Chizune-chan
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Joined 11-15-08, id: 1742932, Profile Updated: 02-16-10
Author has written 1 story for D.Gray-Man.

Konichiwa, Bitches! I'm Chizune-chan, more commonly known as Gummibear, Moyashi, Shorty, Midget, Beansprout, Chi-chan, Chi, or Heather. I have another account for my warriors fanfics. It's Feathersong, so if you wanna read those, go ahead. I made this one for my other various fanfics, and more importantly, my Yaoi. Yes, I am a yaoi fangirl. No, I don't care what you think of that.

Oh, and about my nicknames, call me Chi-chan, please. No one can call me the first five unless I personally know you and you know me, blah blah blah. Those are special names. I'm pretty damn sweet-most of the time. But hey, you probably don't know my def. of sweet. My definition of the word sweet: stealing your coffee when your not looking, strangling your best friend for no reason, shoving trash into a random locker without a lock, having conversations on a classroom desk, calling people lazy asses, spilling water on peoples' heads on 'accident', attempting to break someone's wrist just because you wanna see if you're strong enough to do so, etc. That's my definition, cause I've done all of those things, and more.

But I'm also a wee bit crazy. Ask my friends. They'll tell you the same. I'm a dominant person, but I'm sure as hell not a leader. But then, I'm not a follower either. I go with my own path, and if someone wants to take me there, or follow me, I could care less, depending on the person. I'm naturally hyper, and I love sweets. I hate anything I'm forced to do- like PE. If you force me to place football, I'll be lazy and not do it. Give me a sub in PE who tells us to play football and she has no idea what she's doing, me and my friends work up a sweat tackling each other and playing keep away when its a game of two hand touch, no tackling foot ball only.

I hate rules, and I hate being told what to do. Chances are, I won't do it unless you tell me not to. Yell at me, and I'll do the opposite of what you're yelling at me to do. Ask me nicely, yeah, I'll probably consider it, and there's a ninety percent chance I'll do it because you asked. See what a nice person I can be? Sometimes, my friends have called me a selfless person. I deny that with 200 power. I drown in selfishness. I hate sharing, and my pride is my everything. I love eating, and i hate my own jealousy. I'm a lazy ass unless you give me twenty packs of sugar (but you won't see me cause I'll be peeing the entire time from a sugar rush). Flirting is fun, but that's all I do- no dating, or anything like that. Hurt my friends, you're gonna die. I don't care what happens to me back, but you are going to die a painful death. And those are my sins- my seven deadly sins. I love my sins, and I do have my virtues too. But who cares about them. They can kiss my caramel colored ass and find someone else to bug.

And yes, my ass really is caramel colored- half of my body is. My mum is Italian and German and crap, and my dad is Brown (people say black, but he looks brown to me, so that's what he is). My hair is deep brown, my skin is half caramel, half peach (depends on what had contact with sunlight), and my eyes are chocolate brown. They change to light brown when I'm pissed. Isn't that all peachy wonderful?

I've reread this so many times now, and I realize I made myself seem rather confident. Well, I'm really self-conscious. I'm often shy around strangers, and I don't like talking to adults unless I know them well. And there are so many things I'd love to do, like wear a skirt or dress to school, or wear my hair down for once since I usually only have it up in two braids, but I honestly fear that I will be laughed at. I hate being laughed at. It's really cruel, and I hate when cruelty is directed towards me because I'm slightly different. I've kinda learned to ignore it, but not completely.

I'm a big crybaby (I'm an emotional person, okay?), to put it bluntly. I cry a lot, although I tend to attempt to hold it in most of the time. I cry really easily when put on the spot and accused of something I never did, and I can lie really good. I'd be a really good actress if it wasn't for the fact that I can't do things in front of large crowds unless I'm with a large group of people. Thus, if I don't have a friend with me, I tend to be really quiet and shy. I hate it when people assume things about me when they don't know me at all. For example, just because I like reading, does not mean I like doing book reports. I had some people talking behind my back about that just because I didn't want to do a book report, but I read like crazy. And I hate that just because I'm quiet around someone I barely know, that stranger assumes I'm all innocent and sweet and that I'm an easy target.

