AbsurdEnthusiac
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Joined 03-07-09, id: 1859370
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My Wounded Soldier by counselor reviews
1866 Edward just home from the war. Neighbor Bella has a tragedy and Edward delivers her baby. Seeing as she's widowed, marriage makes sense. He doesn't feel worthy, but he can't step aside for her suitors. Competition amongst veterans.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,750 - Reviews: 5464 - Favs: 1,942 - Follows: 1,357 - Updated: 3/19 - Published: 3/5/2012 - Bella, Edward - Complete
My Ex-con by counselor reviews
Edward is fresh out of the big house and Bella is his new boss.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,086 - Reviews: 10314 - Favs: 1,520 - Follows: 1,551 - Updated: 3/19 - Published: 2/8/2014 - Bella, Edward - Complete
GYNAZOLE by Mrs.TheKing reviews
Bella has to fill an embarrassing prescription. Mr. Cullen is the pharmacist there to greet her. Rated M for every reason my twisted mind can come up with. ExB God help us if there is a lemon.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,442 - Reviews: 10381 - Favs: 2,820 - Follows: 2,379 - Updated: 2/27 - Published: 1/20/2010 - Bella, Edward
The Diva Diaries by KiyaRaven reviews
*TAKEN DOWN. MANY APOLOGIES.* Dear Diary, When he left, I became numb. Safe in a bubble of denial and bitterness. Now, he's back, and I've agreed to be his co-star in a new Broadway play. Obviously, if there were a Nation of Stupid People, I would be their Queen. A/H
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 11 - Words: 26,477 - Reviews: 12855 - Favs: 5,973 - Follows: 5,357 - Updated: 2/19 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Metaphysics by anais mark reviews
Edward & Bella are graduate students in London 'coincidentally' researching the same poets. More than 300 years after the fact, Carlisle & Edward must find out why Carlisle's past won't stay there - before Bella digs it up researching her thesis.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 36 - Words: 216,667 - Reviews: 2129 - Favs: 1,503 - Follows: 1,470 - Updated: 1/4 - Published: 2/8/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Last Tango in Forks by AwesomeSauce76 reviews
(PULLED TO PUBLISH) Bella Swan has spent a lifetime putting everyone else's needs before her own. Could a chance encounter with a mysterious stranger begin to change all of that? AU/AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 492 - Reviews: 16906 - Favs: 8,631 - Follows: 5,708 - Updated: 9/7/2014 - Published: 4/23/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Plan - OUTTAKES by QuantumFizzx reviews
REMOVED. Thank you for your readership. Kept a few chapters up to explain why & share outtakes alter. Obsessed but unnoticed for over a year, she puts a plan in motion to catch the eye of the corner-office. That's her plan. Fate has another plan entirely
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,687 - Reviews: 19574 - Favs: 6,532 - Follows: 4,468 - Updated: 3/9/2014 - Published: 12/12/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Starry Eyed Inside by Rochelle Allison reviews
High School Fictional. No one sends Bella into a tailspin quite like Edward Cullen... but can she make him hers? The ups and downs and all arounds.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 148,408 - Reviews: 8928 - Favs: 5,691 - Follows: 3,431 - Updated: 12/1/2013 - Published: 8/24/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Inappropriate Touching by jenjiveg reviews
While OCD Edward works on his mental health issues, he meets a girl…who has problems of her own…not the least of which is chronic clumsiness. OOC, AH, BxE. Rated M for lemons and language.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 98,606 - Reviews: 295 - Favs: 221 - Follows: 305 - Updated: 7/19/2013 - Published: 6/28/2013
String Theory by theladyingrey42 reviews
"Eleven dimensions. Infinite parallel realities. And in all of them, I love her." Muppets, math, and physicists falling in love. Fluff and eventual lemons. ExB, AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 54 - Words: 79,552 - Reviews: 8504 - Favs: 3,420 - Follows: 2,116 - Updated: 3/13/2013 - Published: 11/27/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Best I Ever Had by WhatsMyNomDePlume reviews
Sex between friends complicates everything. Bella knows this. But she has no idea how much more Edward is going to complicate things.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 14 - Words: 64,919 - Reviews: 7361 - Favs: 10,141 - Follows: 5,731 - Updated: 6/25/2012 - Published: 2/17/2011 - Edward, Bella - Complete
