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Author has written 3 stories for Super Smash Brothers.
My name is Joey Sandders (That's Sandders with two D's) and I have come to eat your soul!
Just kidding! I've actually come to entertain you with fanfics that I shall create and publish onto this website.
My real name is actually Jostin (That's Jostin with an O) Asuncion and Joey Sandders is the pen name I use for my OC (for those of you who don't know, that means Original Character). I'm the guy on the right of the picture.
As you see, me and two of my cousins created this humongous idea about a world full of people with different abilities (VERY original right! XD) called Xhevix.
Xhevix focuses on three major characters named Jose "Joe" Ashter, Andrew Plasma, and Joseph "Joey" Sandders who are high-class members of an organization called X.H.E.V.I.X. which stands for (Extraordinary Heroes Each Varying In Extravagance). Joe (19 yrs. old) is the leader of the group who eventually became the Chief after the four previous chiefs turned evil and made a group to try to overthrow Xhevix (Yes, Xhevix is terrible at finding good chiefs). Anyways, Joe is the cool, think-before-you-act type who has photographic memory. Andrew ( 21 yrs. old) is the smart-guy of the group, though he hates to admit it. He has the ability to fly and he's smart. In fact, he's so smart that he can gain the knowledge on how to use a specific thing as a weapon (like a leaf, or a pen, or a boulder, or human hair, etc.) Lastly, but not leastly (XD), there's Joey (Yay me! Starring London Tip... ughhh! Curse the Suite Life! They've got it stuck in my head! Anyways, I'm 17 yrs. old) my OC. He's the laid-back kind of guy who seems to be the burden of the group. Though the fact that he's one of the three members of "Class A" was because of his "Inner Demon", an evil alternate ego named Justin Serewani who states, "... I am the yang that completes Joey's yin. Without me, he and I would crumble. But more importantly, I will not be able to finish what I started 500 years ago. Corruption still plagues the streets of this planet and I plan to put an end to it ALL!" end of quote. But eventually, Joey tamed this inner him and has proven himself (to his friends and foes) that he is a worthy adversary. Joey has the ability to change wind into fire and visa-versa and he can also create force-fields.
These three characters focus on stopping the plans of all opposing groups who plan on threatening the lives and welfare of others... especially against Joe's uncle, Kingstere Trilive! (insert thunder-and-lightning-suddenly-striking-in-the-background-animation here)
Basically, that's a summary of the humongous story. IT'S JUST TOO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT!!
And this story of ours (me and my cousins') will be the central idea for most of my fanfics
Now I want to give a shout-out to a person who inspired me to make my first fanfic,! Make sure to check out his story, Subspace Emissary's Worlds Conquest. It's one of the best Super Smash Bros. fanfics I've ever read! (I just love cross-overs! and SSB is the one that comes closest to a video-game cross-over... which I shall call a VGCO).
NOTICE: I AM CURRENTLY WORKING FOR A WEBSITE, SO UPDATES WILL UNFORTUNATELY BE SLOWED DOWN. SORRY.
Finally! My Super Smash Bros.: Dark Matter fanfic's fourth chapter is done! The chapter is set on the Dainty Lady and a lot of things are gonna be explained in this chapter (I'm probably not gonna make any other chapter on the ship because it would take too much chapters to finish the Monkey Island arc). This mainly focuses on Sora because this story needs to follow up with the KH story a bit (and I love the enemy he's facing) :D !! Sorry to all the MI fans expecting more hilarity from Guybrush, that'll be settled in the next chapter. Oh yeah! Special treat for all the MI fans out there, something any Monkey Island reference should NOT be without! Two of my accepted relationships are also in the story, BTW. Well, that's all I can say about this chapter, really... other stuff are explained in the chapter... But overall, this story has some things added that I planned on but are a complete mystery to others, like the history of the Founders of Life (which I'm making a story of, called Super Smash Bros.: Alpha Universe which will explain the history of Master Hand, Tabuu, the Ancient Minister, and seven other people. Also, this story will help you understand the sequel of SSB: DM which is called Super Smash Bros.: Entity of Light which I shall soon be planning on.) Oh well, hope you enjoy this chapter! R&R! Notice: This story is on hiatus for now because I am working on a bunch of Sonic stories!
