Tifa Kori Kana
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Joined 02-21-09, id: 1846117, Profile Updated: 11-30-10
Author has written 4 stories for Twilight, Night World series, and Fruits Basket.

Yo!! There's more than just one person on this account so we'll tell you a little about each other. Yes, we're best friends.


Black, straight hair, light lavander (purple) eyes. Thirteen years of age. So many brothers and sisters we can hardly count them all. Romanian. Step dad with a whole room covered in Starwars toys. Yes, we mean the walls. Unfortuanatly, she knows Stars Wars things two. As in, beat her dad at Star Wars trivia. She's an expert in mythology, mostly in vampires, partially in demons.


Red, wavy hair, with green contacts. Twelve, turning fourteen in October. acutally, has been thirteen for almost two weeks now Has a little brother who will turn nine in one week. more like ten in four months American, but has cousins who live Germany. Favorite T.V shows are, "Land Of The Lost" and "Sledge Hammer."

We both love Twilight, Inuyasha, Ranma 1/2, Ah My Goddess, pretty much any Anime or/and Manga, Austin Powers, Adams Family, Date Movie, The Scary Movies.


Shoulder length, green hair, with dark shade of brown eyes that can see into your soul and memories... Thirteen years old. Love Tokio Hotel, Ramstein and ranting about her problems.

We all hate Kori's little brother(he is so annoying that sometimes you just wanna kill yourself.)

Tifa: I don't know how Kori can live with him, he's like a little demon.

Kori: It's true. At one time, he wanted to marry the bottom of my shoe, and he likes to lick me and Tifa. It's like living with my own personal Naraku!(for people who don't watch Inuyasha, Naraku is a sick twisted murderer, who is a demon and takes forever to kill!!)

Tifa: Naraku is so annoying, I mean Inuyasha and Kikyo were in love then he made it seem like they betrayed each other. So after Kikyo died and came back to life she wanted to kill, and I mean kill, Inuyasha.

Kori: Plus, we both find my dad super annoying! When ever I come home, I always ask the inocent question, "Did you miss me?" and he'll say "With every bullet so far."

Tifa: But your dad always teaches us jokes and riddles that confuse people like the thought riddle.

Both: I thought a thought. But the thought I thought I thought, wasn't the thought I thought. So if I had thought the thought I thought I thought... I wouldn't have thought so much.

Kori: True, not to mention, the knew one.

Both: Once I used to know a knew. Who had a nose for news, a nose for news no other newsman knew. But now he's gone, and even though I know another nosy knew, I never knew a knew that knew the news that that knew knew.

Tifa: Okay...

Kori: This is akward...

Tifa: Well...

Kori: Um...

Both: Bye for now! Hey stop saying what I'm saying! I mean it! Knock it off!

(Tifa and Kori look around the room both yell "www.shh.com... .org")

Kori: (whispers so Tifa won't hear) www.shh.com... .org isn't a real website.

Tifa: Kori, are you saying something?

Kori: No, I'm no-

Tifa: Zip it!

Kori: bu-

Tifa: Look, I'm ZIPpi longstoking!

Kori: Just lis-

Tifa: Ladies and gentelmen, exZIPIT A

Kori: Come o-

Tifa: wong shi tong ya lee, subtitle: ZIP IT!

Kori: Will you ju-

Tifa: Would you like a suckel of my ZIPel?

Kori :You're acting like a chi-

Tifa: (singing) When a problem comes along, you must ZIP IT (whip sound) ZIP IT good.

Kori: TIFA!!

Tifa: What?

Kori: Knock it off!

Tifa: Sorry, just reciting Dr. Evil from Austin Powers, movie two, The Spy Who Shagged Me. I know, I don't get the name either.

Kori: Shagged is the way Austin says dot dot dot.

Tifa: Yah, still don't get it, (Kori rolls eyes) Oh!!

Both: We got the Zip it and the www.sh.com... .org from Austin Powers, movie two, The Spy Who Shagged me. (Tifa and Kori turn to face each other.) Stop copying me! (You ever see sims get into a fight on the computer? Yah, that's what it looks like. Both pop up.) Ha! Fooled ya! We never fight.

Kori: Well... unless Tifa has a spaz attack,and goes all crazy and runs around the room.


Kori: Better go check up on her.

