Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.
Hey, my name is Jaimie, thanks for reading my profile, and please check out my story below.
I blame my friends for my addiction XD
Stuff about me :D
Hmmm, well, I'm 17 years old and I live in the fab city of Liverpool, England. Updates might be slow as I'm more focused on exams and getting through school, and into Uni, so if you do read my stories, bear with me, the chapters will come :)
I have a few friends who are on this site, and some more outside of fanfiction who love Twilight just as much as I do.
Here is one of my friends, Kiwi02, check out some of her stories, and her profile is one of the longest you'll ever see.
Things I love
-The Twilight Saga, books and films
-My Friends and family
-Animals (except spiders, I'm terrified of them!)
-Taylor Lautner (sorry RPattz fans, but you can't deny it)
-Paramore (Saw them last Nov, can't believe they've split!)
-Dominos Pizza and chocolate (mmm...)
-My phone and my laptop :)
Things I hate
-School and exams
hmm, I don't hate much do I?
Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916
Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843
Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901
Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916
Edward Cullen: Hotter and Spicier Than You since 1901
Bella Swan: Luckier than you since 1987
I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
Whenever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlie's sake of course
And I promise to remember Jacob
Whenever my hear fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
Whenever I am in the emergency room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to remember Rose
Whenever I see something that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful bronze hair
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know!
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods:
1. On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(Shoot, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
2. On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special)?
3. On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(But, it's "just" a suggestion).
4. On Tosco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!
5. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought??...)
6. On packaging for a Rowena iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(But wouldn't this save me more time)?
7. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
8. On Tylenol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(And...I'm taking this because??...)
9. On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(As opposed to...what)?
10. On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious)
11. On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(Talk about a news flash)
12. On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
13. On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
14. On a Korean kitchen knife-- "Warning: keep out of children."
(Hmm...Something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my ...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)