K 'n' K Productions
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Joined 03-08-09, id: 1860731, Profile Updated: 08-20-10
Author has written 1 story for Twilight.

(Hey you HAVE to read this out loud to get the FULL effect)

Hi we are actually 2 people (K AND K hint hint)

no not Siamese twins (hee hee)

we are XTRA (terrestrial) hyper cuz its like 10 at night on a Sunday (shut up conscience) (yes we are going to go to school tomorrow!)

we shall (lolz) be writing (weird... demented... any other adjective that you can pull out of your...ass) (shut up conscience AGAIN) stories later on.

Now we have to go cuz we have to sleep ya know (and because the other K (kake) is snorting while laughing and we keep laughing for absolutely no reason) (we even laughed at that while i read this whole thing out loud to see how it sounded) (we are even laughing while we write these stupid little () thing-a-ma-bobbers lolz :D)

(btw sorry that these stupid () things keep interrupting)

(OHHHH sorry again)

(and again)

(and again)

(okay were done now)

and here's the other K (kake)(the one that keeps snorting) Hehe!

HI!! ...sorry couldn't think of what to write there (and no I'm not the stupid K) HEY! (sorry) I just have to say i have a few stories up my sleeve (so beaware) (yes i do know it is spelt wrong) and I will be posting a story soon and need you guys help. PLeeeazze! =(

hey its the OTHER (awesomer) K and when Kake was writing beaware she paused at bea- and i thought to myself what the hell is she going to get from bea? when I voiced my thoughts she said BEANS!! lolz thought i should share that with the wonderful (you cant be awesome that's my thing) people that decided to read this stupid thing :)

F.Y.I. whenever we write something (if you haven't figured this out already) she will be in bold and i will be normal (yeah right!) writing.

love (or lerve... inside joke) you wonderful readers/writers (more props to the writers... sorry readers), we will write when we can and Kakes and I go to the same school so we will pondering many thoughts and writing what we can!

bye bye BYE! =D P.S. You can stop reading out loud now if you wanna( and if u weren't go back and read it again JK!= ). P.S.S. What does P.S. mean anyway??(I'm serious what does it stand for? Please if you know tell me or I may never know. Sad huh? )


hey its me again and i think someone once told me that P.S. stands for post script... is that right?

anyways I'm over at Kake's house again and its like freaking 4:45 i the morning (WE HAVE MONSTER!!) you should be TERRIFIED! lmao

anyways yeah i have nothing else to say here... yeah... hopefully a story will be up in the next month (that's our goal it's not promised though)


RANDOM QUOTES FROM US AND FRIENDS (AKA the weird ass shit that comes out of our mouths that we thought was funny and desided to share it)

OMJW two rapists cars(white vans that have few windows)!! ... Tres!! ... FOUR!! ... four is the number of death... 4= 1+3... 1...3... 13...B...BB... gasp Death Note!! we burst into laughter Why yes I did just make the connection of rapists and anime characters in the span of 10 seconds =P -Kat (yeah, I did all the talking but Kake laughed with me)

(At Kake) 'congradumalations you just single handedly ruined a perfectly good curse word (that ill still use and then shudder about after)' -again done by Kat on MSN

THATS WHAT S/HE SAID WALL!! (and yes we did steal that from someone)

Does it really go up that high? -Kat


If you lost the game, copy and paste this on your profile. (I fell for that... thrice!!).. DAMNIT!!

I understand how rock can beat scissors. And I get how scissors can beat paper. But how the hell can paper beat rock?! What paper is suppose to magically wrap itself around rock? Well, why can't paper do this to scissors? Actually screw scissors! Why cant paper do this to people?Why aren't there pieces of collage ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they try to take notes? THEY CAN'T! You know why? Because paper can't beat shit. So whenever I play rock, paper, scissors, I always choose rock. Then when someone claims to have beaten' with paper. I punch them with my already clenched fist and when I break their nose I say, "Oh. I'm sorry I thought that paper would protect you. Bitch!"

