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Author has written 9 stories for H2O: Just Add Water, Maximum Ride, Star Wars, Aquamarine, Misc. Books, Legend of Zelda, Naruto, StarTrek: The Original Series, and Death Note.
Hi! I'm Zoe625. If your here, you've seen one of my stories. If you haven't read them, I’d suggest doing so.
JILL*Cough* JELL *Cough: 1) CHECK OUT MY NEW QUOTES!!!! 2) -_- Nartuo Abridged is much better than the actual thing.
Name: HA! LIKE I’M GONNA TELL YOU!!! Just call me Zoe.
Age: I’m between 5 and 40
Hair color: I’m blonde. Even if my hair wasn’t blonde, I’d still be considered a blonde.
Eye color: My eyes are like a blue…grey mix. They’re cool to look at though.
Favorite color: BLUE!!! OMG BLUE BLUE BLUE BLUE!!!! LIKE TURQUOISE!!!
Favorite Food: MUFFINS!!!!! (They don’t like the light)
Favorite Animal: DOLPHINS AND LLAMAS!! There is an abnormally large heard in my head. (If you actually read my crap and care to learn their names, you can PM me. I just might name one after you! For instance, I now have two more. One named Fluffy and the other’s name is slippers based after a review named Fluffyslippers)
Most I like to read. My favorite series is the tales of the frog princess, by E.D Baker. She is my all-time FAV author. Richt up there with Michel Scott! READ HER BOOKS!
The Frog Princess
Once Upon a Curse
No Place for Magic
And Dragon princess
She also wrote “Wings, a fairy tale”
Ok, Favorite video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FJ0_ZeKPUE&feature=channel. “You’re a plumber” by Johnny Mushroom and the Kingdoms. Love it!
HEY PEEPS! COME CHEECK OUT my twit page!!!!
Labels: (that scare me)
These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods.
On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
Questions that haunt us all!
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
Things to do on an Elevator
1. CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral
5. MEOW occasionally.
6. STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7. SAY -DING at each floor.
8. SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9. MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16. ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21. SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22. CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it
23. AS you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
24. BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
25. MAKEcar race noises when someone gets on or off.
26. CONGRATULATE all for being in the same lift with you.
27. GRIMACE painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
28. WALK on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
29. WHILE the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
30. LET your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
31. ENTER into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
32. TAKE shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
33. ASK people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
34. ALSO in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
35. ASK, "Did you feel that?"
36. TELL people that you can see their aura.
37. WHEN the doors close, announce to the others, It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again.
38. ANNOUNCE in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
39. DRESS up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."
40. MAKE a song with the words, “Were going up (Or down)!” then sing it on the top of your lungs.
15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
Ways to Annoy people at the movie theater:
~Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.
~Clap when the good guy gets killed.
~During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"
~Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"
~Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
~Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.
~Yell out what is going to happen.
~Wear a cape and when it’s your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.
~Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.
~Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.
~Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.
~Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.
~Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.
~Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.
~Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)
~Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.
~Try to start a wave.
~Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.
~Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"
~Sing with the theme music.
~Bring and use your own air freshener.
~At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."
~Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.
~Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.
~Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.
~Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.
~Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.
~Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.
~When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"
~Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.
~start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.
~Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.
~Every time there is a gunshot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.
~Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.
~Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themselves.
~Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.
~Before the movie begins, tape fart cushions to various chairs in the theater room.
~Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.
~Bring a water gun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"
~Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"
~Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"
~Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can hear it, like when the killer's name is going to be said.
~Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.
~Bring a pager or cell phone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.
~Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.
~Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end
"Some tips when dealing with bullies: Never throw the first punch, always have a witness, and aim for the BALLS!! seriously, AIM FOR THE BALLS!!! If ya kick 'em hard enough, theres a good chance he'll loose the ability to create another generation of geneticly debased offspring!!"~Fomy the squirrel: Bullies
"*indian accent* Every body in whole line, dey never meet you in whole life! Think at same time 'Ur a f*ing Bitch! Dis how much bitch you are! We don't know you, but know you are bitch!"~Tommy Davidson
"Hell yeah I'm shootin cans! Mexi-cans! Afri-cans! Porta-ri-cans!"~Ray William Johnson
"Have any zombies tried to get into the house?" "Mmm I don't think so." "Good." "Unless you count those two guys dad beat to death with a shovel." "WHAT?!" "Some guys climbed over the fence and bothered him while he was reading so he beat 'em to death with a shovel." "And You didn't find that odd?!" "mmm...no not really." ~Anthony and Ashley from "Hey Ash, What'cha playin? Left 4 dead"
"If any creepers come in, just run...What are you going to do if a creeper shows up?" "Highfive it!" "no ash-" "I'll be like 'up top creeps!' " "Ash, n-" "I'll be like BAM!" "ash! You're gonna burn my shack down!" "I'll burn your shack down!" "That's what I said!" ~Anthony and Ash from "Hey ash, what'cha playin? minecraft"
"Ash get down here you-" "-ash is already there- ...I gotta bucket." "Are you carrying lava?" "Maybe.." "look, don't do what you're thinking of doing. there's something-" "BORED! -lava spills out of bucket at anthony-" "GOSH DANG IT ASH!! I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU!" "BEST GAME EVAAA!!" ~Anthony and Ash from "HAWP- Minecraft"
"You can only type 'Haha' 'lol' or "ROFLMAO" when you're actually LAUGHING! Friendship is build on a pillar of trust, and the pillar has CRUMBLED TO THE GROUND!!"~David from 'Hardly working'
"What I think we should do is focus our resources on... DAN ARE MURDERING PATRICK?!" "Is there a problem?" "Yeah!!!" "OH MY GOSH!! HOW AM I NOT SUPPOSED TO MURDER PATRICK?! HIS STUPID FACE IS DISTRACTING EVERYBODY!!!" "patrick: he's right Streeter, better just let 'im finish." "What?! Pat, we're not gonna let him murder you!!"
Tamayaki: "If you have no money, then you will pay with your body!!" Haruhi: "0_0..."~Tamayaki and Haruhi from "Ouran High School Host Club"
"Naruto cosplay Jutsu!!" "No way! He sommoned every naruto cosplayer within a 50 mile radius!!" cosplayer: "ONE PEICE?!? WELL KICK YOUR ASS!!"~Naruto, some guys, and cosplayers
"I want you to have this." "Your headband?" "Yup! Because aparently, you becoming a ninja is more important than me going to the hospital to treat this horrible possibly life threatening wound."~Naruto and some guy
"I don't get it. Why do the Anime girls always like the emo guys who treat them like crap? Seriously!"~Shikamaru from Naruto Abridged
"Sakura, I'm about to say what naruto fans have wanted to say to you for a long time. Shut... The hell up... you fuzz bag."~Sauske from Naruto Abridged
Kakashi: "Haha! We tricked you into thinking we were doing something important! ^_^" Naruto: *over the com line* F#$% YOU SENSEI!!!!"~naruto and kakashi from Naruto Abridged
"Alright, let me tell you about the five villages. We've got the drinking gourd... the... dog crap thing... the squiggly lines... the three puddles... and the...what the crap is our symbol?! No, seriously, it doesn't even look like a leaf!! It looks like a snail fell over and can't get up!... and then we've got the kages. Theres the blue, green, red, brown, and yellow. Together, they are... the kage rangers!!!"~Kakashi
"You know, logic has a brother. His name is SHUT THE HELL UP SAKURA!!!"~Kakashi
