NCIS.smut.BONES
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Joined 01-28-09, id: 1819492, Profile Updated: 01-28-09
Author has written 1 story for NCIS.

Well hello all, and welcome to me humble abode.
Just because of the... well, let's call it 'explicit content' of my fanfictions, I like to remain anonimous however I love when people talk to me and I always answer back so you can PM me at any time (once I figure out how to use fanfiction PM, that is).

I'm in fanfiction under a different name and if you guess correctly to whom I really am, then as a reward I will confirm that and write you a song about how good you are. :P

Now onto the good stuff:
This is my place for smut.
Pure smut. 100 lovin'
If you don't like it then don't read it but if there's one thing I hate on the internet, it's flaming and unconstructive critisism. Critism can always be constructive so if you have a problem - articulate it properly and clearly and tell me what I can do to improve because you can only get better.
I am always open to fic suggestions and I love it when people throw me ideas.

Important:
I try my very hardest to keep my work in-character and tasteful. Too often when reading smut do you get out-of-character swearing and the use of the word 'Cock.'
The word 'Cock' means absolutely nothing to me. It is a horrid (I know, horrid?) word that just should never be used. We're all mature here, it's called a penis.
Another thing, I just don't see strong women like Ziva David or Temperance Brennan 'teasing his cock with her mouth.' And I do not even begin to invision alpha-males Anthony DiNozzo and Seeley Booth 'licking-out' these women.
I'm sorry - I realise that sex scenes don't exist in neither NCIS nor Bones however if a fic is phrased these ways, it will more than likely result in my departure.

-NCIS-

Or more acurately, Tony and Ziva

I live for this show and I breath for these characters. Call me what you want for it, I honestly don't care because it is the truth and there's absolutely nothing you can do about it.
Michael Weatherly and Cote de Pablo are -hands down- the most wonderful and talented actors on the planet and their characters only heighten their brilliance and parallel the awesome.
The frustration and sexual tension is tangable and it drives me absolutely insane. I am sexually frustrated half the time because these two just don't get their act together! The sexual frustration that I feel sometimes serves me well in that it results in another smut-fic.

Best moments from Tony and Ziva:

10. The 'Sandblast' bomb-disarming scene
Season 4, Episode 7
Not worth dying for? Hell - I'm a chick and I would still tap that - Cote de Pablo is HOT. Still - wasn't it awesome when he followed her?
9. CUR
8. CUR
7. CUR
6. The 'Family' bathroom scene
Season 5, Episode 2
Was she trying to get him to see clearly? Dear Lord, how many times much she hint. She was just looking out for him and he was being a prick. Still, it made for an awesome scene and some great quotes came out of it.
5. The Soulmates in 'Designated Target'
Season 5, episode 8
Do you ever think about soulmates, Tony? Well, that episode revealed what Ziva was feeling. Infact, she really does hint a lot what she feels. I just hope that Tony has not screwed with his chances. I mean, when he's ready will it be too late? Then entire episode was amazing; so many Tony and Ziva moments, so little time.
4. Under the covers in 'Under Covers'
Season 3, episode 8
Because THAT was definately not you knee. And then she kisses him. It was perfect. Just amazing.
3. The 'Judgement day' Autopsy room scene
Season 5, Episode 19
Wow - This really was an amazing moment. Thank God they opened up. Wonderfully written. I would kill for another moment like that - sure, I adore the Elevator scene however this really is a wonderful scene. I've watched it so many times that i've lost count.
2. The 'Under Covers' kiss scene
Season 3, Episode 8
And so the Tiva is born. It begins. That kiss was hot - his hands at her nape, her pulling off the dress. Who saw THAT coming?
1. The 'Cloak' Elevator scene.
Season 6, Episode 8
Best character interaction in the entire series so far. Just amazing. What was not to love?

I'll leave you now with:
TIVA FOR THE '09!!

-BONES-

Or more acurately, Booth and Brennan

Where Tony and Ziva drive me crazy, Booth and Bones keep me sane.
Not for long, however. They are a sexless marriage. And that shits me because sex is enjoyable and I want the two best looking people in the universe to hurry up and enjoy themselves.
Let's first give a moment to David Boreanaz, who is - without a shadow of a doubt - the most attractive man in the entire universe. Past. Present. Future. Emily Deschanel is a close second to Cote de Pablo, however.

Booth and Brennan have been dancing around the main focus for near 4 years and thank God that come the end of this season, something will happen. It has been rumoured that this 'waking up naked together' storyline is just an Alternate-Universe-bitchy-weak-dream-sequence; and if that is the truth, I will be pissed and there will be blood.

David and Emily to an amazing job of keeping the tension fresh, entertaining, and most of all, real. The way David looks at her when he plays Booth is uncanny, it doesn't even look like something that can be acted out; it's just phenominal.

Best moments for Booth and Brennan:

10. The more than one kind of family
9. The Skating in the rink
8. The Hot Blooded in the Apartment
7. The christmas tree at the Prison
6. The Verdict in the Story
5. The hug at the Altar
4. The 'making love' speech in the Diner
3. The cheek-kiss in the hospital
2. The rescue from the Gravedigger
1. The Kiss under the Mistletoe

I'll leave you now with:
B/B FOR THE '09!!

Compromising with the Inevitable reviews
Of all the things Tony and Ziva wanted to do with their Saturday nights, being stuck on an aircraft carrier with one another was not one of them. Still; when God gives you lemons... OneShot. Smut. M Rating for situation. Tiva.
NCIS - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,406 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/30/2009 - Tony D., Ziva D. - Complete