Habeous Corpus
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Joined 03-20-09, id: 1873079, Profile Updated: 10-31-10
Author has written 23 stories for Mentalist, NCIS, Psych, and Seussical.

You guys are so sweet! My inbox is flooded with Favorite Author, Favorite Story, Story Alerts, and reviews! Thank you all! Hugs~

My writing style is very down-to -earth and sometimes lyrical. Romances are not my cup of tea, although I did write one. Mature Rated Fiction is of no interest to me. I will not write it or read it. Except in EXTREME cases (as in, "Rated to be safe," no explicit content, yadda yadda. ) I like telling parts of stories though third-party characters, and the rest through third-person omniscient. (If you don't know what that is, ask an English teacher. :P )

I own no copyrights. I write these stories as a labor of love and adoration (and preservation of my own sanity) for the people who do own the copyrights. I'm making no money from these. It would be nice, but illegal. :/ So, no, no money. No ownership. Okay? Okay. :D

RANDOM STUFF:

I joined Jello-forever! I kept me name, Habeous Corpus.

A story alert/favorite alert says a thousand words. (Okay, okay, not in the alert email. You know what I mean. Thousand word emails are a little cumbersome.)

I really don't believe in ghosts, but they're fun to play with in stories! I am also highly opposed to violence, drugs, and crime. (Yet I write murder/crime fics. I don't understand me sometimes. Oh well.)

I hate it when people say, "there was a pregnant pause." LAME! What, that pause is going to start having little "Pause, Jr"s? Does that make all pauses female? So many questions...

If you start expecting the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected the expected?

I’m into THEATER AND ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a jerk.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer.
I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a vampire fetish. (That's called instinct. "Ow!" [stick body part in pain in your mouth])
I'm a GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress.

I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's butt.
I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a tomboy.
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant.
I'm FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual.
I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict.
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian.
I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug-addicted hippie.
I'm INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs.
I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life.
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up.
I have GREEN SKIN, so I MUST be a wicked witch. (He-he, Wicked fans unite!)
I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention.
I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean.
I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.
I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare.
I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore with a jock boyfriend.
I'm a JEW, so I MUST be greedy.
I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo homosexual with AIDS.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head.
I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports.
I like CATS, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time.
I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi.
I'm IN BAND, so I MUST be a geek.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.
I'm an OVER 16 YEAR OLD TEEN MALE signed with DISNEY, so I MUST be a GAY, CHILDISH IDIOT.
I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm ALWAYS SMILING AND LAUGHING, so I MUST have a great life.
I'm a TEEN GIRL who likes to HAVE GOOD NATURED FUN with my FRIENDS, so I MUST be a WHORE, SLUT, and a LESBIAN.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too.
I COPIED AND PASTED THIS INTO MY PROFILE, so I MUST be a plagiarist. (LOL, public License. No copyright, no ownership. :3)
I like to READ, so I MUST be a nerd.
I FROWN a lot, so I MUST be a nerd.
I get BAD GRADES, so I MUST be a slacker who doesn't try.
I like the JONAS BROTHERS, so I MUST be a TEENIE BOPPER, OBSESSED FAN GIRL.
I'm a JEW, so I MUST hate all Germans.
I'm a HANNAH MONTANA FAN, so I MUST be childish and immature.
I'm POLITE to TEACHERS, so I MUST be a teacher's pet.
I'm a TEENAGER who still likes the DISNEY CHANNEL, so I MUST be immature and childish
I don't have many friends, so I MUST be an emo goth who hates the world
I like sunlight, so I MUST be a vampire/werewolf slayer
I like the opera, so I MUST be an egotistical snob with way too much money (Ha! I wish...)
I have more than 5 friends, so I MUST be a prep
I wear pink, so I MUST be a rich preppy snob with family money
I like diamonds and pearls, so I MUST be controlling
I wear perfume/cologne, I MUST be a flirt ( I just wanna smell good... D:)


If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. (So true.)

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur pro!

If you've ever read/started to read a chapter in a fan fiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. (oops)

If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

~pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites, copy this in your profile.

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile

If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you generally crash on your couch even when your bed is free, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If random songs just pop into your head at any given momet, from 'I've Been Working On the Railroad', to the Animorph version of the Barney song (I hate you, you hate me, we're an alien family ect. Personally, I like this version better) to your most favorite song ever, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you can't figure out if these copy and paste things bug you or if you love them, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.

