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Joined 01-16-09, id: 1806038, Profile Updated: 05-02-10

Hey yall its Digger. I love TWILIGHT! and thanks to the authers : Orianna de la Rose,I want a cookie NOW and Alli Edward Cullen! they write ausome story's. And plus those are just some of the greatest authors out there :)

P.S. I'm just writting this because im REALLLLY board..

Hi oriana!

My BFFFFFFFF is Oriana de la Rose

any thing else you want to know about me, send a message! ;)


My list of favorite tilight characters (in no prticular order) I got this idea from Sophia 24

1. Edward - Well because hes sexy for one and hes not Jacob. (Sorry for all of you team Jacob's. No offence) He also save Bella from James and Victoria and her vampire army and plus, you would have to be CRAZY not to love Edward.

2. Jasper - Who doesnt love a man who was in war? yummmm. He tottaly cares about your feelings and he understands so much and hes a person who you dont have to worry about arguing with to much.

3. Bella - She has everything I wish I had. She lives in a wonderfull town, she has a boy friend, o and hes a vampire! I wish I was Bella sooo much.

4. Emmett - Hes so damn funny! I wish I had a big brother like him... Plus hes really cute. Hes there whenever you need him to stick up for you and whenever you wanna play a prank on some one or wanna do something crazy, hes the guy for you.

5. Alice - Shes just like a best friend should be. Always there to make you laugh or if you need cheering up, and she never judges you. Shes even there to take you shopping. You would have to be crazy to not want a friend like her. I know I do.

Something about me:

My favourite colors: Navy Blue, Red, Black and Green

My favourite animal: Bear

My favourite movie: Twilight

My favourite books: Twilight saga

My favourite bands: Linkin Park, Muse, Mutemath, Green Day, Paramore, Nickle Back, 3OH!3, etc...

“We say we love flowers...
Yet we pluck them.
We say we love trees...
Yet we cut them down.
And people still wonder why
some are afraid...
When told they are loved.”


reading numerous fanfictions,

copy and paste this onto your profile.

the bold ones r mi fav!

If you've met your not-blood related twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever stayed up for over 40 hours continuously just because you frickin' could, copy this into your profile.

98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

My best friend is insane, if you think your best friend is insane, put this in your profile.

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile.

If there are times when you just wanna annoy people for the heck of it then copy this into ya profile.

Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proude of it, put this in your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, put it in your profile..

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile. Lets start a list of the words: who, how, why, etc...

If you think the semi-colon is completely usless, stupid, annoying and plotting to destroy the English language as we know it, put this in your pro!

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur pro!

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile..

A friend helps you up when you fall a best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"

A friend wipes your tears when your rejected a best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?"

A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, THAT WAS AWESOME , LETS DO IT AGAIN!!..

If yoo cant spel too sav yoor lyfe then putt thes in yoor profiele

If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've met your not-blood related twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile..

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional charater Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

Love is Like Pi -- Natural, IrratiOnal, and Very, vEry Important

On average, coffee drinkers have sex more frequently than non-coffee drinkers.

A sneeze is 1/8 of an orgasm.

If you truly believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen), copy this into your profile.

A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME, LET'S DO IT AGAIN!"

They say guns don't kill people, people kill people. Well, I'm pretty sure the guns help because if you stood there and shouted 'BANG' I don't think you'd kill a lot of people.

Shakespeare invented the word "assassination" and "bump."

Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left handed people do.

You know that you are more likely to be killed by a champagne cork than by a poisonous spider.

TYPEWRITER, is the longest word that can be made using the letters on only one row of the keyboard.

25 Reasons to Thank my Mother:

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why.

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favourite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you

are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

This is true!

My name is Sarah

I am but three,

My eyes are swollen.

I cannot see,

I must be stupid,

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My parents so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long.

When I'm awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My parents aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the far wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

with unimaginable hate

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor

My name is Sarah

I am but three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

If you are against child abuse put this poem on your profile!

Daddy's Poem:

Her hair was up in a ponytail, her favorite dress tied with a bow,

Today was Daddy's Day at school and she couldn't wait to go.

But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home,

Why the kids not might understand, if she went to school alone.

But she was not afraid, she knew just what to say,

What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today.

But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone,

And that was why, once again, she tried to keep her daughter home.

But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all,

About a dad she never sees, a dad who never calls.

There were daddy's along the wall in back for everyone to meet.

Children squirming impatiently, Anxious in their seats.

One by one the teacher called, a student from the class,

To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed.

At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare,

Each of them was searching, a man who wasn't their.

"Where's her daddy at?"

She heard a boy call out. "She probably doesn't have one." another student dared to shout.

And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say,

"Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day."

The words did not offend her, as she smiled up at her mom,

And looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on.

And with hands behind her back, she slowly began to speak,

And out of the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique.

"My daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away,

But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day.

And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know,

All about my daddy, and how he loves me so.

He loved to tell me stories, he taught me to ride my bike,

He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite.

We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone,

And though you cannot see him, I'm not standing here alone.

'Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart,

I know because he told me he'll forever be in my heart."with that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest,

Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress.

And somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears,

Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years.

For she stood up for the love, of a man not in her life,

Doing what was best for her, doing what was right.

And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd,

She finished with a voice so soft, but it's message clear and loud.

"I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star,

And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far.

You see he is a Marine, and died just this past year,

When a roadside bomb hit his convoy, and taught Canadians to fear.

But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away,"

And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day.

And to her mother's amazement, she witnessed with surprise,

A room full of daddy's and children, all starting to close their eyes.

Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside,

Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him by her side.

"I know your with my daddy,"to the silence she called out,

And what happened next, made believers out of those once filled with doubt.

Not one of them could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed,

But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant, long-stemmed, pink rose.

And a child was blessed for only a moment, by the love of her shining star,

And given the gift of believing that heaven is never to far.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them,a day to love them, but then an entire lifetime to forget them.

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club (that is the best part of dating is cuddling!)

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.


Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Choose--me or your life.
Boy: My life

-The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...-

"The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life."

Lessons Learned in Twilight:

1. You can enjoy the banquet while resisting the wine.
2. The future is not set in stone.
3. Men are crabby when they're hungry.
4. Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear.
5. True love knows no boundaries.
6. Some people are just danger magnets.
7. Even eternal enemies can work together to save something they love.
8. Forget the fangs - real vampires sparkle!
9. Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10. Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes.
11. Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day.
12. Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13. Family is about more than just blood.
14. What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15. Losing your temper can be hair-raising.
16. "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17. Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18. There are exceptions to every rule.
19. Always verify bad news before doing something stupid.
20. Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21. Love means being willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's.
22. Cold hands = Warm heart.
23. Not breathing is uncomfortable.
24. Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair.
25. Romeo was an idiot.
26. Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27. Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28. Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29. Space heaters can be very annoying.
30. Love can make even the most miserable places paradise.

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You Since 1901

Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You Since 1916

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You Since 1916

Alice Cullen: Quirkier Than You Since 1901

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies Since 1843

Bella Swan: Danger Magnet since 1987

You know you're obsessed with Twilight when...

1) You have read Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse at least 3 times. 10 for me
2) You own all above mentioned books.
3) You know that most of your friends will try to bag on Twilight the Movie, but then you'll get defensive and start yelling at them for saying that all the actors/actresses are all wrong and that they will ruin the movie when the actors/actresses don't match their exact mental picture of said character. (LISTEN PEOPLE!! No one will look exactly like your mental image of the Twilight characters, so get over it and quit bagging on the actors/actresses who will do a great job on this movie whether you think so or not!! Please excuse my rant but it needed to be said)
4) You have read everything on every page of Stephanie Meyers web site.
5) You have reread a lot of these pages.
6)You read fanfiction about Twilight.
7)You write fanfiction about Twilight.
8)At one point or another, you have had a screenname/username that says something about Twilight or its characters.
9) You constantly count the days until Breaking Dawn comes out.
10)For a long while after you read Twilight/New Moon/Ecilpse, you acted as a missionary for the books, asking everyone you talked to if the had read them.
11) If said people have not read Twilight, you insist that they read it, because it is, and I quote, "the best book ever".
12) If anyone says something that goes against the statement that Twilight is the best book on the planet, you immediately start to argue with them.
13) You stand firm by your belief that anyone who says that Twilight is just a crappy, unrealistic love story(and yes, believe it or not, I do know someone who has said this!) should be taken to the edge of a cliff and pushed off.
14) For months after you read it, Twilight was your favorite subject to talk about.
15) When you found out you would have to wait until August of 2008 for Breaking Dawn to come out, you almost cried.
16) You argue with your friends over which member of the Cullen family you like best. (I'm debating between Edward and Jasper. Edward is slightly in the lead though ;D)
17)You began reading fanfiction as a desperate attempt to read something about Twilight, when you had already finished the books.
18) No matter how many times you read Twilight or Twilight-related stories, you never get tired of it.
19) As you read this list, you are smiling and nodding at almost every thing you read.
20) Even though you know it's impossible, you often wish that you were a vampire.
21) Vampires are officially your favorite mythical creature ever.
22) Your personal motto is, vampires are cool, not scary.
23) You know that you are not crazy for being obsessed with Twilight; people who don't understand it just haven't read the book.
24) When you hear that someone read Twilight and didn't like it or thought it was stupid, you just shake your head and sigh.
26) You literally haunt Stephenie Meyer's website waiting for new information
27) You're driving your parents mad with your crazy countdowns and the fact that you won't sop trying to explain to them why Twilight is the best book in the world
28) You're keeping track of all the "Breaking Dawn Quotes of the Day" and trying to figure out what they all mean
29) Your home page is Stephenie Meyer's website
30) Your desktop has something to do with the Twilight Series
31) Your screen saver says something about the Twilight Saga
32) You have both the original New Moon book and the New Moon Special Edition
33) You put your Eclipse poster in plain view so that everyone can see it
34) You can't believe that most people haven't read the books
35) You know all the characters so well that you feel as if you could write your own stories about them
36) You spend most of your day making up "What if...?" questions about all the different plot lines
37) You've actually read the play "Romeo & Juliet" just so you could find out how Jacob would die
38) You know you're addicted, but you don't care
39)You can't help saying, "I can't wait for August 2nd!" while everyone who isn't "in the know" stares at you like you're psyco
40) You're more excited about the release of Breaking Dawn than anything to do with Harry Potter
41)When you found out that you would have to wait to see the Breaking Dawn cover art and first chapter until you got back from a trip where you couldn't even get near a book store when both items came out the day ater you left, you have a mental breakdown
42) When you found out about Midnight Sun you had yet another mental breakdown
43) You noticed there is no number 25

I have OCD: Obsessive Cullen Disorder.
Edward Cullen killed Bambi's mom.
I like my men cold, dead, and sparkling.
Twilight, Twilight Twilight, Twilight, Twilight, Twilight. What obsession

WIWAVS: Wishing I A Vampire Syndrome.

If you went to sleep at around 2 am or later reading the Twilight books, copy and paste this onto your profile. Done it :p

If you think that Emmett absolutely ROCKS, copy and paste this onto your proflie. Soooo awsome

If you spend multiple hours each day reading and/or writing, copy and paste this onto your profile. Ah Yeah!

Chocolate chip cookies are yummy! If you agree, copy and paste this onto your profile. who doesn't love cookies??

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and paste this onto your profile. God yeah

If you cried, screamed, or threw a fit when Edward left Bella in New Moon, copy and paste this onto your profile. I actually cried. . .all 4 times!

If you think that the Twilight books are the best books known to woman and man, copy and paste this onto your profile. I SO THINK THAT

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile. IT'S THE BEST THING!

If you are addicted to FanFiction, copy and paste this onto your profile. I'm more than addicted

If you have ever yelled at your television because a character or someone you don't like was on copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

-If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile.

-If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

-If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

-If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

-There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

-I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

-If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much, and then people stare at you, copy and paste this into your profile

-If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

-If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

-If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.

-The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

-If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

-If you compare people to Edward and Bella, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!


1. he makes an effort to know what you are feeling if he can't read your mind
2. he's too faithful to go to a strip club
3. he doesn't kill people anymore
4. he always tries to make the best decisions for the good of people he cares about
5. he sparkles
6. he or Bella wasn't blonde and they had a kid so who needs to be blonde
7. he does his best to be moral and logical
8. he fought down his family to save Bella
9. he ignores Rosalie's mean thoughts and Emmett's inappropriate ones
10. he's a vampire!

I am not afraid of the dark,

I am afraid of what is lurking in it.

I am not afraid of heights,

I am afraid of falling.

I am not afraid of falling in love,

I am afraid of not being loved back.

Find a guy whos calls you beautiful instead of hot,

Who calls you back when you hang up on him,

Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,

Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,

Who holds your hand in public and in front of his friends and family.

Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you.

If you think that describes Edward Cullen, copy it into your profile.

"Wal-Mart, do they like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger, Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die"- Mel Brooks

"Chemistry is a class you take in high school or college, where you figure out two plus two is 10, or something."
- Dennis Rodman, NBA Basketball player, on Chicago Bull's team chemistry being overrated.

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.

Best friends are the people that know all about and still put up with you!

Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days"

A good friend bails you out of jail. A great friend is sitting there next to you saying 'Man, that was fun!' (or) 'we screwed up didn't we?'

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you, but i best friend will go up to him and say "it's because your gay, isn't it?"

A good friend helps you up when you fall, but a best friend laughs, and trips you again.

A good friend helps you move, a best friend helps you move bodies.

Good Friends- will be there to take your drink away when they think you've had to much. but a

Best Friend- will look at you trippin over your own two feet and say "drink the rest of that. you know we don't waste that kinda shit"

She's the kind of best friend that, if my house was on fire, she'd be makeing smores and hitting on the firemen.

Friends are gods way of apologizing for family.

She's my best friend - brake her heart, and I'll brake your face :)

A girl only need 3 things: love to make her weak, alcohol to make her strong, and friends to help her up when the first 2 make her hit the ground.

We're not sarcastic-we're hilarious

We're not annoying-we're just cooler than you

We're not bitches-we just don't like you

We're not obsessed-we're just best friends

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Life was so simple when boys had cooties.

All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.

Huh, it figures. All the good guys are taken, vampires, or both.

No, I don't have PMS. I just really hate you.

Let me know if anything I say offends you, I might wanna offend you later.

Your mom looks like Voldemort (ooooh burn)

It's ok to be ugly, just ask your mom.

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Ask Harry if his scar senses are tingling.

When I am at Hogwarts I will not: Sing "I'm Off to See the Wizard" when sent to the Headmasters office.

I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

I'll be rich and famous when I invent something that will stab people over the internet.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

Don’t mess with me. I've got a stick

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

One Day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject. (love this one!)

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Let's flip a coin-heads we'll be together, tails we flip again.

My mind works like lightning, one brilliant flash and it's gone.

People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.

Tell the truth and run.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

I put the FUN in DisFUNctional :)

It's all fun and games until someone get hurt...then its hilarious.

I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard.

I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

I dream of a better tomorrow--when chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

My imaginary friend thinks you have seriouse problems...

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get me!

I dont have a short attention span, i just...oh look, a kitty!

I live in my own little world, but it's ok, everyone knows me here :)

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again.

I run with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

Never go to bed angry, stay up and plot your revenge.

My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
'Hold my purse.'

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

An apple away keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit. (Carlisle!!)

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

Parents spend the first part of our lives telling us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic...

Whose cruel idea was it for the words 'lisp' to have an 's' in it?

Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?

Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler? (ha! love this one)

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?

Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

Has anyone else ever wondered how Alcoholics Anonymous stays Anonymous?

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?

Why do people say, "You can't have your cake and eat it too"? Why would someone get cake if they can't eat it?

They All Made Me laugh, if some made you laugh, add it too your profile!

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Repost this if you truly believe in God

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism


FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap!

DON'T STEROTYPE PEOPLE!! Copy and paste to ur profile, and bold what U r!!

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
.I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I’m STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm MORMON so I MUST have seven wives.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border. (Anyone who asks someone if they have a green card, I'll smack u! That's just rude!!)
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.

I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I HANG OUT with teenage DRINKERS AND SMOKERS, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be a controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE. (and so what if I am?!)
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber- sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.

I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems.

I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude. (Morals and dignity, poeple. I'm not saying that people who aren't virgins are bad, I'm just saying I follow MY morals.)
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. (No, actually. I'm a little gullible, but not naive.)
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. (I know when to not say something, though I've had a few slip ups.)
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish.
I'm a GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress.
I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kiss someone's ass.
I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian.
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant.
I'm FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual.
I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict.
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian.
I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug-addicted hippie
I'm INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs.
I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life.
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up.
I have GREEN SKIN, so I MUST be a wicked witch.
I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention.
I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean.
I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz
I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all. (No! EWWW!! A lot are like my BROTHERS!!)
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare.
I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore with a jock boyfriend.
I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy.
I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head.
I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports.
I like CATS, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time.
I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi.( we had to learn it in school)
I'm IN BAND, so I MUST be a geek.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious. (Not without a reason!)
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. (Normal is overrated.)
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.
I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay
I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm ALWAYS SMILING AND LAUGHING, so I MUST have a great life.(Looks could be deceiving I may be smiling outside but inside is dufferent...)
I'm a TEEN GIRL who likes to HAVE GOOD NATURED FUN with my FRIENDS, so I MUST be a WHORE, SLUT, and a LESBIAN. (Who never heard of girl time?)
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too.
I like to READ, so I MUST be a nerd.
I FROWN a lot, so I MUST be a nerd
. (It hurts my face to smile too much! pus, it takes 42 muscles to smile)
I get BAD GRADES, so I MUST be a slacker who doesn't try.
I'm a JEW, so I MUST hate all Germans.
I'm a HANNAH MONTANA FAN, so I MUST be childish and immature.
I'm POLITE to TEACHERS, so I MUST be a teacher's pet.(FYI... Haven't you heard of RESPECT!)
I'm a TEENAGER who still likes the DISNEY CHANNEL, so I MUST be immature and childish.

Calling me FAKE won't make you REAL,

Calling me STUPID won't make you SMART,

Calling me WEAK won't make you STRONG,

Calling me UGLY won't make you PRETTY,

Calling me POOR won't make you RICH,

Calling me FAT wont make you PERFECT,

Calling me UNCOOL wont make you COOL,

So why bother?


xYou love hoodies.
xYou love jeans.
x Dogs are better than cats.
x It's hilarious when people get hurt.
XYou've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
xPlayed with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
xAt some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
xYou own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
xYou used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
xyou watch sports on TV.
xgory movies are cool
xYou go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
xYou like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
xBaggy pants are cool to wear.
xIt's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
x Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
x You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
xSports are fun
xTalk with food in your mouth.
(sometimes) xSleep with your socks on at night

Total 21 ... thats kool


xYou wear/Wore lip gloss/stick.
xYou love to shop.
xYou wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink
Go to your mom for advice.
X!!You consider cheerleading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black.
xYou like hanging out at the mall.
xYou like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
xYou like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
xShopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
xYou don't like the movie Star Wars.
xYou were in gymnastics/dance?
xIt takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.

