I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUT be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion (I am against abortion in certain cases)
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I like YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist
To any and all who care... I am going to rant about a few pet peeves of mine...
1.) The phrase is NOT... "for all intensive purposes"
2.)a. Than... a comparative word.
b. Then... a word used to express time, or order of occurence.
Sorry!!! I just HAD to get that out of my system. These are two of the most common
Fun with Comic book characters. Pick 10.
2. Captain America
1 woke you up in the middle of the night?
I don’t know why he would do that unless he wanted to tell me he loved me or wanted to talk to me about something.
Number 2 asked you to go out with him?
Of course I'd go out with Steve- you just can't say no to him and he’s hot
Number 3 walked into the bathroom while you're showering?
Well I can only hope he doesn't pull out his steel claws out on me 0.0 I’d probably hit him upside the head.
4 announced she's going to marry 9 tomorrow?
Spiderman is going to marry Loki? Well, I know that they got along in the comics but that is ridiculous. Yuck.
5 cooked you dinner?
Tony cooked me dinner? Can I expect to be poisoned or drugged? I'm kidding, that's awesome! (As long as he can actually cook. He might have just actually burned it or just made Jarvis do it for him)
6 was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?
That is awesome! Hawkeye is super hot! But how did we get there in the first place? Did he shove some alcohol down my throat?
7 suddenly confessed to be part of your family?
I'm related to Bruce Wayne! EPIC!!!!! That would be amazing. Can I get to ride in the tumbler? Can I get to live in Wayne Manor?
8 got into the hospital somehow?
I’d take care of Nightwing to the best of my ability and try to find the creep who did that to him
9 made fun of your friends?
Loki made fun of my friends? Sounds like him so I’d come to expect it.
10 ignored you all the time?
Selina's mad just because I live in Wayne Manor
Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will 1 do?
Superman would save me like the nice guy he is. He’s such a sweet guy.
You're on a vacation with number 2 and manage to break your leg. What does 2 do?
Take me to a hospital- Steve is a good guy after all. He’d probably freak out first though. lol
It's your birthday. What will 3 give you?
What would I want from Wolverine... Is a hug too dangerous?
You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does 4 do?
Spiderman would save me, probably by using his Spidey-powers.
You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will 5 do?
Tony would probably film it for blackmail or tease me mercilessly for it until I punched him.
You're about to marry number 10. What's 6's reaction?
Clint's reaction to me marrying Selina... yeah, like that would ever happen! no way, jose.
You got dumped by someone. How will 7 cheer you up?
Let me shoot things or take a joyride with the tumbler or ask me out! At least I hope so
You're angry about it afterwards, how does 8 calm you down?
john Blake would most likely hug me and tell me the guy wasn’t worth it. He’d beat up the guy for me, too.
You compete in some tournament. How does 9 support you?
Loki support me?... He'd probably make me fail and then laugh in my face about it.
You can't stop laughing. What will 10 do?
She’d probably ignore me, Selina doesn’t care that much about me
Number 1 is all you've ever dreamed of. Why?
Duh, he's Clark Kent/Superman- he's incredibly sexy and is so sweet.
2 tells you about his deeply hidden love for number 9. Your reaction?
Wait, Steve loves Loki? I'd think Loki was mind-controlling him as a prank.
You're dating number 3 and introduce him to your parents. Will they get along?
Not sure how’d they’d get along… probably well if they found out if Wolverine protected me.
Number 4 loves number 9 as well. What does that mean?
Peter loves Loki as well? That is so wrong, and yet makes a good fighting match. I wonder who would win?
Will number 5 and 6 ever kiss?
No. Tony would have to be drunk and Clint would probably punch him in the face
6 appears to be a player, he breaks many hearts. What do you do?
Well he's Hawkeye. He can do what he wants. He probably uses his lovers as target practice.
You had a haircut and 7 can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?
Does my haircut suck? Or does Batman like it?
Number 8 thinks he'll never get a girlfriend. What will you tell him?
Of course John Blake will get a girlfriend... He already has me ;-)
Number 9 is too shy to face you and confesses you his love by sending an e-mail. Now what?
I'd ask him about it face to face, and then wonder how Loki knows how to use Email.
You spot 10 kissing number 1. How do you react?
Selina and Clark kissing? She probably seduced him… I don’t approve.
Could 1 and 6 be soulmates?
No. Clark and Clint would more likely have a bromance.
Would number 2 trust number 5?
Steve would trust Tony after he got to know Tony- Tony can be quite the handful. lol
Number 3 wants to go shopping, will 7 come along?
I don’t think so. Bruce would more likely ignore Logan.
Number 4 is bored and pokes number 10. What happens after that?
Selina would probably break Peter’s finger.
5 and 1 are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?
Clark and Tony? Tony would probably doing something Science-y. Either that, or something alcohol based. Clark, most likely journalism or criminal justice.
If 6 and 3 cooked dinner, what would they make?
Clint and Logan, I suppose something meat based. Either that or something microwaveable. Lol.
7 and 9 apply for a job. What job?
