Eurral Eseret
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Joined 10-08-08, id: 1711251, Profile Updated: 08-10-10
Author has written 4 stories for Twilight, and Criminal Minds.

Why Hello There...

Writing is like an addiction of mine. It's something that I turn to whenever I'm in a strong state of emotion, whether it be happiness or anger. I write a lot, so most of my stories don't get posted. I have a very specific style of writing, and I hardly ever experiment with it. I feel very weird talking like this by the way... I'm usually not this stiff... Anyways, here are a few things about me:

Basic Information

Name:Call me Eseret.

Gender: Female

Live In: Chicago

Age: Let's just say that I'm in high school.

Height: 5'7"

Hair Color: Dark Brown.

Skin Color: Tan.

Eye Color: Brown.

Political: Democrat.

Religion: I'm a confirmed Catholic...However, I don't exactly believe in God... (Go figure that one out.)

Sexuality: Bi-Sexual. Got a problem with it? Take it somewhere else.

Hobbies: Basketball, Chilling With Peeps, Writing, Crew.

Authors I Often Collaborate With

You may find be working on projects with authors such as caseytabwizz and Psychic-Porsche-3. They are fantastic people and great writers and I really enjoy writing stories with them.

Another Author on here I simply can't live without is passion assassin. She proof-reads all my stories and makes them sound amazing. Go check her stories out!

My 'Twilight' Obsession

Favortie Book In The Series: Eclipse

Favorite Character(s): Jasper Whitlock Hale & Rosalie Lillian Hale.

Least Favorite Character(s):Jacob Black & Bella Swan. Yes, I know it's weird to hate two out of the three main characters, but they piss me off. I absolutly hate Bella's whiny ass, and Jacob's thick skull.

What Team Am I On?: Team Edward.

Other Characters I Like: Carlisle, Alice, Emmett, Demitri, Renesmee, Seth, Leah, Angela, Jessica, Peter.

Other Characters I Dislike: Sam, Jared, Mike Newton, Marcus. (Everyone else I'm indifferent about.)

Favorite Canon Pairing(s): Jasper/Alice.

Favorite Non-Canon Pairing(s):Jasper/Peter, Jasper/Rosalie, Rosalie/Carlisle.

My 'Criminal Minds' Obsession

Favorite Episode(s): L.D.S.K., Charm and Harm, Secrets and Lies, The Fisher King part 1 & 2, "Profiler, Profiled", The Big Game & Revelations, Elephant's Memory, Lo Fi & Mayhem, 52 pickup, Omnivore, To Hell and Back, "Nameless, Faceless", and 100...Oh, and Confliction, because Jackson Rathbone is in it. And he wears a dress. Is it me, or does that man look good in practically anything?

Favorite Scene(s): When Morgan acuses Prentiss of having a boyfriend. When Rossi leaves Reid alone in a ditch. When the team is going through the metal detector, and the security sees that Hotch is carrying two guns. When Hotch is tutoring Reid on how to use a gun. When Hotch and Reid hugged :)

Favorite Quote(s):"I knew you'd understand." -- Dr. Spencer Reid. "Remind me to have her drug tested..." -- Aaron Hotchner. "What did you join a boy-band?" -- Aaron Hotchner. "It's like trying to forge for dinner with a pair of number two pencils!" -- Dr. Spencer Reid. "Don't make me slap you in front of all these people." -- Derek Morgan.

Favorite Character(s): SSA Aaron Hotchner.

Least Favorite Character(s): Strauss -- I. WANT. HER. TO. DIE.

Team Members I Like (In Greatest To Least): Garcia, Reid, Morgan, Prentiss, Rossi, JJ. (I love them all, I just favor some more than others.)

Other Characters I Like: William LaMontagne Jr., Diana Reid, Agent Anderson, and Jack Hotchner.

Other Characters I Dislike:Jordan Todd, Kevin Lynch, and Haley Mother-Fucking Hotchner. Now that the cheating whore is dead I hope she burns in hell with George Foyet himself.

Favorite Canon Pairing(s):Will/JJ -- I love his accent :)

Favorite Non-Canon Pairing(s): Hotch/Reid (Oh just admit it, they are adorable together.), Morgan/Prentiss. Sorry people, but I only like Morgan and Garcia as friends. However, if the show actually makes them a canon pairing I won't complain.