Always forgive your enemies-nothing annoys them so much.

If pain is beauty I must be fucking gorgeous.

Life isnt passing me by, its trying to run me over.

WIWAVS-wishing i was a vampire syndrome.(yea)

If at first you dont succeed, cheat, repeat untill caught, then lie.

I live in a world of rainbows,hearts,bunnies,and unicorns. The rainbow is only in shades of grey and black. The hearts are broken and bleeding. The bunnies are acting all emo again and the unicorns are cutting themselves with their horns. . . all in all its my perfect life.

I used to be normal untill i met the freaks I call my friends.

They say "Guns dont kill people, people kill people". Well I think guns help. If you stood there with a pointed finger and yelled "bang" I dont think you would kill many people.

Right now i'm having amnesia and deja-vu at the same time. I think i've forgotten this before.

Some people are like slinkies. . . they're not good for anything but its fun to watch them fall down the stairs.

SAVE THE EARTH. It's the only planet with chocolate.(Hell yes!)

Who ever said "Nothing was impossible" obviously never tried slamming a revolving a door.

All tresspassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.

I'm the kind of person who will burst out laughing in the middle of dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.

Emmett Cullen: stronger than you since 1916 (MINEEEEEE!!)

Jasper hale: charming ladies since 1843 (and he's MINE!)

Alice Cullen:quirkier than you since 1901

Rosalie Hale:better than you since 1916

Edward Cullen:hotter and spicier than you since 1901

Bella Swan: luckyer (not) than you since 1990

TEAM ROSALIE: because deep down we all think she's awesome.

TEAM JASPER: because he can snap at me anytime. (raises eyebrows and evily smiles)

TEAM ESME: because she's the coolest mother ever.

TEAM EMMETT: because we all love a guy with muscles. (Hell YEA!)

TEAM EDWARD: because we wish all guys were this perfect. (oh nooo!!) (I agree)

TEAM CARLISLE: because all doctors should be this hot.

TEAM BELLA: because she's Edward's girl. (sucks for her lol)

TEAM ALICE: because seeing things before they happen rocks.

They laugh because I'm different. . . I laugh because they are all the same.

Procrastinators unite. . . tomorrow.

1 out of 4 people are insane. Look at your three best friends if its not them its you. (but its all of us!!)

You cry i cry,

You hurt i hurt,

You jump off a bridge,

I get a paddle boat and save your sorry ass!

I love you, but if zombies chase after us, I'm tripping you.

Dont run in school, gliding is more fun.

When it rains on my party I burst out my slip 'n' slide.

Apparently 1 in 5 people are chinese, there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. It's either my mom or dad, my older brother Ian, or my younger brother Ho-chan-chu, but i think its Ian. (hehehe)

Smile and the whole world will smile with you, laugh and they'll all think you're on drugs. (lolz i kno right!)

When you get caught looking at him just remember he was looking back.

Smiles and tears, giggles and laughs, late night calls and cute photographs, I'll be there for you till da day of my death, besties forever till my very last breath.

If con is the opposite of pro, is congress the opposite of progress?

I ran with scissors and lived!(That would be a great acomplishment for me, glad I haven't tried!) (same)

When it hurts to look back and you are scared to look ahead, look beside you and I will be there.

Before you reply you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not.

My favorite word is sarcasm.

I'm not insane... i just do whatever the voices tell me to.

I dont suffer from insanity i enjoy every minute of it.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Why are the Force and duct tape the same?-
Both have a light and dark side and hold the universe together! (YEAH MAN!) (I

I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?(That is soooo me, it's not even funny!) (i thought it was kinda funny xD)

Make love not war!

QUOTES (by other people):

"I know water doesn't bite! What a stupid thing to say! Water doesn't have to bite you! You drown in it you moron!" -Stewie Griffin

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers. - Homer Simpson

Die, v.: To stop sinning suddenly. -Elbert Hubbard

"The only limitation you will ever have is the limitation of your own thinking."
~ James Arthur Ray~

'Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain!'