I also hate when I get really thoughtful, and I'm just thinking about an idea for a poem, or a story or even a picture I want to draw, and people come up and ask why I'm so sad. And even when I tell them I'm fine, they still bug me about it. It's like 'FUCK! Leave me alone and let me think! Damn it, God! Just go!' And sometimes I get random because I'm slightly bipolar, so one moment I'll be thoughtful, and the next I'll be very violent. And they assume 'Oh! She's really mad today beucase she's violent!' I'm not mad, I just want my way or you'll get a foot up your ass. Just becuase I hate it when I don't get my way, doesn't mean I'm a stuck up brat either. Cuase I'm not. I'm far from that.

I'm a highly suicidal person, but I'm to afraid of after life to ever attempt to kill myself. Yeah, I'm pretty contradicting, huh? Oh, and a random addition to this paragraph, I don't take any pills what so ever becuase my mother and grandmother think I'm just the average teen female who's happy and what not. It's a facade I often wear in front of people. A therapist would do me some good, if you know what I mean. But on the internet, I can totally be myself, cause I know I don't really have to worry about judgment. And I can easily gain courage to tell someone off on the internet. But real life, that's a whole other story, as I put like, a couple paragraphs up. Oh, and I say the word 'like' a lot, but don't call me a fucking valley girl or a prep just beucase of it!

Sometimes, I get really depressed, and I already know the cause. It's my loneliness. I get really lonely, really easy. If I'm in my room, I get really lonely, and then I start thinking. For all of you- the ones I know, and the ones I don't know, I'm gonna tell you my weakness. It's not like you can use it against me, cause you won't know how to unless you know me, but my weakness in my thoughts. Never leave me alone with my thoughts. They're the reason I want to die.

But there are two people in this world who can cure my mind- the ones who make me forget to think. Shauna and Jesse- my two best friends. Shauna's my awesome best friend that I've known since fourth grade, and at first we hated each other, and now we're best friends. I thank her so much. I can tell her anything, and I mean anything. Jesse is someone I meet maybe two years ago over the internet. just like Shauna, I can tell her anything, and she cheers me up all the time. She helped me learn to write yaoi, and made me the skilled writer I am today. I owe my life to these two, so thank you. If you need anything, just ask me. I'll do my best to do it~!

Well, for now, that's gonna be it, because I have to finish writing before Jesse beats me with a spatula. I'll update soon, well, as soon as I finish he chapters and what not. XD I'm really lazy, so expect it in a week or two...or three...I'm a procrastinator, if you haven't figured that out. So yeah. See you in the reviews and messages.

In the mean time, here are some copy/pastes and crap like that to keep you busy!

See ya~

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I es slightly Turkish.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".

I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I have had people assume that I'm not a virgin when I am.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.

I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.

I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude

Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.

I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7

I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA

I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
bitch, I'm part brown!
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon

I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot. (Why does everyone think that bisexuals are sluts? it makes me so sad :( )
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.

I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
Only the people who REALLY piss me off.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.

I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.

I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts
It's actually called a kilt
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.

I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.

I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED

I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.

I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
strong mentally, only slightly physically.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.

I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.

I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON"T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist or a pyromaniac.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile

If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself. So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

A true friend is someone who will try to answer the "eraser bits" question and have a long conversation about it. A friend is someone who won't say anything when you cry for no reason, but will start sobbing to, just help you cry. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this in your profile.

For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord.

Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

Lewis's Law of Travel:
The first piece of luggage out of the chute doesn't belong to anyone, ever.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

If it works, rip it apart and find out why.

If you believe that the pink bunnies of doom are really out to get you copy and paste this onto your profile

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

if they are right... copy and paste this into your profile. lI understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no fucking way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why isn't notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I'll tell you why: because paper can't beat anybody; a rock would tear that shit up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shit, I'm sorry. I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!"

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now. If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile.

If you dance in the shower, copy this into your profile.

If you are a chocoholic copy this into your profile

If you solemly swear you are up to no good copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile.

