my hubby is no edward
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Joined 12-29-08, id: 1785712, Profile Updated: 01-16-15
Author has written 4 stories for Twilight.

Edited on 08/08/2012: Wow, it's been ages since I've been on here at all. Seriously, at least a year... maybe more. As it goes, my real life became overwhelming and took precedence over my love of writing and fic. But to be perfectly honest, I had grown tired with fic in general and needed a break. I loved all my readers! (Seriously, you guys are the best. I still smile and get emotional/feel so guilty every time someone favorites/alerts/reviews.)

Twilight reminded me of how rewarding reading books can be and how much I missed it. Sooo, primarily, that's where I've been for the better part of my two absent years when I was rushing here or there. Recently I was asked to join The Book Hookup and you can find me there.

As for my fics, I don't want to mislead anyone, but I do miss writing and the itch only gets stronger each day. Maybe I'll pick up my muse somewhere and be able to give all these WIPs the attention and endings they deserve.

All the Kisses,


Alright, changing this shit up! How the hell are ya? I'm Christina, a 25 yr old mom to two boys, ages 5 and 3. They are my only obsession besides fanfiction. Here lately, I'm busier than I'd like to be, which means putting this life (the one I enjoy more) on the backburner. I'm hoping with summer brings more time, and with that, I'll be able to get back to doing something I miss wholeheartedly.

Order of my obsession: Saw Rob on magazine in October (Fuck, he's hot!), read all four books in 5 days (slept little, laundry everywhere, who needs to eat, right?), saw the movie in November (ehhh, okay, but still watch it b/c of Robward & that fucking cuff, Kelmett standing in the back of the damn jeep, and motherfucking Jaxper swinging that bat around, Mmmm!), found Meyer's website in early December (finish Midnight Sun, please!) & the next week (the Holy Grail & cause of my addiction). Hook, line, and sinker. So, here we are! Thanks to this wonderful little world, addicts are not being cured, but fixed daily! Some stories are... dare I say it, better crack than the original! IF you want to know anything else, feel free to PM me!

ME facts:

5ft w/ changing eye color (blue, green, grey, blue-green... basically every color but brown)
a mouth that would put a sailor to shame
Love my BBR ladies, my SOB ladies, & RoaR girls, they are the bestest
Fuck, fuckity, fucks yeah, motherfucker, & In-fucking-credible are some of my most used words (Did I mention I say "fuck" a lot?)

So, now I have my own little nugget in a small corner of the Ficdom. I adore writing Emmett and have plans on writing a Angst/Romance for Edward. Things should be getting interesting.

Follow me on twitter & let me know who you are:

For all things you need to know (update scheduling, teasers, & random asshattery), I know have a blog to keep you up-to-date on the happenings of my stories: http:///

NEWS!!! My entry "Voyeuristic Rendezvous" in the Me & Mr. McCarty Contest won 1st place in public voting! I'm so fucking thrilled; thanks to everyone who voted.

Winner's Banner: http:///2vty7pe.jpg

I do plan to expand on this one-shot for all those that loyally reviewed and begged me to continue. It's because of you that I write in the first place. *hugs & kisses all around* Just give me a minute to construct the outline. I can't wait to experience this new journey with you.

Story's Banner (one I did myself, yeah... ehhh): http:///28lxqh/full

Story's Banner (created by the talented DazzledbyJake, so lovely): http:///_SOiqOnAcuEQ/TM7buLktl2I/AAAAAAAAAEI/OzbnNOKOThY/s1600/Randomphonepics001.JPG

VR on The Writer's Coffee Shop (should it be removed from here): http:///library/viewstory.php?sid=2294

New Story: "Chasing the Light" This will be my first venture into Edward and Bella. This deals with darker themes and dramatic pasts, reader beware.

