vamp.ladybug
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Joined 01-16-09, id: 1806706, Profile Updated: 01-29-11
Author has written 3 stories for Twilight.

Hey! this is vamp.ladybug I love Twilight and can't wait to get some of the plot lines out of my head and on to paper but that might take a while so bear with me :)

I'm a 22 year old student born and raised in Texas and have decided to try and write in my spare time. I am not an English major so there will be mistakes in my stories. Sorry.

Also I am thinking about consolidating the chapters of 'Secrets' once I get to 20 chapters regrouping them into ten chapters because they are so short... but I still am not sure about it.

OUT-TAKES FOR SECRETS is up! This is where I will put up other bits and pieces like Alice and Jasper stuff...

New story 'What is Significant?' please read and tell me what you think.

I have a few stories spining in my head two I know I will put up eventuall but not before I finish them or one of the other two I have up now are done.

I AM SO SORRY THAT I HAVE NOT UPDATED LIKE I WANTED TO BUT LIFE KIND OF HAPPENED...

As of right now writers block is making fun of me and a new semester is starting so update will not be what I want them to be... :(

I just love these

FRIENDS AND BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying "DAMN!"

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high-school /college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will help me find my way when I'm lost.

BEST FRIENDS: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

FRIENDS: Will help me learn to drive.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.

FRIENDS: Will help me up when I fall down.

BEST FRIENDS: Will point and laugh because she tripped me.

FRIENDS: Will go to a concert with me.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kidnap the band with me.

FRIENDS: Hide me from the cops.

BEST FRIENDS: Are probably the reason they’re after me in the first place.

FRIENDS: Get angry at you for calling them late in the night.

BEST FRIENDS: Ask why it took so long for you to call

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Wonder about your love life.

BEST FRINDS: Could blackmail you with it

FRIENDS: Lets me make an idiot of myself in public.

BEST FRIENDS: Are up there with me making an idiot out of themselves too.

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days...”

FRIENDS: Help you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Already has a shovel ready to bury the loser who made you cry.

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Tells you she knows how you feel.

BEST FRIENDS: Just sits down and cries.

Okay I found this on Mrs.EdwardAMCullens profile I love it!

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Choose--me or your life

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

sigh if only there was a guy like that for me ...

I found these on Sierra Swan’s profile and had to add them

"Not only is life a bitch, but it is always having puppies."

"She's my best friend. Break her heart, and I'll break your face."

"I plan on living forever...so far so good."

"Love your enemies. It makes them so damn mad." --P.D. East

"When someone says "nothing is impossible" ask them to dribble a football."

"The key to a healthy marriage is to keep your eyes wide open before you wed and half-closed thereafter." Benjamin Franklin

I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

"The greater danger for most of us is not that
our aim is too high and we miss it, but
that it is too low and we reach it."
- Michelangelo

"Fall seven times, stand up eight."

Here are just a bunch of random things I found on the Internet and other profiles that I copied and posted:

Edward Cullen-Sexier than you since 1901

Emmett Cullen-Stronger than you since 1916

Jasper Hale-Charming ladies since 1843

Rosalie Hale-Better than you since 1916

Alice Cullen-Quirkier than you since 1901

The Right Guy:

Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,

who calls you backwhen you hang up on him,

who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.

Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy that kisses your forhead,

who keeps your picture in his wallet,

who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,

who holds your handin front of all his freinds,

who thinks your beautiful without makeup,

one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,

THE one who turns to his friends and says THATS HER!

WARNING: MAY NEED TISSUES FOR THESE:

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl:Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy:No, this is fun.

Girl:No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy:Then tell me you love me.

Girl:I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this into your profile if you would do this for someone you love.


(These ones are great for a laugh)

15 Things to do when you’re in Walmart!

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "We have a Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"

12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

15.Grap alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go"

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

- Unknown

MORE FUNNY QUOTES:

-Who ever said that nothing was impossible clearly never tried to slam a revolving door.

-If two wrongs don't make a right, try three

-1 out of every 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends, if it's not them, it's you.

-One day we're going to look back on this, laugh nervously and then change the subject

-We're best friends. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You laugh, I laugh. You jump off a bridge I laugh harder.

-Apparently 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. Either it's my mom or my dad. Or my older brother Collin. Or my other brother Ho-Chan-Chu. I think it's Collin.

