lionluver1918
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Joined 03-07-09, id: 1858865, Profile Updated: 06-26-10
Author has written 10 stories for Twilight.

THE AWESOMEST SONG IN THE HISTORY OF THE UNIVERSE!! : http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama/

If you think Jacob is pathetic and needs to give up on Bella plus go jump off a cliff (or whatever he has to do to die), copy and paste this in your profile

If you have ever copy and pasted something to your profile, copy and paste this to your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think Edward Cullen is hot, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you want to slice out Jacob Black's organs, throw them into a fire, and do a native dance around the fire for what he did in Eclipse, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Even when you can’t see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

If you are on Team Edward, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are absolutely in love with Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that Emmett absolutely ROCKS, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you cried, screamed, or threw a fit when Edward left Bella in New Moon, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are addicted to FanFiction, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree with Bella that life without Edward is useless, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've started having dreams featuring Twilight characters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

You know you live in 2009 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace.

4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7.As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

10. You were too busy to notice number five.

11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.

12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.

13. Put this in your pro if you fell for it. You know you did.

If you have a fan fiction account dedicated to reading and writing about Twilight, copy and paste this on to your profile.

If you have read this far, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've done at least one of these copy and paste things, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Arguing with yourself is normal, it's when you argue with yourself and lose that's weird.

There is no 'I' in team but there is in pie and there is in meat pie and meat is an acronym of team

92 percent of kids come from broken families, if you like COOKIES, copy and paste this onto your profile

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you do criticize them, you've walked a mile and have their shoes.

If you believe in God and Jesus Christ, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you believe in GOD, (which I totally do! :D), copy and paste this into your profile.

If you screamed over watching the Twilight trailers, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you daydream about Edward appearing in your life, copy and paste this into your profile.

'Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?'

'Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.'

'Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.' ..

'When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.'

"Aww... he is sitting with the other one, the one we haven't tamed yet." -Other Person

Remember what you just said, because tomorrow I am going to have a witty and sarcastic comeback and you'll be devastated then!

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

I'm not insane... i just do whatever the voices tell me to.

Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Life lessons learned in Forks:

The future is not always set in stone

you can enjoy the bouquet while resisting the wine

Verify news before doing something stupid

Love can be like heaven in the middle of hell

They can't make them like a Cullen any more

It's understandable for little kids to be scared of doctors. Especially vampire doctors!

Mythical creatures seem to like rain.

having a pulse is over-rated

Edward Cullen puts the Greek gods to shame

Real men sparkle

Hybrids are cool

'Vegatarian' has many meanings

Clumsy is not something to be ashamed of

Rain isn't an omen, just unavoidable

Hearing voices in your head doesn't mean you're crazy

you can lie in your thoughts

What's dangerous to the body is dangerous to the heart

stupid lambs and sick masochistic lions are good pairs

Everyone has a soul mate, even if it takes a hundred years to find yours

Imprinting can suck

Nothing beats an irritable grizzly.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight, that whenever you hear thunder, you think of vampires playing baseball...copy/paste this into your profile.

If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever thought of something funny, started laughing, and fell & hit your head on something hard, and ended up laughing harder than you were before, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you have read past 2 in the morning, copy this onto your profile

If you are addicted to copy and pastes, copy and paste this into your profile

If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed. ((yes! An apple a day! Which means to me...TWILIGHT EVERY DAY!))

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile (Hee hee, Twilight...)

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
-I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.

If you laugh at your own jokes, copy this to your profile.

If you are a RelientK fan for no good reason, copy this to your profile.

If Edward in the Twilight movie made you squeal, faint, or swoon at least once, copy this to your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you ever pushed on a door that said "Pull" copy this into your profile.

()()
(0.0) Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies)

If Edward Cullen has given you ridiculously high expectations for boyfriends, copy this to your profile.

If you're a Jesus Freak and aren't ashamed of it, copy this to your profile.

If "Charlieeeeeee! We're on a bridge, Charlie!" almost made you pee your pants, copy this to your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If, when you saw the Twilight movie, you screamed, hyperventilated, fainted, drooled, or forgot to breathe whenever Edward came on the screen (especially the first time in the cafeteria), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1915

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1915

Edward Cullen: Hotter and Spicier Than You since 1901

And then there's Bella Swan: Danger Magnet since 1987

I read New Moon and Eclipse and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD(screw that...I'm gonna knock him SENSELESS til he's dead. Especially after Eclipse)

If Bella and Edward don't stay together, I swear I'm gonna stab someone.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

TEAM ROSALIE: because deep down we all think she's awesome.

TEAM JASPER: because he can snap at me anytime.

TEAM ESME: because she's the coolest mother ever.

TEAM EMMETT: because we all love a guy with muscles.

TEAM EDWARD: because we wish all guys were this perfect. (I'M TOTALLY TEAM EDWARD!!)

TEAM CARLISLE: because all doctors should be this hot.

TEAM BELLA: because she's Edward's girl.

TEAM ALICE: because seeing things before they happen rocks.

I only have PMS on days that end in the letter "y".

Ociffer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God! (ome! i just reread it and i just now figured out what that means after about 10 minutes...)

Come to the dark side. We have Edward Cullen!

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur profile!

A Twilight Survey

Which book in the series is your favorite?

Breaking Dawn

How long did it take you to read the books?

About 2 weeks each to read Twilight and New Moon and a month and a half to read Eclipse and Breaking Dawn (I had the last 2 taken away for a while b/c i was reading them too much and didn't do my homework... hehe. oops!)

Who introduced you to the books?

Friends at school. I asked them what it was about and they said it was a love story about a human and a vampire. At first, I was like there's no way i'm reading about vampires! Then, curiousity got the better of me so i read them and decided i wouldn't become obsessed like everyone else. boy was i wrong... little did i know i would be more obsessed than the ppl who introduced me to the series in the first place! lol

Did you buy them, borrow them, or have them given to you as a gift?

borrowed from friends, then bought the box set a few months later.

Are you most looking forward to: Breaking Dawn, Midnight Sun, or the movie?

BD is already out, still waiting for MS to be finished, I already own the Twilight movie on DVD (and watched it countless times), so currently I'm waiting for New Moon to come out in theaters.