I have made my Sonic Truth or Dare fanfic and it's successful... well, more successful that my other stories anyways... but it's a ToD fanfic, of course it's more successful! It's called, Sonic: Truth or Torture and it was specifically designed to teach authors like, and how to torture the Sonic Cast properly! I'm pretty sure any of my family members who will read the Truth or Dare fanfic will kill me, so here's to life! GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD!! XD Special thanks to for being my first reviewer! Cheers to you, man!
I am doing a survey for the top 20 greatest VG villains called Who's the Greatest Video Game Villain Ever? for a future project that I will be doing. It will depict who the people think are the most badass out of all the villains in VG history! Submissions for the story can come from any video game you know, it's just that the rules for the survey are listed in the first chapter. Go check it out if you have an idea of who the worst villain out there is, and I don't mean that the negative way! I currently have a Top 20, but I probably will keep it a secret until further notice.
I'm currently planning on a REAL Sonic story. It focuses on the story of an OC I had just recently created (thanks to the help of an OC Competition story I reviewed for fun). It will come out soon, but don't worry SToT fans, it won't postpone the Truth or Dare fanfic! I shall keep the details a mystery for now but await for the soon to come action-packed story, The Dark Tale of Nothingness!
Speaking of OC's, aside from the Sonic story which I plan to make, it was only at this specific time when I'm typing this part of my Profile that I wanted to do something that involves other peoples OC's! Another author who calls himself, aka DD, inspired me to do so with an OC Comp story that he updates once a month. When I think up of what to do for that story, expect to see a pandemonium of characters be stringed together through means of words on a computer screen typed down by the twisted mind of a 15 year old psychotic reader and writer who loves to make fun of everyone and everything he sees on the ultra-powerful being which is called the INTERNET! Rawr! Fear me! XD
One of my cousins () has noticed that I have joined FFNet. Good for her to notice! XP BTW, She's Joe in Xhevix, she's technically my "boss" in the story. I've also noticed that she's told you guys about the "999 Characters" plan (Dammit! I was planning to tell you guys soon! Oh well. :P). Anyways, the primary reason why we did that was because one of my other cousins, David aka (who is Andrew), is planning to make this bracelet of some sort that has the numbers 001-999 on turns-dials that will be a lot of help for something random! XD Way to go Trish! XD XD XD XD XD XD XD
WORD CURRENTLY ON MY MIND: Meme: A unit of cultural information that represents a basic idea that can be transferred from one individual to another, and subjected to mutation, crossover and adaptation.
COPY AND PASTE AREA:
If you fell for this please put it in your profile, I fell for it too:
You know you live in 2008 when...
1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.
2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years
3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is because they don't have a Yahoo account or a My Space account
4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV
6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.
7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.
8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.
9.) and you were too busy to notice number 5.
10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.
11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.
12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Oh really?! Thanks! I'll remember to not read whatever you guys write, too!)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(And the other use would be?)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or your genitals.
(Has anyone ever broken this rule?)
I've seen this for a while and I just can't help but to paste this here because I love cats!
If anyone's wondering, I'm NEVER going to add in any of those "Copy and paste this onto your profile" stuff that almost everyone on this site has because I like being different! ... ... ... copy and paste this onto your profile if~ I'M JUST KIDDING!! Only an idiot would betray his own rules! Are you an idiot?
The only reason I have the following copy-pasted things above this is explained here:
-The first one was added because I did fall for it.
I was bored so I tried to translate "I cannot speak X" into several different languages so...
-1337: I FAILZORS TEH 1337 SPEEKZ!!1one!!1!
-Albanian: Unë nuk mund të flas shqip.
-Arabic: لا أستطيع أن أتكلم العربية.
