Author has written 4 stories for Twilight.
age: none of your friggin' bizness-teenager
apperance: medium length blone hair with black stripes, wide blue/grey eyes and pale!!
Favorite books/movies: Twilight Saga, The house of night series, and any other vamp. thing oh i almost forgot THE MAXIMUM RIDE series!!
Favorite bands: Flyleaf, Paramore,kings of leon,All time low,The Devil Wears Prada,I see Stars, VersaEmerge, My chemical Romance, Red Jumpsuit Apparatus,Metrostation,My American Heart, panic at the disco, fall out boy, likin park, evenescence, Nevershounever, cute is what we aim for, rise against, green day...
Favorite couples: Edward and Bella, Alice and Jasper, Emmett and Rosalie, Carlisle and Esme,Jacob and Renesme, Max and Fang, Erik and Zoey, Alex and Mat, Ella and Iggy!!
current fav.Poppin' Chamange by All Time Low
Did you know...
kissing is healthy.
bananas are good for period pain.
it's good to cry.
chicken soup actually makes you feel better.
94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.
lying is actually unhealthy.
you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.
it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.
89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.
it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.
chocolate will make you feel better.
most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.
a good friend never judges.
a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.
boys aren't worth your tears.
we all love surprises.
Now... make a wish.
Wish REALLY hard!!
WISH WISH WISH WISH
Your wish has just been recieved.
Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...
Your wish will be granted.
Loves to joke
...MY SECRET DON'T READ
1 I need to tell you a secret LO0K AT 5
-- TEN COMANDMENTS OF A TEEN:
(why wait that long)
Hey you! I know you're just dying to do this!!
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow?
3. Your first initial?
4. Your month of birth?
5. Which color do you like more, black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
7. Your favorite number?
8. Do you like California or Florida more?
9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).
Are you done?
If so, scroll down
1. You are completely in love with this person.
2. If you choose:
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are
3. If you’re initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you
Fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but
The memories will last forever.
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life
Changing experience for the good.
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your
5. If you choose...
Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time
But will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do
Anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.
8. If you choose...
9. If you choose...
10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!
98 percent of teens can walk without running into walls. If you're in the 2 percent that can't, post this in your profile.
If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If random songs just pop into your head at any given moment, from 'I've Been Working On the Railroad' to the Animorphs' version of the Barney Song (I hate you, you hate me, we're an alien family...), to your most favorite song ever, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever walked into a window copy this onto your profile (you don't wanna hear that story)
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in your profile.
If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've met your not-blood related twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile. (dude, it was weird)
If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.
If Faxness is one of your obsessions, post this in your profile.
If you find yourself making fanfictions of other fanfictions in your head, post this in your profile.
If you think Max and Fang should just get over themselves and get together already, copy and paste this into your profile. (YES YES YES!!)
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.
if you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile.
If you have ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this into your profile (what's two squared?)
If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.
Copy this and paste it on your profile if you think sarcasm is a conditioned reflex.
If you are called 'weird' at least 5 times a day, post this in your profile.
If you think that the kids should let Lucky have some stupid Lucky Charms, post this in your profile.
If you think the Cocoa puffs bird should go to rehab, post this in your profile.
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like, two reviews, copy this into your profile.
"Treat me like an angel and I'll be your lil' devil."
Crazy is a relative term in my family!
"Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."( i love this saying:)(brought to you by goodquotes.com)
"Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."
Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
Best friends are the people that know all about and still put up with you!
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Borrow money from pessimists - they don't expect it back.
Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film!
42.7 of all statistics are made up on the spot.
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
I intend to live forever -- so far, so good.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
The only reason I am always listening to music is to drownd out the sound of your voice!~
Drive carefully, 90 of people are accidents.
"Careful with that light at the end of the tunnel, it might be another train coming."
"don't drink and drive you might spill your beer"
If you can't fix it with duck tape you have'nt used enough
Love is like a rose in winter, only the strong survive
Smile, and the world will smile with you. Laugh and they'll all think your on drugs.
"Where there's a will, there's a way. And where there's a way, then there's usually a stop sign somewhere along the road."
I'm scared to fall in love, scared to fall fast, because everytime i fall in love...it never seems to last
Silence is silver, but music is gold...
loved by some, hated by many, envied by most, yet wanted by plenty!
"I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on ebay."