You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
xYou love the movies.
xUsed to play with dolls as little kid.
xLike putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
Like being the star of every thing

total: 14 thats kool well i hate shopping so must go for a big part

x Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking.
x Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking.
x You have ran into a glass/screen door.
x You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
x You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.
So far: 5

xYou have ran into a tree.
xIt IS possible to lick your elbow
x You just tried to lick your elbow.
x You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm.
xYou just tried to sing them

So far:10

xYou have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
x You have choked on your own spit.
xYou have seen the Matrix and still don't get it.
Your hair is blonde.
xPeople have called you slow

So far: 14

xYou have accidentally caught something on fire
xYou tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes.
xYou have caught yourself drooling.
xYou've fallen asleep in class (In grade 3 when I hade to get up early to take my mom and her bf to the airport cause they were going on a trip!!)
If someone says "fart" you laugh

So far: 18

x Sometimes you just stop thinking.
x You are telling a story and forget what you were talking about
x People often shake their heads and walk away from you
xYou are often told to use your "inside voice".
xYou use your fingers to do simple math.
So far: 23

xYou have eaten a bug.
xYou are taking this test when you should be doing something important
x You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize it
x You've looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket (i hate it when that happens!)

So far: 27

x You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don't even when you know it won't happen to you
xYou break a lot of things.
So far: 29

xYour friends/family know not to use big words around you
x You sometimes tilt your head when you're confused
x You have fallen out of your chair before

So far: 32

xWhen you're laying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling
xThe word "uhhhh" is used many times a day.

So far: 34 wow i must be stupid LOL!! :p

Johnny brought a gun to school,
He told his friends that it was cool,
And when he pulled the trigger back,
It shot with a great crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did
What I was told,
I went to school, I got straight As',
I even got the gold!

But Mommy, when I went to school that day,
I never said goodbye,
I'm sorry Mommy, I had to go,
But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun,
He hit me and another,
And all because Johnny,
Got the gun from his older brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy;
That I love him very much,
And please tell Chris; my boyfriend;
That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister;
That she is the only now,
And tell my dear sweet Grandmother;
I'll be waiting for her now,

And tell my wonderful friends;
That they always were the best,
Mommy, I'm not the first,
I'm no better then the rest.

Mommy, tell my teachers;
I won't show up for class,
And never to forget this,
And please don't let this pass.

Mommy, why'd it have to be me?
No one deserves this,
Mommy, warn the others,
Mommy, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy, tell the doctors;
I know they really did try,
I think I even saw a doctor,
Trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying,
With a bullet in my chest,
But Mommy, please remember,
I'm in heaven with the rest.

Mommy, I ran as fast as I could,
When I heard that crack,
Mommy, listen to me if you would,
I'm not coming back.

I wanted to go to college,
I wanted to try things that were new,
I guess I'm not going with Daddy;
On that trip to the new zoo.

I wanted to get married,
I wanted to have a kid,
I wanted to be an actress,
Mommy, I wanted to live.

But Mommy, I'm must go now,
The time is getting late,
Mommy tell my boyfriend,
I'm sorry, but I had to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have,
I know; you know it's true,
And Mommy all I wanted to say is,
"Mommy, I love you"

--In Memory Of The School Shootings--
If this poem touched you in any way, please pass it
on. And even if it didn't, pass it on just for the
memory of the innocent children

You know you live in 2009 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screen name or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Funny isn't it!


Color: Black
Number: 7
Band: Nickle Back
Music Genre: Depends
TV Show: House, Americas got talent, Big brother etc...
Movie: Twilight series, Little ashes and the note book
Actor: Jack Nicholson, Robert Pattinson, Peter Facinelli, Jackson Rathbone, Kellan Lutz, Robert Downing Jr.
Actress: Kristen Stewart, Ashley Greene, Nikki Reed, Rachelle Lefevre
Kind of Movie: Romance, Horror, Comedy

Cartoon: um...
Sport: Soccer
Fast Food Restaurant: Wendys, A&W, Mc D's
Food: Steak
Ice Cream: Roasted Marshmellow
Cereal: um...
Candy: Anything really
Drink: Root Bear, Cherry slushies
Alcoholic Beverage: ...
Quote: "Shit fire and save matches" -unknown

--Do You--

Have any siblings: 1 (step sis)
Have any pets: 4
Have a job: ...
Have a cellphone: Yes
Have any special talents or skills: um.. I can play piano...
Have any fears: Spiders, dark, death
Have a bedtime: No
Sing in the shower: No
Want to go to college: ...
Get along with your parents: Sometimes
Have any piercings: Ears
Have any tattoos: No
Swear: Yes
Smoke: No
Drink: Sometimes...
Do Drugs: No

--Love & All That Crap--

Ever been in love: Yes
Ever cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend: No
Are you single: Yes
Are you in a relationship: No
Do you have a crush on someone: Yes
Ever been dumped: Yes
Ever dumped someone: Yes

--This or That--

Fruit or Vegetable: Fruit
Black or White: Black
Lights On or Lights Off: Lights OFF! I hate lights!

Car or Truck: Truck
Cash or Check: Cash
Rock or Rap: Depends on the song
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
French Toast or French Fries: French Fries
Strawberries or Blueberries: Strawberries
Cookies or Muffins: Cookies
Winter Break or Spring Break: Winter Break
Hugs or Kisses: Kisses

--Have You Ever--

Danced in a public place: Yes... it was embarrassing
Smiled for no reason: Yes
Laughed so hard you cried: Yes

Talked to someone you don't know: Yes
Drank alcohol: Yes
Done drugs: No
Partied 'til the sun came up: Yes
Gotten a ticket: No
Been arrested: No
Been convicted of a crime: No
Been in a wreck: No
Been out of the country: Yes

--Random & Silly Junk--

Are you a virgin: Yes
Ever TP'd someone's house: No
Ever egged someone's house: No
How many languages do you speak: Two
Who do you compare yourself to: No one
Ever regret anything: Sometimes
Do you like being tickled: Yes?
What are your goals: um...
Are your fingers tired: No
Are you tired of this survey: Maybe
Are you happy: Yes


1, What color is your toothbrush?

Depends... at Dads its hot pink, at my house and nans its light pink and white (I HATE PINK)

2, Name one person who made you smile today:


3, What were you doing at 8 am this morning:

Sleeping, lol

4, What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Sleeping or computer

5, What is your favorite candy bar?

Mars bar!

6, Have you ever been to a strip club?

Urm…. No thank you?

7, What is the last thing you said aloud?

Are we going to see transformers friday? (sorry, Ilove those movies)

8, What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

Roasted Marshmellow

9, What was the last thing you had to drink?

Chocolate milk

10, Do you like your wallet?


11, What was the last thing you ate?

French vanilla ice cream that tasted like smoke...

12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week?

Yeah! Gladiator shoes! (the cute ones, not the ugly ones)

13, The last sporting event you watched?

Stanley Cup Finals!

14, What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

Um I dont know...

15, Who is the last person you sent a text message too?

Jackie (my uncle)

16, Ever go camping?

Yeah like evry summer!

17, Do you take vitamins daily?

Used too, not no more

18, Do you go to church every Sunday?

No, but I used to volunteer in the summer at my church for this youth group thing...

19, Do you have a tan?

NOPE! Dont want one! I LOVE being pale! ;)

20,Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?


21, Do you drink your soda with a straw?

No... PLUS! I drink pop. Not soda!

22, What did your last text message say?

Um... dont remember

23, What are you doing tomorrow?

Not sure

25, Look to your left, what do you see?

A stool

26, What color is your watch?


27, What do you think of when you hear Australia?


28, What is your birthstone?


29, Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?

Depends on were it is...

30, What is your favorite number?

7 or 17

31, Who's the last person you talked to on the phone?


32, Any plans today?

Probably go back to bed and watch movies

33, How many states have you lived in?

Just one!

34, Biggest annoyance right now?

My dads girlfriends parents are here

35, Last song listened to?

Im not your boy friend baby -30h!3

36,Can you say the alphabet backwards?


37, Do you have a maid service clean your house?

No! I wish

38, Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?

My Black flip flops or my brown etnies

39, Are you jealous of anyone?

Bella Swan!

40, Is anyone jealous of you?


41, Do you love anyone?


42, Do any of your friends have children?


43, What do you usually do during the day?

Computer, MSN, fanfiction, eat, sleep etc...

44, Do you hate anyone that you know right now?

I DONT hate! I dislike!

45, Do you use the word 'hello' daily?

Um... It depends...

46, What color is your car?


47, Do you like cats?

Like bears more! (bears are mt fav animal)

48. Are you thinking about someone right now?


49, Have you ever been to Six Flags?

NO! but I guess I wanna go

50, How did you get your worst scar?

Um.. I have so manny...

¸.•´¸•´¨) ¸.•¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´~Pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer!

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.bananas are good for period pain.it's good to cry.chicken soup actually makes you feel better.94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.lying is actually unhealthy.you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.chocolate will make you feel better.most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.a good friend never judges.a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.boys aren't worth your tears.we all love surprises.Now... make a wish.Wish REALLY hard!!WISH WISH WISH WISH Your wish has just been received.Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...Your wish will be granted

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself (i find that i am a very tough opponent). So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list:Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.4.all.the.emo.boyz, WritingRocks6, GlindaFied26, XxXpurplelilyxXx, Bookluvrxoxo, Daydreamer897, The Friendly Chupacabra, Shorty and KG Inc., AVirgoGirl, xcheergrlx3, percyrocksmysox, percabethroxmysox, alene236, Christine232, pupp63

95 percent of all kids make fun of and laugh at other kids because you're different. If you're that 5 percent who laugh at that 95 percent because they're all the same, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end,

1. i need to tell you a secret.(look at #5)
2. the answer is... (look at #11)
3. don't get mad. (look at #15)
4. calm down. (look at #13)
5. first. (look at #2)
6. don't be that mad. (look at #12)
7. i just wanted to say hi. :)
8. what i wanted to tell you is... (look at 14)
9. be patient. (look at #4)
10. this is the last time, okay? (look at #7)
11. i'm not crazy. (look at #6)
12. sorry. (look at #8)
13. don't be hype. (look at #10)
14. i don't know how to say this. (look at #3)
15. you must be ticked off now. (look at #9)

Quick answers...
Okay, this is called the “FIRST REACTIONS QUIZ”. I have reacted to being sent this by actually filling this out. You have to type the 1ST thing that comes to mind whenever you hear these 35 things. You can’t think and go back and change your answers. Copy and Paste, then delete answers to make them your own.

1. Beer: drunk

2. Anorexic: skinny

3. Relationships: cute :)

4. Purple: gross

5. Power Rangers: wildforce

6. Weed: Justin

7. Steroids: Him.. :(

8. Cartoons: TV

9. The President: Obama

10. Tupperware: container

11. Best vacation: ..

12. Santa Claus: christmas

13. Halloween: my fav holliday

14. Bon Jovi: ew

15. Grammar: is fine?

16. Facebook: picturtes

18. Marriage: family

19. Paris Hilton: stupid

21. Redhead: emily

22. Blonde: jessica :P

23. Pass the time: i miss him..

24. One night stands: STD's

25. Donald Trump: hm..

26. Neverland: Peter Pan

27. Pixie Sticks: yumm :)

28. Vanilla ice cream: i prefer chocolate

29. High School: its not bad

30. Work: ick.

31. Pajamas: going to sleep

32. Woods: hunting

33. Wet Sock: clare >:(

34. Alcohol: rehabilitation center

35. Love: Tomas :)

Dear Diary,
I would like to la push Jacob of a cliff.

Dear Diary,

Today, I made Carlisle think he was in love with Edward…Again! LOL!