92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped up the stairs, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the frick'n trix, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever been poked and made a noise resembling that of a constipated animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

If you've ever imagined yourself killing off a fictional character so that you could steal her/his fictional boyfriend/girlfriend, copy this into your profile

IF YOU'VE EVER LEAPED DOWN THE HALLWAY OF A HOTEL AND TURNED THE CORNER AND SAW PEOPLE STARING AT YOU COPY AND PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which makes weird good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy & paste this onto your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you don’t dance to avoid injury to yourself and those around you, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that says pull (or vice versa) copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you have a ridiculously long profile, copy and paste this onto your profile to make it longer.

If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are that person who, after they post a story, check their stats minute after minute and shout for joy when you get ONE review... copy and paste this on your profile!

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten your name while introducing yourself, copy this to your profile

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If, for any particular reason, you have laughed during a movie that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach, the O.C., or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

if you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile

if you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.


One of my best friends died recently; I'm really upset. He was such a great guy and I miss him. Maybe you knew of him. Most people did. I hope it wasn't you who contributed to his death, otherwise I shall dispatch a vicious band of lions to disembowel you. Okay, I don't have a troupe of lions at my disposal, but I can find one, trust me. My friend was a paragon of amazing. His name was Common Sense. I am sorry to inform you of his demise. Mourn with me.

Dearly beloved…we gather here to say our goodbyes. Here he lies…

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.

Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate and teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Panadol, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student; but, could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.

Rest In Peace, my old friend.


MURPHY'S LESSER-KNOWN LAWS:

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. And feet are for finding earrings you drop.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well..

One bright morning...
in the middle of the night,
two dead boys went out to fight
there they stood back to back
and faced each other
drew their swords
and shot each other.
the deaf policeman heard the noise
and came running to kill
the two dead boys.
If u dont believe my tale
i swear its true
ask the blind lady she saw it too!

FUN THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR

1) When a person in the elevator repeatedly pushes a button (such as "close" or "open") say, "Congratulations, you figured out that if you push the button 20 times, it works quicker"

2) When the elevator doors shut, assuringly say, "It's ok, they will open up again!"

3)Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

4) Whistle the first seven notes of "Its a Small World" incessantly.

5) Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

6) Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside down.

7) Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

8) When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.

9) Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.

10) Stare, grinning, at another passenger for awhile, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"

11) Meow occasionally.

12) Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.

13) Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

14) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

15) Stare at another passenger for awhile, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.

16) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

17) When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "Is that your beeper?"

18) Say "Ding!" at each floor.

19) Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.

20) Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.

21) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."

22) Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

23) Put a box on the floor and whenever somebody comes in, say "Do you hear clicking?"


Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost

Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away

Best Friend: Won't let me go away

Friend: Will help me up when I fall down

Best Friend: Will point and laugh because she tripped me

Friend: Will bail me out of jail

Best Friend: Will be sitting beside me saying "Dang, we screwed up"

Friend: Will go to a concert with me

Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me

Friend: Calls my parents "Mr." or "Mrs."

Best Friend: Calls my parents "Mom" or "Dad"

Friend: Asks me for my number

Best friend: Asks me for her number

Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public

Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.

Friends: Fade

Best Friends: Are 4 Ever

"Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk and the rest of it telling us to sit and shut up.” ~ Anonymous

"Ever stopped to think and forgot to start again?" ~ Anonymous

"My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil." ~ Anonymous

"When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade" ~ Anonymous

Don't skip alone. (Try walking up to someone and saying that with a straight face. Its hard.) Tallulah Pineapple

Geniuses can run into doors too.- Random Sticker

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you DO criticize them, you are a mile away and have their shoes. -Petunia Rose-Daisy

Why be nice to each other? Really? Well, try this: Wisdom 11&12:

22 4 Indeed, before you the whole universe is as a grain from a balance, or a drop of morning dew come down upon the earth. 23 But you have mercy on all, because you can do all things; and you overlook the sins of men that they may repent. 24 For you love all things that are and loathe nothing that you have made; for what you hated, you would not have fashioned. 25 And how could a thing remain, unless you willed it; or be preserved, had it not been called forth by you? 26 But you spare all things, because they are yours, O LORD and lover of souls,
1 for your imperishable spirit is in all things! 2 Therefore you rebuke offenders little by little, warn them, and remind them of the sins they are committing, that they may abandon their wickedness and believe in you, O LORD!
That isn't so hard to understand, now is it?

