They killed my Ianto. My beautiful Welshman.
They shall never be forgiven.
Unless they bring him back.
Until then I will continue to write letters to the BBC daily.
Therefore having no time to study and failing at life.
End of dreams about having a proper job.
To the BBC, it's all your fault that I am now destined to forever live on the dole and have no future.
Okay. Torchwood rant over for the moment...
On with the show...
So this is me! My name is Keyna I'm 19, from Australia, and yes I am a little bit Welsh. Probably too much for any healthy human beings. So I'm deeply sorry if some of the crazy slips out. I try to keep in in its cage, but it's just so cute, sitting there with its big brown eyes, that sometimes I have to let it out for a bit of a frolic.
DWF here. You may know me from such bio pages as wiltingflowersandpinkribbons. . .and my own, of course.
Ok so I just have to say that this is really surreal. Like in the dripping clocks sense of the word. Not in the drunk air hostess leaning over the aeroplane bathroom toilet. (That would only be truly surreal if there was a canary yellow hippo making toast with marmalade in the corner asking her "How MUCH did you have to drink last night?)
What's surreal about a drunk air hostess?
Actually thinking back on that, the toilet would have to reply something like: "Oh TRUST ME! You really don't want to know!" for the situation to be truly surreal. Other wise, it's just stupid.
I have a slightly obsessive nature. No ok, I'm sorry, I am the supreme ruler of the obsesive nature monarch.
SLIGHTLY obessive? Keyna, don't lie.
Right, so not really. I'm more like a distant cousin, but one that you're sure is related because they have all the family traits from ancient times. Like me and the Queen. I'm a distant cousin of the frickin QUEEN! All bow to me!
Yeah and you're related to an Aussie serial killer.
Be proud of that one!
He's actually a convict. Sent over to Aus, on the First Fleet - for the murder of 6 people. Not that he was crazy like Jack the Ripper or anything. He didn't mutilate the bodies after he was done with them - he just sort of. . .stabbed them multiple times and bolted.
I would like to explain why I am such a nutter before this gets too out of hand.
Keyna, I'm almost sure that there are normal humans in Wales. You can't keep using this excuse for yourself all the time.
Just because you think I can't doesn't mean I wont!
And hell, it's been working for me so far, why change a good thing?
Anyway back to the nut-face story...
To that I would answer my dear Sir, that is ... well, true... so then I would attempt further explanation.
My great-grandfather was in a FREAKING MENTAL ASYLUM somewhere in Glamorganshire.
So this is my line of thinking.
The whole of Wales is a bit of an asylum, so for him to be declared actually mentally insane, insane enough to be put into an asylum in Wales, he must have been licking windows (I don't recommend it, they're not the nicest tasking things in the known universe), climbing into piano's, trying to swim underwater, eating pears... you know crazy stuff...well that my theory anyway... it might need some work, I still think it would pass in a court of law. All those who know me, realise that this mingt be tested in such a court sooner rather than later.
Well. . .wales. . .assylum. . .I guess it makes sense. Whoever thought up the Welsh language was nuts. . .and anyone who can speak and understand it is even loopier. Myself included.
Torchwood and Dr Who are my life at the moment. Just thought I would put it out there. I'm in love with Ianto oh and Ballet boys in ninja undies, but that's a story for another time.
It is really sad. Both of us sit there and talk about it continually. I sometimes think it's the basis for our friendship. Which is really awful. But then I remember the canary yellow hippo conversations. . .and I realise that the reason we're friends is because we're both welsh idiots.
My imagination is slightly overactive, but difficult to put on paper.
Overactive? Hahahahahahaha! NEVER FEAR! VOLDEMORT IS HERE!!
NOOOO!! It was "HAVE NO FEAR!" ...Slightly more dramatic. Oh. . .whatever.
James Masters was in my closet. I think he was looking at my shoes. I have a lot of shoes.
My life loves are shoes, reading, bass, music, reading, sleeping, crazy dancing, peanut butter and olive sandwiches, drama, shoes, Torchwood, David Tennant, Dr who, shoes, John Barrowman, Ianto Jones, Janto, Gareth David-Lloyd, Laurrel K. Hamilton, Vampire ficton, Monty python, Burn Gorman, John Cleese, Eve Myles, Naoko Mori, Buffy, shoes, Billie Piper, Cathrerine Tate, Freema Agyeman, my friends, J.D. Robb, chocolate, Torchwood, shoes, David Tennant, James Masters, Bryce Cortney, double bass, pie, my dogs, shoes, interlectual converstaions, frozen chicken sex dabates, French, music, travel, and Iven.
And Drag queens. I absolutely love them. To the point where DWF is making me go as Miss Zsa Zsa from La Cage to a costume party.
I'm sure there are more but I can't seem to think of any at the moment. Girls, Help me out here!
My Friends on the site are:
And as most of them know my password, I dare say you will hear from one or two of them in my profile. Girls, you know who you are!
When I speak of The Girls, I usually mean WFPR and DWF, but I could mean an entirely different kettle of fish.
Who the hell keeps fish in a kettle?
. . .I do!
No you don't!
You put them in bedsheets just like every other good little Welshman.
So I'm back.
I should probably be doing an assignment right now but for some strange reason, I feel that this is going to be slightly more entertaining.
I just thought I should let everyone know that if someone falls down in the middle of the street and is sitting in the gutter, don't laugh from your car.
WE CAN SEE YOU!!
I mean, the person lying in the gutter can see you.
I never fall down.
In the last 10 minutes.
I just came to a realization. . .
Well. . .
No, I didn't actually. I just wanted something to write.
So, you may have noticed that neither this mental one here, nor I has bothered penning any stories.
That's because we're really lazy.
Although I helped co-write wiltingflowers's 'Cures' series.
. . .and, I have written countless stories during Legal Studies and Maths. But I can't be bothered typing them.
And. . .Keyna? . . .I don't even know. But I should assume that her mind is too full of other weird and wonderful things. . .Pineapple Fritters. . .Peanut Butter and Olive Sandwhiches. . .John Barrowman. . .David Tennant. . .David Tennant. . .David Tennant. . . .
. . .eh.
I'm disappointed Von.
You missed shampoo,
And other stuff...
Like getting a proper job.
...If anything has EVER scared me it's the thought of me in a proper job.
Which I now have.
I work in an educational instrumental music store. Anyone want a trumpet?