Love, Jasper

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Relation or relationship by Stormy Bella reviews
Bella go to Forks and lives with her adopted uncle, Edward. She fell in love with Edward, and he her. When society scold upon them, would this love be worth it, or would Jacob be the better choice? First fanfic.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 35 - Words: 114,308 - Reviews: 4211 - Favs: 2,391 - Follows: 1,950 - Updated: 7/28 - Published: 2/1/2008 - Complete
Forbidden Fruit by Taters7 reviews
Bella Swan mother Died when Bella was just 2 years old. Now living with a father that beats her and having a crush or maybe even in love with her English teacher Edward Cullen Bella dosnt know what to do, What will her teacher do to help her. All human
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 27 - Words: 29,856 - Reviews: 1210 - Favs: 716 - Follows: 406 - Updated: 6/27/2014 - Published: 2/12/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Truth and Dare by Princess Aziza reviews
Rosalie wants to play Truth and Dare! What will the other Cullens do? Includes the Volvo, sparkles, and...Baby Bop!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,057 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 10/8/2013 - Published: 5/10/2009
Edward Vs the Toddler by Butterscotch82 reviews
Ch.1: Edward faces his toughest--or at least, his most annoying--adversary yet, in the form of a two-year-old. Post Twilight . Ch. 2: Find out how Edward and Bella handle Nessie when she takes on some of Eddie's less charming traits. Post Breaking Dawn .
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,870 - Reviews: 192 - Favs: 577 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 12/26/2012 - Published: 6/28/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Seduces Me by invisiblepen93 reviews
Edward goes out with Bella, he is about to get a big promotion, but bella gets the feeling that he does not love her anymore, he thinks otherwise. RATED M FOR A REASON! LEMONS IN NEXT CHAPTER/ this is background info, essential to upcoming chapters!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,843 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 12/8/2012 - Published: 1/22/2010 - Bella, Edward
The Cookie by Imaginary1.x reviews
Why Does Bella Have a Traumatized look on her face? Why Does She Have A Giant Cookie? And why is Carlisle Trying to Shut Her Up? Read & Review. Some Of them OCC.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,299 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 8/12/2012 - Published: 2/8/2008 - Bella
Rescue me by venomousgal reviews
Bella Swan is accident prone and always in need of rescuing. Sexy neighbour Edward Masen is an EMT and more than willing to handle the job.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 37 - Words: 111,997 - Reviews: 3305 - Favs: 3,129 - Follows: 2,746 - Updated: 8/12/2012 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Love of My Life by x3Kiome reviews
Emmett? Where's Bella?" With a sigh, he whispered back. "She's gone man. Gone." Incomplete Probably for forever
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,588 - Reviews: 194 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 162 - Updated: 8/1/2012 - Published: 10/25/2008 - Edward, Bella
Yours, Mine and Ours by imma vampire reviews
Bella, a single mother of three boys is having a difficult time relating to her kids when she meets Edward, the single father of three girls the same age. The attraction is instant, but the challenge comes with the kids. Will they all get along? Is it possible for them to overcome differences and become a family? AU, AH. M for Lemons. This story is mostly fluff.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 38 - Words: 90,075 - Reviews: 2533 - Favs: 2,124 - Follows: 728 - Updated: 1/30/2012 - Published: 7/13/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
SEX, DRUGS AND TECHNO MUSIC by shy-baby-2007 reviews
bella and edward were bestfriends, bella moves away only to come back 7 years later. what will happen. sex, drug,and techno music best of all worlds. disclaimer: i dont own nothing zip notta so on and so on *crying on the inside* R&R lemons.smiles
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 47,238 - Reviews: 259 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 11/22/2011 - Published: 10/9/2008 - Edward, Bella
Growls And Kisses by Nature.Calls reviews
Bella and Edward. Lemon. No plot. Just vampire sex.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 5 - Words: 10,457 - Reviews: 124 - Favs: 269 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 10/19/2011 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Torture, Sex and Submission by BandC reviews
A saucy lil' story about Dominate Edward and a 7 day slave training experience for submissive Bella. Spanking and mature sex scenes so not for children. Who knows what master Edward can inflict on poor Bella BDSM, SPANKING, DOM!SUB, TORTURE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,111 - Reviews: 171 - Favs: 215 - Follows: 331 - Updated: 7/26/2011 - Published: 2/17/2009 - Bella, Edward
15 Things To Do At Walmart Cullen Style by twilighters-anonymous reviews
Ever get those annoying, yet funny chain e-mails that say stuff like “15 Things To Do At Walmart”? This is what happens when Bella gets one and decides to enlist the Cullens to help her actually do them!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 9,843 - Reviews: 342 - Favs: 262 - Follows: 181 - Updated: 7/14/2011 - Published: 7/10/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Are You Up for A Game of Truth or Dare? by belwight reviews
The Cullens play their favorite pastime. What else? Truth or Dare? Chaos ensues and secrets are revealed. Slight OOC. Please read.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 12,154 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 6/23/2011 - Published: 4/15/2009 - Complete
Straight From the Textbooks by weartheseshorts reviews
When Bella is late for her assigned study room, she has no choice but to share the back room with her very hot teacher from high school. Short story. Lemon. All-Human. Bella/Edward. Inspired by Jayeliwood's "Sexy Eddie Contest".
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 64,463 - Reviews: 394 - Favs: 1,020 - Follows: 845 - Updated: 6/7/2011 - Published: 10/8/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Babysitting Bella Chronicles by capitaine-awesome reviews
Cullens are hunting for the weekend and Emmett gets to babysit Bella. He has a list of 10 activities planned for the weekend. Features Alcohol, vibrators, pole dancing, Emmett wearing a bra, fake orgasms and a very drunk Bella .
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,389 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 140 - Updated: 5/14/2011 - Published: 10/9/2009 - Emmett, Bella
I loved you before I met you by livetolovetwilight reviews
So this is a story about a girl, Bella. she is raped, and then found, saved. She makes the greatest friends, will she find the love she didn't think that she deserved after she became tainted? Rated M for the sex
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 23,894 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 4/25/2011 - Published: 12/16/2008
Double Oh Sexy by Deepredruby reviews
Bella is on vacation, hoping to relax for once. But, when a mystrious broze haired god shows up in her room, she finds herself not scared, but curious. What kind of secrets is he keeping? AU, all human. Please Review!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 14,420 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 2/16/2011 - Published: 3/16/2008
Truth or Dare High School Friends by TWILIGHT LOVERR OFICIALL reviews
Bella, Edward and the rest of the cullens are attending to Forks high school. One day, the students stay locked in school because of a snow storm and they start playing truth or dare. Very embarassing. Bella is still human, but is engaged to Edward.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,965 - Reviews: 202 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 147 - Updated: 1/29/2011 - Published: 3/22/2009 - Edward, Bella
finding true love by SFJ0813 reviews
emmettxbella Edward brakes up with Bella and Emmett comforts her will it be true love... rosalie and bella are very close and rosalie and emmett are divorced but are friends
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 16,776 - Reviews: 134 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 157 - Updated: 1/24/2011 - Published: 12/2/2008 - Bella, Emmett
Those Three Words by Randomly Sarah reviews
Bella has moved to forks to live with her brother Emmett and her dad Charlie. Then she meets Edward... is it love? Or not...Read to find out... please review. rated M for lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 28 - Words: 32,027 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 1/15/2011 - Published: 11/30/2008 - Bella, Edward
Something Was Missing by KLuTZ 122 reviews
Bella and Edward were best friends. that is...until bella was forced to leave pheonix and Edward behind. Now, she is the adoptive daughter of Carlisle, but who are the new twins coming into her home? OOC! All human! AU! PLS R&R
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 8,890 - Reviews: 354 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 250 - Updated: 1/15/2011 - Published: 12/11/2007 - Bella, Edward
Working with the enemy by Mega-Twilight-fan1991 reviews
Bella Swan and Edward Cullen hate each other. Edwards the school player and Bella despises him. What happens when there forced to work together on a school project? All human, normal pairings, kinda OOC! rated m for bad language, just incase.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 56,274 - Reviews: 498 - Favs: 472 - Follows: 237 - Updated: 11/11/2010 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Raising Bella by MilkshakeFanfiction reviews
Edward Cullen's life is turned upside down one night as he takes in the scent of the most desirable blood imaginable. But he discovers the scent in the form of a two year old, alone in the woods. Can he resist temptation long enough to raise her?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 40,796 - Reviews: 496 - Favs: 344 - Follows: 384 - Updated: 11/6/2010 - Published: 10/14/2008 - Bella, Edward
Truth or Dare, Cullen Style by canadianfatcake reviews
Alice has a vision. It involves all of the Cullens. They are going to play TRUTH OR DARE. Not all of the members want to play; but in the end, they all shall enjoy it as Emmett is made gay, and Alice and Jasper's truth comes out. Funny. Some Bad Language.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 14 - Words: 28,223 - Reviews: 345 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 10/29/2010 - Published: 12/29/2008
TheMissingChronicle:TheLion,The Witch&HisLioness by BringOnTheShackles reviews
Bella is captured and sold as a slave to Edward. She hates him, she doesn't love him, she doesn't even know his second name. But is there more to Bella than meets the eye? After all Bella is only short for Isabella. Isabella Swan. Lemons;Etc
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 97,788 - Reviews: 2217 - Favs: 1,402 - Follows: 974 - Updated: 9/14/2010 - Published: 3/26/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Caught by artisticteach reviews
Bella is sexually frustrated, extremely so since she and Edward have agreed to wait. When Edward is away Bella decides to take matters into her own hands, only to discover she can't bring herself to finish. What happens when Edward walks in? OOC/lemons
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,631 - Reviews: 128 - Favs: 203 - Follows: 194 - Updated: 9/10/2010 - Published: 5/2/2009 - Bella, Edward
Teddybears, Boogeymen and Bedtime Stories by demented bunny reviews
Bella is six years old and is adopted by the cullens but the Cullens dont know that Edward is hiding something. Cullens are vampires. Bella is a human. ExB
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 65,154 - Reviews: 2413 - Favs: 1,239 - Follows: 1,092 - Updated: 9/9/2010 - Published: 12/23/2008 - Bella, Edward
Hello, You Must Be My Sex Therapist by venom with love reviews
Bella is a sex therapist. Her new client just so happens to be Edward, who is a virgin that comes to her for help. All Human.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 16,831 - Reviews: 499 - Favs: 511 - Follows: 846 - Updated: 8/29/2010 - Published: 8/15/2008 - Edward, Bella
I Will Love You by twolden77 reviews
5 years after Edward left Bella. Bella is an English teacher. Edward is a new student in her class.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 26,861 - Reviews: 700 - Favs: 396 - Follows: 467 - Updated: 8/19/2010 - Published: 3/12/2009 - Bella, Edward
Run Away, Run Away by Princess Aziza reviews
Bella tries to escape from her abusive stepfather. When she stumbles onto a house in the woods, she never expects what is waiting for her there... First fanfic. EdwardxBella.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 20,115 - Reviews: 295 - Favs: 212 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 8/15/2010 - Published: 3/1/2009 - Bella, Edward
Forget Me Not by Princess Aziza reviews
During New Moon. Bella is bitten by a vampire, and she stays near Forks. Seventy years later, the Cullens return. Will Bella accept them...or reject them? Canon couples, mainly ExB.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,942 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 8/15/2010 - Published: 5/2/2009
Emmett and Bella New Version by PoohBearLuv reviews
Emmett and Bella Are Two Characters That Deal With Infidelity Betrayal And Love. Also They Face Alot Of Challenges and Letdowns In This Story !
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,370 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 8/4/2010 - Published: 3/16/2008 - Emmett, Bella
Student Affair by Dlynn reviews
All human story, BellaxEdward, Edward is Bella's new English teacher and can't control his feelings. Even though Bella already has a boyfriend. Beta Reader: Michelle62092
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 32 - Words: 30,541 - Reviews: 924 - Favs: 621 - Follows: 661 - Updated: 7/31/2010 - Published: 4/18/2008 - Bella, Edward
Sold! by fairytaleluver reviews
It's Bella's b-day and she returns home to find her father murdered. She then finds her self being sold as a slave to Edward. Read and find out the rest. Sorry. I'm not good at summaries. First fanfic so please no flames.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,794 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 75 - Updated: 7/12/2010 - Published: 6/21/2008
Seducing Ms Swan by DQRC reviews
AU Post-NM. Teacher!Bella, Student!Edward; a struggle of wills, an attempt at seduction, a dark secret, a dash of UST, a gallon of attitude, antagonistic motorcycling, a hell of a lot of angst and one unforgettable scene in a snow storm.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 22 - Words: 132,610 - Reviews: 5881 - Favs: 6,159 - Follows: 4,833 - Updated: 7/12/2010 - Published: 7/26/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Enough for Forever Twilight in Edward's POV by newsjukie20 reviews
Edward's POV during Twilight
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,947 - Reviews: 92 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 7/10/2010 - Published: 7/24/2007
From the Start by thesunshinegirl reviews
Bella is adopted into the Cullen family when she is 4 years old. This is about her and Edward's relationship as she grows older and they begin to develop feelings toward each other.Please review! LUV YA XOXO Tennis222
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 5,225 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 6/30/2010 - Published: 6/19/2008
Hate Me by twilight-fedishfreak reviews
Im not sure what to say Bella just moved to Forks.Shes aloot diffrent,Rene died,Charlie's an abusive drunk tell me what you think about it! Rated for hint of abuse and lemons in the future....
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 16 - Words: 23,783 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 6/28/2010 - Published: 5/8/2008
Twilight Spoof by BabyYoureMyOxygen reviews
One day, Alice decides to make a small spoof dedicated to their suddenly soap-opera resembled lives. How will it turn out when she sits the entire family down to watch it? With an embarrased Bella, a frustrated Edward, and a booming Emmett, the fun is endless for an entire laugh-filled night.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 5,302 - Reviews: 191 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 6/19/2010 - Published: 10/28/2008 - Alice - Complete
All Work and No Play by herinfiniteeyes reviews
Bella is a senior in high school who works hard for her future. Mr. Cullen is the assistant principal willing to do anything to help her succeed. How can this possibly work? Follow Bella as she learns and matures. AH, AU, lemons. MA content.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 64,214 - Reviews: 1647 - Favs: 1,668 - Follows: 1,664 - Updated: 6/14/2010 - Published: 11/5/2008 - Bella, Edward
Taken by rippnercullen reviews
Bella is kidnapped one night to become a 'slave present' for Edward Cullen, a boy who seems to just abuse her. But Bella is sure that underneath he must love her.....right? WARNINGS: Pain, language, lemons, spanking and rippnercullenness! Ed/Be NO JACOB
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 36,730 - Reviews: 934 - Favs: 921 - Follows: 864 - Updated: 5/31/2010 - Published: 4/21/2009 - Bella, Edward
Sexual Healings by MartiniBaby1 reviews
Four healing sexual encounters. A tryst in each season. Three chance encounters and two very different people with at least one thing in common: both are heartbroken and afraid to let love in once more. Edward x Bella, all human
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 30,820 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 5/26/2010 - Published: 9/9/2009 - Edward, Bella
Conversations with Emmett by Ranma15177 reviews
While Edward is away hunting Bella plans to spend time learning everything there is to know about Emmett, and through him more about Edward. However, Tanya comes and disrupts the bonding. Hilarity ensues! "What do you mean he was naked?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 9 - Words: 29,546 - Reviews: 797 - Favs: 779 - Follows: 867 - Updated: 5/20/2010 - Published: 3/9/2008
The Cullens watch : THE RING by AvrilSays reviews
The Cullens watch The Ring, and are scared out of their wits. Alice and Bella decide to play a little prank on them... COMPLETE! SEQUEL UP!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,099 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 5/14/2010 - Published: 1/6/2009 - Complete
Truth or Dare with the Cullens by AvrilSays reviews
Truth or Dare with the Cullens. My very first humor fic...in which Alice's clothes get ripped up, Rosalie's car is painted hot pink with neon green stripes, and Bella is the evil genius. Extremely OOC. R&R please. HIATUS.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,093 - Reviews: 151 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 5/14/2010 - Published: 12/30/2008
SexEd by Stefania Cullen reviews
This is a really funny and -going to be- lemony story. About Bella, Rose and Alice teaching Sex Ed at Forks junior high. Writen by three best friends All human and positively hilarious. well we think so : Read and Reaview Please!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 38,024 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 5/8/2010 - Published: 12/10/2008
SexEdward! by Ali Edward Cullen reviews
BxAxR BFFLs. What will happen when they are hired to go back to their old high school to teach a class of horny and ignorant teenagers SEX-ED? Rated M for future LEMONS. Canon Pairings. OOC/AU/AH Co-writen w/ Stefania Cullen Mrs.Cullen4Ever93 RxR PLEASE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 40,625 - Reviews: 154 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 5/8/2010 - Published: 12/9/2008 - Bella, Edward
SexEdward by Mrs.Cullen4Ever93 reviews
OOC AU AH.Bella Alice and Rose are sex ed teachers. What happens when the class they teach is Mr. Cullen Middle school Bio Class. Rated M for future LEMONS! R&R
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 38,593 - Reviews: 99 - Favs: 69 - Follows: 109 - Updated: 5/8/2010 - Published: 11/15/2008
Bella Home Videos by H.M.T.H reviews
Bella and the Cullens watch Bella's home videos, much to bella's dismay. I’m using H20 characters. You don’t need to know them. It just basically says what you need in the story. For those of you who do know H20 they are never mermaids.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,820 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 4/28/2010 - Published: 3/28/2009
Gird Your Loins by greeneyedgirl813 reviews
Bella has her period. Oh god. It sure is going to be a week in the Cullen house. Rated M to be safe.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 16,369 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 4/7/2010 - Published: 2/4/2009 - Bella
Jasper and Emmett's Offical Cullen Annoyance Guide by El Leon Y La Oveja reviews
When you don't eat or sleep, it leaves you a lot of spare time. Some vampires study, some compose music and Jasper and Emmett annoy their family. Manipulating the emotions of others can be used for fun too... RATED M FOR SOME SEXUAL HUMOUR
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 13 - Words: 17,173 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 2/23/2010 - Published: 4/17/2009 - Jasper, Emmett - Complete
Truth or What? by XXObsessivelyTwilightXX reviews
NO FLAMES! All of the Cullens and Jacob play a game all truth or dare. They play in a totally different way. What crazy things are going to happen? OOC
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 5,995 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 2/10/2010 - Published: 3/11/2009 - Alice
So Called God Among Men by artisticteach reviews
Originally for The Sexy Edward Contest by twilightaddict26 which was my old account -Edward thinks he's God's gift to women and the new girl knocks him off his player pedestal. Slutty and Slightly Dominant Edward.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,297 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 176 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 1/25/2010 - Published: 5/2/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
My Sweet, Sour, Sexy revenge by CBCRAZYGRL5 reviews
Bella was a nerd in Elementary school. She was bullied by lauren and edward. What happens when she comes back smarter, cooler, and a whole lot sexier? Rated M for sex/violence in future chapters.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 22,745 - Reviews: 153 - Favs: 233 - Follows: 224 - Updated: 1/19/2010 - Published: 1/25/2009
Collide by MartiniBaby1 reviews
As usual, Bella is late for work and as she crosses the street -without looking-, a cycling music teacher, better know as Edward Cullen, must do all he can to avoid her. But the collision that follows will change their lives for good. All human, AU & OOC.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 29 - Words: 146,180 - Reviews: 1027 - Favs: 681 - Follows: 449 - Updated: 1/10/2010 - Published: 12/30/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The bet by Bite-Me-66 reviews
The cullens are back in Forks and Emmet makes a bet between Bella and Edward, leading to fun and for all the family. Will the boys or girls win? Will Bella go to prom for the first time since she was changed?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 16,077 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 1/9/2010 - Published: 3/6/2009 - Edward, Bella
The Pond by ShinySewage reviews
Bella Swan is an 18 year old indentured servant in the 16th century. She is sold to the mysterious and wealthy Cullen family. What does she find out about them? and how will she and her new master Edward Cullen get along? OOC.*
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 42,666 - Reviews: 753 - Favs: 699 - Follows: 482 - Updated: 1/5/2010 - Published: 11/19/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Shaken by BadLuck92 reviews
Bella gets to spend two weeks with the Cullens, after some fun times a face from her past comes back, a crazy ex-boyfriend, and he has plans that do not include Edward. Rating could go up.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,543 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 12/26/2009 - Published: 4/9/2009
New Neighbor by Raegan Marie reviews
Previously a one-shot! Bella moves into her new apartment and Edward lives across the hall. This is a moving day she will never forget. LEMONS!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 63,275 - Reviews: 377 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 318 - Updated: 12/7/2009 - Published: 5/6/2009 - Bella, Edward
The School of Hot Addiction by sambeam reviews
Edward's the teacher, Bella's the student... smut in every chapter? Well yes! It's very prudent! AH/ OOC. ExB.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,663 - Reviews: 674 - Favs: 644 - Follows: 904 - Updated: 12/5/2009 - Published: 4/19/2009 - Bella, Edward
Golden Glances by dariussane reviews