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Made of Scars by Lia Walker reviews
After a case gone wrong, Jane and Lisbon reflect. Feelings are revealed, emotions, and long-buried truths are unveiled. A must read for all: Jibson, and Jane/Pain fans! Been over a year but here is the revised version!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,100 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 2/25/2013 - Published: 1/6/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Thanatopsis by Divinia Serit reviews
Collection of oneshots- dealing with Jane/Lisbon, team fic, and a little Rigsby/VP. UPDATED. CH14- The Reckoning- written for Paint it Red Ficathon, Season 3 finale alternative scenario
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 14 - Words: 22,977 - Reviews: 197 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 8/7/2011 - Published: 10/21/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Insomnia by AmyLeeWarren reviews
And everyone thinks Patrick Jane has strange dreams. But, before long, she'll know everything he ever wanted to keep from her. Jane/Lisbon. Please read A/N on last page.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 7 - Words: 7,331 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 5/23/2011 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Closer by Ebony10 reviews
Jane and Lisbon find themselves in a sticky situation. Hostage type situation-rating just in case...
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 22,375 - Reviews: 419 - Favs: 156 - Follows: 108 - Updated: 12/26/2010 - Published: 1/24/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Five Times by tromana reviews
Oneshot Collection: Five examples of something that has happened to a character. New: Only Almost: or five times Jane and Lisbon almost kissed and the one time they actually did. Birthday fic for Chiisana Minako
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 22,482 - Reviews: 149 - Favs: 38 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 10/24/2010 - Published: 2/28/2010 - Teresa L., Patrick J.
Red Childhood by Koezh reviews
AUish, Jane's POV, he starts middle school meeting the CBI gang and Red John as kids but soon finds his life spiraling out of control...
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Angst - Chapters: 61 - Words: 80,343 - Reviews: 251 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 9/24/2010 - Published: 1/22/2010
I Shall Now Saw This Heart in Half by Chloe Winchester reviews
We're done, Magnus" "I don't ever want to see you again, Alec " Hearts are broken, but neither one did the breaking, so who, or what, did? Malec, as usual Emotionally!HurtMagnus Emotionally!HurtAlec eventual fluff Please review!
Mortal Instruments - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Mystery - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,715 - Reviews: 84 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 9/11/2010 - Published: 8/3/2010 - Alec L., Magnus B. - Complete
Chaos Theory by Chloe Winchester reviews
Spencer has been missing for 2 years, and when the BAU finds him, they find a broken and scared young man. And the worst of it, the man that took him is still out there. Some chapters rated M. Reidcentric NO SLASH set in season 2 Major Reid whumpage!
Criminal Minds - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 31 - Words: 48,662 - Reviews: 1255 - Favs: 755 - Follows: 375 - Updated: 7/16/2010 - Published: 12/28/2009 - S. Reid, D. Morgan - Complete
Bloody Hell by Chloe Winchester reviews
What if Red John hadn't simply left Patrick there? What if he had done something much worse? Hurt!Patrick. Tag to 2x23 NO SLASH
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,942 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 6/1/2010 - Published: 5/23/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Red Faces by madnxnw reviews
Ever mischievous when bored, Patrick Jane decides to put on a show in the office, much to the chagrin of Rigsby and VanPelt. --Pre-Rigsby/VanPelt relationship oneshot.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,219 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Published: 4/15/2010 - Complete
The Effect of Ricin by Wicked42 reviews
Spinoff of episode 2.15: Red Herring. What if Jane had actually eaten a bite of Julia's poisoned lunch? Slight Jane x Lisbon. Lisbon's POV.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Drama/Mystery - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,199 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 3/31/2010 - Published: 3/6/2010 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Sugar Rush by Chloe Winchester reviews
E/O Challenge:Coffee Challenge WOW: Coffee Castiel is introduced to caffeine. A crack fic
Supernatural - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 121 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 3 - Published: 3/21/2010 - Castiel, Dean W. - Complete
Hey, look! Strawberries! by iloveethementalisttt reviews
just abunchh of random drabbles, school is back in and sometimes youjust get bored in class; this is the end result! tell me what youthinkkkk. :
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 5,341 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 3/9/2010 - Published: 9/26/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Reverie by Cho by Arcadya reviews
The world ceased to exist when he slept. No one else seemed to notice. Cho tries to save the world, with one grungy city and two sidekicks, against two diabolical nemesis' or is it three ?
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 16 - Words: 39,564 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 3/9/2010 - Published: 10/5/2009 - Kimball C. - Complete
Cho's Sun by BFangz reviews
A slice of Cho life. A chance meeting with a pretty girl can lead to who knows what!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,219 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 2/27/2010 - Published: 2/24/2010 - Kimball C. - Complete
Pain and Fear by music-and-fairytales reviews
Lisbon winced as she looked in the mirror. So it did look as painful as it felt. Damn. Deep in thought, she reached for her concealer and began to try and hide the damage." - Jane goes with Lisbon to confront her abusive boyfriend.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,074 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/15/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Bad Feeling by Channel D reviews
Tony just has a feeling that something bad will happen today...and he is so right! In this story, I was asked to combine a crack!fic with character death, so I chose to kill off lots of people and have fun with it. Humor. One-shot.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,229 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/10/2010 - Complete
