Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.
Oh my god. I made this account 5 years ago. I am just now rediscovering it and I am absolutely embarrassed. LOL
If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you think Edward Cullen is hot, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you want to slice out Jacob Black's organs, throw them into a fire, and do a native dance around the fire, for what he did in Eclipse, copy and paste this onto your profile.
92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile.
Even when you can’t see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.
If you are on Team Edward, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are absolutely in love with Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever wanted to be that little hyper pixie of Alice, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you think that Emmett absolutely ROCKS, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading and/or writing, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you cried, screamed, or threw a fit when Edward left Bella in New Moon, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that the Twilight books are the best books known to woman and man, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you are addicted to FanFiction, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you agree with Bella that life without Edward is useless, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever acted like a paranoid fool because you believe (or wish) that the Twilight characters exist, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've started having dreams featuring Twilight characters, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If several inanimate objects hate you, post this on profile.
If you've practically memorized Chapter 20 (Compromise) of Eclipse, put this on your profile.
If everytime you hear thunder you think or say "well someone got a home run", copy and paste this into your profile
I agree when people say girls rule now and 4ever. Copy & paste this in your profile if you agree
If you wish you could meet all your favorite celabritys, copy and past this on your profile
If you have ever given off the allusion of being drunk when you weren't, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.
If you've ever pulled on a door that said push or vise versa, copy and paste this into you profile.
If you consider your family strange, but love them anyway, put this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have way too many of these things, copy and paste this into your profile
If you have ever fallen upstairs, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you have ever slapped yourself on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile..
If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.
If you've ever asked a question that the person your asking couldn't possibly know the answer to, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs cpoy and psate it in yuor pofrile.
I KINDA FEEL LIKE A IDIOT...OH! WAIT! I AM AN IDIOT!
The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up.
He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism
A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know ands wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile.
I hate pop-ups. If you hate all the ads popping up while you're trying to read some story, copy this into your profile.
65 percent of Teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then read,.If you are part of the 35 percent who read more that watch TV then cut and paste this to your Profile.
If you had ever gotten writer's block in a sudden and random moment, copy this to your profile.
If you have a little voice inside your head that talks to you constantly and won't shut up, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you said it, copy this to your profile.
HEY ALL YOU PEOPLE! HEY ALL YOU PEOPLE! HEY ALL YOU PEOPLE WONT YOU LISTEN TO ME?? I JUST HAD SANDWICH! NO ORDINARY SANDWHICH! A SANDWICH WITH JELLYFISH JEEELLLYYYY!!
I LUV SPONGEBOB! but not as much as twilight!
Why America has some issues (Yes, I live there, but tough. These are all clever.)
1. Only in
2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places
3. Only in America...do stores
4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers,
5. Only in America...do banks leave
6. Only in
7. Only in America...do we use
9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to
One day Mrs. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at the local church. "Reverend," she said, "I have a problem: my husband keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It's very embarrassing. What should I do?"
"I have an idea," said the minister. "Take this hatpin with you. I will be able to tell when Mr. Jones is sleeping, and I will motion to you at specific times. When I motion, you give him a good poke in the leg."
In church the following Sunday, Mr. Jones dozed off. Noticing this, the preacher put his plan to work. "And who made the ultimate sacrifice for you?" he said, nodding to Mrs. Jones.
"Jesus!" Jones cried as his wife jabbed him the leg with the hatpin.
"Yes, you are right, Mr. Jones," said the minister. Soon, Mr. Jones nodded off again. Again, the minister noticed. "Who is your redeemer?" he asked the congregation, motioning towards Mrs. Jones.
"God!" Mr. Jones cried out as he was stuck again with the hatpin.
"Right again," said the minister, smiling. Before long, Mr. Jones had winked off again. However, this time, the minister did not notice. As he picked up the tempo of his sermon, he made a few motions that Mrs. Jones mistook as signals to bayonet her husband with the hatpin again.
The minister asked, "And what did Eve say to Adam after she bore him his 99th son?"
Mrs. Jones poked her husband, who yelled, "You stick that goddamned thing in me one more time and I'll break it in half and shove it up your ass!"