"cuz it's a guilty pleasure deciding whether you were ever mine or not but the truth's apparent that you weren't ever mine to start." -Hit the Lights (band)


I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.
I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.
I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.
We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.
I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.
I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.
I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.
I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.
We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.
I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.
I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.
I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.
I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.
I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.
I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.
I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me.
I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.
I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love.
I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male.

At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
it all over his lap.

When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by
jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.

When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion.
You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.

When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
thanked him by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
him by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus and
carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
how deep he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the

When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him . You
thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their

And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART.

If you love your dad, post this on your profile

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile
If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile
If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile (MORE LIKE BOTH OF US!!)
If you have ever felt the undenilable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile. (kake...)(lol)
98 percent of teenagers do or have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who haven't, copy & paste this in your profile.
If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.
If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.
If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.
If you think fighting is fun, but war is pointless, copy this into your profile.
If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile. (oh my jasper that happens to me ALL the time!!)
If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile. (aww its just me sad face)
If you have ever argued with yourself and LOST, then copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.
If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on
your profile.
If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this into your profile.
If you believe that talking to yourself, you're actually just having a normal conversation with you brain, then copy and paste this on your profile!
If you have broke out in tears for no reason, and then laughed while still crying copy and paste this onto your profile!
If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.
If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.
If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile
30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile
If you are an obsessive fan of a single character, pairing, etc., then copy and paste this into your profile
If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're a girl and get sick and tired of guys assuming that you're weak and can’t fight, copy and paste this into your profile.
Drugs are bad news. If you want to spread the word, copy and paste this into your profile.
Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.
If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile
If you're easily confused or confuzzled add this to your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile

98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like bagels

If you've ever had a random laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile. :D :P

If you like Twilight, copy and paste onto your profile. (I love Twilight)

If you think the school week is way too long and weekends are way too short, copy this onto your profile.

My friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile.

If you are always pressing one button when you mean to press another, copy this onto your profile. (MKS!! i.e. Moving Key Syndrome ~we made that up one day when we kept typing to fast and spelled things wrong lol~)

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica(real name)(i always change my penname)(tehehehe), PurpleBunniesWillRuleTheWorld, Roxxi-and-Ali, IsabellaMarieSwan123, Paper Hearts and Paper Cuts, mahalo4ursupport, Kuro Uchiha, Sacra Nox, Haruko-Uzumaki, Heza-chan x3, totalnarutofangirl85, Kakashi Forever, Rin Saizuchi, Passionette, K 'n' K Productions

If you have no life, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are one of those few people who actually want to stay a child, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you enjoy copy-and-pasting things into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If the majority of your free time is spent reading manga, watching anime, playing video games or writing fanfiction, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tried to go into the backyard and ran into the glass door that you didn't see, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you believe that the pink bunnies of doom are really out to get you copy and paste this in your profile.

If Fanfiction is to you like MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever choked on air (or any other substance that you thought impossible to choke on), copy this in your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile. (3 times now 12-31-09) (NEW MOON! I kno you all think we're demented for laughing at the part when Edward leaves, but... DID YOU NOT HEAR THE PERVERTEDNESS!! lol. "I'm coming."says Bella. "I don't want you to come." Edward says angrily.)

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If keyboards hate you, copy and paste this into your profile.(MKS, man it scuks)

If you don't have a problem with homosexuals, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don’t have a problem with bisexuals, copy and paste this into your profile

I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you have ever stayed up past 5:00 in the morning just because you friggin' could, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you said it copy and paste this to your profile

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile.

I don't care what people think of me. If you live life that freely, let the world know and copy this into your profile!

I'm crazy. So what? If you're crazy and proud, copy this into your profile!

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, Queen S of Randomness 016, Light Dragon SunsSong, Neassa, Kimiko, Ocean's Nocturne of the COCA, luvablenerd, whitestar091, roxasxnamine4evr Passionette, K 'n' K Productions

If you are really random, copy this into your profile.