-Bulgarian: Не мога да говорят български език.
-Catalan: No puc parlar català.
-Chinese (Simple): 我不会讲简单的中文。
-Chinese (Traditional): 我不會講傳統。
-Croatian: Ja ne mogu govoriti hrvatski.
-Czech: Nemůžu mluvit česky.
-Danish: Jeg kan ikke tale dansk.
-Dutch: Ik kan niet spreken Nederlands.
-English: I cannot speak English.
-Estonian: Ma ei räägi eesti keelt.
-Filipino: Ako ay hindi nakapagsasalita ng wikang Filipino.
-Finnish: En voi puhua suomea.
-French: Je ne peux pas parler le français.
-Galician: Eu non podo falar galego.
-German: Ich kann nicht German sprechen.
-Greek: Δεν μπορώ να μιλήσω ελληνικά.
-Hebrew: אני לא יכול לדבר עברית.
-Hindi: मैं हिंदी नहीं बोल सकते हैं.
-Hungarian: Én nem beszélek magyarul.
-Indonesian: Saya tidak bisa berbahasa Indonesia.
-Italian: Non posso parlare italiano.
-Korean: 한국어를 말할 수없습니다.
-Latvian: Es nevaru runāt latviešu valodā.
-Lithuanian: Aš negaliu kalbėti lietuvių.
-Maltese: I ma jistgħux jitkellmu Malti.
-Norwegian: Jeg kan ikke snakke norsk.
-Persian: من می توانم فارسی صحبت نمی کنم.
-Polish: Nie mogę mówić po polsku.
-Portuguese: Não posso dizer o português.
-Romanian: Nu pot să vorbesc limba română.
-Russian: Я не могу говорить на русском языке.
-Serbian: Не могу да говори српски.
-Slovak: Nemôžem hovoriť slovensky.
-Slovenian: Ne morem govoriti Slovenskem.
-Spanish: No puedo decir el español.
-Swedish: Jag kan inte tala svenska.
-Turkish: Ben Türkçe konuşmak değildir.
-Ukrainian: Я не можу говорити українською.
-Vietnamese: Tôi không thể nói tiếng Việt.
-Ye Old English: Speaceth in mine own langvage of ye olden tymes, it cannst be done by mineself.
That will be all for now. If you want a language added in, just PM me!
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
WHAT IS 2+2?
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
HOW WILL YOU DIE?
WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
FAVORITE SUPER SMASH BROS. BRAWL MUSIC BY GAME:
Super Smash Bros. Brawl:
Super Smash Bros.
Super Mario Bros.
The Legend of Zelda
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG
TOP 5 CURRENT FAVE BANDS WITH MY FAVE SONGS FROM THEM:
5. Three Days Grace ("Animal I Have Become", "I Hate Everything About You", "Just Like You", "Never Too Late", "Pain", "Riot", "Wake Up")
... and a SPECIAL mention!!
0. Unnamed for now (Previously Crossover/3CKO) Me and my friends' band! Crossover was dropped because of copyright reasons and 3CKO was just stupid (besides, the member who decided on that name is quitting the band meaning we have to find a new vocalist)
-All Men Must Fall (Heavy Metal)
Members of the band:
Dylan (Lead Guitarist, Rhythm Guitarist)
Robert (Vocalist, Rhythm Guitarist)
Chose 10 of your OC's or ten of your favorite people (like friends, family, celebrities, etc. Anyone you think is cool). But you can't chose yourself.
1: Joseph Sandders (the real version, not the ToD version)
Note: Everything is erased from everybody's memory once they get something done in this list for the next question (except for certain occasions).
1) 4 invites 3 and 8 to dinner at their house. What happens?
She can't invite anyone because OC's 1 through 9 live in the same mansion. I can understand why she'd cook Marvin dinner, but Ana's inclusion is completely unexpected. Go secret relationships!
Domina: I cooked dinner for tonight and it's your favorite, Marv.
2) 9 tries to get 5 to go to a strip club.
