Author has written 1 story for Teen Titans.
Save my dragons!
And my Role-playing friend's dragons!
HELLO RANDOM PEOPLE!!
Some info on ME!!
Birthday: April 16
name: Nonya B. Isnis
Favorite song: Either... Birdhouse in Your Soul by They Might Be Giants, I'm Not Your Girl by Lillaine, Gypsy Woman by Hilary Duff, Quicksand by Lillix, OR Disturbia by Rihanna
I LOVE Teen Titans, animals, Death Note, Soul Eater, iCarly, stuff by SecretAgentBob, eating ice cream, eating steak, eating cheesecake, bashing Superman, watching people fail on American Idol, Deviant Art, FanFiction, Israel, and being Jewish!
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, They are going to freeze that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOUR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. my mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"
Random quotes :) :D :) :D
Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver.
Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up.
People say "Guns don't kill people, People kill people!" Well, I think guns help. If you stood there and yelled Bang, I don't think you'd kill too many people.
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
When you get caught looking at him just remember he was looking back.
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake
Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, others just gurgle
If we can put one man on the moon, why can't we put them all there?
If you don't like my driving stay off the sidewalk
There's a light at the end of every tunnel, just pray it's not a train.
Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.
You have a right to your opinions. I just don't want to hear them.
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
The only reason that I talk to myself is because that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
"I did my homework! I just forgot to write it down."
The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears it is true.
We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.
Eat right, exercise, die anyway.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it everytime I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?
If you can keep your head while other people are losing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation.
Don't steal. The government hates the competition.
If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.
Tell the truth and run.
Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts.
Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense.
Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.
If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over.
Maybe this world is another planet's hell.
You're just jealous because the voices in my head talk to me and not you.
I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.
ADHD is Automatic Death by Hyperness Disorder
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.
Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?
Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.
I was going to take over the world, but I got distracted by something sparkly.
WARNING: Children left unattended will be sold to the circus.
Don't hit kids. No, seriously, they have guns now.
Please: Don't throw your cigarette butt's on the floor, the cockroaches are getting cancer.
Life is like a pack of gum... I've yet to figure out why.
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
Before you criticize someone walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you do criticize them you are a mile away and you have their shoes.
If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.
The evening news always starts off by saying Good Evening and then procede to tell you exactly why it isn't.
If everyone jumped off a bridge would you? No I would step onto a pile of bodies.
No you don't get it you think you get it which is different than actually getting it get it?
There are 3 kinds of people, those who make it happen, those who watch it happen and those who don't know what the hell is happening. (I belong in that last catagory)
My imaginary friend thinks you have mental problems.
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me, he said I was being ridiculous, everyone hasn't met me yet.
When life gives you lemons squeeze them in somebody's eyes and RUN!
That is the wrongest wrong that ever wronged.
If you are reading this then step 1 of my EVIL PLAN is complete.
I used up all of my sick days...so I'm calling in dead.
She's my best friend; break her heart and I'll break your face
I agree with the dictionary; girls before guys, partying before studying, friends before love.
Come to the dark side; we have cookies!
Energizer bunny arrested: charged with battery
People who don't know me think I'm quiet. People who know me wish I was.
Last night, I was lying on my bed, staring up at the stars and wondering 'Where the heck is my roof?'
I want to do that thing where you put pins on a map to show where you've been, but first I'll have to visit the places on the corners so the map doesn't fall.
How is it possible to have a civil war?
I'm the kind of person who walks into a door and apologizes.
First law of science: don't spit into the wind
May your life be like toilet paper - long and useful!
theres always a light at the end of a tunnel just pray its not a train!
take my advice i dont use it anyway
Jealousy is a wasted emotion. Which is why I recycle!
What does really suck? A giraffe with pain in his neck
Don't be open-minded, your brains might fall out
Homework? Do I pay school money to work at home!?
wat do you call the end of a shoe-lace? Exactly!
Smile and the world smiles with you. Fart and you stand alone
When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose
Smile, it makes people wonder what you're up too..
There are some that are wise and others that are otherwise
The easiest way to avoid a hangover is to just stay drunk
You'll never get rid of a bad temper by losing it!
Whoever said money can't buy happiness, didn't know where to shop
If at first you do not succeed, destroy all evidence that you ever tried
STUPIDEST THINGS ON PRODUCT LABELS
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Wow, thats so helpful now! -.-)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (omg no way!)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time? ?.?)