93 of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 who would ask, "What was your first clue?", copy and paste this into your profile.

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.

SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.

If you rarely to never take anything seriosly, copy this into your profile.

If you are a tomboy, and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

OK just so you kno and aren't confuzzled when you read this BOLD is Kake, if its both of us is underlined and if its just me ill just put a K in () things like this (K)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be annorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy. (K)
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. (K)
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. (K)
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fking them all.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. (K)
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi. (K)
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly... or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7 (K)
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Fitch.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino. (K)
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social. (K)
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE... So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw MANGA so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak. (I don't agree but she threatened me with a finger shaped gun)
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I wear A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins (K)
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan (K)
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED. (K)
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick (K)
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting. (K)
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I an friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problem
I like FIRE so i MUST be an arsonist. (K)

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The Sacrifice by ElCullen reviews
"Ahh, Isabella" he said and I found my self looking straight into Lord Voldemort's red eyes… Edward left, Bella was changed but what if things took a turn towards the ultimate destruction? Bella and Edward OOC. Canon Pairings
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 68,709 - Reviews: 886 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 266 - Updated: 3/11/2015 - Published: 4/18/2009
Something New by theonly-tatertot reviews
Mysterious and unknown, but they ran the school. They have power, they have charisma, they have it all. Everyone immediately moves around them, doesn't make contact. It is the most unusual thing I have seen in all my years attending high school. They let of a dangerous vibe, but I just have to know them. I have to figure them out. A/H. Alice/Jasper/Bella
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,253 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 52 - Updated: 10/23/2013 - Published: 4/4/2009 - Alice, Bella, Jasper
In This Life by DebsTheSlytherinSnapefan reviews
Harry was adopted by a couple who move to America. His adopted parents die leaving him with his adopted uncle who abuses him. He attends Forks high school, meets the Cullen's who show him how good life can be. Sirius finds out where Harry is in the nick of time. He's adopted by Sev and Sirius, just as his parents and twin enter his life. He shows them the door. A war is brewing...
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 56 - Words: 139,480 - Reviews: 2478 - Favs: 2,418 - Follows: 1,734 - Updated: 7/30/2012 - Published: 5/6/2009 - Harry P., Edward - Complete
Beautiful Disaster by Dlvvanzor reviews
When it becomes apparent that touching the Death Note isn't the only way to regain memories, L must do the impossible to save the one he loves. But with Mello and Near disappearing and an addictive Death Note... LxL, Light POV. Character death. REWRITE.
Death Note - Rated: M - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 49 - Words: 117,349 - Reviews: 1148 - Favs: 615 - Follows: 216 - Updated: 10/11/2011 - Published: 6/16/2009 - Light Y., L - Complete
Bored of Eternity by xx-twilight7-xx reviews
The Cullens, including Bella, are bored out of their minds. There are too many random things to describe. How much fun can you get up to with the Wii, toothbrushes, llamas, evil Jasper, fake blood and much more? Canon Pairings. Extreme OOC
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 48 - Words: 115,332 - Reviews: 1044 - Favs: 253 - Follows: 141 - Updated: 10/6/2011 - Published: 7/14/2008 - Complete