What's your dream ending to the series?

That Jacob was killed in a horrible bloody accident and Edward, Bella, and Nessie ran off into the sunset as a happy, loving, vampy family!!

Favorites:

Who is your favorite character?

Edward hands down.

Who's your favorite vampire?

Edward

Who is your favorite werewolf?

Seth

What's one of your favorite quotes from the stories?

And so the lion fell in love with the lamb. What a stupid lamb. What a sick, massochistic lion.

What was your favorite Bella and Edward moment?

Meadow scene, wedding, honeymoon (1st and 2nd), any mushy gushy lovey dovey moment between them. And, of course, WHEN EDWARD COMES BACK AND PROPOSES IN NEW MOON!!

What was your favorite Bella and Jacob moment?

When Bella punched Jacob in Eclipse and when Bella found out that Jacob imprinted on Renesmee in Breaking Dawn.

How about your favorite Bella and Alice moment?

At the end of Eclipse

What was your favorite adventure/battle?

When Alice and Bella run off to rescue Edward in Volterra

Which book cover was your favorite?

Breaking Dawn. Because of the symbloism. In the background there is a pawn- the weakest link of the game, which represents Bella at the beginning of the series, and in the front is a Queen, which is Bella at the end of the series because she conqures all in the end and helps the Cullens win the game.

Are these books among your favorite books of all?

Jasper and Rosalie Hale yes! lol

This or That?

Twilight or New Moon?

Twilight

New Moon or Eclipse?

Eclipse

Eclipse or Twilight?

Twilight

Are you more excited about Breaking Dawn or Midnight Sun?

Midnight Sun

Midnight Sun or the Twilight Movie?

Twilight movie. They're pretty much the same story, just different perspectives.

The Twilight Movie or Breaking Dawn?

Breaking Dawn

Who do you want to see Bella with most: Edward or Jacob?

Edward

Who do you like more:

Bella or Edward?

Edward

Bella or Jacob?

Bella

Bella or Alice?

Alice

Alice or Jacob?

Alice

Rosalie or Alice?

Alice

Jasper or Alice?

Alice

Jasper or Edward?

Edward

Carlisle or Esme?

Esme

Emmett or Jasper?

Jasper

Emmett or Jacob?

Emmett

Bella or Rosalie?

Bella

Esme or Charlie?

Esme

Charlie or Carlisle?

Carlisle

Charlie or Billy?

Charlie

Jacob or Sam?

Sam

Sam or Quil?

Quil

Quil or Embry?

Quil

Who's the better villain: James or Victoria?

Victoria. She didn't rush into it like James, she managed to live through almost three whole books, she's more stealthy and she's more contemplative and patient.

Werewolves or Vampires?

VAMPIRES!!

Movie Stuff:

How did you first find out about the movie?

I forget. Internet, I guess. I became more and more excited the more obsessed I became. lol

Are you excited?

Did you not read my response to the previous question? OF COURSE!!

What do you think of the casting so far?

awesome awesome awesome!!

Are you going to go see it?

Saw it the day after it came out, now i have it on dvd!!

Planning on going with anyone in particular?

I saw it with a friend who saw it the day before me.

Do you think it stayed true to the book?

Sort of

Breaking Dawn Speculation:

Are you planning on buying this book as soon as it's out?

I hadn't even heard of the series when it came out. I didn't know anything about Twilight till like September. Started reading it a month later.

Do you think Bella will be turned into a vampire finally?

I know she has

Do you think she and Edward will get married?

I know they have.

Do you think Jacob might imprint in this book?

Yes, he did. Good news: he imprinted on someone who isn't Bella! Bad news: but he just HAD to imprint on her freaking daughter!! Bella should've ripped his head off when she found out! Or Edward. Or someone at least!

Who do you think Bella will end up with : Edward or Jacob?

I KNOW she'll end up with Edward!

Do you think it will be a happy, sad, or shocking ending?

I thought it would be shocking and a cliffy- but it was somewhat happy. I was sad it ended too abruptly though.

Who do you think will be the villain(s) of the book this time?

Volturi. I know they are. I'd also count Jacob for parts of this book, like the beginning and middle. He was nice towards the end.

How would you feel about a possible vampire / werewolf cross?

impossibility. even though Nessire's only half vamp...

Will Charlie find out Edward is a vampire?

No, but he knows something's up.

Will the vampires and werewolves continue the truce they had in Eclipse?

No they make another truce on different grounds.

If anyone, who do you think will die in this book?

I was praying Jacob would die- but of course it didn't happen. = (

For a twist: what would you think if Edward was somehow turned human?

Awesome!!

Do you think Jacob will be over Bella by the end of the book?

My solution was his death

What do you most want to happen in Breaking Dawn?

JACOB TO BURN IN THE PITS OF HELL! Or he could simply "fall" off a cliff with millions of pointy rocks and deadly rapids at the bottom where he lands... and Edward just "happened" to be standing at the top of the cliff, watching him suffer! (What? It could happen...)

What's your dream ending?

For Jacob to die and for Edward and Bella to go on with their lives as if the dog never exsisted.

(A Few Last Things:)

In which book did you like Bella's character best?

Breaking Dawn- she was finally tired of just being fragile and human and always taking the easy way out- she kept the baby and suffered in silence, I bet you the Bella in Twilight would have never been able to have done that.

How about Edward's?

He didn't exactly seem to change much... well definitely not before New Moon, not in Twilight or New Moon he needed to realize he NEEDED Bella in his life. But in Breaking Dawn- after he saw Nessie as his daughter and not a thing, I like him best.

Jacob's?

Twilight. He was nothing more than a tool back then. And the beginning of New Moon before he ever phased. Those were the days... Beyond that, I still hate him.

Alice's?

When she comes back in New Moon and when she comes back in Breaking Dawn.

If it were possible...who would you most want to meet in person?

Edward so I can beg him not to leave in New Moon and tell him Bella will be changed into a vampire whether he likes it or not, then proceed to tell the entire plot of the series to him after making him swear he won't change anything else in the book. Or Alice so I can ask her repeatedly what happens in my future.

The below statement is true.
The above statement is false.

