The Obsidian Blade
hide bio
Poll: What regalia should be Naruto's? Vote Now!
PM . Follow . Favorite
Joined 10-15-08, id: 1717653, Profile Updated: 04-14-09
Author has written 16 stories for Naruto, MÄR, Fullmetal Alchemist, Rosario + Vampire, Fable, Air Gear, Bleach, Final Fantasy: Tactics Advance, One Piece, and Eureka Seven.

Yo. the names Joseph (apply any last name you wish). There are a lot of things that i want to use to take your time.

My likes:Rock (I am more of a rocker than anything else)
Kick as manga(got to love the shit that people come up with)
Pizza
Ramen
Family
Friends
My friends take over the world plan and my blow up the world plan

Dislikes:Bad movies such as Bloody Malory (Do not watch it)
The way Kishimato centers the whole show about Sasuke
Back stabbers
Therapists (who does not hate those bastards who tell you how to be happy)
Hypocrites (most of America and its government)
Rap

Favorite pairings listed from 1-10 1 being the best:

Naruto/Kurenai 1
Naruto/Kyuubi(FEMALE) 2
Naruto/Itachi(FEAMLE) 3
Naruto/Ayame(Underestimated pairings are the best) 4
Naruto/Shion 5
Naruto/Shikimaru(FEAMLE never seen it happen but it would be great if someone did) 6
Naruto/Koyuki 7
Naruto/Hana 8
Naruto/Haku 9
Naruto/Kushina (I personaly do not care for incest because it is like telling some one who not to love) 10

Most hated pairings:

Naruto/Sakure (Never going to happen)
Naruto/Hinata (She is way to shy for that to happen)
Naruto/Hinabi (She is way to young)
Naruto/Sasuke (Sure I will occasionally read a FEMSasuke but when it is a real good fic bu to if he is the same old dick then hell fucking no)
Naruto/Yaoi (I am strait so I will never ever write that shit)

Favorite Characters:

Shikamaru
Choji
Naruto
Kakashi(I teeter with him between thrashing the fuck out of him an d liking him)
Ichigo
Dart
Lloyd
Lavitz
Android 13
Gohan
A whole bunch of other characters that I can not remember for the life of me

Most hated characters:

Sasuke
Orochimaru
Sakura
Sandaime
Asuma
Some people that i really can't think of right now

Rant:What the fuck is wrong with fangirls. they have their own websites to post yoai yet they have to over run the websites that do not have blocks for it? What kind of bullshit is that? I mean come on. they have there own fucking websites for it. why the fuck do they need to over run every god damned website with it. i have nothing wrong with homosexuals but there has to be a line drawn sometime.

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this and if you almost cried post this in your profile

Naruto fanfics are over populated by yaoi, primarily NaruSasu. If you believe me put this on your profile.
By Order of ChaosLink

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai, Vert9411, pinkcherryblossom, 225CherryBlossoms016, SakuraUchiha14,Sakura-Cherry-Blossom-Chan,Sasusakufan2357, uchihasakura285, NarutoFanGurly, Fallen-Ryu, The Obsidian Blade

This story is about a little girl that was abused. If you care about it, and want things like this to stop then copy and paste it to your profile.

My name is sarah I am but three,

My eyes are swollen I cannot see,

I must be stupid I must be bad,

What else could have made My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong

Or else I'm locked up All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight, don't make a sound!

I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse my name he calls

I press myself Against the wall.

I try and hide From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more,

I finally get free And I run for the door.

He's already locked it And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late

His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain again and again

Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy, Murdered me.

Child Abuse, MAKE IT STOP!

This is weird, but interesting! If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed erveylteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt!Paste this to your profile if you can read this!

Girl: Slow down!

Guy: No this is fun!

Girl: No it's not! Please, it's way to scary!

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you. Now slow down.

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gave him a big hug.

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself? It's bothering me.

In the newspaper, the next day, a motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure.

Two people were on it and only one survived.

The truth was, that half way down the road the guy realized his breaks were out and he didn't want the girl to know.

Instead, he had her hug him and tell him she loved him one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so she would live even if it meant he would die.

If you would do the same for the person you love, copy and paste this into your profile.

(+'.'+) This is Bunny. Copy and paste bunny
(")_(") into your profile to help him gain world domination!

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man barried her while she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school
He told his friends that it was cool
And when he pulled the trigger back
It shot with a great crack
Mummy I was a good girl
I did what I was told
I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold
But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye
I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry
When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another
And all because he got the gun from his older brother
Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much
And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush
And tell my little sister that she is the only one now
And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now
And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best
Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest
Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class
And never to forget this and please don't let this pass
Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this
Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss
And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try
I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry
Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest
But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest
Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack
Mummy listen to me if you would
I wanted to go to college
I wanted to try things that were new
I guess I'm not going with daddy
On that trip to the new zoo
I wanted to get married
I wanted to have a kid
I wanted to be an actress
Mummy I wanted to live
But mummy I must go now
The time is getting late
Mummy tell my Chris
I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date
I love you mummy I always have
I know you know it's true
Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you"
In memory of the Columbian students that were lost
Please if you would
Pass this around
I'd be happy if you could
Don't smash this on the ground
If you pass this on
Maybe people will cry
Just keep this in heart
For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye"
Now you have two choices
1) repost and show you care
2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart
(Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)

