Knighted Fantasy
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Joined 12-20-08, id: 1776300, Profile Updated: 12-28-10
Author has written 2 stories for Inkheart, and Phantom of the Opera.

Hey, I got a Tumblr; take a second and check it out. It's just me being real about my life with anyone who cares to take a look. You can ask me questions and such if you like.
Anyhoo, here's the link: http:///

Well...for starters I'm Knighted Fantasy...Welcome to my world.
Tread softly and be aware; many lose themselves here or worse...they find themselves.
God is very real. If you look for Him, you'll find this is true.
Your regular, physical fears (spiders, dark, storms, drowning, heights, ect) have no hold on me.
True love is the strongest thing you will ever find. It cannot be explained; it cannot be tamed.
I might as well be an empath. There is only one person whose emotions are never clear to me.
It is possible to become addicted to a person, as opposed to drugs.
I have found that person who is my drug.
If you lose yourself you lose everything.
Sometimes something needs to break before it can be improved.
Right when you think you finally know who you are, think again. You'll surprise yourself.
Losing the one thing your world revolved around breaks you...changes you beyond what you thought was possible.
What we do in the name of pleasure often brings us the most pain.
It used to take a lot to make me cry. It was an extremely rare phenomenon...and then I broke.
Speaking of breaking, my heart has be honestly broken. Twice. By the same person. And it wasn't even their fault.
I'm too mature for my own good. I'm basically 4 years older, but trapped in a younger body.
In a few years, I'm pretty sure I'll basically be alone. My closest friends will be in college or just escaping this town.
I have trust issues because I have been betrayed too many times. There is only one person who I can tell literally ANYTHING to.
I am a coffee snob. My parents now run a cafe and I MUST have GOOD coffee, not cheap crap.
Thanks for reading my randomness. You now have two choices: Read on if you dare, or run away screaming.

RRN! (Random Recent News):
- Been riding horses again. Myy boy's name is Stepper; he's very tall and handsome(: He's a lovely chestnut/red kinda color. He's strong and fast. And he tends to be a stubborn pain in the butt. Just the kinda horse I love(:
- My heart's been broken for the second time...by the same person...and once again, it wasn't their fault.
- Chrismas was pretty great. No holiday tragedies, disasters, fights, or anything of the sort! Woo hoo!
- Gonna be starting guitar lessons in January with this guy who's known locally for being a really awesome teacher. Shadow (my guitar, duhh) and I are excited(:
-There'll be wedding bells soon! My best friend, who has become my sister,should be getting engaged soon! So, sooo crazy! And guess who gets to be Maid of Honor? (:
- So, I put this lotion on my hands. Turns out it's really strong. And now, it's burning my nostrils. Whoop de doo.

Relationship Status:
Long story short: Single

My Interests: I love to write obviously. I love getting into peoples' heads and finding out what they're thinking, feeling (I wanna go into criminal psychology, haha). I can read some like open books. Like I said above, I might as well be an empath.
I also enjoy reading, drawing, listening to music, riding horses, dancing, acting...acting is a HUGE passion of mine. I also love nature...you know, hiking, camping...anything that involves me in a forest. I have a strange obsession with wolves.

The Fam: I live w/ my mom, step dad Brett, and four siblings, Nate (bro 11), BreaAnn (sis 7), Micah (sis 5), and Anikka (sis 3). My real dad lives in another city and I get to see him once a month if I'm lucky. He's great, I love visiting him, it isn't his fault that I don't get to see him that often. Other family members...there are so many I can't even start!

My music: I love music. It's something that really matters a lot to me. I pretty much listen to rock, hard rock, that sorta stuff. I don't really have a favorite band, I go through phases where I like some over others, but it changes a lot. Some that I like are Three Days Grace, Nickleback, Lifehouse, Evanesance, Coldplay, Within Temptation, Linkin Park, Red, 12 Stones, Daughtry, Thousand Foot Krutch...stuff like that. And I'm also my dad's band's biggest fan! Go Prior Sin!
As far as my own musical talent...I play trumpet in school band, and I'm the singer in a band my friend started up called Isle 17.