The Woods are Lovely, Dark, and Deep by bananapancakes7 reviews
Bella visits a quiet lodge in Forks and she meets the secretive, tormented Edward Masen. Just as their relationship transcends friendship, Edward's past comes back to haunt him in the most brutal way. B&E are human, but oh…there will be vampires. AU.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 38 - Words: 289,657 - Reviews: 5393 - Favs: 3,640 - Follows: 3,373 - Updated: 5/21/2012 - Published: 4/15/2009 - Bella, Edward
She Gives Me Religion by Liz Lemon Bennett reviews
A foul-mouth seminarian meets a just widowed bride in the brink of despair. A late in life coming of age story, Bella and Edward learn to have faith in themselves and each other. Started as a Cherry Exchange o/s, now full length.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 40 - Words: 269,539 - Reviews: 4357 - Favs: 1,905 - Follows: 2,005 - Updated: 3/25/2012 - Published: 11/29/2010 - Edward, Bella
Of Kith and Kin by Chicklette reviews
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love, and be loved in return." -Nat King Cole. This story is about that. AH, Canon pairings.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 88,113 - Reviews: 3865 - Favs: 3,441 - Follows: 1,914 - Updated: 12/19/2011 - Published: 7/16/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Solstice by cosmogirl7481 reviews
Life changes...just like the seasons. Bella finds herself coming out of an ending and into a beginning. Still hurt and emotionally withdrawn. Can someone new help her embrace the change in her life? Can her broken heart find love again? E/B Rated M.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 31 - Words: 38,902 - Reviews: 4673 - Favs: 1,182 - Follows: 902 - Updated: 11/2/2011 - Published: 9/7/2011 - Bella, Edward - Complete
A Rough Start by ItzMegan73 reviews
Overnight irresponsible Edward goes from bachelor to father of a 5 yr old. Meanwhile responsible, prepared Bella begins her first job as Kindergarten teacher at Forks Elementary. When irresponsible meets the epitome of responsible, sparks will fly!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 41 - Words: 253,554 - Reviews: 22891 - Favs: 14,135 - Follows: 10,628 - Updated: 8/31/2011 - Published: 8/20/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Art Teacher by spanglemaker9 reviews
He gave me art and words and passion and life, but all I wanted was him.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 97,635 - Reviews: 7133 - Favs: 5,166 - Follows: 3,292 - Updated: 8/1/2011 - Published: 11/7/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Cannabean Betrothal by ItzMegan73 reviews
Edward has immersed himself in the Cannabean way to ward off the hurt of a life-changing experience; but an unexpected betrothal teaches him how little he knows about life. There is no abuse in this story.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 38 - Words: 231,548 - Reviews: 14397 - Favs: 7,345 - Follows: 5,297 - Updated: 4/23/2011 - Published: 9/5/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Paper CutOuts by twistedcoincidence reviews
Bella prefers the virtual to the actual, but feels herself being tugged from the safety of her online realm into the world of a rough edged Edward. This time she'll write her own story. Collab with astilbe13 AH/AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 34 - Words: 136,587 - Reviews: 10169 - Favs: 6,136 - Follows: 3,638 - Updated: 2/15/2011 - Published: 5/23/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
BRONZE by mothlights reviews
Edward is a rebellious newborn lashing out at those who try to help him. At his wit's end, Carlisle asks Isabella, the woman who was once his mentor, to take Edward in until his bloodlust cools. ExB Very AU - COMPLETE
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 72,739 - Reviews: 1639 - Favs: 1,981 - Follows: 862 - Updated: 1/11/2011 - Published: 10/11/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Wedding Party by spanglemaker9 reviews
The perfect person appears at the worst possible moment, and one unforgettable encounter changes everything. AH
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 33 - Words: 192,619 - Reviews: 9332 - Favs: 6,359 - Follows: 3,676 - Updated: 11/3/2010 - Published: 4/1/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Blessing and the Curse by The Black Arrow reviews