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (One would hope.)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to...what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash.)
On artificial bacon: "Real artificial bacon bits". (So we don't get fake fake bacon. Oh no we get real fake bacon.)
On a Myer hairdryer:"Do not use while sleeping."(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."(Wow. That's really helpful)
On a child's superman costume:"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly". (Awh, that's the whole purpose of buying the costume!)
On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions:"Put on fork and eat."(No! Really? We're supposed to eat food?!)
On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how??)
On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's just a suggestion).
On a Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping." ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).
On a bag of Fritos!: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (the shoplifter special)?
On a Korean knife: “Keep out of children” (I should bloody well hope so!)
Boeing 757-"Fragile. Do not drop"(That means you, Hulk! Put that bloody aeroplane down, you might drop it!)
Scoopable cat litter-"safe to use around pets" (Again, I should bloody well hope so!)
Baby oil-"Keep out reach of children." (Good thing babies aren't children, isn't it!)
Hair coloring-"Do not use as an ice cream topping." (Yeh. My grandmother died because she thought my hair dye was ice-cream topping and put it in a sundae)
Komatsu Floodlight-"This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark" (OMG!! That's as amazing as a newsreader reading the news!)
Earplugs-"These earplugs are nontoxic, but they may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe." (Are you sure? Lets experiment.)
RCA television remote control-"Not dishwasher safe." (Did someone do this once...?)
Road sign-"Caution: water on road during rain." (No. Duh. Sherlock)
Max(to me): I beat you to claass I beat you to claass!
Me (in Raven-worthy voice): and I should care why?
Sam(to max): Oh Burn! Do you want some ice for that burn!?
Baraichigo: I wonder where Cyborg buys his clothes?
Me: Does Cy even WEAR clothes?
Both of us: BAD THOUGHT BAAAAAD THOUGHT!!
Teacher: What type of equation is this?
Me: Slope y-intercourse.
Me: What? Was it something I sai- wait... OMG! INTERCEPT I MEANT INTERCEPT!!
Me (during sugar rush): LETS GET MORE FUDGIES (brownies my mom makes that are TOO good)!!
Tori(also in sugar rush): YEAH!!
Both of us (while getting fudgies at midnight): fudge, fudge, fudge, fudge...
My dad(after waking up from the tin lid on fudgies dropping): wa?... what are you doing up this late?!
Me: This is just a dream, an illusion.
Dad: GO TO BED RIGHT NOW!!
Tori: but they're fudgealicious!
Cyborg: Raven, you like waffles don't you?
Raven: more than life itself
Sam It's foreign for good evening.
Carly: In what language?
Baraichigo: You watch WAY too much TV.
Max: but no one should vote for someone who looks like an idiot!
Me: Well that's hypocritical
Me: Did I say that out loud? oops...
Me(about Lenny): He eats anything that doesn't eat him first.
Lenny: No, I eat some of those too.
Me: I LIKE A BANANANANANANANOOOO
Me: A BANANA A BANANA A BANANA PEEL!!
Rest of girl scout troop: o_O
Me: I bet no one knows what my password is!
Josh: Is it 'ugly'?
Me: Why would my password be describing you?
Me: Josh has no self-confidence of his own so he tortures me and feeds off of MY self-esteem like a blood-sucking leech.
Mom: ... That's deep
Me: Yeah, but he's shallow
Me: I don't get it
Me: When Rafiki holds a baby off the edge of Pride Rock, which is probably, like, 90 feet above the rest of the ground, everyone cheers; when Michael Jackson holds his kid off the railing of a balcony, he nearly gets arrested.
Emily: Don't lions have, like, multiple cubs?
Emily: Mufasa only has one cub. What happened to the other?
Me: Weeellllll... Rafiki was probably holding Simba's sibling over the edge to show everyone...
Emily: Yeah, so?
Me: It probably slipped and fell to its doom.
Lucien: (trying to move a chair from between two desks) I can't move this stupid thing!!
Me:just leave it be
Mrs. Clerman: He is waging war with the chai!r
Jared: and the sad thing is, he's losing
Lucien: FINALLY!! I got it!
Lucien: (trips over different chair while walking to desk)
Me: Revenge of the chairs
Mrs. Rachavitski (to Jared): You tickle a boy?
Rachel: Yeah, I had a girl pregnant in my school
Niki: You got a girl pregnant!!