Tifa: (Thinking she's a zombie from Kori's room) KORI! HOW COULD YOU ABBANDON ME?! HOW COULD YOU LET THEM KILL ME?! I THOUGHT YOU WERE MY FRIEND! BUT NOW I'VE COME BACK FROM THE DEAD TO SEEK REVENGE! OH MOTHER OF ABBADON! YOU MADE THEM ATTACK ME DIDN'T YOU?! NOW I SHALL KILL YOU TOO! (Tifa's chasing Kori holding Kori's brother's toy snake yelling "REVENGE! I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!" while Kori running from Tifa yelling "BLOODY MURDER! SHE'S TRYING TO KILL ME!" Kori then reganes her senses and picks up a pillow and smack Tifa in the face with it. Then Tifa collapses on the ground, wakes up and says "Wow I had the wierdest dream, that you sent your cape and blanket to kill me, then I came back as a zombie and was trying to kill you... and the blanket... and the cape)

(One week later at Tifa's house the day before Kori's brother's 9th birthday, which we are celebrating at Tifa's house)

(Tifa and Kori are playing baseball with some of Tifa's many siblings. They are the ultimate team. Even though Kori is better because she uses her left brain and Tifa uses her right brain)

Kori: We're two halves of the same brain!! (Big smiley face!!)

Tifa: I may be tougher, but I just don't like sports as much as she does.

Kori: Yah, yah. Cut the small talk. We all know why their here.

Tifa: To talk about hot guys? But now that we're on the subject about our brainlyiness technically I'm the brain, she's the brawn.

Kori: Stick to the budget girl.

Tifa's little brother, Alexei: Kori! Your up!

Tifa: (in a deep announcer voice, grabs a baseball bat and starts talking into it like a microphone) Kori getting ready to bat. She's up at the plate. Oh no, Marriska's the pitcher. She'll never survive my sister.

Kori: Hey I heard that!!

Tifa: Marriska pitches the ball and Kori hits what seems to be a home run. She's flying around the bases. What's that thing in her hand? It seems, that she's still holding the bat!!

(45 minutes later, after the game, and a big cat fight between the two friends. Not to mention, one huge spaz attack)

(Tifa comes dancing in with a huge baseball bat singing "F-R-E-E that spells free. Creditreport.com baby!" She kicks up a chair then swings the bat making it fly out the window)

Tifa: Whoo! Home run! Yah!

Kori: Okay, now back to the hot guys. Tifa, why don't you tell them about your dad!!

Tifa: Okay, let's start with this. he's been married like, sixteen times. And has had three kids with each wife. He's really old, but he actually looks pretty good.

Kori: Pretty good?? He is hot!!

Tifa: Well, he does look like Orlando Bloom's twin.

(Guy who looks freakishly like Orlando Bloom, kneels down beside them)

Orlando Bloom look alike: You guys think I'm hot? Why thanks. (exits... somehow, though we don't know how)

Kori: (Puts arm around Tifa) Good thing none of our friends saw that. (Tifa looks to their left and screams) (Kori looks too and screams)

(There stands their best gal pals Tarrrie (TAR-IE) and her twin sister Gluey. Pretty much the rest of the school. Tifa yells "DADDY!!" then Tifa and Kori faint. "Daddy" comes in and picks them up and walks out with them.)

Random school girl: I didn't know Tifa's dad was Orlando Bloom.

Another random school girl: That must be why their so rich... that's it, isn't it?... I know it is!!

(with Tifa and Kori, now Conscious)

Tifa: Did you see that extremely hot guy?

Kori: But, you see your dad like, every day.

Tifa: Not my dad! You have a sick and twisted mind!! BTW I'm talkin about the blonde haired mega hottie that was hangin with our friends. They better introduce me soon.

Kori: Is all you ever think about guys? Besides, Cloud isn't all that hot. I like his brother Richard.

Tifa: What! How do you know them?! Woo I'm getting dizzy.

Kori: What are you doin? (looks back to see Tifa spinning in the computer chair)

Tifa: I'm fallin off!!

Kori: (rolls eyes) I know them, because I have to give them a tour of the school tommorrow.

Tifa: We look alike, I wanna swap places.

(Tifa runs into the bathroom, pulls her knee length hair into a bun, puts on a red wavy wig. And runs back into the bedroom, yelling "Where did I put those? Aha! I've found them!" she comes back out in, putting contacts in, that make her eyes green)

Tifa: See? I look just like you now! See! Here's my impersonation! I'm all sporty and stuff! I like to play soccer! And baseball! And football!

Kori: Wait, I hate football.

Tifa: (goes on as if she didn't get interupted) (Kicks door) Oweee! I think I broke my foot because I failed to kick down a door! (Starts runnin around the room, kicking stuff until she does brake her feet. Yes, I meen both of them...and both of her legs)

Kori: Are you okay?

Tifa: (pulls herself with her hands over to Kori. Calls her pet snake, wrapps it around Kori's neck.) I also like to kill people!!

Kori: You know we could just do it together. (She chokes out)

Tifa: (releases the snake and it crawls up Kori's leg and onto her arm and starts licking her cheek) Okay!!