37 Things to do in an Elevator

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time."

Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Jesus had no servants, yet they called him Master...

He had no degree, yet they called him Teacher...

He had no medicine, yet they called him Healer...

He had no army, yet kings feared him...

He won no military battles, yet he conquered the world...

He committed no crime, yet they crucified Him...

He was buried in a tomb, yet He lives today

Feel honoured to serve such a leader who loves us...

If you believe in the tiune God, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost

then copy and paste this in your profile

If you ignore him, in the Holy Bible, Jesus says...

"If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my Father in Heaven..."

1. If practice makes perfect & nobody's perfect, why practice?

2. Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God...I could be eating a slow learner.

3. What would a chair look like, if your knees bent the other way?

4. Why do our noses run and our feet smell?

5. What does "it" mean in the sentence "What time is it?"?

6. If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

7. Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

8. When someone with multiple personalities threathens suicide, can that be considered a hostige situation?

9. What Happens If You Get Scared Half To Death Twice?

10. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?

11. Why do they call it "common sense" when it's so rare?

12. Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

13. If you get corn oil by squeezing corn, how do you get baby oil?

14. Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

15. If electricity comes from electrons does it mean morality comes from morons?

16. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too?

17. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

19. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

20. If God didn't want us to eat people, why did he make them out of MEAT?

21. Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

22. If Wal-Mart is lowering prices every day, how come nothing is free yet?

23. Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

24. Psychics never win the lottery. Why is that?

25. How can two space ships meeting always face the right way up in Sci-Fi movies?

26. You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

27. If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?

28. How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

29. Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

30. Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

31. Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

32. If you blame someone for your failures, do you credit them for your achievements?

33. If FedEx and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP?

34. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

35. How come everyone's going so slow if it's called rush hour?

36. Why is the person who invests all your money called a broker??

37. Why do we chop a tree "down" and then chop it "up"?

38. How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?

39. Why do we wash BATH TOWELS; aren't we clean when we use them?

40. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?

41. If money doesn't make us happy, then what does it do?

42. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?

43. If ours is a man made world, why can't we remake it?

44. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

45. When people say "I woke up on the wrong side of the bed," What side is the right side?

46. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?

47. Why do we put suits in a Garment Bag, and put Garments in a Suitcase?

48. Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get rid of?

49. When Puerto Rico joins the union, where will they put the 51st star?

50. Who were the beta testers for Preparations A through G?

Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.
Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."
When I hear somebody sigh "Life is hard" I'm always tempted to ask "Compared to what?"
We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America, but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of Illegal immigrants and Terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration!
"We could all take a lesson from crayons: some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, all are different colors, but they still learn to live in the same box."
When people don't laugh at our jokes we don't think of it as a "You had to be there." type of thing. But more like a "You have to be mentally retarded like us." type of thing
Having the love of your life say, "we can still be friends", is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.
Parents spend the first part of a child's life teaching them to walk and talk. The second half is teaching them to sit down and shut up
"The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide."
They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people
If you hate someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way you are a mile away from them AND you have their shoes.
Energizer Bunny was arrested, charged with battery
The only reason people get lost in thought is because it's unfamiliar territory.
He who laughs last didn't get it.
when a guy tells u “girl, you must be a thief because you just stole my heart” reply by kindly telling him I only steal valuable things”
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Don't follow in my footsteps, I tend to walk into walls

If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.

Olny fteefin prenect of poelpe can raed this. fI you are one fo taht prenect, cpoy and pstae tihs itno yuor porflie.

If you have your own little world, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever been called a bookworm and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

EMBRACE THE WEIRDNESS! If you embrace the weirdness, then copy and paste this on to your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this into your profile

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile :D

If you think that life without computers is useless, add this to your profile.

If you've ever done something "blonde", put this in your profile

SPPPLLLEEEEE! SPPPLLLLOOOOPPPP! ... if your extremely random, add this to your profile.

If your HyPeR, like being hYpEr, and are HyPeR all the time, add this to your profile. WHOOOO!!

For me, crazy is a very loose term. Maybe its when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks just what you find so interesting about the eraser. For others its when you have an hour long sob fest, then start singing and dancing just because you heard your favorite song. Maybe for you its when someone does or says something totally random like "do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or they start have a thumbwar with themself. If you fit this desrciption and your proud of it, add this to your profile.

If you ever threatened a computer or video e console, add this to your profile.

If you know you and all your friends are insane and don't care, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like copying and pasting these copy and paste things, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!

If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile

If you've laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, copy and paste this into your profile

If you spend multiple hours each day reading and/or writing copy and paste this into your profile

If you like the rain copy and paste this into your profile. (i like walking in the rain barefoot! whoo hoo!!)

If you like the designs on Kleenex boxes, copy and paste this into your profile

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two s feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot,

Who calls you back when you hang up on him,

Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead,

Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats,

Who holds your hand in public and in front of his friends and family.

Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he loves you and how lucky he is to have you.

If you think that describes Edward Cullen, copy it into your profile

Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you like me?

Boy: No

Girl: Do you want me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you cry if I left?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you live for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Would you do anything for me?

Boy: No

Girl: Choose--me or your life

Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle:

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she could live. If you would do this for a loved one copy and paste, please

Effective Ways On How To Annoy/Scare/Weird Out The Living Daylights Outta People (on elevators, in computer labs, etc.) (my faves are in italics)
1. Repeat everything the person says in a question.
2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World." incessantly.
3. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
4. Offer nametags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, and then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
7. Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
8. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
9. Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
10. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh no, not now, damn motion sickness!"
11. Meow occasionally. (Brian can do this and actually sound like a real cat... him and bolly started speaking cat back and forth and it was hysterical!)
12. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
13. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
14. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
15. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
16. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
17. Say "Ding!" at each floor.
18. Say, "I wonder what all these do." and push the red buttons.
19. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
20. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
22. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
23. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at other passengers.
24. Stop at every floor, run off the elevator, then run back on.
25. Ask every passenger that goes up if you can press the button for them.
26. Log on to a computer, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream: "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
27. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
28. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the dang thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
29. Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly.
30. Bring a chain saw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.
31. Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes.
32. If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.
33. Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, and then when it's all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.
34. Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
35. Send e-mails constantly to the person next to you.
36. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
37. Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
38. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
39. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
40. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
41. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
42. Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
43. Swat at flies that don't exist.
44. Dance, while drumming noisily against the walls.