My Opinion On Elle And Gideon: So a lot of people were very depressed when Elle and Gideon were replaced with Prentiss and Rossi. I guess it was rather sad, but really didn't bother me that much. Well it did a little when Gideon left because of how much Reid was attached to him, but him leaving also was kind of the start to Hotch/Reid. Seriously people, didn't anyone else notice how Reid began to latch onto Hotch after Gideon left? Huh? Well I did. And then there is Elle...I mean really, what else can I say? The chick went loco and quit in order not to not be charged for murder by Hotch...She really wasn't that entertaining.

My Opinion On Prentiss And JJ: Before I start my rant, I would like to just say that this in no way is to be taken as offence towards A.J. Cook and PagetBrewster. I totally love both those actresses and feel horrible that they are losing their positions on the show. I am simply speaking towards the characters of J.J. and Emily Prentiss:

Alright, so like many of you I have recently heard news saying that J.J. and Prentiss will not be with us for season 6. Now one of those names didn't surprise me, and that name is J.J. I mean really you guys, what the hell does she do besides stand there and look pretty? It's in my understanding that her job is to prioritize the cases the team works on and to handle the press. So first of all, anyone can prioritize the cases. I mean really:

"Hm...There are 57 murders in Boston...and 3 murders in Chicago...Which case should I give to Hotch fisrt?"

Sign me up for the FBI people.

So she does that utterly difficult job, along with keeping specific details away from the press. Now, is it just me, or does something along the lines of this happen EVERY. FREAKING. EPISODE. :

Hotch:"JJ, make sure that the press doesn't find out the killer was wearing purple socks when he murdered the ninth victim."

JJ: "Yes sir!"

*Two Fucking Seconds Later*

Random News Reporter: "This just in: The killer was wearing purple socks when he murdered the ninth victim."

JJ: "Oh shit."

Every episode I tell ya, every episode.

Once again I mean no offence to A.J. Cook... I mean offence to the morons who write her dumbass character. I mean don't get be wrong; I like J.J., I just don't see how she contributes to the team.

And then there is Prentiss. Now I like Prentiss a lot, there seems to already be a similar character on the team. Can you guess who it is? It's Hotch! No seriously, it is. Prentiss is nothing more than a female version of Aaron Hotchner. She's a workaholic, very tomboyish, has a strong personality, and doesn't take no for an answer. As much as I admire these traits, and admire her character -- having two of the person kind of slows things down.

Both Paget Brewster and A.J. Cook are beautiful, intelligent, and talented women and I wish them all the best in their future careers.

My 'Avatar: The Last Airbender' Addiction

Favorite Episode(s): The Southern Raiders, The Boiling Rock, and Sozin's Commet.

Favorite Character(s): Prince/Fire Lord Zuko, The Blue Spirit & Princess Azula.

Least Favorite Character(s):Jet (thank god he's dead) and Aang.

Other Characters I Like: Katara, Sokka, Toph, Suki, Ty Lee, Mai, The Bounty Hunter, and Uncle Iroh.

Other Characters I Dislike: Zhao & Fire Lord Ozai.

Favorite Cannon Pairing(s):Sokka/Suki.

Favorite Non-Canon Pairing(s):Zuko/Katara -- what should be canon. Zuko/Ty Lee. Zuko/Suki.

My 'One Life To Live' Obsession

Favorite Story Of The Show: Kyle and Oliver! Duh! Who's pissed they took them off the show? I most certainly am! There's no reason to watch it anymore! Damn homophobes...

Favorite Character(s): Kyle Lewis & Oliver Fish. And ok, I know she's a bitch but c'mon, Stacy is insanely sexy.

Least Favorite Character(s): Nick. And Oliver's Parents.

Other Characters I Like: Skylar, Christian, Layla, Ford, Roxy, and Sierra Rose.

Other Characters I Dislike: Rex, Amy, Mitch Lawrence, and Dorian.

Favorite Cannon Pairing(s):Fish/Kyle, Christian/Layla, Skylar/GiGi

Favorite Non-Cannon Pairing(s): Rex/Amy, Christian/Fish


Keeping You Up-To-Date


August 4th, 2010 --

Yes Yes I am still working on Learning To Love... It will be up soon enough.