My books: I love fantasy...I read other stuff, but not that often. I'm willing to read anything about vampires. The three best books in the universe are Inkheart, Inkspell, and Inkdeath. Some of my other fav books/series are (and this is not near all of them!) the Harry Potter series, Inheritance trilogy (well i guess that's not gonna be a trilogy anymore shrugs), House of Night, Wheel of Time series, The Ranger's Apprentice Series, anything by Ted Dekker, The Chronicals of Narnia,The Alex Rider Series, and a lot more...believe me!

My TV/Movies: TV, as long as it's not a soap opera, or a reality show that's all about backstabbing and drama, I'm good most of the time. I actually don't have TV at my house anymore...soooo...well I don't watch much! I've been borrowing Heroes from some friends though and it is the best show EVER (Zachary Quinto helps makes it hot- er, I mean better)! (wink wink nudge nudge). I do order the Buffy the Vampire Slayer series on Netflix too...And I also just started getting Supernatural on Netlix. It seems pretty good so far. Movies...again...pretty much anything (especially if it's got something to do with vampires!)

Books I Plan On Getting Published: I'm not gonna say too much...I might be paranoid...but I'm gonna be a paranoid person who's ideas are safe. At the moment I am working a novel. It's called Gifted. It's kinda a fantasy/adventure type thing. It's the first in a series I'm planning on writing. I'm quite far in it. I'm hoping to get it published. There was a different book I was working on...but it's gonna take a lot of work, and I think Gifted will be more successful anyways. I have A LOT of ideas for more books...hopefully I'll get them published some day.


Random quotes 'n stuff:

"You still think this is a dream, don't you?"
"It seems like it."
"You want to know how I know this isn't a dream?"
"How?"
"Because when you have a nightmare you're relieved that it wasn't real when you wake up. When you have a good dream you wake up, and it's the worst feeling in the world knowing it didn't really happen."
"Hm. Where have I heard that before?"
"I might have read your Facebook quotes."
"Riiiiiight."
- Two people who shouldn't be apart

"You aren't allowed to die."
"It'll happen eventually."
"Well yeah, but it'll be peacefully in your sleep at a very old age. I've decided."
"Next to you? Have you decided my whole future for me?"
"I leave that for you to decide..."
- Me and someone who means the world to me...

"Oooooook...You can get off of me now."
"Yeeeep."
"Aaaaannnny time now..."
"Yeeeep."
"Like right now..."
"Yeeeep. I'm movin'. Look at me...speed of light..."
- Alishia and I making fun of a rather awkward situation I was in

"Usually Laelen's all graceful and stuff, but she looked like a freaking elephant on heroin!"
"Well if she were a cartoon she'd be pink...and she's a pretty elephant."
- My friends making fun of the way I climb out of windows

"...I am amazing! Amazing people are not mistaken!" - Kory my best friend!!

"I have a theory: Vests protect you from things. Life vests protect you from drowning. Bullet proof vests protect you from getting shot. Sweater vests protect you from pretty girls!" - Kory

I prefer nightmares to good dreams 'cause when you wake up from a nightmare you're relieved that it wasn't real. When you wake up from a good dream it's one of the worst feelings in the world knowing that it didn't really happen. -Me

"What would you do if you woke up in a bed full of dead midgets?
(stretches and looks around) Willy Wonka is gonna kick my ass!"
- Swiftkaratechop

"Shalopadoo!"
-Swiftkaratechop

"Everyone eats babies these days Laelen! It's an everyday thing!"
(pathetic whimper)
- Ashley and I in my 1st Youtube video

"Damn Monkey Alien Babies!"
- My aunt Tiff and I

"So logically, if she weighs the same as a duck she must be made of wood and is therefore a witch!"
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"I could do with a bit more peril in my life!"
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"We require a shrubbery! Nice, not too big, not too expensive."
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"We are no longer the Knights Who Say Ni. We are now the Knights Who Say IckyIckyIcky(odd noises)!!!"
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"THERE IT IS!!! THE TERRIBLE BEAST!"
"Where? Where is it?!"
"It's there!"
"Where? I don't see it!"
"Right there!"
"Behind the rabbit?"
"It IS the rabbit!"
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

