adharmic
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Joined 02-08-09, id: 1831641, Profile Updated: 12-21-13
Author has written 9 stories for Office, Twilight, and Once Upon a Time.

Hi everyone, I had some issues with someone plagiarizing one of my stories a while ago, and while it's straightened out (and the vast majority of you are crazy cool and kind and awesome) I just want to place a notice on my profile: Everything in this profile (including story plots and dialogue) is my creation (except what I borrow from the books/shows) and copyrighted as such. The world is a much better place when we don't copy each other and it gives us a more varied fanfic universe for all of us to frolic through :)

Also, I just watched the entire Summer Heights High Series and I'm confused because I find the series really hilarious but also a little offensive due to the fact that the character of 'Jonah' is portrayed with brown-face. Just curious about what any of you out there who have seen the series think. PM me with your observations!

"I recall thinking that the computer would never advance much further than this. Call me naïve, but I seemed to have underestimated the universal desire to sit in a hard plastic chair and stare at a screen until your eyes cross.”- David Sedaris

I think we can all attest to that.

I won Judges Choice for my one-shot Lone Wolves in the United Colors of Twilight contest! In the words of Battlestar Galactica, 'Holy Frak!". You can check out the winners and the other amazing entries at...

http://community.livejournal.com/colorsoftwi/1346.html and http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2249079/ColorsofTwilight.

Banner for Lone Wolves (because the judges were cool like that): http://pics.livejournal.com/einfach_mich/pic/000468y2/s640x480

