Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.
"In the end, it's not going to matter how many breaths you took, but how many moments took your breath away." -Unknown.
I'm just a girl. Fanfiction has been my guilty drug since 2007 and I've been coming back for more ever since. I'm a total sucker for a romantic-action-flick who spends most of their days snuggled up with a book and a computer. I'm totally out of touch with reality. I like to sketch things in this cheap, 15 cent composition notebook.
I'm the cheap-ass, brace-faced, internet addicted, history and literature obsessed, hopelessly pathetic, socially awkward intellectual bad-ass that curses like a sailor who your parents never warned you about.
Gene: (Complete) Drabble, 100 words. Leah Clearwater, Jacob Black, Renesmee Cullen / "Isabella always came out victorious. It seems the gene wasn't passed down." Renesmee's view on Blackwater.
Since I always forget to add this little god forsaken thing to my stories, I'll just add it here:
Disclaimer: All of the characters that I have not created myself belong to their rightful owner and author of the Twilight Saga, Stephanie Meyer. Anything that I do happen to create -- please do not use these without my permission.
And here comes the part we've all been dreading the most. Ranting about the 'Twilight Saga' by SM.
Shit. I don't even know where to start. Well, first, let me say that Bella is a total Mary-Sue and Edward is her equally annoying counter-part, Gary-Stu. You would think that having a cop for a father would make you aware of things that people with common sense are aware of. Like, the fact your boyfriend watches you sleep -- wait, were they even 'official' at that point? Let's go out on a whim here and say no. So, this guy who has this attraction to you (actually, bitch, it was your blood and the fact that your so fucking stupid that he only got static from your air-headed cranium) watches you while you sleep, eat, and stalks you when your having a night out on the town. Sure, sure, he saved you from that serial-murder-rapist and your thankful for that, but he almost kills you on the way back by driving like a fucking lunatic.
So, after you two have no been officially declared 'boyfriend and girlfriend' (back in fourth grade, much?) he takes you to meet his family. His family of bambi-killing disco-ball sparkling vampires. I don't give a damn how 'good' with weird you are. BITCH ARE YOU SUICIDAL? (Oh wait, you are, New Moon proved that) You shouldn't give half a shit about Eddie-boy's promises to make sure you aren't hurt/eaten alive. It's survival of the fittest, woman! Let someone else be their chew-toy. Now, after you meet your leech boyfriend's family, you attend one of their thunder strike baseball games. Cool, a friendly game of the classic American sport. Oh, wait, who are those people coming out the forest? Oh, they're only the people who in several chapters later want you dead (Or should I say in their tummies?).
Your wonderful Edward (cough, potential homosexual, cough) took you to meet his family and now you're being hunted 'cause you smell tasty. Great. Now, we all know what happened afterward. Edward saves her, blah blah blah. BUT HERE IS ONE THING I WOULD LIKE TO SAY: Everything would of turned out right if Edward wouldn't of been able to save her, and she would be a vamp. WE ALL KNOW IT'S TRUE. No Re-name-me-dear-god, no Jacob-pining-over-whiney-white-bitch. Her and McCullenFag would get they're happy little ending, and all would be good in the world.
EXCEPT FOR LEAH FUCKING CLEARWATER.
I cannot express how much I despise SM for putting Leah through all that shit, even if if she is a fictional charachter. First of all, let's start off with the Sam/Emily buisniess, like everyone else. Okay. Leah and Sam dated all through-out their high school years. Emily surely has heard Leah brag about her wonderful boyfriend, right? So she would know exactly how much Leah loved him. Or at least, have a good impression. BUT, when Sam imprints on her, she obviously never bothered to fight it -- and even if she did, she obviously did'nt do a good enough job. Emily Young/Uley does not deserve a happy ending. I don't blame Sam half as much as I blame Emily, because the woman could of chosen friendship, but because she's so fucking plain and there's nothing special about her (until Sam came 'round and made her the pack's food whore) she decided, 'Hey, you know what? I'm gonna settle for my cousin's/sister's/bestfriend's fiancee, 'cause I fucking suck.
Personally, Emily sounds like a naive vindictive bitch. They call Leah cruel? Well, she didn't jump in the sack with her cousin/sister/best friend's boyfriend. Those scars don't compare to the one's on Leah's heart. For me, it sounds like Emily's all, "It's so hard to think about Leah's pain when Sam has me surrounded with so much love." Love? LOVE? You call that shit love? Dear mother of God, I would probably kill someone just for imprinting on me. So some wolf-y instinct inside of you just automatically told you 'She's the one, bro. If she's of age, make her pop out some babies. Marry the bitch. Ditch everyone else. Only she matters. If she ain't of age, wait until she is. Then make her pop babies out her vag.' Who the hell would actually want that? Do Emily, Kim and Rachel not realize that if it wasn't for the Cullen's, thus provoking the wolves to phase, thus the triggering of the urge to 'imprint' they wouldn't have eve looked twice at the guys? And the only reason they did look twice at them is because 1) They're ripped, tanned, and always shirtless and 2) Because they were following the little bitches around, which by the way is sadly Edward 'I'm so tortured' Cullen behavior.