Story Banner: http:///2je8iv

CtL on The Writer's Coffee Shop (should it be removed from here): http:///library/viewstory.php?sid=3018

Banner for "What's Lust Got to do With It?" made by the extremely talented, DreamySim: http:///2009/12/26/banner-for-fanfic-whats-lust-got-to-do-with-it-by-my-hubby-is-no-edward/

LUST on Twilighted (should my story be removed from here): http:///viewstory.php?sid=7524

LUST on The Writer's Coffee Shop: http:///viewstory.php?sid=92

"What's Lust Got to do With It?" Chapter Outfits

Chapter 1: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15636605

Chapter 2: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15637801

Chapter 3: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15638585

Chapter 4: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15645380

Chapter 5: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15647088

Chapter 6: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15648888

Chapter 7: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15650523

Chapter 8: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15654630

Chapter 9: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15660782

Chapter 10: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15663657

Chapter 11: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15665391

Chapter 12: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=15760562

Chapter 13: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=16119729

Chapter 14: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=17087921

Chapter 15: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=18415723

Chapter 16: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=19591071

Chapter 17: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=20198744

Chapter 18: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=20403061

Chapter 19: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=20717078

Chapter 20: http:///whats_lust_got_to_do/set?id=21497689


(Bella's Wedding Dress: http:///dress.aspx?keywordText=lace&keywordType=any&pageSize=15&page=7&style=A3286# )