"We will distroy you all!!" "Well that's just mean!" "Okay, maybe not distroy... maybe just mame." "That's still pretty ass-holeish though, I mean... we didn't even DO anything to you guys." "Yeah, but-" "you didn't even give us the chance to defend ourselves!" "Well... we're ninjas! Aren't we supposed to do that?" "no. In this series ninjas who attack in the darkness when their enemies least suspect it are the bad guys." "Right, we're the good guy ninjas who only attack when provoked." ~ Two villans, Naruto, Sakura, Sauske, and Kakashi
"Oh great! Just what we need! a million Narutos... -_-"~sauske
Naruto: I wasn't aiming for you! I was amaing to get thrown behind you and throw shiruken at you so you would let go of sensei." Kakashi: "if that was your goal, then why didn't you just land behind him, jump on his back, and stab him point blank?!"~Kakashi and Naruto
"So sensei, who was that girl?" "Oh, she's from a band of reject mimes. They got kicked out of mime school because they talk... a LOT."~Naruto and Kakashi
"Okay, Chakra's like chi, except lamer, and it can only be used through hand gestures. And it combines... body and... soul...er, something stupid like that. And then all this crazy s#%@ happens and thats how us losers fight." "okay... Sakura, you're fired."~Sakura and Kakashi
Kakashi: "As for you two, i want you to run up this tree." Naruto: "But whyyyyy?!" Kakashi: "Beecause I f#$%ing said so! ...as for me and Sakura-" Naruto: "Sakura and I!" Kakashi: -_- *Pummels Naruto into bits*~Kakashi and naruto
guy: "Hey guys! I see you sucked it up!" Haku: "Yeah, well... what are you gonna do?" guy: "I'm gonna touch Zabuza's face for nooo reason!" Haku: *Grabs his hand* "LIKE HELL YOU ARE!" guy: "NOO!! THAT'S MY IMBEZZELING HAND!!" Haku: "No get out before I make you watch episodes of 4kids one peice!" Guy: "You wouldn't..."~haku and a guy
Naruto: "Aughh!! Can I go back to kakashi now?" Sauske: *from off screen* "SHARINGANS ONLY BITCH!!" Naruto: Augh!~Naruto and sauske
Itachi: Nine-Tails, come with us. Naruto: No! Itachi: No? NO!?! No..? Um..I wasn't expecting that...um..Please? Naruto: No! Itachi: Weelllll...crap. ok, lets go kisame~ Naruto and Itachi
Tsunade: "I know whats wrong! Sauske, show some emotion!" Sauske: "Never." Tsunade: *slaps him* " I said 'Show some emotion!' " Sauske: "OW!! what the?" Tsunade: *Slaps him again* "SHOW SOME EMOTION!!!" Sauske: "YOU CRAZY BITCH!!" Tsunade: *slaps him again* "SHOW SOME EMOTION!!" Sauske: *starts crying* "Okay okay! Just leave me alone!!"~Sauske and Tsunade from Naruto Abridged
Naruto: Next is Kakashi!! Tsunade: What happened to you? Kakashi:...eVeRyOne...lOveS.... tHe... CarAmellDanSen... Ugh uhhh..ugh... Me: That will teach you not to mess with Itachi's genjutsu!~Naruto, Tsunade, and Kakashi
Naruto: "Oh my word!! I just thought of something! This is...THE BIGGEST FREAKING FOREST I'VE EVER SEEN!! HOW DOES ANYONE GET AROUND IN THIS WORLD?!?"~Naturo
Itachi: "You know that taste in your mouth you get when you drink orange juice after brushing your teeth?" Orochimaru: "Ugh... I hate that!" Itachi: "I LOVE IT! -evil grin- do you like puppies?" Orochimaru: "Yes..." Itachi: "I KICK THEM!" Orochimaru: "GASP!" Itachi: "And that muffin you're eating...? >:)" Orochimaru: "No... don't tell me!" itachi: "I DROPPED IT ON THE FLOOR!!! MUHAHAHA!!!" ~Orochimaru and Itachi from 'Eviler than You"
"It's sad, isn't it? I've come to realize that 80% of Naruto is just... jumping through trees." ~ Kakashi from Naruto Shippuden Abridged
"Wait, that's it? ...If that's the case, why did you take so long then?" "Because human mutilation is FUN! ^_^" ~Kakashi and Sakura from Naruto Shippuden Abridged
Narator: "Akatsuki presents: The Akatsuki disney classics! So much fun packed onto one CD! Who could ever forget such classics as 'Arabian Nights.' sung by our favorite puppet master, Sasori! and how about, 'Under the Sea.' Sung by the one and only Kisame! by today, and we'll also include, ZETSU! Cuz, we don't want him! Aaand he probably wants to eat us. seriously. Remember to feed him 2 humans a day! This offer can't be missed! Or we'll F!@#ing kill you :D. buy now!" Sasori: "...We were really drunk, weren't we?" ~Narator and Sasori from Naruto Shippuden Abridged.
