Naturally my profile pic is the epically awesome Kenpachi Zaraki - bridging the divide between pirate and ninja. I want to be him when I grow up.

If I grow up.

Name: I have a few. Let's just say Felix for now. There's a story behind the pen name, but I'm not going to tell you. Well, maybe if you're nice.

Age: Old enough to drink anywhere, and that's all that matters to me.

Gender: Guess.

In the interest of telling you a bit about myself, I'm sharing three quotes that I think sum me up -

"Downhill - it's how I roll." - vicioux.

"Endurance is nobler than strength, and patience than beauty." - John Ruskin.

"If only it were so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?" - Alexander Solzhenitsyn.

So essentially I'm just a massive Bleach fan and have decided, seeing as most of my favourite pairings are crack and therefore don't get enough love, that I will write my own. I'm usually a script writer, so this will be a bit of a change of pace (and style and theme and bloody everything) for me. Constructive reviews will be much appreciated though if you really, desperately want to flame just make sure that you have a valid reason and that you spell and punctuate correctly, otherwise I will open fire with a barrel o' mockery.

Which is considerably less fun than a barrel o' monkeys, I can assure you.

For the record, I'm all about the Grimm/Soi, Ulqui/Nel and Nemu/Jyuu (God, that sounds hilarious when I say it aloud. I don't even think that pairing has a name, but I like this one). Furthermore, unless the description says otherwise, my stories are all part of the post-war universe I have devised and are a series, of sorts.

Despite my recent silence, I am still putting stuff together, some of which I hope to send your way very soon. I've gotten a lot of mail and such while I was away, so I figure I'll answer all of your questions at once:

1) Offers to translate or promote my work elsewhere are eagerly accepted, provided credit is given and you send me links. Seriously, that would be awesome, and thanks to those who have already offered.

2) The reading and chronological order of my work for my non-AU stuff goes like so -

AWOL

Oceans Apart

Call You By A Different Name

Five Shinigami Walk Into A Bar

Sink Into Me

Chrysalis

... And then it gets complicated. Boy Meets Girl happens halfway through Chrysalis, The Deep Breath and the Plunge starts after Sink Into Me and is still going on, and Guess Who's Coming to Dinner is just insane.

Really.

Your safest bet is to read them in the order I wrote them, but I still make no guarantees that you'll get sense out of them; getting sense out of me is challenging at the best of times. The two AU stories are part of something else I'm working on, but can stand alone as well, so read them however you choose.

3) Currently, I plan to write an IchiRuki within my AU setting and am starting a Nemu/Jyuu AU (say that aloud) that's a whole other ball game. That being said, I have no intention of bailing on my Stark/Yachiru - that particular piece of crack-tastic delight is getting written, so help me!

4) Thank you for all the lovely reviews. Seriously, they never fail to brighten my day. When I started this four years ago I had no idea if what I was doing would ever be read, let alone well received, so thank you to all my wonderfully enthusiastic readers. I can only hope to reward your patience properly.

Anyway, all this craziness aside, read and enjoy!