U say Zac I say drowning pool!!
U say Pink I say BLACK!
U say Michael Jackson I say...wtf?...
U say flo riders I say korn!
92 of teens now like pop and rap ...If U are one of the 8 that likes metal...copy and paste...;)

My Fictionpress

sword that Naruto uses in The Life of a Ninja Pirate (apply alterations as told in story)

symbol used to describe the one on ed's jacket in The Frozen Heart Alchemist

sword used by Ochita Tenshi

Bahamut in Mar's Maelstrom

The guitar naruto uses in The Kitsune in Yokai Academy

Trivium symbol

SOil

unReal

Redefine

Jaded

True Self

Deny Me

Halo

Motley Crue

Saints of Los Angeles

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Cursed Snake Love by DarkKesono reviews
After being pushed into a snaked-filled cave, Naruto finds a woman that just might change his life. NarutoXDemonic Harem
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,822 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 154 - Updated: 6/6/2012 - Published: 12/13/2008
Naruto Muyo! by NeroSparda reviews
Ever wonder what would it have been like if Naruto was in Tenchi Masaki's shoes? Well here's a story where Yosho crashed along with Ryoko on his planet. Things will get interesting for our blond hero, don't you think? Narutox? probably a harem.
Crossover - Tenchi Muyo & Naruto - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 42,139 - Reviews: 209 - Favs: 444 - Follows: 467 - Updated: 6/5/2012 - Published: 2/28/2008 - Ryoko, Naruto U.
Naruto: A Shinigami's Awakening by Narutomaniac reviews
Naruto is betrayed by someone close to him. In a rage he awakens Shinigami powers. It'll start in the Narutoverse then go into the Bleach universe. Naruto/Fem. Haku and depending on poll in my profile maybe two Bleach girls. Longer summary inside.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,757 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 363 - Updated: 1/30/2011 - Published: 6/2/2008 - Naruto U., Haku
VocaLeaf by Raizashi reviews
During a Vocaloid Concert, Something goes wrong and a Rift between dimensions opens up and sucks Miku in. The dimension on the other side of the rift just happened to be the world of Naruto, where she instantly falls for our favorite blond hero. added rin
Crossover - Naruto & Vocaloid - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,630 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 9/25/2009 - Published: 8/10/2009 - Naruto U., Miku H.
New Life, new fight! by Zaara the black reviews
Naruto is tired of konoha so he decides that Kyubi can help him out. Naruto is transported to the Pokegirl world. A place full of Adventure, a place full of daring, a place full of sexy women! Naruto x harem
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 31,070 - Reviews: 241 - Favs: 781 - Follows: 763 - Updated: 7/31/2009 - Published: 6/18/2009 - Naruto U., Anko M.
Naruto's Fable by Nexusdragon reviews
At the Valley of the End, team 7 is ripped through dimensions by the collision of jutsu and dropped into the guild woods. Will they ever make it home, or will they have to get comfortable in this strange new world? Pairings undecided
Crossover - Naruto & Fable - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,370 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 4/26/2009 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Naruto U., Whisper
Of Heros and Demons by DoomReaverX reviews
Fem Naruxvery powerfull occ slight x over and sasuke bashing later on and demonic lemon in first chap. possible preg Write reviews if you want me to continue. first fan fic
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,813 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/15/2009 - Published: 3/11/2009 - Naruto U., Sakura H.
What Now by Tsuki-Assassin reviews
In a different dimension and dead whats naruto gotten himself into now. Bleach crossover, Naru/Harem 3 girls
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 20,522 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 161 - Follows: 206 - Updated: 10/6/2008 - Published: 4/28/2008 - Naruto U.
From leader to Tamer by Mark20020 reviews
Deciding he had enough of Konoha for his services Naruto the Rokudaime hokage leaves Konoha out of boredom in the strangest of ways. With a scroll signed Sukebe Naruto uses a technique and ends up in the pokegirl world. summary in profile lemons i guess
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 60,958 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 833 - Follows: 880 - Updated: 4/25/2008 - Published: 10/22/2007 - Naruto U.
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Lazy Maelstrom reviews
All legends carve their names into the stone of time. Be it grudging, willing, or lazy, each legend does it. The ironic part is that the one who does it lazily is the one that has the most impact. I am Nara Naruto, and I have the lazy signature in time.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 11 - Words: 35,806 - Reviews: 216 - Favs: 470 - Follows: 490 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 11/25/2008 - Naruto U., Kurenai Y.
The Demon Hunter and the Shingami reviews
The summery is inside if you want to know. The crossover between Bleach and Naruto happens around chapter four and it is completely different from any others that you have seen. Naruto/Harem. I hope you guys like it and do not forget to review!
Crossover - Naruto & Bleach - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 8 - Words: 21,299 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Naruto U., Yoruichi S.
Mar's Spiral reviews
It's a gamble. The gate could take Mar's worst enemy or someone who can't fight. The Gate Keeper Clown isn't very picky on who he lets pass through its gate. tonight it chose someone who wanted it, a new chance at life, a chance to live, Naruto Uzumaki
Crossover - Naruto & MÄR - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 69,989 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 330 - Follows: 244 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Naruto U., Dorothy
