Poll: In the light in his Eyes, should I follow Catalina, Fred and George through every one of their years at Hogwarts or just skip until the twins come into the story a bit more? Vote Now!
Author has written 8 stories for Maximum Ride, NCIS, Alice, 2009, Harry Potter, Captain America, and Percy Jackson and the Olympians.
Hey everybody welcome to Silentflier's profile page hope ya enjoy my stories! These are some of my first stories co written by friends so be nice;). Remember reviews are love!! Ok so alot of my profile is just funny junk so if you like that kinda stuff get comfy if you don't scroll right to the bottom and save about an hour. By the way I just finished watching 'Alice' on SyFy and I have to say it is my new favorite movie! To all of you who haven't watched it you totally should! Screw Twilight, I'm team Hatter!! Thanks!
Fave Stories plus possible fanfics
The Inheritance Cycle
The Hunger Games
Percy Jackson and the Olympians
Darkest Powers Trilogy
Fave T.V. shows:
Alice(this show rocks, I recomend it!)
OMG I totally LOLed when i read this! enjoy!
35 Things to do when your in Walmart! - UPDATED-
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look"
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
15.Grap alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go"
16. Pass out bananas to random people and snicker loudly when they take one.
17. Buy 350 cans of tuna and scream "THIS CAN'T BE RIGHT!! YOU HAVE TO PUT SOME BACK!!" when the cashier tells you the price.
18. Walk around looking confused in the CD section and ask people where you can find the CDs.
19. Start a fish-stick fight.
20. Walk up to random people, give them bear hugs, and say very loudly that you missed them and they never really did get that dandruf shampoo you recommended.
21. Jump in a cart and have a friend push you while you scream "The Germans are coming!"
22. Attempt to fly off a high shelf.
23. Run up to an employee and ask "Do you like me?" If they say no, yell out "You broke my heart, you evil monster! I'm telling the manager!" and start throwing canned tomatoes at them. If they say yes just to get you away, pat their shoulder, and say "What a shame because that girl over there" point to a random person "was just about to ask you to dinner."
24. Throw confetti on random people walking into the store.
25. Whisper "I know your 'little' secret" to people in the checkout lines.
26. Stand inside the freezer in the frozen food section.
27. Walk up to employees and whisper "I saw dead people...they want me to take you away...to aisle eight..."
28. Ask the clerk to make a page saying "If there is an Edward in the store, Bella is looking for you at the main info desk". (this works best if you love Twilight, and don't try with Maximum Ride)
29. See how many cans of frosting you can open and thoroughly lick without getting caught.
30. Go to a person with a shopping cart full of merchandise and demand a ride in the basket.
31. Practice your juggling with a few Grade-A eggs.
32. Squeeze the cream-filled doughnuts.
33. Walk into the baby clothes section, pick up a pink baby dress, then throw it down and run away screaming that the pink bunnies of doom came back.
34. Bow to the display of T.Vs in the electronics section.
35. See if you can move the bottom can from the gigantic canned beet pyramid
Reason the human race has evolved thus far.
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
FUNNY THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR
1.When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2.Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3.Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4.Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.
5.Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
6.Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
7.Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
8.Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
9.Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.
10.Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.
11.Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
12.Ask, "Did you feel that?"
13.Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
14.When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"
15.Swat at flies that don't exist.
16.Tell people that you can see their aura.
17.Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it.
18.Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"
19.Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
20.Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21.Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
22.Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
23.Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.
24.Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25.Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".
26.Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!"
Copy and pastes yay!
Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!
92 percent of American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your butt off.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile.
Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.
If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile.
My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend than copy this to your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile
If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile.
If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever ran into a tree, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you believe that preps travel in packs then place this on your profile.
Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.
If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy & paste this into your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile
If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile
If you've ever started laughing at something that is remotely funny and can't stop copy and paste this in your profile
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile
If you've ever burst out laughing in a detention or library or somewhere where it is supposed to be quiet copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!