-My imaginary friend thinks that you have serious problems.

-A day without light is, well, night

-Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls

-Those who cannot remember the past are going to spend a lot of time in mall parking lots looking for their cars

-Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't

-I can only please on person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow's not looking good, either.

- I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

-If you're forced to choose between two evils, choose the one you've never tried before. ;)

-There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. :D

-What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
'Hold my purse.'

-You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

-I don't obsess! I think intensely. (so true!)

-They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people. this is an eddie izzard quote :)

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Dog Days of Summer by Risbeen reviews
Meet Poodle; he's about to turn Bella's day from bad to worse. Well, Poodle and his owner, Edward Cullen. My silly contribution to F4SAA
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,474 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 20 - Published: 8/2/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
True Companion by bellamarie117 reviews
Bella Swan always believed in happily ever afters.When she marries her high school sweetheart & starts her own wedding business, she thinks she's living her dream.Then it all comes crashing down.Can a handsome photographer help her believe in love again?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 30,108 - Reviews: 1123 - Favs: 1,736 - Follows: 1,028 - Updated: 4/22/2011 - Published: 4/4/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Hear No Evil by BlueSea14 reviews
After over a hundred years alone, a deaf vampire Bella finds the Cullen family. With no memory of her human past, and no way to communicate with the world, how can they help her? Canon.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 25 - Words: 97,077 - Reviews: 1586 - Favs: 2,289 - Follows: 833 - Updated: 4/9/2010 - Published: 6/15/2007 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Then Came You by sshg316 reviews
Always a bridesmaid, never a bride. More like always the friend, never the girlfriend. The eternally unlucky Bella Swan is an unwitting matchmaker and a magnet for soul mates ... for everyone but herself. Fluff. AH. Edward/Bella.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,565 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 61 - Published: 3/3/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Blindsided by theladyingrey42 reviews
Awkward, self-conscious Bella distracts herself from the torments of high school gym class by watching the adorable if painfully shy new kid, Edward. A cruel prank finally gives them a chance to get to know one other. For the TwiFans for Haiti compilation
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,858 - Reviews: 372 - Favs: 890 - Follows: 688 - Published: 3/1/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Passing By by DeltaSwan90 reviews
It was written law in Revolutionary France, "Should a man be convicted of a crime and sentenced to hang, he may be saved by a virtuous maiden who agrees to marry him." E/B, AU, AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 21 - Words: 85,235 - Reviews: 2189 - Favs: 3,187 - Follows: 1,275 - Updated: 11/16/2009 - Published: 6/24/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
On the Corner of First and Amistad by Sierra Swan reviews
Came up w/ the idea when listening to You Found Me by the the fray; NOT based on song. Bella & Edward both have dark pasts: every1 near Bella has died or left her and Edward used to be beaten. They meet in a coffee shop at Washington State, B/E and AH
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 22 - Words: 69,009 - Reviews: 510 - Favs: 122 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 1/22/2009
Shattered by Teeny Tiny Twilight reviews
Edward is always comforting Bella, but what happens when Edward needs Bella to comfot him. especially after Edward hurts her.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,937 - Reviews: 94 - Favs: 207 - Follows: 27 - Published: 4/26/2008 - Complete
Love Thy Neighbour by BookMe reviews
Alice and Rosalie work at Vogue and need an interesting topic for their next month's article. Edward moves into town, and Bella has two weeks off work. What will happen when a pair of sneeky Cupids come out to play? All Human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 63,134 - Reviews: 740 - Favs: 708 - Follows: 270 - Updated: 4/22/2008 - Published: 3/24/2008 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Secrets reviews
Bella and Jasper have been friends since before their change and had been in Texas since the Civil War. Tired of the conflicts at home they go to Alaska to try and find some peace. Will they find the peace they were looking for? allvamp cannon pairs.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 37,053 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 4/1/2010 - Published: 5/19/2009 - Bella, Edward
What is Significant reviews
Bella has lived through a lot and as a result she is the quiet one at school and when the new kids bring uproar to the quiet school in Forks will Bella be drawn out of her shell with a new class project or will it undue all the work she... Cannon pairs
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 17,061 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/10/2009 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Bella, Edward
Secrets Outtakes
Outtakes from Secrets different POV's for the most part.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,141 - Published: 8/31/2009 - Bella, Edward
Mk Marie (11)