Blonde K
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Joined 12-03-08, id: 1759386, Profile Updated: 11-02-09
Author has written 3 stories for Gallagher Girls, and Twilight.

Hey all!

Im Katie! i love reading and would love to be a writer some day, but for now my life is nothing more than school, gymnastics and work. Gymnastics is my life - i had done it for so long and have made so many friends through it. My personal favourite book series' are Twilight and the Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging series. I couldnt live with out my ipod as it helps me through all situations. And i would die if i didn't have chocolate - funny that being a gymnast and all.

yay! i am a big taylor swift fan and she is came to Oz! I went up to sydney for her concert and it was the most amazing thing ever!! she is so good live and i recomed her to everyone, her style may be contry but she sure knows how to rock out. my favourite songs that she sings are 'Love Story' 'You Belong with Me' and 'Im Only Me when Im With You'.

I would like to make a shout out to all my friends, you guys are the best and i love you with all my heart and soul - never forget it. To the horn mister, for introducing me to the Angus Thongs and Perfect Snogging series. To my buddie The Cadster who has stuck with me through everything and put up with me stealing all her good books. To B, L and R my favourtie twilight loving pals You Rock - but i think you already know that. And lastly to my crazy friends on the bus you guys are insane!

i would just like to say the i love the songs 'seasons of love', 'five years from now', 'Travellin soldier' and 'cowboy take me away' nomatter how old they are and how old they get i will always love them!!


Im the type of girl who laughs at a joke three times, first - when its said, second - whaen its explained, and thirdly - five minutes later when i actually get it! No joke this is actually me, i am actually a really smart person and do really well in school, but some how i am also a real ditz and can make a fool of myself in any situation.

Oh My Giddygodspyjamas!! the last Angus, thongs and perfect snogging book is finally here !! it was amazing i loved it sooooooo much cant believe the series is finally over...sniff snifff... ah well im away laughing on a fast camel!

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, ReganBaxter, the7thflockmember, wannabegg, Blonde k

I just have to say that i have herd some interesting pick up lines over the years but i think i have found my personal favourite as told by the horn mister:


The Twilight Oath

I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
Whenever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlies sake of course
And I promise to remember Jacob
When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
When ever I am in the emergency room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to to remember Rose
Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful bronze hair
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love

'Never Argue With A Woman'

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out.

She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to read her book. The peace and solitude are magnificent.

Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat.

He pulls up alongside the woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am.What are you doing?'

'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?').

'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her.

'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.'

'Yes, but I see you have all the equipment.

For all I know you could startat any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up.'

'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says the woman.

'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."

'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.
It's likely she can also think


someone should seriosly sue walt disney for making every girl believe she has a prince charming

lets flip a coin, heads we stay together, tails we flip again

cracks in the concrete remind us that no matter how strong we are we break

He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight

A word to the wise ain't necessary -- it's the stupid ones that need the advice

Dont take life to seriosly, you'll never get out of it alive

i wish i was eight again because all he had to do was tag me and i was it

'BEAUTIFUL' what a perfect little lie

If at first you dont suceed ask him if he has a brother

the dinosaur extinction wasn't an accident - barney came and they all commited suicide

you can ask permission now or beg forgiveness later

never regret what once made you smile

It is better to be seventy years young than to be fourty years old

stupidity killed the cat, curiosity was framed

Im a little tea pot shourt and stout. Here is my handle her is my... well i'll be damned i'm a sugar bowl

I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it

The difference between humour and tradgety is that humor is when it happens to someone else

Pretty girls turn heads, My girls break necks

Sometimes you make me so made i want to throw you into ongoing trafic, but then i realize that i would probably kill myself trying to save you

If you live to be 100 i want to be 100 minus one day so i will never have to live without you

they say love is like magic, but isnt magic an illusion

If he's dumb enough to walk away, be smart enough to leet him go

if nothing lasts forever, can i be your nothing

You laugh now because you are mere months older than me, but when your 30 and im still 29 who will be laughing then

succes is not final, failure is not fatal, it is the courage to continue that counts