If you secretly hoped to get a letter from Hogwarts when you were 11, copy and paste this to your profile.
if you are in love with a fictional character, ( cough, cough Fang!) copy and paste this onto your profile
fang: 98 human, 2 bird, 100 hottt!
If youve ever wanted to go into a book and slap/ scream at a character copy and paste this onto your profile
If you think Fang is hot...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, Insane Winged Girl, UPDRAFTGIRL37,silentflier
If you are like Max, copy and paste this onto your profile.If you relate everything to Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you still laugh re-reading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you want to see Maximum Ride (the movie) on the first day it comes out, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have an increasingly sophisticated and extensive vocabulary, situate this in your characterization
98 of the Internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2 that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.
If you generally crash on your couch even when your bed is free, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you've ever read/started to read a chapter in a fan fiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you love Max Ride and cannot live without it, post this in your profile.
If you are obsessively, uncontrollably, in love with Fang, post this in your profile
If you think Max and Fang should just get over themselves and get together already, copy and paste this into your profile. (YES YES YES!!)
If your friends think you’re crazy for reading a book about six flying kids (and their talking dog), and you don’t care, copy and paste this is your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.
If you'll take first watch copy and paste this is in your profile. (inside Maximum Ride joke.)
If you love the whole blind, pyro, mutant, baker thing that is Iggy, post this in your profile.
If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.
If you and your friend(s) break into song in public put this on your profile
If you were scared of the dark before reading Maximum Ride and now love black- outs and eclipses copy and paste this into your profile
If your favorite color was not black before reading Maximum Ride and now is copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile
If you're defying gravity, and no one can pull you down, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you are like Max, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you relate everything to Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you still laugh re-reading Maximum Ride, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile
Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.
If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you know how to spell and always remember the names of authors that you read over a year ago and haven't read since, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile
If you find yourself making fanfictions of your life/your friends lives/random people you know's lives/random people you know of's lives, post this in your profile.
If you find yourself making fanfictions of other fanfictions in your head, post this in your profile.
If you think rainbows are wonderful, post this in your profile.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.
If you dream in Maximum Ride, like, every night post this in your profile.
Copy this and paste it on your profile if you've acted out funny lines you've come up with for your characters without noticing it and have received many odd looks/comments.
Copy this and paste it on your profile if you think sarcasm is a conditioned reflex.
If you would kill to have wings, post this in your profile.
If you are the kind of person that gets really excited when you get like, two reviews, copy this into your profile.
If you are SO obsessed with Maximum Ride that it is not even FUNNY anymore, post this in your profile.
If you think the world would be easier if everyone was on fanfiction.net because--judging from the copy-paste thingys in the profiles--everyone dares to be different and doesn't care what people think, post this in your profile.
If you randomly check your email every five minutes while on the computer, copy this into your profile.
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that's weird. If you agree then copy this into your profile.
If you argue with yourself and lose post this in your profile.
If you hear voices of book characters in your head, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have / wish you had a dog, and wish he could talk like Total, copy this onto your profile.
If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer
If you know / knew someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever dreamt yourself killing off a fictional character so that you could steal her fictional boyfriend, copy this into your profile
Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you're part of the 8 percent that hasn't, put this in your profile.
If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven.
Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.
96 percent of teens won't stand up for Christ. If you are one of the 4 percent that will, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you cried when Fred Weasley died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile.
You know your addiction to Harry Potter is getting dangerous when you've added words like "Voldemort", "Hogwarts", and "Marauders" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done that, copy this into your profile.
If you loved DH, HBP, OotP, GoF, PoA, CoS, and SS/PS, and know what all those initials stand for, copy and paste this on your account.
One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books.I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him.
So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'
He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'
There was a big smile on his face.It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes.We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great.He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!' He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. 'Thanks,' he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began, 'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.' I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.
He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. 'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.' I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.
You now have two choices, you can :1) Put this on your profile or 2) Forget you read this and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice number 1.
