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Poll: How should I handle the next update(s) of Total Drama World Tour Rewrite? And yes, this poll being here does imply that TDWTR may be back in the near future. Vote Now!
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Joined 04-11-09, id: 1897388, Profile Updated: 09-13-15
Author has written 13 stories for Ed, Edd n Eddy, Total Drama series, Hellsing, Homestuck, Amazing World of Gumball, X-overs, Misc. Cartoons, Steven Universe, and Big Bang Theory.

Good afternoon.

Let me start this out by saying that I do not do drugs. Many of my ideas just come from... well, they're usually inspired by something. My later stories less so. But most of the time I go through with them because I don't find anything else like the concept anywhere in the fanbase, and if I do it's usually either hiatus'ed before it really takes off or... not... exactly... satisfactory. And the reason why there's so many Homestuck fanworks and fanwork ideas I have is because of how the fanbase seems to... well, how many John Vs Dave stories are there? Polygamy stories that group more than the B2 kids? John/Jade fics that use Zelda settings?

I have written some info on my TV Tropes and Wikipedia pages. Original fiction will be at my Fictionpress right here. This page is going to be for my fan fiction stuff, while I plan on remaking the other two to be more of a typical user page. I have (mostly) already done this with my TV Tropes page. But those two pages aren't completely useless! I have two "Unpublished Works" pages for my fan fics on TV Tropes and a trope page for TZP, and I do have a tiny bit of (very spoilery, but it's mostly SBIG and stuff) information on my Wikipedia sandbox.

My Tumblr page, which is currently primarly about my fanworks, can be found here. Be foreward in that, as of the ending of Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals's part of the Great Typo Cleanup, there will be uncovered butts of either gender on that.

Quick note: There seems to be a glitch where viewing this profile under the "permanent name" url will underline everything after the first bullet list. I think this happens with all bullet lists. Or bullet lists with links in them. Edit, this glitch seems to be happening right now even under the temporary name. But it's not in the source when I edit it. Huh.

Speaking of plural pages: Quick links to TV Tropes pages (in order of the fic's creation date):

  • General SBIG (Also has trope lists for Eds' EDventure, Zombie Attack!, Shelding and Lenard Tock About Fysicks, Kids Fit the Trolls, Gumball Vs Satan, and SBIGlets)
  • Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals (Currently includes tropes and such from Hecksing: The Dawn)
  • Total Zeksmit Plains (And the rest of the series, for future seasons)
  • Sweet Jade and Hella John
  • Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals
  • 496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems (Can't externally link this one for some reason (link length? Target length?); it's here: )
  • Carl Stevens Universe
  • HUC, SJAHJ, CSU, and TZ also have their own character sheets. HHC will too VERY SOON. It probably always has by the time you're reading this, in fact.

    I accept criticism as long as the points brought up make sense. Mindless bashing I don't like. Although, if you do bring up something you don't like, chances are I'm well aware of that flaw but never actually get to working on it. (TZP fails with Bridgette and Gwen's characters, can't really find its genre quite yet, and Ezekiel's character seems to fluctuate between calm, planned host and terrible ameatur, for example, and that's of one of my favorite fan fics.) I also plan on critiquing other fan fics through reviews. Mostly ones with glaring flaws.

    I used to mainly go through the Total Drama fandom and look around for competitions. Except app stories, yet I'm trying to get into them. Now I just browse around for anything in the event that I may find a story with a premise that catches me in. So far I haven't found too much luck, but it might be because I'm a pretty picky reader.

    I don't review often, but I will respond to almost any review to me. Here's a guide:

    - The comments to the review will be at the bottom of the most recent chapter (even if the review is directed at an earlier chapter), between the footnotes and the closing AN.
    - I will not comment on redundant reviews, even if they are written by different people.
    - Bewarned that I could go off topic on my comment, so don't expect a direct response.

    This profile is still under construction. One reason being is that I plan on adding sections for every fan fic series I'm working on.

    Note to Total Drama writers: (Or maybe, but I hope it doesn't come to this, writers of other fandoms) if you're thinking about making your first competition one where other people submitts their characters, you might want to think again. Not only are these against the site rules (I think), but half of them never go anywhere and I believe that you should practace trying to characterize either canon characters or your own OCs before taking on this concept. I'm not saying I completely discourage the idea, but the sheer ammount of these plus the general quality of most of them (several of them never even get enough apps. Take that as a warning sign) makes me want to put a warning like this out there.

    Profile as of 9/13/2,015 (If the "profile updated" says otherwise, it probably just means that I only made a quick update. Quick enough for me to forget about this.)

    For future reference, I just want to get out of the way that nothing I write is a reference to Puella Magi Madoka Magica or Neon Genesis Evangelion. And maybe a bunch of other stuff that I get the impression people on the internet think everything is about. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic I guess? Except HHC HAS talked about it by-name, if to parody the vocal minority who kind of think that it's a goldmine of porn potential for some reason. (PS like half of HHC's jokes, including everything to do with Roxy becides her Sis stuff, are parodies of the vocal minority who think that Homestuck it a goldmine of porn potential for some reason, so don't think that I'm only picking on fanbases I'm not a part of.)

    FAVORITE works of fiction (In order to gaining interest): Mario series, Pikmin series, Total Drama, Homestuck, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. (I don't know so much about Homestuck anymore, I think its slightly starting to go downhill.) Things I only have a mild interest in (or just really like, but this list is what I REALLY like) aren't here, but instead on...

