SpunkInaMusca
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Joined 11-25-08, id: 1751751, Profile Updated: 04-03-09
Author has written 1 story for Twilight.

Feach ar seo, lads: PLEASE REVIEW!!


Once, they were ordinary girls, untainted by the harsh realities of mortality and secondary education.

Once, their stories were not tragic and plot-filled.

One, she was never Fallon.

One, she didn’t cry when glared at.

Once, they were every other Irish school-girl the world over.

Then, they became literate.

And all hope was abandoned.

Her name was "Carley". Her’s was Aoife. They were once two girls.

Until they were Wraithlike and BoucesLikeJaboc. Until they were fan-fiction writers.

Until they were SpunkInaMusca.

This is their story.

oOo

Signing in as : Wraithlike

‘Ello, poppets. This is Aoife, one third of the Stoner Hat Production Team, plotless, grammatically incorrect, and inherently sarcastic talking. Since Carley’s the only one with plot currently, it’s up to me to pull my weight somehow by writing a bio. So, here we are with ("Carley’s") fabulous fic. I promise to get on board soon … as soon as I have plot. He he.

Enjoy it, loves, ‘tis fabulous. And coming soon.

Signing off, perpetually plotless and misguiding maudlin,

Lovely lady Aoife, the Wraithlike bitch in the corner. Mwa. xxx

P.S. Spunk Ranson is a stoner. But we love him anyway.

xXx

Signing in as : BouncesLikeJaboc

Me Carley. Me write fanfic. -roars like Tarzan- ... -trails off as she realises this is completely mental- ... -clears throat-

Yes.

So.

Allow me to tell you a short story.

One day, myself and the crazy-ass-wraithlike-emo-supporting-semi-emo-herself child were sitting on the steps in the GPA, talking. One of us - never mind who, we are both separate and one in our thinking - suggested we write a fanfic together entitled 'Can Vampires Get Drunk?' As I was an inexperienced fanfiction writer and Aoife is the child from hell when it comes to things she's good at (Never forget clickclack, Aoife. Never.), I was slightly, um, terrified about what she might think. ('FULL OF MARY SUES!! ARRRGH!!' was my general 'wilde beaste-child-AKA-Aoife' thought.) But, alas, I wrote as Emmett, my favourite Cullen lad. Besides Eddie, that is. Anyway, I wrote and wrote and sent it to Aoife and hid under my bed as I waited for the response. And it was good. And we posted it. And now you've just been suckered into reading this ramble I have composed especially for you.

~Carley, the Biker Barbie skulking around listening to Linkin Park whilst puzzling through a huge identity crisis. xxxx

oOo

Signing in as : Wraithlike

I slaved over a hot Photobucket for too long NOT to put it up. Languish in the Jasper and Emmett Banner Fest, lads! Hope you enjoy ...

Aoife, The Acting Emo xxx

xXx

Signing in as : BouncesLikeJaboc

I found this one on Lizzie.Cullen's page. And I laaike, cause it's very very true:

Disclaimers are stupid. I'm obviously not Stephenie Meyer.

(Tnx Lizzie. I don't know you but I stole it anyway)


When life hands you lemons, throw them back and scream the way only true fangirls can 'GIVE ME THE CULLEN BOYS!!... AND JAKE AND EMBRY!!'

Edward Cullen: Bringing sexyback since 1918 (You have to agree, really Aoifz) (Hmmm ... looks sour)

Jasper Hale: taller, darker and handsome-er than you since... uh... (Help me out Aoife?? I DON'T KNOW!! screams) (Um ... sometime during the American Civil War? Any Americans out there, willing to help two poor foolish Irish girls??)

Jaboc Black is too sexy for his shirt. Or any shirt. Especially his own.

Emmett Cullen: Full of more tasteless innuendos than any irritable grizzly bear I've ever met.

Carley AKA BouncesLikeJaboc: The worst in the world at remembering dates and behaving normally since 2008

I think I'll stop now. xxx

But I have one to add:

Wraithlike: Local emo child and overtly depressed writer of fan fiction since 2008. And click-clack anihilator. Oh, sea.

oOo

Signing in as : Wraithlike

Iosa Chriost. Crimbo is over! And I'm running away to a warm country for a week, so I leave you with Carley. -sighs loudly- Don't get too excited, now.

Anyway, I bring you the newest "Jasper is really an emo child in denial" chapter. Sorry. I don't do cheerful vampires. Their lives suck too hard.

And a note to Carley's Mammy: IGNORE YOUR DAUGHTER!! REVIEW!! WE REALLY NEED THEM!!