(A month later, Kori is at her house alone)

Kori: (obviously, who would it be? Tifa?) Man, Tifa never does anything for our account! I have to deal with everything!! The complaints, orginize the reviews, type the chapters, everything! I assoiciate more with our fans than she does! That's why I put a Three Delivery picture up as our avatar. It's not that she hates Three Delivery, she sorta likes it. But, it probably wouldn't be her first choice. She'd probably rather have something like, Inuyasha, or, Twilight, or, Ranma 1/2, or, Ah My Goddess. But ha! I put up Three Delivery! (snicker insanely) And she'll probably never know, considering, she never comes on. It's all me, me, me. Sometimes I think I'm gonna go insane!! (Close up of her making a wierd face) Mwa-ha-ha-ha! My plan is perfect, real her in with bait, then, snap! The trap falls!

(While Kori is ranting about stuff that we can't understand, a masked figure sneaks up behind her and ties her up.)

Tifa: (appears from left side) Sorry, she does this sometimes.

(The masked figure pulls off the mask, to reveal, Kori's little brother Antonio!)

Antonio: Yah, no worries, she'll be back to normal by next week!

(A month later, once again Kori is alone at her house)

Kori: Man, Tifa made me change our avatar. It totally stinks. That's really all I have to say. I'm not in the mood to be funny.

(Nearly a year later, and Kori is at school, no worries, she'll make sure Tifa is with her the next time we update, at Halloween)

Kori: I seriously worry about that girl. Although, I really can't be mad at her this time for not being here, she's been sick the past couple days and the swine flu is going around so it could be really bad. Wish your best to Tifa guys!! I hope she gets better!! We're going trick-or treating on Saturday and it would just bite if she was still sick!! I really really hope she gets better!!

Kori's friend Sindy: You're worried about that?! What about all those spaz attacks she has? I'd be worried about those!!

Kori: You learn to deal with it. And shhh, we're in school!! looks around and everyone is staring at them

Two days later at Tifa's house Halloween

Kori: Haha!! Told you I'd get her to come back!! Say hi Tifa!!

Tifa: what ev!! i have been busy!! being rich is so hard!! so many people try to rob you!! i have to fight them all off. and with that and my spaz attacks, there is not much time left over!@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@

Kori: Tifa, are you on a sugar rush??

Tifa: Uuuuhhhhh... mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... Nooooooooooo.

Kori: Tifa...

Tifa: Yes?

Kori: Tell me the truth.

Tifa: About what??

Kori: Are you ON A SUGAR RUSH??

Tifa: Uuuuuhhhhhmmmmmmmmmm... Nooooooooooooooooooo.

Kori: Tifa one incredibly long name later tell me the truth.

Tifa: About what??

Kori: Tifa, you have exacly five seconds to tell me if you are on a sugar rush, or else.

Tifa: Look! A squirel! runs for the tazer/pez despenser

Kori: 5!

Tifa: OMG!! There's a rabbit.

Kori: 4!

Tifa: Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... Uh.. oh hi dad!

Kori: What where?! Oh yah, 3!

Tifa: He's right here. motions toward a sack of potatoes

Kori: 2! And by the way, your dad really isn't that cute, I still prefer Richard.

Tifa: Don't you call dad not cute!! I will call him down!! And he will have you star struck before you can say 'Hi Mr. Do'urden.'!

Kori: 1! Okay I warned ya!! Does something so terrible we will not show it

Tifa: Weehaaa Beats Kori off with her 'awsome' ninja skills

Kori: Well, that proves it, Tifa does have a sugar rush. Life is rough with her around.

Tifa: I do not have a sugar rush! Ohmicrod! It's a squirel!!

Kori! No... Tifa! Don't go near the... apple! No Tifa wait! Tifa! No Tifa! Nooooo!!

Tifa: Takes a bite of apple Mmm.. squirel meat tastes good... kind of like,... soup.

Kori: Tifa! You're not eating squirel meat! You're eating an app-soup? How in the all mighty universe does an apple taste like soup?!

Tifa: PSh, this isn't an apple, this is an apple! walks over to squirel picks up and takes bite.

Kori: Geez, do you have rabies?

Tifa: IDK... wait... wait... yep. starts running into the wall laughing insanely

Kori: Well, I gotta go and calm Tifa down now. See you next time!

Tifa: No! You'll never get me alive!! starts running into door

Kori: If there is a next time.

{At Tifa's thirteenth birthday party}

Kori: Finally! We're back! Did ya' miss us? We have a new girl on our sight! Her name is Kana, we describe her at the top with our discriptions! That's about all I have to say for the moment... get back to you if there's anything else.

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