    Other things I like (In no real order): [Will complete] Sonic games (though I have not really gotten any of the recent games; not that I believe in the negative reviews or anything, it's just that I've never been that interested in getting them), Ed, Edd n Eddy, Adventure Time, recently taking up interest in Steven Universe (And I'm making this my "failsafe next fandom" in case Homestuck's ending flops and I lose interest in the HS fan fic ideas that I never got to write (I already did with Total Drama, with TDWTR, TZ, Total Drama Race, and maybe the Rewrite Trilogy being the only things I still consider now), because again I am losing interest in that at supersonic rates. My dissapointment could shatter windows), Gravity Falls, and Clarence (I ended up liking this a little more than I thought I would, and I just flipped to this via Video on Demand because there was nothing else to watch and... well).

    "I'll get to trying this out" list: Phineas and Ferb, I guess just about almost everything that's been mentioned in SBIG except for the stuff like Halo and Ren and Stimpy.

    "Get that thing away from my face!" list: Modern Simpsons (I have very, very rarely laughed at the entire show's - regardless of season - humor. However, the older episodes used to have heartwarming and interesting moments that I really liked. Now though, they've dropped the more human aspects of the show in favor of being "wacky" and "recent" with the only real attempts at being emotional being Homer and Marge reconciling for the umpteenth time, and as a result I think the whole show just became an earsore.)

    Fan Fiction Stats:

    Published/Working on: ("Top priority" means it's currently the project I'm focusing most on.)

  • The Eds' EDventure [COMPLETED] -- Part of the "SBIG" (Pronounced... well, "Sbig." As one word.) series. Random parody thing. Eds Vs Kids.
  • * Intermissions/"SBIGtermissions" [WRITING ON HIATUS (A)] -- Kids from Homestuck (mainly John and Jade) screwing around, part of the SBIG series. Getting stranded on islands, robing banks, fighting characters from a live-action sitcom, watching Ed, Edd n Eddy; that kind of stuff. Two of them will be within the above work, there might be a third one hidden within a secret work. Chronologically the idea was between TZ series and SJAHJ, but that doesn't really matter much since these are organized by publish date.
  • Zombie Attack! [COMPLETED] -- Part of the "SBIG" series. Edd from EENE versus zombies. Originally a 'short' story as part of a TV Tropes thing. Also contains the second SBIGtermission, if I DO the intermissions. NOTE: The original story was deleted (as part of the entire badfic TV Tropes thread it was on) and, unless there's some archive site I'm not really aware of, it's not around for actual viewing. However, a while ago I saved up both the original text (TVT formatting and all), and put it on my user page on the fanfiction wiki. (It was going to be on its own page, but I chickened out.) I do plan on posting a remake of this as its own short story. This will probably be around the time I finally put TEE off hiatus. Remake thing aside, there's another, more spoilery reason as to why this is given a questionmark after the "COMPLETED." Anyway, the fic can be viewed here.
  • Total Drama World Tour Rewrite ["On hiatus" (A)/REMADE] -- As the name implies, a fix fic of Total Drama's third season with Ezekiel as the villain and a Harold-centric harem.
  • Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals [COMPLETED] -- A bad fic/parody of the Hellsing OVAs, part of the SBIG series. It starts off with the exact same plot as canon but then things get... weird. Has a spinoff Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals, see below, and pseudo-sequel Carl Stevens Universe, also see below.
  • Total Zeksmit Plains [IN PROGRESS] -- Details about the fan fic and the related series posted below.
  • Sweet Jade and Hella John [COMPLETED] -- Surreal parody thing inspired by Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff and Problem Sleuth. Part of the SBIG series. Basically the spiritual successor to Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. Offsite, thread is here and the mirror is here.
  • Onionstuck [ON HIATUS (A)] -- Pikmin SBURB session. I'll try to stay true to Pikmin's themes here, and the focus will really be more on the Pikmin themselves than on the session. Offsite, thread is here and the mirror is here.
  • Movie Day [IN PROGRESS... barely] -- This is an Ed, Edd n Eddy fan fic about the kids trying to cross a long distance in order to get to a hot vacation spot, but before a highly-hyped movie premiers there (and only there, until after several weeks) and they end up missing it. This was originally supposed to be my first "serious" fic after writing several SBIG installments, although that has since changed. It is, however, my first "adventure" fan fic, which will pave the road for others. (See below.)
  • Sheldin And Lenard Tock About Fysicks [ON HIATUS] -- Comedic Big Bang Theory comic, part of the SBIG series.
  • Kids Fit the Trolls [COMPLETED] -- Homestuck short story that's also part of the SBIG series. Originally this was just the Kids Fit series, with the sequel possibly titled Kids Fit Post Scratch with two more titled Kids Fit the More Trolls and Kids Fit the Cals. However, I'm thinking of just "merging" the three opposing groups together in one slightly bigger story called Act 5 Vs Act 6, since otherwise it would be a little too formuletic for my tastes.
  • Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals [COMPLETED] -- Part of the SBIG series and takes place in the same universe as Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. Shows the series from the Homestuck character's point of view, which reveals a lot of stuff unseen in HUC, mainly because I haven't planned HHC when I was writing any of HUC. It explains stuff such as what happened to Dracula and why the hell John and Jade were in the jury in chapter 9 even though it's in a completely different country, but a lot of this doesn't come until much later in the fan fic. While the overall plot is about the kids and trolls fighting the Felt, several chapters will focus on the side world because I didn't really like how "Hecksing Vs Millennium" took up the entire plot in HUC.
  • 496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems [PAIRINGS 2-7 GETTING REVISED: 1 AND PROLOGUE REDONE 1/19 AND 1/18 RESPECTIVELY] -- Homestuck fan fic where the eight humans and twenty-four trolls are stuck on a six year trip (not that exact amount, but I'll get to that) across the furthest ring because of some obnoxious "tag-along" troll ("Bororo Sierda" -- each word being a corruption of "bull" and "shit," but lengthed to fit the 6/6 naming and with the first letters changed to be the initials of bullshit.) mucking up the A1 session and screwing things up from there. Plus Meenah getting a little over confident and deciding to scratch the session instead of giving anyone the chance to actually finish. The title comes from how this is actually going to be a romance fan fic, which each chapter being a short hooking up one of the four hundred and ninty six pairing combinations. And yes, the back story is supposed to be stupid. Oh, and it has dreamselves.
  • Gumball Vs Satan [COMPLETED] -- Gumball Watterson was the newest face to the SBIG series. (As of when this started.) An Amazing World of Gumball fan fic where a war breaks out because the devil, who goes by the name Omarn Scratch, has a broken ladder, and for some reason his daughter Elisa thinks that it's best to use Gumball's leg bone to fix it. Loosley inspired by Conker's Bad Fur Day.
  • Carl Stevens Universe [COMPLETED, WILL BE REMADE] -- This would have been my first one-shot, but seeing as it was even longer than 496's prologue, it got split into a twoshot where both chapters were out on the same day. It was however my first fic that directly involves another fic. In this case, it's a crossover between Steven Universe and the above Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. The surviving members of Hecksing (now renamed back into Hellsing) from the end of HUC, now portrayed a lot closer to their actual depictions, move into Beach City. However, they quickly get into a few issues with the Crystal Gems, which cumulates into a paintball game with extremely high stakes to determine which gang of heroes gets to stay in Beach City. Not part of the "SBIG" series.
  • Hecksing: The Dawn [COMPLETED] -- Part of the SBIG series, it's a prequel to HUC that, despite its title, is absolutely nothing like the original Hellsing: The Dawn other than that it started taking place in WWII and it has a younger Walter. In addition to him is Integra and (he doesn't look different this time due to how HUC/HTD's plot works) Alucard, and together they go around fighting Hitler Revival Groups. The reason why I'm focusing on them is a bit of a spoiler for HUC, but let's just say that I plan on expanding the Crconikals verse a little bit and often times these three... don't exactly get a lot of focus.
  • (360 Degree Duck came out here.)
  • The Hair Idealization [COMPLTETED, BUT LIKELY TO GET REDONE SO THAT IT'S A BIT LARGER] -- Big Bang Theory crack crossover with Perfect Hair Forever where Leonard and Penny are roped into competing with Gerald and Brenda over some challenges at a stadium. My first definitive oneshot, unless you count Zombie Attack!
  • run:gifocalypse [HAVEN'T STARTED AS OF THIS WRITING, PLAN TO START BEFORE THE END OF THE DAY] -- Gravity Falls fan fic centered on .GIFfany, after being brought back through a strange and unknown method, finding various other copies of her game and using them to try to take over the whole world in some bizarre revenge plan. Might have about 15 chapters total.
  • Bloodswap: Guess Whose Getting a Spinoff? [WORKING DAILY, ROUGHS OF FIRST TWO CHAPTERS DONE] -- Homestuck fan fic basically starring the Nepeta swaps from Sweet Jade and Hella John, except in a fic that's not intentionally badly done and more serious at that. They're playing Sgrub. Saying anything more will be giving off a whole lot of spoilers, so I'll say this: It's not a doomed timeline. There won't be a 'twist' that amounts to "For a story with an actual ending, check out canon."
  • Simpsons Meet Brandy and Mr. Whiskers [WORKING...ISH] -- A remake of one of the first story ideas I had, when I was around seven or eight. Based on when I thought the Simpsons crashed in the Amazon at the end of "Blame it on Lisa," I had written what they met with Brandy and Mr. Whiskers and then... well, things quickly took a turn for the strange. If anything it was even stranger in the original plan then it will be in this redo, because the remake will be eliminating one crossover (it's a very embarassing crossover that will be covered in the final closing notes in the story proper; that's saying a lot) and "relocating" things a bit to make more sense.
  • New Super Dale Gribble U [WRITING ON HIATUS] -- This one is an oddball that somehow made it from "little ideas" to "oh wow I'm actually doing this." One month after Hank Hill of King of the Hill fame is forced to move to another location in Texas thanks to an incident requiring Buck to move his buisiness there (I haven't decided what it is yet, but it will be elaborated upon near the beginning of the story), his house is finally taken by Felicia of Darkstalkers fame, who wanted to start an orphanage nearby. And following that, a lot more catwomen. This is admitedly a borderline rehash of Carl Stevens Universe plot-wise (unfitting crossover character moves into another series where they're disliked), but there's some twists added. One: The majority of the story is focused on Dale, Bill, and Boomhauer (maybe Khan too as a "replacement" fourth member, why not?) screwing around without Hank there to bail them out (the naming is a nod to this; after New Super Luigi U, which axes the "Bros" thanks to Mario's absense, except Luigi is way more capable of getting things done on his own than the alley guys), and there's a bit where they're reacting to all the naked people moving in. Two: Dale follows a really, really bad idea in making contact with a certain hood-wearing Darkhunter early on. Three: There is no paintball, and the ending's different. Four: Joseph is a colossal pervert. I'm a bit nervous with this since it's, IIRC and if this is done before a currently-I-don't-have idea that fills this, the first non-SBIG story detailing a work of fiction I haven't exactly played. I'll do my best in research (it helps that only two fighters so far are planned to be in this), see all the gameplay and read up on backstories, and try not to come across as the Darkstalker-equivillent of that guy who skipped to Act 5 of Homestuck for the trolls and does fan art of nothing but them. Although the fact that Demitri isn't in this regardless might give off those signs anyway... On an unrelated note, it occured to me days after starting this that the plot is also admitedly a borderline rehash of "New Cowboy on the Block", but I'm sure I can make it different enough.
  • Calliope's Back Story [WRITING ON HIATUS] -- I'd say it was inspired by Sonic Boom, but just in that it has appearance redesigns and a whole "new world" attempt at it. (I liked the concept of making a new world but from what I've seen of the game holy hell did Rise of Lyric do a bad job at it.) Another Homestuck one, surprise surprise, and this one's about. Hrm. How do I put this... take all 32 non-Cherub players, all of their across-scratch counterparts, make them all about adults in their 20s, and have them get stranded in a jungle near the beginning and team up with a kid Calliope. Villains include the return of the main antagonist of Kids Fight the Zombies, as well as Caliborn, obviously. The best way to sum this up would be to say that it's kind of like taking a few elements of Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals and putting them in a less badly-on-purpose light. And yes, "few elements of HHC" means fanservice confirmed.
  • Desert City [CONSIDERING ON WORKING] -- Steven Universe oneshot (hopefully this time it will be a one-shot) where, during a battle with a dimension-hopping bat creature, Steven gets sent into a parallel world. Beach City's counterpart is what this story is named after. The majority of this is about Steven looking around the rather grim world Desert City is in, and figuring out why everything is so vastly different from his world, and learn about everyone's Desert counterpart. Just a head's up: The bat thing will die shortly after Steven enters the alternate world. It's not about the Gems trying to beat it, but instead the Gems trying to restore the alternate universe and get back to their homes.
  • ...I Thought Those Were the Ingredients [CONSIDERING ON WORKING] -- Mildly long (six-eight chapters maybe) Steven Universe story about Steven setting up a five-person band called the Intervention Group against this pair of giants while Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl are nine days away from Beach City. They eventually return, but by that point things get pretty... complicated. This story heavily draws inspiration from Mario & Luigi: Dream Team, down to having dream worlds that I promise are nothing like the fake-Beach City from "Rose's Room" (the promise because of both originality (pfft what am I saying it's ripped from M&LDT) and because the Rose-Room-illusion was disturbing in general). Also this is planned to be my first non-SBIG work to look like it's connecting with my other works. So things will get kind of confusing there.
  • Total Drama Race [HAVEN'T WORKED ON IT IN A WHILE] -- Short Total Drama fan season taking place in place of World Tour, where Chris brings back the original 22 one last time and puts them into eleven teams of twelve for them to race around the world. Will start about... well, it was originally about halfway through Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, but considering how slowly I'm working on that, it's now halfway through Total Zeksmit Plains. Or... whichever comes first. See "Plans" below for specifics. Edit: By the time "The Final Five Countdown," the "halfway" mark (well 7/13, close enough), came out, I forgot about this! And then I posted "Beware of Homer," which is definitely more than halfway.
  • The Fox Crew [WORKING A LITTLE EACH DAY] -- This will take some elements from SBIG fan fics, mostly the Fox Crew from Sweet Jade and Hella John but with different members, and... I'm not exactly sure what they'll be doing, but I thought that SBIG always had some mildly descend ideas and I don't like how they're just limited to being part of something that's not meant to be taken seriously in any form of the word at all. Granted, Hank Hill leading a vigilante group is nearly impossible to take completely seriously, but here's the thing - there's nothing saying that this story has to be taken completely seriously.
  • The Hill King [I MIGHT HAVE TO RE-THINK EXACTLY WHAT I WANT THE STORY TO BE] -- King of the Hill crack fics. Hank is married to a (relitively) less violent Rip from Hellsing, and while Bobby turned out mostly the same but he's half-vampire. They do stuff, along with the other alley guys of course. Originally wasn't going to have continuity and instead be more like Total Zeksmit Side Stories or OT32 Shenanigans where the chapters could be read in any order, but... I decided to screw that.