Pain: "Su, tell me, what's the matter?" Su: -a girl's voice with a british accent- "It looks like a group of konoha(sp?) ninjas have figured out where our hideout is. Pain: "What?! How could they find us? I swear I made sure our secret hideout wasn't on google maps. Damn it google! First you buy youtube and get our series banned. And now-" Zet: -deep man voice- actually they had one of the F!@#ing ninja dogs. They probably found one of those F!@#tart's sents. -points to Deidara and sasori- ~Pain and Zetsu from Naruto Shippuden Abridged
Pain: "Ugh, I'm sick and tired of you people questioning my evil plans. If you think this is some sort of evil council where everyone gets to have an opinions on the decisions I make, well I've got sour news for ya, sunshine. I'M the Mumsy around here! ...Wait, did I say mumsy?"~Pain
Kakashi: "-see's itachi- OH S%@#!!!" Sakura: "okay, now you're lying. There's no character called 'OH S%@#!!!' " kakashi: "No... no, look in front of us." Sakura: "-see's itachi- what? It's just itachi." (sakura and naruto realization in 3...2...1...) Sakura and Naruto: "OH S%@#!!!!" ~Kakashi, Sakura, and Naruto
Itachi: -music to 'I kissed a girl' start playing. singing- I killed my clan. and i liiiiked iiiit! even if i was orded by yonboo (O_o? That's what he says). I killed my clan, just to trryy iiiit! hope my little brother don't mind it! I did it for. all the wrong reasons. just for a stupid plot device. I killed my clan and i liiiked it! I liiiked iiit!" ~Itachi from naruto shippuden Abridged.
Naruto: "Where are you getting all these shiruken?" Itachi: "they had a buy one get 18 free deal at Cosco with an executive membership. yeah, Don't tell Kakuzu. it's expensive." ~Naruto and Itachi
Itachi: "Speaking of Cosco, when I went there with Kisame the other day, we passed one of those sample table booths. They were serving fish sticks so i leaned into kisame and i told him that it might be his family. and then he started crying. It was highlariously evil of me. MUHAHAHA!!" ~Itachi
Itachi: "-pulls out a cell phone. it rings for a while- Orochimaru: "HEEEEEllooooo, this is orochimaru's EVIL lair take-out. May I take your order?" Itachi: "It's Itachi. Can I please-" Orochimaru: "Oh hellllooooo itachi! are you calling because you changed your mind about that whole body-snatching thing?" Itachi: "No, no that's not why I'm calling. I want to speak to my brother, thank you." Orochimaru: "Oh...well...alright. One moment. Sauske! Itachi want's to talk to you!" Sauske: "I don't wanna talk to him! Tell him i'm out!" Orochimaru: "Oh... It appears that he's not here. May I take a message?" Itachi: "I just heard him in the backround. Put him on." orochimaru: "uh... -there's a scraty noise on the line- oh it appears we're going through a tunnel... thing. you're breaking up!" Itachi: -_- "Orochimaru...is that tin foil?" orochimaru: O_o "no. -hangs up-" ~Itachi and orochimaru
Neji: "Dude, what the hell? It's not going to work." Kisame: "Plus the fact the your pretty much yelling your plan directly AT ME!" ~Neji and Kisame from Naruto Shippuden Abridged
Might guy: "Because I have a secret weapon. One so secret i'm going to divulge it right now!" Kisame: "Then what was the point of it being secret in the first place?!" might guy: "Neji! Hand me...the giant harpoon!" Neji: "Dude, what?" Might Guy: "wait, didn't you... you didn't pack it? I TOLD YOU TO PACK IT!!" Neji: "Dude, when are we ever going to need a giant harpoon?" Might guy: "Uh, how about right now ya dumbass!!" ~Might guy, Kisame, and Neji from Naruto Shippuden abridged
Guy: "OH...MY...GOD...I PUNCHED THE UGLY OUT OF HIM!!!!" Neji: "Dude, thats not what you... you know what? screw it! you totaly punched the ugly out of him! sure thing." ~ Might guy and Neji
"What are you leafies talking about? All you have to do is remove that piece of paper from the bolder, and then you can destroy it! Good greif! You guys are all idiots!" ~Deidara from Naruto Shippuden Abridged
Deidara: " it's about time someone said to you, 'WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!?' " sasori: "Yarr, I...yar, I'm a villain! I'm supposed to like the things that people hate. aren't I?" Deidara: "Not THOSE things!! We're EVIL people! We have STANDARDS! And you're CLEARLY breaking them right now!!" ~Sasori and Deidara.