And great party, by the way. You have a very nice Christmas tree. ;)

Signing off, as the soon to be absent,

Aoife, the captor of the castle. Yes, folks. It was me. ;) xxx


xXx

Signing in as : BouncesLikeJaboc

Dia duit! Woah, it's almost 2009.. and what better way to ring in the New Year than with Jazz dressed up as Captain Jack Sparrow?? If you haven't read Em's latest instalment you might want to. It's crazy-ass to the extreme. Note that Aoife is away globetrotting and hasn't approved it. Ah, well. I didn't approve her last chapter either. =)

I'd just like to mention at this point that I referred to Midnight Sun for the part with Edward in the car with the rest of the Cullens. Just so it made sense. It is after all, Twilight from Em and Jazz's PoV.

And Starla is a name I, uh, borrowed from Supernatural. She was a girl Dean met in a bar... (If you don't watch it, it really doesn't matter. It's just in case anyone was wondering.)

So, for now, I bid you slán. Oh, and if anyone is looking for a New Year's resoultion?? I've got one for yah: I resolve to REVIEW Can Vampires Get Drunk and recommend it to two other people...!!

Ciao for now!! (Ugh, cheesy rhyming..)

~ 'Carley' xxxxx =)


xXx

Signing in as : BouncesLikeJaboc:

Discoveries I have made: Irish is actually a crap language.

And what, you might ask, makes one say this? I'll tell you. Let me take you back about eight or so hours to Ms. K's Irish class. (It's always a party...) We began a poem entitled 'Clapsholas na Baile Mhor.' (Or something.) When asked what the 'clapsholas' bit meant, Ms.K replied: '''Twilight.' Clapsholas means Twilight, girls!''

Clapsholas = Twilight.

TWILIGHT?!

It's a crap word.

I hate it.

It made me sad.

-cries-

~ 'Carley' xx

oOo

Signing in as : Wraithlike

I think it's something in the water . . .

...In Carley's house. Seriously. I thought I was going to have to drag the child upright, and bounce around the place like the Emmett to her depressed Jasper for a while. Role-reversal, much?

She still has 'Clapsholas' written on her hand, you know. STILL. I think she may have rewritten it today, though ... Anyway. Slow social life, but what did I say already?

Let's just hope ShiverySox doesn't hear the Carlmiester blaspheming the Irish language. She might just kill her with a spoon.

Lord knows she's done it before. X.x

(STUDY SKILLS, ANYONE??)

Aoife xxx


xXx

Signing in as : BouncesLikeJaboc (the child who just spent two minutes trying to type 'signing' as she is rather blonde..)

Yes, Aoife is right. I re-wrote Clapsholas onto my hand to remind me to hate it. Hate the Irish language.

But now I have something else written on my hand to remind me to hate it (I have a short attention span and really crap memory. No, I don't, I just forget to hate things). And, no, Aoife, it's not you. You know I love you dearly, right?

No. It now says 'Lullaby.' as in, 'Bella's.' Because I wish to curse Carter Burwell and Robert Pattinson to hell and back because they have bloody big, stupid, abnormally large, MASSIVE hands that can play the bloody massive chords that are required to play 'Bella's Lullaby.' (I curse you both from here to Bamako and back again to spend your lives at the hands of the TwilightFreak. (i.e, me!))

Maybe Emmett can hate it too, and I'll somehow vent my anger that way... Anyway, emo-depressed-role-reversal is back to normal. I'm HAPPY again!

Anyway, just a note to say we're considering the pirate-thing for another fanfic as well. Or I am, and Aoife's gonna have no choice but to go along with it.

And also that I promise that there'll be no more bipolar Jazz. Sorry. To quote Bella 'You know your mood swings are giving me whiplash...' hhehehehehe!

Tarrah!

~ Carley xxxx

oOo

Signing in as : Wraithlike

Sweet God almighty, that was hard. Ever feel like there are physically not enough hours in the day to accomplish everything that needs doing in your life? Sure you have. But usually, you don't feel it so much until you're thirty, balancing marriage, kids and a mortgage, and less when you're mid-teen and approaching state examinations. x.X

You know, I'm currently typing with my eyes closed to conseve energy. No lie. I wrote my whole chapter today, which I never do, simply because I have no more time. Damn you, Irish education system. Damn you.

So. Enjoy. Review, please. They make us happy. And when I'm not happy, neither is Jasper.

Do you really want to go through that again?

Aoife xxx

xXx

Signing in as: BouncesLikeJaboc:

Dia duit, mo chairde! I have only one thing to say: shimmy shimmy can-can MOSH!

On account of my legendary blondness, I couldn't remember what I was actually trying to say when moshing came around. I didn't realise till like two days later that it was KRUMPING. yes, KRUMPING. But mosh goes better, really... Up next is a very special, very very VERY funny chapter courtesy of Aoife... You'll all like I promise! And to all those who scorn me for scorning the Irish language: I can chuck spoons at people too, just you wait!