Hot? Certainly by les goddam reviews
CHAPTER UPDATE- Snowing? Seriously: “I think I threw up a little bit just then” Lisbon's hand went instinctively to her throat. He waggled his eyebrows “sexy”
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 5,154 - Reviews: 69 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 2/8/2010 - Published: 11/6/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Actions by Koezh reviews
Just a short story from Red John's point of view about killing Jane's family...
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 881 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/30/2010 - Red John - Complete
A' la Fin by Just Mosie reviews
This was the night that will forever continue to haunt them until the day the were to die.One that would scar them for all eternity. My entry for the January 2010 Challenge 'New Beginnings' at the Jello Forever Boards.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,130 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Published: 1/23/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
What If? by superwoman1015 reviews
What if Jane had come home earlier on that fateful night? What might have happened? This is definitely an AU, so if you don't like that sort of thing, don't read it. COMPLETE!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 52 - Words: 77,164 - Reviews: 735 - Favs: 121 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 1/17/2010 - Published: 5/20/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
A Meeting of Minds by House Calls reviews
What would happen if two of the most observant people were to cross paths? The Mentalist/House crossover. Now 100% complete and re-posted due to author error !
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,129 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 1/11/2010 - Published: 4/14/2009 - Patrick J. - Complete
Red Stains by iloveethementalisttt reviews
This is for an english short story we had to write, so of course i did the mentalist! excerpt: "There was a long steady beep and a red line horizontally crossing the Heart Rate Monitor machine. One of the doctors yelled for a crash cart..." warning:death.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,700 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Published: 1/8/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Forlorn souls by mtm reviews
A desperate, misguided soul was all it took.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,022 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 1/8/2010 - Published: 1/2/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Property Of: by Chloe Winchester reviews
Challenge WOW: Brand. Dean is in Hell, and he just cant take anymore. Hurt!Dean
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 310 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/3/2010 - Dean W., Alastair - Complete
Who Stole the Cookie? by Ebony10 reviews
A cookie is missing from the Serious Crimes Unit. And the culprit is about to find out just what a serious crime really is. Written for Tylah for the Jello Forever Secret Santa.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,239 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/2/2010 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Red River of Consciousness by TheAmethystRiddle reviews
It was a stream but much bigger, a hundred billion water droplets all forming to fall unbearably onto his brain, and each of them bearing her face. Jane/Lisbon.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,050 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 1/2/2010 - Published: 1/1/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Entropy by tromana reviews
Entropy. Chaos. A state of decay. Lisbon can only watch as Jane spirals into insanity. Not-so-secret-Secret-Santa gift for Divinia Serit. Complete.
Mentalist - Rated: M - English - Angst/Crime - Chapters: 11 - Words: 12,915 - Reviews: 170 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 12/30/2009 - Published: 11/27/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Oh, Sammy Boy by Chloe Winchester reviews
Challenge WOW: Shoe. Who's gonna tell Sammy it's okay now? Mild spoilers! Wee!Chester, Teen!chester and, well, Regular!Chester lol please R&R
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 706 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 39 - Published: 12/27/2009 - Sam W., Dean W. - Complete
Red haze of rage and regret by mtm reviews
A threat becomes reality and reality becomes a nightmare.
Mentalist - Rated: M - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 11 - Words: 14,671 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 12/22/2009 - Published: 12/14/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
A Difficult Choice by music-and-fairytales reviews
I'm sorry," she said tearfully, "but I need you to choose - Red John or me." Post-ep for the s1 finale, but with two possible endings - angst or fluff. You choose. Jello Forever Secret Santa present for Divinia Serit!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,956 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/19/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Present Danger by SpaceAnJL reviews
Why you should never take food from the SCU fridge...
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,335 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 12/10/2009 - Published: 7/31/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Broken heart by mtm reviews
When a broken heart is shattered, are you left with just a shell?
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,420 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 12/3/2009 - Published: 11/25/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
On the Other Side by celticgina reviews
What our happy little group thinks when they look back at us. For the November Jell-o Challenge
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 758 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/30/2009 - Complete
Every Rose and its Thorn by Chloe Winchester reviews
Tag to 2.08 Patrick's key to Red John is gone, and his hope has gone with it. Lots of Angst because it's my specialty. EmotionallyHurt!Patrick No Jisbon as usual. Please R&R ONESHOT
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,020 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/27/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Ask The Lonely by dizzy - in - the - izzy reviews