Keeper of the Crimson Path reviews
It was tiresome to be in that place. I know that they will send after me and I want them to. I am going to cleave them one by one when they get near. But the world that I escaped to is something different. For right now, I will leave my mark in AT world.
Crossover - Naruto & Air Gear - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 25,857 - Reviews: 206 - Favs: 403 - Follows: 397 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 3/31/2009 - Naruto U., Rika N.
Fabled Love reviews
Series of oneshots that are with creatures. For those who love demon and monster pairings check this out for we have the bigest amount in one place. No yaoi. Visit my site for more pics homepage. Furry or Anthro porn
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 24,539 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 134 - Updated: 7/4/2010 - Published: 5/30/2009 - Naruto U., Kyuubi/Kurama
Fox of Metal reviews
Wow, never thought of myself ending up like this. In a nbew world through my own stupidity, messing up on a seal. Turns out, the Hiraishin will not just teleport you to just the marked area but across the universe. Kami I hate karma. N/E/T/ maybe others
Crossover - Naruto & Eureka Seven - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,600 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 100 - Published: 8/13/2009 - Naruto U., Eureka
The Imperfect Sight reviews
Sight is not perfect unless it is the sight of Kami. But we offten confuse our sight with hers. It is those who do not that become the true keeper of justice. I and the other eight have excepted it. We are the ones with the imperfect sight. Naru/Harem
Crossover - Naruto & Bleach - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,856 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 176 - Updated: 8/11/2009 - Published: 6/21/2009 - Naruto U., T. Harribel
Wrath of the Forsaken reviews
We are forgotten in the homes, left to rot away our years of life. We are coming back before death and staring in the eyes, denying it. We are the forsaken. Not a WOW crossover.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 9,890 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 59 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Naruto U., Anko M.
Life of a Ninja Pirate reviews
He had been sent on a suicide mission yet he returned. The things that he returned to made him snap, turning him Nuke Nin. With Konan by his side, he will take the sea by storm. He is Namikaze Naruto, the Ninja Pirate
Crossover - Naruto & One Piece - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,572 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 153 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Naruto U., Robin
Clan Maelstrom reviews
We fight with are last breath. For a better tomorrow or just for ourselves we fight. We fight this war with many goals but we fight with one objective. TAKE DOWN THE QUEEN. Naruto/Final Fantasy x-over. pairings inside. Read and Review please.
Crossover - Naruto & Final Fantasy: Tactics Advance - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 18,088 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 38 - Published: 5/26/2009 - Naruto U.
The Boy Who Became a Legend reviews
A repost of the story I made a while back. If you want a synopsis of it or something, check out josephx .webs .com remove spaces and it should be there. So please read and review
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,482 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 49 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Naruto U., Kyuubi/Kurama
The Kitsune in Yokai Academy reviews
Uhm, yeah. I honestly don't have a summery for this one. I could not come up with one. Just no that this is a Naruto/Rosario Vampire cross over and help me out with this one. Extreme OOC Naruto
Crossover - Naruto & Rosario + Vampire - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 63,874 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 513 - Follows: 423 - Updated: 4/28/2009 - Published: 3/2/2009 - Naruto U., Moka A.
Heroes of Albion reviews
Second chances are rare to be given. When they are, it is usually to those who walk a certain line. Only a few people take it though. This is the story of one who did take that second chance. This is the story of Namikaze Naruto, hero of Albion!
Crossover - Naruto & Fable - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,110 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 138 - Follows: 168 - Updated: 4/15/2009 - Published: 3/27/2009 - Naruto U., Theresa
Naruto gets Tora as a 'Pet' reviews
There is a demon running loose in Konoha. But it is not Naruto or the Kyuubi. It is our very own Tora! See how she gets her man. Wait her! What is wrong with the auther and what is wrong with this summery. Need someone to come up with it as I no good.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,732 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 275 - Follows: 251 - Updated: 4/15/2009 - Published: 3/12/2009 - Naruto U., Tora
When Dreams Become Reality reviews
Naruto has been having dreams of a great soldier in battle in his dreams. What happens if this soldier apears to be more than just a mere dream but his incarnate. The world changes around him and everything falls into place. Not good with summaries.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,968 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 3/13/2009 - Published: 11/11/2008 - Naruto U., Kurenai Y.
The Frozen Heart Alchemist reviews
Naruto was born of two worlds. These two wolds had completely different concepts. Watch as Naruto, Edward, and Alphonse struggle to gain the concept and make it their own. Not everything is as it seems and why should this be any different? read n' review.
Crossover - Naruto & Fullmetal Alchemist - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,789 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 3/13/2009 - Published: 1/25/2009 - Naruto U., Rose