Author has written 5 stories for Teen Titans, Harry Potter, and Twilight.
Kia Ora, my name is Nga Aroha. Well, it's not my actual name because then my mother would have to be arrested.
For anyone wondering, it is Maori for The Loves, which is the definition for my life. Lots of diversity, lots of different loves. My stories being one of them. I'm deep like that. Oh you wern't wondering? That hurts.
I'm one of those odd fanfiction writers who absolutely adores school and never wants to leave.
Personal info -
Age - A mature and beguiling seventeen. Reow.
Eyes - The brown-flecked green of a slab of greenstone, swimming with intelligence and the bitter memories of many a hard-fought battle. Or as other, less imaginative people call it, Hazel.
Hair - Auburn, with ringlets. Those whose who describe it as frizzy and ginger are clearly just jealous.
From - New Zealand. Contrary to popular the popular belief of many residing in the United States of America, it is not above Canada. Nor a state of Australia. Nor a small extremist Islamic country in the Middle East. Buy a map people, I'm starting to get upset. IT'S THE ONE BY ANTARCTICA. THE ONE WITH FOUR SHEEP FOR EVERY PERSON? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'VE NEVER HEARD OF IT?
Religion - Is stupid and tearing apart the world. Always has and always will.
Loves - Writing, day-dreaming, zumba, liquid courage in a safe environment, having a quiet think about the passage of time and the where I will go when I die, Sarcasm and ranting.
Dislikes - Men who awaken my inner creepy feeling, whores who arn't even funny, narrow-minded people, those who don't understand dry humor, and people who assume I am quiet around them because I am shy, when really I just fucking hate them a little bit.
Also when people talk about how freaky they are and omg the other kids at my school are sooo stupid and boring who wants to be normal? Dear Lord. No one is normal, it would be arrogant to think otherwise. Everyone has depth and never in a million years will you figure what makes them all tick. For all you know that girl who puts her hair in a high ponytail tied with ribbons in school colours and hangs out with (Deliciously) bitchy girls spends much of her free time writing fanfiction... not me though. I wear converse sneakers under my formal dress and laugh at birds in the park and eat highlighters and listen to indie music I doubt you've ever heard off. Don't hate me because I'm too individual and wacky. It's not like I claim to care less about fitting in with one peer group only to care desperately about fitting in with another without realising.
A little Harry Potter/Titans number I call Incandescant. I just posted it off the cuff. It's very raw and odd but I think that's when I'm at my best. Some people think my best is not very good. Yeah well, bleh.
-Falter, which I am currently drawing to a close. You know what I'd love? A Thousand reviews. I was told rather rudely it couldn't be done. I'd love it if you helped me prove that individual wrong.
-Heady. It's on hold, but for you resiliant little core of fans - Don't give up hope!
Characters I love, and characters I love to loathe -
Raven - My favourite character ever. You can just identify with her, you know? Even though no ones ever had her life, little things that happen to you relate. Once again, I bare my tortured soul to all you readers.
Edward Cullen - Doesn't actully exist and is making girls everywhere beleive someone like him does. Not the vampire part, the perfect, loving guy part. Hey, maybe there some magical guy out there who's close. Though I doubt it. On the plus side, there are a lot of abusive men just like him!
"Holy Crow Britney, those strangulation marks on your neck are exactly like the sex bruises Edward gave Bella! I'm so jealous! I wish Brad would hit me somewhere visible for once!"
"Thanks Coco, Chip let go after I passed out, that's why I'm still alive lol. When I woke up he was crying and said he was going to leave so he couldn't hurt me anymore. It was exactly like New Moon."
"You. are. so. lucky."
Bella Swan - Stupid Bitch. When you read that book, there are several times when I - and a lot of the people I have admitted this to - have wanted to kill her. She just gets everything she wants, without doing anything in return. She doesn't try hard at school, she doesn't plan anything. Stephanie Meyer just conveniantly makes everything work out when in the real world she'd end up in communtiy college studying nothing- because she doesn't like anything other than Edward and cooking and cleaning for her father who had been doing it for fourteen years before she showed up, even though when he tries to cook he can't figure out the noodles - with no money and going nowhere. But of course, becoming a vampire is the answer to all her problems, and she gets a magical, impossible, beautiful, intelligent child and endless years with her true love to boot.
Yes, I hate her but at least I can find solace in the fact that in the real world her genes would die out due to natural selection.
Jacob Black - I loved him as much as I could love anything in those books, at least I did him until Stephine Meyer turned him into a Pedophile! Is relationship with Renesme is gonna be all;
Jacob - You smell discusting, dirty bloodsucker.
Renesme - Thanks old man.
Jacob - I made out with your mum.
Renesme - You fucking did not!
Jacob - Shhhh! If Stephanie Meyer hears you she'll send the Vulturi to kill us! You know she hates realistic language!
Renesme - I'm sorry, what I meant to say was holy crow. *mutters* Jesuscuntmaryandjosephballs...
Jacob - What was that?
Renesme - Nothing. Hey, why don't I make you a sandwhich?
Jacob - Yes, what a Good little child-wife you have become. Almost as good as a slave.
Bella - She gets it from me! *wink*
Edward - Stop talking to them. You know you're not allowed to have friends. Not even your own daughter. Now if you had given me a son, that might be a different story. But now that can't happen, you stone-whombed harlett!
Bella - I'm so sorry Edward! I don't deserve you!
Edward- I'm going to my room to compose brooding music until Green Day replies to my letters.
You would think parents would be concerned about this and I'm sure some will - pausing to ponder the morality of such things while they book their eleven year old's next bikini wax and plan the next purity ball. Then they will shrug it off, certain that hiding contraception from their children and getting them to pledge their virginity to their fathers will ensure their children a healthy future.
The whole thing disturbs me. I'm not sure whether it's the plethora of mothers who think the whole thing is just wonderful when it's putting an abusive, co-dependant relationship where the guy is a manic-depressive who hates himself and thinks it's okay to kidnap his girlfriend in order to stop her hanging out with her friends, and the girl's entire self worth is tied up in her boyfriend to the point she has no other friends, and no other dreams than to some day marry and fuck him, on a pedestal. Or if it's the way the books are so horrificly Christian (Not if you're one of the rare Christians who use the religeon as a vehicle for love and charity). I mean, Vampires and Werewolves are everywhere, but not a gay person in sight? All abstinance, all the time? I mean dear god, the last movie was this cringingly pro-life bid to simultaniously make loads of money and suck out Robert Pattinson's soul. It makes me shudder and obsessively touch the books in the Hunger Games trilogy (They reassure me, okay?)
That said, if you've common sense enough to ignore its messages and a love of the word 'chagrin' the Twilight Sage is the perfect guilty pleasure for you.