As the pain filled her, she told herself she'd fight. She would fight, no matter what, to protect the last gift that Patrick Jane ever gave her. Jisbon & VanRigsby.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 13 - Words: 31,234 - Reviews: 218 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 50 - Updated: 11/26/2009 - Published: 8/6/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Two Red Roses Across The Moon by SpaceAnJL reviews
The final part of Thanksgiving. Double-size chapter, for all you patient readers. And the impatient one - yes, I'm looking at you, FiveRoses...
Mentalist - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 21 - Words: 47,184 - Reviews: 287 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 11/5/2009 - Published: 8/24/2009
Like an open book by vespertine dreams reviews
Shawn and Patrick get the ability to read minds and learn some interesting things about their colleagues. Crack fic- runs alongside my Shawn/Patrick series. Slash- Shawn/Patrick. Reviews welcome.
Crossover - Psych & Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 860 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 41 - Follows: 7 - Published: 10/24/2009 - Shawn S., Patrick J. - Complete
Jezebel by Chloe Winchester reviews
Castiel has a problem in an alley. Short drabble, should be funny!
Supernatural - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 288 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 15 - Published: 10/4/2009 - Castiel, Dean W. - Complete
Bleeding Heart by Chloe Winchester reviews
Patrick can't take the silence. Not today. NO Jisbon Please R&R EmotionallyHurt!Patrick
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,086 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 3 - Published: 10/4/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Czar Of Awesome? by dizzy - in - the - izzy reviews
Cho has a little fun with the romantic feelings buzzing through the office. Jisbon & VanPelt/Rigsby.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,065 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 6 - Published: 10/4/2009 - Kimball C. - Complete
Rocking the Boat by Ebony10 reviews
Jane finds a surprising document on Lisbon's desk that leads to major changes. A fun, fluffy fic. Jisbon.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,060 - Reviews: 181 - Favs: 123 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 9/28/2009 - Published: 7/18/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Flirt by ch19777 reviews
How to pick up women and to taunt law enforcement professionals for years - Red John style. A nifty little piece of introspection, written for the September challenge at the Jello Forever board with the prompt "smile".
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,223 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/27/2009 - Red John - Complete
Victim by Eve215 reviews
Post Season 2 opener 2x01 . Jane is having a hard time with the fact that Sam called him a victim. No one had ever called him that before... he'd never thought of himself as one before. A one-shot. Jane/Lisbon friendship
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,184 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/26/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
The Land of Oz by Eve215 reviews
Disturbing dreams force Jane to question which reality is real. The one where he is consultant with the CBI or the one that scares him the most.. the one where he never left the mental institution.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Mystery - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,362 - Reviews: 79 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 9/26/2009 - Published: 5/23/2009 - Patrick J. - Complete
Red Jane by Broken Kindle reviews
Inspired by some of the theories about Red John. Lisbon catches Red John after he has dispatched Grace Van Pelt but Red John isn't quite the person she expected him to be... Contains very slight hints at Jisbon and some Rigspelt. One-shot.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Crime/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,255 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/20/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
The Gravity of Words by kitten4979 reviews
Mostly unrelated and random chapters based on prompts from a 100 Quills challenge. Jisbon/Jello/Lane centered but they will not necessarily be the entire focus. The rest of the team needs love too. Warning: some AU and/or OOCness may ensue.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 22 - Words: 12,099 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 9/16/2009 - Published: 6/1/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J.
Red Blood and Blue Hands by Lakshmibai reviews
Patrick Jane and the CBI investigate the death of Robin Wood and bump into Buffy Summers and her friends. Jane has to confront the fact that the occult really does exist, and the two need to work together to catch the killers.
Crossover - Buffy: The Vampire Slayer & Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 14,443 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 9/10/2009 - Published: 8/23/2009 - Buffy S., Patrick J. - Complete
13 Shades Of Red by dizzy - in - the - izzy reviews
It was one of his favorite past times, making her blush. 13 different blushes, based off prompts. Last Prompt: Engagement - “We already act like a married couple.” She pointed out, and he shrugged. Then why not make it official.” He said.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 16,531 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 9/7/2009 - Published: 8/5/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Life by Penelope Louise reviews
A collection of The Mentalist one shots for you to enjoy! Jisbon, VanRigsby etc.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 6,649 - Reviews: 150 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 9/6/2009 - Published: 7/24/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
The not so usual suspect by ElmoSmelmo reviews
What if Hotch found out about Reids drug addiction back in season 2 and fired him. Now Reid is having a mental breakdown and is back for revenge. Can the team find out who took Hotch in time to save him?
Criminal Minds - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,065 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 9/3/2009 - Published: 8/6/2009 - A. Hotchner/Hotch, S. Reid
Frogs and Fires by EliSmith reviews
Just a crazy one shot. REVIEW and tell me what you think.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,642 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 1 - Published: 9/3/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Red Rising by tromana reviews