By pretending she is falling for Edward, Bella is fulfilling Esme's dying wish. But sexy, possessive Edward can read her mind. Will she ever get into his? Can Bella forget the pain of her teenage years, and can she resist his relentless seduction? AH.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 140,448 - Reviews: 14198 - Favs: 15,135 - Follows: 8,253 - Updated: 9/10/2010 - Published: 5/31/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
For the Summer by camoozle reviews
Every year Bella waits for the 'Pay Checks' to roll into her sleepy river town and every year Edward's hers, just for the summer. AH, AU, OOC, B/E
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 176,780 - Reviews: 8837 - Favs: 7,446 - Follows: 3,876 - Updated: 8/19/2010 - Published: 4/30/2010 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Seducing Ms Swan by DQRC reviews
AU Post-NM. Teacher!Bella, Student!Edward; a struggle of wills, an attempt at seduction, a dark secret, a dash of UST, a gallon of attitude, antagonistic motorcycling, a hell of a lot of angst and one unforgettable scene in a snow storm.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 22 - Words: 132,610 - Reviews: 5843 - Favs: 6,112 - Follows: 4,830 - Updated: 7/12/2010 - Published: 7/26/2008 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Summer of Salt by lola-pops reviews
The heat wave lingers. Sweet, savory and slick. Jasper, Rose and I wade through the humid days, content in our relative isolation. We spend June through August at our family lake property, and this summer is like any other. Until it's not.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 26 - Words: 88,646 - Reviews: 4476 - Favs: 5,496 - Follows: 2,031 - Updated: 7/5/2010 - Published: 12/18/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Age of Consent by littlesecret84 reviews
Bella's summer internship turns interesting when Charlie arranges for Edward to drive her to and from the courthouse. As they talk and get to know each other, the sexual attraction Bella feels from the beginning evolves into something more.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 12 - Words: 31,044 - Reviews: 7016 - Favs: 4,161 - Follows: 2,333 - Updated: 12/4/2009 - Published: 6/6/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Inspiration by Isabel0329 reviews
When writer’s block gets in the way of Bella Swan’s second book, serendipity and misunderstandings bring her inspiration in a place she never thought she’d find it. Edward/Bella. All-human.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 10 - Words: 47,096 - Reviews: 680 - Favs: 347 - Follows: 573 - Updated: 9/16/2009 - Published: 4/25/2009 - Bella, Edward
The Anti Pleasure Dissertation by colacherry reviews
She's a feminist, he's a realist. Watch them grow and develop as they learn and challenge each other through differing ideas about sexuality and life in general. AH ADULT THEMES, LEMONS
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 46,578 - Reviews: 1029 - Favs: 742 - Follows: 956 - Updated: 8/21/2009 - Published: 2/26/2009 - Bella, Edward
Guns and Roses by RosieWilde reviews
Bella and Edwardʼs relationship is interrupted by WWI. He dreams of glory as a soldier, and she must figure out life without him. A moving story of how friendship turns to love when survival is in doubt. ExB AU/AH. Finalist in the Indie TwiFic Awards.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 38 - Words: 156,809 - Reviews: 1491 - Favs: 678 - Follows: 386 - Updated: 8/4/2009 - Published: 12/13/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
The Highwayman by acirelemagne reviews
Edward chooses a life of danger over one of gentrified comfort. Did Bella, the beautiful innkeepers daughter influence his decision? Can he bring the two sides of his life together or is he destined to lose everything? Inspired by 'The Highwayman'.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 51,553 - Reviews: 441 - Favs: 265 - Follows: 394 - Updated: 6/27/2009 - Published: 8/31/2008 - Edward, Bella
She's Royal by halojones reviews
The Cullens are in Hawaii on holiday, but only Alice knows the reason why they are there-she's had a premonition that Edward would finally meet his true love. But when their meeting is ruined by unforeseen circumstances, will Alice set things right again?
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 20 - Words: 110,148 - Reviews: 2752 - Favs: 2,319 - Follows: 1,265 - Updated: 3/27/2009 - Published: 6/8/2008 - Complete