There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift.
(I dunno who wrote this... but it's sweet.)
1. First thing you wash in the shower? My hair.
3. Do you plan outfits? Only if I need to look nice.
6. Do you say aim or a-i-m? a-i-m
8. Did you meet anybody new today? No
10. Do you floss? Every night.
18. Do you like yourself? Yeah, I suppose so.
22. How many countries have you visited? Just America. But I kinda live here...
28. Have you ever been in a castle? No but that would so cool.
30. Who sits in behind you in your math class? A kid named Roy.
31. Have you made a prank phone call? Yes, it failed miserably.
32. Do you own a gun? NO!
37. Ever been on a train? Yes.
40. Are you too forgiving? Not really, no matter who I have to forgive.
44. Ever have cream puffs? Yes! They were delicious!
48. What was the last CD you bought? The new Colbie Calliat CD for a charity.
49. Boys or girls? Boys? What does this question even mean?!
53. Ever walked into a wall? Yes, unfortunately...
55. Have you ever bought anything from Pac Sun? Yep.
56. Have you ever slapped someone? Yes. But they really deserved it.
59. Are you sarcastic? No I'm sweet and agreeable. No duh of course I am.
The Difference Between Friends and Best Friends
Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Friend: Will help me up when I fall down
Friend: Will bail me out of jail
Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Friend: Calls my parents "Mr." or "Mrs."
Friend: Asks me for my number
Friend: Hides me from the cops
Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public
This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do!(I don't even want to know how many I have done)
MAXIMUM RIDE FAN QUESTIONS:
2. Did you cry when Ari died?
3. Do you think Fang is hot?
4. How do you pronounce Ari's name?
5. Do you laugh every time you read the name Mr. Chu?
6. -SPOILER ALERT- In MAX, did you laugh hysterically when Total started talking about marriage?
7. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you squeal at all the faxness in MAX?
I squealed, OMG-ed and jumped around screaming, "FINALLY!!)
8. Did you angrily throw your book across the room when the flock split up?
9. Who is your favorite character?
It's a tie between Max and Iggy. They're both so awesome.
10. Do you like Jeb?
I sort of did, but when I learned he was an evil whitecoat I was ready to beat him to a pulp.
12. Did you think MAX was better than TFW?
13. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you get slightly fed up with Nudge and Angel's slight attitudes in MAX?
14. Which book is your all time favorite?
15. If the Flock had a theme song what would it be?
I can't think of one there are so many good one. One for Fang would probably be Kryptonite by 3 doors down though.
16. Have you ever imagined the flock as a band playing whatever song comes up when listening to your iPod?
Of course who hasn't?
17. Who do you think the voice should be?
Hmm maybe Jeb or the Director.
18. Do you think one or more members of the flock should learn to play an instrument?
Yeah I can see Angel on the piano, Nudge on the violin, Max on guitar, Fang on bass and Iggy on drums. I never eally saw Gazzy as the musical type.
19. What bugged you the most about TFW?
The school wasn't involved at all it was all about the atmosphere and the melting ice caps. I mean those things are important but it was the whole book for crying out loud.
You Know You're Obsessed With Maximum Ride When...
1. You're friends think you're crazy for being obsessed with six flying kids and their talking dog.
Now for quotes Yay! Again!
"Do you take this man and this horse as your ride out of here?!" "I do!!" Robin and Marian from the BBC show Robin Hood.
"We are all inner vegetables!" "I'm a mung bean!" ~Inherigirl and my friend Ani.
"Rawr I'm a zombie! I feed on the stupidity of the living!" :"How can you eat stupidity?" "You're making me hungry..." ~My friend Ani and her friend Nicole.