Bruce and Loki applying for a job, this has got to be one interesting job- magicians or ninjas ;)
8 gives 5 a haircut. Is that okay?
Does John Blake even know how to cut hair? Tony would probably look weird.
9 sketches what 6's perfect girlfriend should look like. Will 6 be happy?
No he won't- Loki isn't going to be nice to Clint.
10 and 8 are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?
Selina and Nightwing? Probably about Selina’s crush on Bruce.
What would happen if...
1 accidentally kicked 10?
Superman would break Selina’s leg. He’s super strong after all.
2 sent 9 an e-mail that was meant for his girlfriend?
Again, why does Loki have Email? And when did Steve discover it as well?
4 and 7 discovered they made love while being drunk?
Peter and Bruce? They would have to be stupidly drunk or Peter would be after the money.
5 and 6 did a work-out together?
Tony and Clint working out together? Clint would probably kill Tony after 5 minutes. Would be one funny workout. Lol.
6 noticed he wasn't invited for your birthday?
Tony probably somehow destroyed Clint’s invitation. I would feel so bad about it.
7 won the lottery?
Bruce already has money. He doesn’t need it.
8 had quite a big secret?
Nightwing is secret identity
9 became a singer?
I'd love to see Loki singing.
10 got a daughter?
Selina has a daughter? ... Seriously, who's the father?
What would 1 think of 2?
What does Clark think of Steve? They’d be best friends.
What would 2 find weird about 3?
The claws- or the fact that Logan is almost as old as Steve.
How would 3 greet 4?
With a hey- who knows how Peter would respond to meeting Wolverine.
What would 4 envy about 5?
Tony’s suit and/or money? Peter is broke.
What dream would 5 have about 6?
Clint would shoot Tony in Tony’s dream
What do 6 and 7 have in common?
Bruce and Clint both have secret identities
What would make 7 angry at 8?
That John Blake sucks at his job and that Bruce is better
Where would 8 meet 9?
John Blake would probably be in battle w/ Loki.
What would 9 never dare to tell 10?
A great many things- Loki isn't exactly the open type, especially to a woman like Selena.
What would make 10 scared of 1?
Selina would be scared of Superman’s strength and sense of justice
IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
Opening Credits: Summer Love / Set The Mood Prelude- Justin Timberlake & Timbaland
Waking Up: Northern Lights- Cider Sky
First Day At School: Dirt and Roses- Rise Against
Falling In Love: More- Usher
Fight Song: It’s Not Over- Daughtry
Breaking Up: It's Not Me It's You- Skillet
Prom night: Pump It- Black-Eyed Peas
Life: Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)- Florence The Machine
Mental Breakdown: Kingdom Dance- Alan Menken/Tangled Soundtrack
Driving: Domino- Jessie J
Flash Back: Back Here- BBMak
Getting Back Together: FUTURE IN MY HANDS- Aimee B/Elena Huston/Devil May Cry Soundtrack
Wedding: 君が追いかけた夢- GACKT/THE SIXTH DAYSINGLE COLLECTION
Birth of Child: Piece of Me- Britney Spears
Final Battle: Hurricane Drunk- Florence The Machine
Funeral Song(s) (Second is Optional): Nothing Out There- Hans Zimmer/ The Dark Knight Rises Soundtrack, Hero- Skillet
Final Credits (Put five!): How to Save a Life- The Fray, My Boy Builds Coffins- Florence The Machine, Solar Midnite- Lupe Fiasco, Horse With No Rider- Alan Menken/ TangledSoundtrack, I'm Alive- Shinedown/Avengers Assemble Soundtrack
A normal guy would say: “I love you Baby!”
Normal Guy would say: “I think I am falling for you.”
Normal Guy would say: “You hair looks like a haystack; go brush it!”
A normal guy would pick a random song from a random artist and dedicate it to you.
If you die, a normal guy would find another.
As you leave the house, a normal guy would say: “Bye, see ya!”
As you come back to the house, a normal guy would be watching TV and wouldn’t even notice.
A normal guy would wait for you to make him breakfast.
While you are both out for dinner, a normal guy wouldn’t keep his eyes off the sexy waitress.
A normal guy, while driving, would keep one hand on the wheel and one hand on the radio.
While far apart in different places, a normal guy would say: “I miss you.”
A normal guy wouldn’t care or notice if you had nightmares.
A normal guy buys you flowers and chocolates.
If you believe Jesus is the only way to be saved from your sins and is the only way to God, and therefore Heaven, copy and paste this onto your profile and add your name to the list:Kaisaan Greenleaf, Xaja Silversheen anakinpadmekenobi, My Lady Vader, Crystal Prime, BellaGirl7
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
WHAT A KISS MEANS
Kiss on the stomach = "I'm ready"
What the gesture means...
I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
Whenever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlie’s sake of course
And I promise to remember Jacob
When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
Whenever I am in the emergency room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to remember Rose
Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful bronze hair
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes, I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know
I hope you enjoy reading my awesome stories!
Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! Did you know that 93 percent of the people that read this won’t repost it?