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Joined 11-23-08, id: 1749561, Profile Updated: 12-08-10
Author has written 15 stories for Neverwinter Nights, Alpha Centauri, Dragon Age, Mass Effect, and Diana Wynne Jones.

Updates and profile info now moved over to my blog (see homepage link). I'll also respond to non-FF member reviews over there, because I don't really like adding author-notes to my chapters, and have no other way of thanking non-account holders for their reviews/feedback. If you review but don't log in, you'll probably get a note of thanks on the blog after a short time.

Anonymous reviews are enabled. Non-constructive criticisms will simply be removed.

About my fanfics:

In Progress

• To Hell and Back: First-person perspective of HotU. There are no gnomes in this story. M for violence. Standard disclaimer. Let's face it, anybody who's played the game knows what's mine and what isn't.

• Life is a Circle: Pre-NWN2 OC, story of Esmerelle. Reading it, even in its unfinished form, will spoil aspects of Kail's Story for you. By the end of it you'll probably think "Oh my god, you're setting Kail up to become a complete munchkin powergamer". I already think that myself, but it gives me the impetus to torture her even further. Minimal gnomage. Rated M because it's going to get violent. And... weird. Disclaimer as above.

• A Single Step: The sequel to Kail's Story and Life is a Circle. Only the first chapter is uploaded so far, partially to tease you, partially to give me the impetus to keep writing once Life is a Circle is finished. You can read the first chapter without being spoiled in the slightest.

•The Call of Chiron: Based on Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri. Slow to update at the moment. Rated T, though that will change rapidly when the mindworms show up. Absolutely no gnomes. (insert disclaimer pointing at Brian Reynolds/Sid Meier/Firaxis)

• Origins: Dragon Age fic. One of the rare times I don't play (or write about) a human protagonist, and I'm having an enormous amount of fun with it. Story is gnome-free. Currently rated T, might have to change it to M. Most characters etc property of Bioware/EA etc.

• Companions: I had such super fun with the back-stories for the characters of Origins that I decided to do the same for the characters of NWN2, only more in-depth. Currently working on Bishop and Neeshka. Planning to do Sand and Ammon Jerro next. No plans at all for Grobnar and Zhjaeve. I am just not insane enough (yet) to write whole chapters about Grobnar, and I think everyone would get fed up of "Know that..." conversations on Zhjaeve's behalf. Rated M for swearing, violence, adult content, and the word 'whore', which is mentioned 39 times in the first 3 chapters.

• Deus Ex Machina: First part of what will eventually be a two-part story, spanning Mass Effect 1 and 2. Currently rated T, will be upgraded to M once all the killing starts. Gnome-free story. I'm not going to be following dialogue and side-quests as religiously as I do in some of my other fics. Standard Bioware/EA disclaimer.

• Adventures in Fantasyland: A collaboration between myself, Calanteli and LuckyShadows, based on Diana Wynne Jones' "A Tough Guide to Fantasyland". Even if you don't read this fanfic, I can highly recommend reading the book, which has chuckles aplenty. Rated T for light-hearted parody. There are no gnomes yet, but there probably will be later.


• Kail's Story: My first fanfic (NWN2 OC). An experiment in torturing a protagonist. A roller-coaster story of sex, drugs and gnomes. Well, just gnomes, really. No gnomes were harmed in the making of this story. Kail isn't a gnome, either. Rated M for violence and gnomes. Disclaimer: All characters except Kail, Valear and Lucas belong to Atari/Obsidian/Bioware etc. I got bored one day and threw some stats together. Click here if you want to see what I came up with.

• In a Nutshell: One-shot, a brief overview of the NWN OC from the POV of a half-elven thief. One of the few characters I haven't put through a trial by fire. Rated K+. Brief mention of gnomes.

• Faerûnian Times: A series of interviews with the main cast of Kail's story. Another parody, but also with some information and updates you might find interesting. Also introducing Alara Nimbletoes, Toril's first (and only) halfling reporter. T-rated for family fun.

• Deliverance: One-shot - What I would do if I got my own wicked way and was allowed to design my own ME3 party member, and a nod to H. G. Wells, one of my favourite authors, along with Verne, who pushed boundaries and helped paved the way for future sci-fi and fantasy authors. Rated T as not excessively violent. No gnomes.