  • In the Flesh series [WORKING ON HOMESTUCK AND KING OF THE HILL INSTALLMENTS. STARTED TOTAL DRAMA ONE] -- Pending title, but I'm likely to go with this. Basically just a challenge to write K-rated stories that also involve nudism in some way. There will at least be Homestuck and King of the Hill stories, and at least for their cases the crack-ness of the plot itself is inversely proportional to the oddity of the original fiction (the HS one being mostly normal while the KOTH one is borderline surreal). These will basically be, like, one per each fandom I already write in, so don't expect one for a fandom unless I already wrote something in it. Other possibilities, in order from more likely to least, include Steven Universe (which, as ashamed as I am to say, will involve the titular setting from Desert City above and will even be a direct sequel to it), Total Drama and hell maybe even Big Bang Theory and Ed, Edd n Eddy. (Sitting naked in a wagon may finally get a chance to be cool.) Hellsing ain't gonna be a thing unless Carl was involved somehow. The nudism won't be completely played for laughs like in SBIG, it's not played all that seriously either. And speaking of SBIG, one of my biggest reasons for making this is that SBIG kind of took a crap on nudism and I don't like that.
  • * King of the Hill -- Hank steps into an alternate dimension where clothing is only considered when the environment calls for it. With the help of alternate Dale and Hank's own counterpart, he tries to get back through an inter-dimensional portal. Then the portal frees an abomination, and things naturally go bad.
  • * Homestuck -- John, Jake, Dave, and Dirk take a vacation trip to the island (Earth is made of several tiny islands each no bigger than Austrailia in this verse; I'm not sure if there will be a reason for this) their girlfriends (try to figure it out) are on and are forced to learn nudist costumes. They picked a bad time for this, as Jade's rival, a jerk nudist surfer named Joey, sets out to ruin their relationships and tries to shut down the research center Jade works at.
  • * Total Drama -- Terror strikes Playa Des Losers (of an AU) when Izzy and Owen go around with a clothes disintegrator. They think they're the good guys. Or at least, Owen does.
  • * Steven Universe -- Very little is decided on this aside from how it will use the alternate world from Desert City again and it might bring focus back on the Crystal Gems alone, for the first time since CSU. (Since they were/will be way more joined with their counterparts in DC and ITTWTI is more about the Intervention Group.)
  • * Hellsing -- Even less is decided on this one. I just thought that the bare idea (pun unintended) would be funny.
  • Dave's Hangover [POSSIBLY NOT GONNA DO THIS] -- I feel pretty uncomfterable discussing this thanks to the beginning... well... a little Homestuck crackfic that I decided to suddenly start jotting down, Dave (aged up as with the other kid/troll characters, keep this in mind) waking up with no memory of what happened in the last three days and he's stuck in Hawaii. The uncomfterableness comes from how he's naked in bed along with the trolls (A1, A2, and A2 ancestors. I'll leave the A1 ancestors out just for once like in SJAHJ, but I may revise this later after something on them is revealed) and Hank Hill (Hank leaves early on but spoilers he's important to the plot), and they have to get from Hawaii back to Texas while figuring out what's going on (the trolls remembered the events, but Dave spent most of them away from them so he has to rely on finding other people to fill in) and being attacked by monsters. First time I'll use Aradiabot! And this may be my first M-rated story, but it's only really the beginning that bumps this up and that's nothing worse than what was shown in Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. But it isn't SBIG and these characters were originally kids so that's why it's such a gray area for me.
  • Act 5 Vs Act 6 [WORKING] -- Sequel to Kids Fit the Trolls, part of the SBIG series. The original kids and trolls find an island and get into a quick conflict with the newer kids, newer trolls, and the Cherubim. Basically the bare-bones plot is a ripoff of Sonic 3 and Knuckles, except with the usual twists I try to give these kind of stories. It will have the same "chapter"-ish formula as KFTT, where the storyline is cut into seven short chapters of varrying length.
  • The Homestuck Thanksgiving Special, except not as its "real title" is Kids Fight the Zombies [ON HIATUS UNTIL I'M DONE WITH A5VA6'S ROUGH DRAFT] -- Part of the SBIG series and a sort of "tack-on" to Act 5 Vs Act 6. Despite being planned to be out in the same post as A5VA6, this story is completely unrelated and focused on the eight humans (only one troll has any kind of appearance here and it's kind of a... "let down") fighting against zombies before things get... complicated. And weird. It will also have the same "seven short chapters" formatting KFTT and A5VA6 did. This story also has Joey, except he's not a nudist anymore, the fact that he's a parody of fan characters and his concept is Carl on steroids is more obvious, and he's called a douchebag instead of a jerk because it's this kind of story and ITFHS is that kind of story.
  • naruto the guy with the ninja [WORKING] -- Naruto SBIG story, sort of a rewrite starting from the beginning. Uh... saying anything more would really spoil a big twist near the beginning. Becides the fact that the all-lower-case-titling is intentional.
  • The Journals of Wisdom, Power, and Courage [WORKING AT FIRST BUT STOPPED] -- Gravity Falls is coming to SBIG! This installment will probably have less chapters than HHC's behemoth 26, but not by much (20 might be the total number). Um... it's mostly about Dipper, Mabel, and a life-given Journal #3 trying to foil both this weird Mabel almost-lookalike who calls herself Nzyvo, and a lot of returning villains.
  • [A "Secret" Work] [I MIGHT DROP THIS IDEA AND MAKE THE SECRET WORK SOMETHING ELSE] -- I want to, for once, say that I had something out but not say exactly what it is until after it's out. Originally, SIMPSONS would have fit under this, but decreasing interest put an end to that before I even started writing it. Then Temples, but that took too long and I really wanted to share that I had yet another ectoincest story planned. Now, however, I have this. The only hint I'll give is this: It starts with the letter "I," and I don't think I can give away any other hints without making the premise obvious if you know me, down to what fandoms are involved (yes, this in itself is a hint). Oh, and it's not SBIG.
  • OT32 Shenanigans [MIGHT DROP THIS TOO] -- Basically this is to 496 Reasons as Total Zeksmit Side Stories (see below) is to Total Zeksmit. Almost always taking place on Earth with the trolls humanized, this is a Homestuck collection of crack fics where the eight humans and twenty-four trolls are (usually) already married in a big polygamous clusterscrew and they do stuff like fighting a hydra, getting stranded on an island that turns out to be a portal to Hell, and dealing with eachother's families (whom are planned to be sneek-peeks at alter egoes present in 496, for the most part). The key difference between this and TZSS is that the stories here are kinda supposed to work more with the OT32 specifically being an OT32, and for some reason or another wouldn't be as appropriate with the TZ cast. But this and TZSS are both places to dumb off my "unused" ideas. These were originally going to be seperate one-shot stories before I thought it would be more convenient for everyone if I just lump them all together, and make an "introductory" chapter that adds a little story of the four groups of players meeting up together and later getting married and stuff.
  • Homestuck Rewrite [WORKING] -- Homestuck "remake" intended to be plagued with bad writing but not a SBIG fic. By bad writing I mean that I intend to take all of my writing flaws and exaggerate them to ungodly levels. This is mostly a parody of Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, complete with glasses-guy (John in this case) having an unwanted harem of exactly eight. (Mild spoilers: Take the A2, B1, and B2 girls. Now remove Aradia and Vriska. (If you expected me to say "Remove Jade and Jane" then you don't know me enough.) Why them? Well, Vriska just to see if I can piss people off to be honest, and Aradia... I don't remember how I came up with that, but seeing Vriska it was likely an exclusionary thing. Like "If they're part of the harem they won't die; I like killing off Aradia because I think it's funny, goodbye." It could be that the remaining troll girls, Nepeta, Kanaya, Terezi, and Feferi, were all patrons in SJAHJ/496, but... eh...) The fact that this is to be an intended parody will not be said in the fic itself until the ending so congrats, by slogging through my profile you are rewarded with this fan fic's secret before the first chapter is even out. I also plan to launch a Tumblr before I get the first chapter out so I can announce that it's a parody there too just before getting it out, and thus have an archived reference in case anyone thinks I'm making that up to try to cover the bad writing.
  • Oedipal Rhymes [EH... I KINDA STOPPED ON THAT FOR NOW, BUT I WOULDN'T SAY IT'S ON HIATUS] -- This thing arose from that How I Met Your Mother episode told completely in rhymes, and it may also turn out to be one of the primary works mocked in Homestuck Rewrite alongside... well, to give a hint, it's published and its title also ends in "Rewrite." This is a collection of six-lined Homestuck rhymes (I wouldn't call them poems, per say) detailing three-sided relationships out of a grander four-sided relationship pair, one of the Prospit guys and another of the Derse guys. It'll... make more sense when I get it out. Or just find a better way to summarize this. This is more of a short filler project if anything, and won't be that long at all.
  • Everburn [WORKING] -- My first attempt at doing an unironic mass crossover. King of the Hill centered fan fic where Bobby and many, many others have to work to saving the world after Johnny Test gets a magic gun called the Permafrost that, for a reason explained later on, turned him evil when he went into a seven-year "spiritual journey" (it's kind of like after Link pulls out the Master Sword for the first time in Ocarina of Time, except instead of a coma the person has to do a difficult series of tests). The fan fic itself is named after Permafrost's "counterpart," Everburn. Maybe the first time I (officially, I have leaked some info about it on TV Trope's sandboxes before) announced a fan fic after I actually started writing it! For once while writing this, I will not try to obsess over continuity or try to make it really serious and structured, but instead just write the storyline and see where it goes from there. Or not, because thinking about it a little I can see some very mild potential in this and I don't want it to go to waste...
  • SBIGlets [WORKING ON THE BELOW THREE STORIES, THE FIRST IS OUT - I have a lot more ideas, but I'm trying not to give them away until after at least publising one of these three] -- SBIG stories that aren't really long/complicated enough to go as their own story. While I have about a dosen ideas, the only three I am currently working on (and, as said before, willing to "completely" release) are:
  • * 5word -- Legend of Zelda story with Link splitting into five people. Ocarina of Time "remake" thing.
  • * Dream House -- Mass crossover, first fic where there isn't a real "full" story taking the lead out of crossover. Dr. House (House) loses memory of something one of his patients had, he gets help of an Dom Cobb's (Inception) new extraction team: Adam, Jamie (both Mythbusters) and Madotsuki (Yume Nikki). However, a certain monochrome phantom ends up invading the dream chain, causing a bit of a wreck...
  • * Gym Class -- Homestuck high school AU where John, Jade, Jane, and Jake quickly end up naked and half to take a long route back home. However, when the CIA gets involved, can this fearsome four take down a certain potential threat to the United States?
  • Crackcest Decathalon [STATUS VARIES BY FIC] -- A set of ten lighthearted, silly (but not deliberatly badly done) Homestuck crack fics, each of them focused around an ectobiological incest pairing with the humans. All AU, they are divided into three universes. (John/Jade and Dave/Rose in U1; John/Jane, Jade/Jake, Dave/Dirk, and Rose/Roxy in U2; John/Jake, Jade/Jane, Rose/Dirk, and Dave/Roxy in U3; Jane and Jake are not related and neither are Roxy and Dirk, if you don't believe me and think that there's going to be a post-scratch ectobiology session in the B2 session then go read Act 6 Intermission 2.)
  • * John/Jade: Temples [WORKING... sort of] -- I was keeping the title and plot a secret but then 2012 was ending so I gave it away as a New-Year's Eve special. Pseudo crossover where John and Jade go through the temples from Ocarina of Time. Say it sounds stupid, but I challenged myself to go through with this idea no matter how dumb it may seem.
  • * Rose/Dave: Attack of the Killer Time Beetles! [WORKING... sort of] -- I was also keeping the plot and title a secret until publish, but again New Year's Eve special so... yeah. Dave and Rose get sent to the past and have to kill these giant bug things, the titular Time Beetles. They must also unite Dave's parents in a paradox to ensure Dave's birth.
  • * John/Jane: A World Tour (That's Better than the Other World Tour I Once Wrote) -- Jane and Jade's house (they're the siblings in this AU; the kids relation goes by their chumhandle initials) is fumigated after an absolutley awful roach infestation. Unfortunately, Jane ends up in the house after it's filled with gasses. John has to rescue her, and after that the two of them see a mysterious hot air balloon that says they have the option to take a trip around the world, but it must be in 40 days "or else." The mafia gets involved.
  • * Jade/Jake: Code Milky Green(: How Getting a House Fumigated Saved an Alien Planet) -- Meanwhile, Jade is looking for a way to kill some time, but ends up stuck with Jake. (A running gag in all three of the Jade fics is that she's stuck adventuring with someone, and it's usually the last person she thinks about.) They soon get lost in the woods, and soon encounter a weird alien race (not the trolls) that is in danger.
  • * Dave/Dirk: Stridercest Vs Birdmen -- I don't think this one needs any clairification. Actually, I do. Dirk's house is repeatedly attacked by a bizarre bird-like monster, so he gets Dave to help find out how the hell the thing is supposed to be killed.
  • * Rose/Roxy: Total Drama Is- Wait... -- While Dirk eventually ended up with Dave as his only sidekick in the above mentioned fan fic, he also tried to take Rose and Roxy, but an attack by the mafia left them stranded on an island. Just why is the mafia after a group of eight kids?
  • * John/Jake: Crystal Clear -- Involves spellunking in some way.
  • * Jade/Jane: TBD.
  • * Rose/Dirk: TBD.
  • * Dave/Roxy: Hotel HAUNTED! -- Dave and Roxy have to stay at a hotel. However, it turns out (surprise surprise) the hotel is haunted. Almost every single horror cliche in the book ensues, as well as plain silly stuff that doesn't even make the least bit of sense.
  • SIMPSONS [WRITING ON HIATUS(A)] -- Simpsons parody involving some of the modern episodes (and maybe even some of the older ones) and "corrupting" them. Or at least, that's how it starts. It later becomes a surreal story about a three-sided war, and that's all I'm going to say without spoiling it.
  • That's So Cliche [WRITING ON HIATUS (A)] -- Parody of Total Drama fanon cliches before shortly decending into madness.
  • Ed, Edd n Eddy's Awesome Edventures [WRITING ON HIATUS, CAN'T GET IT TO WORK] -- Details about this posted below.
  • The Real Story [WRITING ON "SHORT" HIATUS] -- Title pending, Squirrel Boy fan fic with an odd and slightly complicated plot. Details also pending, but it draws some inspiration from Mario games (mainly RPGs and Galaxy games.) Adventure/drama themed.
  • Future/Possible/Basically Things I Haven't Started On: (In order of likeliness)