The Volturi came with out warning and The Cullen's had to gather fast to change Bella. What will happen next? Edward in Panties! And Now Bell's dare! But wait there Trouble ahead for the Cullens? LEMONS! And there could be WAR!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,075 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 12/2/2009 - Published: 3/2/2009 - Edward, Bella
Linger by Skanky Frankie reviews
PWP. Bella and Edward, gettin it on... Lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,987 - Reviews: 166 - Favs: 399 - Follows: 275 - Updated: 11/30/2009 - Published: 11/24/2008 - Bella, Edward
Edward, Truth or Dare? by KatalinaK16 reviews
Bella and Edward play Truth or Dare, and it gets out of control. Emmett in the end! Bellas POV. Bella's human and Edwards a vamp. Last Chapter is finally out: I'm really sorry about the unreal amount of time it took.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,084 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 133 - Updated: 11/29/2009 - Published: 11/18/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Child's Play by Popular Dorks reviews
Alice, Jasper, Carlisle, and Esme all go hunting. Alice has a vision about a family in danger and attempt to rescue them. They only saved the baby, Bella. She becomes part of the Cullen family. What crazy thing will happen now that Bella is here?BxE soon
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,334 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 94 - Updated: 11/28/2009 - Published: 6/13/2008
Bella and Emmett's Songs by Completely Dipendente reviews
Bella is drunk and her and Emmett are writing songs about some of the people they know. Please review, even if you hate it x
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 10,151 - Reviews: 712 - Favs: 290 - Follows: 148 - Updated: 11/28/2009 - Published: 1/23/2009 - Bella, Emmett
Truth Or Dare With The Cullens Spring Break by Mallory Cullen reviews
Bella bends Edwards rules and get punished. She must play a truth or dare game with the Cullen's. I don't own Twilight or any of the characters. Rated T for now, but might change. Kind of OOC. EXB/EmXR/JXA.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 11,267 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 80 - Updated: 11/14/2009 - Published: 3/25/2009
A Dream, The Dreamer and A Changing Girl by BrooklynTwiGirl reviews
Bella Swan is a sexually repressed college student who equates her lack of a love life with being an Old Maid. Edward Cullen Masen is the psychotherapist who helps her through it and falls in love which he though was impossible. Sparks fly!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,646 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 11/13/2009 - Published: 8/23/2009 - Bella, Edward
Toxic Existence by EternalxSunshine reviews
Edward has wanted Bella to be his meal since he caught her scent. He captures her and takes her to be his meal. But what will happen when Edward changes his mind, will he fall for her? OOC WARNING! DARK/DOMINANT Edward.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,521 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 158 - Follows: 203 - Updated: 11/5/2009 - Published: 6/30/2009 - Bella, Edward
Truth Or Dare: The Forks Way by Felicity Holly reviews
Hilarity ensues when the annual Forks High Picnic is held in the gym due to 'weather conditions', and Jessica suggests that they all -including Bella and the Cullens- play truth or dare.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,303 - Reviews: 130 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 11/4/2009 - Published: 11/29/2008
The Last One by secamimom reviews
Edward and Bella have known each other since grade school. Now they work together. Edward always seems to have the upper hand in situations, which pisses Bella off. This story has a Cocky Edward and a Snarky Bella. AH, Canon-pairings.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 21,934 - Reviews: 219 - Favs: 178 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 10/27/2009 - Published: 7/20/2009 - Bella, Edward
Bringing April Early by klutzygirl34 reviews
Bella is sick of Emmett and Jasper always pranking her, so she with the help of Rosalie, Esme and Alice, she will bring April Fool's Day early this year.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,449 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 10/23/2009 - Published: 12/29/2008 - Bella
Your Servant by Justme1339 reviews
It is 18th century England. Bella runs away from an arranged marriage, and joins the Cullen's household staff as a maid. She falls in love with Edward Cullen. Bella/human, Cullens/Vamps, A/U, Canon Pairings, Will earn its M rating
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,602 - Reviews: 155 - Favs: 151 - Follows: 203 - Updated: 10/18/2009 - Published: 1/4/2009
Punish Me by simplegirlsandkatiegirls reviews
Bella has been such a bad girl that she has to go see Principal Cullen. hot little one-shot that is my entry for the D/s birthday contest. ExB AH AU OOC rated M for LEMONS A PLENTY! please review it makes me smile!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,942 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 455 - Follows: 98 - Updated: 10/12/2009 - Published: 3/6/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Free At Last by darkxlight reviews
ON OFFICIAL HIATUS! After BD, Rather OOC and AU. Bella and Edward decide to take a month-long second honeymoon to explore both their new mansion and their sex life. What can they do in 31 days? Warning: Lemons galore starting w/ ch.2 ! BxE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 34,338 - Reviews: 365 - Favs: 377 - Follows: 405 - Updated: 10/11/2009 - Published: 11/27/2008 - Bella, Edward
Secrets by Angela Cullen reviews
After Edward left Bella in NM, she moves to the reservation to live with Jacob. She never stops talking to Alice, and after spending the day with her she learns that Jacob has been lying to her for two years. M for possible lemons
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,419 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/2/2009 - Published: 2/5/2009
A Day With Emmett Cullen by Alex-Marie-1992 reviews
Emmett/Bella bonding. permanent hiatus and being taken over by frosty1974
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,458 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/30/2009 - Published: 7/15/2007
Twilight Summer Cullen's style by officiallyemmett reviews
It's summer time in Forks. Bella's hanging out with the Cullen's summer to bring out their fun side. Water fights...shopping...and summer BBQ's ...pinics..and a game of truth or dare :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,486 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 9/28/2009 - Published: 8/26/2009 - Bella
A Gripping Surprise by Lacy Stewart reviews
Emmett surprises Bella. Will her life ever be the same?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 24 - Words: 78,164 - Reviews: 727 - Favs: 787 - Follows: 402 - Updated: 9/26/2009 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Bella, Emmett - Complete
good times with the cullens by josie1901 reviews
funny romantic!Im reposting an old story called pranks.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,055 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/20/2009 - Published: 4/12/2009
Girls Just Want to Have Fun by 2carm2carm2 reviews
Bella, Rosalie and Alice were annoyed with Edward, Emmett and Jasper. They get a strange idea. So now the girls are traveling to Canada to meet Rob Pattinson, Kellan Lutz, and Jackson Rathbone. Big surprises with twists and turns, and Edward. Oh Dang! R&R
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Adventure - Chapters: 19 - Words: 24,119 - Reviews: 490 - Favs: 207 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 9/19/2009 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Bella, Alice - Complete
The Trials Of Working For The Mason's by Dawn Run reviews
It is 1916 The Maid has been found to be with child. The Mason family get rid of her, and in looking for a replacement, employ young Bella Swan, to take her place. However, Bella is unprepared when she comes face to face with the young master, Edward.OOC
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,244 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 9/17/2009 - Published: 6/16/2009 - Edward, Bella
A Lonely Vampire by Dlynn reviews
A lonely and heart throbbing vampire, for years has watched an orphan lay flowers on her parents’ tombstone, but when she goes missing. Edward is determined to find Bella.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,208 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 9/7/2009 - Published: 4/5/2009 - Edward, Bella
Assassin by Oriana de la Rose reviews
Edward is a hitman, the prisoner of a past he can’t escape. When he discovers a girl lying in the road, beaten, he carries her to his home. Can two broken souls mend even when death is on the horizon? AH/OOC.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,540 - Reviews: 375 - Favs: 246 - Follows: 297 - Updated: 9/1/2009 - Published: 8/2/2009
Cullen Family Vacation by Nicollette Knight reviews
The Cullens are in Chicago. What happens when they try to take a "normal" family vacation?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 12 - Words: 10,823 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 8/30/2009 - Published: 7/19/2009 - Complete
Meant to Be by Stefania Cullen reviews
Imagine if the Spanish influenza had never hit Chicago. If Edward and his family had never been affected by it? Read and discover the power of fate and true love. ps. I dont own twilight as u most likely've realized lol
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 10,646 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 8/25/2009 - Published: 8/18/2008
Mistletoe by Don'tLetThemGetYouDown reviews
Can I kiss you?" Like he needed to ask. "I don't think my boyfriend would like that very much." I whispered stopping my assault to the side of his face. He froze as if suddenly realizing that Mike existed. I nibbled on his ear. "But I know I would." Lemon
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 49,261 - Reviews: 1744 - Favs: 1,331 - Follows: 599 - Updated: 8/24/2009 - Published: 9/6/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Pleasuring Edward by little-nessieC reviews
Bella gives Edward a favor.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,172 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 140 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 8/21/2009 - Published: 11/9/2008 - Complete
Truth or Dare a day with the Cullens by lizzyvamp1901 reviews
It all started with a game of Truth or Dare. Now, the Cullens will remember that summer for the rest of their eternal lives. WARNING This fanfiction includes Edward as a stripper, DETENTION, Jazz being eaten and Bella getting arrested... by Charlie.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 43 - Words: 33,338 - Reviews: 1824 - Favs: 1,029 - Follows: 503 - Updated: 8/21/2009 - Published: 12/2/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Dude Has Issues by demented bunny reviews
“Bella?”, he asked peering up at me with innocent eyes.“Yes Edward?”, I asked.“Can I go home with you?”. Funny and different give it a try. Pretty original and definately unique.Blurring the lines between Twilight and the realms of crazy. TEMPORARY HIATUS
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,372 - Reviews: 190 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 8/12/2009 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Bella, Edward
Alice and Bella's Secret by rebel1499 reviews
What happens after Bella gets drunk at Jessica's party then decides to play truth or dare with Alice when they get home? A whole lot of secrets to hide from Jasper and Edward that's what. AxB
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,915 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 126 - Updated: 8/10/2009 - Published: 7/12/2008 - Alice, Bella
Sex Toy by Oriana de la Rose reviews
Edward Cullen has two jobs: Underwear Model and Personal Toy. Alice hires him to be the Stripper at Bella's 20th birthday party and Bella's attraction to him is instant. Then she finds out that he's her new Toy. Now Edward has a new Mistress to please...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 94,171 - Reviews: 3168 - Favs: 3,019 - Follows: 1,367 - Updated: 8/6/2009 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Complete
Saving Bella by edwardsdirtylittlesecret reviews
Bella was left broken after her relationship ended badly, when she ends up in hospital after a terrible accident there is only one person who can save her, will Edward be able to heal her physically and emotionally? Rated for language and eventual Lemon
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 19,231 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 8/6/2009 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Edward, Bella
To Love Your Teacher by MissJessx3 reviews
ALL HUMAN! What happens when Edward Cullen, fresh out of college, teaches music at Forks High? Will Bella be able to control her undeniable lust for her teacher, or will it finally become too much to handle? Possible lemons... and definite swearing.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 25,025 - Reviews: 442 - Favs: 263 - Follows: 330 - Updated: 8/4/2009 - Published: 1/31/2009 - Bella, Edward
truth or dare with the cullens by Books Are A Girl's Best Friend reviews
what involves alice in a swim suit, emmett and jessica on a date, and rosalie in a chicken costume? well truth or dare with the cullens of course!plz read!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 9,481 - Reviews: 173 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 8/2/2009 - Published: 6/20/2008 - Complete
The Black Forest by Oriana de la Rose reviews
The Black Forest holds a dark secret.....one that Edward knows about. Then a girl stumbles upon his isolated existence, a girl that he has an inexplicable attraction towards although they have never met. AH/OOC. M for Dark Smut.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,788 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 166 - Follows: 88 - Published: 7/29/2009 - Complete
Winter Break by sarah-msu reviews
Bella is off school for winter break and the Cullens invite her to their cabin for vacation. She and Edward enjoy some quality time...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 17,981 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 7/23/2009 - Published: 2/21/2009 - Bella, Edward
A Teacher's Sin REDONE by Amber is a Jasper's girl reviews
Edward Cullen is twenty-five, and he teaches chemistry at Forks High...Bella Swan is seventeen, she is a straight A student and attends Forks High...What happens when Edward has feelings for Bella? This is Indigenousbleu's idea *Amber*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 11 - Words: 6,598 - Reviews: 253 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 7/22/2009 - Published: 8/18/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Moment Of Truth by Aurag2 reviews
Rosalie and Emmett face off on a truth game. Other characters are involved. Very innapropriate but no sex invlolved. R & R.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,506 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 1/9/2009 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
I Caught Myself by Jord-El reviews
When Edward leaves in New Moon, Bella starts experiencing pregnancy symptoms. But they never had sex. How could this be happening? Not like others in this genre. I'm trying to keep it as original as possible, and avoid cliche. Updated 21st July, 09.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 18,378 - Reviews: 299 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 11/28/2008 - Bella, Edward
Shadowed Life by Passionate86 reviews
Life after BD- BxE, Edwards past comes back to haunt him, and Bella, punishment finally for the evil Jane and a prophecy fit for a Queen, how will bella cope with everything and will happen to the old coot Aro? Rated M for sexual content etc. please revie
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 22 - Words: 59,707 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 7/20/2009 - Published: 12/18/2008 - Bella, Edward
Fun at WalMart by Christine232 reviews
Bella, Jacob, and the Cullen's go to Wal-Mart to have some fun. Better than it sounds! I suck at summaries! Read and Respond!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 6,020 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 7/19/2009 - Published: 1/25/2009
Alice's Version Of Twilight by AliceCullen122 reviews
Twilight in Alice's POV...pretty self explainatory...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 16 - Words: 10,862 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 72 - Updated: 7/17/2009 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Alice, Edward
Valentine by Twilighterheart xxxx reviews
As St Valentine's day approuches Edward is loking forward to treating Bella. But when Edward and his siblings go hunting for two days, Bella starts getting misteriuos love notes. i first they don't seem so bad, but what happens when they become scary?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Horror/Mystery - Chapters: 34 - Words: 32,463 - Reviews: 246 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 7/14/2009 - Published: 5/12/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Temptations by J.Whittington reviews
Edward struggles to deal with his sexual urges, and an overenthusiastic Bella isn't helping. After a few awkward situations, Edward wants to stop all of their physical contact. But Alice has a plan! Lemons are Juicy ; Reviews mean Updates!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,783 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 7/13/2009 - Published: 5/21/2009
What's Scarier than Vampires? by beautiful fighter reviews
The Cullens and Bella decide to go camping. Emmett keeps playing pranks on Bella. Bella reads a scary book full of myths and legends. They decide to test out what is myth and what is truth. Full of scary stories and humor! Oh for heavens sake just read!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,763 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 7/12/2009 - Published: 5/3/2007
House of Lust by Oriana de la Rose reviews
After a car crash, Bella wakes up in a mansion where she agrees to pleasure the owner in exchange for medical care. Edward is the erotic owner who takes it upon himself to "heal" her. Very graphic - be warned.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 41,023 - Reviews: 1124 - Favs: 1,076 - Follows: 798 - Updated: 7/11/2009 - Published: 4/20/2009 - Complete
Insomniacs: Hide And Seek by Whatserrname reviews
The Cullens decide it is time for Bella to join in one of their favourite night-time activities, Hide and Seek. But this isn't just any old children's game, this is nation-wide, full scale Hide and Seek. Vampire Style. Just a bit of fun. Post Eclipse
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 19,622 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 210 - Follows: 161 - Updated: 7/2/2009 - Published: 4/20/2008 - Complete
Together Again Twilight by Vampirefanatic reviews
Bella and Edward were childhood friends. Then Bella moved far away. She became an orphan, and Edward's family was adopting. What happens when they meet again? ExB Fanfic
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 23,276 - Reviews: 433 - Favs: 274 - Follows: 320 - Updated: 6/28/2009 - Published: 3/9/2008
Can't Deny a Vision, Right? by EmmaleeWrites05 reviews
COMPLETE - Alice/Bella - Really OOC, AU, Vampire/human. "...Edward will not like that Alice is my world. My life. And if same sex marriage was legal I would have done that too by now.” Rated M. Was a one shot - now a story. More of a summary inside...
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 21 - Words: 61,582 - Reviews: 410 - Favs: 459 - Follows: 189 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 2/17/2009 - Alice, Bella - Complete
Twilight, Truth Or Dare by brooke-cullen reviews
What happens when Forks, High has a long weekend, Charlie is fishing all week, and Carlisle and Esme are hunting? The Cullen kids, and Bella, play truth or dare. A little OOC, R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,900 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 6/26/2009 - Published: 2/9/2009
Routine Gone Wrong by My Vampire Sparkles reviews
Bella cuts herself accidentally shaving her legs in the shower while Edward is out hunting with Emmett and Jasper. Emmett plays a prank on Edward leading to Edward hunting Emmett. Edward catches Bella's scent, dun-dun-duh! My first fanfic, please review!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 34,246 - Reviews: 124 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 81 - Updated: 6/24/2009 - Published: 12/29/2008 - Bella, Edward
Prom Night by Vespucci reviews
Tyler and Bella for prom? Edward, HELP!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,572 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 6/23/2009 - Published: 11/9/2008 - Bella, Tyler
Truth or Dare Cullen's rules by LittleClipper reviews
When Carlisle and Esme leave town for a few days and Renesmee is at charlies, the cullen teens decide to play truth or dare! what horrible truths will be disovered and what deadly dares will they be put up to?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 26 - Words: 29,553 - Reviews: 343 - Favs: 194 - Follows: 106 - Updated: 6/22/2009 - Published: 4/7/2009 - Complete
The Agony Of The Rose by Oriana de la Rose reviews
AH/OOC. Bella's thoughts and pain after Edward breaks up with her. One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,539 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 8 - Published: 6/22/2009 - Complete
Cheering in Forks by LewistheTurtle reviews
Edward is being punished by the principal for pranking Mike Newton as a dare from Emmett while Bella is visiting her mother in Florida. What will be Bella's reaction when she finds Edward like THAT!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 13,612 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 6/21/2009 - Published: 11/17/2007 - Complete
Baby Bella by Rahzelia reviews
When a mysterious "accident" turns Bella into a kid -- how will the Cullens adjust.. most especially Edward.. and can they ever change her back? One thing's for sure--Bella's gonna be a handful nine-year-old! R&R, please.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Mystery - Chapters: 11 - Words: 14,753 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 117 - Follows: 110 - Updated: 6/15/2009 - Published: 5/30/2008
Only You by alittlate reviews
Bella died...she left us...we've mourned for so long...Now 20 years later we are once again moving and starting a new school. Just as I thought we might begin to move past this tragedy I get a test message from none other than,Bella Swan. REVISED/BETA.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 10,144 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 129 - Updated: 6/13/2009 - Published: 12/13/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Cullens Throw a Party by jasperissexy reviews
bella says something stupid, and emmett and alice begin their plotting, edward get drunk, and feels lustful for everyone...slightly ooc...but thats because we are dealing with drunken vampires
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 5,395 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 6/13/2009 - Published: 12/28/2008 - Complete
Meet The McCartys by bronzehairedgirl reviews
Emmett enjoys telling Bella about his human life. A series of one shots.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,168 - Reviews: 107 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 119 - Updated: 6/10/2009 - Published: 8/24/2007 - Emmett
Biology by Oriana de la Rose reviews
Edward, a biology teacher, has been lusting after one of his students all year. What happens when she comes into his classroom after school? Edward decides to teach her the reproductive system using very unorthodox methods. Graphic Lemons. 2-parter.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,449 - Reviews: 229 - Favs: 643 - Follows: 248 - Updated: 6/9/2009 - Published: 6/7/2009 - Complete
Slumber Party Interuption by emmettandrose4ever reviews
Alice, Rosalie, and Bella decide to put on a Fashion Show for all the guys during their slumber party! But what can go wrong when Emmmett's there? Will the Fashion show ever continue? What will happen when Alice learns she knows Kung-fu? Rated T for TACOS
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 12,085 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 6/8/2009 - Published: 2/8/2009 - Emmett, Rosalie
The Desire Within us by Wolfshadow31 reviews
When Bella forgets a change of clothes for after her shower, Edward saves the day. But when he picks out a sexy bra and matching panty set for her to wear, how will Bella react? Rated M for future Lemons. Edward & Bella. Pre-Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 61,021 - Reviews: 217 - Favs: 265 - Follows: 221 - Updated: 5/31/2009 - Published: 4/25/2009 - Edward, Bella
Geek to Sheek by twilightrockz reviews
Bella is the school geek and has a crush on Edward, the king of the school. One day, Edward hurts her not physically and Alice gives her a make-over. Will there be an competition? BellaxOC or BellaxEdward The plot line may change later on. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,513 - Reviews: 264 - Favs: 154 - Follows: 158 - Updated: 5/24/2009 - Published: 1/3/2009 - Bella, Edward