Always forgive your enimies, nothing annoys them more

LOVE... the slowest form of suicide

Remember, God made men first because you always need a rough draft before you make perfection

do you have a map cuz im lost in your eyes

its not cheagting untill you get caught

THERAPIST=THE RAPIST... scary thought

life is not passing me by, it is trying to run me over

i love you is spelt with eight letters, but so is bullshit

best friend - spelt with ten letters, but so is lying bitch

do you believe in love at first sight or should i walk past again

do something that scares you every day

Boy: why do you wear a bra if you cant fill it?
Girl: why do you wear pants? ahahahaha i always wanted to say that to a guy!

dont save anything for a special occasion, every day your alive is a special occasion

good friends pick you up when you fall, best friends push you back down and laugh

confucious says ; 'man who walks around with hand in pocket will feel cocky all day

confucious says; 'man who walks through airport gate side ways is going to bankok

officer i swear to drunk im not god

good friends come bail you out of jail, best friends are the sitting next to you saying 'hey atleast we had fun'

my imaginary friends think you have problems

shock me... say something inteligent

people who say anythings possible have clearly never tried to slam a revolving door

i think your breaking my gay-dar

everyones entitled to be stupid but your just abusing the privalige

it takes 42 muscles to frown at the person who is annoying you but only 4 to reach out and bitch slapp them

remember what you just said cuz tomorrow i am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be sorry then

your not yourself today, i noticed the improvement imediatly

percussive maintenence - the art of wacking the crap of an electronic device to make it work again

was that an earthquake or did i just rock your world

anyone who says easy as taking candy from a baby has clearly never tried it

when your right no one remembers, when your wrong no one forgets

i agree with the dictionary: girls before guys, partying before studying and friends before love

it seems that the only place where the dictionary went wrong was when it put boys before friends

they laugh at me beacuse im different, i laugh at them because they're all the same

my knight in shining armour turned out to be loser in aluminium foil

someday your prince will come, mine just took a wrong turn along the way and had to stop and ask directions

im not retarded i just like licking windows

everyone has a wild side im just better at showing it

when people dont laugh at our jokes i dont think of it as a you had to be there thing but more like a you have to be mentally retarted like us thing

sometimes i lay awake at night an think to myself 'where did i go wrong' and a voice answers me 'this is going to take more than one night'

one if four suffer from mental illness, think of your three best friends, if their ok then its you

smile - it makes people wonder what your up to

i was going to take over the world but i got distracted by something sparkly

birthdays can be torture... especially with friends who won't let you off the hook

you never loose by loving, you loose by holding back

a friend is a gift you give yourself

from what we get we can make a living, whet we give however makes a life

If you judge someone you have no time to love them

there are always to choices, two paths to choose from, one is easy... and its only reward is that its easy

dont try hard to fit in you were born to stand out

life is full of risks, it requires you to jump. dont be afraid of the unknown, be afraid of never getting the chance to discover it

yesterdays history, tommorows a mystery and todays a gift, i guess thats why the call it present

its never to late to be what you might have been

work like you don't need money, love like you've never been hurt and dance like no ones watching

boys are like purses - cute, full of crap, and always replaceable

boys are like slinkies, useless but fun to watch fall down the stairs

grandparents and grandchildren get on so well because they have a common ememy

great now hes a dazzling vampire and im just the emo boy who lived

if you were a burger at McDonalds you would be the McGorgeous

dont follow in my footsteps i tend to walk into walls

ametures built the ark proffesionals built the titanic

my mum says i cant cross the road unless i hold someones hand - funny pickup line (zac you are an idiot!)

whats the difference between you and me?? when we said i love you i actually ment it

did you just call me a bitch cuz a bitch is a dog, dogs bark, bark is on trees, trees are part of nature and nature is beautiful, i know im beautiful thanks for embracing it

if the grass is greener on the other side you can bet the water bill is higher

i called you boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse

i never apolagise, im sorry but thats just the way i am

STUPID = Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand

im not as think as you dumb i am

life is not measured by the breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away

don't regret doing things. regret getting caught

learn from other peoples mistakes, because you cant live long enough to make them all yourself

birdie birdie in the sky why'd you do that in my eye, looks like sugar tastes like sap OMG its birdie crap

they say the truth will set you free so why is it that whenever i tell the truth i get sent to my room