LOL!! Justin would TOTALLY do that! Shadow's gotta learn to stop being a wuss and get laid already!
Justin: Come on, doofus! You know you want to go!
3) You need to stay at a friends house for the night. Do you chose 1 or 6?
Doesn't matter. They both live in the same mansion.
Me: Hey, guys. My mom and dad agree that I can sleep over here for the night. Do you have any extra towels, clothes, and maybe even a toothbrush?
Benny and Nina are in a relationship, so there's no surprise there. Ragnarok, on the other hand...
Ragnarok: (walks into the room and glares at the couple)
Marvin in a relationship with Lux?! AND, on top of that, Ana's jealous?! HAH!! I laugh! Unlikely, but this might be funny to type down a short script for...
Marvin: For some strange reason, I am now in love with you, Lux.
I wouldn't mind if Domina jumped me in an alleyway! She's a fun-loving character and is probably only playing around with me. Besides, she likes Marvin. Well, let's see who rescues me...
Me: So, Domina... how are you and Marvin holding up?
7) 1 decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later, what is happening?
Joey and cooking? This won't end well.
Joey: And welcome, everyone, to my new cooking show, Sandders' 101 Recipes for Instant Success! First of all, you should have all of your kitchen equipment ready and kept in a safe area! Don't put them on the edge of a counter like this or else they will... (knife falls down and almost stabs his foot) O_O!! Yeah, never do that or else THAT will happen!
Shadow crashed his van? Sad, sad Shadow... and to make matters worse, he's paired off with Justin again! What did the wimp ever do to deserve this sort of treatment?
Shadow: (in a body cast) What did I ever do to deserve this?!
It's a good thing Domina's on that list. I wouldn't know what to do if she wasn't there! But seeing as Justin's in the list, I just had to laugh!
Marvin: (blushing) Um... I have to tell her the truth... I-I just have to! No... she'll just turn me away... but I've seen some hints of her having the same feelings as I do... That's it. I'll tell her the truth! (turns around and crashes into Justin and falls on his butt)
Nina kidnaps her own boyfriend to force Shadow to give something up? Okay then...
Shadow: What's the whole point of this, Nee? Why'd you pluck poor Benny of his wheelchair?
I'd prefer to meet Joey because he's awesome in every way! Lux is a cop and we all know how boring they are...
Me: Hello, Joey! I come from the real world!
Ragnarok challenging Domina to a chariot race seems funny as it is...
Ragnarok: (glares at a shaking Domina)
Against Ragnarok and possibly even Justin, no. Everyone else, yes. He's the oldest person on the list and one of the strongest persons, too!
Joey: Let's all gang up on Marvin for no apparent reason!
14) Everyone is invited to 2 and 10's wedding except for 8. How do they react?
Now THIS is wrong... Benny and Ragnarok? Seriously? Married?! I know just what to do about this!
Ana: I feel sad for Benny... He's forced to have a homosexual marriage with Ragnarok... I wonder who even caused all of this...
Hahaha! Why is 6 afraid of 7? GENIUS!!
Nina: Hey, Lux!
(stomach explodes from laughing too much) Reggie ACTUALLY telling his enemies a "fairy tale"?! That's just TOO much! And one of the funny things about that is the fact that the real Ragnarok can't talk, so he'll have to portray the fairy tale the only way he knows how... in creepy manners!
Joey: Oh (bleep)! It's Ragnarok! What do we do?!
You're still talking about Benny and Ragnarok's gay wedding?? Wow, you're persistent! I can understand why Joey was late for that wedding... Poor Benjamin...
Benny: What did I do to deserve this...
Shadow and Justin getting drunk? I can see it happening... But, since they're going to MY house, this will be a problem...
Me: (opens door) What have you done to him, Justin?!
Marvin and three of the girls?! Why does he get to be the pimp when he's the timid one?! Oh, cruel irony! Well, let's see what happens in the zoo during Marv's birthday bash...
Marvin: (blushing a lot) Where are the other guys?
I know what they'll be protesting to me about! This will be pretty simple.
Everyone (including Ragnarok if he could talk): Let us live our own lives! Give us free will! Let us live our own lives! Give us free will!
Actually, Justin cannot do this. If he kills Joey, Justin will not be able to exist for a yang cannot exist without its yin. Let's just see what happens...
Justin: (reloads his rifle and wipes the blood off of his face) Hehehe... Goodbye, Joey Sandders.
This is a sibling thing and everyone knows how THOSE turn up! Let's read on, shall we.
Ragnarok: (suddenly appears in the form of shadow-melding)
Fail at life? Wow, this meme is cruel... But I know just who to use!
Shadow: Oh, COME ON!! ME?!
I feel so sad for Shadow... That is all I have to say for the poor dude.
Shadow: I'm lost... I knew I shouldn't have tried to take a shortcut! Hello! Is anybody there?!
Marvin starts a day camp. That's what happens.
Marvin: Okay, kids! You can go to the main cottage and eat your lunches now. Make sure to be back an hour from now.
All the girls, eh? Okay then.
Domina, Lux, and Nina: You do the hokey-pokey and you turn yourself around. That's what it's all about.
I don't know yet, but hilarity is sure to ensue!
Joey: Hehehe! Now I shall make Justin grab Ragnarok's butt and Ragnarok blush from the action.
Could be. Nina doesn't usually cook, let alone bake, but I think she'd be able to make a good pie.
Nina: Hey, Benny! I baked you a pie! (a screaming face suddenly appears on the pie as if it were an evil spirit trying to push its way into the world of the living)
Hmph... Guess I was wrong...
I can't imagine Marvin forgetting to bring food... Especially if the food were sushi, he'd bring baskets and baskets of it! That man sure loves his sushi...
Ana: Wait a minute! We forgot to bring any food!
Yes. I have watched the Blair Witch Project. Awesome improv. acting, I should say. Let's see what happens...
Ana and Marvin: (munching on berries)
They do what everybody does best when there is nothing to do!
Everybody (including Ragnarok, for some inexplicable reason): (dancing the Caramelldansen)
PHILOSORAPTOR'S DEEP, EXISTENTIAL, PALEOLITHIC QUOTES AND QUESTIONS:
What would happen if Pinocchio said, "My nose will not grow."
A man with one watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never quite sure.
Even though I know nothing, I at least know that I know something. Thus meaning I actually DO know ONE thing. Which means I am back to zero, as the thing I thought I knew is actually not true, causing me to know nothing at all.
Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect. Why practice?
When I am, death is not. When death is, I am not. Then why fear what I cannot be?
If I say, "... and shit." after stating my every activity, how do I tell someone that I just took a shit without it sounding funny?
Even if I choose not to decide, I still have made a choice.
All things are subject to interpretation. Whichever interpretation prevails at a given time is a function of power and not truth.
Is a key still a key if there's nothing to unlock?
If you force sex upon a prostitute, is it rape or shoplifting?
Why did the Flintstones have Christmas?
Most people are afraid of death, yet the same people won't want to live forever.
We avoid risks in life so we can make it safely to death.
Why do they sterilise needles used for lethal injections?
If actions are stronger than words, why is the pen mightier than the sword?
The Game: How can I lose if it is not a game. For you see, a game is something you can win and you can lose to, but here, I cannot win.
Philosoraptor's biggest foe yet: The next sentence is true. The previous sentence is false.
The first man who ever milked a cow... WTF was he doing there?
Two wrongs don't make a right, but two Wrights make a plane.
If money doesn't grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?
If a robot does "the robot", would it still be called "the robot" or just "dancing"?
A day is one rotation of the Earth on its axis. God created the universe in six days. Before he created the Earth, hod did He know how long a day was?
That which is hard to do is best done bitterly.
If you're not part of the solution, you are the precipitate.
Why is /b/ faster when it is being spammed?