  • [Currently untitled] -- A mass crossover story involving my MUGEN roster (maybe minus a few people) and a few more characters. "Super Mario 64" is the main villain (er, actually some kind of robot project thing sent out by the real main villain), and it will involve a speed chase with an exploding mine cart, Gumball Watterson taking unexplained incredible levels of badass (because I wanted to have this happen in at least one story), and tennis with a bomb while running. Update: I have began, but I don't think it's much to make moving this to the above list worth it.
  • Extreme Musical Drama High School -- Planned to start... first it was halfway through Total Zeksmit Island, but I think it could also be after Total Zeksmit Plains or anywhere in between those two points. You know Ezekiel's reality show that he went through, and eventually won the ability to make his own miniseries? This is it! It'll obviously be about him and shed some light on his other twelve competetors. Er... Most of them would probably be made in mind to be unlikeable and shallow at first (in their TZ-proper appearances) like the A1 trolls in Homestuck, except unlike them yet like their appearance in 496, this story will be focused on trying to take that idea and give it more focus.
  • The Swyyx Project -- Title pending, it's an original fiction MS Paint Fan Adventure about this alien called Eoflit Swyyx who had just turned of age where it is tradition to move away from her parent's home and find one of her own. Unfortunately, the planet's wildlife is far beyond hostile, and there's groups of near-unkillable criminals from yet another planet, but that planet and Eoflit's are within the same solar system. I have pondered making a game out of this, for several years down the line.
  • Rewrite Trilogy -- Total Drama fix fics not really related to TDWTR. It consists of a rewrite of Island, a mini-season in between (possibly not), Action with different characters and three teams, and a new season with OCs, possibly one in space called Galaxy. First Galaxy was an idea I quickly made up to avoid having to write the then-titled "Total Drama: the Musical," but now I'm having a hard time going against it. I mean, I don't know about you, but a Super Mario Galaxy-esque season sounds awesome.
  • * Island: Simple redux of the first season. Was originally going to keep the team losses the same, but I read a few fan fics that did that and thought the idea made the fan fic really predictable and boring, so I'm not doing that. It's planned to give development to characters who have been neglected by fanon - particularly those who I haven't tried giving development to in TZP - regardless of my opinion on them. (Owen, DJ, Justin, etc.)
  • * Action: There's three teams now. Seven people are still out, but it's a different set of seven people.
  • * Galaxy: A few (Not sure of the exact number yet; it was originally 16 plus Sierra and Alejandro) new contestants join the old cast and they all go out in space. Challenge take place on different planets. Here's the part where the fan fic becomes complete crack. ...Which is just the way I like it.
  • Homeredux -- A second Homestuck remake thing; except not really. It's more like Sweet Jade and Hella John taken seriously and minus most of the arcs that involves crossover, and set in HS's original universe. (Or rather, an alternate version therof.) Specifically based on Act 2's storyline, though elements from the Mario Intermission may seep in (As for Act 3... very unlikely). While I have not started writing this yet, I currently have a rather in-depth outline of the story's events. Part of the goal of this is to encourage more "alternate sessions" AUs that don't use "swaps" for the base of the change. EDIT: WOW thinking back a serious SJAHJ is an extremely bad idea, and just for that and a few other ideas I had about it, this has moved down a few places on the Likelihood List. Like, the bottom right before the gigantic span.
  • Ezekiel -- Total Drama crack fic starring the titular character. Adventure themed. Might not do this.
  • PDL Cronicals -- Another Total Drama fan fic, centered around people in Playa Des Losers with some rather usual plots going on. AU most of the time. (...I don't like Ezekiel's elimination. That's why the reason was changed in TDWTR.) Might not do this.
  • Owned -- Yet another Total Drama one. Either a complete AU or a "season between Island and Action" hosted by Blaineley. If I do this, it might involve being able to pick who gets voted off through interactivity. May not be on this site due to its rules against interactivity.
  • Misc Ideas: (Er... ignore the "giagantic span of likelihood" above. In fact, this may not necessarly have anything to do with likelihood at all) A story that will take that dead little "Creamsicle" meme on Tumblr and turn it into something badass (hey, something about the fan art of it really got to me, okay?), like the Real Story will do to Squirrel Boy once I finally resume working on it, but that's likely to be Fox Crew as mentioned above.
  • Dead ideas (Just putting these here for the sake of having a place to have them, after all I don't want to forget them. I forgot about HTaS until I read an older draft of Movie Day's first chapter). You can use these ideas if you want, I guess just give credit:

  • Homer Takes a Step -- Simpsons fan fic that is exactly what the title says it is. Except drawn out through tiring purple prose. This kind of sank when I retired Simpsons from most of anything, and I will almost certainly not pick anoter fandom to put this in. There was a brief idea where Homer suddenly gets sucked up into some major adventure where he can barely put his one foot down (like getting picked up by a helicoper and having to cling onto it), thus preventing him from stepping and thus ending the story immediately, but... I don't know. Maybe it will be remade into a Fictionpress story later on? Like, even with flashbacks and stuff before the eponymous step happens?
  • Movie Story -- Would-be parody of Seltzer and Friedberg movies before I realized this was a bad idea. I haven't planned much for this aside from it being another Fictionpress story.
  • Pip, Rip, and Seras do Stuff -- Oh God, it was embarassing just typing the title. So that was one of the last things I did before clicking "Safe Profile" in the SJAHJ-year two-profile update. (Said update just consisted of me reading over the ENTIRe profile for once and making it up-to-date) Basically... it was a prototype, even whackier version of the Hilll King, and a Hellsing story with... those characters. I can't remember if I even came up with HUC at the time, so this was a pretty old idea. EDIT: Considering what stupid crap happens in the Crconikals series, it should say a lot about what I mean when I say I hate this idea.
  • And finally, stuff you will likely not see me write: (In vauge genres, I'm not going to make up specific not-stories just to get the point across. That's borderline strawmanning)