Making Love Out Of Nothing At All by ashel-13 reviews
Edward thought of Bella as just a friend, but Bella always felt more.That was 3 years ago and now she's ready to make Edward Cullen fall in love with her and make this the best summer of her life. All Human OOC Lemons Gall-lore! WARNING: NC-17
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 77 - Words: 291,632 - Reviews: 11707 - Favs: 8,669 - Follows: 2,618 - Updated: 5/22/2009 - Published: 2/8/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
15 Things by writer.philosopher reviews
Comedy about WalMart and three of the Cullens. Inspired by the “15 Things to do When You’re in Walmart” list on Renesme CARLY Cullen’s profile.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,439 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/20/2009 - Published: 4/29/2009 - Emmett, Alice
Raspberries by sketchinglife reviews
Alice persuades Bella to wear a bikini to the beach. After a little clothing malfunction and a lot of embarrassment, how does Edward cheer Bella up? One-shot, ExB. All cannon. Please review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,894 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 11 - Published: 5/16/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Bella's Period by My Cinderella reviews
Bella gets her period for the first time in 17 years. How will Edward and the rest of the Cullens deal with this? Set over a course of 7 days, prepare for an adventure to stay alive, Bella!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Suspense - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,101 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 5/14/2009 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Bella, Edward
Twilight ePoV by bby e reviews
Twilight through Edward's eyes.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 8 - Words: 12,027 - Reviews: 145 - Favs: 99 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 5/14/2009 - Published: 5/23/2008 - Edward, Bella
Our Little Man by My-Bella reviews
Partner to LLC. All Human-OOC. Rated M, but mostly fluff. Edward and Bella are now parents to a baby boy, Charlie. Alice and Jasper have twins, and Lily is talking up a storm. Life for the Cullens isn't as little as it was before. Can they handle it?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 56 - Words: 265,527 - Reviews: 3784 - Favs: 1,884 - Follows: 974 - Updated: 5/13/2009 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Complete
Edward the plumber by CaughtMySelfFalling reviews
Bella and Edward have been married for a while and it seems the sparks in their sex life has started to dim. Edward has his own little plan to spark things up again. Smut McSmutalot. ExB. AH OOC.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 16,332 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 94 - Updated: 5/11/2009 - Published: 1/19/2009 - Bella, Edward
More than Friendship by AniK reviews
Bella and Edward had been friends for 13 years, one night they got drunk and had sex. They decide it meant nothing, but neither one could take the memories of that night out of their mind so they start looking for more. All human, lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 28,774 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 193 - Updated: 5/10/2009 - Published: 11/8/2008 - Bella, Edward
World at Large by DJ Danbogangsta reviews
When Bella and her mother are left deep in Charlie's gambling debts after his death, Bella takes up a maid job alongside her mother, Renee, at the impressive Cullen Masion. She thought it was just for money, but she gets so much more...ExB
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,278 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/9/2009 - Published: 3/8/2009
Hide'n'seek with the cullens by AnThOnYlUvVr4EvEr reviews
what happens when the cullens and jacob play hide and seek? will evry one be found? read and find out. very funny! review!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 1,896 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 5/3/2009 - Published: 4/24/2009
Heavy PMS by emeralda violeta reviews
what happens when bella has her period? these are very slight exaggerations of my own behavior during my own time from bella's stand point. i really get like this myself. she's a complete emotional monster to everyone. read and review. its really funny.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 26 - Words: 28,999 - Reviews: 341 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 163 - Updated: 5/2/2009 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Bella
Emmett and his pranks by ambre20AZ reviews
Well this is self explanatory..But it's what Emmett gets up to when he's bored and wants to make fun of Bella. Takes place during Eclipse. Review please...This story is almost complete. I think one more chapter
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,399 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 4/29/2009 - Published: 2/10/2009 - Emmett, Bella
A Love With No Limits: Edward & Bella by AngelAtTwilight reviews
Edward and Bella's Honeymoon. S/L
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 88,995 - Reviews: 1222 - Favs: 1,345 - Follows: 770 - Updated: 4/25/2009 - Published: 10/15/2008 - Bella, Edward
Let's Talk About Sex, Baby! by herinfiniteeyes reviews
Edward and Bella are married, but their sex life leaves something to be desired. How can they turn things around? A/H, A/U, E/B, lemons, fluff, funnies!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,079 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 338 - Follows: 79 - Published: 4/13/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Simple and Clean by Pengirl55 reviews
Bella Swan was raped, but she can't tell anybody. When she meets Edward Cullen, she has finally found the person she can talk to. But he can’t help her. So Bella will do whatever it takes to confide in the one person who's the most dangerous to her.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 26,018 - Reviews: 269 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 4/10/2009 - Published: 11/7/2008 - Bella, Edward
What Happened Last Night? by PrettyLittlePsycho reviews
What happens when Bella wakes up in a strange place and has no idea how she got there? And what happens at school with Edward and his beautiful family? AU, LEMONS.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 13,554 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 4/7/2009 - Published: 10/30/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Sitter by Alicefan1 reviews
What happens when Emmett baby sits Bella's little Renesmee?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,886 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 4/5/2009 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Complete
When Renee comes to visit by EdwardIs4Me reviews
Renee comes to visit Bella and the Cullens. But much to Bella’s embarrassment she brings pics and videos …. BTW Bella is still human. Hope you RR&L Read Review& Like Whoever tells me their opinion 1st gets a sneak-peak! 3
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,426 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 4/4/2009 - Published: 3/15/2009 - Bella, Edward
The Strangers by Jaq's-Out-Punching-Werewolves reviews
Emmett watchs Bella when everyone else gose hunting. he gets her drunk the takes her to get her belly button pirced. this is a one-shot. very, very funny
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,626 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/3/2009 - Published: 7/25/2008 - Emmett, Bella - Complete
Naked Desire by Oriana de la Rose reviews
Bella is an art student at Phoenix University when she meets Edward Cullen, also an art major. What happens when they are paired together and assigned to do NUDE MODELING for each other? All human & TONS OF LEMONEY FUN! Over 100,000 hits!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 66,144 - Reviews: 968 - Favs: 1,627 - Follows: 673 - Updated: 4/3/2009 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Complete
Bella Swan or Bella Cullen? by emmy-rulz reviews
Bella's parents die when she is 13 years old. Alice has a vision of her and goes to help. They don't know if they should give her to another family or if she should live with them. Funny things occur when Bella is with Emmett but what happens with Edward?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,326 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 4/2/2009 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Bella, Edward
Come Back Running by AnUnbrokenHorse aka RushtonElf reviews
After a night together Edward leaves Bella stranded in the middle of nowhere and no way to get home. Will Edward leave her at the side of the road for good or will he Come Back Running? All-Human E/B Slightly OCC **Warning Lemon** One-Shot
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,141 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/2/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Broken Wings version 2 by SarcasmicLoser reviews
Charlie abuses bella while hes drunk. bella thinks there is no hope and trys to commit suicide. but edward stops her. she slowly falls in love with him but can she survive? sucky summary but AWSOMESNESS if you click the title. On Hiatus
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,696 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 4/1/2009 - Published: 2/8/2009 - Bella, Edward
Family Game Night by amorphousclouds reviews
The Cullen gang decide, rather force Bella, to do a 'family game' night. Can you guess what game they choose? What's put in Bella's drink? Who will end up naked by the end of the night? EXB JXA EmXR Enjoy.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,358 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 3/31/2009 - Published: 2/6/2009
Just To See Her Blush by x.twilighteclipse reviews
Short humor piece written for a friend. Emmett and Jasper decide to embarrass Bella but, in the end, it's Edward who pulls off the ultimate humiliation. Idea courtesy of LunarEclispe1. Written with her permission.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 759 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 9 - Published: 3/30/2009 - Bella - Complete
TrickorTreat! by shelvis77 reviews
Bella, Alice, Edward, Emmet, and Jasper go trick-or-treating on Halloween. Who will get the most candy? fun, pointless story!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,116 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/28/2009 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Complete
The tiebreaker by vampires rule my world reviews
A sequel to 'The Bet'. Bella and Emmett have made a bet to see who has the most adventurous sex life. Rated M for lemony goodness!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,654 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 183 - Follows: 240 - Updated: 3/27/2009 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Edward, Bella
7 Minutes In Heaven Cullen Edition by SunnySkies4Life reviews
It's sunny outside, and the Cullens and Bella are bored. That is, until Alice had an idea. 7 Minutes In Heaven! Oneshot, not that funny, but I tried! Rated M just in case, but probably could be T.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,213 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 3/27/2009 - Published: 11/23/2008 - Complete
Game night with the cullens by rachelcullen1037 reviews
Carlisle and esme go hunting so what does alice do? Have a party! bella embarks on a journey with edward and the rest of the gang. Includes spin the bottle truth or dare twister etc.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,020 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 3/23/2009 - Published: 3/10/2009 - Edward, Bella
Without The Daddys by greeneyedgirl813 reviews
When Charlie and Carlisle have to leave to go to California to take care of people who have been raped, Bella is left with the rest off the Cullens. What will happen when then Daddys are gone? M 2 be safe.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 893 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 21 - Published: 3/22/2009
Getting What He Deserve! by RavenCullenBabee reviews
Bella catches Edward doing something she couldn't believe. She starts thinking that he don't deserve her, what will Edward do? Okay, summary SUCKS, but this story is awesome! Rated M for lemons, spanking, and sexiness in future chapters!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,336 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 3/22/2009 - Published: 3/15/2009 - Edward, Bella
Truth or Dare Cullen Style by TwihardJess reviews
“Bella, you have never played ‘Truth or Dare Cullen Style’ have you?” Jasper smirked while the rest of the group snickered. “What do you mean Cullen Style?” I looked around and everyone had large grins on there faces.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,371 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 3/22/2009 - Published: 1/11/2009
Itchy by UselessEphiphany26 reviews
Bella has to go to the bathroom- really bad.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 491 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 6 - Published: 3/21/2009 - Bella
Nothing is as it seems by Sophia24 reviews
Bella moves in with her father to a normal quiet neighbourhood but not everything is as it seems. A mysterious, deserted mansion at the end of the street contains secrets that Bella must unravel and a curse that only she can break. Full summary inside.B/E
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,493 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 3/19/2009 - Published: 10/24/2008 - Bella, Edward
Green eyed Stranger by Sophia24 reviews
Bella starts work at a cafe where she meets Edward, her 'green-eyed stranger'. All Human. Full summary inside.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 20,233 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 3/19/2009 - Published: 8/25/2008 - Bella, Edward
Explorations by Summer Leah reviews
Bella is shocked when Edward suddenly agrees to try sex. M for later chapters.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 21,662 - Reviews: 319 - Favs: 299 - Follows: 303 - Updated: 3/17/2009 - Published: 1/20/2009 - Bella, Edward
Winter Fun Well just Bella on Ice But by oodlesofdoodles reviews
It's Winter in Forks and the Cullens have a surprise for Bella. ICE SKATING! Along the way she will see Jasper and Emmett playing hockey, and and Rosalie being abnormally gracefull, and learn a secret about Edward. WARNING: a not so perfect Edward.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,890 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 3/16/2009 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Bella, Edward
LUST, LUCK and LOVE? by katie-masen reviews
My mind took me to three nights ago, the first time Bella and I had sex. She was 3 years younger and had a body to die for. Edward x Bella....LEMON
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,179 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 3/16/2009 - Published: 11/21/2008 - Edward, Bella
Love wouldnt be blind if braille wasnt so much fun by mrsedwardcullen73ca reviews
When bella is hurt, can edward help pull her through. Rated M in case of later chapters. Please read and review.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,828 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 3/15/2009 - Published: 1/28/2009
Everybody Scream by theStarvingArtist reviews
It's Halloween time in Forks, and everyone's out to scare, but what happens when a serious prankster targets Bella? Who is it? And what does he want? R&R. CONTINUING EVEN THOUGH ITS NOT HALLOWEEN.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 6,764 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 3/13/2009 - Published: 10/24/2008 - Bella, Edward
Bella, the Vibrator, and the Swivel Chair by ToKiEmOkIe reviews
*One-Shot* A Sexualy Frustrated Bella Has problems coping with Edward being in Japan. What happens when he makes a surprise return? I like it sour....that means there's Lemons lol.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,081 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 234 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 3/11/2009 - Published: 2/18/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Delightful Dessert by UselessEphiphany26 reviews
Something is makeing Bella moan. But it's not Edward. Funny.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 886 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 5 - Published: 3/9/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Wild and Wacky Adventures of Edward in PE! by LindaRoo reviews
Hilarity ensues when Edward comes back at the end of New Moon and he and Alice get Mrs. Cope to change their schedules to put them in Bella's gym class. How can they appear human when their superhuman athletic aptitudes keep getting in the way?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 12 - Words: 74,371 - Reviews: 1984 - Favs: 2,232 - Follows: 1,685 - Updated: 3/9/2009 - Published: 2/27/2007
Don't let him by aliblewaunicorn reviews
Charlie is an abusive drunk. What happens after Edward Enters Bella's life? Will she finnaly make the right dicision? Will Edward turn her away, or will he help her throught this crisis? Please review! Edward & Bella
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 2,463 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 3/9/2009 - Published: 7/2/2008 - Bella, Edward
Meant for You! by bellaswancullen reviews
We are no longer in the same time as the books. Bella is now a slave, and was bought by the Cullen Family. Watch as Bella and Edward learn about each other, and see what will happen with their future. Will they ever be together? Read & find out. R&R Pleas
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 15 - Words: 16,286 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 3/7/2009 - Published: 12/23/2007
Truth or dare: twilight style R&R! by ttwilighttlover101 reviews
READ THIS STORY. a fun story about truth or dare, funny and entertaining. takes place the summer after twilight. read and review please!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,275 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 2/28/2009 - Published: 9/16/2008
Time and Time Again by ILOVEJAMES3 reviews
Bella's old friends from Phoenix come down and hang out with the Cullens. Very funny! Please review
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 13,700 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 2/27/2009 - Published: 5/18/2008
Emmetts History by SparklieEdwardOmg reviews
Emmetts history lesson Funny R&R
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 457 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 2/26/2009 - Published: 2/21/2009 - Emmett, Rosalie
Forbidden by catching.thebutterfly reviews
Bella is the troubled student, Edward is the teacher who notices and forbidden love blossoms. The story is AU, AH and is OOC. Cannon pairings and rated M for some difficult subject matter and adult themes.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 42,284 - Reviews: 361 - Favs: 238 - Follows: 286 - Updated: 2/25/2009 - Published: 2/8/2009 - Edward, Bella
Sex, Lies and Online Dating by indigenousbleu reviews
Set in New Moon. 2 months after Edward leaves Bella decides she needs to do something. Online Dating. Under the name of MARIE she meets ANTHONY.She likes him but little does she know its really Edward. GIVE IT A SHOT! ExB !Now Co Written with sylamesio123
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 7 - Words: 3,018 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 128 - Updated: 2/21/2009 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Bella, Edward
Sleep Talker by Pepper96 reviews
Bella hangs out at the Cullen house where she falls asleep. The Cullens besides Edward are fascinated to discover that Bella talks in her sleep. Takes place post-Twilight, pre-New Moon. No longer a one-shot, will now be Cullen family moments!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 779 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 2/20/2009 - Published: 2/19/2009 - Emmett
A La Emmett by Nixxii-Cullen reviews
The Cullen's get 'The Talk' A La Emmett - The Sexual Deviant that he is ---- Renesmee's talk now added !
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,342 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 2/15/2009 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Emmett
Bowling With Vampires by vampirebites95 reviews
Bella and the Cullens decide to go bowling a little bit before the wedding. Emmet goes over the top, there are some crazy arcade games, and much more to go wrong. Hopefully MOSTLY funny. Some parts just cute. Bella and Edward. I suck at summaries.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,142 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 2/15/2009 - Published: 5/3/2008
A Cullen Truth or Dareness Type Dealio by Obsessivegeekybuffalosnowcones reviews
Another Cullen truth or dare. I thought it would be funny so please read and review. Lot's of OOCness. DISCLAIMER: I obviously do not own Twilight
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 6,277 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 2/11/2009 - Published: 2/8/2009 - Angela, Edward - Complete
Streptococcal Sore Throat by Esme Plutonian reviews
Fluffy. Bella gets sick and Edward takes care of her, but then her sore throat gets a little more serious when Carlisle examines her thoroughly. Who knew losing your tonsils could be so much fun? Set before Eclipse. 'T' for safety.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,650 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 2/11/2009 - Published: 2/10/2009 - Complete
Distractions by best with breadsticks reviews
ONESHOT While Edward is off on a hunting trip, Bella attempts to distract herself with some fun and interesting home videos on the Internet. And thus her journey on Youtube begins.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,761 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/7/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Broken Wings version 1 by IHeartEdwardCullen14 reviews
charlie is an abusive drunk, bella meets edward while he's trying to convince her not to commit suisidde. they fall in love but can it survive
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,320 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 2/7/2009 - Published: 2/2/2009 - Bella, Edward
Beer, Pornstars, Sex and Tequila by iconicdoxi reviews
Bella wants one more human experience. She wants to get drunk. And she plans on doing so with or without Edwards approval, will the Cullens step up to help their little sister out? Obviously Emmett's in, but that's a given.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,504 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 18 - Published: 2/4/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Cullen's trip to WalMart by Paranoid Pessimist reviews
The Cullens move to a new town in Montana and decide to let the people there know that the Cullen Family is in town... by playing pranks in Wal-mart. This is about 70 years after Bella has been married to ewdard and changed into a vampire. R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 10,078 - Reviews: 407 - Favs: 253 - Follows: 224 - Updated: 2/3/2009 - Published: 5/15/2008
Live Your Life by limella reviews
Bella is in a class with a buch of imature freaks. Edward moves to town and they become fast friends, he sticks up for her from the boys that make fun of her. When summer comes, what happens when she takes a walk in the woods and finds Edward? *ALL HUMAN*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,357 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 2/1/2009 - Published: 1/22/2009 - Bella, Edward
Bring the Kleenex, 'cause there's gonna be tears by Shawdee reviews
Edward's gone hunting and Bella's bored as ever. The pack are her only hope of survival on these dreaded days. They suggest truth or dare. What will happen when Edward and his family come back and are asked to join the fun? DISCONTINUED
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,471 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 1/31/2009 - Published: 1/27/2009
What does Emmett say? by Anomaly-Anomaly reviews
Story is still up purely because I need to beta.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 6,832 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 1/29/2009 - Published: 8/11/2008 - Complete
Edward And Bella In All There Lemony Goodness by BOWL.MAN reviews
Bella Try's To Trick Edward In To Sleeping With Her Bits Of Fluff And Lots Of Lemon In Last Chapter What Will Bella Do To Try And Seduce Edward? Maybe an Odd Shopping Trip Or An Uncomfortable Conversation You'll Have To Read To Find Out First Lemon R&R
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,508 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 1/26/2009 - Published: 1/24/2009 - Edward, Bella
At the Cullen's by jellycakes reviews
Short take on Edward and Bella's first time sex and Bella becoming a vampire. Contains yummy lemons. Enjoy
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,640 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 48 - Updated: 1/26/2009 - Published: 9/26/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Bet by vampires rule my world reviews