Me:... wow Niki, just wow.
At horse camp..
Ellen: Did you see that! Norman just nuzzled Rambo!
Niki: It's okay Norman. We understand. You're just sexually confused.
Norman: (looks down as though embarrassed)
Me: Stop it! He's embarrassed enough that we saw him, and now you're just rubbing it in his face.
Makayla: NORMAN IS A HORSE, PEOPLE! HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND A WORD WE'RE SAYING!
Me:...And to think you love horses.
Me: So, you like writing songs? How do you come up with lyrics?
Counselor: Well, music is like a fart. If you push too hard, all you get is poop.
Me: Well that's. . . disturbing
Ariel: Yeah, and some people text LOLS, but how can laughing out loud be plural?
Me: Hahaha... hahaha! Hahahahaha! HAHAHAAAAAHAHA! ...ha.
Ariel: What was that?
Me: THAT is how you LOLS
Aunt Kathy: Bradley, guests get to do whatever they want... except burn the house down.
Me: No make house go boom? 8(
Bradley: It's okay, she's running an errand soon, and there are matches in the garage.
Kathy: ((insert my real name here))! Bradley!
Me: It's okay, I was just kidding.
Bradley: I wasn't...
Elana: Don't touch my hair!! (she pretends to be a priss by saying that, but she's really a nice person)
Lucien: I see puffy clouds.
Me: do you see anything else?
Lucien: I see a rainbow colored unicorn. It says it wants to kill Elana.
Elana: Great! First you say a muffin will kill me, now a unicorn, too?
Jared: Don't worry, I ate the evil muffin.
Lucien: Last night the unicorn took my clothes. Will someone ask him to give them back?
Me: ...you guys are the reason I need a therapist.
Josh: If my big brother was here, he would be dancing on the table with a bottle of booze in his hand.
Jonny: That was... random, Josh. Very random.
Jared: Why does everyone make a big deal about Michael Jackson's death?! He was a complete pedophile!!
Lucien: ... I thought he was a gay pervert.
Me: Michael Jackson was neither pervert nor pedophile!! Underneath all that plastic surgery, he was a good man!!
in social studies...
Lucien: Elana! That's a bad luck charm!!
Elana (holding pencil): Sure it is. If it was, I'd be, like, dead.
Lucien: No, you're gonna die in 7 days!
Elana: Why? Is the unicorn gonna kill me? At least I don't have to worry about the evil muffin.
Jared: Only because I ate it! It was banana nut! I hate banana nut! I ate to keep it from murdering you! I deserve some appreciation!!
Me: ...we need serious psychological help.
-door randomly opens then slams shut-
Josh: IT'S THE GHOST OF THE PAPER AIRPLANE!! RUN FOR YOUR WORTHLESS LIVES!!
Lucien: Actually, Josh, it's the unicorn.
Elana: It's gonna touch my hair then kill me!! AHHHH!!
LoonyLoopymischiefDreamer (about Beast boy): Then, he turned into an elephant and SQUASHED 'EM LIKE THE LITTLE BUGS THEY ARE!!
Me: You know what's pathetic? The Teen Titans can defeat a giant demon who is the reincarnation of evil, yet they can't beat a middle aged man with only one eye.
Me: I KNOW HOW THE TITANS CAN BEAT SLADE! If they run over him with the T-car, he would just be like SPLAT!
LoonyLoopyMischiefDreamer: That might actually work.
Me (trying to make Baraichigo yawn): Yawn
Twizzler (a friend of mine): Sooo... who do ya think is better? Batman or Superman?
Julia: I like Green Lantern. He can do anything!
Ella: Yeah, but only because of some ring.
Me: What if it came off and fell into a sewer? Oh! And it got stuck on a sewer rat's tail! (in high yet creepy voice) SEWER RATS WOULD RULE THE WORLD!!
Jessi: They should make a comic of that. He hears that a mutant rat carrying a bazooka is robbing the bank. He would try to use his powers, look at his hands and be, like, 'F#@+.'
Jessi: It's all fun... that is, until you run over a hippie-mobile. (we were trying to get somewhere as fast as we could and we were timing it, but got stuck behind a slow van with a big blue peace sign on it.)
Me: If G-d is neither male nor female, then does that mean G-d is a hermaphrodite?