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Plan - OUTTAKES by QuantumFizzx reviews
REMOVED. Thank you for your readership. Kept a few chapters up to explain why & share outtakes alter. Obsessed but unnoticed for over a year, she puts a plan in motion to catch the eye of the corner-office. That's her plan. Fate has another plan entirely
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,505 - Reviews: 19633 - Favs: 6,400 - Follows: 4,372 - Updated: 12/20/2019 - Published: 12/12/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
High Anxiety by EdwardsBloodType reviews
Cute, trendy Bella returns home to escape the heartache of her past. She immediately befriends neighbors Jasper and Edward, bonding with them in the treehouse out back. Bella and Edward discover they have more in common than they ever dreamed of. AH A/U
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 111,365 - Reviews: 21580 - Favs: 12,223 - Follows: 8,129 - Updated: 7/1/2016 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Bella, Edward
An Introduction to Swirl and Daisy by m81170 reviews
A first kiss, a first dance, a first curse word shared between best friends. This is the tale of a boring, young geek and the social pariah who thought the world of him. A tale of growing up. A tale of a Non-Romantic Romance.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 212,915 - Reviews: 15149 - Favs: 8,349 - Follows: 7,104 - Updated: 1/4/2015 - Published: 1/4/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Confessions of a Difficult Woman by einfach mich reviews
Leah Clearwater is not the kind of girl that goes for guys like Edward Cullen. In fact, she thinks he's an asshole and Edward's made it clear he hates her too. One drunken night changes everything. AU AH For the Parkaward Contest
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 35 - Words: 237,060 - Reviews: 1064 - Favs: 518 - Follows: 354 - Updated: 11/24/2013 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Leah, Edward
Expectations and Other Moving Pieces by chrometurtle reviews
Everything I had done in my life seemed to lead up to this moment. The moment when I found myself bound inextricably to a man I didn’t love, trapped in a life I didn’t want. And if I left him, I would be entirely alone.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 46 - Words: 227,237 - Reviews: 15268 - Favs: 9,152 - Follows: 9,331 - Updated: 11/11/2013 - Published: 10/13/2009 - Bella, Edward
Tropic of Virgo by reviews
He's a young but jaded musician writing lyrics for his band, and she's a naive, frustrated poet looking to break out of her shell; their words collide online. What happens when they meet in high school, unaware of their literary connection?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 37 - Words: 150,577 - Reviews: 20601 - Favs: 14,435 - Follows: 5,810 - Updated: 9/9/2013 - Published: 3/4/2009 - Complete
Hiding in Plain Sight by limona reviews
Bella is a witness in peril. Emmett Cullen is the deputy assigned to protect her. When the witness protection program isn't safe, Emmett asks Bella to pose as his brother Edward's fiancée until the trial. AU, AH, ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 23 - Words: 141,120 - Reviews: 10911 - Favs: 12,628 - Follows: 13,031 - Updated: 6/14/2012 - Published: 9/14/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Fallout by OCDindeed reviews
March 16/06 the world the Cullens knew ended. Faith, hope & love are powerful things. Edward finds out how powerful they are when he loses the one person who made his life worth living. Not just an E/B story. Entire Cullen clan is here, each with their own hardships. Set during a post-apocalyptic nuclear war. NM/AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 325,290 - Reviews: 6838 - Favs: 4,987 - Follows: 3,393 - Updated: 3/24/2012 - Published: 3/24/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Resident Geek by cdunbar reviews
Geeky Edward thinks he has absolutely no shot with the popular, beautiful Bella. Is he right, or will she be one of the many girls who thinks geeks make for better lovers? M for language, sexuality, and some underage drinking. A little OOC...ok, a lot OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 95,911 - Reviews: 5551 - Favs: 7,425 - Follows: 5,398 - Updated: 12/13/2011 - Published: 8/30/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Vampire in the Basement by michellephants reviews
While hunting one afternoon, the boys stumble upon what appears to be a corpse. When they learn it's a severely broken vampire, they take him home to do what they can to help. But of course, fate has plans for this man. Canon Couples. AU.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 32 - Words: 164,189 - Reviews: 11844 - Favs: 10,472 - Follows: 6,875 - Updated: 10/30/2011 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Work in Progress by araeo reviews
AU/AH: Bella, Edward and the usual suspects are adults living in Seattle. They hit it off after a klutzy accident and E awakens B's ovaries, who never hesitate to voice their pervy opinion in B's head. Rated M for language and lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 43 - Words: 281,655 - Reviews: 6728 - Favs: 6,484 - Follows: 3,728 - Updated: 7/1/2011 - Published: 2/18/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Elemental by TallulahBelle reviews
AU/AH: When the Swans return to their birthplace, Bella learns she is no ordinary teenager, and Forks is no ordinary town. Can she fulfill her destiny with the powerful Edward Cullen, or will the dark forces that threaten their families destroy them all?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 30 - Words: 189,571 - Reviews: 9616 - Favs: 10,300 - Follows: 5,372 - Updated: 2/8/2011 - Published: 7/23/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Seventh Inning Stretch by Live720 reviews
After a drunken one-night-stand, an engaged Bella wakes up to sexy Jacob Black. Reacquainted with him four weeks later at a baseball game, will she be able to resist? AH, OOC, Lemony goodness.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 51,560 - Reviews: 783 - Favs: 656 - Follows: 622 - Updated: 10/11/2010 - Published: 8/27/2009 - Jacob, Bella
The Blessing and the Curse by The Black Arrow reviews
By pretending she is falling for Edward, Bella is fulfilling Esme's dying wish. But sexy, possessive Edward can read her mind. Will she ever get into his? Can Bella forget the pain of her teenage years, and can she resist his relentless seduction? AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 140,448 - Reviews: 14606 - Favs: 17,537 - Follows: 8,938 - Updated: 9/10/2010 - Published: 5/31/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Company Loves Misery by AngstGoddess003 reviews