"Ahh, I see you have the Machine That Goes BING! That's my favorite! Very impressive!"
- Monty Python: The Meaning of Life

"It's the Pug of Eternal Stench!"
- My aunt Tiff and I talking about her pug Jimmy when he farted during the movie Labrynth at the part the characters are in the Bog of Eternal Stench

Live without the sunlight
Love without your heartbeat
I, I can live within you
- David Bowie in Labrynth

"I kissed Bella...And she broke her hand...Punching my face..."
- Jacob from Eclipse

"Hope is great...We need caffine." - Mohinder from Heroes

"We dream of change. We dream of hope, fire, love, death, and then it happens. The dream becomes real..." - Mohinder from Heroes

"What do you want Sylar?!
"Breakfast!" - Mohinder and Sylar from Heroes

"Are you gonna eat my brain?"
"Claire...That's disgusting." - Claire and Sylar from Heroes

"You and I have real trust issues doctor." - Sylar talking to Mohinder from Heroes

"Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited, imagination encircles the world." -Einstein

It's not too late, It's never too late - From the song Never Too Late, by Three Days Grace

Don't look over your shoulder
'Cause that's just the ghost of me you're seein' in your dreams
Wait, there's no rhyme or reason
Sometimes there's no meanin' in the visions when you're sleepin' - From the song Ghost of Me, by Daughtry

"I wear the cheese, the cheese does not wear me." - Random Cheese Guy from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"...Well I never liked you anyways! And...and...and...You have stupid hair too!" - Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"Put your back into it! A Watcher scoffs at gravity!" - Giles from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"I have a theory; it could be bunnies!
Bunnies aren't cute like everyone supposes!
They've got them hoppy legs and twitchy little noses!
And what's with all the carrots?!
What do they need such good eyesight for anyways?!
Bunnies! Bunnies! It must be bunnies!!" - Anya from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

"What are you up to Damon?"
"That's for me to know and you to dot dot dot." Stefen and Damon from the Vampire Diaries

"I don't know what I'm gonna do, or what's gonna happen to me, but I do know where I stand, and that's with you..." - Koda (one of my characters from Gifted)

"There's a storm coming baby bro, a big one. We just have to wait for the clouds to break..." - Jared (one of my characters from Gifted)

"Shall we bring to an end, all of these deadly games we play? But how can you take off the mask and dance, when you're at a masquerade?" - Stephen (one of my characters from Masquerade)

"We just performed an exorcism on the car...and it worked!!" - My friend Sammy and I when our friend's car wouldn't start.

"IT'S THE SEAGULL!!" - My friend Sammy and I talking about Cody's older bro Cameron

"How do you spell WORLD, Colt?!"
"W-O-R-L-D?"
"Nope, that's the French spelling!"- Savannah and me, and Colt

You'd think by now I would've learned
When you play with fire you get burned - Part of one of my many poems

"Here's my hunting rifle...and here's my tickle me elmo..."
"Will you be my marry wife?!"
"...And I knew I had to find the perfect shell then...so I reached into the water...and to put it nicely, it was a 'poopy' shell." - Jarrod Jones (this inspirational speaker dude)

"...And guys will talk to me and say, 'Joel, I got my girlfriend pregnant, and I don't know what to do! It was an accident!' How is THAT an accident?! Were you running down the street naked, tripped, and 'oops! There's a girl there!' ??" - Joel Johnson, the speaker at Aquire the Fire