men are like pennies two faced and worthless

god made mud, god made dirt, god made guys so girls could flirt

if aliens are looking for inteligent life then why are you worried

we're all pretty bizare, some of us are just better at showing it

always use the advice someone gives you against them, theres nothing funnier

judge me i'll prove you wrong, tell me what to do i'll tell you off, say im not worth it watch where i end up call me a bitch i'll show you one, call me crazy but really you have no idea

we're the type of friends who dont know why were laughing so we laugh even harder

life is like a pack of gum... i have yet to figure out why

if it wern't for electricity we'd all be watching TV by candlelight

im not random im just -Ooh look a kitty

we could all take a lesson from crayons, some are sharp some are beautiful some have weird names all are different colours but they all learn to live in the same box

life all about ass everyones either covering it, laughing it off, kicking it, kissing it, trying to get a piece of it or simply just being one

its always the last place you look, ofcourse it is why would i keep looking once i've found it

i used to be normal befpre i met the freaks i call my friends

boys are like trees they take fifty years to grow up

im one of those really bad things that happens to poor undeserving people

the problem is you can love anybody you want, but so can he

it funny, the people with the closed minds are usually the ones that open their mouths

heaven doesn't want me there and hell knows i'll take over

the evening news is where they begin by saying 'good evening' then proceed to tell you why its not

marrige is not a word, its a sentence (a life sentence)

computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes

anywhere is walking distance if you've got the time

the quickest way to end a war is to loose it

join the army, go to exotic places, meet interesting people, kill them

i have lots of ideas, trouble is most of them suck (same can be said for the ideas for my up coming fanfics)

a synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of

i am an excellent house keeper, whenever i get a divorce i keep the house

marriage is the only war where you sleep with the enemy

an apple a day keeps the doctor away, if the doctors cute screw the fruit

your so stupid you got stabbed in a shoot out

going to church doesn't make you christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car

if you think it can't get any worse its probably because you lack sufficent imagination

i once prayed to god for a bike but quickly found out that god doesn't work that way so i stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness

the secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

parents spend the first half of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are vegaterian

opimism: waiting for a ship to come in when you haven't sent one out

i am so clever that sometimes i don't understand a single word of what im saying

books have knowledge knowledge is power power corupps coruption is a crime and crime doesnt pay so if you keep reading you'll go broke

eat right, excersise reguarly, die anyway

friendship is like peeing on yourself, everyone can see it but only you can feel its true warmth

the average woman would rather have beauty then brains because the average mancan see bettere then he can think

behind every succesful man is a very suprised woman

if barbie is so popular why do you have to but her friends

the greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you cannot do

when i was kidnapped my parents snapped into action, the rented my room out

everyone is entitled to their own opinion its just that yours is stupid

i am n ot a vegatarian because i love animals, i am a vegatarian because i hate plants

man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain

if love is blind why is lingerie so poular

there is a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore like an idiot

money doesn't make you happyy, i now have 50 million dollars and i am just as happy as when i only had 48 million

its easy to smile when you know your always right

never admit never explain

if i had a star for every time you made smile i would have the entire galaxy in the palm of my hand

love is neither true or false, love is love


sometimes i wonder why the frisbee is getting bigger... then i get hit in the face

fake is the new trend, i guess everyone is in style

copying from a single source is called plagerism, copying from multiplue sources, however, is called research

do not disturb, im disturbed enough as it is

last night as i lay in bed looking at the stars in the sky i thought to myself ... WHERE THE HECK IS THE CELING?

93 of american teens would have a breakdown if you called them freak, the other 7 would say 'what was your first clue'

somebody needs a happy meal!

music is like candy - you throw away the rappers

i smile because i have no idea whats going on

if at first you dont succed, proced to distroy all evidence showing tat you tried

flying is simple, just throw yourself at the ground and miss

I dont suffer from insanity, i enjoy every bit of it

dont knock on deaths door, ring the bell and run - he hates that

oooh a life where can i download one?

That is the truest sign of insanity--insane people are always sure they are fine. It is only the sane people that are willing to admit that they are crazy.

He who laughs last didn't get it

trying is the first step towards failure

i didn't say it was your fault, i said i was going to blame you

Im the person your mum warned you about

I'm sick of people having a near death experience saying 'I saw the light,' do you know the first thing the paramedics do when they first arrive? They shine a light in your eyes! That's not God, it's a torch for crying out loud!

let a simle be your umbrella - but plan on getting soaked

when giant fluffy bunnies take over the earth im not saving your ass

everyone makes mistakes, the trick is to make them when no one is looking

i find 'good moring' a contradiction of term

i used to have an open mind but my brain kept falling out

when mamma ain't happy ain't nobody happy, when daddy ain't happy ain't nobody care

mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young

love is like war, easy to start, hard to end, impossible to forget

one day we will look back on this laugh nervously and change the subject

when he catches you looking at him just remember he was looking back

i stay as confused as a gangster on a skateboard

its all fun and games till the other person looses their sanity

im not insane, i just do what the voices tell me

i was gifted untill my psychatrist took my powers away

You say I'm not cool, cool is another word for cold, If I'm not cool then I'm hot, I know I'm hot thanks for embracing it.

Im the kind of girl who will burst out laughing in a dead silence about something that happened yesterday

at my lemonade stall i give the first glass for free and charge five dollars for the second - it contained the antidote

happiness is you dentist saying it wont hurt a bit, and then he catches his hand in the drill

lets play truth or dare, or maybe just dare cuz no one tells the truth these days

if you want to know what god thinks of money, just look at the people he gave it to

i like you - when the world is mine your death will be quick and painless

education is important, school however is another matter

a computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match at kick boxing

there are no stupid questions just stupid people

i only please one person a day, today is not your day and tomorrow isn't looking good either

boys are like skatebards, they can go fast but are usually pretty slow

if at first you dont succeed don't try sky diving

-if its green and wiggles its biology
-if it stinks it chemistry
-if it desnt work its physics

The High School Poem (LOL)

The freshman girl, oh so shy, sits & watches the sophomore guy.

The sophomore guy, with his head in a whirl, sits & watches the junior girl.

The junior girl, in her red sedan, sits & watches the senior man.

But the senior man, all hot & wild, secretly loves the freshman child.

My Mother Taught Me…

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
"5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."
9. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favourite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"


1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and
point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want
fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has
gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling

7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious

11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

12. Sing along at the opera.

13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical
sounds all day at work.

14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their
party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"

18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot
yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner "due to the economy, we are
going to have to let one of you go."

20. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity . . .
e-mail this to someone to make them smile and laugh. Its called therapy.


whos cruel idea was it for lisp to have and s in it?

are children what act in 'R' rated films allowed to see them?

If the sky is the limit then what is space, over the limit??

If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out." ?

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out of its butt."?

Isn't Disneyland just a people trap operated by a mouse?

Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in 'mother in law', they come out to 'Woman Hitler'?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning many, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?

Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are crazy?

Why is it when some products you have to turn upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn down?

If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

If you can't drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?

If you jog backwards, will you gain weight?

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers?

If corn oil is made from corn, where do we get baby oil from?

If rabbits' feet are so lucky, then what happened to the rabbit?


me: you know the mouse changes colour?
sarah: excuse me
me: the mouse duh! look, yellow white yellow white
sarah: thats genius

abbs: (paying me out about something i did)
me: hey im blonde whats your excuse
abbs: im blonde too you idiot!

me: did you know that in your life time you swallow eight spiders in your sleep
britt: ewwwww that is gross
cait: but what if it like bit you??
abbs: thats how old people die in their sleep!

erin: yeah apparently in like 2020 the axis of the earth is going to change
me: really, will it become a square
soph: um no the axis will change
me: oh
erin: you know, the angle of the earth
me: ohhhh i get it!
soph+erin: oh god

abbs: hey look
soph: what
abbs: i got two straws incase one breaks!
soph: thats genius

running stranger: a bee, a bee is following me!
abbey: no im not

me: look at my arm
soph: its red... why?
me: i pinched it
soph: why did you pinch your arm
me: i didn't it got stuck between the desk and the chair
soph: oh, well ok then

britt: argh!
soph: what
britt: you got that song stuck in my head
soph: oh, i thought you must have found an worm in your apple or something
britt: no that would be more exagerated like aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!

abbs: hey dont you think that leaf looks like a mouse
liv: no
macki: what
soph: yea i see it
cat: excuse me
abbs: it really does doesn't it
soph: yea
mackie: what
abbs: see we have very imaginative minds
soph: yes we do
cat: any one know what their talking about??

me: this water tastes like mamee noodles... it doesn't smell like mamee noodles though, it smells like grass
soph: um ok then

liv: the other day a bird hit our windscreen and threw up

liv: albania, thats where albinos come from
abbs: really wow

abbs mum: we have wog in us
abbs sister: cool so we're from wagga wagga

"what would you do if i exploded right now"
"well i'd be dead to so..."
"no i mean if i like imploded, just a little bomb"
"i'd laugh"

(me applying for job at maccas, liv + abbs work at maccas already)
me: a smart person like me shouldn't be working at maccas
liv: hey
abbs: you'd be suprised
abbs: hey! what are you trying to say
me: you would have to be despreate to work at maccas your whole life and pretty dumb
(both turn and look at liv)
abbs: that maccas future manager for you
liv: (is trying to fit a box into a smaller space than the actual box, bang bang bang)
abbs+me: giggle
liv: hey (pulls out another box) i thought this said sea biscuit, it doesn't it says sea battle
abbs+me: fall off chair laughing
liv: (goes back to first box bang bang bang)
abbs+me: rolling around on the floor laughing
liv: guys what are you laughing at
abbs+me: absoulutly wetting ourselves laughing whilst still rolling around on the floor

Liv: OMG its a birds head!!
abbs: katie why is there a dead bird in your room??
me: guys there is no bird
liv: yes there is look (picks up and throws at me)
abbs: aaarrrggghhh!
me: guys its a bundle of feathers - from my craft stuff
abbs: alas it is!

madds: father when was the car made? was it like the sevenies?
dad: nos madds it was made in 1994
me: OMG that was the year before i was born
madds: your such a retard
me: wait...(counting on fingers) never mind peoples i cant count
dad: god what will i do with you?

Andrew: nice santa hat mitch
Mitch: i no i have been wearing it all day
Dad: so are you santa claus them mitch?
Mitch: yes i am
Andrew: you will have to put on some weight them wont you
Mitch: yea
Dad: laughing
Me: why does he have to put on weight
Andrew+Dad: oh god katie

Britt: this is my word of the day; Agrum
me: what?
Britt: it rhymes with bread crumb!

Ellie: i hate musicals they are so annoying
me: what about the sound of music
Soph: yea that hills are alive song
me: i know all the words to that song
me: the trees are alive with the sound of music...
everyone: pissing themselves laughing
soph: no... its the hills

(listening to song pokerface+watching the video)
Me: hey whats on her face?
Britt: poker-face, it is the face you have when you lie... laughing
Me: umm... yes britt but what is on her face??

(waqtching TV a man is on a guitar boat)
Britt: hahaha look at the boat... what if one of the strings broke
me: oh God Britt
Britt: what?! it could happen

Me: yea pretty much i burnt my stomach melting chocolate... i will never wear a bikini again
Lau: why were you melting chocolate in your bikini?

abbs: pizza, pizza, pizza!
me: pizza rhymes with loser
me: actually... no it doesn't

(lau is reading back of ricebubbles packet)
Lau: snap, crackle, pop... they don't do that, that is false advertising
me: yes they do listen
lau: look at that, they do!
Lau: ive never liked ricebubbles, they are like cocopos but white

Lau: we used to play teachers when we were little, britt was always the teacher and i would be the assistant
britt: yeah... i remember
lau: we used to rouund up all the toys and there was that dinosaur... barney... you no the ortistic one
britt: lau!!

Lau: eleanor i could see you as a gold digger
Ellie: Thanks lau
Mackie: yea butn she would have to be the head of the industry though, i cant see eleanor in the mine feilds digging for gold
Me: what?!
Me+Lau+Ellie: laughing hysterically
lau: mackie dont you know what a gold diger is

(listen to ipod threw car sterio)
music turns up really loud cuz i accidentally drop the ipod
Mum: katie turn the music down!!
Me: sorry i droped the ice cream
Mum: you droped the ice cream??
Me: exactly!

Madds: keep your eyes peeled we cant miss it!
(ten minutes later...)
Madds: that would hurt... if you peeled your eyes

Abbey: what are you throwing at me? stop!
Ellie: jeez its just and acorn or racoon or whatever
Me: what??
Ellie: acorn , racoon same thing
Me: haven't you ever seen pocahontas
Ellie: no, i dont like egyption movies
Abbey: pocahontas was indian!!