  • Anything pornographic. (I don't roll that way. I once made a bet to myself where if Jade stayed dead in Homestuck I would, but her death was reset-buttoned away so this got tossed away.)
  • Angst stories, or stories that only really have angst in them. (Angst is fine but I'd rather have some kind of major action to balance it out.)
  • Exactly one original character who is suspiciously similar to the author gets picked for an adventure with the heroes. (No. By the way, I tend to have my original characters either be introduced in groups or be villains/secondary/minor characters for a reason.)
  • "It's like X, but WITH PONIES YOU GUYS!" (I'm already not really part of the fandom as I've only seen one episode of Friendship is Magic so far -- the one with those Diamond Dogs (and no, Meenah's handle in SJAHJ was not a reference to that. I just needed something with DD and that popped into my mind before I even knew that there was something with that name. In case you haven't noticed, most of SJAHJ was me improving) -- so I already have bad points of not actually being familiar with the source. But doing so regardless just feels like a cheap attempt at getting in views, and that's not how I write.)
  • Update: Relatedly, you can add "X GOES TO FREDDY FAZBEARS!" Though I might work in a Five Nights at Freddy's related element into something, since I've basically seen the whole game via Youtube let's plays, but simply plopping a character into a game setting will not be the full focus of a full story. Ahem, Hecksing: The Dawn was planned to have a scene where Kamina was working at Freddy Fazbear's in the final chapter, but it was cut both because I forgot it and because I couldn't figure out where to put it in the already seemingly close-ended chapter.
  • Interquals/prequals of canon, "perspectives," or something along those lines. (Basically, anything that "could" be canon. I know a lot of people like the thought of their fan works being canon but I'm not one of them since I'm very unpleasable and dislike how any step down from the original could be in my fanworks. Not to say that they're flawless, but there's a difference between a plot element that rubbed me the wrong way by itself and that I'm just never happy with how so-and-so element turns out. Plus, in certain things like perspective stories, I find it very boring when you already know what's going to happen anyway.)
  • Yeah, total crap. I know. And I was talking about the first three lists. Not so sure about the fourth since I don't want to insult any of these ideas.