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.
normal people worry me
you say physco like it's a bad thing
None of us are virgins, life has screwed us all
"my tears for you are like dark chocolate- bitter sweet and probably no good for me."
everyone in life has a purpose, even if its to serve as a BAD EXAMPLE
Anger is one letter short of danger.
If you love somebody, they shouldn't make you cry, they should be worth crying over.
Lots of things change...lots of them don't...but the fact that I love you...that will always stay the same.
"I'm going to live life or die trying"
"If you die, I'll kill you!"
The only reason that I talk to myself is because that I'm the only one whose answers I accept
Learn from the mistakes of others, because you can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
Trust your instincts and listen to your friends, because they may be right when you don't want them to be "Birdie, birdie, in the sky, why'd you do that in my eye? Looks like sugar, tastes like sap. OMG! IT'S BIRDIE CRAP!"
"Birdie, birdie, in the sky, why'd you do that in my eye? Looks like sugar, tastes like sap. OMG! IT'S BIRDIE CRAP!"
They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?.
Love is like heaven but hurts like hell. " Look up for inspiration, down for concentration but don’t look side to side for information". You tried, and you failed, so the lesson is, never try. - Homer J. Simpson. "Is tuna really Chicken?" - Jessica Simpson, after reading "Tuna, Chicken of the sea" "Dying is just natures way of saying 'Hey! Your not alive anymore!'"
" Look up for inspiration, down for concentration but don’t look side to side for information".
You tried, and you failed, so the lesson is, never try. - Homer J. Simpson.
"Is tuna really Chicken?" - Jessica Simpson, after reading "Tuna, Chicken of the sea"
"Dying is just natures way of saying 'Hey! Your not alive anymore!'"
"The whole world is going to hell and I'm driving the bus"(Hellz to the ya! "I tried sniffing coke once, but the ice cubes stuck in my nose" "Don't criticize my mess unless you'd like to become part of it." "I have a mind like a steel trap; it is rusty and illegal in 47 states" I'm an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight
"I tried sniffing coke once, but the ice cubes stuck in my nose"
"Don't criticize my mess unless you'd like to become part of it."
"I have a mind like a steel trap; it is rusty and illegal in 47 states"
I'm an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight
"Behind every good man there is a good woman and behind that another man looking at her ass"
I love him, O yes I do,
"God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls could flirt!"
It takes 42 muscels to smile, so instead pick up your middle finger and
Every morning is the dawn of a new error
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
I can see clearly now, the brain is gone...
OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO
A repair shop:
Some copy/paste things!!
You Say Jonas Brothers
Try Not To Cry:
mommy...johnny brought a gun to school he told his friends that it was cool and when he pulled the trigger back, it shot with a great, huge crack.
mommy i was a good girl i did what i was told, i went to school, i got straight A's i even got the gold!
when i went to school that day, i never said good bye.
i'm sorry that i had to go, but mommy please dont cry, when johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another.
And all because johnny got the gun from his brother.
mommy, please daddy: that i love him very much, And please tell Zack my boyfriend that it wasnt just a crush.
And tell my little sister; that she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; i'll be waiting for her now.
And tell my wonderful friends; that they're always the best.
mommy; i'm not the first, i'm not better than the rest.
mommy tell my teachers; i wont show up for class, And never forget this, And please dont let this pass.
mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one though deserves this.
but mommy it's not fair i left without a kiss.
And mommy tell the doctors i know they really did try. i think i even saw one doctors trying not to cry.
mommy i'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest, But mommy please remember i'm in heaven with the rest.
when i heard that great big crack i ran as fast as i could, please listen to me if you would.
i wanted to go to collage, i wanted to try things that were new.
i guess i'm not going with daddy, on that trip to the new zoo.
i wanted to get married i wanted to have kids.
i wanted to be an actress, i really wanted to live.
But mommy i must go now, the time is getting late.
mommy, tell my Zack, i'm sorry to cancel the date.
I love you mommy i always have, i know you know it's true.
And mommy all i need to say is "mommy i love you"
that always makes me sad...
in memory of the cloumbine & virginia tech students who were lost:
please if you would,
dont smash this on the ground.
if you pass this on,
maybe people will cry,
just keep this in your heart,
for the people who didnt get to say 'goodbye'
now you have two choices,
1) pass this on and show people you care, repost as 'try not to cry'
2) dont send it and you have just proven how cold-hearted you really are...