I was hanging out with my best friend Kory and we were at this place where we go swing dancing every Friday. It just happened to be his birthday, and he had brought a cake. I was standing there talking to another friend when he walked up behind me and said, "LAELEN!!"
Me: (Turns around) What?!
Kory: (puts frosting on my nose and laughs)
Me: (glares) Kory I am going to kill you!! Get me a napkin NOW!!
Kory: (stands there laughing)
My wonderful friend Brandy: (hands me a napkin)
Me: (cleans off face) Kory I am going to kill you!
Kory: No you're not! You're going to dance with me!
Me: Nope! You're in trouble!
Kory: (grabs my arm and starts pulling me towards the dance floor) Yes you are!!
Me: (struggles to get away)
Kory: (stuggles to get me to the dance floor and tries to make me dance with him)
Everyone in the room: (watches with amused expressions and much laughter)
Me: (finally plops down on my butt in the middle of the floor and glares at Kory). So then later I was still pretending I was mad at him...Kory: (holds arms out) Give me a hug! Me: No! You're still in trouble! (tries to glare and fails epicly) Kory: (puts one arm around me) Me: I refuse to hug you!! Kory: (puts other arm around me) Me: Voluntarily that is!! Kory: (grabs on of my arms and wraps it around him) Me: (Keeps failing at glaring) Kory: (Wraps my other arm around him and puts both of his arms back around me) Two girls we were hangin with: (laugh and give us 'The Look'. You know, like the 'You Guys SOOO Like Each Other' look) Kory: Now we just go like this! (grabs my leg and starts to wrap it around him) Me: You are ridiculous!!

Something else Kory is fond of doing is suddenly deciding to do this one aerial which includes picking me up and putting me on his shoulder so I have to balance there (OVER 6 AND A HALF FEET IN THE AIR!!) while he spins in circles. When Kory decides to do this it's usually somewhat a surprise to me so there's usually screaming and yelping and squealing involved, and everyone always laughs at us. There's a reason we nicknamed that aerial (which is actually known as 'The Angel') 'Caveman Brings Home Wife'!

So, when Kory and I first became dance partners it was for this dinner theater thing, and we had been trying to perfect this one aerial called the 'Coathanger'. We just called it 'The Epic Failure' because we just couldn't get it right. In that aerial I have to run and jump into his arms, and wrap my leg around his head so that the back of my knee is basically behind his neck. He then does this weird twisty flippy thing with me. (It really isn't as naughty as it sounds. Lolz). So one day I'm talking with these people from a youth group from another town, and Kory comes running up and says very excitedly: I now what we did wrong last night!!
Me: Really?!
Kory: Yeahh!! When your leg was around my head -"
Portland youth group people: (all make horrified/disgusted faces)
Kory and I: (start laughing so hard we can barely explain what he really meant)

Also from when the Portland peeps were here...we would play Apples to Apples like every day. For evey green card Cody would say, "My boooooooodddddy!"
Example: Green card: Magical
Cody: My booooooodddddy
So we're playing and laughing, and someone puts down a green card that says 'Pitiful'.
Me: Cody's boooooooooodddy!!
(Which sadly, isn't true...)
Cody glared at me, everyone else laughed, it was great.
What was even funnier was when Cody actually got the red card that said, 'My body'.

My mom and I were auditioning for this musical and two of my awesome friends Brandy and Cody came to support me.
Cody (who was joking around): ...yeah...bad things happened! I mean...the doc messed up or something and snipped off the wrong thing! And now I can't have kids!
Mom: What?!
Me (between bursts of laughter): Mom (laugh) you really (laugh) don't (laugh) want to (laugh) be around me (laugh) and my friends (laugh) when we're talking! (laugh)