AH-Edward, current recovering alcoholic, former bully of Bella Swan, must make amends to the one person who refuses to give them. Written for FGB Auction/WA Rehab. Adult Situations. Updated Wed/Sun.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 76,843 - Reviews: 6268 - Favs: 5,549 - Follows: 5,479 - Updated: 7/12/2010 - Published: 12/12/2009 - Edward, Bella
Summer of Salt by lola-pops reviews
The heat wave lingers. Sweet, savory and slick. Jasper, Rose and I wade through the humid days, content in our relative isolation. We spend June through August at our family lake property, and this summer is like any other. Until it's not.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 26 - Words: 88,646 - Reviews: 4746 - Favs: 6,298 - Follows: 2,282 - Updated: 7/5/2010 - Published: 12/18/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
When Darkness Turns to Light by Janna Banana reviews
4 years after Edward left Bella in the forest; Bella is finally moving forward, but it is someone from her past that helps her truly heal and obtain the future she was always meant to have. Bella and Jasper Fanfic.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 52 - Words: 172,600 - Reviews: 3799 - Favs: 4,881 - Follows: 1,773 - Updated: 6/27/2010 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Bella, Jasper - Complete
Corner Coffee Shop by Live720 reviews
After a five year battle for her life, it seems the odds have dealt Bella a different card. With daily trips to a coffee shop, see how her life intertwines with unsuspecting individuals on a journey of self-evaluation and new found love. AH B/E
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 18,514 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 4/6/2010 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Bella, Edward
Dark Side of the Moon by blondie AKA robin reviews
New Moon from Edward's POV. Witness how Edward agonized over leaving Bella, hunted for Victoria, faced the Volturi, and came to realize that with Bella was where he was meant to be.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 176,408 - Reviews: 2610 - Favs: 3,780 - Follows: 1,661 - Updated: 2/26/2010 - Published: 5/23/2008 - Edward - Complete
Well, This Sucks: Life According to Seth by Krum Cake reviews
Peek into the intimate pages of Seth Clearwater's man-journal as he complains about life, love, and teenage shape-shifter angst. Post BD, canon-compliant, rating for language and sex humor...because Seth is a teenage boy.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 53,039 - Reviews: 1130 - Favs: 930 - Follows: 809 - Updated: 12/4/2009 - Published: 9/1/2008 - Seth
Fall For You by Live720 reviews
What if Bella never jumped off the cliff? This story picks up from that part in New Moon. It gives Jacob his chance, finally. If Edward decides to come back, whom will Bella choose? Who is Cole and what are his motives? Read and find out!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 40 - Words: 140,564 - Reviews: 2604 - Favs: 1,267 - Follows: 671 - Updated: 11/16/2009 - Published: 10/29/2008 - Bella, Jacob - Complete
Happy Birthday, Nina! by HappyBirthdayNina reviews
Nina, each chapter has the author who wrote you a piece of work. Happy Birthday - we hope you enjoy. Some are smutty, some are crackfic, some are .. undefinable. All are from our hearts.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 85 - Words: 121,049 - Reviews: 334 - Favs: 183 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 10/25/2009 - Published: 10/11/2009
High Heels and Runaway Frisbees by enamors reviews
Bella shares a very passionate and public kiss with a handsome, bronze haired stranger. Edward/Bella AU/AH one shot.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,102 - Reviews: 5297 - Favs: 4,982 - Follows: 4,131 - Updated: 3/4/2009 - Published: 6/2/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
A World Without Sound by The Romanticidal Edwardian reviews
AU, BxE. My name is Bella Swan; good at sign language and karate. My best friend is deaf, and you know what? It doesn't matter. Won twice at Twilight Awards, and has been nominated more. Please review!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 22 - Words: 105,849 - Reviews: 7829 - Favs: 10,046 - Follows: 2,895 - Updated: 9/27/2008 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Heatwave by Ruby-Wednesday reviews
When an unexpected Heatwave hits Forks, it allows Edward and Bella to leave their problems behind and have some fun! Set between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn. Now Complete!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 109,924 - Reviews: 4885 - Favs: 3,256 - Follows: 1,616 - Updated: 9/27/2008 - Published: 1/4/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Exploratory Dips in the Pool from a Curious Writer reviews
A multitude- 25 to be exact- of intermixed drabbles & one-shots for my entry into the Twilight 25 Challenge, Round #4. There will be a wide range of ratings, pairings,& genres. I'm using this opportunity as a chance to grow and explore.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 152 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/19/2010 - Bella
Chasing the Light reviews
Bella often finds herself seeking out a light source to keep the hidden shadows of her haunting memories at bay. What happens when she finds that glowing warmth wrapped in the arms of someone just as broken as she is? AH/OOC M for lemons, language, etc.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,991 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/24/2010 - Bella, Edward
What's Lust Got to do With It? reviews
While Edward & Rosalie are out of town, will Emmett and Bella be able to contain their infatuation for one another, or will they let the lust consume them? AU/AH, a bit OOC; rated M for a good reason
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 20 - Words: 141,732 - Reviews: 730 - Favs: 478 - Follows: 403 - Updated: 8/1/2010 - Published: 7/21/2009 - Bella, Emmett
Voyeuristic Rendezvous reviews
Bella moved to Forks seeking solace from a life she built in Phoenix. Forcing herself to forget old habits, what happens when a brooding, mysterious Emmett makes her remember all she hoped to escape? AH; OOC *Submission to the Me and Mr. McCarty contest*
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,383 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 40 - Published: 6/9/2010 - Bella, Emmett - Complete
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