I Married My Ex Boss by tinklove reviews
Bella is forced to go to Vegas with her sister-in-law to cheer up after a bad breakup. Edward, who is Bella’s ex-boss, has a meeting in Vegas. They meet, get drunk and end up married. She asks for divorce, he asks for 6 months. Canon-couples. Lemons!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 50 - Words: 217,271 - Reviews: 3693 - Favs: 4,432 - Follows: 1,745 - Updated: 9/4/2011 - Published: 5/29/2009 - Edward, Bella - Complete
Long Road to Ruin by Dance Elle Dance reviews
Jasper would know that beautiful brunette anywhere; she saved his life when he was little. That was why he was so surprised to see her in Forks...that, and the fact that she hadn't aged since the day they met. JasperBella, vamp AU
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 41 - Words: 160,178 - Reviews: 994 - Favs: 1,106 - Follows: 650 - Updated: 7/23/2011 - Published: 5/28/2009 - [Jasper, Bella] - Complete
Red Moon by Lil-Rahl reviews
Four months after Edward and the Cullens leave. Bella's vampire bite starts acting up in strange ways. Without the help of the Cullens, Bella is left alone to deal with what may happen. Epilouge now added!
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 36,068 - Reviews: 877 - Favs: 836 - Follows: 385 - Updated: 6/15/2011 - Published: 5/1/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Unexpected by Nicholh2008 reviews
Bella wakes up in a strangers bed, her attempt at forgeting the past didn't work out so well, and now she's going to have to deal with some unexpected events, including finding the mystery man and telling him some life altering news. Violence, lang. & lem *CURRENTLY ON HOLD*
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 12 - Words: 19,409 - Reviews: 481 - Favs: 296 - Follows: 345 - Updated: 6/2/2010 - Published: 2/11/2009 - Bella, Edward
Long, Tall, Texan by BamaBabe reviews
Bella is going to grad school in Texas and her friends decide to join her. Little do they know that she has an agenda of her own. AH, non-canon. BellaxJasper OOC M for future chapters & language
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 42 - Words: 106,651 - Reviews: 1397 - Favs: 1,286 - Follows: 667 - Updated: 3/18/2010 - Published: 3/10/2009 - Jasper, Bella - Complete
Not all Wounds are Healed by Time by irishgirl686 reviews
So, this takes place after Edward says his goodbye in New Moon. He allows one other person to see Bella before the Cullens leave, and it's Carlisle. Story continues from there. enjoy and review.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 42 - Words: 79,533 - Reviews: 2220 - Favs: 1,430 - Follows: 897 - Updated: 11/29/2009 - Published: 12/21/2008 - Bella, Carlisle - Complete
Resurgence by RLD Flame-point Callie-co reviews
After Edward leaves Forks, Claire and Peter move in...changing Bella's life, and theirs, in ways none of them ever imagined. New Moon, Eclipse & S3: Villains AU with eventual Bella/Peter romance. The Cullens do not appear in this story. *Edited to fix formatting issues 5/31/2012*
Crossover - Twilight & Heroes - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 33 - Words: 106,611 - Reviews: 491 - Favs: 310 - Follows: 169 - Updated: 10/12/2009 - Published: 12/10/2008 - [Bella, Peter P.] Claire B. - Complete
Hopes, Wishing and Wish Granting by The Catastrophic Teacup reviews
Bella's a genie and Edward found the bottle in which she resides. Five wishes, falling in love and various obstacles in their relationship... how will they manage to cope? ExB, all other canon pairings. All human
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 44,368 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 9/18/2009 - Published: 2/15/2009 - Bella, Edward
Parkville Academy by icecoldkiss reviews
ALL-HUMAN! When Bella Swan transferred to Parkville Academy, she didn't think her life could get any worse. That is, until a certain encounter in the bathroom leads her to a whirlwind ride with a Mr. Edward Cullen.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 29 - Words: 58,135 - Reviews: 282 - Favs: 143 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 8/31/2009 - Published: 12/4/2008 - Bella, Edward
Mistletoe by Don'tLetThemGetYouDown reviews
Can I kiss you?" Like he needed to ask. "I don't think my boyfriend would like that very much." I whispered stopping my assault to the side of his face. He froze as if suddenly realizing that Mike existed. I nibbled on his ear. "But I know I would." Lemon
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 39 - Words: 49,261 - Reviews: 1755 - Favs: 1,339 - Follows: 606 - Updated: 8/24/2009 - Published: 9/6/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
You Are Mine by silverwings1986 reviews
