ownership, has also concerned us authors for a different reason. Your current policy of removing stories and banning authors without warning and, as those who have received a notice of this, both intended and 'accidental' messages, know, without explanation as to what is wrong with the story, where in the story that part is, and what we should keep in mind for future stories we might write, is unnerving, as it leaves no option for debate or improvement. We authors are also not given a chance to edit and correct our work to save it from deletion. While this was not your intent, your actions worry us authors because they clearly show us that on Fanfiction.net we have no right to object an unjust treatment, nor do we have any kind of protection against the arbitrariness of the administration. We are not accusing you of maliciously deleting our stories without cause, we are merely noting the fact that the administration too is human, and as such not infallible to error.
Many of us fear that with this purge you are opening a rift between the administration of Fanfiction.net, and its users, which is something we hope to avoid. You may have intended this sweep to be a simple matter, however for many authors it is the end of an era, an era of artistic freedom on this site. We are all members of Fanfiction.net, and many of us were very proud of this fact and the site itself, striving to stay true to its motto: 'Unleash your imagination'. With the current policy of deletion, many of us fear that we will soon be faced with the choice of either leaving this site we all took pride in and derived joy from for years, or find ourselves in a shadow of the site we knew and loved, where censorship demands that we no longer unleash our imagination, but instead are forced to bind, gag and cage it. Neither option is something we truly want.
We of course understand that children should be protected, although current society makes this pretty much an exercise in futility, however simply deleting everything is no solution. There are alternatives, from having Adult-stories only visible to actual members to a simple 'are you above 18?'-button, all far less drastic options.
The simple fact is that we authors see Fanfiction.net as something unique, and we are of the opinion that simply going to another site is not a viable option. The closest match allowing the MA-Rating, Adultfanfiction.net, has multiple issues, including the fact that there is apparently no supervision and essentially no organization, stories belonging into the yaoi-folder clogging folders like 'general', where our stories would likely land. Adultfanfiction is also almost entirely composed of pure smut, and many authors who worked hard for their stories would not want to see the fruit of their labor stuffed between two porn-flics just because there is a single lemon-scene of perhaps 3.000 words in a 200.000 word story that's there because it fits or furthers the plot, or even a story that has no sex and was flagged for violence, where the author will feel even stronger that his work does not fit into the general style of the site.
We of course realize that the administration cannot work miracles, and that some things take time, however there are things we can ask for. First is the immediate stop of the deletion of stories and accounts, and, as far as possible, their restoration, at least for a time-period in which negations can be held. We are aware that you will not immediately jump up to completely change the rating-system, however we have listed a number of, as we feel, reasonable demands that you should take into consideration before continuing this purge of stories: 1. Many authors and readers were not yet members during 2002, and have trouble seeing where exactly the problem is. We ask that the administration give us the reason the MA-Rating was banned in 2002, and if you insist on your current stance, give us a detailed explanation as to WHY the rating cannot be reintroduced to this site.
2. Authors put a lot of work into their stories, work that the administration takes advantage of by allowing advertisements, including noise-producing advertisements that pose annoyances for readers, to be placed on our profiles and stories, which doubtlessly is a way to finance this site. As such, seeing that it is the work of the authors that keep this site alive, every author who works on his stories and in that manner supports this site has the right that, if his or her stories are deleted from the site, he is given a concrete explanation why, to prove that the story, or as it was referred to in the Terms of Service, the User Submission, for which the site reassured him he retained the ownership-rights in its ToS, was removed, and in the cases where no copy exists destroyed, for a valid reason and not solely on the whim of an administrator. Another reasonable request would be that the author in question be given a period of at least 24 hours before termination so that he may edit his Submission to meet the guidelines, or save it to be reposted on a different site so that his work will not be lost.
3. If the Administration can afford the resources for actions such as the current purge of stories or the Image Manager, an addition of debatable usefulness seeing that many, if not most, authors will lack either the motivation or the artistic talent to create individual covers for their stories, then the community may request additions that are actually helpful to a majority. Here two suggestions.
3.1 We request that, if the Administration insists on keeping its current policy on the Ratings, they do a review of them and clearer define what conditions must be met for a Submission to be given a specific rating, seeing as the current explanation of the ratings is extremely imprecise and leaves a great deal to individual interpretation. The perhaps most important statement 'Detailed descriptions of physical interaction of sexual or violent nature is considered Fiction MA' (Source: Fictionratings) could hardly be more vague, seeing that every individual has a different concept of what precisely counts as 'detailed'. An explanation as to why the rating for adults, who make up a large percentage, if not the majority, of the users of http://www.Fanfiction.net is banned, yet the ratings K for children five years and older, and K-Plus for children nine years or older is valid despite the fact that the Terms of Service clearly state that http://www.Fanfiction.net is 'not intended for children under 13' (Source: http://www.fanfiction.net/tos/), would also be appreciated.
3.2 In the recent years the genre known under terms such as 'Slash/FemSlash', 'Yaoi/Yuri' or 'Boys Love/Girls Love' on this site has grown steadily, and while in the name of tolerance it is only correct, and even admirable, that these stories remain on this site like any other, there are a number of readers that, while not against homosexuality in any shape or form, are simply not interested in reading such stories. However, there are Categories in which the ratio between Slash-stories and non-Slash-stories has reached a point where a reader looking for a non-slash story has to browse to up to six pages of summaries just to find a single one. This has doubtlessly led to the point where some readers have given up searching in that category, which means that authors writing non-slash stories in that category have lessened chances of getting the views, and reviews, that many hope for in order to improve their works. As such, we request that the site allow authors to tag their stories as slash, as most already do in their summaries, and enable users not interested in such stories to filter them out so that they may easier find stories they are interested in in all categories, and so that users who are interested may also find such stories easier.
We members of Fanfiction.net have stood silently for years and watched how this site changed. In recent years some of the changes have concerned us, as they seemed unnecessary and, and here I apologize for the bluntness, as useful as foot-fungus. We see no point in having 5cm of white space to both sides of our forum or on our profiles, and especially not in our stories where we appreciate every millimeter of space filled with plot. We see no point in ordering stories by popularity instead of alphabetical, as we can read the numbers of stories in a category, and we can find a category by alphabet, but may not know how popular a story is, meaning that we now have to manually check every single category to see if it is the one we want. We see no point in having the 'advanced'-button when we press search, as it is obvious we want the advanced options when we clicked on search instead of typing our search word into the bar that appears when you let your mouse wander over the word 'Search' in the gray bar at the top of the page.
We took all these things, and we would have taken the other changes, however this purge of stories is a step far too drastic. When we joined Fanfiction.net, Section 11 of the Terms of Service clearly stated that we have a duty to protect and defend this site. In accordance to this duty we break our long silence now, to protect Fanfiction.net from itself.
We implore the administration of Fanfiction.net to rethink their radical stance, to protect the sanctity of the authors and their works, and to help us that Fanfiction.net will still stand tall as a bastion of creative writing in the future, that it will still be the wonderful ground on which people of all genders, ages, religions, and colors may freely Unleash their Imagination.
Penname: Thanathos, a once proud, now deeply concerned member of Fanfiction.net. One voice amongst many.
For those that may agree with this, please feel free to sign on and send this to the support server, maybe we can get some movement on this.
EDIT: Just made a forum on this to, should be on the profile, not sure if that will help.
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