You know you're obsessed with Twilight when:
You start going up to random people to tell them you want an Edward!
You think your next-door neighbor looks like a vampire, or he really is a vampire.
You try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them.
You've read Twilight, New Moon and Eclipse at least 5 times each!
You check on this site 5 times (or more) a day to see if there's any new Twilight news.
You think your best friend's crazy for not reading Twilight, New Moon, and/or Eclipse.
When you see a box labeled "Forks", you think there's something imported from Forks, Washington in there.
Twilight has ruined any and all future reading for you.
You use Twilight for every single school project that pops up.
You break up with your boyfriend because he doesn't glitter in the sun like Edward.
You have nothing to do, so you go to www.stepheniemeyer.com and read everything on the site twice. And then go to the Lexicon and do the same thing.
You promise your friend that if he can find you an Edward, you'll give him the answers to your homework for the rest of your school-life.
You plan on naming your children after characters in any of the books in the Twilight series.
You walk around school looking for pale-skinned, inhumanly beautiful classmates with red or gold eyes.
You see a shadow, think it's Edward, and start talking to it.

If you think Stephenie Meyer is one of the best writers in existence, copy this into your profile.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to
the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident ."

7. My mother taught me IRONY
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me CONTORTIONISM
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me WEATHER
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me: ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me: RECEIVING
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me: MEDICAL SCIENCE
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me: ESP
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me: HUMOR
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me: HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22.My Mother taught me: Genetics
"I swear you're just like your father."

23. My Mother taught me about my Roots
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24.My Mother taught me Wisdom
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about Justice
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you"

What a Boyfriend SHOULD do :

When she walks away from you mad, follow her
When she stares at your mouth, kiss her
When she pushes you or hits you, grab her and don't let go
When she starts cussing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet, ask her what's wrong
When she ignores you, give her your attention
When she pull's away, pull her back
When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying, just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared, protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steals your favorite hat, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she teases you, tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt, back yourself up
When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand
When she grabs at your hands, hold hers and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does
When she misses you, she's hurting inside
When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away
When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers
When she repost this bulletin, she wants you to read it
Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything
When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go
When she says she's ok, don't believe it, talk with her, because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her, call her before you sleep and after you wake up
Treat her like she's all that matters to you
Tease her and let her tease you back
Stay up all night with her when she's sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
Give her the world, let her wear your clothes
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her, let her know she's important
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Whose ass am I kicking babe?

These are Dr. Laura's man rules.

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
2. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
3. Sunday sports; it's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
6. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
7. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
8. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
9. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
10. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
11. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
12. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
13. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
14. ALL men see in only 16 Colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A Color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
15. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
16. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
17. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really .
18. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.
19. You have enough clothes.
20. You have too many shoes.
21. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
22. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be? Here's how it works:
1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc.)
2. Put it on shuffle.
3. Press play.
4. For every question, type the song that's playing.
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and pretend you're cool.
Scene-- Band/Artist-- Song title
1. Opening credits: Welcome- Jump5
2. Waking up: Here we go- Nsync
3. First day of college: All around me- Flyleaf
4. Falling in love: I belong to you- Muse
5. Kiss scene: More than useless- Relient K
6. Fight song: All-American Girl- Carrie Underwood
7. Breaking up: My heart will go on- Celine Dion
8. Graduating college: Hysteria- Muse
9. Big break: Taking over me- Evanescence
10. Mental breakdown: Dancing Queen- A-Teens
11. Driving song: I could not ask for more- Edwin McCain
12. Flashback: Tearin' up my heart- Nsync
13. Getting back together: Crushcrushcrush- Paramore
14. Wedding: My Immortal- Evanescence
15. Birth of child: Take a chance on me- A-Teens
16. Paying dues: Baby Mine- Alison Krauss
17. Moment of triumph: Never Think- Robert Pattison
18. Final battle: Be my escape- Relient K
19. Death: Decode- Paramore
20. Funeral scene: I don't wanna miss a thing- Aerosmith
21. End credit: That's what you get- Paramore

