Author has written 4 stories for Harry Potter.
Late-thirties legal professional with the tendency to lurk. Likes cheese, grumpy men, and cats. Dislikes raspberry jam with seeds and those silicon packets that you aren't supposed to eat. I rarely give out comments as I think the stories I follow get along swimmingly without me piping in. I do have some M-rated fanfic pet peeves, however:
1. Getting breathless and dizzy from kissing. Seriously people.. breathe through the nose. It's not difficult.
2. Authors (especially female) not knowing what the hymen is, or where it is located. Did you never take a human sexuality/reproduction class?
3. Pairings in Potterfics that make no sense according to the characters' personalities. While there are some very well-written slash, threesome fics, or others that depict non-canon relationships (honestly...Hermione with Severus or Draco makes a helluva lot more sense than her with Ron..) and do so convincingly as part of the story, for the most part...ummm... sorry, I don't think that Snape will be with Ron, etc. (not disparaging anyone's story here, just a personal opinion).
4. MPreg. I know in Potterverse there's 'magic' and whatnot, but...seriously? Do they just conjure up ovaries, a uterus, and all the requisite hormones? How do you deal with organ displacement or the fact that a man's pelvis isn't designed to spread?
5. Last but not least: language and grammar. I see a ton of Potterfics that have the characters' dialog in very modern, American slang. They're British, and depending on what "class" they're in or age, some of them, like the older generations or families like the Malfoys, would probably never use a contraction in a sentence. (I try to catch this in my own work, and yes...I slip from time to time, but I find it irksome).
Moreover...I do not care what 'verse a story takes place in...spellcheck, spellcheck, spellcheck! I know, even with this nifty and commonplace widget, a few words will get through (no one is perfect, including myself), but when nearly every word is incorrect or misspelled, there is no way I, or many other people, would be able to read the story for long. If you can't be bothered to correct the mistakes, get a Beta, who will do it for you.
So, I bit the bullet and started to upload my stories to this site. They will be WIPs, and I will attempt to update as regularly as those pesky things called "life" and "a job" allow. Feel free to check them out and review, although I shall state right now that I will welcome criticism (especially constructive), advice, suggestions (may not follow them, though), and will tolerate some negativity (everyone has their own tastes, and my story may not fit); however, I will not tolerate rudeness, whining, insults, or any "flaming". If you do not like a story THAT much... here's a novel idea: DON'T READ IT!
Laws of Law: Chap. 7 outfits to Slughorn's party