Author has written 5 stories for Harry Potter.
Yes, Teufel1987 is a "he" ... he is *insert number here* years old as indicated by the four numbers followed by his username ...
Teufel1987 also wonders why people keep thinking he is a she at times and not a he ... he hopes it isn't his writing ...
In case you are curious, Teufel is German for the Devil (yeah I was 15 and in a German phase when I came up with that) ... there is also a vague association between Teufel and my real name ... an inside private joke and a by-product of my twisted humour ... which is why the word is used now ...
FYI it is pronounced Toy-fell
Added on the 9th of March 2014:
Normally, I don't bother with guest reviews. Aside from the good ones or the ones with proper constructive criticism, which I keep, I delete those that I consider ... frivolous.
But this review (for chapter five of Rise of the Wizards) really had me laughing my arse off. So much so, that I decided to make an exception!
Here it is:
It took me a moment to figure out that this fellow was talking about the kittens in Umbridge's plates ...
In essence, those animals are basically not real in a world that is not real.
I guess that makes them not real squared in real world terms.
Added on the 21st of July 2014
I am now a member of Critics United.
I don't understand "MPreg" stories.
Why would anyone write about Male Pregnancy?
Someone really needs to walk me through this logic.
Because as a person who has done a masters in biosciences, I can genuinely say that in my professional opinion, it is impossible to have a pregnant male human being that can give birth to a living healthy baby.
It is also my professional opinion that people who write MPreg stories are not well-versed in biology. Which I personally feel is sad...
Now, I am not saying that they don't know the basics (i.e. the whole "birds and the bees" affair) but that doesn't make them "well-versed".
Because a person well-versed in biology will never write MPreg.
Say, that you have a male character that gets pregnant. Fine, let's drop all logic and suspend disbelief for one insane moment and go with that .
Now, to house a foetus, this male would naturally need ... let's call it a "compartment" in his body.
You know what, actually? "Compartment" sounds too crude, how about we try another word? "Uterus" sounds like a good one!
Now, naturally, to get a foetus, you need an embryo, for an embryo, you need a pair of gametes. Naturally, one of those gametes will have to come from ... let's call the person a "host". So one of these gametes comes from the "host".
Now, the "host" needs an organ to store and secrete his gametes that will give a bouncing baby. Outside the body doesn't work because then the person might be rendered infertile the minute the baby's big head comes out. Besides, where will it hang? Also, as the person carrying the baby, the host will need to supply oxygen to the zygote/embryo/foetus. Furthermore, he'll need a large gamete that can stay in his body to be fertilized. Therefore those organs will have to be somewhere inside ... nicely tucked out of the way ... concealed, if you will.
How about we call the organs "ovaries" and the gametes "ova" for fun?
The two gametes to meet somewhere, and the baby has to come out from somewhere. A passage of sorts, if you will, leading out of the "uterus" to the outside world.
For simplicity's sake, because nature and evolution don't like being impractical, one passage will serve the dual purpose of fertilisation and birth.
Let us call this passage a "vagina".
Now, a human being with a working uterus, ovaries, and a freaking vagina is known as a FEMALE!
Males happen to have mammary glands too, ours are just vestigial. But they are there nonetheless. Also, in the right conditions, you will find that they can lactate too.
Males also secrete oestrogen just like females. And female bodies happen to secrete testosterone as well.
The male testes and the female ovaries are homologous (look up that word if you don't get what it means). As are the male penis and female clitoris.
In other words, aside from their ability to have babies, there is little to no difference between a woman and a man!
We even start life as females! It is only later on in the gestation period that the hormones make a baby a boy.
Also, here's what Cambridge Online Dictionary has to say about the word "female":
adjective /ˈfiːmeɪl/ belonging to the sex that can have babies
And here's what Oxford dictionary has to say about it.
Therefore, by definition, logic, and science, a human being or any mammal on this earth that can have real live babies (i.e. become pregnant) is female!
Thus, MPreg does not work. The minute a character becomes pregnant, they are instantly female!
Changing the gender of a character to female; fine. It may not be something that I would read, but I don't mind it. This however...
Unless we are talking about members of the family Syngnathidae (i.e. Sea Horses) IT. IS. IMPOSSIBLE.
Added on the 4th of April 2015
Over the years, I have read and proofread many stories. Mainly (alright, all) in English.
I have noticed a few quirks over the years in the way people write based on which region they come from.
So, I thought, for your viewing pleasure, I would share…
Of course, it goes without saying that there is no offence meant. All of this is in jest, and most are observations. It certainly does not apply to the entire demographic. Exceptions are there to every rule, after all.
1. USA: Now, of course, I know what you are thinking, "They all use color instead of colour". While that is mostly true, I find that many people from other parts of the globe have "gone American" or (in my words) use Americanese.
So what distinguishes an American from someone using Americanese? (To those Americans reading this, if you lot can call British English "British" then I can call what you use "Americanese"… so there!)
These guys don’t use one system of spelling (i.e. American or British). While some may show obvious flaws in their syntax and grammar, there are others who are pretty good at the language. Regardless, there are some little things you can spot.
Aside from using what I call proper spellings (colour, honour etc.) there is one quirk that really screams “I am a Brit”:
Sat, and stood: If you see these words being used instead of “was sitting” or “was standing” you can be assured that the fellow writing is British and not Australian or from New Zealand. Examples: “He was sat at the table.”, “they were stood near the lake”.
Indians, like Europeans, have a varied and non-standard type of spelling. Some use the British system, and some use the American. But there are some characteristics that unify those of Indian origin, regardless of their country of residence.