Life's a bitch, if it were a hoe it would be easy(LOL)
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.
95 percent of all kids make fun of and laugh at other kids because you're different. If you're that 5 percent who laugh at that 95 percent because they're all the same, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa, copy and paste this into your profile.
I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!
If you have your own little world copy this into your profile
If you think being unique is better than being cool, you know the drill.
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, post this.
if there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile
There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...
If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile
-If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
-Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
-If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile(so many times!!)
-If you've ever known you were in mortal danger but decided to go through with the stunt anyway, copy this into your profile
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose—me or your life?
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and boy runs after and says..
The reason you don't cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason why I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
AWWWW Post on your profile if you love to love.
95 percent of teenagers care about popularity. If you like pretzels, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever burst into song for no reason Copy and paste this to your profile
If you truly believe that there is an Edward Cullen out there somewhere for you (his name doesn't have to be Edward)...copy/paste this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen out of a chair backwards...copy/paste this into your profile.
If, for no reason, you have laughed at a part in a movie that really wasn't funny...copy/paste this into your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive seconds...copy/paste this into profile.
If you have ever run into a mirror...copy/paste this into your profile.
If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell & hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile.
Put this in your profile if you didn't know the ABC's song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune...
If you are crazy and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile.
If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.(that would be me:)
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"
If you are in lala land most of the time copy this into your profile.
If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/someone else, copy this into your profile.
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think the semi-colon is completely useless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your profile!
92 percent of American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.
If you have ever not known where you were when there was a sign right next to you, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever walked into the men's toilets instead of the ladies or vice versa, paste this onto your profile.(don't ask)
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.
If at least once a week, someone misspells or mispronounces your last name...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you and your friends have nicknames, titles, or anything else for each other copy this to your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.(frequently)
If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are totally confused right now copy this onto your profile.
98 percent of teenagers do drugs and alcohol. If you like bagels, copy this into your profile.
People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door
If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile
When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
We fall for stupid boys we make lots of dumb mistakes we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenager grls, we're really good at one thing, staying strong.
I only have PMS on days that end in the letter "y".
You're just jealous because the voices in my head talk to me and not you.
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
All the good ones are either gay, married, vampires or fictional characters in books or movies.
When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back!
My night in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminium foil.
Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.
Before you criticize some one, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away and you still have their shoes.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.
Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepare to shatter.
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers
I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either.
If you think iPods were gifts from the gods copy and paste this onto your profile(especially when you have very thin walls)
For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you call everyone in the phone book that has the last name Cullen. Crazy is when you honestly belive Edward exists.Crazy is when someone walks into the room and you run and duck for cover before finding out thet it was your dad. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!
You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, I get a paddle boat and save your stupid ass.
I called your boyfriend gay, and he hit me with his purse.
Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916
Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843
Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901
Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916
Edward Cullen: Sexier, hotter and spicier Than You since 1901
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up
You know what makes letting go of a crush so hard? The fear that the moment you let go, they'll catch on.
It's true, Edward Cullen prefers brunettes. Sorry, Barbie you aren't Bella, and Edward isn't your Ken.
Jacob Black glared at the children dressed as vampires and he knew it wasn't right but he lied and told them there was no candy left anyway.(gasp! that monster!)
On a package of peanuts: open package, eat nuts. (What were you supposed to do? Throw them at the people sitting near you?)
On a child's Superman costume: Warning: Wearing this garment does not enable you to fly. (I blame the parents for that one)
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
I live in my own little world- but it's ok, they know me there.
The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you
I was walking around in a store. I saw a cashier hand this little boy his money back saying
1) Repost this message.
Boy: baby we need to talk
Girl: kyle, what do u mean?
Boy: sumthin has come up...
Girl: wat? Wuts wrong? Is it bad?
Boy: i dont want to hurt u baby
Girl: -thinks- omg i hope he doesnt break up with me... I love him so much
Boy: baby are you there??
Girl: yea im here wut is so important??
Boy: im not sure if i should say
Girl: well u already brought it up, so please just tell me.
Boy: im leaving...
Girl: baby wut are u talking about?? I dont want u to leave me, i love you
Boy: not like that, i mean im moving far away
Girl: why? All of ur famliy lives over here.
Boy: well my father is sending me away to a boarding skool far away.
Girl: i cant believe this.