Anime is Life. Manga is life. Life is good. Parents suck for not buying you more life. If you agree, copy and paste this to your profile

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

My name is sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cant see,must be stupid, I must be bad,

What else could have made My daddy so mad

I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me

I can't speak at all I can't do a thing wrong

Or else I'm locked All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark My folks aren't home

When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just get one whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound! I just heard a car

My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar

I hear him curse My name he calls

I press myself Against the wall

I try and hide From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid I'm starting to cry

He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault That he suffers at work

He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more,I finally get free And I run for the door

He's already locked it And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken

"I'm sorry!", I scream But its was much too late

His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate

The hurt and the pain Again and again

Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor

My name is Sarah And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy, Murdered me.

If you think that child abuse is wrong and should be stopped, copy and paste this poem into your profile.

According to the latest figures, 43 percent of all statistics are utterly worthless.

Don't steal. The government hates the competition.

If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.

Tell the truth and run.

Smile! It makes them wonder what you're up to.

Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate.

Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense..

Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.

Generally, generalizations are wrong.

Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make ye mad.

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research.

Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts.

The Truth is out there. So what are you doing here?

If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over.

Whatever you are, be a good one.

You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.

We are the people our parents warned us about.

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.

The difficulty is not so great as to die for a friend, as to find a friend worth dying for.

Belief gets in the way of learning.

If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done?

When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.

Enjoy every minute of life. There's plenty of time to be dead.

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years.

We don't live in the world of reality, we live in the world of how we percieve reality.

If God had intended Man to smoke, he would have set him on fire.

A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.

Have the courage to live. Anyone can die.

Education is important. School, however, is another matter.

When a finger points at the moon, the imbecile looks at the finger.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to change it every 2 months.

Cynics are made, not born.

Maybe this world is another planet's hell.

I found these on someone's profile and thought they really funny. If you thought they were funny and started laughing while reading them like I did, copy and paste them into your profile.

On a Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping. (that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos!
..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap:
"Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners:
"Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):
"Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
"Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
"Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:
"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:
"Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights:
"For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts:
"Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news fl ash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume:
"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

On T-Rat (Military food):
Its not for Human Consumption, Animals and Military Use only... (Umnn yeah... isn't military also human)

If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing about Iggy, post this in your profile.

If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a detention or library copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever read past two AM in the morning copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped up the stairs copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever tripped down the stairs copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent of American Teens would die if Abecrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath. Copy this into your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent who would laugh there asses off.

Copy and Paste this if you go and read your story on the site the second it is posted.

If you think the following story is sad copy and paste it in your profile

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge .

Mommy, I was a good , I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big , I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If you think that Pokemon is cool, copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you have ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this to your profile.

Help Pokemon rule the world!! Copy and paste this into your profile. :D

RACISM IS WRONG!

Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message and my symbol for equality to your profile.

How to Tell if You're a Writer

-If you talk to yourself.
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’)
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’)
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-If you tend to collect the Bic Stics people leave lying around, kind of like picking pennies off the ground.
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.
-If people think you might have A.D.D.
-If you think it’d be cool to have A.D.D.
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.
-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you failed English 101

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you ever had a crush on one of your friends copy this into your profile

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE

If you eat carbs and are proud, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think you can be pretty without being self-centered, copy and paste this into your profile

If you don't know why people can't get it through their heads that members of the opposite sex can just be friends, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever done something embarrassing in front of your crush, copy and paste this into your profile

Stop Flamers Now!

No more shall we tolerate flamers that flame for stupid reasons such as for pairings, who wrote the story, and just because they can!

Copy and paste this into your profile if you want to join the organization called "Stop Flamers Now"

yeah, i am against flamers. i am for constructive criticism, though. if you want to copy and paste this, go ahead.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

Just because we eat animals for food doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc. copy this into your profile! Did you know that to get the fur, they club, drown, and anal eletrocute the poor animals. And why are they so cruel? Because they don't want to ruin the furs!(o_O) Now copy this into your freakin' profile!

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, and Baa Baa Black Sheep had the same tune, and were all composed by Mozart. (Mozart? Really?)

30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you get a kick out of explosions, copy and paste this to your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

I solemly swear that anyone who flames my stories will get a flame back. FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE! BEAT OUT THE FLAMES! If you agree (or hate flamers), copy this into your profile.

If you're easily confussed or confuzzled add this to your profile.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile

you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever begged your parents for something so much they get frustrated and buys you the thing you were begging for copy and paste this to your profile.