This is the sequal to "Our Little Secret." Enjoy.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 22,099 - Reviews: 668 - Favs: 572 - Follows: 325 - Updated: 7/31/2009 - Published: 11/10/2008 - Bella, Felix - Complete
What If Things Were Different by hollytiger reviews
AU. Rated R for sexual content, language and well, yeah you get my drift. HBP during and after Hermione's comfort scene with Harry on the staircase. This is how the story should have been. will ignore DH completely but the horcruxes will still be in.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,689 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 68 - Published: 7/15/2009 - Harry P., Hermione G.
Emo Singer Bella by bree.the.vampier reviews
Bella is Emo but she loves singing. her family is very very rich. what will happen when they move to the small town of Forks? will Bella still take her pain out on herself? will she meet another person like her? BETTER SUMARY INSIDE!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 55,601 - Reviews: 532 - Favs: 302 - Follows: 255 - Updated: 7/1/2009 - Published: 9/14/2008 - Bella
catwoman by BonBon294 reviews
edward nad bella are back from italy but bella gets into an accident when she wakes up she is not the same, human bella. sorry relly bad at summaries :P
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,982 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 6/30/2009 - Published: 5/14/2009 - Bella
X5 929 by Aldiggity reviews
How will our favourtive vampires fair when they stumble across our favourite transgenics? AU/OOC.
Crossover - Dark Angel & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,562 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 6/23/2009 - Published: 5/25/2009 - Alec, Bella
The Red Line by WinndSinger reviews
Edward is an exotic male dancer. Bella is a college student studying psychology and needs a subject to do her thesis on. Bella pays Edward to belong to her for 2 weeks so she can study him. Things soon get very interesting between them.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 40 - Words: 351,671 - Reviews: 19626 - Favs: 12,611 - Follows: 5,751 - Updated: 5/1/2009 - Published: 1/26/2009 - Edward, Bella
THE BLEEDING DOVE by neglectedxxpoison reviews
Bella is into extreme's and can't get enough.She join's a gang and just when she's lived through it all and achieves the highest rank she is sent to live with Charlie.How will she react to Edward now that she's been through hell?Edward:vamp / Bella: OOC
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,506 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 2/26/2009 - Published: 8/12/2008 - Bella, Edward
Facing My Past by Jealous of Bella reviews
Bella's the nerd in school until her parents divorce and her mom takes her away to Phoenix. The next year, Bella comes back a confident and beautiful girl. Everyone notices including the playboy of Forks High, Edward Cullen. Can he make Bella notice him?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,494 - Reviews: 240 - Favs: 137 - Follows: 214 - Updated: 8/18/2008 - Published: 7/13/2008 - Bella, Edward
The Quiet by Mikanis reviews
Perhaps it is here, in the quiet, that I allow myself to acknowledge just how much…how very much, I want him. Oneshot
Death Note - Rated: M - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,405 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 13 - Published: 4/19/2008 - L, Light Y. - Complete
A Charmed Life by luv2beloved reviews
Bella, pregnant and with unusual gifts, no one with answers until 3 sisters walk into her life. You might say they are Charmed, and baring more than just baby gifts, but answers to all of her questions. Bella soon finds out more about her family. Plz R&R
Crossover - Charmed & Twilight - Rated: M - English - Drama/Fantasy - Chapters: 20 - Words: 26,214 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 193 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 1/15/2008 - Published: 12/13/2007 - Complete
Salt in your wounds by Bitter Red Irony reviews
[COMPLETE] Hermione and Draco have rough summers and both go through some changes. Draco teachers Hermione that sometimes the thing that hurts you the most, is the only thing that can help ::Darkfic::
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 59,090 - Reviews: 775 - Favs: 433 - Follows: 67 - Updated: 12/7/2005 - Published: 8/17/2004 - Hermione G., Draco M. - Complete
I Loved Her First Heartland
A one-shot song-fic based on the song I Loved Her First by Heartland. Charlie's thoughts when he see's Bella and Edward dancing at their wedding. BxE CxS
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,177 - Favs: 4 - Published: 4/1/2010 - Complete