FATHER: (picks up tha other fone, interrupts & yells furiously) ERiKA, wat did i tell you about talking to boys?!...Get off the damn fone!! (And hangs up)
Boy: wow ur father sounds really mad
Girl: u know how he gets, but anywayz i dont want you to go
Boy: would you run away with me?
Girl: baby, u know i would, i would do anything for u, but i cant... U dont know wut would happen if i did. My dad would kill me !!
Boy: (sad) its ok i understand i guess..
Girl: (thinking) i cant believe wuts going on
Boy: i need to give u sumthing 2nite b/c i am leaving on flight 1-80 in tha morning, so i need to see you now.
Girl: ok i will sneak out & meet u at tha park
Boy: ok ill meet u there in 20min
They meet at a nearby park, they both hug eachother. And he gives her a note.
Boy: here u go, this is for you i gotta go.
Girl: tear (begins to cry)
Boy: baby dont cry, u know i love you...but i have 2 go
Girl: ok (begins to walk away)
They both go back home. And erika begins to read tha letter he gave her
U probably already know that im leaving, i knew this would be better if i wrote a letter explaining tha truth about how much i care about you. The truth is, is that i never loved you, i hated you so much, u are my bitch and dont u ever forget that. I never cared about you, and never wanted to talk to you, n be around u. U really have no clue how much i hate you. Now that im leaving i thought u should know that i hate you bitch, u never did tha right thing, and u were never there. I didnt think i could hate someone as much as i hate you. And i never want to see you, for the rest of my life, i will never miss kissing you like before, i never want to cuddle up, how we used to. I will not miss you and thats a promise. U never had my love, and i want you to remember that. Bitch u keep this letter bcuz this may be tha last thing u have from me. I hate you so much. i will not talk to you soon bitch... Goodbye
erika begins to cry, she throws tha paper in tha garbage & crys for hours
...A day passes, she is sad, depressed and she feels so lonely... Then she gets a fone call...
Friend: how are u feeling?
Girl: i just cant believe this happend i thought he loved me.
Friend: o, about that. Kyle left me a msg. A few days ago. He told me to tell u to look in ur jacket pocket or something...
Girl: ummm ok
She finds a piece of paper in tha jacket, It says...
Baby i hope u find this before u read my letter. I knew ur dad might read it, so i switched a few words...
Hate = Love
Never = Alwayz
Bitch = Baby
Will not= will
... I hope u didnt take that seriously because i love you with all my heart, and it was so hard to let you go thats y i wanted u to run away with me...
Girl: omg its a letter, Kyle does love me!!, he must of slipped it into my pocket when he hugged me. I cant believe how stupid I am!!
Friend: lol ok but i g2g... Call me later
Girl: -happy- ok bye, i'll be at home waiting for my baby to call me !!
... Erika turns tha T.V. on...
Breaking news 'An airplane has crashed. Over 47 young boys died, we are still searching for Survivors...This is a tragedy we will never forget, this plane was flight 1-80...it was on its way to an all boys boarding school...' Reporter says.
she turns off the tv...3 days later, she kills herself, because of tha fact that Kyle was dead & she had nothing to Live for...
...A day after that the fone rings. Nobody answers. It was Kyle, he called to leave a msg. 'Its Kyle, i guess ur not home so, I called 2 let u know that im alive, i missed my flight b/c i had 2 see u one last time. So i hope ur not worried. I am staying for good. Sorry if u got scared, i promise 2 make it up 2 u everything will be a be ok i love you so much...call me asap bye!
If you like this story, and think it has a point or anything along those lines, PLEASE just simply Copy & Paste... It's not that hard... anyways...hope you enjoyed. :( :) ??
Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile
I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again
Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought
"Wal-Mart, do they like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton
It's funny until someone gets hurt, then it's hilarious!
It's funny until someone gets hurt, then it's hilarious!
Smile first thing in the morning. Get it over with.
Don't worry about the world coming to an end today; it's already tomorrow in Australia.
Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them more.
Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.
Suicide is Man's way of telling God, 'You can't fire me, I quit.'
A day without sunshine is...night.
When life hands you a lemon, squirt life in the eye and run like hell.
when life hands you lemmons transform its DNA to make it a supper lemon!( thanx for this Kala!)
My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run away. He hates that.
DO NOT HIT KIDS!! No, seriously. They have guns now.
Of course I'm talking to myself. Who else can I trust?