We were in the middle of band last year(I play trumpet), and one of the saxophones (Kody) waz goofin' around and went into the band teacher's (Duke) office, which has a huge window. Duke doesn't notice and tells us 2 pull out a song. We all start playin' and Kody keeps peeking at us from the window...so we all crack up. Do u know how bad a band sounds when all the members are laughin' their brains out? Duke finally sees Kody out of the corner of his eye, rolls his eyes, tells Kody to go sit in his seat. Kody goes and Duke goes 2 his desk 4 a sec
My fellow trumpets and I:Do it again!
Kody: (Goes into Dukes office)
Trumpets:Hehe
Duke:Ok people let's get it 2gether, pull out High Falls Overture.
Class:Ok! hehe
Duke: (starts conducting)
Kody: (keeps popping up, makin' faces, takin' a drum mallet pretending he is gonna smack Duke in da head with it)
Trumpets: (Crack up and play horribly cuz we are laughin')
Duke: (frowns at trumpets) get it 2gether guys!
Codi:Stop laughin'! ur gonna ruin it!
Trumpets: (laugh uncontrollably)
Duke: (Notices Kody's seat is empty. Slaps head, rolls eyes, and goes into office. Looks around office, then under desk where Kody hid) Out! go sit in ur seat!
Kody: Awww...
Duke: (hiding tape behind his back) Go! Sit!
Class:Hehe
Kody: (sits in seat)
Duke: (takes tape out)
Kody: AHHHH!
Duke: (tapes Kody 2 seat)
Kody:AHHH!
Class: (Laughs uncontrollably)
Duke: (goes back 2 front of room 2 conduct)
Kody: (stands up w/ chair taped 2 him and waddles his way over 2 Duke. Trys 2 get past Duke and into office)
Duke: (frowns)
Kody: (Waddles as fast as he can back 2 his spot)
Class: (Laughs uncontrollably for the rest of band)

Ok, the next few stories kinda go together...haha...u get to read about my near death experience!
Ok, I was on this youth group trip. There were about 15 of us on the trip and the conference thing was absolutely amazing. There were some people in my group that I had barely known when we set out for the trip, and by the time we came home we were like a big family. It was amazing. On the last day of the event, anyone who had gone could go to Silverwood theme park. Not all the rides were open, but all of the big ones, like roller coasters and stuff, were. My group stuck together...and we were all like, "Let's go on Tremors!"
Tremors is an awesome roller coaster. So everyone is getting their partners and I was like..."Uh...does anyone NOT have a partner?"
My friend Cody's older bro Cameron: I don't! I guess it's you and me!
Me: Ok
Cameron's cool...and at that point I actually knew him better than I knew Cody, who is closer to my age. So we get in line...and we are almost there...
Cameron: K, we are riding in the very front.
Me: HECK NO!!
Cameron: Why?
Me: Cuz I'm not suicidal!
Cameron: It's not suicide!
Me: Yes it is!
But it is no use arguing with Cameron (or Cody)...he will always win...(sigh) so it's our turn...we get in the very front...
Me: Ok, you are paying for my hospital bills and or counseling after this.
Cameron: Ok...sure.
Me: and don't be creeped out if I start screaming and like, hug you or something.
Cameron: Ok.
So the coaster starts...and although I would never admit this to Cameron, riding in the very front was the best ever. So we are all like, 'woo hoo! that was awesome!' and I was complaining about how I nearly died and stuff...It was great. So we are all standing there and people are deciding where to go next...
Me: Anyone want to go on the Skydiver with me? I've never been on it before.
Cody: Sure, I'll go. I've never been on it either.
The Skydiver looks like a big Ferris wheel with closed cars. The cars spin while the whole thing goes around...It looked really fun. So Cody and I are in line...and he sees that there's a wheel so you can control how much you spin.
Cody: (evil smile) hehe...this is gonna be awesome!
Me: Yeah!
So it's our turn finally...and the dude working the ride helps us into the car...and Cody sees a pen on the ground.
Cody: Ohhh...some sucker lost their pen! Haha.
So the dude closes the door...and there aren't any seat belts...there isn't something in between the 2 people...and it's pretty small...and as soon as the dude lets go our car turns upside down. Well Cody (who is a guy who's 3 or 4 years older than me by the way) slams into me...so I'm squished between him and the metal side of the car. Lovely, that's not awkward at all...
Cody: (grunts while trying to turn us rightside up) Wow.
Me: (helps him) Yeah.
Then the car turns upside down the other way...so I squish Cody.
Me: Well...we know each other now! haha...
Cody: Yeah...Haha.
Cuz we barely knew each other at that point...so it was really kinda embarrassing and funny.
So we keep spinning and squishing each other and stuff...and we're both like screaming and stuff...and then change starts flying out of Cody's pockets.
Cody: (starts grabbing change) Ahhh! My money! (starts putting all the change in his mouth)
Me: Nice...And Cody, if you choke and die, I will NOT save you.
Cody: (mumbles something I can't understand and tries not to die)
Then Cody's pen flies out of his pocket.
Cody: Ahhh! My pen! Noooooo! (sees that it landed on the seat next to him. Grabs it and puts that in his mouth too)
So we both nearly died and we got off of the ride extremely bruised and dizzy, and laughing like we had been friends forever.