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Emmett's Guide to Survive High School by TheBoleynLegacy reviews
With these tips invented by Emmett you are guaranteed to survive the most agonizing, miserable and painful years of your life, otherwise known as high school. co-author:Pink Vampire Skittle
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 57 - Words: 20,355 - Reviews: 325 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 7/27/2013 - Published: 3/29/2008 - Emmett
What the Hale! by Mimidearr reviews
Jasper:"I'm Bored." Alice:"Me too." Jasper:"LETS DO SOMETHING RANDOM!" Alice:"YEAH! LIKE FUZZBUCKETS RANDOM!" : Alice and Jasper said it all. But if you didnt understand... This is random stuff the Cullens do in their free time... Fuzzbuckets random stuff
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 59 - Words: 24,733 - Reviews: 520 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 7/25/2013 - Published: 11/24/2008 - Complete
Random Oneshots by pearberry14 reviews
Random one-shots that pop into my head when I'm bored. Lots of randomness ensues!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 20 - Words: 7,143 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 12/30/2012 - Published: 11/21/2008 - Jacob, Paul
How To Annoy The Cullen's by JustBella reviews
Each chapter gives you ten funny ways to annoy a Cullen.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 210 - Reviews: 316 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 2/5/2012 - Published: 3/11/2009
It All Started With Ed VS Chuck! by CaliKitty13 reviews
This is what you get when you take two crazy fangirls at 3 A.M. give them loads of Red Bull and a computer. Hopefully better than sounds.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,255 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/21/2012 - Published: 5/8/2009 - Alice, Bella
Power of the imagination by Matilda-333 reviews
being a seven year old orphan is hard enough, for lissa all she wants is to escape. falling into the twilight books she seeks her chance at a new life. little dose she know that the story line has changed. things arn't as safe anymore. plz read & reveiw
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 56 - Words: 111,701 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 11/20/2011 - Published: 1/24/2010
Going Home by MainlyMaddison reviews
Paul has imprinted, and Jacob doesn't approve. Rachel comes home from college and finds much more than she expected. Paul/Rachel
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 31 - Words: 76,451 - Reviews: 953 - Favs: 385 - Follows: 391 - Updated: 9/19/2011 - Published: 8/7/2008 - Paul, Rachel
The Wall by MissThespian reviews
Edward and Bella live on two different sides of The Wall that seperates men and woman, created by the Volturi. Bella dreams of making it the other side, Edward wishes to merely to survive. Love is nonexistent. And illegal.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 24 - Words: 116,705 - Reviews: 831 - Favs: 501 - Follows: 263 - Updated: 2/13/2011 - Published: 4/1/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
What Happens in Vegas by BlushingBlondie reviews
It's beautiful." I whispered, as I lifted my hand to look at the diamond ring closer. Then, reality set in. "We're MARRIED?" ExB!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 23,408 - Reviews: 531 - Favs: 325 - Follows: 320 - Updated: 12/3/2010 - Published: 3/30/2009 - Bella, Edward
Restless Heart by IsabellClair reviews
Sequal to Forever Young. Renesmee's POV! Our little Renesmee is growing up, but it's not going to be a smooth road to adulthood.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 92 - Words: 200,008 - Reviews: 2728 - Favs: 522 - Follows: 269 - Updated: 9/8/2010 - Published: 8/17/2009 - Complete
I Know Who Killed Me by megagenie reviews
Leah's thought before and after Sam's disappearance, imprinting on Emily and on Leah and Seth phasing for the first time. Her suffering leading her to become bitter and showing hatred against Sam and Emily for betraying and breaking her apart.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 8 - Words: 32,093 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 8/30/2010 - Published: 12/28/2009 - Leah
Cross My Heart and Hope To Die by hopesallthings reviews
It always was hard to keep things from Alice. So naturally, he had secrets that only she knew.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 26 - Words: 14,160 - Reviews: 266 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 7/14/2010 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Nights with Edward by hermione29 reviews
A story filled with lust, love, passion, and fluff. Everything you wished Stephanie Meyer had put in the books. Completely in character. Love scenes with Edward and Bella! First story, please read and review!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 36,835 - Reviews: 744 - Favs: 359 - Follows: 283 - Updated: 7/12/2010 - Published: 10/25/2008 - Edward, Bella
The Twilight Saga: Esme's POV by dogsrplayful reviews
This is the Twilight Saga and slightly before and slightly after in Esme's POV. As with my other Twilight stories, Life after Breaking Dawn and A Perfect Couple, please leave a review so I can improve the story. Enjoy! - Temporarily on hiatus -
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 26 - Words: 20,441 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 6/28/2010 - Published: 6/26/2009 - Esme, Carlisle
Because I Love You by Daughter of Romanov reviews
Rosalie always needed to be busy. Emmett was contented with the Forks' life. So when there was nothing to do, Rosalie decided to leave for something. Will Emmett convice her to stay? All vampires, before Twilight.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,985 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/9/2010 - Published: 7/4/2009 - Rosalie, Emmett - Complete
Unspoken Conversations by Terez reviews
Alice and Jasper have conversations without speaking.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 8,889 - Reviews: 205 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 46 - Updated: 3/2/2010 - Published: 5/8/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Marry Me by Terez reviews
Jasper proposes to Alice.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,140 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/26/2010 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
I'm Alive by X-Jazzlife-X reviews
Alice takes Jasper to a little spot they can enjoy alone together. Their conversation is full of fluffy stuff about kids, music and polar bears.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,116 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 6 - Published: 1/5/2010 - Jasper, Alice - Complete
Fluffy Stuff by xxbloodyxlacexx reviews
Random fluffy stories every character ooc
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 600 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/22/2009 - Alice, Jasper
A Different Kind of Monster by aggiecullen10 reviews
Alice notices that Bella is exhausted while they are studying for finals and Alice has just the thing to help her out- a Monster energy drink. Alice then discovers a whole new side to her best friend that she has never seen before, and its hilarious!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,641 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 12/18/2009 - Published: 5/8/2009 - Alice, Bella
Twenty Bucks In Twenty Seconds by FuzzyWuzzyWithBadHaircut reviews
The characters of Twilight are put to the test as they try to win 20 dollars by answering as many questions as possible in 20 seconds. Dont you want to know about Alices favourite brands, Bellas wiggles fixation, or who EDWARD would turn gay for?-COMPLETE
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 34,385 - Reviews: 979 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 109 - Updated: 12/13/2009 - Published: 12/14/2008 - Complete
Bella and Emmett's Songs by Completely Dipendente reviews
Bella is drunk and her and Emmett are writing songs about some of the people they know. Please review, even if you hate it x
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 10,151 - Reviews: 712 - Favs: 291 - Follows: 150 - Updated: 11/28/2009 - Published: 1/23/2009 - Bella, Emmett
Ill by Oasis Shy reviews
One shot. Alice has always been in love with her best friend. When she falls ill and doesn't tell him and just leaves what will happen when he finds out that she is dying. JxA and mentioned EmxR and BxE