“I swear to drunk I'm not God!” – Fang from Another Form of the Avian Bird Flu
"You're pony's so hardcore." ~ Max from Another Form of the Avian Bird Flu
“Sometimes Fang was our smart, stealthy, second-in-command. Other times, he was just stupid.” ~ Iggy
“Are you getting ninja lessons from Fang or something?" ~ Iggy
“Is it just me, or is the insanity in this house catching?” ~ Fang
“Max does not wear dresses. To get her to do that, you have to give her a couple doses of Valium, and even then you have to handcuff her.” ~ Fang
“Ok, so I only slept about four hours last night, I’m overtired, and I have no idea what’s coming out of my mouth right now. I also have the weirdest craving for cupcakes. Do you think Iggy would make us cupcakes?” ~ Fang
“Crawl in a hole and die, Malfoy. I’m busy,” ~ Max from When a Winged Girl Meets a Magic Boy
I don't what is so scary about the Volturi," I mumbled. "I mean, really, they're just a bunch of nerds in snuggies." ~Bracey from What Edward didn’t know
“Is the body missing or did you just pull of a REALLY cool magic trick?” ~ Rick Castle from Castle
“I’m his fiancé.” “I’m his wife.” “Dude you are SO busted!” ~ Rick Castle
“I’d be happy to let you spank me” ~ Rick Castle
“When I’m not here do you to braid each other’s hair and debate who’s the best Jonas Brother?”“No.”“It’s Nick.” “Definitely Nick”~ Kate Becket, Esposito and Ryan
“I have to save Watson. Beam me up Scotty.” ~ Hiro Nakamora from Heroes
“But I’m George!”“Nice try, you have an F on your shirt dumb ass!”~ Fred and Molly Weasley from a Very Potter Sequel
“They can be real hard ass dick heads.” –All the kids cover their ears- “What’s the matter with you guys?” –Kids take hands off of ears- “Oh S*!” –Kids cover ears again- “You guys are just kids! I’m gonna have to watch my damn mouth around you little bastards!”~Reamus Lupin from a Very Potter Sequel
“My name is Draco malfoy...I am a racist, I despise gingers, and mudbloods, I hate Gryffindor house and my parents work for theman who killed your parents doyouwanttobemyfriend?”~Draco Malfoy from a Very Potter Sequel
“That’s Delores Umbrige…I heard that one time a dementor kissed her, AND IT DIED!"~Shamus Finnigan from a Very Potter Sequel
“I haven’t seen you since you were a little baby. Didn’t you grow up into a sexy little bitch like your father.”~ Dumbledor from a Very Potter Sequel
“And from that moment forward, I’d lift up anything thing that I could find, and I’d hoist it over my head! and I ate nothing but protein shakes, falcon eggs, and ROCKS!”~Prof. Umbrige from a Very Potter Sequel
“You just gotta –unsheathing sound- take this knife, set it upright on a chair, and SIT ON IT!” “Excuse me m’am.” “WHO DIRESPECTIN DA UMBRIGE? YOU WANNA DIE SHLONGBOTTOM?!”~Umbrige from AVPS
“It's just like that time that everyone told me, 'Hey, Dumby, you have to expel Tom Riddle from Hogwarts ‘cuz he's evil, and I just told them to stuff it, and everything just sort of worked itself out”~Dumbledore from AVPS
“That textbook is like 1,000 years old. It still refers to Dementors as Ring wraiths!”~Professor Lupin from AVPS
“Excuse me, I have to go and vomit.” ~ Hermione from Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince
“Ok, but if you get blurry vision, have Brake take you to the doctor!”“Or the Zoo!”“The zoo?”“I love the zoo!” ~Fallon and Hadley from A Mermaid Tail
“Oh no no no no no. You just pissed off a severely hormonal pregnant woman. LET’S DO THIS!” ~Nora from Cheaper by the Dozen 2
“HI, sorry I was late. I was just cleaning out your safe ^_^!” ~Parker from Leverage
“My first girlfriend turned into the moon.”“…That’s rough, man.”~Sokka and Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender
“MY CABBAGESS!!!!!!”~The Cabbage guy from Avatar: The Last Airbender
“You are such a nerd.”“I prefer the term intellectual badass.” ~Iggy and Jess from Ravenwings.