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Confessions of a Difficult Woman by einfach mich reviews
Leah Clearwater is not the kind of girl that goes for guys like Edward Cullen. In fact, she thinks he's an asshole and Edward's made it clear he hates her too. One drunken night changes everything. AU AH For the Parkaward Contest
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 35 - Words: 237,060 - Reviews: 1051 - Favs: 440 - Follows: 322 - Updated: 11/24/2013 - Published: 8/29/2009 - Leah, Edward
By Way of Sorrow by jaxington reviews
Bella Cullen has spent the last ninety-five years giving everything to protect her family and mourning the loss of her long dead human husband. A trip to Alaska to meet Tanya's latest romantic interest changes everything. The vampire she meets there has his face, his hair, and his body, but not his memories. It's a strange new world.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 188,468 - Reviews: 1827 - Favs: 1,188 - Follows: 1,207 - Updated: 6/30/2013 - Published: 10/15/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
La canzone della Bella Cigna by philadelphic reviews
A famous voice teacher. A mysterious piano prodigy. Backstabbing classmates. Music school is competitive, and aspiring singer Bella Swan is determined to succeed. Hard work she can handle, but who expected music school to be dangerous? A story in 3 acts
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 45 - Words: 336,125 - Reviews: 7296 - Favs: 4,135 - Follows: 3,783 - Updated: 11/9/2012 - Published: 6/9/2009 - Edward, Bella
Waterloo by spanglemaker9 reviews
I was defeated; you won the war. But how could I ever refuse? I feel like I win when I lose. Bella hates Edward…maybe. Written for The Faithful Shipper's Abba One Shot Contest. AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 38,135 - Reviews: 618 - Favs: 1,062 - Follows: 252 - Updated: 4/12/2012 - Published: 4/2/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Breaking News by WriteOnTime reviews
Two network news anchors. One desk. In a race to get the story, love might become the headline - if they don't kill each other first. AH Canon Couples, smart people, particle physics, and tap dancing.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 182,215 - Reviews: 7130 - Favs: 5,359 - Follows: 4,075 - Updated: 1/3/2012 - Published: 10/5/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Getting Warmer by eiluned price reviews
After their honeymoon on Isle Esme, Bella gets to spend more time being human with Edward as they travel cross-country to New Hampshire and beyond, and learn about art, love and temperature differentials. AU. BxE. Newlyweds being newlyweds, so lemons.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 17 - Words: 165,751 - Reviews: 757 - Favs: 1,076 - Follows: 655 - Updated: 5/15/2011 - Published: 11/8/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Tips for Better Living by adorablecullens reviews
Edward is a self-centered college drop-out, waiting on tables and living an empty life. Redemeption arrives in the guise of a quirky customer who offers him some much-needed advice for happiness. Does Edward have the character to rise to the challenge?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 52,342 - Reviews: 3233 - Favs: 2,811 - Follows: 1,881 - Updated: 10/28/2010 - Published: 3/4/2010 - Edward, Bella - Complete
My Love Shall Ever Live Young by Starshinedown reviews
The sequel to Aengus. When the love of your life is a god who holds grudges like no one you've ever met and is eyeballs deep in mythological intrigue, a fairytale ending can be hard to reach. All human. Rated M for a reason!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 87,958 - Reviews: 651 - Favs: 575 - Follows: 494 - Updated: 8/27/2010 - Published: 10/19/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Company Loves Misery by AngstGoddess003 reviews
AH-Edward, current recovering alcoholic, former bully of Bella Swan, must make amends to the one person who refuses to give them. Written for FGB Auction/WA Rehab. Adult Situations. Updated Wed/Sun.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 76,843 - Reviews: 6186 - Favs: 5,333 - Follows: 5,362 - Updated: 7/12/2010 - Published: 12/12/2009 - Edward, Bella
Sensitivity to Initial Conditions by giselle-lx reviews
Sensitivity to Initial Conditions-chaos theory : "An arbitrarily small perturbation of the current trajectory may lead to significantly different future behavior." Pre-Twilight AU. NO canon pairings. One-shot
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,692 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 19 - Published: 1/23/2010 - Complete
Type O Negative by quothme reviews
When the Cullens move to Forks, Bella thinks that the creepy new kid, Edward, has freaky yellow eyes. And that he's insufferably rude. Good thing he's in love with someone else. An AU dark comedy.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 54,164 - Reviews: 1274 - Favs: 1,645 - Follows: 447 - Updated: 10/11/2009 - Published: 5/3/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Cullen Family Players Present by Feisty Y. Beden reviews
The citizens of Forks appear in Sweded adaptations of your favorite cheesiest films, musicals, and sitcoms. Highly silly. M for language. No, really, this is really quite silly. You have been warned. So far: Vampire Speed, The Twitrix. More to come.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 10 - Words: 33,781 - Reviews: 204 - Favs: 67 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 9/29/2009 - Published: 4/9/2009
Innocent, Vigilant, Ordinary by Oxymoronic8 reviews
ON HIATUS. Bella spent the first two years of her life in Forks slowly falling for Jacob. As her senior year begins, a new family moves to town and she begins to question the difference between what she thought she needed & what she never knew she wanted.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 35 - Words: 177,984 - Reviews: 5573 - Favs: 5,136 - Follows: 4,523 - Updated: 7/19/2009 - Published: 7/16/2008 - Bella, Edward
Cowboys & Indians by Minisinoo reviews
Lessons on the road in a journey through time. Existentialism, a Texas pow-wow, a '67 Mustang, a bar brawl, Pocahontas, and Jack Kerouac. Sometimes, family is chosen, even if they're not who we expect. Jasper, Leah & Seth, Edward
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 19,891 - Reviews: 260 - Favs: 432 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 2/19/2009 - Published: 7/29/2008 - Jasper, Leah - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Halcyon Days reviews
David reflects on the tragedy of losing his daughter and the bittersweet reality that second chances often come too late. Father-Daughter angst. One-shot. Canon, David x Emma.
Once Upon a Time - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,495 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/16/2014
Entitled to Dream reviews
Originally written for the 55 Words to Leave Scranton Challenge on the More Than That website. It's easy for people to overlook what you actually are.
Office - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 81 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Published: 12/21/2013 - Kelly K. - Complete
Magnificent Mile reviews
Alice works as a gourmet chef for one of Chicago’s finest dining establishments. One night, her past arrives in the form of a man she only thought she never wanted to see again. Rated M for language.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 24,331 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 12/19/2013 - Published: 3/2/2010 - Alice, Jasper
For Esme, Forever Ago reviews
Second lives don't always bring about second chances. Esme is judge, jury, and executioner, and her methods have gone unnoticed and undisputed for the better half of a century. When a stranger enters her corner of the world, she'll find herself struggling to hold onto what she thought she knew and realizing how truly little she knows about herself. Esme X Carlisle, AU.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,907 - Reviews: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/17/2013 - Carlisle, Esme
Somewhere Like Here reviews
"I thought living in an idyllic small town was supposed to uncomplicate things...but now I'm raising a teenager and being driven insane by the interference of my friends, family, and a guy I can't stand. It's okay, I've always got the threat of my inn just being steps away from financial collapse." All our favorites in a fic that's inspired by the Gilmore Girls universe. E/B.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 43,681 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 6/29/2013 - Published: 8/17/2012 - Bella, Edward
Lone Wolves reviews
"What do you feel?"His answer was beautifully simple in its honesty. "You." Civil War era piece, Cherokee Leah and Confederate Jasper. Judge's Choice Winner for the United Colors of Twilight Contest! A-U, A-H, JxL
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,423 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 1/18/2013 - Published: 6/10/2010 - Jasper, Leah
Edward and Bella: The Lost Tapes reviews
A complete crack-fic exploration into what was lost between the lines of conversation within the Twilight Saga. An absolute aberration on the face of Twi-fic and you can tell me you hate it after you're done reading. Non-canon to the nth degree
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,861 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/7/2010 - Edward, Bella
Unblocking the Aisle reviews
Four-shot - Pam's journey to Jim did not traverse a clear cut path but rather through a series of occurrences in which she came closer to knowing what she needed. Jim/Pam, episode spoilers.
Office - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,520 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Pam B., Jim H.
Lunch is for Eating Your Heart Out reviews
Pre-season One: With impending change running wild in office, Jim is spurred into the best and worst revelation of his life: Over a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Rated for language.
Office - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,254 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 14 - Published: 10/12/2009 - Jim H., Pam B. - Complete