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,693 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11/22/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
What Emmet Gets Back by NonsenseScribbler reviews
This is the sequel to My Puppy the link is inside ; Emmett turns into a girl and Him I mean HER and the Cullens plus Bella do some crazy stuff.Between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 11 - Words: 9,839 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 11/13/2009 - Published: 8/3/2009 - Emmett
Abuse by MissThespian reviews
Edward never came back in New Moon,Bella married Jacob and had a daughter.He is abusive. What happens when Edward comes back and discovers their daughter? How will her existence affect the relationship between her and the Cullens?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 69,791 - Reviews: 1247 - Favs: 451 - Follows: 200 - Updated: 11/2/2009 - Published: 1/8/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Ink by Terez reviews
Alice shows Jasper what he means to her with a calligraphy pen and a bottle of ink.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,250 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 10/31/2009 - Published: 7/21/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Oh My Leah, Gone by iamwallflowerxx reviews
Just a thing written by Seth about Leah after Sam left her. R&R.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 471 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/28/2009 - Seth, Leah - Complete
Sunset by BarnumOnTheBrain reviews
The love story of Bella and Edward is now a famous one. But what happened on the other side? What happened to his family during this stressed out time? Twilight from Esme's POV, her and Carlisle's romance is a main part of the story.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 15 - Words: 20,776 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 9/28/2009 - Published: 8/30/2009 - Esme, Carlisle
If Bella hadn't jumped by Blueberry-Pie2 reviews
Set right before Bella jumps off the cliff. Alternate ending to New Moon. What if Edward came back?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 23 - Words: 72,826 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 9/27/2009 - Published: 5/13/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Things each of the Cullen kids can't do by Master Spy advenger reviews
Carlisle is done with his kids behavior, so he makes lists of things they have done and can't do any more. Rated T.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 7,346 - Reviews: 144 - Favs: 76 - Follows: 45 - Updated: 9/3/2009 - Published: 12/27/2008
What Happens in Detention by WereWolf1010 reviews
Six kids from totally different cliques wound up being together in detention. Can you just sense the drama? ExB JxA EmxR. All human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 45,159 - Reviews: 222 - Favs: 163 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 8/29/2009 - Published: 2/17/2009
Broken by Moluvsnumber17 reviews
After the death of Harry Clearwater, Sam pays a visit to Seth and Leah.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,207 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/25/2009 - Leah, Sam - Complete
Forever Young by IsabellClair reviews
This takes place right after Breaking Dawn. I'm trying to stay as close to the books as I can, but throwing in some of my own twists. Please read and review! I will keep writing as long as you keep reading!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 57 - Words: 106,603 - Reviews: 894 - Favs: 658 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 8/17/2009 - Published: 6/5/2009 - Complete
My Puppy by NonsenseScribbler reviews
Summary: Emmet gave Edward some fluid that turned him into a dog. The question: Why did Edward drink something that Emmet gave him? Bella finds out and has to live with puppy Edward until Carlisle finds an antidote....Eclipse - Breaking Dawn
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 10,964 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 8/3/2009 - Published: 5/11/2009 - Bella, Edward
Vampire Imprint by Love.Laur reviews
We all know that werewolves imprint and find their soul mates, but none of us knew that, although rare, vampires can imprint too. But their imprinting is different. They imprint with motherly or fatherly love. Please read and review! First fic.BellaEdward
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,021 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 8/2/2009 - Published: 6/18/2008 - Edward, Bella
Imprint by iamwallflowerxx reviews
What if Sam never imprinted on Emily? What if Leah never became a wolf?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 50 - Words: 41,518 - Reviews: 200 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 7/26/2009 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Leah, Sam - Complete
Bloody Tears by Obsessed.with.writing reviews
Edward and Bella were always good friends. Edward moves away when they are 12. 5 years later he comes back to a completely different Bella. Why does she wear that oversized hoodie? Why does she get called Emo-girl? ABUSE WARNING. All Human.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Tragedy - Chapters: 24 - Words: 26,637 - Reviews: 1106 - Favs: 723 - Follows: 531 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 6/9/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Great Sparkly Book of Lols by Iskeirka reviews
Armed with the keyboard at my fingertips and my hatred of all thing Twilight, I endevour to tear Twilight to shreds in your eyes, and if I can crack you up laughing in the process, all the better. This is what would happen if I was Bella Swan.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 22,817 - Reviews: 202 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 6/20/2009 - Published: 2/7/2009
Love Me by Emiliana Keladry reviews
Bella is sick and finds out she has cancer. Edward has to make a decision before it's too late. Nominated for Best Romance on La Tua Cantante awards.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 22 - Words: 49,799 - Reviews: 1177 - Favs: 919 - Follows: 363 - Updated: 5/26/2009 - Published: 7/7/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Reading Between the Lines by Brynna reviews
A collection of Alice/Jasper one-shots.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 38 - Words: 64,783 - Reviews: 2001 - Favs: 785 - Follows: 453 - Updated: 5/25/2009 - Published: 11/19/2008 - Alice, Jasper
Kindle My Heart by sprinkledwithpearls reviews
."I sat here, tucked away in my little asylum, tucked away from the world. It didn't matter if I was alive or dead. Nothing mattered now." Before she was Alice Cullen, she was Mary Alice Brandon. The tragic past of our favorite vampire.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 45,137 - Reviews: 334 - Favs: 72 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 5/22/2009 - Published: 4/13/2009 - Alice - Complete
Two Creepers And A Human by NikkiB123 reviews
Bella and Edward come home to find Jasper is really hyper because he mixed sugar with blood while hunting. Edward leaves because he is scared of Jasper, Alice/Rose are shopping, Carlisle/Esme are hunting. Bellais stuck with Jasper/Emmett! Bad Summary!OOC
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 5,406 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 5/11/2009 - Published: 11/28/2008
Soprano and Bass by ClairedeLuneTaz reviews
THe untold Love story of Jasper and Alice. Jasper's POV.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 38,467 - Reviews: 797 - Favs: 276 - Follows: 200 - Updated: 4/26/2009 - Published: 1/5/2009 - Alice, Jasper
a unicorned twilight by 7andthefluff reviews
charlie the unicorn and twilight cast
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,950 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 7 - Published: 4/26/2009 - Jacob, Edward
Beautiful by Terez reviews
Alice comes home from school upset, Jasper wants to know why and make her feel better.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,178 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 68 - Follows: 9 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
MotherDaughter Moment by Bibliophile224 reviews
After Breaking Dawn - Esme and Bella have a moment while watching Nessie sleep. Please Read and Review!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 534 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/11/2009 - Bella, Esme - Complete