“Chief? We all play by the same rules.”“Says who?”“Says the whole room who’s about to go “Lord of the Flies on you Ass.”~Audrey Parker from Haven
“I don’t-”“Shut up and kiss me.”~Chuck and Sarah from Chuck
“SON OF A BULBASAUR!!” ~Ash Catchem from Stupid Mario Brothers
“AWW SQUIRTLE SPIT!”~Ash Catchem
“SECON COUSIN OF A JIGGLYPUFF!!” ~Ash Catchem
“FREAKIN FARFETCHED!!!”~Ash Catchem
“AWW POLIWAG POOP!!”~ Ash Catchem
“And me as well -puts hand in the center- FIVE SIX SEVEN EIGHT TUNA HELPER!!!!!!” ~Ash Catchem
“Hey guys! I thought you might get hungry so I got you some TACOS!”~Princess Peach from Stupid Mario Brothers
“COOKOO!! COOKOOO!!! I GOT A COOKOO!!!!!!! i got a cookoo!”~Link from Stupid Mario Brothers
“Basically he just told you to *Censored BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP* with a koopa on Tuesday.”~Mario from Stupid Mario Brothers
“Hey Mario! Give me my master sword back!”“Oh sorry Link! I was just looking at it and it was just so nice and beautiful and shiny! @$$ hole!” ~Link and Mario from Stupid Mario Brothers
“You are now under my control! Go make me some waffles!! MUHAHAHAHA!!!!”~ Me and My bro’s Girlfriend
“Today, I was dared by a friend to walk up to this guy who I've never met and pretend I knew him. I walked over the kid, enthusiastically greeting with a hug and claiming "it's been too long!" The kid proceeded to hug me back and carry out the conversation as though we were old friends from camp and discussed how "Frank" was doing. At the end of the conversation he gave me his number and told me to keep in touch. I think I'm in love.” ~ My life is average. com
“I just wanted people to know that Barney kids grow up.”“To be dirty little girls!” ~Neil Patrick Harris on American Idol
“I heard it go CHICK GOOOOOG. GDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!! DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD OUUUGHHH!!!!~Adam Savage from Mythbusters
“I take a certain glee when we use items for way they were never intended intended.”~Jamie Hydamen from Mythbusters.
“When in doubt…C4!”~ Jamie Hydamen
“Our death ray doesn’t seem to be working. I’m standing in it right now, and I don’t seem to be dying.”~ Jamie Hydamen
“In your face conspiracy theories!”~Tori Balachi from Mythbusters
“Go ahead and say it! It’s because I’m Jewish!” ~ The alien from the Simpsons
“Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.” ~ Unknown (But it’s FUNNY!)
“I used to have a voice like Justin Beiber. Then I turned four.” ~My sister.
“Did you just take that out of Nate’s pocket?”“Yes.”“What did you get?”“Well, this looks like a news letter, and this must me his pay check.”“How much did we get?”“$71.13!” “MUHAHAHAHA!!!!!”~ Me and my friend Allison
“My name is…well…really embarrassing and long. My name is Bonzoo Pipinpapscilopocopolous the third. My friends just call me Bonzoo!”~Me
“Hey, it’s not every day you parents ask you to forage your brother’s signature on an important school document!” ~ Me
“Cause, the last time I carried an “Empty” bottle of wine to the recycling, it dripped on my shirt and I was given weird looks all day!” ~Me
“That gopher’s AWESOME!! He can pull those flowers RIGHT THROUGH THE GROUND!!! That Gopher PWONS YOU GOPHER!!! WHAT NOW?!?!~ Me. long story. It’s got something to do with gophers and Mt. Saint Helens
“And that’s where communists come from!” ~ My dad
Also, I'm a Christian. If you aren't you can skip over this next piece.
For those of you who are, read this.
For Mature Eyes Only:
Why do we sleep in church,
Right now I have a bunch stories. I think their good. If you like them, leave a comment