Ciao! ...

Or should I say gracias?? xxxx

xXx

Signing in as: BouncesLikeJaboc

Haaiiii!!

It's been too long, my dears. However, I am back! Back with stories that could make your hair curl... if it isn't curly already, that is... Yes, stories about: (-cue dramatic music-) The Junior Cert Mocks! (-screams-).

No, actually, they're not all that bad. Just unecessarily stressful, I guess. Ugh. Anyway, I think the new chapter is slightly more... erratic than usual. You'll see if you haven't read it already. Read and review.

Anywaayy... Horatio Caine ROCKS. Which is why he got a mention. Paramore also rocks, come to mention them. Which I just did. You agree, don't you Aoife? (You hypocrite?!) hahaha! I know you do!

Well, only one week of mocks left then we have plenty of time to write fanfics... And maybe time to write an extra-special joint-effort chapter... aren't you excited??

Baaii!

~ Carley, AKA the not-quite-blonde Emo. (It's the music I listen to, okay?!) =)

Reviewing makes the heart grow fonder, and the updates faster... (Copyright Twilight96!)

Stupid test:

18 or lower means you’re not stupid.

x Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking.
x Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking.
You have ran into a glass/screen door.
x You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
x You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.

You have ran into a tree.
It IS possible to lick your elbow
You just tried to lick your elbow.
x You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm.
x You just tried to sing them.
x You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
x You have choked on your own spit.
You have seen the the Matrix and still don’t get it.
x You didn’t notice that in the last question “the” was spelled twice
x You just looked at it.
xYour hair is blonde/dirty blonde.
People have called you slow.

x You have accidentally caught something on fire
x You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes/cheek.
x You have caught yourself drooling.
x You’ve fallen asleep in class
If someone says “fart” you laugh.
You just laughed.

x Sometimes you just stop thinking
x You tell a story and forget what you were talking about
People are often shaking their heads and walking away from you
You are often told to use your “inside voice”.
x You use your fingers to do simple math.

You have eaten a bug.
x You are taking this test when you should be doing something important
x You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it
x You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket

You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t even when you know it won’t happen to you.
x You break a lot of things.
Your friends know not to use big words around you
x You sometimes tilt your head when you’re confused
x You have fallen out of your chair before
x When you’re laying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling

I couldn't resist. And I, Carley, profess to scoring 27 on the above test... 27... (Your turn, Aoife! ahahahahaha!)

(Copyright MayCullen!)

Signing in as: Wraithlike

Hey, folks! Well, like the lovely Carley, I too am slogging through the Junior Cert Mocks (AND THEY'RE HORRIBLE!! SO HORRIBLE, I MAY NEED TO USE COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF HYPERBOLE TO MAKE YOU UNDERSTAND THEIR HORROR!!)

But, yeah. I wrote about a random bard-girl and how she feels her life is a total waste of time for my English exam ... but it was sort of pretty ... in a weird, you know, suicidal Jasper way. Oh, well.

Anyway. I'm up next for the new chappie ... and I have a few ideas, but I won't give them away now! And don't hold your breath waiting. I think my Jazz-muses are only going to show up full-force after the Mocks.

But, anywho ... Courtne - "Carley" challenged me, so ... without further ado ...Carley's (that's sooo not her name) Mammy wants to know who this Courtney dude is?? xx

18 or lower means you’re not stupid.

Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking.
Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking.
xYou have ran into a glass/screen door.
x You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
x You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.

x You have ran into a tree.
It IS possible to lick your elbow
You just tried to lick your elbow.
You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm.
You just tried to sing them.
x You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
x You have choked on your own spit.
You have seen the the Matrix and still don’t get it.
x You didn’t notice that in the last question “the” was spelled twice
x You just looked at it.
Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde.
People have called you slow.

x You have accidentally caught something on fire
x You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes/cheek.
x You have caught yourself drooling.
You’ve fallen asleep in class
If someone says “fart” you laugh.
You just laughed.

Sometimes you just stop thinking
x You tell a story and forget what you were talking about
People are often shaking their heads and walking away from you
You are often told to use your “inside voice”.
x You use your fingers to do simple math.

You have eaten a bug.
x You are taking this test when you should be doing something important
x You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it
x You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket

You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t even when you know it won’t happen to you.
x You break a lot of things.
Your friends know not to use big words around you
x You sometimes tilt your head when you’re confused
x You have fallen out of your chair before
x When you’re laying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling

Okay, so I, Aoife, now in turn profess to scoring ... 20. Okay ... that's not so bad ... but I think they're confusing "stupid" with "clumsy" or "touched".