Bella and Emmett make a bet with each other to see who has the most 'adventurous' sex life. Rated M for lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,930 - Reviews: 200 - Favs: 357 - Follows: 142 - Updated: 1/25/2009 - Published: 1/7/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Emmett's hambuger phone by bananasofdeath reviews
On a lazy Sunday, Bella cannot find Emmett. What is he up to this time?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 455 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 6 - Published: 1/20/2009 - Complete
The Seductress by RegenSayoo reviews
When Bella is feeling like her sex life is becoming repetitive, Alice and Rosalie provide her a 'schedule' of new things to try in the bedroom with Edward. Rated for lemons. THOUGH THIS IS NOT FINISHED, I CANNOT CONTINUE WITH IT. SORRY GUYS.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,289 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 1/20/2009 - Published: 1/11/2009 - Bella, Edward
Say a Pray for Me by wolf-grl2008 reviews
Rosalie has a hard time opening up to Emmett then hears him in his room. "I just want Heaven for her Lord." Emmett/ Rosalie oneshot
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,766 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/17/2009 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
Lifeless by dress up romance xx reviews
AU. Bella was kidnapped when she was five years old. From that point on, she has been forced to work as a sex slave. Everything before thislife has been completely forgotten. Fifteen years later, Bella is asked to 'service' Edward's 21st birthday party.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,787 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 198 - Follows: 410 - Updated: 1/17/2009 - Published: 12/22/2008 - Bella, Edward
Love aint so sweet by twilite4eva reviews
cut it short bella gets drunk...does edward take advantage of this?...how far will he go to get bella back Rated M 4 future X lemony X chapters enjoy!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 510 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Published: 1/17/2009
Let The Truth Begin by luvemmett reviews
Next time it's Truth or Truth,' Emmett said as he slammed his door shut...well he wasn't lying. After they all got busted for Dare or Dare, Emmett's ready for the next round...what will happen this time? *Sequel to Let The Games Begin*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 8,092 - Reviews: 526 - Favs: 218 - Follows: 163 - Updated: 1/17/2009 - Published: 12/3/2008 - Complete
Emmett and Truth or Dare What Could Go Wrong? by RandomCullenFanGirl1901 reviews
When Emmett decides to play truth or dare, the Cullen clan is wrapped up in their crazy brother's game. Hilarity ensues, and no one is safe. My summaries suck... Rated T due to extreme paranoia. Canon pairings. Takes place Post Eclipse but Pre BD. REVIEW!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,586 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 1/17/2009 - Published: 12/28/2008 - Emmett
Tie Her Down by xlovexlustx reviews
One Shot for the Dirty Talking Edward Contest held by Isabel0329, LeechLover85 and moon.witche. BxE, AU, AH, OOC. Bella wears a provacative outifit to school to get Edward's attention, what will his reaction be? M for very graphic sex scenes and swearing.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,586 - Reviews: 266 - Favs: 1,329 - Follows: 342 - Updated: 1/16/2009 - Published: 10/6/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Christmas with the Cullens by xTwilightxChickx reviews
Bella spends a crazy Christmas at the Cullen house. Harrassment from Emmett, fun times with shopping addict Alice, parties, presents, and more fun stuff.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,632 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 1/16/2009 - Published: 12/20/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Things that Alcohol do by piece-of-cake13 reviews
Edward and Jasper go hunting and Alice and Emmett decide it's time to have some FUN with Bella! What will happen? Co written with all-things-nice
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,718 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/16/2009 - Bella, Emmett
Winter Sky Part 1 Rosalie's POV by MrsTarantino666x reviews
A romantic getaway for Rosalie & Emmett is halted by a dramatic incident which changes their lives forever ...
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,718 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/15/2009 - Rosalie, Emmett
Truth or Dare? by Insanity4Free reviews
Bella and Edward play a game of Truth or Dare....Chaos follows
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 948 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 1/15/2009 - Published: 12/23/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
A Winter's Night by Head-First-Fearless reviews
A submission to the SMC contest! Bella and Edward find themselves in the mountains on their senior ski trip. It's the last place Bella wants to be. Sex is the bane of their relationship. Will it result in warmth or ice? Lemon. AU/AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,042 - Reviews: 73 - Favs: 153 - Follows: 25 - Published: 1/14/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Heaven Forbid by Stephy08 reviews
Bella lives with Charlie an abusive drunk who beats Bella daily. What happens when the Edward Masen and his family move in next door. Will he find out her secret? -All Human-
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,364 - Reviews: 224 - Favs: 176 - Follows: 287 - Updated: 1/10/2009 - Published: 2/4/2008 - Bella, Edward
Strange reaction by When We Stand Together reviews
Bella and Edward share an evening together and Edward is acting strange
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,774 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/9/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Myths by Merlin4100 reviews
Bella is hard-pressed to believe in surreal tales, but when she finds a hurt, blood-covered stranger in her apartment at night, she's less scared of him, than of not being able to help him.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 9 - Words: 21,439 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 1/8/2009 - Published: 11/29/2008 - Bella, Edward
Total Eclipse of the Heart by ashel-13 reviews
Actress Bella Swan has been getting mysterious letters making her enlist the aide of body guard, Edward Cullen. But will he do more than protect her body? She finds there's more to the SWAT officer than meeets the eye, and wants him all the more. OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 161,936 - Reviews: 4243 - Favs: 4,084 - Follows: 1,737 - Updated: 1/7/2009 - Published: 7/18/2008 - Complete
Edward is a WHAT? by JackieWackie reviews
This is a spin off of the original story. Bella Swan has a twin brother, who is homosexual. This story is meant to be funny and the characters may be a little - well out of character. Bella, who is the older of the two, is very flirty and VERY protective.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,644 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 1/5/2009 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Bella, Edward
A Cullen Christmas by undecidable reviews
This is a story written by my sister of the Cullens at Christmas with some good ol' fanshioned truth or dare.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,989 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Complete
Embarrassed by EmilsEliza reviews
One day when Bella is over at the Cullen’s house they get to talking about some of their most embarrassing moments. Will the Cullen family be able to keep from laughing at each other or will they end up too embarrassed?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 18,535 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 83 - Updated: 1/3/2009 - Published: 6/4/2008
My Awakening by PaigeMariexoxo reviews
One day, Bella begs Edward to tell her about his "new birth." Edward tells the story of his hilarious awakening to the new world. And eventually, Bella learns of the other's awakenings. OOC. Full of funny surprises!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 680 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 1/3/2009 - Published: 1/2/2009 - Edward, Carlisle
Switch by WinndSinger reviews
A magical prank causes Edward and Bella to switch bodies, then as a cure is trying to be found by Carlisle, lots of switches take place throughout the house. This is a fun story, try it out.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 29,832 - Reviews: 262 - Favs: 363 - Follows: 338 - Updated: 1/2/2009 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Edward, Bella
Emmett demonstrates a way of 'wooing' Bella? by lazywriter2009 reviews
Emmett heard the new song Can I Have this Dance and wants Edward to sing it to Bella! but, is this just singing or a charade game to Emmett?
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,248 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 12/26/2008 - Emmett - Complete
Emmett's Revenge by softball-chica reviews
Sequel to Bella's Thoughts. How will Emmett exact his revenge on the rest of the Cullens? Read to find out.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,283 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 12/31/2008 - Published: 11/26/2008
Hero by sincere red reviews
bella a 10 year old girl loses her parents to a murderer and was sent to an orphanage. 6 and a half years later she gets adopted by the Cullens. There she meets Edward Masen. Can he save her from her past or is it too late. Usual pairings AH
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,430 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 12/30/2008 - Published: 10/14/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Day Emmett goes Shopping by youbroughtasnack reviews
Alice gets sick and decides that Emmett should shop for her uh oh
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,260 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 12/30/2008 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Emmett
Notes by Llama Mama23 reviews
Edward and Bella are caught passing notes in class. The teacher has the note read to the class. A series of embarassing events ensues, including Edward in a trunk, Bella in a gas mask, Carlisle as Tarazn, and Emmett with blue hair.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 25,990 - Reviews: 2872 - Favs: 2,057 - Follows: 974 - Updated: 12/29/2008 - Published: 5/14/2007 - Complete
Christmas by Dr. Harleen Quinzel03 reviews
Kinda Sequel to Halloween. Bella and the Cullens celebrate the season. The girls tease the boys, Emmett get's Bella drunk, Edward wants to Kill him, Bella wants Edward to be with her. Fun ensuses at the Cullens...not to mention PRESENTS! Please R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 7,129 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 12/27/2008 - Published: 12/19/2008 - Complete
Fun with the Cullens by DeadlyPrecious reviews
Ok so just some random fun with the cullens! example for my contest!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,524 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 12/26/2008 - Published: 11/14/2008
Under One Condition by Pyromaniac2009 reviews
Bella's variation to the condition of she and Edward having sex. "Under one Condition: In my room at the house, on the bed not the couch, and Carlisle there incase i need him to get me off before i bite you" Bella:"Ok for begging and middle, no go on last
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 9,178 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 84 - Updated: 12/25/2008 - Published: 4/28/2008
Emmett, Jasper Edward Bella, anda light switch? by CrazedTwilighter reviews
My last minute Christmas present to all of you! A prank of Cullen proportions! Enjoy! XOXOX
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 993 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 7 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Emmett, Edward
Closets and Love Notes by Aisling-91 reviews
Oneshot: When Alice makes Bella try and find a box at her brothers appartment, Bella realizes her long time secret love - Edward Cullen - may share the same feelings towards her. Fluff lemon, AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,154 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 219 - Follows: 25 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Bella and the cullens play truth or dare
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 347 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 64 - Updated: 12/23/2008 - Published: 11/28/2008
a different side by haylzee reviews
a Emmett/Rosalie one shot, showing a different side to Rosalie, her softer side.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,226 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
Emmett's Proposal To Rosalie by kellykiley02 reviews
This is how I imagined Emmett's proposal to Rosalie. Please R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 414 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Complete
Twilight Characters Powers by Rebecca a.k.a Mrs. Jasper Hale reviews
A list of the special powers that the characters of Twilight posess.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 515 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/19/2008 - Complete
Why didn't I learn the first time? by Emmett-Cullen-Lova-01 reviews
Sequel to Truth or Dare- Supposed to be funny. What happens when you mix the cullens in for a second truth or dare game? ABSOLUTE chaos. DONT have to read first one to understand, but it's funnier if you do. Enjoy.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,655 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 12/17/2008 - Published: 11/25/2008
Battle of the Sexes: Cullen Style by desvulalleb reviews
Carlisle brings home the game, “Battle of the Sexes”. Chaos ensues. Bella is about to learn why you never mix a family of bored vampires with a game that, "encourages sexism", to quote Emmett. BellaxEdward; one-shot; my first story; T for humor
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 270 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/10/2008
Oh What a Night by mirannon reviews
WELL! Bella has a steamy dream about Edward... How will he react? Can you smell lemons? And what if Charlie interrupts? Please R/R, First Fan Fict!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,823 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 12/8/2008 - Published: 11/28/2008 - Bella, Edward
Dream job by vampyre-freak reviews
its 1810 in Glouster and bella is going to work as a maid for the Cullens the story is better than it sounds, or so i'm told! when i say phoned him i dont mean mobile phone i mean the crappy ones lol
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,067 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 12/7/2008 - Published: 7/6/2008 - Bella, Edward
A night to remember by Sophia24 reviews
Edward and Bella are forced to go to a club together. Bella gets drunk and reveals how she feels about Edward. What will happen when they spend the night alone together? 'M' for lemon in the third chapter...will be a three-shot! All human!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,632 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 12/6/2008 - Published: 11/26/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Call Me A Fox by BookObsessed21 reviews
Jasper and his brother Edward knew Bella back in high school; she was the girl Edward lived to torment. Years later, Bella runs into Jasper and his girlfriend Alice. What will Edward have to do with anything and who is this new girl at the gym? AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,592 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 12/4/2008 - Published: 9/13/2008
I Dare You by Cullens the name.Dani Cullen reviews
Crazy game of Truth or Dare with the Cullens, The Humans, and The Dogs. Many things happen on this crazy night. Edward's nakedness, post-it notes, and lots of laughs. R&R. :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,310 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 12/4/2008 - Published: 5/22/2008
The Jasmettisle and Jedward Arrive by Carlisle'sPetiteDefenseur reviews
Sequel to Drunk Bella,Dust Bunnies,and Jasmettisle's?This is what happens when the Jasmettisle and Jedward arrive at the Cullen house.Bella is completely confused and Alice is ecstatic!I suck at summaries.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 645 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 6 - Published: 12/2/2008 - Bella
Drunk Bella,Dust Bunnies,and Jasmettisle's by Carlisle'sPetiteDefenseur reviews
Bella gets drunk because of Emmett. Hilarity ensues and strange things happen. R&R? :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,482 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/1/2008 - Complete
Countdown by JustCallMeBella reviews
Countdown to Edward and Bella’s blossoming romance. All Human.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,276 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 12/1/2008 - Published: 11/3/2008
Setting The Table by ashel-13 reviews
Oneshot. All Human. Lemon. Bella and Edward celebrate their first Thanksgiving together as a married couple. Co-written by HaydenMCullen and ashel-13.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,766 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 435 - Follows: 79 - Published: 11/29/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Bella's Thoughts by softball-chica reviews
We all know that Edward is desperate to know what Bella is thinking, but what happens when he starts hearing snippets in biology? Will he like what he hears?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 19,174 - Reviews: 200 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 11/28/2008 - Published: 7/27/2008 - Edward, Bella
Bella and Chocolate by XoXsweetbloodXoX reviews
Bella on her period......what happens?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,694 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 16 - Published: 11/26/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Cullens Ringtones by DeadlyPrecious reviews
has bd charactors. really random but funny ringtones for the cullens
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 360 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 3 - Published: 11/26/2008 - Complete
Camping trip by Nayame reviews
Bellas friends ask her if she's in for a camping trip. Alice, Emmet and Edward are coming, too - let the fun begin! With this constellation, no one knows what will happen next... Contains major fluff and the characters aren't too ooc
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 85,890 - Reviews: 419 - Favs: 289 - Follows: 260 - Updated: 11/21/2008 - Published: 5/19/2007
You do NOT Mess with Emmett's Sister by Symeria reviews
Kellan Lutz Our awesome Emmett! said it best, "Emmett's the protector. He's the guy that's there to crack jokes then beat somebody up." Bella is grateful that Emmett will be her brother in a few weeks. Emmett and Bella brother/sister bonding fic
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,408 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 293 - Follows: 36 - Published: 11/15/2008 - Emmett, Bella - Complete
The Cullen’s Moments of Randomness by twilight782 reviews
The Cullens have always been quite a stange family, besides the fact theat they are vampires. Now their most embarresing, weird, and craziest moments are revieled in these chpters of petrifyingly funny stories!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 14,605 - Reviews: 145 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 11/12/2008 - Published: 7/21/2007
Detention by SUPER AMAZING reviews
The much requested sequel to Biology Notes. Edward feels Bella owes him after that Biology class, will Bella return the favour?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,640 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 203 - Follows: 42 - Published: 11/10/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Campus Liaisons by Isabel0329 reviews
Bella Swan starts her first semester as an English professor with just the right thing – a one night stand. But what happens when that one night stand shows up in the most unexpected place? All-human, OOC. Rated M for language and sex.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 45,079 - Reviews: 2702 - Favs: 3,680 - Follows: 1,718 - Updated: 11/7/2008 - Published: 8/22/2008 - Bella - Complete
Emmett gets bella drunk by GreekgodEdward reviews
Summary: Edward goes on a hunting trip to Canada with his family and leaves Emmett babysitting Bella, but what will happen when Emmett wants to have fun with her? rated T just in case
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 10,743 - Reviews: 189 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 11/7/2008 - Published: 11/27/2007
Midnight Kiss by PENNYxLANExCULLEN reviews
A night alone with Edward in the empty Cullen house!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 25,825 - Reviews: 376 - Favs: 321 - Follows: 312 - Updated: 10/27/2008 - Published: 5/14/2008
BubbleGum Champion by Heartbroken1 reviews
FINAL CHAPTER IS NOW UP...Edward discovers that Bella has a talent he didn't know about. He should have never told his brothers about it. Let the teasing begin. I changed the rating to M... still only innuendoes.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,431 - Reviews: 672 - Favs: 465 - Follows: 337 - Updated: 10/25/2008 - Published: 10/26/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Weekend at the Cullens by iliketwilightmorethanyou reviews
Bella just wanted some alone time with Edward over the weekend. Emmett and Jasper just wanted to pull a prank on their brother and Bella, but what happens when the prank goes terribly wrong? Read to find out! --- Dont judge a story by its summary ;
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,022 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 10/19/2008 - Published: 10/15/2008 - Edward, Bella
Operation Kiss Rosalie by LaPaige reviews
Emmett and Rosalie make a bet. Can Emmett get Rosalie to kiss him within four hours? Operation Kiss Rosalie is a go. EmmettRosalie.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,644 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 6 - Published: 10/19/2008 - Rosalie, Emmett - Complete
Embarrassment With The Cullens by On An Edge reviews
Title says it all. Emmett with drums, Edward in health class, things can only go wrong.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,935 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 10/19/2008 - Published: 3/25/2008
Costume Shopping Can be fun by ihavefoundmyedward2010 reviews
Edward, Bella, Jacob, and Nessie all go costume shopping. It now comes down to who will be what.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 798 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/11/2008
Dualism by Isabel0329 reviews
Edward asks Bella series of questions that is soon followed by a night that she will never forget. All-Human, extremely OOC. Rated M for extreme lemons! Part of Jayeliwood's Sexy Edward contest.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,383 - Reviews: 256 - Favs: 1,099 - Follows: 225 - Updated: 10/8/2008 - Published: 8/26/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Joy of Graduation by jeaniebeanie245 reviews
Bella's highschool graduation. Emmett, Jasper, and Bella play a huge prank! HILARIOUS! please REVIEW!:
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 318 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 12 - Published: 10/5/2008 - Bella, Emmett - Complete
What happens in Walmart stays in Walmart! by tamponlovesedward1848 reviews
What happenes when the cullen take bella to wal-mart to play truth or dare? read to find out the more you review the faster ill update!my first story please go easy on me!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,414 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 10/5/2008 - Published: 3/31/2008
Bella's fun by Shaina Angel Peh reviews
Bella's a vampire and married to edward. what does she do when shes bored. Now Complete!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 737 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 9/29/2008 - Published: 9/26/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
To Live Without Love by EsmeGirl reviews
Just something I thought would be fun to write. Its about how bella finds an old diary that edward wrote all through his human life.read and reveiw! please!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,772 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/27/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Edward and 'The Talk' by swimminglvr reviews
Some point before Edward and Bella get it on, Edward asks Carlisle, Emmett, and Jasper about their 'personal experiences' with the D. Go through the humiliation of Edward's first sex talk, and the many unfortunate ones after...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,483 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 9/27/2008 - Published: 9/3/2008 - Edward
Heatwave by Ruby-Wednesday reviews