The smiley on the wall was Red John’s gift to the world, and an apology. Implied Jane/Lisbon. Jello-Forever September Challenge not-entry. Theme: smile.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Crime - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,472 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/3/2009 - Red John - Complete
Colours of the Rainbow by tromana reviews
7 unrelated Jane/Lisbon fanfics, each one based on a colour of the rainbow. Fantasy Script Forum challenge. Last: Roses are Red, Violets are Blue: Inanimate objects can’t stare, Lisbon.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 11,987 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 8/30/2009 - Published: 7/16/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Scarlet Threads by SpaceAnJL reviews
*New ficlet* Today, my brain is all made up of random. And this is what happens when that is the case...
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 41 - Words: 32,698 - Reviews: 520 - Favs: 94 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 8/26/2009 - Published: 6/19/2009
The Secret Life of Cho by iloveethementalisttt reviews
mkay. if youve read my stories before, you should have seen this one coming. so you ask yourself: What does Kim Ball Cho do when he gets home from work? Here is your answer, my friends. Song is Eye of the Tigerr :
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 739 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 9 - Published: 8/21/2009 - Kimball C. - Complete
Cho The Mentalist by EliSmith reviews
During an unexpected thunderstorm, Jane and Cho are electrocuted, which results in them switching bodies. Some secrets are revealed about both characters as they try to solve a not so hard case. All fun...
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,780 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 8/21/2009 - Published: 8/18/2009 - Kimball C., Patrick J.
Sneaky woman by Sexysaxist reviews
Van Pelt and Lisbon gang up on Jane and rattle his confidence. Silly, with slight Van Rigsby. one shot- complete. mild language.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 913 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 10 - Published: 8/21/2009 - Grace vP. - Complete
The Gypsy's Prophecy by Power of the Pen12 reviews
A gypsy at a carnival predicts Holly's capture and torture. Artemis, terrified for his friend, takes Holly across Ireland, trying desperately to protect her. But danger follows them wherever they go. A/H, rated for torture in later chapters. FINISHED.
Artemis Fowl - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 36,636 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 43 - Updated: 8/13/2009 - Published: 12/29/2008 - Artemis F., Holly S. - Complete
Vampires, Mutants and Red Smiley Faces by 221b Baker Street reviews
Written before Blood Red Moon. Three CBI agents have too much time on their hands, and entirely too much imagination. A One-Off for my kids.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,297 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 41 - Published: 8/13/2009 - Complete
Elevator Trauma by dizzy - in - the - izzy reviews
McGee has a problem with riding the elevator, so Gibbs sets out to figure out why the younger agent is suddenly taking the stairs. Slight Tiva at the end. For Zatl!
NCIS - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,276 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/11/2009 - Complete
Still Seeing Red by 221b Baker Street reviews
Set 1 week after Bloodshot, psychic Kristina Frye has gone missing, Jane is beginning to act more oddly than usual, and the team must cross the entire state of California to find a killer who seems to be targeting psychics. Dedicated to Purple Piggie.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 12 - Words: 27,906 - Reviews: 207 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 8/7/2009 - Published: 6/23/2009
Echoes by tromana reviews
A case gone wrong, and Lisbon remembers. Jane/Lisbon Written for the jello-forever August '09 challenge. Theme: Mistakes.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,957 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/4/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Confessions by Penelope Louise reviews
It is Valentine's Day, and Lisbon receives three mystery presents. The first and second aren't so hard to decode. But the third? Cryptic... Will Lisbon solve its mystery, and what will that mean? Jisbon, VanRigsby
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/1/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Baby in Red by Chloe Winchester reviews
Someone actually understands Patrick. She finds him funny and interesting and they get along so well it's like they're the same person. And She's a fifteen year old girl. Please R&R My first shot at this so be nice!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 13,871 - Reviews: 63 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 27 - Updated: 7/31/2009 - Published: 6/8/2009 - Patrick J. - Complete
Don't Ask Me by ProjectManhattan reviews
Shawn and Gus decide to take a vacation to Miami under Shawn's somewhat suspect motive of saving Lassiter from an assassin. While in the sunny Florida town, however, our pseudo-detectives run afoul of some very colorful characters. Burn Notice crossover.
Crossover - Psych & Burn Notice - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 11,017 - Reviews: 125 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 164 - Updated: 7/15/2009 - Published: 3/15/2009 - Shawn S.
Test of Trust by music-and-fairytales reviews
Lisbon. I want you to know that you can trust me. No matter what happens, I will be there for you." When Lisbon's drink is spiked at a bar, she remembers Jane's words and calls him for help. Jisbon friendship mostly, but romance if you squint.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,333 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 62 - Follows: 13 - Published: 7/15/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
The Tipping Point by waterbaby134 reviews
Sequel to "Justice Served" but can be read as standalone. Jane's thoughts about finally getting Red John and where his life is going from here. Oneshot.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,937 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/9/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Coffee And Bondage by shadow243ali reviews
“You know your face does the cutest thing when you moan ‘Oh Patrick’.” Jisbon oneshot.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,082 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/2/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Blood Red Moon by 221b Baker Street reviews