But I have decided to venture out of Twilight fan-fiction a little bit because my obsession with Criminal Minds has finally managed to reach an un-healthy level.

Can you say Aaron Hotchner? YUM.

Yes, I dorealize Thomas Gibson is in his mid-40's. Shut the hell up. He's hot, ok?

Anyways...

Point being: I am in the process of writing a CM fanfic. Chapter four of Learning To Love will be coming soon. I am planning to write a Twilight/Criminal Minds Cross-Over.

Huzzah!


July 30th, 2010 --

Yay for procrastination! :D

I should be working on chapter four of Learning To Love right now, but I just finished summer school and have been catching up on my sleep... In other words I'm being a lazy ass.

Anyways... I decided that Intimacy will not be a single One-Shot, but a collection of short and un-related Jasper/Peter drabbles. Yay!

So...yeah.


July 25th, 2010 --

I decided to be ambitious and make a web-page. Yup, I’m that crazy. I really only did it for kicks, heh. It’ll be fun though :) I’ll be putting up reviews for good FanFics I read, blog about story ideas, and post my old stuff on there. Yup, should be fun.

Link: http://sites.google.com/site/eurraleseret/home


July 21st, 2010 --

I feel like I'm blogging...is that bad?

Whatever.

I got a Fiction Press account today! I'm currently working on a story for it...which, obviously, I'm excited about.

...Would it be rude of me to post the link to my profile here? Let me ponder that while I actually do it: www.fictionpress.com/~eurraleseret

Anyways... (you know, I do that a lot. It's like an addiction...)

I decided that my Carlisle Humor fic is definitely post-worthy. The title shall be: 250 Reasons To Knock First. And yes, I do plan to have 250 chapters.

I am that optimistic.

Wow, I'm like such a liar. I'm the most pessimistic person on this planet...

Again with the dot dot dot...


July 19th, 2010 --

Currently feeling the need to update my profile...

Posted two new stories this month! Super happy with myself about that.

Intimacy is a short little Jasper/Peter one-shot; there is just something I really like about that pairing.

Learning To Love (Title in progress...) is a Jasper/Alice fic. All about their journey to the Cullens...yes I know... the plot has been used before...

Oh, I have three new story ideas. Two of which are humor fics so I'm pretty excited about that. I don't want to give away toomuch in case I decide to toss them, but for the humor fics the main characters are going to be Emmett (ha-ha of course) and Carlisle (Oh yes, sexy doctor man can be quite amusing). And then for the third ficit'skindof an angst/humor thing that has to do with Jasper and Peter's friendship. Not slash...though they make one hell-of-a couple. ;)

June 26th, 2010 --

Wow. It certainly has been awhile since I've written anything.

I'd be pleasantly surprised if any of my old readers were still looking into my stuff, and I apologize for my long period of absence . Many may remember that the last update that was placed on all of my stories was an author's note explaining how I needed to be there for my friend during a difficult time. Well I'm pleased to say that everything has been resolved, and everything worked out perfectly fine.

But on a brighter note...I'm back bitches! And my old stories feel played out. I'm going to be spitting out all brand new stuff at you. My style of writing has most definitely changed, but I promise, it’s still me behind the keyboard.

A LOT of my other stories have been taken off this account. I do, however, have backups of every last one of them and might post some of them up here later.