Crescent by XoChelseaAmberXo reviews
I nestled myself in the crevices of his body, mine forming into his. I looked up into his gorgeous topaz eyes and kissed him gently. He smiled and kissed me back as we laid there, listening to the rain beat against the roof and windows.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 21 - Words: 52,770 - Reviews: 409 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 146 - Updated: 4/9/2009 - Published: 10/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
How Do I live without you? by AllTimeLow23 reviews
What would have happened if Victoria had gotten past the wolves and to Bella on the same night that Alice showed up at her house? Will they be okay? Or will an angel fall? One-shot
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,935 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/8/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
The Rarest Thing by musicsetsmefree1 reviews
From the beginning, it was her. To the end, it will always be her. No matter what happens in-between. A Sam/Emily love story.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 17 - Words: 53,241 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 4/6/2009 - Published: 7/9/2008 - Sam, Emily - Complete
50 Things I Want to Do to Mike Newton by luv2read134 reviews
Also called "Marvelously Mischievous Methods to Make Mike Miserable". Bella is having a bad day, and when Mike asks her out for the millionth time, she's had it. She writes a list of 50 things she'd like to do to hurt or humiliate Mike. Canon. R&R.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,880 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 4/5/2009 - Published: 3/5/2009
Veggie Vamps and other Cullen Song Fics by michaeladawn reviews
Basically random little skits about the Cullens, usually involving them singing Veggie Tales songs with word alterations or other songs. Just random and funny I think so anyway
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 5,112 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/24/2009 - Published: 8/8/2008 - Emmett, Jasper
All My Loving by MainlyMaddison reviews
Maybe Kim isn't as shy as everyone thinks. This is my version of how Kim and Jared got together and how their relationship grows through time. Kim/Jared!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 23 - Words: 48,232 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 208 - Follows: 119 - Updated: 3/20/2009 - Published: 6/12/2008 - Jared, Kim - Complete
JACOBS DEATH! by 1 Twilighter reviews
Jacob dieing in MANY diffrent ways! : If you like Jacob i advise you to NOT read this you may be emotionally scared.... Well we think there good stories.....
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 728 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/19/2009
Truth or Dare CULLEN STYLE by GeeGeeCullen16 reviews
The Younger Cullens play Truth or Dare while Esme and Carlisle are out : R&R!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,000 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 3/15/2009 - Published: 3/11/2009 - Complete
Bad Fanfiction by yayme2012 reviews
Funny fanfic telling what you SHOULDN'T do in Twilight fanfiction... Includes JacobXBella, EmmettXBella, and my personal fave: BananasXBella! New chapters include The Movie, Yum Lemons, and 2008. Curing Twilight fanfiction, one parody at a time.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 66 - Words: 51,675 - Reviews: 2792 - Favs: 571 - Follows: 331 - Updated: 3/2/2009 - Published: 11/14/2007 - Elizabeth, Aro
Roses by Terez reviews
Jasper has a gift for Alice.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 696 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 5 - Published: 2/21/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
Love Letter from Esme by kimmer2 reviews
Winner of the Twilight Lexicon Love Letter Contest; Esme-Carlisle category; Esme writes a Valentine's letter to Carlisle
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 267 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/14/2009 - Complete
I Love You Beyond Words by i'mxaxreader reviews
Eight notes. One message. From Edward to Bella. Oneshot. Read and review.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,111 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/16/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Twilight Crackfic by ohhsnapex3 reviews
What do you get when you cross a Twilighter with too much sugar? This story. x Umm.. super OOC because it's a crackfic.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 728 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/15/2009
Sunset Rosalie's side of Twilight by Floretta reviews
The events of Twilight through the eyes of Rosalie Hale.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 10,765 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 1/9/2009 - Published: 12/15/2008 - Rosalie
The Twilight Movie Experience! by LatinaPunkita reviews
Haven't seen the movie yet and have no idea what to expect? Look no more! This story will sum up the classic experience of the Motion Picture Twilight! Just beware of the Team Edward and Team Jacob fan cat fights...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,749 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 1/4/2009 - Published: 1/2/2009
25 things to do at WalMart: Cullen Style by star-girl62626 reviews
Written for vampireSPEED and twilight-is-lovee's Vampires go to WalMart! Contest. Original idea. Read and review! Oneshot. Humor.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,278 - Reviews: 114 - Favs: 147 - Follows: 19 - Published: 1/4/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Come What May by twilightbystarlight reviews
Bella is deeply in love with Edward, a rich lawyer's son, but with the spanish influenza approaching, will the lovers get their happy ending? Takes place in 1918, and is all human except for Carlisle
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 28 - Words: 59,539 - Reviews: 373 - Favs: 313 - Follows: 134 - Updated: 1/1/2009 - Published: 11/3/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
An Eternity of Kisses by KrAzI JaY reviews
Edward takes Bella’s bet of not being able to kiss her for a full day seriously, can Bella last a full day? Can Edward? Oneshot Edward/Bella
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,340 - Reviews: 72 - Favs: 111 - Follows: 13 - Published: 12/9/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
25 Ways to Annoy Jacob Chellie Edition by Munchie217 reviews
Contains spoilers for Breaking Dawn. Some good ways to piss Jacob off, have a good laugh, then probably die. Review please...they make me feel like this was worth my time.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 277 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/7/2008 - Jacob - Complete
Team Edward Vs Team Jacob One Shot by OHsoCONFUSED reviews
My name is Amanda *grins* and I am team Edward! My name is Stephanie and I am team Jacob! So this a one shot story. About two girls trying to convince one another to cross over to there team. But neither is caving. Who will give up?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 629 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 3 - Published: 11/30/2008 - Complete
My Daughter on My Toes by Nollie Marie reviews
Part of "Additional Breaking Dawn Moment" collection: Edward and Bella find Renesmee listening to Bella's mixed CD from Bella's 18th birthday which leads to Edward dancing with Renesmee...with her on his toes. It's a SHORT ONE SHOT!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,023 - Reviews: 70 - Favs: 141 - Follows: 21 - Published: 11/11/2008 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Edward - Complete
The Trick is to Keep Breathing by greenlemons reviews
Rosalie finds Emmett when his life is on the line, all because of a bear. When she makes the decision to save his life, she doesn't realize that she chose the path that will lead her life intertwined with the man she saved. This is their story.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 92,391 - Reviews: 311 - Favs: 256 - Follows: 103 - Updated: 11/7/2008 - Published: 5/9/2008 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
You Know You're Obsessed With Twilight When by Number-1- Twilighters reviews