"Comfy?" "No." "Why don't you just put your arms around my waist. Let my body take the weight-" "No." Hatter and Alice from SyFy's mini series 'Alice'
"Do you know why they call me Hatter?" "Because you wear a hat?" Hatter and Alice from SyFy's mini series 'Alice'
"Do I need a reason to help a pretty girl in a very wet dress?" Hatter
"I.. I know a thing or two about liking people and in time, after much chocolate and cream cake, like turns into, 'what was his name again'." Hatter
"Finally! I missed you." Hatter
"Touch the lady and I'll shuffle your deck!" Random Oyster
"Do you trust me now?" "Completely." Hatter and Alice in the Casino
"Jack is a lucky guy..." "What?" "Nothing." Hatter and Alice
"You have no idea how happy I am to see you!" Alice
"Pieces of paper! Pointless." Hatter
"I have a thing about flying!" "Well I've got a thing about bullets!" Alice and Hatter
"Holy (insert swear word of your choice here.)"-Fang-MR-AE
"'You were designed to be very smart, Max,' she told me.'We electrically stimulated your synaptic nerve endings while your brain was developing.' (The director)
'I vill now destroy de Snickurs bahrs!' Gazzy barked."
I love Nudge, Nudge is a great kid, but that motor mouth of hers could have turned Mother Teresa into an ax murderer,"~Max
"For God's sake, Nudge, my ears are bleeding!"~Iggy
You... are...a... fridge...with...wings...We're...freaking...ballet...dancers! ~Fang-MR-SOF
"When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it."
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder
We're best friends. You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge; I'll pick out the funeral arrangements.
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
We look identical. She even had identical scars and scratches. She was wearing my clothes. How could you tell us apart?' (Max)
"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes."
Live dangerous…Run with scissors.
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive
Don't hate yourself in the morning-sleep till noon.
A piece of cheese could come up with a plan more cunning than that
Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.
Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.
Percussive maintenance - the art of whacking the electronic device to get it to work again
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.
Be a loser! Because being cool is so overrated
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject
I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends.
Boys are like slinkys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs
Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!
A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.
You're born an original, don't die a copy
Roses are red,
There is a woman at the beginning of all great things
The best things in life are unseen- that's why we close our eyes when we kiss, cry, and dream
There are all kinds of art. There's the art of drawing, the art of dancing, the art of science, and of course the refined art of being an idiot
Save the earth. It's the only planet with chocolate.
The light at the end of the tunnel is a freight train headed your way
The only way to make my PC faster is throwing it out the window.
If ignorance is bliss, then why aren't more people happy?
Sometimes I Wonder, "Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?" and then it hits me!
In a world full of cheerios, be a fruit loop.
There's nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with chocolate
And then the water parted...and fishes died...
There is no such thing as darkness, only absence of light...
Growing old is mandatory...Growing up is optional
I am temporarily distracted by a shiny object.
Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way; wisdom is looking both directions anyway.
Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call whatever you hit the target.
Where there's a will, there are five hundred relatives.
Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.
I'm a bomb technician, if you see me running, you better catch up!
I'm an angel honest... the horns are just there to keep the halo straight
Darn! I thought I had hidden the pitch fork, and did anyone notice the tail.
Don't dissect frogs... dissect elephants!
You are too sarcastic for your own good!
I dream of a better tomorrow, where Chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.
I'm going to go give him a piece of my mind, but not my brain I need that.
Must press the Red button!
That which doesn't kill you...will probably try again.
What doesn't kill me... Had better start running.
Best friends, it’s who we are . . . instead of saying "excuse me" we push each other out of the way and say "move". We hug each other and laugh at any random moment. We argue about the stupidest things then we find out we were both wrong.
Bad stuff happens, mostly to me, so don't worry.
Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.
You can't fix stupid.
It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.
A friend is like a flower,
If you are a serial killer, get the heck away from me! If you are a cereal killer, get the heck away from my Cheerios!
Even though he's gone, you can still hear the stupid.
Wake Up, Read, Eat, Read, Go to School, Read, Eat, Read, Go to Sleep, Repeat
Most people learn by observation, and there are the few who learn by experimentation. And then there are those who actually TOUCH the fire to see if it's really hot.