SMILEYS RULE!!:):)copy and paste this in your profile if you agree. :):):):):):)!!

U P D A T E S

The Yullen Files~ Chapter Two is being written right now. It's almost done, but I don't know how it'll turn out since I haven't read DGM in so long. Plus, I'm not really in a 'Yulleny' mood at this moment, so...hiatus anyone? -2/16/10

A Twist of Fate~ I'll update this depending on how good people think this is. xD It's so old, but I totally wanna have fun with this and wing it. -2/16/10

C O M I N G S O O N

The Kyuki Files~ This is gonna be my Kyo x Yuki yaoi oneshot fanfiction! I don't know if it'll be a bunch of oneshots or just one yet. XP

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Stuck by Hawkear of WindClan reviews
Axel cooks breakfast for Roxas...AkuRoku, mentioned Zemyx, yaoi, slight lemon, AU, odd use of Maple Syrup. Anyone notice how I like using food products? Written for Chifox-and-Waffleferret who accidentally gave me the idea. XD
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,371 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/31/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
A Dollop of Daisy by Hawkear of WindClan reviews
Axel is watching TV alone on a hot summer day when the classic Daisy Sour Cream commercial comes on, giving our favorite Flurry of Dancing Flames an idea...yaoi, lemon, RokuAku, AU, odd use of sour cream. :3
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,907 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/23/2009 - Roxas, Axel - Complete
Interrupted by Naive-Symphony reviews
Roxas really needed to get the message across that an unlocked door was not an invitation. Belated 8/13 fic, enjoy!
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,831 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/21/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
Learning to Share by Ravyn Skye reviews
Inucest Gift Fic for Vexed Wench. Post-Canon. On the eve of his wedding to Kagome, Inuyasha realizes he has more than one option, he doesn't have to settle for Kagome, just so he won't be alone. Warnings: Kagome bashing, Inucest, Yaoi, Polyamory, LEMON
Inuyasha - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,777 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 26 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Sesshomaru, Inuyasha - Complete
Camera Never Lies by Sami-Band reviews
Akuroku Oneshot. Dedicated to terra hotaru. Axel works in a chemist. A too hot chemist with no air conditioning and he's bored. Luckily for him an even hotter blonde customer is just as equally bored and willing to help him out. Story is better. M rated.
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,234 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 7 - Published: 4/21/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
Until Morning Comes by Loveless Stray reviews
Roxas has to spend the night in a haunted mansion by himself. Or at least he thought it would be by himself. Who else is in the mansion with him? Is it a ghost, or another living person? Pairing: RoxasxAxel YAOI OneShot
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,487 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/17/2009 - Roxas, Axel - Complete
Outcasts by LookOutShe'sGotAPen reviews
Two broken, lonely hearts find each other after heartbreak befalls them both... will Kyo finally allow himself to love again? And will Ana ever forgive herself? KyoxOC.
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 10 - Words: 23,517 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 3/31/2009 - Published: 3/10/2009 - Kyo S. - Complete
Dirty Pictures and Dirty Minds by GrasperGroupie reviews
Axel uploads a few surprise pictures to Roxas' laptop that provoke steamy results. If you like yaoi, you're gonna hug me for this : AkuRoku, college aged
Kingdom Hearts - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,281 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 184 - Follows: 6 - Published: 3/27/2009 - Axel, Roxas - Complete
If This, Then That by And Thus- I Fangirled reviews
Kyo always wondered why Yuki never cared enough to come up to the roof. Yuki/Kyo one-shot fluff and shounen-ai, you've been warned.
Fruits Basket - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,634 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 3/13/2009 - Published: 2/19/2009 - Yuki S., Kyo S. - Complete
Old Times by Eireka reviews
Yuki missed the old times when he and Kyo didn't hate each other. Kyo missed them too.
Fruits Basket - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 476 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/3/2008 - Kyo S., Yuki S. - Complete
The Yullen Files reviews
Allen finally tells Kanda how he feels for him, but is rejected. What happens when the same exorcist who recently rejected him comes to his room later that day? This is my little series of Yullen oneshots. I love Yullen and finally started to write it.
D.Gray-Man - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,868 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 3/26/2010 - Published: 11/27/2008 - Kanda Yuu, Allen Walker