• 12 Days of Christmas: A Faerûnian version of a popular Christmas song. Rated K.

• The Very Secret NWN2 Diaries: A collaboration between myself and some of the folks of the Bioware forums. The diaries are basically a parody of Cassandra Claire's Very Secret LOTR Diaries. Our parody was written several years ago, and I've finally gotten around to uploading it here. If you want to see the original, you'll have to trawl the old Legacy forums for it, because it was before Bioware's switch to Social forums. I might complete the rest of the companions' entries some day, but for now, it's complete.

To sum up: I try to stay true to the stories of the games. I have more freedom to play around with The Call of Chiron than the others because of the nature of the game genre (strategy/empire Vs RP). That said, there are times when I take massive liberties with Kail's story, and will also do so with Life is a Circle. You'll see what I mean later. I always try to return reviews when they are given. If you review, expect a long and rambling message of thanks. I like engaging with readers, which is, IMO, half of what being a writer is all about. All of the works below are ongoing, even if it seems I haven't updated them in a while. I accept criticism and typo/grammar corrections; sometimes I write/proof-read hurriedly during my lunch hours at work, so I don't always catch everything the first 5 times around.

The Turtle Moves.

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Scene Unseen by Eilam Wordsmith reviews
What is happening backstage, offscreen, behind the main action of the story? These are the scenes that we know MUST have happened.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 12,381 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 8/24/2015 - Published: 12/12/2009
I Sound My Indignant Snort Over the Script of the Game by Phthalo reviews
Shepard's plans to help the Consort with her problem don't go exactly as intended after a strange visitor decides to tag along on the mission.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,106 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/26/2013 - [J. Garson, Sha'ira] - Complete
Pride of Time by Anubis Ankh reviews
Hermione quite literally crashes her way back through time by roughly twenty years. There is no going back; the only way is to go forward. And when one unwittingly interferes with time, what one expects may not be what time finds...
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 50 - Words: 554,906 - Reviews: 2744 - Favs: 5,122 - Follows: 1,909 - Updated: 3/16/2012 - Published: 10/10/2011 - Hermione G., Severus S. - Complete
Burning by Hawki reviews
Poem: Burning...everything burned at the touch of the Reapers. And one of Earth's most major cities was no exception...
Mass Effect - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 209 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Published: 12/17/2010 - Complete
Renegade by College Fool reviews
Now a collection of oneshots. Various encounters and viewpoints offering a glimpse of a True Renegade, the Butcher of Torfan, a man defined as "a Good man, but remember that Good isn't Nice and Nice isn't Good." On temporary but indefinite hiatus.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 24,993 - Reviews: 119 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 6/30/2010 - Published: 2/14/2010 - J. Garson - Complete
Under a Violet Moon by Kaana Moonshadow reviews
Having accepted her fate as the Shardbearer, Keridwen Farlong can do nothing but refuse when one of her companions offers to lead her away from it all before the final battle begins... but we all know how well Bishop accepts a 'No', do we? AU NWN2
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 73,732 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 2/27/2010 - Published: 8/17/2009
Of all the strange things by Jinjer reviews
Suppose the pixels on your screen were sentient... suppose the characters of HotU were only playing along with your PC... Yes this is my sorry attempt at humor. Occasional cussing. COMPLETE
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,236 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/26/2009 - Published: 3/30/2009 - Complete
Neverwinter Nights 2: Shatterproof by Aren-Kae reviews
Ny'ren Vollen and Webb Mossfield must learn how to work together to bring an important artifact to Neverwinter... but with predjucies still high, it seems like it would take a miracle. Introducing a new group similar to NW Nine: the Nighthawks.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 30,275 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 1/3/2009 - Published: 11/25/2008
CPS by WitchWolf reviews
They are pale. They are shuddering. They’re out of character and out of their minds as well. They are the “romantic interests” and in bad need of an aspirin. And we provide. Welcome to the CPS – the Character Protection Society.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 20,044 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/25/2008 - Published: 11/4/2007
Of Mice and Men by fuxfell reviews
PostOC. Bishop takes on a simple job and finds there are... complications. If you are uncomfortable with kidnapping or hostage situations, better stay away.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 108,249 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 4/16/2008 - Published: 10/21/2007 - Complete
Fear and Loathing by anesor reviews
Short musings of the KC before the endgame at the Keep.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,663 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Published: 3/3/2008 - Ammon J., Qara - Complete
The Big Five Zero Zero by Sisanae reviews