Mrs. Tooling (Jewish studies teacher): We need to remember that, supposedly, G-d has no true, physical body. I G-d did, G-d could be anything. G-d could be a human, a tree, a walrus, a unicorn-
Me and Elana: A unicorn?
Mrs. Tooling: Yeah, sure. Like I said, anything.
Lucien: G-d is gonna get you...
Elana: BUT UNICORNS WANNA KILL ME!! G-D CAN EASILY KILL ME!
Mrs. Tooling: ...Am I missing something here?
Jared: So, Jonny, you have back pain from your weak bones, right?
Jared: Does that make you feel old?
Jonny: No. It makes me feel in pain!
"I am not Toph, I am Melon Lord!" Toph from Avatar:the Last Airbender
"I'm so gangsta, I carry a squirtgun."-unknown
"Splee!" Waffle from Catscratch
"You are one crazed up Froot Loop." Danny from Danny Phantom
"Hello Clarice, when did you get here?" Cosmo from Fairly Odd Parents
"AAPA ATE MOMO!!" Sokka from Avatar: the last Airbender
"It's a giant mushroom... MAYBE IT'S FRIENDLY!! Friendly mushroom! Mushy giant friend." Sokka from Avatar: The Last Airbender
(at book signing with Erin Hunter)
Bookstore owner: Five more minutes before you have to leave.
Erin Hunter: Okay.
Bookstore owner: -leaves area-
Erin Hunter: They can't make me leave! Never!
(Also at book signing)
Fan: Do you have a boyfriend or husband? Does he ever help you write?
Erin: I'm engaged, actually. My fiance read my books and asked me, 'There's a lot of romance drama in your books. You're not going to push me off a cliff just to make this more interesting, are you?'"
Erin: No, he really asked that.
(still at signing)
Me: How do you come up with the words that the Clan cats use, like twolegs?
Erin: THAT is one of my favorite parts. I imagine what things would look like through the mind of a cat, not knowing what things are or why they do what they do.
(She answered MY question!!)
Me: Why is it that all of the inappropriate songs have the best tunes and beats?
Loonyloopymischiefdreamer((Loony)): So that they attract people. . . oh wow. I did NOT mean for that to sound like that.
Me: Attract. . . inappropriate. . . ohhhhhhh.
Loony: Add this to quotes.
Me: I'm on it. This was too big of a fail NOT to add it.
((Freddy the Fish program practice. A thing to preform for little kids to teach about keeping water clean. We use a sponge in the shape of a fish as Freddy))
Jared: Wouldn't Freddy be dead by now?
Mrs. Bass: NO! We'll be doing this for little kids. NO DEATH!
Josh: He's a superhuman fish! HE'S BATMAN!
Me: Actually, Batman doesn't ha-
Sam: HE WAS BITTEN BY A RADIOACTIVE SPIDER! HE'S SPIDERMAN!
Me: . . . He's a sponge.
Elana: HE'S SPONGEBOB!!
Everyone else:. . . . . . .
Camp counselor: Oreos are a vegan's main dessert.
Me: (thinking she said cheetohs) But I thought they're made with real cheese!!!!!!!
Chris: Tazz, how much do you care about your bag?
Tazz: . . . .alot?
Chris: May I step on it?
Tazz: sure. . . ?
Me: Chris, how big 's the spider?
Chris: (innocently) what spider?
Me: How. Big. Is. The. Spid-er.
Chris: You don't want to know.
Cassie: Yes I do!
Chris: No you don't.
Cassie: Yes I do! (looks over to see spider) (jumps out of tent) I DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW!! I DIDN'T WANNA KNOW!!
Me: (looks at huge wolf spider) That's a HONKER!
((A group had to do a presentation on Theology... this is how it went))
Jake: I am the Pope. I rule this land!
Mary: Why do you get to be Pope?
Jake: Because I hear God talk to me!
Eric: We shall take over the throne! Haha! Ha! Hahaha!
Jake: God! What should I do?!
Collier (standing on chair as God): Exterminate! -throws paper wad at Eric-
Eric: Ahhhh! -hit in head with wad-
Collier-God: Head shot. Fo-shizzle!
Me: -laughing too hard to breath-
(After failing REALLY hard Math test)
Elizabeth: Don't worry. It's not the end of the world!
Me: -sobbing- YES IT IIIIIS!!!
James and Evan: ((-look at each other. And, singing in perfect harmony-)) It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel just fiiiiine!