Why do they call it "taking a dump" when you're actually leaving one?
If they squeeze olives to get olive oil, what do they squeeze to get baby oil?
Sanity will only impede you.
... It's like an atheist, that works at a Christian book store...
If police proportionally benefit directly from illegal activities, how do we tell them apart from the "criminals"?
He who twitts a lot has both got nothing and a lot to do in his life.
Do I exist because there is porn of me, or is it that because I exist, there is porn of me?
Why date when one can rape?
Is the cake a lie?
If I try to lose the game and succeed, do I win the game?
If CP is posted and no Mods happen to see it, did it really happen?
You must have CP inside you to give birth to a dancing star.
Are we human or are we dancers?
Which came first? The advice or the dog?
Even a clock that does not work is right twice a day.
If /b/ has so much cancer, why not leave?
RANDOM PHILOSOPHIES OF THE DAY:
When life gives you lemons, make apple juice, stand back, and watch the people try to figure out how you did that.
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you've ever done what you did.
If you cry, I will cry. If you laugh, I will laugh. If you fall off a cliff, I will laugh harder.
Before criticizing a man, wear his shoes and walk a mile, because by then, you'll be a mile away AND you'll have his shoes.
There are three kinds of people in the world: Those that can count and those that can't.
All work and no play makes one rich.
If a tree falls in the middle of a forest and nobody was there to witness it, the other trees will be laughing at that one tree that fell down.
People are just like Slinkies: They always look funny falling down the stairs.
9 out of 10 doctors would agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot.
The guy who made up the philosophy, "Nothing is impossible." never tried slamming a revolving door.
The early bird always catches the worm but the second mouse always gets the cheese.
One night, I laid down on my bed and stared up at the bountiful and beautiful stars and wondered to myself, "What happened to the roof?"
The most successful video on the internet will always be porn that involves defecating and vomiting.
Where in the nursery rhyme did it EVER say that Humpty Dumpty was an egg?
Also, where in the nursery rhyme did it EVER say that Jack and Jill were getting their pail of water from a well?
If there is one thing I am sure of, it is that I am DEFINITELY sure of something.
If someone throws a rock at you, move out of the way and don't stand there like an idiot.
If an irresistible force meets an immovable object, they'd both say, "Hello." to one another and go their separate ways.
If you break a mirror, you will get seven years of bad luck AND the unnerving sense that you now know that you are ugly.
Life is a comedy for those who feel, so take off your clothes and start the tickle-fest.
An apple a day will make us all fat in the end.
If two stars die at the exact same moment in close proximity to one another, which black hole would suck the other one in first? Would a black hole be able to suck a black hole, even? Where would the celestial bodies being sucked go in first? There are too many questions about black holes. Never divide by two zeros at the same time.
Pigs DO fly... when you shoot them out of a cannon, that is.
What you see is what you get. That, of course, means that the blind get nothing.
Should you be worried if you read on a sign, "Beware of Dog" after you've passed the dog so as to read the sign in the first place?
A friend can become a fiend and all it takes is to take one thing away.
The pen is mightier than the sword ONLY in terms of writing on paper.
If you cannot progress forward, somebody cut your legs off.
Ten copy cats walk together in single formation and the last one gets hit by a runaway car that is long gone before they realize what has happened. What do they do? Eight of them follow the one copy cat who's laughing his head off, of course!
Between a rock and a hard place, you will find Homer Simpson stuck to a wrecking ball.
If you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth, that man over there is not your dad and your mom never made love to a human being.
Fire was discovered when a caveman was struck by a lightning bolt.
RANDOM CONVERSATIONS OF THE DAY:
(My friend, David, talking to my other friend, Dylan)
(My friend, Adrian, was trying to think of an epic video to post to Youtube)
Kevin (my friend): Why are you being nice to Faye and not me?!
Adrian: OH MY GOD!! THE TEDDY BEARS HAVE COME BACK TO RAPE ME!!