Jane and the team are called in to investigate a series of blood-less murders in San Francisco, home to cable cars, the Golden Gate Bridge, and the highest 'vampire' population in California. Dedicated to Elodie Wolfe!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 11 - Words: 27,439 - Reviews: 159 - Favs: 66 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 6/12/2009 - Published: 5/4/2009
Red Hiding by Danicakate reviews
In a training excercise, Jane is hiding. But when something goes wrong, will his perfect hiding spot be his final one? My first Mentalist Fanfic, please read and review!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Suspense - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,718 - Reviews: 74 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 6/11/2009 - Published: 5/13/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Red, White & Who by SpaceAnJL reviews
*Complete* Sexy. Damaged. Brilliant. Erratic. And there's two of them.
Crossover - Doctor Who & Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Mystery - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,541 - Reviews: 122 - Favs: 188 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 6/1/2009 - Published: 5/23/2009 - 10th Doctor, Patrick J. - Complete
Workday Commotions by OnlySoAnHour reviews
The team discovers AIM... T for language in the later chapters.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,141 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 5/25/2009 - Published: 5/21/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Of Bullseyes and Bloody Betrayals by 221b Baker Street reviews
Set one week after Red John's Footsteps. Jane has 20 minutes to kill, and killing is very much on his mind. A one-off.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,489 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/21/2009 - Complete
Hokey Pokey by lil smiles reviews
"Lisbon, focus, I know you're picturing me naked, but try to focus." Jello-Jane/Lisbon friendship. ONESHOT.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,103 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 56 - Follows: 6 - Published: 5/19/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Bad Seeds by lorcan reviews
In which our CBI team must find enough evidence to arrest a serial killer - even if she's only in the first grade. COMPLETE.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 18,735 - Reviews: 96 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 5/18/2009 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Complete
Trust by flyersgirl12 reviews
my first attempt at Mentalist fiction. Lisbon has trust issues with Jane but will she trust him to help her after she gets hurt. rated for violence
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 12 - Words: 16,558 - Reviews: 105 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 71 - Updated: 5/10/2009 - Published: 4/7/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Red Hot Guilt by PhantomKnight88 reviews
Lisbon is haunted by the memory of a man she killed when her team is assigned a new consultant. Will he be the solution to all her problems or just make them worse?
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,507 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 5/9/2009 - Published: 4/2/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Childish Capers by Ebony10 reviews
Jane gets surprised- for once!- and has some realizations concerning his dark-haired boss.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 7 - Words: 9,478 - Reviews: 176 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 5/8/2009 - Published: 4/29/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Pita by Ebony10 reviews
A short oneshot about the birthday present Jane got Lisbon. Spoiler.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 832 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 5 - Published: 5/1/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Illstarred Trips by bulletproofweeks reviews
The CBI team has an assignment in a remote town in northern California, but they find that the real challenge is getting there. What happens when Jane and Lisbon are forced to share a hotel room? Jisbon, Permanently Discontinued
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 23,119 - Reviews: 354 - Favs: 146 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 4/29/2009 - Published: 2/28/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Blue Lights by redfeatherz reviews
Jane's erratic speeding catches up with him, in the form of flashing lights in his rearview mirror. Lisbon isn't impressed... or is she? The poor officer doesn't know what hit him... oneshot. Squintable Jisbon.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,416 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 4 - Published: 4/23/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Till The Death by XgreeneyedelfX reviews
What if Red John made a surprise visit to Patrick Jane's house. Does he was to kill Jane? or does he want to torment him. Will get a little gory, not for the weak stomached. a couple of deaths but i am not saying anymore.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Crime - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,379 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 4/13/2009 - Published: 4/10/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Friday's at 4pm by Aliasfan266 reviews
AU. When Patrick Jane starts to have trouble sleeping, his co-workers encourage him to see a doctor. Jane isn't happy... Until he realises his Psychologist is none other than Dr Teresa Lisbon.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,176 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 14 - Published: 3/21/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J.
Red Tables Turning by 221b Baker Street reviews
My first fanfic. Criminal Minds/Mentalist crossover. 3 guests from the BAU visit, shortly after 'Red John's Friends'. I've taken some license, but I guarantee you'll never look at the smiley face the same way again.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,938 - Reviews: 71 - Favs: 107 - Follows: 11 - Published: 2/19/2009 - Complete
Red Jane by Nightblade888 reviews
Rated M for gore and violence. He was never in danger of being caught, and they, never in any danger of finding him. Until now. Red John; his reasons, his story, his life, and his end. One Shot
Mentalist - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,635 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 8 - Published: 12/24/2008 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