If annoyed further, I shall spork your eyes out.
We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls, we're really good at one thing, staying strong.
The night is a very dark time for me.
It's dark for everyone, moron.
NO! Not for Alaskans, or people with night vision goggles!
RAWR I'm a DORKASAUR
I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones
If you want something said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman.
I know the traffic signals by heart; green means go, yellow means speed up, and red means check for cops.
You have enemies? Good, because that means you've stood for something sometime in your life.
Life's journey is always easier when you hear a friend’s footsteps beside you.
Love starts with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear.
I am who I am. Your approval isn't needed.
Be yourself - it's the only thing people can't say you're doing wrong.
I'm sugar and spice and everything nice,
I did not hit you...I simply high fived your face.
Happiness is just around the corner; too bad the world is round!
Slinky + Escalator = Endless fun
Between two evils, I always pick the one I've never tried.
If you blow in a dogs face he'll get mad at you, but take him for a car ride, and the first thing he does is stick his head out the window!
I’m not saying you’re stupid, I’m just implying it.
A woman is like a teabag - you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.
Never bend your head. Hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye.
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart.
Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway.
Life is hard; it's harder if you're stupid.
Experience: That most brutal of teachers. But you learn, my God do you learn!
I'm bored ... run for your sanity.
Never do anything you don't want to explain to the paramedics.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
I am a grown up. Except, grown ups don't call themselves grown ups, they call themselves adults, so maybe I'm not a grown up yet. But that's okay, you get away with more if you're a kid.
The more I think about, the more I'm sure I've lost my mind. But, crazy people don't know they're crazy, so I guess I'm ok. But thinking I'm ok because I think I'm crazy is saying I don't think I'm crazy, so I may be crazy.
Guys are like stars... there are a million of them out there, but only one can make your dreams come true.
You're single. Make the best of it. It doesn't mean you're not good enough for anyone. It means no one is good enough for you.
SCREW HUGS! I'm gonna tackle you when I see you!
Of course I'm out of my mind... It's dark and scary in there!
Life is like a corndog. I don't know why. It just is.
On a scale of one to crazy, I'm a penguin!
Today I will be happier than a bird with a french fry
When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade
When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.
When life gives you lemons make apple juice and then laugh when people try to figure out what the heck you did.
When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate.
When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!
When Life gives you lemons, through them back, because I mean really? Who likes lemons?
When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.
When life gives you lemons, steal your brother’s apples
When life gives you lemons, throw them at your brother’s friends and hope it hits them in the eye.
When life gives you lemons, throw them back and yell ‘I HATE LEMONS YOU MORON!’
When life gives you lemons, say hey, I like lemons, got anything else for me?
When life gives you lemons make orange juice and sit back and let other people wonder how you did it.
When life throws you lemons... throw something harder back!
Unless life also hands you sugar and water, your lemonade is gonna suck!
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.
WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps... I tend to walk into walls, and off the occasional cliff.
Never knock on Death's door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that.
Right now I'm having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.
I'm not paranoid... WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?
Earth is the Insane Asylum for the universe.
I hear voices in my head, but that’s okay. Most of them are pretty nice
I'm probably in the sky flying with the fishes; or maybe in the ocean swimming with the pigeons; see my world is different!
I have to speak my mind because what is in my mind is always more interesting than what is happening in the world outside my mind.
When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.
I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
The world is full of crazy people. THEY MADE ME THEIR LEADER.
Shut up voices or I'll poke you with a fork.
Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.
The problem is you can love anybody you want, but so can he
The average woman would rather have beauty then brains because the average man can see better then he can think
Behind every successful man is a very surprised woman
Yes, I hit like a girl. You could too if you hit a bit harder.
The reason your mama told you not to hit girls is they hit back harder, and sometimes repeatedly.