Both of which, I am. BUT!! I have a present for you guys. In honour of ten chapters and fifty reviews. Well, actually more than ten chapters, but I made it for the ten-chapter thing. Hope you all enjoy it! Click here for the wonderful Aoife genius!!

Wraithlike out!...I expect you'll be getting all 'A's in the Mocks so Aoife seeing as you have such time on your hands as to produce this wonderful piece of cinematography...Carley's (that's sooo not her name) Mammy! x

Signing in as: Wraithlike

Sooo. Yeah. Hope you all like the vid, and thank you Carley's Mammy for your kind words of praise ... Well, me and the Carlifier both wrote the same amount of utter crap on our English exams, so hopefully, I can pass ... anywho. I'm tired. Meh. Everyone, you'd better review, or I'll freaking break your face. ;)

I'm so peppy. I should have my own T.V. show. AND I WANNA WATCH TUCK EVERLASTING! While playing some Disney trivia game, they played a clip of it, in which the guy was like, 'I'm one hundred and four ... I'll never grow older ... I'll be seventeen forever ...' and me and Carley actually screamed.

Out loud.

xxx FANGIRLS FOREVER!

xXx

Signing in as (And YEEEEHAAW! I spelled 'sign' right for the first time in weeks!): BouncesLikeJaboc:

Lads, (And ladies) We! are! Para- No, wait, wrong shout out. (You'll get it if you have The Final Riot!... if not... ah, well...) Neither of us belong to Paramore, nor are affilates in any way, shape, or form. Sorry. I love them though, if that counts, and loveloveLOVE Josh Farro and wish to be in possession of the artistic left side of his brain that allows him to play guitar... (Sounds creepy, but when you FAIL miserably at playing Misery Business for two months on guitar, you start to get desperate... Maybe I'll just tackle-glomp him instead in a fit of fangirlism as I fester in my own jealous puddle of, um, jealousy...)

Oh, woah, waaaayyyy off the point there... 'That's what you get when you'... suffer from sleep deprivation! (Due to a 'Moonlight' marathon on Tuesday night (FYI I have 3, thats right THREE episodes left that I'm off to watch now... then bye bye Mick St. John... -sighs-) that I haven't recovered from... Staying up till 1.10am and getting up at 7.00am is a BAD bad idea... I love Alex O' Loughlin, though... hehehehe...then going to a Coronas concert then tackle-glomping/shouting at Dave coz he tried to walk away before he signed my poster and NOT GETTING A PICTURE WITH DANNY COZ PAULA (or Sive) TOLD US SHE WAS LEAVING AND SHE WAS HOLDING MY CAMERA!! I Love you, though, whoever said 'Hang on, I have to go now!'... )

As I was saying (if you're all still reading my crazy ramblings) We! Are! (Not Paramore) SPUNKINAMUSCA/ALIVEEE!! Never fear Carley and Aoife are here! (Theoretically speaking, it's just Carley speaking both in the third person and speaking on Aoife's behalf coz she's at home three minutes away presumably reading/listening/watching something she swore she wouldn't watch coz she's an absolute hypocrite... (I love you, though, and I'm being very insulting in this post... sorrryy! Mwah!) and will presumably tell me tomorrow/send me an email letting me know she'd done one of the presumable things I presumed she'd do. Hypothetically speaking, of course.)

Oh, okay, here's my ACTUAL point:

Aoife wrote you guys a new chapter so you'd know we're still alive and that we still love you all and hopefully will get the joint chapter done sometime in the next two weeks...

There. I said it. Point made, period.

I'm tired and half-blinded by the horrible glare coming from my computer... owww... and my arms are tired so the words aren't typing... I might as well type eyes-closed... lets try it...

bye gusa I locew tou love carlety.

Hey, not bad! What I actually meant was 'bye guys I love you love Carley!'... close enough!!

I'll shut up now.

Baii! Fangirl-Forever (AKA BouncesLikeJaboc...(Can I just say AOIFE READ MY 90210 FIC! (ALL TOGETHER NOW: LE GASP!))

xxxCarleyxxx

PS: I hope you appreciate my essay. This is what happens when I need to write stuff... by 'stuff' I mean my second (And possibly third) book... I'm really leaving this time... xxx

Can Vampires Get Drunk? reviews
Em and Jazz are about to find out. Eternity is starting to look a lot more attractive through the rosy glow of alcohol, so get ready for insanity, jazz hands, Rocky Balboa and our two favourite vamps. A look at Twilight while ridiculously hung-over.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 14 - Words: 20,772 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 4/2/2009 - Published: 12/1/2008 - Emmett, Jasper