Ho-lla-back girl: I have no idea what it means, but apparently, Gwen Stefani isn't one and it has something to do with bananas.
You think you're all that and a bag of chips. Well I'm all that and a bag of skittles. So taste my rainbow, bitch.
Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.
There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't count.
A friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"
If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile
Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn
Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.-charlie and the chaocolate factory!
If you don't like me, there is nothing I can do. Here's a newsflash Honey, I don't live to please you
I’m a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude
25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
19. My mother taught me ESP.
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
'Never Argue With A Woman'
One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after
Although not familiar
She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to
Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat.
He pulls up alongside the
What are you doing?'
'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?').
'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her.
'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.
'Yes, but I see you have all the equipment.
'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says the woman.
'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.
'That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.
'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.
MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.
It's likely she can also think
9 Things I Hate About Everyone:
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where the heck is yours? Do I point at my butt when I ask where the toilet is?
2 People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.
3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". damn straight! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the heck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their butts!
5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor.
6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.
8 When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?
9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumb ass?
Guys with Emo hair are like a BILLION times more sexy than other guys.
'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!
Silence is golden; Duct tape is SILVER
If you put the words "In bed" after every sentence, life will be A LOT funnier. In Bed.
You friggin gave Billy a HEART ATTACK-In Bed.
Get Closer To Nature In Bed.
He's WAY better than I am...In Bed.
You did WHAT?...In Bed.
You know what Mommy
You went to the doctor today.
I can hear that doctor again.
Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.
98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels.
Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile. (Or geek.)
I do not do drugs. I do sugar. If you're someone who does sugar, copy this into your profile.
If you ever wondered who made up all of the 'copy this into your profile' things then copy this into your profile.
If you have ever burned any sort of food in the microwave, oven, toaster, or on the stove, copy this into your profile.
No boy is worth crying for, and the one that is won't make you cry. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.
I like eggs. Tigers are pretty. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.
A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend already has a shovel ready to bury the loser who made you cry.
A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.
A good friend will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. A best friend will throw you a tampon and push you in.
A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies.
A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried...just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore.
If you walk and trip or stumble because your too busy reading a book copy and paste this into your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile
Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile.
If you think that dumb girl from the Eggo commercial should just give her father some freakin' waffles already, copy and paste this into your profile.
A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know ands wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.(every damn day!!)
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile.
If you don't have a problem with homosexuals, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!
If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!
If you don't do drugs (They are nasty), copy/paste this into your profile
"It takes 42 muscles to frown,28 muscles to smile,but only 4 muscles to reach out and slap someone."
"Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that."
"When life gives you lemons,make apple juice,then laugh while people try to figure out what the hell you did."
"When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the people you hate."
"It doesnt matter whether the glass is half empty or half full,just drink it and get it over with."
"I'm not afraid of Death.What's he gonna do,kill me?"
Chocolate chip cookies are yummy! If you agree, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever had a constant enemy, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever done anything incredibly stupid for no apparent reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.
With any luck, by next year - I'll be going out with one of these girls - (shows pictures of beautiful models) - But for now, let me say - Without hope or agenda - Just because it's Christmas - And at Christmas you tell the truth - To me, you are perfect - And my wasted heart will love you - Until you look like this - (shows picture of a mummy) - Merry Christmas.
Don't you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You wouldn't marry a girl just because she's pretty, but my goodness, doesn't it help?
I don't care what you think as long as it's about me. The best of us can find happiness in misery.
I'm tough, I'm independent, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch - okay!
The heart may freeze or it can burn
I believe in karma . . . it's a bigger bitch than I choose to be.
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well-preserved body, but rather to skid sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy shit, what a ride!"
Avoid hangovers. Stay drunk.
People will always talk about you. Might as well give them SOMETHING to talk about.
My dad says I can only date when monkeys fly out of his butt. Sad, isn't it?
Save water. Drink vodka.
You know you're awesome when people you don't even know hate you.
Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.
Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy that kisses your forhead,
who keeps your picture in his wallet,
who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,
who holds your hand in front of all his freinds,
who thinks your beautiful without makeup,
one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,
THE one who turns to his friends and says THATS HER!
THE IF’S SAY IT ALL!!
This is Bunny. Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination.If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever been pushed into an ice-cold pool copy and paste this into your profile
If you run into inanimate objects...and then blame them for it copy and paste this in your profile.