Peace,

Eurral Eseret

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Just Another School to Live Through by caseytabwizz reviews
Bella is a half-blood. She was kicked out of her school in Phoenix because of monsters. So, she moved to live with her dad ,adpotive dad, Charlie. There she meets Edward. What happens when he finds out who she is?
Crossover - Twilight & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,494 - Reviews: 143 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 158 - Updated: 3/16/2013 - Published: 4/11/2009 - Bella, Percy J.
Arguments Between a Vampire and a Werewolf by Angry Lobster reviews
Edward and Jacob argue about sparkling, intimate biting, and various other subjects. Funny drabbles.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 23 - Words: 12,787 - Reviews: 1069 - Favs: 600 - Follows: 389 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Edward, Jacob
What They Heard by Rayne McKenna reviews
The team finds out what really goes bump in the night.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,413 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/5/2010 - S. Reid, D. Morgan - Complete
Jet Lag by seditionary reviews
Challenge entry-Hotch finally gets Spencer where he wants him, but just like that, he's gone again. Hotch discovers that "jet-setting" isn't all it's cracked up to be. Slash!
Criminal Minds - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,631 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 10 - Published: 8/18/2010 - A. Hotchner/Hotch, S. Reid - Complete
Jam and Jelly by the-vampire-act reviews
Drabble. Hotch and Reid have a discussion. Jack decides the winner.
Criminal Minds - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 322 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 5 - Published: 8/10/2010 - S. Reid, A. Hotchner/Hotch - Complete
The Day The Bullpen Stood Still by falcon-121 reviews
A little spoofy one-shot featuring our favorite team. What happens when the liquid that keeps them alive runs out? Read to find out!
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 487 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/30/2010 - Complete
A Perfect Day by Whitlock's War reviews
Two years before the infamous escape of Peter and Charlotte, Jasper shares an experience with Peter that will define their relationship.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,986 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/18/2010 - Jasper, Peter - Complete
Profilers at Play by LostinOblivion reviews
Three days of paperwork leads to antics from two very bored, restless profilers. And, a highly amused tech analyst.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,216 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/13/2010 - D. Morgan, E. Prentiss - Complete
Endless Love by NightLife reviews
This is a bundle of ONESHOTS that i have written about our favourite couple Alice and Jasper. R&R please.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 47,740 - Reviews: 154 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 10/29/2009 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Alice, Jasper
I Bet It Stung by LemonySnickersBars reviews
Twisted little one-shot. Bella fixes Edward.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 259 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 7/16/2009 - Published: 8/12/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
My Final Words by LemonySnickersBars reviews
A Poem In Memory Of The Wonderful Daddy's Little Cannibal.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 413 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Published: 5/24/2009 - Complete
UNCLES by caseytabwizz reviews
Renesmee is in jail. While waiting for her father she gets flashback of things she did as a kid. What will happen? Will dad be mad?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,267 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/10/2009 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Renesmee C./Nessie
Some Schools Dont Have Layouts by caseytabwizz reviews
Edward and Rosalie are supposed to be each others mates. It does not work out. They act for the family to see them happy. What happens when a strange pair of brother and sister come to town?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,326 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 4/10/2009 - Edward, Rosalie
Pursuing Passion by passion assassin reviews
Edward is seduced by a human and her blood- not Bella. Unable to contain himself, he changes her and was stopped by Rosalie and Emmett before he drained her. But she is desperately in love with him and attempts suicide after changing. James kidnaps her...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,072 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/28/2009 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Edward, Rosalie
Josef & the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day by NeteleJala reviews
ONE-SHOT. Just what it sounds like.
Moonlight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,592 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 3 - Published: 2/27/2008 - Josef K. - Complete
Just Chillin by NeteleJala reviews
ONE-SHOT. Josef and his freezer.
Moonlight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,058 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/18/2008 - Josef K., Mick S. J. - Complete
Get a Clue by Melismata Maiden reviews
[CRIMINAL MINDS] The BAU works late on Thanksgiving to finish up an important case...sort of. ONESHOT
Criminal Minds - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,009 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 7 - Published: 11/25/2005 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Pardon reviews
Morgan sniffed, using his shoulder to try and casually brush away the tears that had started to form. God, he felt pathetic. Crying in front of his superior…he couldn't go any lower.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,272 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 20 - Published: 8/18/2010 - D. Morgan, A. Hotchner/Hotch - Complete
Damn You Derek Morgan reviews
After Reid gives the diagnosis of what seems to be a bump on Emily's wrist, Morgan offers to carry out one of the home remedies. Hilarity ensues.
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,033 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/12/2010 - E. Prentiss, D. Morgan - Complete
Learning To Love reviews
I knew it was strange for me to be thinking this way. To think that I may have a purpose in life besides killing, and bringing despair onto the world. It was strange for me to have such optimism, such…hope. Jasper and Alice's journey to the Cullens.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,629 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/23/2010 - Published: 7/2/2010 - Alice, Jasper
Intimacy reviews
This wasn't a brotherly embrace. This wasn't the type of hug you gave an old friend, no matter how long it's been since you've seen them. No, this definitely wasn't it. This was different.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 533 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/1/2010 - Jasper, Peter - Complete