"Amen," replied the congregation.
Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods..
On Sears hairdryer:
On a bag of Fritos:
On a bar of Dial soap:
On some Swann frozen dinners:
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
On Nytol sleep aid:
On a Korean kitchen knife:
On a string of Christmas lights:
On a food processor:
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
On a Swedish chainsaw:
On a child's Superman costume:
Find a guy whos calls you beautiful instead of hot,
Who calls you back when you hang up on him,
Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,
Who holds your hand in public and in front of his friends and family.
Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you.
If you think thid is soo true copy it into your profile.
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Girl: Do you like me?
Girl: Do you want me?
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Girl: Would you live for me?
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile
A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle
Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!
Guy: No, this is fun.
Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.
Guy: Then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you, now slow down!
Guy: Now give me a big hug.
She gives him a big hug
Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.
In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste.
If ya can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.
Heaven doesn’t want me, and Hell’s afraid I’ll take over.
“He who stands on a windowsill to see how far out he can lean without falling is a moron.”
“When you’re down I may not be able to pick you back up but I promise I’ll be willing to lay down right next to you”
“Don’t judge a book by its cover or a person by their scars”
“It’s not until you’re broken that you know what you’re made of.”
“Tired of living and scared of dying.”
“It requires MORE courage to suffer than to die.”
“You said that you would die for me, you must live for me too”.
“To die is nothing but a long goodbye.”
My birthday is 8-12 i have a black shirt on...wow it acctually sounds like me! lol jk.. hobos are pretty cool though
1(Jan) - I shot
Pick the day (number) you were born on...
01 - a rock star
Pick the color of shirt you are wearing...
White - because im sexy like that
If you are good at annoying people (especially on loooooong car journeys) copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you ever get a random urge to start screaming copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever turned around and questioned how you got on those subjects after an entire conversation, copy and paste this in to your profile.
Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!
If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile
If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.
I want child abuse to stop, and if you do, too, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you can't stand preppy people who talk like this: "I like, can't believe, I like, chipped my manicure!!", copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever read a 750 pg book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you love reading really long books just for the heck of it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you ever were told to go somewhere and you forgot why and you had to go back to find out copy this into your profile!
If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile
Pluto was no longer declared a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was "Too small" and "Off it's orbit" for a couple scientists’ likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!
If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have ever said something and two seconds later, completely forgot, copy and paste this to your profile.
We now have the technology to copy human skin cells to test on for all cosmetics and beauty supplies. If you are against any type of animal testing, post this on your profile.
If you are against racism, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity.
If you've ever totally screwed something up so bad it isn't even funny, copy this onto your profile
If you get bored easily post this on your profile.
If you're obsessed with Twilight, copy and paste this list to your profile.
If you truly believe, there is an Edward Cullen somewhere for you (Doesn't mean his name has to be Edward Cullen), copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have ever seriously discussed the pros and cons of vampire/werewolf husbands with your best friend, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you have a long list of fictional book/ movie characters that you are in love with, but Edward Cullen is clearly at the top of, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you are the kind of person who walks into a door or wall, and then apologizes to it, copy and paste this to your profile.
If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this to your profile.
If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy and paste this to your profile
If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this to your profile
If you think that only losers hate/don't get Twilight, copy this to your profile.
If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, copy and paste this to your profile
f you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this to your profile.
If you agree with Bella that life without Edward is useless then copy and paste this to your profile
If you've ever spelled your name wrong, copy and paste this to your profile
If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this to your profile
If you check the internet 5 times (or more) a day to see if there's any new Twilight news, copy and paste this to your profile
If you think your best friend's crazy for not reading Twilight, New Moon, and/or Eclipse, copy and paste this to your profile
If you are a walking, talking twilight series encyclopedia and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile
If you have ever had an unhealthy obsession with any -or all- of the Cullens and you don’t want to admit it even though you know admitting a problem is the first step to solving it but frankly you don't want the problem to be solved, copy this onto your profile
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!
If you've ever tripped over your own toe, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever stood straight up, then fell down for no apperent reason, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever lost your sunglasses, then found them on your head, copy this to your profile.