When an unexpected Heatwave hits Forks, it allows Edward and Bella to leave their problems behind and have some fun! Set between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn. Now Complete!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 39 - Words: 109,924 - Reviews: 4879 - Favs: 3,106 - Follows: 1,569 - Updated: 9/27/2008 - Published: 1/4/2008 - Complete
Mikes World! by CheyanneMarie reviews
Mike try to impress Bella, she gets annoyed and the Cullens decided to get him. a little embarrassment for him couldn't hurt could it? First story, please be nice, little OOC. 1st chp isnt that good, but it gets BETTER, I PROMISE, all you do is R&R, PLEAZ
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 88,573 - Reviews: 362 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 151 - Updated: 9/18/2008 - Published: 4/10/2008
Bella's Afraid of What? by liberal4peace reviews
Emmett finds some of Bella's old school papers....
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 288 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 10 - Published: 9/15/2008 - Complete
Mr Bright Eyes by Katie Holla Queen reviews
Bella moves to Florida after her dad dies and starts to fall for one of her teacher assistants, Edward. Chaos and lemons are sure to follow. AU/AH BxE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,916 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 139 - Updated: 9/8/2008 - Published: 8/13/2008 - Bella, Edward
Oh Shiet by AliceTheVampire reviews
A funny script featuring The charectors of Twilight! More to come!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,041 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 9/7/2008 - Published: 10/27/2007
What Were You Dreaming About? by Edward Cullen brings sexy back reviews
Bella has a dream about Edward. Will Edward make it come true. Lemony fun 1 shot
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,388 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 8 - Published: 9/6/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Birthday Surprise by Morine123 reviews
Daddy Edward and Mommy Bella! It's Edward's birthday and Renesmee and Bella have a surprise for him!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,994 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 15 - Published: 9/3/2008 - Complete
Babysitting by runaway xo reviews
All Human! Bella is stuck babysitting the devil himself, when she notices a strange color in the corner of a sliding glass door. "It was a strange auburn color, almost brick-like, but not as dull." AU. B/E. One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,606 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 64 - Published: 9/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Sex Education by vampirekisses1901 reviews
The one embarrassing lesson we all have to have. Only Bella has to have it with Edward... Used to be a one-shot but I think it may be a couple of chapters. GUYS I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T UDATED. I'VE JUST...FORGOTTEN ABOUT IT lol.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,783 - Reviews: 176 - Favs: 86 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 8/31/2008 - Published: 3/22/2008 - Edward, Bella
Twilight: The Early Years by Alice-MyMagic8Ball reviews
Um, this is based before Bella came into town and is just a couple of funny stories of The Cullens :D Please. please read.. I can't write summaries...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,955 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 8/31/2008 - Published: 8/3/2008 - Edward, Alice
The Other Cullen by Charming101 reviews
My full name is Hayden Michael Cullen and I should not be alive. Vampires are unable to conceive which is why all of my siblings are adopted, however my existence is a different story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 70,949 - Reviews: 572 - Favs: 242 - Follows: 116 - Updated: 8/30/2008 - Published: 5/21/2008 - Complete
Girlfriend by Jamillia reviews
Emmett's just been shown youtube. What is about to happen?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,602 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/29/2008 - Emmett, Bella - Complete
Permission by Isabel0329 reviews
Sequel to Dualism. Rules are defined, patience is tested, and Bella finds relief. Rated M for language and extreme lemons. AU, All-Human. Extremely OOC. Be warned!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,847 - Reviews: 261 - Favs: 651 - Follows: 365 - Published: 8/29/2008 - Edward, Bella
Edward's Twilight by JasperHaleRox reviews
This is the entire book Twilight, only it's in Edward's point of view.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,307 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 8/29/2008 - Published: 7/24/2007
10 Steps To Seducing Your Hot Virgin Vampire BF by halojones reviews
This story starts off after Edward rebuffs Bella's modest advances in their newly acquired bed in Edward's room. But things take a turn for the better for these two lovesick kids when Alice takes things into her own hands. Never bet against Alice!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 92,432 - Reviews: 5147 - Favs: 2,991 - Follows: 1,459 - Updated: 8/28/2008 - Published: 3/4/2008 - Complete
Lust and Blood the morning after by fifi-fictionalize reviews
Sequel to Lust & Blood. Lemon/s to come, still in progress. What happens the morning after Bella and Edward cross their boundaries? Rated M. Hope you enjoy.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,241 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 120 - Updated: 8/27/2008 - Published: 7/15/2008 - Bella, Edward
One Beating Heart by riverbelle reviews
Yesterday's headlines tragic car crash kills 2, 18month old daughter missing. Today's headlines, missing girl found local doctor plans to adopt. The Cullen's life changes the day a tragic crash brings a little girl Bella into their lives. first timer XD
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 13 - Words: 23,393 - Reviews: 206 - Favs: 185 - Follows: 234 - Updated: 8/26/2008 - Published: 6/27/2008 - Bella, Edward
Sex dreams by ATEMDAC reviews
what happens when Bella is babysat by emmett and jasper and she starts talking in her sleep........ funny little thing I felt like writing. hope you enjoy:D
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,197 - Reviews: 184 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 82 - Published: 8/23/2008 - Emmett, Bella
Voyeuristic Tendencies by Rosette-Cullen reviews
Edward catches Bella is a very compromising situation, which leads to a bit more than simple voyeurism. ExB Smut, Smut, Smut... but very fun smut.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,719 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 228 - Follows: 65 - Published: 8/23/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Dirty Talking Edward by ATEMDAC reviews
what happens when Bella is bored and tries to talk Edward into dirty talking with her through notes in Biology----This Does! first FanFic please don't clober me. Lemons, be warned!one-shot....maybe, not sure.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,630 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 36 - Published: 8/23/2008 - Bella, Edward
Sex & Candy by Katie Holla Queen reviews
Bella waits for Edward and the boys to come home after a hunt, she gets hungry, and a lemon. BxE.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,442 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 8/22/2008 - Published: 7/9/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
A Fresh Start by twilighter1357 reviews
New English teacher Edward has discovered that his student Bella is being abused by Charlie. He volunteers to let her stay with him in his home and to counsel her. Will sparks fly or will the student/teacher relationship to too much to overcome? All Human
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,328 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 104 - Updated: 8/22/2008 - Published: 8/17/2008
Edward and the Electric Slide by Matt-On-Matt reviews
Edward is bored in P.E. and decides to spy on Bella by going through Mikes mind. Edward comes up with a plan to get back at Mike. Bella has a plan of her own. BXE. Lemon, lots of it later. My interpretation of the characters not yours so get over it. R&R.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,094 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 8/20/2008 - Published: 5/17/2008
Edward And Rob by NikiRadcliffe reviews
Bella finds out Edward has a... twin brother!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,212 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 18 - Published: 8/20/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Gaity of Edward Cullen by lucytheslut reviews
a little while ago, i saw a display picture that made me laugh, it said "until Bella moved to forks, we all thought he was gay" this is a story based on that display pic, AU/All Human. COMPLETE! strong T for innuendos
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 15,551 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 8/19/2008 - Published: 7/7/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Emmettlicious by its not you its me reviews
Emmett being himself while he thinks he's alone.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 407 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/18/2008 - Emmett - Complete
Emmett's Gift To Edward and Bella by hopelessromantic007 reviews
Emmett decides that since Edward and Bella are engaged he should give them a gift. It's something only Emmett would consider giving.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,025 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/16/2008 - Emmett, Bella - Complete
Bouncing Bags of Floury Joy by x.Twilight-Freak reviews
One of Emmett's jokes at school goes wrong, and now all of the younger Cullens plus Bella have to pay for it in the principal's waccky version of family living. Who's paired with who?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,524 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 8/14/2008 - Published: 8/13/2008
12 Years Old by tvrc reviews
Bella and Edward are 12, they go to the same school and have major crushes on each other. When Bella gets dared to ask Edward to the school dance, what will happen?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,770 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 8/13/2008 - Published: 1/28/2008
Favorite Things by best with breadsticks reviews
ONESHOT Bella is trying to get to the bottom of Edward's favorite things, but he's not going to let her have all the fun.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,212 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/11/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Riddles by runaway xo reviews
Riddles are always fun, but what happens when the jokes relate to vampires? Fluff of course! Pre-Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,507 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 35 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Complete
The Talk by Ellenedwardforever reviews
In Eclipse when Charlie has the sex talk with Bella. Edward eavesdrops. Read and review! Edward's POV. Oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 752 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 23 - Published: 8/10/2008 - Emmett, Edward - Complete
Sex And Vampires by Daddy's Little Cannibal reviews
The summary is NOT fanfiction appropriate. You'll have to read it in the first chapter. This is the long awaited replacement for When Life Gives You Lemons - not a sequel or a rewrite. BXE Filled with lemony goodness and a plot. Complete.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 32,605 - Reviews: 1657 - Favs: 1,336 - Follows: 832 - Updated: 8/9/2008 - Published: 6/5/2008 - Bella, Edward
She Was In Deep by poisonedbirth reviews
Chaos ensues when Bella is attacked by a drunk, but this time, she attacks back! What will happen? What will the Cullens do? And what exactly is Mike doing here? Set after Eclipse. Give it a shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 13,464 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 8/7/2008 - Published: 6/13/2008 - Bella - Complete
Emmett's Birthday Bash by Jaspers lil pixie77 reviews
Emmett celebrates his birthday in extremely extravagant Emmett style! A PARTY! But what he has in store for the Cullens is what everyone least expected!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,610 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 8/5/2008 - Published: 7/21/2008
It's a Surprise by Hanna Rae reviews
Edward takes Bella on a date, but what surprises does he have for her? Lemony.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,942 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/4/2008 - Published: 7/31/2008 - Complete
PRANKS by Twihard275 reviews
Its the day of pranks over at the cullens and what happens when bella is stuck in the middle?
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 23,991 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 8/3/2008 - Published: 5/11/2008 - Complete
A weekend with Emmett by Lustforbloodxx reviews
What happends when Edward and the rest of the cullens leave Bella with Emmett for a weekend?Tip:Never let Emmett cook,Ever!:DRated T-just in case
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,380 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 8/3/2008 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Emmett, Bella
StudentTeacher Relationships by treblemaker11 reviews
Edward never came back in New Moon, well, he did, but he found Bella somewhat happy with Jacob. Five years later, Bella begins teaching, and you can guess who she has in her class : Rated T to be save
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,159 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 8/1/2008 - Published: 7/28/2008 - Bella, Edward
Honey,This Bed Isn't Big Enough For The 4 Of Us by 4EverAndEver reviews
When Edward catches Bella cheating and dumps her, how will he cope with the depression? Will new loves spark? Will enemies become loves? Many Raunchy lemons, lots of sex combinations, R&R!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,493 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 7/30/2008 - Published: 7/28/2008
New Pajamas by booknerd3000 reviews
Edward buys Bella some sexy new pjs. Could they be a little too sexy? Rated T for sexual content -smiles- no lemon, the're still only engaged
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,031 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 7/29/2008 - Published: 7/15/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Volvo by Nature.Calls reviews
Edward and Bella manage to stop traffic.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,031 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 10 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Predator's Smile by FormerWriter reviews
Bella's tired of being stared at by the creepy kid, Edward. But what can she do? Rated M for possible future lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 9,942 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 7/29/2008 - Published: 5/31/2008
Yes, Please by Coquettishness reviews
COMPLETE. One-shot. While out of town, Bella devises a way to finally seduce the ever virtuous Edward – with a little help from an unexpected source.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,361 - Reviews: 469 - Favs: 1,455 - Follows: 222 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Experiments by Jasmine Kay reviews
Bella experiments with a Fudge Pop. Better than it sounds. warning: Very kinky and lemony. bxE ONESHOT. warnig: not for the weak hearted if you cant stomach the idea of edward and bella having wild torrid and very kinky sex then dont read this.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,398 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 17 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Complete
Fun With Emmett by XEdwardCrazyX reviews
What happens when Edward has to hunt and Emmett has a little fun with his favorite human, Bella at school. How much trouble could one vampire and human get into?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 8,895 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 7/27/2008 - Published: 6/15/2008
Midnight Snack by Melancholy Ink Splatter reviews
Alice/Bella oneshot. Just something I needed to get out of my system. Bella and Alice find comfort in each other's arms one lonely night. But what happens when they are discovered? M for sex. Pretty short. Enjoy. R&R please.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,562 - Reviews: 90 - Favs: 155 - Follows: 38 - Published: 7/23/2008 - Bella, Alice - Complete
Edward Cullen? Scared? by ForEverTopaz1901 reviews
Edward and Bella watch a scary movie at Charlie's house. Bella sure gets a kick out of Edward's reaction to a part in the movie. Who knew that it would start a war of pranks over at the Cullens! Enjoy! R&R!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 16,426 - Reviews: 330 - Favs: 219 - Follows: 123 - Updated: 7/23/2008 - Published: 4/8/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Truth or Dare: Cullen Style by Moonshifting reviews
Yes, more Truth or Dare from our favorite vampires!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 940 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 49 - Published: 7/22/2008 - Edward, Bella
Lust and Blood by fifi-fictionalize reviews
Edward and Bella explore their boundaries with unexpected - but good - results. A bit smutty/dirty, but sweet. *Warning - some people will not like the ending! big, giant lemon, OOC-ish
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,817 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 7/15/2008 - Published: 7/13/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Emmett Versus Drive Thru by Twilight Mischief reviews
My way? But I came here for Bella!" Emmett has some fun while doing some errands for Alice. Can fast food survive Emmett?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,310 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 7 - Published: 7/14/2008 - Emmett - Complete
Fun at the gym by Emily Mood reviews
The Cullens pull some fun pranks at the local gym.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,854 - Reviews: 102 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 7/14/2008 - Published: 7/3/2008 - Bella, Emmett
Hallelujah by The real Anna-Tess-and Fantine reviews
What happens when the Cullens go to church? Complete and utter mayhem! Includes commandment breaking, embarrassment, and Emmett shooting his mouth off...again. Church will never be the same! Bella's a vamp
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,107 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/14/2008 - Published: 7/6/2008 - Complete
The War of the Pranks by Nikkitaa reviews
Emmett and the others have decided to have some fun with Bella now that she isn't so easily broken. It's a prank war between the genders. Funny and some fluff, haven't ruled out lemons either ; . Summary sucks but the story is better
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,907 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 7/11/2008 - Published: 7/4/2008
Music Appreciation by acrochick1992 reviews
Bella is a student at Washington University in Seattle. She knows that it's not right to have a crush a teacher but she can't help but fall for Mr. Cullen anyway. Full summary inside! All Human!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,384 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 106 - Updated: 7/6/2008 - Published: 5/25/2008
deleted scenes by neonmoonbeams reviews
a book about what you didn't see in the twilight books twilight,newmoon,eclipse what happens when bella gets drunk? let see
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 667 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/3/2008 - Published: 6/6/2008
Jasper's Shock by OldRuins reviews
When everyone but Bella, Edward, and Jasper are out hunting and Jasper goes up to Carlisle's office to get a book, but before he goes in he hears a comprmising conversation going on between Bella and Edward. *funny innuendo*
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 741 - Reviews: 81 - Favs: 135 - Follows: 25 - Published: 7/3/2008 - Complete
If Edward Could Sleep by PrincesSarah reviews
What if Edward could sleep? What if Bella wasn't the only sleep-talker? Ok, i just thought it would be fun to try this idea out. It has the classic Edward&Bella moments, but also some ATTEMPTED humor. Sooo...yeah.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,824 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 7/1/2008 - Published: 1/13/2008 - Complete
Emmett's Sex Addiction And Jasper's Secret Crush by Vampiremizuki reviews
Emmett discovers that he has a great-great niece. What happens when they go out and seek to find out about her? Also, what’s up with Jasper making googly eyes at Bella? How will Bella react and what will happen to Edward and Alice? & what's Emmett hiding?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,326 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 18 - Published: 6/28/2008
Drunk? by MidnightThoughts reviews
What happens when Edward has to leave a depressed Bella to go hunt? find out what happens! i rated it T just in case drinking is not meant for little kids.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,040 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/27/2008 - Complete
Teasing by cherry-kiss-red reviews
When Edward finally lets Bella cross his boundaries and stops his teasing, the couple gets closer than ever. Let the fun begin.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,974 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 127 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 6/27/2008 - Published: 3/30/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
A Picture's Worth A Thousand Words by LilyAlice reviews
Esme decides it's time to pull out the Cullen photo albums and relive all the fun, crazy and sweet moments that she has captured over the last fifty years since Bella has joined the family.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,435 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 6/25/2008 - Published: 6/18/2008
Babysitting bella by Maya Swan reviews
Bella is forced to babysit because Charlie caught Bella doing some not so great things with Edward. How will they deal with the new kid? LEMONS!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 8 - Words: 7,641 - Reviews: 134 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 130 - Updated: 6/22/2008 - Published: 2/7/2008
Silence by musically inclined reviews
“She went through a very terrible ordeal.I don’t know any of the details.All we know is that she witnessed something awful.She doesn't talk to anyone."The Cullens adopt Bella expecting to gain a child.They never expected to gain one with so many secrets..
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Suspense - Chapters: 15 - Words: 25,645 - Reviews: 723 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 190 - Updated: 6/21/2008 - Published: 5/25/2008 - Complete
Road Trip Full of Dares by JaceDamian23 reviews
The Cullens and Bella play Truth or Dare on the road. Read to see all the crazey dares that they must fullfill. It'll be Edward/Bella. Don't Flame me.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,104 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 6/20/2008 - Published: 6/19/2008
Ruler of the world! by AliceInWonderfulLand reviews
A random, funny glimpse into the lives of the Cullens and Bella. Complete with firsts such as grocery shopping, laundry, and hide and seek.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 10,832 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 6/16/2008 - Published: 3/25/2007
Not So Long Ago by MissPrettyCullen reviews
The Cullen's try to find old home videos from when they were kids. Funny and cute home video's from one Cullen to the other.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,071 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 14 - Published: 6/9/2008
Bella's Pleasure by chalkboard reviews
Bella's pleasure when Edward visits.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 575 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 25 - Published: 6/7/2008 - Complete
Decorating by Linzamo123 reviews
Bella and Alice decide to surprise Edward. *giggles*
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 620 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/5/2008 - Complete
love is truly something by YinDragonVampire reviews
sequal to truth or dare with seducing.bellas pregnant,edward ecstatic,charlies fuming,emmett & jasper teasing continues on,lemons,and everything you loved about the last one times ten!edward gets bella pregant and this is their funny little adventure. R&R
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 13,797 - Reviews: 1237 - Favs: 770 - Follows: 899 - Updated: 6/2/2008 - Published: 9/11/2007
Isabella's Chat by AngelSixSixSix reviews
Bella is on her period, Edward does what he can to make her happy. But what will Charlie think about what is going on behind the closed door? This story is kinda like Rosalie's Chat. Bella's a human still. Funny, please Read and Review!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 8 - Words: 3,388 - Reviews: 157 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 5/31/2008 - Published: 4/13/2008 - Complete
Locked in by Lessien-Dorthonion reviews