You know you are! This is the list of things that us "Twilighters" do because of our obsession. Use it as your Twilight checklist. 1,000 reasons!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 40 - Words: 23,069 - Reviews: 792 - Favs: 198 - Follows: 111 - Updated: 11/5/2008 - Published: 9/5/2008 - Complete
Ten Reasons Why I Hate Jacob Black by sugarhigh123 reviews
These are 10 reasons why I hate Jacob. Probably not for Jacob lovers, unless you want your flames to be used to help burn Jacob in hell. Definitely for Edward lovers, though. Funny and creative, I hope. Die Jacob, die!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 310 - Reviews: 227 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 9 - Published: 10/12/2008 - Complete
Moments Together by Propapanda Ganda reviews
Drabbles of what Esme and Carlisle does throughout the day when the rest of the Cullens are gone hunting. Fluff.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,831 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 10/7/2008 - Published: 9/10/2008 - Carlisle, Esme
Daddy and Me by Nollie Marie reviews
Part of the "Additional Breaking Dawn Moments" collection: It's a one shot about a tender Daddy and me moment. It's from Renesmee's POV and it takes place AFTER Breaking Dawn
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,723 - Reviews: 101 - Favs: 199 - Follows: 26 - Published: 9/14/2008 - Renesmee C./Nessie, Edward - Complete
My Aunts and Uncles by Nollie Marie reviews
Part of the "Additional Breaking Dawn Moments" collection: Renesmee hanging out with her aunts & uncles: Rosalie is brushing her hair, Alice is being Alice, & Emmett decides to take her out on a hunt w/ Jasper tagging long to show her a few tricks. 1 shot
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,852 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 8 - Published: 9/9/2008 - Complete
Only You by artemisgoddess16 reviews
Carlisle/Esme. The story of Esme and Carlisle's beginning pure fluff COMPLETE
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,730 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 11 - Published: 9/7/2008 - Carlisle, Esme - Complete
Green! by Scarlett Redd reviews
Seth/Leah...toddler style. Just a pre-Twilight oneshot. Haha, I couldn't really help it, it seemed too adorable in my head... Oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Family/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,344 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/19/2008 - Leah, Seth - Complete
Oh My God by Piefizle73 reviews
Just a bunch of funny one-shots! Alice is an overly hyper cat? wtf?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 485 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/30/2008
Moonlit Skies by Cookie Crunch reviews
Eclipse written from Emmett's point of view.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 14,453 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 7/29/2008 - Published: 6/15/2008 - Emmett
Goodbye forever my love by Golden Vampire Eyes reviews
Bella dies in a car accident. This is her funeral. Edward's Point of view.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Parody/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,227 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 22 - Published: 6/29/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Twilight Trivia! by i.luv.vamps reviews
Response to DaniCullen's Challenge, The twilight trivia Gameshow! A gay Jacob, Cat food, and lot's and lot's of fangirls! What could possibly go wrong? This is Twilight Trivia! rated T for language. I've decided to leave this as a one shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,337 - Reviews: 32 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 6/23/2008 - Published: 5/24/2008 - Complete
Family Therapy Cullen Style by vjgm reviews
Carlisle has had it with the children's constant bickering so he sends the Cullen's to family therapy. Suicidal Edward,Bella's fear of committment, Alice addicted to shopping, Rosalie's hostility, Emmett and Japer's gambling..who will survive? FUNNY
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 18 - Words: 69,221 - Reviews: 8367 - Favs: 7,485 - Follows: 1,717 - Updated: 5/15/2008 - Published: 11/10/2007 - Complete
The Meadow by Gaara-chama2604 reviews
One-shot between Bella, Jacob, and Edward. When grudges lead to violence, someone has to die. Rated T just in case someone objects.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 328 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Published: 5/14/2008 - Complete
Face by Cullenocd reviews
Ah ha ha. This is definitely for Jacob-haters. Jacob.....dies? We can dream, cant we?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,353 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/19/2008 - Complete
Mary Alice by WishMyBloodSang reviews
She has always had what has been called a 'devil's curse' laid upon her. Her name is Mary Alice Brandon, she is 17 years old in present day Fork's Washington, she is friends with Bella Swan, but then the Cullen's move in and her abusive father flips. AU
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 28,723 - Reviews: 350 - Favs: 92 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 1/1/2008 - Published: 11/3/2007 - Complete
Shock Therapy by SinisterSweet07 reviews
Three obsessed girls get sent to a therapist about their Twilight obsessions. Imagine all the things that could happen. LMFAO. JxT aka Jane x Twilight
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,565 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 5/15/2007 - Published: 5/11/2007
Simple Explaination by JMisLB reviews
They've never needed words. Cute oneshot. Jasper&Alice. Fluff. Set post New Moon. Rated T.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 334 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/20/2006 - Complete
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Twilight karaoke reviews
Twilight characters sing random songs throughout their life.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 11,335 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 6/22/2010 - Published: 4/5/2009
Hope
A song-fic about Alice and Jasper
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 111 - Published: 6/21/2010 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
The angel and the teddy bear
A song-fic about Emmett and Rosalie
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 128 - Published: 6/21/2010 - Emmett, Rosalie - Complete
Three things reviews
Bella has only a few minutes to live, so she asks Edward to do three things for her. All human.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 224 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/4/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Romeo and Juliet reviews
If Edward couldn't live without me, why should I have to live without him? He'd want me to be happy, and as long as he was gone, I would be miserable. How could I go on without him? I couldn't. So something had to be done.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 14 - Words: 6,395 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 7/3/2009 - Published: 5/7/2009 - Bella - Complete
Complete reviews
Alice/Jasper fluff. Alice has a vision as she waits for Jasper to return from his hunting trip.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 493 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/23/2009 - Alice, Jasper - Complete
The lion and the lamb reviews
An Edward/Bella songfic, based off of the meadow scene in Twilight.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Romance/Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 300 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/19/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Me and the Cullens reviews
Just a totally random story I made up in an email one time. Hope you like it!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,677 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 5/8/2009
Emmett's pet reviews
Emmett wants a pet, but when Edward and Rosalie say no, how will Alice help? Edward laughs hysterically, Rose threatens Alice, and enter the mules.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 349 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/11/2009 - Emmett
The Mysterious Voice reviews
Edward hears a voice, but not one he recognizes. Strange thing is, everyone else starts so hear it, too. Sounds familiar, considering it's quotes from the books! hehe. Set between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 423 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/9/2009 - Edward