If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever read past two in the morning, copy this to your profile.
you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.
IF EDWARD AND BELLA DONT STAY TOGETHER I'M GONNA HURT SOMEONE! Repost this if you agree!!
If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!!
OMC-Since Edward is a perfect angel, and God created angels, and Carlisle created Edward, into a vampire, so God is Carlisle. That and every one of us woke up, saw Carlisle, and thought he was God.
Lessons Learned in Twilight:
1. You can enjoy the banquet while resisting the wine.
When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.
You're just jealous because the voices in my head talk to me and not you.
I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.
I agree with the dictionary. girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
All the good ones are either gay, married, vampires or fictional characters in books or movies.
AACIBD is Addicted to All Cullen’s including Bella Disorder.
AV is Addicted to Vampires
ADHD is Automatic by Hyperness Disorder
When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back!
My night in shining armour turned out to be a loser in aluminium foil.
Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.
One day we will look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.
I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.
Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.
I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.
I live in my own little world- but it's ok, they know me there.
The dinosaurs' extinction wasn't until Barney came and they all commited suicide.
I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you
A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.
A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend already has a shovel ready to bury the loser who made you cry.
A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.
A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"
A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded
2. (feb)i needed
3.(mar)i ran naked with
5.(may)i had sex with
9.(sept)i ran shirtless with
-pick the day you were born on-
01.two bi chicks
02.a homeless guy
03. jacob black
05.Barney the dinosaur
06. edward cullen
09.my ex boy/girl friend
11. a movie star
12.the school slut
15.a crack head
21. mike newton
26.a glass of milk
27.the kool-aid man
28.a french fry
30.a evil boy aka emo!
31.jerry the snow man
-pick the color of the shirt you wearing-
whitebecause that hoe stole my taco
blackbecause im the sexiest beeoch alive
pinkbecause emmet told me to!
redbecause i bringing sexy back yepp!
brown because bella is my freind
polka dotsmy azz is perfecto!
purplecuz im gangsta my home skillett biscut lol!
graybecause im kool like dat
otherbecause i have double d's
greenim a freak'n tree hugger thats why!
orangebecause i look like lindsy lohan
maroonbecause im a preppy
turquoisebecause i love water yeah baby!
bluebecause edward dazzles me!
tye dyebecause im a fucking suba diver you got a problem with that didnt think so!
nonecuz i have a killer six pack
yellowbecause i want chips!!
-put it all together and laugh your head off!-
Do it one by one, don't look ahead!
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2.Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, or yellow?
3. Your first initial?
4. Your month of birth?
5. Which color do you like more, black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
7. Your favorite number?
8. Do you like California or Florida more?
9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).
Are you done?
If so scroll down
(don't cheat- -)
1. You are completly in love with this person
2. If you choose
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.
Black: You are conservitive and agressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: You are spontaneous and and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.
3. If your initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is is soon to blossom.
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relashonship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experiance a major life changing experiance for the good.
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soulmate.
5. If you choose...
Black: Your life will take on in a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides with you and would do anything for you, but may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7. THis is how many close friends you will have in a lifetime.
8. If you choose
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.
9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.
10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come before your next birthday!
YOUR REAL NAME:
Patricia(real) (everyone calls me janey)
YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 4 letters of real name plus izzle)
Patr-izzle or Jane-izzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal)
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and street you live on)
YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your middle name)
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (Your 2nd favorite color, and favorite drink)
YOUR ARABIC NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, 1st letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, and last letter of your middle name)
Arjrace (for both siblings names both start with c.)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (Parents middle names)
YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one of your pets)
Type your name with your nose:jaaney
Type your name with your knuckles: janey
Type your name with your name with your feet: jsaney
Type you name with a pen without looking:kamey
IF YOUR LIFE WERE A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE?
One Time- Justin Bieber
First Day at school:
One Step Closer-Linkin Park
Making Your New Best Friend:
Falling In Love:
Death of a Close Friend:
Getting Back Together:
Birth of Child:
Dont Stop Believin'-Journey
Okay some of those were perfect and some were the complete opposite...