A Kiss Is Just A Kiss reviews
Jane/Hightower. Hightower has a little chat with Jane about that little incident at the end of Pink Chanel Suit.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 435 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/7/2010 - Patrick J. - Complete
The Choice reviews
Red John has Jane cornered with a most unlikely weapon: a choice. Is there a middle ground, or will blood be inevitably spilled?
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Drama/Horror - Chapters: 6 - Words: 5,554 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 8/26/2010 - Published: 12/26/2009 - Patrick J.
Red Feathered Lure reviews
Jane tries a new tactic for drawing out Red John. But will he himself be sucked in? Collaboration Fic Between T.GLover and Habeous Corpus.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,721 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 5/15/2010 - Published: 3/13/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L.
Things Go Bump reviews
Sequel to Ruby Sights. The Special Crimes Unit is back, on an other-worldly plane. But, this time around, they have a little help from the people who filled their shoes. Together, they set out for Red John. Will they succeed, or will he get away again?
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Crime - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,906 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 3/19/2010 - Published: 8/10/2009
Too Many Cooks reviews
Jane, Gus and Shawn team up to solve a murder. And get into a whole lot of trouble while doing it!
Crossover - Psych & Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Humor/Crime - Chapters: 8 - Words: 5,415 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 3/14/2010 - Published: 7/24/2009 - Shawn S., Patrick J. - Complete
Music Through the Years reviews
Prompt: Love Songs. Music's meaning can change dramatically through the years. For Mosie and Tromana, two of my favorite authors.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 924 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/9/2010 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Sweet Dreams reviews
A proposition is proposed. What will be the decision?
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Horror/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 687 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 12/21/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Three Glasses reviews
A Christmas toast, saddened by loss.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 169 - Reviews: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 11/30/2009 - Patrick J. - Complete
Not My Cup of Tea reviews
Maybe Jane doesn't hate Minelli as much as he is rumored to.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 571 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/15/2009 - Patrick J. - Complete
Mon Amour reviews
Jane/Lisbon. Lisbon compares past relationships with present ones.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 441 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 10/22/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
Curved Line reviews
My entry to the Jello-forever challenge. Sometimes a curved line can say all you need it too. Jisbon.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 754 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 9/17/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Unexpected Changes reviews
Jisbon story. A few changes are made at the CBI... Alas, it sucks. the summary, not the story.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,035 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 9/7/2009 - Published: 7/23/2009 - Teresa L., Patrick J. - Complete
The Two Faces of Jane reviews
Patrick Jane has conflicting emotions about his boss. Jisbon if you squint.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Poetry/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 165 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Published: 8/15/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Memory Palace reviews
This story explains the "long story" of Jane's past in the carnival. Btw, there will be no Jace except in Chapter 4. Thanks!
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 6 - Words: 4,612 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 8/9/2009 - Published: 6/5/2009 - Complete
The Edge reviews
Disaster strikes during a routine CBI operation. Jisbon. Posted for the August challenge.
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 733 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 8/7/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
I Shall Call You Thing! reviews
How exactly did the Cat in The Hat team up with the Things? This story explains it.
Seussical - Rated: T - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,395 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 7/31/2009 - Published: 7/27/2009
Ruby Sights reviews
The clock is ticking as the CBI Agents try to catch Red John and save themselves. But as they say, the best laid plans...
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Tragedy - Chapters: 11 - Words: 13,203 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 7/25/2009 - Published: 5/19/2009 - Complete
The Fifteenth of September reviews
It's Jane's birthday, and the team celebrates. Crappy summary, decent story.
Mentalist - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 898 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/9/2009 - Complete
Red Reversals reviews
Who is good and who is bad? Warning: Not for easily scared. :
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Horror/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 752 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/19/2009 - Complete
Mauve Secrets reviews
Rated t just in case. The CBI has suspicions that Jane might be dirty. slight Jisbon, maybe.
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Suspense - Chapters: 9 - Words: 7,790 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 4/18/2009 - Published: 4/5/2009 - Complete
Woman Versus Machine reviews
Sequel to Man versus Machine. the reason why it's separate is because it was written as a romance. Jane retakes the course with Lisbon as his subject, and some things come up... Rated t just in case!
Mentalist - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,125 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Patrick J., Teresa L. - Complete
Protecting the President reviews
Training exercise for the team! Alas, my summaries suck. This is a one-shot.
NCIS - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 510 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/16/2009 - Complete
Man Versus Machine reviews
Short oneshot. What happens when Jane matches wits with a lie detector?
Mentalist - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,193 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 5 - Published: 4/13/2009 - Patrick J. - Complete