(Dad takes crab stew out of microwave)
(From Crocodile Dundee, a movie)
(Charlie the Unicorn)
(Same Charlie video)
(Charlie the Unicorn 2)
(Charlie the Unicorn 3)
(Same Charlie video)
Dylan: We should totally make a death metal cover for Mary Had a Little Lamb! Anton can growl it!
Me: The world is filled with weird people!
(Some random Pokemon spoof video on Youtube)
(Same Youtube video)
(Some random Left 4 Dead spoof video on Youtube)
(Same Youtube video)
Me (to Dylan): About that idea for Mary Had a Little Lamb, I have a better one! Let's make a screamo version of Rock-a-bye Baby!
Me: The most epic facepalm would have to be smashing your face into a falling palm tree.
Ed Wynn (American Comedian and Actor of the 1900's): A comedian is not a man who says funny things. A comedian is one who says things funny.
Me (while playing Sweet Home Alabama on Guitar Hero with a character designed as a ninja): OH MY GAWD!! A NINJA PLAYING COUNTRY MUSIC!!
Adrian: Oh yeah, by the way, you lost the game.
Guybrush Threepwood (in the new Tales of Monkey Island game series): Prepare to meet your frosty carbonated maker, LeChuck!
Guybrush: Booyah! Look out, LeChuck! Here comes Guybrush Threepwood's glowing sword of hot monkey vengeance!
EVERY SINGLE LINE FROM WAYNE'S WORLD!!
(Me and my family are eating out in a Chinese restaurant and we are given some fortune cookies)
Me: My mind is slowly careening into a state of mental retardation...
Adrian: Did you hear about Billy Mays' death?
RANDOM EVENTS OF THE DAY:
David crawled through the window of Adrian's house because he was too lazy to go through the door.
My friend, Anton, was wrapped in a blanket and sleeping on his couch when Adrian and Dylan just suddenly pounced on him and started whacking him with pillows. I joined shortly afterward.
I randomly screamed in the middle of everybody when we were playing Brawl.
Some skater dude bailed while trying to do a trick on wet concrete.
Adrian, Dylan, David, Kevin, and I slammed the door into Sean's face and Adrian shouted, "Door pwnage!"
Tank from Left 4 Dead shoots off into the distance after he gets affected by the Turret Launcher Glitch.
My mom got addicted to a jigsaw puzzle game so much, she didn't notice when everyone greeted dad, "Happy Father's Day".
Me and my dad tried to think of as much Disney animated movies (not including sequels to the movies) we could without the aid of a reference. We amounted about 44 right answers and 19 wrong answers. All in all, there are 77 animated Disney movies already made and in the works.
David (no, not the first one. This is a different David. This also isn't my cousin) had a big bag of Cheddar Cheese Doritos and some Timbits which I just grabbed and ran away with.
Faye had a heatstroke. This is in no way funny and was very depressing because it was her birthday today, on June 24.
Had to go to the dentist and almost had a heart attack when the dentist broke her seat.
As I was waiting at a bus stop, I looked around and noticed that the people that were around me were comprised as follows: A bunch of old ladies, 6 gangster-type guys, 2 emo-type guys, an autistic person and the person helping him around, and a man dressed up as a Shaolin Monk. You've read that right. A Shaolin Monk.
My mind went numb for no apparent reason... other than learning about all the games announced last E3! They're all AWESOME!!
I watched Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and I have to say that in comparison to the first movie, it was funnier and more action packed! Though I liked the story of the first movie better, I suggest that you watch this movie because it's just that plainly awesome!
I've finally finished my five chapter montage! I'm so happy I could just die! I'll tell MJ hi for y'alls!
I've recently joined a website called Know Your Meme that's founded and controlled by the Rocketboom Institute for Internet Studies. This will impede me from much of my useless time-wasting, therefore, I have less time to update. Sorry about this.
Basically that's it. I guess I'll see you soon then!
Your friendly, neighborhood Spiderman... uh ...er... I mean... free bird... urgh... whatever...
JSandders signing out!
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