Erin: -9 times -9 = 81 fish jumps in the water shark in the water no more fish
(creepy irish accent)

Rach: that looks like a seventeen
Me: yeah and the easter bunny looks like a chicken

A True Boyfriend =

When she walks away from you mad
Follow her

When she stare's at your mouth
Kiss her

When she pushes you or hit's you
Grab her and dont let go

When she start's cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong

When she ignore's you
Give her your attention

When she pull's away
Pull her back

When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying
Just hold her and dont say a word

When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared
Protect her

When she lay's her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steal's your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she tease's you
Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesnt answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay

When she look's at you with doubt
Back yourself up

When she say's that she like's you
she really does more than you could understand

When she grab's at your hands
Hold her's and play with her fingers

When she bump's into you
bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tell's you a secret
keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes
dont look away until she does

When she misses you
she's hurting inside

When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away

When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers

When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it -

Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.-

When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go-

When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you-

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-

Call her before you sleep and after you wake up-

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-

Tease her and let her tease you back.-

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-

Give her the world.-

Let her wear your clothes.-

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-

Let her know she's important.-

Kiss her in the pouring rain.-

When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"

Hey, i hope everyone is awesome at the moment! i am writing a new story at the moment but i am not going to put it nup untill i have the first couple of chapters ready and then i will see what you guys think. thanx for being really supportinve of both my stories so far and i am sorry that it has been takeing so long to update, yes i am lazy so you can all send me angry PM's but i am trying. see you all soon!

aka katie :)