As the books and SM says herself — Jared had never before even noticed Kim, the girl in one of his classes, until he turned into a giant mythical fairy tail douche bag werewolf shape shifter with his best friend Sam 'Love em and leave em' Uley. Then, 'BAM WHACKA BOOOOOOM' "Hi. I'm Jared. I'm tied to you forever." I would love love love if someone wrote the first impressions of all the imprints on their ... imprinters? Claire, sweet Jesus, poor Claire, she's going to have to grow up with Quil by her side. Don't get me wrong — I love me some Quil, bro, but growing up with a teenage boy by your side constantly is not healthy. Have Claire's parents ever wondered that he could totally be a potentential pedophile in the making? Or, for that matter, already one?
I'm just saying — If my child was hanging around some eighteen-year-old boy that walked around the reservation half naked and coming out of the woods with other boys I would be: freaked. the. fuck. out. Ugh, don't even get me started on Re-name-me. What type of name is Reneesmee, anyway? Ruh-nez-may. More like, Please-kill-me. See, I can barely even the blame the kid. But we all know that if since Bella's her mother and Edweird is her father, the spawn is going to grow up a spoiled brat. The word 'No' won't even be part of her vocabulary and Lord knows she'll need it.
Then there's the hinting at the end of BD that Jacob will have some competetion with Nahuel over the hybrid. And for the first and last time ever, I will agree with Isabella Marie Swan Cullen. "I don't care if she is the only one of his kind that isn't his half sister." JACKPOT! Jacob deserves someone that's not only of his species, but someone worth loving that can understand his previous pains and worries, someone he can talk to about everything and someone who won't judge him because he can go from furry to naked in one-point-three seconds.
Which, (Damn did I stray away from my point) brings be back to my favorite charachter of the Twilight Saga, and the only charachter who seems to have a bit of realistic pain accuring in her life. Leah Clearwater.
Now, they think the hybrid is special? Stop kidding me, people, she's got four others of her kind. Leah on the other hand has no one, though she doesn't have the ability the Cullens had to go out there and find someone like her. She's a female (an attractive female, according to Jacob Black) stuck in the heads of teenage boys, one of which was her ex-fiancee and another her kid brother. I don't see how she made it. I truly don't. Now, there's speculation that the spawn won't be able to have kids with her vampire-human genetics. My own opinion is that once she reaches maturity her body will freeze at the physical age of eighteen, though in all reality she will be seven, and she won't be able to have children, unless she gets knocked up at six.
Yeah. I'm not going any further into the hybrid getting knocked up before she hits the double-digits, it freaks me out enough as it is. Not just the fact she'll be a mother before she gets her period (by regular human standards) but there's a slight (Okay, according to SM there's a pretty damn big chance, but for the sake of Leah's future happiness and my insanity, we will say slight) chance that the father of those children she bares will be Jacob. Truthfully, I'm rooting for Nahuel. Jacob Black deserves way better than his ex-puppy love's daughter. Not only will he end up Bella's son-in-law, but he'll be Charlie's grandson-in-law and since there's hinted Charlie and Sue, if they got married, that would make him Leah and Seth's nephew-in-law. And speaking of that, Quil is Jacob's second cousin, and if Quil marries Claire that will make him Leah's nephew-in-law (?) which would make most of the pack related, with the exception of Brady, Collin, and Jared. Lucky anti-incestuous bitches.
Back to what I was saying about Leah (how do I get so side-tracked?). Now, there's always the whole 'barren' thing at question. Another one of my over thought opinions is that Leah's body will only allow her to bear children once she stops phasing, or, her body heals so fast from her being a werewolf that she doesn't get the signs that she's on her menstrual cycle (cramps, blood, discharge, etc). Not only did her fiancee leave her for her cousin, then her dad died, and from what is implied, she blames herself. SM really fucked Leah over. She never even had a chance to get over the betrayal of two of the people she loved the most because she was cheated out of the one thing she needed the most: closure.
I can see why she's a total harpy towards everyone. Left and right everyone she's surrounded by is getting their happy endings, Bellafail got one, and Reneesmee just might get one with Jacob. Who does she have? Oh right, her vibrator. She could always hook up with Embry, but fate's probably out to get her so he'll imprint right after they show any interest in each other. Thus, my dislike of the spawn and most of the Cullens (well, really the little mini family, Edward-Bella-Nessie) I support Blackwater.
Jacob needs someone who will understand him. Leah's a shape shifter herself. Jacob needs someone that understands his loses and pains, his mother died, and he was left heartbroken by the girl he loved. Leah's father passed away and Sam ditched her for a happily ever after while she was living in a once upon a time (I STOLE THIS QUOTE FROM SOMEONE. Read it on a summary. I have no idea who). Leah and Jacob go together. I'm not talking about their races — though they're similar skin, hair, and eye color do add to them being the perfect fictional, 'match-made-in-heaven.' Jacob and Reneesmee's child would be rather gorgeous, I admit — but Leah and Jacob's would be ten times hotter. Leah and Jacob make sense while Jacob and Nessie are just ew. And if on whim, the little hybrid could see this, EVERYTIME YOU KISS JACOB (If you ever get the chance) REMEMBER HE MADE OUT WITH YOUR MOM.
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