When in danger, when in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout
STUPID = Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand
Life is like a pack of gum... I have yet to figure out why
If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching TV by candlelight
They say the truth will set you free, so why is it that whenever I tell the truth I get sent to my room?
God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls could flirt
If aliens are looking for intelligent life then why are you worried?
The spontaneous rally will begin at 1:45.
Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.
Boys are like purses - cute, full of junk, and always replaceable
Did you just call me a beep? Because a beep is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark is on trees. Trees are a part of nature. And nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful! Thanks for the complement.
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.
How fast do you go on the highway? As fast as you want, as long as you don't get caught by the cops.
If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
Join the army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.
Don’t mess with me: I've got a stick.
Some people are like lava lamps, fun to look at, but not very bright.
I like to run with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous.
I ran with scissors, and lived!
I'm the kind of girl who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday
When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
It seems that the only place where the dictionary went wrong was when it put boys before friends.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
Scatter me across the sky, and I'll shine all night, and just like a star, I'll end up falling for you.
When you are rejected, friends say: its ok you deserve better anyway! best friends go up to him and say: its because your GAY isnt it!
'Curiosity killed the mutant bird kid.'
Men, chocolate, and coffee are all better rich.
"Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."
Procrostinate now, don't put it off
42.7 of all statistics are made up on the spot.
My knight in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.
There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM...
Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn
When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back
A good friend will comfort you when he breaks up with you. A BEST friend will call him, whispering "Seven days..."
Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,
who calls you back when you hang up on him,
who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.
Or will stay awake just to watchyou sleep.
Wait for the guy that kisses your forhead,
who keeps your picture in his wallet,
who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,
who holds your hand in front of all his freinds,
who thinks your beautiful without makeup,
one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,
THE one who turns to his friends and says THATS HER!
EVER WONDER where we are heading...
Why the sun lightens our hair,
Why women can't put on mascara
Why you don't ever see the headline:
Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?
Why Doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows 98?
Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor,
Why the man who invests all your money is called a
Why there isn't mouse flavored cat food?
Who tastes dog food when it has a "new & improved" flavor?
Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?
Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
Why they don't make the whole plane out of the
Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?
Why they are called apartments when
If con is the opposite of pro,
Why they call the airport "the terminal"
MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright
until you hear them speak.
2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something
right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.
7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be
stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the
8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those
who got there first.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he
will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.
11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12
people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
ONE FOR THE GIRLS!
(1) A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman alive." the woman replies, "i'll miss you..."
(3) Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for
(4) Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
I'm human. I'm never happy with what I have. I'm always dwelling on the past, living in the present, or anticipating the future. I'm never just one personality, and if I try to stay with one emotion forever, eventually, I will burst. I take things for granted, whether it's my fortune, my friends, or just the fact that I'm alive.
I'm a teenager. I'm either trying deperately to stand out, or fit in. I can list something I would change about myself in the second you asked. I'm always experimenting, and trying things for the first time. I get emotional, I get insecure, I yell, I cry, and I truly believe what I'm going through is different from everyone else's experience.
I'm a fangirl. I obsess over boys, books, TV shows, films. I crush on famous guys, and I idolise famous girls. I can remember pointless facts, and I dream about where I am whisked away to meet the stars and the authors.
I'm ME. There is no-one else in the whole world who truly understands every quirk, flaw and talent I have, why I do everything I do, and why I like and know the people I like and know.
Copy and Paste this if you believe that while you can be categorised into groups, you will never truly be the same as anyone else.
List Of Things To Do:
1. See if bookworms bounce.
1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball
Percy Jackson Pledge:
I promise to remember Percy
NORMAL PEOPLE/PJO FANS:
NORMAL PEOPLE: rely on their local weatherman for the weather forecast
NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG!
NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings
NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or I'll tell on you!
NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid
NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY!
NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms
NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation
NORMAL PEOPLE:don't have this on their profile
Thanks for reading my pro. If you didn't then you saved about 15 minutes. Anyway enjoy my stories!
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