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Hard Way To Learn A Lesson by Stephaniiie reviews
AU/AH Bad boy Edward needs to be taught a lesson. So his teachers come up with a plan- ‘marry’ him to the best behaved girl in school! How will his ego survive spending ‘eternity’ with Bella Swan! Little OOC. NOW COMPLETE!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 69 - Words: 278,367 - Reviews: 16175 - Favs: 7,981 - Follows: 3,642 - Updated: 8/15/2021 - Published: 6/23/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Fighting Temptation by Dobber17 reviews
High school classmates Bella, Edward, Mike, and Tyler are invited to a basketball clinic in Seattle for 2 weeks. Bella is sharing a hotel room with the guys. Between truth or dare, streaking, jealousy, and a growing attraction between Edward and Bella ... what could possibly go wrong? ExB. AH.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 60,187 - Reviews: 3412 - Favs: 2,168 - Follows: 1,381 - Updated: 12/5/2018 - Published: 3/14/2008
If Every Word I Said Could Make You Laugh by carmelinagunn reviews
Bella moved to LA and has found "sisters" in 2 of her school mates. They meet 3 brothers in their new apt building & experiences love in more ways than one, in more depth than she knew was possible. Zip up your love. Read IEWIS. AH, regular pairings.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 46 - Words: 291,233 - Reviews: 5144 - Favs: 5,558 - Follows: 1,582 - Updated: 5/29/2014 - Published: 7/9/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Uninvited by luabunny reviews
Bella Swan has always spent her summer vacations with the Cullen family since her mother died, even though she despises their younger son, Edward. What happens when they're forced to live alone and their feelings start to get mixed up? AU, AH. ExB
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 34 - Words: 107,247 - Reviews: 1852 - Favs: 1,861 - Follows: 1,972 - Updated: 9/7/2012 - Published: 12/27/2008 - Edward, Bella
Something New and Real by BellazB reviews
Edward is 23 and a single father of two. All the girls want his money and Edward hates that. What happens when he meets Bella and her son? Will things change even if Bella is the nannie of Edward's children?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 27,136 - Reviews: 1176 - Favs: 1,078 - Follows: 519 - Updated: 4/24/2011 - Published: 12/11/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Perfect Score by iwantyourjeep reviews
When Bella, a gymnast, takes a big fall at the nationals, her career could be ruined. She decides to turn over a new leaf and move cross the country where drama awaits her. There she mets the mysterious Cullen Family. OOC R&R!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 31 - Words: 39,163 - Reviews: 326 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 183 - Updated: 8/2/2010 - Published: 1/16/2009 - Bella, Edward
More Than Meets The Eye by kasplosion reviews
The saying goes, "It's the inside that counts," but when you're a spy, what you look and act like on the outside matters more.
Gallagher Girls - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,369 - Reviews: 255 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 8/29/2009 - Published: 10/12/2008 - Cammie M.
From Dawn To Twilight by Cometakeawalkwithme reviews
When he left her, he promised a clean break. Years after her "death", the Cullens go to Volterra and meet a new, powerful Bella- who isn't what she always was. Will hearts mend? Or will she keep running away from the man who once broke her heart? Stars/Vp
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 17,362 - Reviews: 679 - Favs: 509 - Follows: 600 - Updated: 7/16/2009 - Published: 6/3/2008 - Bella, Edward
Only if you go out with me, Evans by NeverAPrefect reviews
I was a horrid, horrid person. A miserable excuse for a friend. It should have been the easiest thing. Tell the boy you hate that your best mate fancies him. But I couldn't. Why? Because I fancied James Potter. Er...SINCE WHEN, LILY!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 60,057 - Reviews: 439 - Favs: 248 - Follows: 141 - Updated: 6/12/2009 - Published: 6/23/2008 - James P., Lily Evans P. - Complete
I Love To Hate You by An End Has A Start reviews
He loves her. She hates him. He’s trying to win her over but in the screwed up world that is highschool things are never that simple. ExB All Human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 45 - Words: 117,156 - Reviews: 3253 - Favs: 1,699 - Follows: 799 - Updated: 4/14/2009 - Published: 10/16/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bestest Friends by Your yellow flower reviews
Lily and James are best friends when they were little until Lily moves to France. She moves back to London 9 years later. At first the pair are happy to meet again until the other kids in school get jealous of the new girl being best friends with James.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,402 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 3/27/2009 - Published: 2/17/2008 - James P., Lily Luna P.
Learning To Fall by A Kind Kiss reviews
Leaving her past, Bella moves to Forks one summer and finds that her father has turned the house into a boarding house! There she meets five extraordinary people, including one boy who makes the unexpected happen. AU, All Human. Full Summary Inside.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 22 - Words: 103,648 - Reviews: 642 - Favs: 601 - Follows: 347 - Updated: 2/13/2009 - Published: 4/19/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Sporting World, Here I Come by Doomed.Youth reviews
What happens when Bella/Balin decides to go to a sporting school for exceptional young boys? And when you give Balin a pair of Chuck Taylors and a basketball? All will be revealed! All Human, OCC. T- maybe for language.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 25,150 - Reviews: 216 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 1/28/2009 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Puppy Love by Violet Eliot reviews
Jacob and Leah; Do two broken hearts make a whole? Or does a relationship built on pain end similarly? And where does Embry Call fit into all of this? Read to find out more.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 17 - Words: 30,567 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 9/23/2008 - Leah - Complete
Save me by AliceMCullen reviews
Twist to the Jacob and Leah scene next to the cliff at the end of Eclipse. How can a single tear change the course of things? Jacob/Leah *Intended to be one shot but not anymore*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 12,659 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 12/26/2008 - Published: 1/16/2008 - Leah, Jacob
Another by proximityinfatuation reviews
Leah never thought that she could fall in love again, but what happens if she does, and it was with the most forbidden person?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,293 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 10/21/2008 - Published: 9/30/2008 - Leah
Breaking Dawn Sing Along! by LindaRoo reviews
American Pie" by Don McLean set to the plot of Breaking Dawn. You'll laugh.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 976 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Bella, Edward
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Bella in a Wheelchair reviews
Bella was in accident that has left her wheelchair bound and alone. Her mother cannot cope wih her new found disability and she is sent to live with her father. will the Cullens come into her life, and can they help her to find a place where she belongs.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,594 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 57 - Published: 6/6/2009 - Bella
A Black Mission reviews
When Cammie and the girls are sent on a mission that will changethem forever, the things they have studied their whole lives will be tested.How far are the girls willing to go to save the ones they love and how will iteffect their trusted friendship.
Gallagher Girls - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,514 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 4/25/2009 - Published: 12/17/2008
Not What I Expected reviews
Three years after leaving the Academy Cammie falls pregnant with Zach's child, but when Zach finds out he disapears off the face of the earth, leaving cammie to pick up the pieces of her broken heart
Gallagher Girls - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 772 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 22 - Published: 1/26/2009