Author has written 1 story for Twilight.
Hey guys, Its been a looong time since i updated, and i don't know if i will, inspiration seems to have run from me screaming in fear. Sorry to disappoint you all, hopefully i will be able to come up with something soon.
YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...
You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. 'If I had an Apple, and Jacob Black had a Banana, would that make me his lemon?'
You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')
When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')
After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, 'Holy crap, this stuff is great for sugar highs...'
You live off of sugar and caffine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)
You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.
You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.
You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.
No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.
The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.
Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.
People think you have A.D.D.
You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.
You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.
You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason
Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.
And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.
(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of them)
Child Abuse: Sarah: I cried while reading this.
My name is Sarah
I am but three,
My eyes are swollen.
I cannot see,
I must be stupid,
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My parents so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren’t ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can’t do a wrong
I can’t speak at all
Or else I'm locked up
All the day long.
When I'm awake I'm all alone
The house is dark
My parents aren’t home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe I'll just get
One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie’s bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the far wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
I’m so afraid now
I’m starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door
He’s already locked it
And I start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"I’m sorry!", I scream
But its now much to late
His face has been twisted
with unimaginable hate
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While I lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor
My name is Sarah
I am but three,
Tonight my daddy
If you are against child abuse put this poem on your profile!
I saw this and just had to have it even though i changed it a little.
If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.
92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your asses off.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile.
If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you get bad grades and still get perfect test scores all the time, copy and paste this onto your profile.
Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.
If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not ,copy this into your profile.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.
If you ever looked at someone and asked them something, even though you clearly know the answer,just to see if they would notice,copy this to your profile.
If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.
A Guy and a Girl were on a motorcycle going over 100mph
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of brake failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.
i almost cried when i read that
A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE TO HELP STOP RACISM
This is Written by a Guy!!
We guys don't care if you talk to other guys.
We don't care if you're friends with other guys.
But when you're sitting next to us, and some random guy walks into the room and you jump up and tackle him, without even introducing us, yeah, it makes us kinda mad.
It doesn't help if you sit there and talk to him for ten minutes without even acknowledging the fact that we're still there..
We don't care if a guy calls >OR TEXTS but at 2 in the morning we do get a little concerned.
Nothing is that important at 2 a.m.
That it can't wait till the morning.
Also, when we tell you you're pretty/ beautiful/ gorgeous/
Don't tell us we're wrong.
We'll stop trying to convince you.
The sexiest thing about a girl is confidence.
Yeah, you can quote me.
Don't be mad when we hold the door open.
Take Advantage of the mood im in.
Let us pay for you!
don't 'feel bad'
We enjoy doing it.
Smile and say 'thank you.
Kiss us when no one's watching.
If you kiss us when you know somebody's looking, we'll be more impressed.
You don't have to get dressed up for us.
If we're going out with you in the first place, you don't have to feel the need to
We like you for who you are and not what you are.
Honestly, i think a girl looks more beautiful when she's just in her pj's.
or my t-shirt and boxers, not all dolled up..
Don't take everything we say seriously.
Sarcasm is a beautiful thing. See the beauty in it.
Don't get angry easily.
Stop using magazines/media as your bible.
Don't talk about how hott Chris Brown,
It's boring, and we don't care. You have girlfriends for that.
Whatever happened to the word 'handsome'/'beautiful'
On the other hand im not saying i wouldn't like it ether ; )
Girls, I cannot stress this enough: if you aren't being treated right by a guy, don't wait for him to change!!
Ditch his sorry butt, disgrace to the male population
Someone who will honor your morals.
Someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest.
Someone who will care for you even when you make mistakes.
Someone who will love you, no matter how bad you make them feel.
Someone who will stop what they're doing just to look you in the eyes...and say 'i love you' .and actually mean it.
Give the nice guys a chance.
Every Guy who isn't a jerk will agree with this,
CHECK IT OUT!!
1. For every rule there is a loophole to get around it
2. He who fights and runs away lives to fight another day
3. Good and evil are relative concepts
4. Humanity is soo overrated
5. If someone must be blamed make sure it's not you
6. Trust no one
7. Never offer a confession when a bribe will do
8. If fair means have failed you it's time to resort to foul
9. If at first you don't succeed , hide all evidence you tried
10. More is good, all is better
11. Kissing up is not an art form, it's a way of life
12. Hope for the best, plan for the worst
13. Never get caught
14. Friends come and go, but enemies multiply
15. If your going to hide, the best place is in plain sight