All human. Bella and Edward go to the same school and hates each other since the first day Bella started at Forks high school. Alice is Bellas best friend and she wants Bella and Edward together so she locked them in a room togheter. What will happen next
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,827 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 114 - Updated: 5/30/2008 - Published: 4/11/2008
Love or not? by greysgirl15 reviews
Edward is Bella’s English teacher. Bella’s mother died and Bella is cynical about love. Can Edward Show her Love truly does exist… He can see through her wall. Will love happen, AU. Ed/BL all human. Please read and review
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,463 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 44 - Published: 5/28/2008
My Miracle, My Angel by l'heure bleue reviews
My name is Bella Swan, and I'm pregnant. My fiancé is overprotective, and won't even let me walk up the stairs alone. So what could possibly go wrong? Mood swings, cravings and name games, to name a few. — WINNER of 4 Twilight Awards! WRITTEN BEFORE BD!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 35 - Words: 100,422 - Reviews: 3559 - Favs: 2,791 - Follows: 853 - Updated: 5/28/2008 - Published: 3/22/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
What Is Up With Emmett? by Will-alwys-Luv-Jace92 reviews
Emmett gets Edward away from Bella for a while, but of course, can we trust him? Read to find out what he does with Bella to embarrass her before Edward gets back! 1st fanfic
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,688 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/27/2008 - Complete
TruthorDare, Dancing, and Gay Dates by taylorsita reviews
The Cullens and Bella play truth or dare, but it turns into something else. Alice picks dare, and comes out with a date. R&R, no flaming.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,252 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 10 - Published: 5/26/2008 - Complete
A Game Of Truth Or Dare by Rosette-Cullen reviews
For daddys little cannibal's contest. Emmett, Edward and Bella all play a simple game of truth or dare. Not very cliche, rated for some innuendos, but nothing too bad.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,279 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 49 - Published: 5/24/2008 - Complete
Cooking With Emmett! by SparklesareShineh reviews
What happens when Emmett gets his own cooking show? And who will his special guest be?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,403 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 5/17/2008 - Published: 5/15/2008
Emmett and Rosalie's Weekend by ILoveTwilight4Ever reviews
Emmett and Rosalie's Weekend- Emmett and Rosalie want to have a crazy, fun weekend with they're sibblings Edward & Bella, and Jasper & Alice. Without getting caught by Dad Carlisle or Mom Esme . They will realize this is one weekend they will never forget
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 5,113 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 5/15/2008 - Published: 4/26/2008
Family Therapy Cullen Style by vjgm reviews
Carlisle has had it with the children's constant bickering so he sends the Cullen's to family therapy. Suicidal Edward,Bella's fear of committment, Alice addicted to shopping, Rosalie's hostility, Emmett and Japer's gambling..who will survive? FUNNY
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 69,221 - Reviews: 8408 - Favs: 7,597 - Follows: 1,761 - Updated: 5/15/2008 - Published: 11/10/2007 - Complete
Edward Watches Bella Sleep by felblossom reviews
Edward's POV from the first night Bella and Edward spend together in Twilight, with an unexpected twist... ;
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 953 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 24 - Published: 5/8/2008 - Complete
Look Alike by Daddy's Little Cannibal reviews
The Cullens watch Goblet of Fire and notice that a certain wizard looks like a certain vampire, fluffy and a little funny. BXE One-shot Very short.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,223 - Reviews: 259 - Favs: 416 - Follows: 60 - Published: 5/6/2008 - Complete
You Know You Wanted This xxx by Aglow reviews
Alice comes up with a great plan for the none existent sex life of Bella and Edward. With Jasper convinced to help and Bella unknowingly helping every step of the way, how much will Edward love Alice in the end? Hot Version
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 10,261 - Reviews: 245 - Favs: 106 - Follows: 147 - Updated: 5/4/2008 - Published: 4/10/2007 - Complete
Emmett's Bean by Waffle of Doom reviews
Emmett does something he shouldn't, big shocker there.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 845 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 7 - Published: 5/2/2008 - Emmett - Complete
Bella's Problem by FairyPyrateChaosJoe reviews
I'm sure everyone's wondered about it at some point or another. What happens when Bella's on her period? Now you don't have to wonder anymore. Rated T just in case.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,148 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 57 - Updated: 5/2/2008 - Published: 8/6/2007 - Complete
Popcorn EdwardxBella Fluff by whitewolf08 reviews
More fluffle, of course. Mighta have figured out by now that I kinda hate writing anything but ffluffies... Bella makes a snack, and Edward manages to screw up the process. Fun, right?
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 834 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/30/2008 - Complete
WOW by Vamp21 reviews
Bella and Edward have fun in the rain.Some B/E fluff. Rated M just to be safe! Started off as a One-Shot. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,802 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 53 - Updated: 4/30/2008 - Published: 4/13/2008
How to get kicked out of WalMart by lanna-misssunshine reviews
Bella and the Cullen's playing dares in WalMart, oh such fun... how much will they get away with before being tossed out? Read my notes story aswell, Ch61 is how this story started R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 10 - Words: 11,218 - Reviews: 759 - Favs: 383 - Follows: 322 - Updated: 4/28/2008 - Published: 12/31/2007
Twilight in Real Life by Loco-motion reviews
One-shot. What happens when the Twilight characters find the Twilight Books? And who is plotting against them? All human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,596 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 12 - Published: 4/26/2008 - Complete
Emmett's List by Lace168 reviews
What is the worst Emmett could do in an elevator? Read to find out!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,264 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 4/9/2008 - Published: 1/11/2008
Emmett's idea of fun by moggle94 reviews
Emmett's bored. uh-oh nothing good can come of that. R&R!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,303 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 4/5/2008 - Published: 3/25/2008 - Complete
It's All Fun and Games at the Cullen House by Emmettlover27 reviews
LEMON!EdxBe FLUFF! I suck at summarys, you've been warnded. Bella is playing games with Edward and the whole familys in on it. Read to find out more!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,533 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 4/5/2008 - Published: 4/1/2008
Then he was kissing me by ibetonalice reviews
One shot Lemon. Bella/Edward. First fanfic. Rated M for sex.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,216 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/1/2008 - Complete
First Fight by CrAcKcookeis reviews
Bella is a vampire already and her and Edward have their first real fight, what does every couple do after a fight? Have make-up sex of course! watch out kiddies there is lemonie goodness ahead!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,153 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 20 - Published: 3/29/2008
Promises by vjd reviews
Fluff and lots of it! Edward and Bella find themselves alone in Florida while visiting Renee during Eclipse. One shot just for fun! Enjoy! R&R please!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,867 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 160 - Follows: 21 - Published: 3/29/2008 - Complete
Good Morning Bella by ronOReds reviews
It's Bella's last Thursday as a human, and the Cullen siblings introduce Bella to a concept called "Thirsty Thursdays." Listen as Edward recounts the story of her crazy night!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,243 - Reviews: 744 - Favs: 768 - Follows: 126 - Published: 3/10/2008 - Complete
The Game of Hide and Seek by Star869 reviews
Sequel to The Game of Truth or Dare. Random! Edward is away hunting. Bella dooms herself by complaining that she is bored. I think you can get the rest. Rated T for safety.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,413 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 3/9/2008 - Published: 3/8/2008
Little Cullens by Math hime reviews
All the cullens have been turned into 5 year olds! bella and werewolf gang have to babysit them.trouble!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,462 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 3/2/2008 - Published: 2/16/2008
Please by DramaticStarlet reviews
Emmett Cullen says please when he asks for things. EmmettRosalie.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 782 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 5 - Published: 2/29/2008 - Complete
Bananas by Lilyfish reviews
Edward, Bella and flavoured body oil
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,542 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 8 - Published: 2/27/2008 - Complete
Pocket Pinups: Portraits of the Cullen Family by CullenLove reviews
Several moments from the hilarious life of the Cullen family. Warning: beware of pumpkin suits and thongs!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 14,454 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 2/14/2008 - Published: 10/9/2007 - Complete
Christmas at the Cullens! by Emmett-Cullen-Lova-01 reviews
This is yet another Christmas story. It is pure fluff and family fun! A family of vampires at christmas time is interesting. Especially with mistletoe around.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,371 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 2/6/2008 - Published: 12/9/2007 - Complete
www vampireschat net by So-Eager-4-Eternal-Damnation reviews
What happens when the Cullens decide to go into a vampire chat room! Slightly OOC. Probably a oneshot! T for slight language.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,316 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 35 - Published: 2/1/2008
We're going camping by LilyAlice reviews
Alice and Emmett decide that the family should go camping since Bella and Edward denied them the fun of throwing bachlor and bachlorette parties. Please tell me what you think.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 30,441 - Reviews: 341 - Favs: 173 - Follows: 77 - Updated: 1/26/2008 - Published: 12/17/2007 - Complete
Every Second REWRITE by nvrfarbehind reviews
This is my story of Bella and Edward. It's full of fluff, cause ya know ya like it, humor and funtimes : Have fun :D
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,477 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 1/25/2008 - Published: 1/19/2008
Bella Needs It Bad by chickymeg177 reviews
Bella needs it bad from Edward...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 100 - Reviews: 124 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 13 - Published: 1/22/2008 - Complete
When I Think About You I Touch Myself by thefoodsnob reviews
Bella is commited to waiting until they are married before Edward fulfills his ends of the bargain,however Edward is making it as hard on her as he possibly can.When Alice, Esme, Rosalie, Renee, Jessica, and Angela intercede, it's a recipe for pure comedy
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 31,058 - Reviews: 940 - Favs: 687 - Follows: 753 - Updated: 1/21/2008 - Published: 11/15/2007
That's How We Roll by Lella Reincarnated reviews
Alice, Edward, Bella, and Jasper steal a plane and have some insane fun. Where will the plane land? You decide.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,101 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 1/21/2008 - Published: 7/13/2007
Intoxicated by Just A Little Bit Dramatic reviews
Bella discovers the positive side of being older than Edward, and decides to have some fun of her own to get back at her vampire sweetheart for not changing her sooner. Rated T to be safe...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,856 - Reviews: 172 - Favs: 131 - Follows: 159 - Updated: 1/21/2008 - Published: 7/28/2007
Surprise! by RestlessRomance reviews
Bella wakes up, surprised to see Edward is in an exceptionally good mood. I wonder why...? Bella's point of view. Edward x Bella
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,166 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 32 - Published: 1/17/2008
Love Lines by Scarlett71177 reviews
Bella reads Edward's palm.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,205 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 657 - Follows: 92 - Published: 1/14/2008 - Complete
Seducing Edward by Lady AlyseB630 reviews
Bella want's to become a vampire but Edward isn't budging. Bella cam only think of one thing that might possibly work, Seduction. With the help of Alice Bella will try to seduce the love of her life no matter what it takes. Seducing Edward... ON HOLD!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,998 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 1/7/2008 - Published: 11/15/2007 - Bella, Edward
AOL: Cullen Style by twilightsisters07 reviews
JxBxE and the rest of the Cullens have some pretty fun times online. Especially once Bella goes missing... read to find out if Edward can get her back or if he will have to spend eternity alone wondering just who Jill was...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 650 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/5/2008
Truth or Dare: Cullen Style! by xedwardxloverx reviews
What happens when Alice gets the whole gang involved in a game of Truth or Dare? You'll be surprised where it ends up...Read to find out!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 15,696 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 12/30/2007 - Published: 10/28/2007 - Complete
Alice's Little Stunt by xedwardxloverx reviews
This is the Epilogue to my story Truth or Dare: Cullen Style!. I have said previously that story was finished, but I wanted to do an Epilogue to it, and felt the need to make a separate story for it. Read the end of that story before you start this one!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,656 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 11 - Published: 12/30/2007 - Complete
Babysitting Buddies by twilightnite reviews
Based of the oneshot from Crazy Cullen Chronicles. What happens when Emmett so 'graciously' volunteers to help Bella babysit three kids? What is Team G.A.S.? 'Happy Juice? Threatening to blow up the house? Explosive cookies? A drunk Emmett? Uh-oh!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,568 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 10 - Published: 12/30/2007
Midnight by MissingxMe reviews
Edward and Bella fight and Alice is there to comfort Bella. AxB
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,406 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 10 - Published: 12/29/2007 - Complete
Truth or Dare by katcastle reviews
This is a random fic where the Cullens play truth or dare! See what crazy things these vampires will do!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 17,094 - Reviews: 587 - Favs: 386 - Follows: 369 - Updated: 12/24/2007 - Published: 7/14/2007
Best Friends Save Lives by dying.for.noone reviews
Best Friends can save your life without even knowing it. They can help without you even realizing it. A best friend can save a life, just by talking. BXE, M for abuse, rape, and sex later on. r&r please. Bella's in trouble, Edward can help.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,222 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 48 - Published: 12/23/2007
Use Your Vampire Speed by CullenLove reviews
Edward and Bella's first experience of sex! Sweet, hot and steamy! [ Outtake of story 'Blood Berries', but you don't have to have read that to read this ] RATED 'M' FOR A REASON !
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,205 - Reviews: 187 - Favs: 204 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 12/20/2007 - Published: 11/19/2007 - Complete
Truth or Dare, Cullen style! by vampirelurver979 reviews
What happens when Bella agrees to play truth or dare with the Cullens? Why is Bella dressed up as Pikachu? Why is Mike kissing Edward? What's the connection between Edward and his precious Volvo? Read and find out.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 15,865 - Reviews: 233 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 127 - Updated: 12/17/2007 - Published: 9/23/2007
Emmett's Friends by sweetalice reviews
Emmett is sad so he goes into the meadow and what does he find in the bushes? Come on and read!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 968 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/9/2007 - Complete
Let's Talk about Periods by watchingtheworld reviews
It's another period day, and the Cullen women decide to talk about it in front of Bella, and in front of the guys. Poor Bella! Rated T for content.UPDATE! for those who are waiting for the masturbation story, just wait another week plz :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,006 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 12/5/2007 - Published: 12/4/2007 - Complete
Fresh Blood by BellyGnomes reviews
Taking off where New Moon ended. Bella and Edward explore their physical relationship while outside forces attempt to pull them apart. Sex, Comedy, Drama, Romance, and Adventure all mixed into one titillating story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 75,616 - Reviews: 871 - Favs: 511 - Follows: 451 - Updated: 11/12/2007 - Published: 6/3/2007
Tricks and Treats by MyEdwardAndI reviews
It's Halloween at Forks and Bella is in for a surprise. Throw into a house some naughty vampires, humans, candy, kids, costumes and props and you've got lots of fun, romance and humor! Read and review!: bella X edward
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 892 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 17 - Published: 11/1/2007
Kitten by chocolateaddict1 reviews
Edward has a ..........surprise for Bella
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,043 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 10/12/2007 - Published: 10/11/2007
Emmett and the Mosquito by Rosalie Sparrow reviews
A mosquito has come into the Cullen house and starts to annoy Emmett. Will all be hunky dory or will there be catastrophe?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 673 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 32 - Follows: 4 - Published: 10/2/2007 - Complete
Truth Or Dare by bleedingblackrosez reviews
what happens when Bella and the Cullens play truth or dare? chaos! my 1st fanfics ever, please PLEASE review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,118 - Reviews: 452 - Favs: 355 - Follows: 312 - Updated: 9/27/2007 - Published: 8/31/2007
Truth Or Dare With The Cullens by Sorcha123 reviews
i think the title says it all! funny, fluff and lighthearted. with an interesting end! :
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,043 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 9/23/2007 - Published: 8/26/2007 - Complete
Emmett Can Move by topaz addiction reviews
Emmett attmepts to teach Jasper how to dance...this of course can only lead to chaos.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 756 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 7 - Published: 9/19/2007 - Complete
Emmett's Man's Day by Mayura-Hikari-090 reviews
Emmett tries to enjoy a day alone...'tries' is the keyword [Oneshot]
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,083 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 10 - Published: 9/10/2007 - Complete
Oops by brown-eyes27 reviews
ONE SHOT! Edward and Bella go swimming.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,170 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 8 - Published: 9/2/2007 - Complete
Emmett's War by Azeure reviews
When Emmett locks Edward in a closet, Bella declares war. Can Edward and Bella beat Emmett at his own game? A story for the prankster in all of us.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,528 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 9/1/2007 - Published: 8/21/2007 - Complete
How To Teach Love by Sura Kiyina reviews
Bella is abused and Edward is her teacher. What happens when he gives her a private lesson? Lemons, not just sex but a storyline too. All humans, a few typos, very sorry about those xD
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 35,665 - Reviews: 537 - Favs: 468 - Follows: 201 - Updated: 8/28/2007 - Published: 8/13/2007 - Complete
Paint by brown-eyes27 reviews
ONESHOT! Edward and Bella paint Bella's room. Flufffff
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 938 - Reviews: 46 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 12 - Published: 8/26/2007 - Complete
Emmett and Bingo Fun by iceprincess263 reviews
Bella is alone with Emmett and wants to go play bingo. What will crazy Emmett do at bingo? Who shows up? Rated T in case. R&R Now Complete!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 7,865 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 8/16/2007 - Published: 7/14/2007 - Complete
Emmett's Mission: Stalk & Harass by HEY YOU with the glasses reviews
Follow Emmett and his accomplice, Jasper, as they stalk & harass fellow Forkians. FUNNY! Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,311 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 48 - Published: 8/2/2007
Edward's Stalker by angelofmusicxo reviews
What happens when Bella's absent and there's a new teacher who happens to have an obsession with Edward? Starring: Creepy stalker teacher! REVIEW!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,336 - Reviews: 278 - Favs: 187 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 7/18/2007 - Published: 5/26/2007
Babysitting Bella by yoru-anime-yume reviews
Summary:sequal to Babysitting Edward What would happen if Emmett still had some potion left over and slipped it in Bella’s drink? Chaos ensues.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,191 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 14 - Published: 7/16/2007
Bella, Edward, and the Twenty Q Ball by YoolieYick reviews
Bella and Edward playing with a Twenty Q ball and trying to make it guess vampire... This is completely random... Oneshot... Takes place any random time after New Moon, it doesn't matter. Bella is NOT a vampire! Cute, funny, a little fluffy.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,097 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 21 - Published: 6/24/2007 - Complete
Attention, WalMart Shoppers by sillybella reviews
Edward has decided Bella needs protection. What kind ofprotection? The kind you can buy at Walmart. In the pharmacy.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 6,536 - Reviews: 1727 - Favs: 3,135 - Follows: 647 - Updated: 1/29/2007 - Published: 1/24/2007 - Complete
A Brother's Love by bronzehairedgirl reviews
Edward is hunting and sends Emmett to keep an eye on Bella. An exploration of Bella and Emmett's relationship.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,503 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 477 - Follows: 91 - Updated: 1/24/2007 - Published: 1/17/2007 - Complete
UH OH by BlaineAndersonLover reviews
when bella gets a phone and starts to text message in class with the rest of the cullens there is bound to be trouble. what happens when they get caught and a teacher takes up the phones?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,632 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 1/17/2007 - Published: 11/23/2006
Fever by sillybella reviews
Bella is sick and Edward is worried.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,287 - Reviews: 401 - Favs: 827 - Follows: 206 - Published: 10/18/2006 - Complete
Beyond Simplicity by Lauren-Ash reviews
Edward and Bella Fic. Edward's POV. Edward and Bella share a sweet night together.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,157 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 10 - Published: 10/5/2006 - Complete
Emmett's Fault by passionfornight reviews
Just another morning right. Of course not, because something happens and it is all Emmett's fault. One shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 809 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 10 - Published: 6/24/2006 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Watching by bella cullen reviews
One shot. Who is watching Edward and Bella?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Suspense/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 352 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Published: 5/27/2006 - Complete
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