topazeyes143
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Joined 03-06-09, id: 1857901, Profile Updated: 03-06-09
Author has written 1 story for Twilight.

HI IM SHAUNA AND I AM ONE OF THE BIGGEST TWILIGHT FAN'S I OWN ALL THE BOOKS AND READ THEM A THOUSAND TIMES.

I CAN'T WAIT TILL MIDNIGHT SUN.

I AM TEAM EDWARD OR TEAM CULLEN.

I THINK JASPER IS HOT, YOU KNOW THE STRONG SILENT TYPE.

Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!

'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO!

My goal in life is to have everyone I have ever come into contact with fall in love with Twilight series, and, more importantly, EDWARD!

You're intoxicated by my very presence

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Life was so simple when boys had cooties

I make the cowardly lion look like the terminator!

I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I could tell you what happened in the first chapter of Eclipse, but then I would have to kill you.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

Did you stab Edward Cullen with a pencil or what?

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepair to shatter.

Oh him? He just has the most ah-dorable eyes you could ever fall for, and the cutest smile that will take your breath away And he has the ability to make you laugh when when the world just wants you to frown

You know you live in the year 2000+ when...

1.) You accidentaly enter you password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) and you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

STERIOTYPES.

I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I’m a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude
I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer.
I’m A GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress
I’m a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone’s ass
I’m a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant
I’m FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual
I’m a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian
I’m a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie
I’m INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs
I’m a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math
I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare
I'm PUNK, so I MUST cut my wrists
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist
I'm IRISH, so I MUST be a alcoholic
I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a stupid ditz
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore
I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy
I have A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS so I MUST be dating them all
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd
I love RENT so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST believe in heaven.
Stereotypes suck! Copy, paste & add.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

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Sibling Love by What.happened.to.Ellie.Creed reviews
Collaberation with vampirefan17. Bella and Edward are step-siblings that hate each other. What happens when there's a spark? Canon Couples, AH, OOC, T for language and a few f-bombs.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,512 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 7/10/2009 - Published: 6/12/2009 - Bella, Edward
Karmacoma by SalvatorEh reviews
**PERMANENT HIATUS!** When Charlie marries Esme, Bella and Edward must learn to live together as step-siblings. The problem? They are off-limits to each other - sexually. Co-written between The Jazz Master and travelchica. AH, OOC. Rated M for you-know-what.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,676 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 125 - Follows: 201 - Updated: 6/26/2009 - Published: 2/4/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
enemies to siblings can there be more reviews
Bella and Edward hate each other when they were 15 but then there parents got married to each other. what about when they deside that they should have some fun but then something nither of them thought of would happen. up for adoption
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,087 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 12/6/2009 - Published: 5/30/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete