Author has written 39 stories for Buffy: The Vampire Slayer, Let the Right One In/Låt den rätte komma in, Glee, and Spring Awakening.
"Don't give me songs,
Give me something to sing about."
For general information, I only post here and on my LJ page (warped_in_time). Anywhere else and it's not me.
Authors Note 2014
Oh wow, I'm so sorry! I was aware I have been absent from this site and my stories for a long time, but I was not aware that for some reason my email had decided all of a sudden to put all fanfiction emails in my spam folder! Stupid gmail, grr. So yeah, I had missed all alerts for the past six months or something so I wasn't aware that there were people still reading my stories, let alone still asking for updates. So huge apologies! I will make a resolution this year to come back to my stories and get out some (very overdue!) updates. Sorry again, blame gmail!
Different Destinies, Constant Fate
27.01.12: A year later and I have finally updated. Go me.
Rendezvous with a Ghost
1.8.10 : Okay, I'm going to have to admit this story is on hiatus currently. I will finish it eventually (of course by then, no-one will probably care)
The Second Cut is the Deepest
1.8.10 : Again, this is on hiatus unfortunately. I will return though.
Musings of a Penniless Author
I decided to add a section to hold any and all niggling rants that pop into my head and won't go away - so ta da! And, perhaps unsurprisingly, a big passion of mine is the infamous Willow/Oz/Tara debate. I've read a lot of boards and people's opinions and arguments about Willow's persuasion and true love - and the major consensus that I come across is that people like both but believe that Tara and Willow are the best couple. Obviously a lot of that is just people's personal preferences, which is fair enough - just as I will always resolutely be a Willow/Oz shipper - but some of the arguments I just don't agree with. Something that really grates on me is this inference - and often downright assertion - that Willow and Oz just had a sweet innocent teenage love, but Willow and Tara had all the sexual chemistry. Yes, Willow and Oz were both young and (gasp) in high school when they found each other, but that doesn't mean it should automatically be written off as high-school sweethearts and nothing more. It doesn't matter what time in life people find each other - love can strike at any time and it makes it no less potent and powerful. Clearly, their youth and comparative inexperience meant that their love grew slowly, which made it all the more real and strong in my opinion, so obviously they didn't go in hot and heavy with the lust and sizzling tension that was played a bit heavy-handed in my opinion with Willow and Tara. And because the show split them up so early, just when both of them - and especially Willow who was just beginning to blossom and embrace her sensuality - were growing up and becoming full adults - there was so little time to see that side of their relationship evolve and mature. But passionate chemistry was definitely there throughout their relationship - mostly brimming just under the surface, built on the deep love, tenderness and respect that defined their romance.
I also really resent this idea that Oz was a nice romance but that Willow only found 'true' love when she met Tara. That he 'warmed her up' in a way, for the 'real' love of her life. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against Tara - she was a nice character and her relationship with Willow was sweet, caring and full of genuine affection and love. And I'm always a huge supporter of all positive and honest portrayals that increase exposure of gay/lesbian relationships. I don't know...maybe I just fell in love with Oz and Willow too much! But I just strongly and honestly believe that they are a better couple. That their love is deeper, stronger and meaningful - just a better match together. They complimented and suited each other perfectly - Willow's babbles to Oz's stoic silence! I always thought there was huge potential for their dynamic relationship and it definitely wouldn't have fizzled out - if only Oz had stayed to find out. There was no way they could ever just be friends. To quote a soddin' brilliant British vamp on another fateful couple; "You'll never be friends. You'll be in love til it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends" Though...they'd probably never hate each other - c'mon this is Oz and Willow! Again, no disrespect to Willow/Tara shippers. This is just my own strong opinion, and my reasons for it. Plus - this is my page - I can rant about whatever I want! ;)
Another argument put forward is that Willow didn't love Oz as much as Tara because she chose her over him. New Moon Rising has to be one of the most painful episodes to watch! There's so many conflicting emotions; joy at Oz being back even for only one show, mixed with the utter frustration and sadness at how things were forced to be. Oz had to leave because of the Initiative, and Willow picked/stayed with Tara because there was no way Seth Green was coming back for good. As is so often the problem with great shows, actors end up betraying their characters for their own careers. Which I suppose I have to grudgingly accept - but it still sucks big time. I'm just grateful he gave us Oz in the first place, and he lives on forever in fanfiction (if I have anything to say about it!) Circumstances forced everyone's hand; and Willow was obviously hugely torn up over her love for him.
As to the theory that Willow loved Tara more, that they were the true soul-mates, because she tried to destroy the world when Tara was killed - I'd say that, well, Willow was pretty much already on a dark, dangerous path and had been getting increasingly unstable for a while. She was only one step away from evil-veiny-killer witch, and that pushed her over the edge. If she had been as powerful with her magic and her and Oz had been together - I'm pretty damn sure she would have gone the same way. She showed the depths of her hurt over the loss of her love, when she tried to curse him in Wild at Heart, and she nearly became a vengance demon because of her destructive magic after he left. Magnify by a hundred times-more-powerful-Willow and you get an early glimpse of the Black Eyed Wicca and we would have definitely had another apocalypse if she had lost Oz for good in the same way. Don't know about other people, but I think there was pretty much no way Oz's abandonment wasn't also there in her mind during that dark, hopeless and vengeful time - driving knives into the already fragile wound of loss, plunging her on in her despair.
I think there is mainly agreement though that Willow's sexuality is fluid. It isn't a matter of straight or 'gay now', or Oz was a mistake and she only ever really loved Tara. People love who they love, most of the time it's the person themselves that attracts someone and creates the desire to form a relationship together- gender doesn't limit love. I would never say that Willow couldn't or shouldn't have fallen for Tara. A huge part of Willow's character is her openness and how much love she holds for everyone. I only hold true to my conviction that her and Oz were meant to be together, that they shared a powerful and true love, in a different way from what she experienced with Tara.
It kinda bugged me on the show that after Oz left, he was pretty much forgotten. I mean he got the odd mention, but for the most part it was like he had never existed. Like he wasn't important at all to Willow anymore. Which just seems very out of character, since he was such a huge part of her life and had a big effect on her. There was no way she'd forget him, or probably ever stop loving him. And it shouldn't be a case of - Oh Tara's dead, back to Oz! - really it should have been her realising her feelings all along and making the choice - even if Tara had been alive.
I just think Willow and Oz are the soulmates. And the course of true love never did run smooth! (A sentiment that I seem to be taking to extremes in my story) Their love is real, complicated and conflicted but always deep and passionate.
Rant over. Take from it what you will.
"Life's a song you don't get to rehearse,
And every single verse can make it that much worse."
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