Did you just call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement.
Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.
You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.
Life was so simple when boys had cooties
I ran with scissors, and lived!
(Guys should REALLY read this!!)What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:
When she walks away from you mad, follow her
When she stare's at your mouth, Kiss her
When she pushes you or hit's you, Grab her and dont let go
When she start's cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong
When she ignore's you, Give her your attention
When she pull's away, Pull her back
When you see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word
When you see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared, Protect her
When she lay's her head on your shoulder, Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steal's your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she tease's you, Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesnt answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay
When she look's at you with doubt, Back yourself up
When she say's that she like's you, she really does more than you could understand
When she grab's at your hands, Hold her's and play with her fingers
When she bump's into you, bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tell's you a secret, keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does
When she misses you, she's hurting inside
When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away
When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers
When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it
Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
Tease her and let her tease you back
Stay up all night with her when she's sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
Give her the world
Let her wear your clothes
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
Let her know she's important
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Guys post as: "i'd be this boyfriend."
15 Things to do when you’re in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "We have a Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
15.Grap alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go"
If you can read this message, you are blessed beacause over two million people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blviee taht I cloud aulactly
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanig. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in wht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be tatol
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wohle.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling
was ipomorantt! Tahts so cool!
If you could read that put it in your profile!
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"
I am a girl.
Pain is enevitable; suffering is optional
Growing old is manditory; growing up is optional
Looking for the perfect girl? Go buy yourself a barbie.
Dream as if you'll live forever; live as if its your last day
Best friends, its who we are . . . instead of saying "exuse me" we push each other out of the way and say "move". We hug each other and laugh at any random moment. We argue about the stupidest things then we find out we were both wrong
You know you live in 2008 when . . .
1.) You accidently enter your password on a microwave
2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of getting up and just pushing the button on the TV
6.) Your boss doesn't even know that you have the abilty to do your job
7.) As you keep reading this list you keep nodding and smiling
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all of your friends
9.) You were to busy to notice #5 and #3
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5 and 3
11.) Now your laughing at your stupidity
12.) Now your thinking "I have to put this in my profile!"
13.) You put this in your profile because you fell for it and you know you did
I’ll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter.
The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.
So what if we act like immature idiots? We’re having fun..!
He said I love you, I sneezed and said sorry I’m allergic to bullshit.
Excuse me... have you seen my sanity... I think I lost it.
Why is Donkey Kong called “DONKEY” Kong if he’s a monkey?
If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it’s gone.
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re free to go.
Life isn’t passing me by, it’s trying to run me over.
Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?
This is Bob. Bob likes sharp things. I suggest you run from Bob.
I’m sick of following my dreams, I’m just gonna ask where they're going and hook up with them later.
Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in you face?
I’m the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
I’m so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.
Heaven doesn’t want me, and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over.
“He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.”
“I’m the kind of person your parents warned you about.”
“When you’re down I may not be able to pick you back up but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you”
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
If you have ever ran into an inantimate object and apologized, copy and paste this to your profile
Funny how just when you think life cant possibly get any worse it suddenly does. ya funny ha.ha.
If you don’t stand for anything, you don’t stand for anything!--George W. Bush (lmao) LOL!!
When There's a will, I wanna be in it TEE HEE!!
Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!
What's another word for thesaurus? HMM i wonder how we could find that out!
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. HAHa
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it? hmmm, lets try it!!
Help I've fallen and i cant...hey nice carpet! its soo pretty! lol
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it? seriously!
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand. TRU DAT!
Your kid may be an honor student but YOU’RE still an IDIOT! ahahaha!!
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.
The soptaneous rally will began at 1:45 HAHAHAHAHA!!
If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? YES! (evil grin)
Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? WAIT, if u try..and fail...SCREW THAT!
Evening news is where they begin with 'Good Evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isnt. HAHAHA!!
They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance. lol why risk it?
There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive
Life is full of disappointments, and I'm full of life! HAHA!!
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. yay, wait, hey!
Cheese… milk's leap toward immortality. hahaha!!
Lifes Tough, get a helmet lol
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths
The cops never find it as funny as you do
ONE FOR THE GIRLS!!:
(1) A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman alive." the woman replies, "I'll miss you..."
(3) Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for
(4) Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
Man: Where have you been all my life?
yes i do infact know that my profile is EXTREAMLY long!! but that's the way i like it!! ;)