...Next week...

We are at youth group...and my freakish friend type person Joe starts chasing me with a rubber band. When Joe hits people with a rubber band it can leave a welt for WEEKS...no joke. So I'm running and screaming...and I run towards our youth directors office.
Cody: (walks out of the office)
Me: (runs behind Cody) Joe! Stop right now! This is my bestest buddy right here, and he will kick your butt! (prays that Cody will play along)
Cody: Yeah, Joe! Back off! Don't mess with my bestest buddy!
Joe: (rolls his eyes, but goes away)
Me: Phew...that was close. Thanks.
Cody: (starts walking away, looks back) You sooo owe me. (smiles and goes through the doors)
Me: (smiles and whispers) Yeah...I know...
And we've been bestest buddies ever since.

Ok, so we were sitting in Pre Alg, and Matt falls asleep. It was almost time to go, so I say, "Somebody wake him up!"
So Lynzi leans over, and just pokes him on the arm. Matt freaks out and was all like, "AHHHHH!", falls out of his desk, and just lays there, sprawled on the floor. Everyone cracks up, and I just yell, "LYNZI!! YOU MURDERER!! HOW COULD YOU KILL MATT!!"
Lynzi was all like, "I didn't mean to! I didn't do anything! I just poked him on the shoulder! Ahhh!"
So then I had to make fun of her for the rest of the day of course.

So my dad is driving in his car, and he loves singing, and he's listening to this really good band so he's like, singing at the top of his lungs. He stops at a stop sign, and his window is cracked open. He looks at the car next to him, and sees them head banging and rocking out, and realizes it's because they were listening to his singing. lol

Copy and Pastes

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I (used to) hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm MORMON, so I MUST have more than one MOTHER.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirt
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI and YURI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I Don't DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.

I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.

My parents/parent was or are into drinking and doing drugs, so I must drink and do drugs too.
I'm not a poser or a goth or a skater or emo or a jock, so I must be a prep.
My favorite color is pink so must be a prep who worships BARBI.
I'm SMART so I MUST not have friends
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST burn in hell
I have a SPEECH impediment and talk FUNNY so I MUST be a retarded person
Copy and Paste this to your profile if you hate labels and stereotypes. Put the ones that apply to you in bold

If you're obsessed with WOLVES copy and paste this!

If you love THREE DAYS GRACE copy and paste this!

If you wish you were Halt's apprentice copy and paste this!

If you wish you were a Ranger like Will copy and paste this!

If you're waiting for your letter from Hogwarts copy and paste this!

If you're on TEAM JAMES copy and paste this!

If you're on TEAM DAMON copy and paste this!

If you're obsessed with VAMPIRES copy and paste this!

If your favorite character from Inkheart was Dustfinger copy and paste this!

If you love hard rock copy and paste this!

If you think bad guys are HOT copy and paste this!

Well...that's all for now...

Kings to You by Brunette Inc reviews
[one shot] Fernand reflects on himself, during the time Dantes is in jail.
Count of Monte Cristo - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 978 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/21/2007 - Complete
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Ghosts of the Past reviews
Raoul knows what Christine is thinking about. He can still hear the music too, even after all these years. He just wishes that he could save his lover from the pain that memories bring...from the ghosts of the past. One-shot. Please R&R.
Phantom of the Opera - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,038 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Published: 11/19/2009 - Complete
White Black Red reviews
This is my 1st fic so please know that it is not my best work. What happened after Dustfinger went with the white women? What went through his mind? What did his friends in the Inkworld think? Set in Dustfinger's point of view.
Inkheart - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 14,331 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 6/5/2009 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Dustfinger