Hundreds of candles, stalker dwarves and a mysterious visitor...just what IS going on at Crossroad Keep?
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,406 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/26/2007 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Life is a Circle reviews
Every story starts somewhere, and Kail's Story starts with her mother, Esmerelle. Life is a Circle tells the tale of Esmerelle's life. How she avoided the fate of the rest of the Bhaalspawn, how she arrived in Westharbor... and just who is Kail's father.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 34 - Words: 283,996 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 9/20/2015 - Published: 4/1/2009
Valentines Blues reviews
My submission for the Valentines Competition at Aria's Afterlife. The heart-wrenching tale of one writer's struggle to come up with an original romance idea.
Mass Effect - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,562 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Published: 2/14/2013 - J. Garson, Shepard - Complete
Deus Ex Machina reviews
Staff Lieutenant Eloise Shepard is pulled out of an Alliance engagement with the Batarians and given a promotion, along with a new post on humanity's newest war-ship. But when she meets a Spectre onboard, she begins to suspect that nothing is as it seems.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 33 - Words: 229,351 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 1/13/2013 - Published: 2/6/2010
Deliverance reviews
If I was given free rein to develop my own ME3 character, this is what I would do.
Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Mystery - Chapters: 2 - Words: 14,420 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 4/29/2012 - Published: 2/14/2010 - Complete
The Very Secret NWN2 Diaries reviews
Several years ago, myself and a couple of good folks collaborated on the Bioware forums on this piece of work. A parody of The Very Secret LOTR Diaries by Cassandra Claire. Credit given where due in the fic.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,814 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/9/2010
A Single Step reviews
When Kail steps into the King of Shadows' portal to escape the crumbling Vale, she takes her first step into the unknown.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,033 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/29/2010
Companions reviews
Just who are the companions of Knight-Captain Kail Farlong? Where were they born? What events shaped their pasts? And just how, exactly, did they end up helping a neurotic bard to save the Sword Coast from the legacy of Ancient Illefarn?
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: M - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 58,395 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 6/24/2010 - Published: 12/27/2009
Adventures in Fantasyland reviews
Fantasyland. A place of magic, war, lost heirs and dark lords. What happens when two young Tourists are thrust into the Fantasy Tour against their will? Co-written by Calanteli, LuckyShadows and Llandaryn.
Diana Wynne Jones - Rated: T - English - Parody/Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 18,055 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 6/7/2010 - Published: 5/25/2010
Kail's Story reviews
Kail Farlong is misunderstood bard. All she wants is the freedom to live her life as she pleases. But an attack on her home village shows that somebody else may have other plans for her. Sinister plans.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 108 - Words: 590,033 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 6/6/2010 - Published: 11/27/2008 - Complete
12 Days of Christmas reviews
A traditional Neverwinter Christmas song. What does every Knight-Captain want for Christmas?
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 373 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 1 - Published: 6/5/2010 - Complete
Faerûnian Times reviews
Halfling reporter Alara Nimbletoes gains exclusive interviews with the cast of Kail's Story. Includes latest updates, the official word on a sequel, and juicy gossip about the cast.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 12 - Words: 16,828 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 5/29/2010 - Published: 5/8/2010 - Complete
Origins reviews
When a new Blight threatens to overwhelm Thedas, a group of strangers must unite together to aid the last remaining Grey Wardens, and find themselves becoming unlikely heroes.
Dragon Age - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 11 - Words: 58,754 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 12/17/2009 - Published: 11/28/2009
The Call of Chiron reviews
Alexandria Mason is just 11 years old when the Unity explodes and her pod is sent crashing to Planet's surface. She struggles for survival on this harsh, unexplored new world.
Alpha Centauri - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,598 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/17/2009 - Published: 4/23/2009
In a Nutshell reviews
Observations of the world by Tally - thief extraordinaire.
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,117 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/29/2009 - Complete
To Hell and Back reviews
Sinisalo -- Sin, to her friends, and Boss, to her kobold companion -- has answered the call for a saviour, issued by the Lords of Waterdeep. But she never would have imagined where she would end up...
Neverwinter Nights - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 29,641 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 4/21/2009 - Published: 3/25/2009