    A. Perhaps permanently, but I don't want to list a fan fic as "discontinued" unless I am 99% certain. Why are these fics listed here? Well:

    Intermissions: Innapropritate and disturbing, in general not very funny. They so far read more like a rejected Family Guy episode than like HUC or HHC. I already transfered one joke (the reader reacting to a bunch of trolls and their head exploding from the number of them) from the first intermission to Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals. And the plot of the first one is sorta gonna be done in OT32 Shenanigans. I might publish the rough draft of the chapters just so that people could laugh at what I once considered comedy.

    TDWTR: (This refers to the old version) The first and for a while only indefinite-hiatus story that I've published (and that's actually part of the reason why it's on indefinite hiatus), I find it to be a flat-out embarassment. Moreso than the SBIGtermissions mentioned just above, since TDWTR was 100% sincere while SBIGtermissions was just something I wrote out of frustration towards Homestuck's Midnight Crew Intermission. The plot makes no sense, every major character's personality is butchered (Ezekiel is a competant evil mastermind, Harold is a calm and planned genious, almost every other male is a hormonal idiot, etc., and that's not even getting started on how the girls turned out), every chapter except Japan has a stupid "action" scene that just plain doesn't fit with Total Drama, the four chapters that have been published have way too many "screw yous" towards the fandom (complete with twisting Sierra's character so that she's a "parody" of something I barely researched at the time) and in general the style just isn't something I like - line this up with my other story ideas, published fan fics or unpublished original or fan fiction, at it sticks out like Hank Hill in a field of Pikmin. At first I was just stuck on this one scene at the beginning of chapter 5 where every alliance is supposed to have a massive meetup but now I'm really starting to doubt this story. If I were to update, I would want to fix the first four chapters, which will require an amount of effort that I just don't want to put into this. (Complete with redoing a good chunk of the plot since Ezekiel is OOC-ly good with his plans.) If you really want to read a competition by me, try reading Total Zeksmit Plains. While the backstory's kind of weird and Host-Ezekiel is cringe-worthy, I try to make everyone more true to themselfs than I did in TDWTR. However, this huge rant is kind of outdated because I kinda remade this. But I still want to keep the rant, because it does kinda adress my issues with TDWTR.

    Onionstuck: Idea would generally take a ton of effort and time to work on even if I made it a text-only or text-mostly adventure, however the premise is stupid, the writing is godawful even by my standards, the characters are unoriginal (Oliver is too much like Karkat, SI is too much like sober Gamzee or if you squint Vriska, EB is too much like Calliope) and I can't really care enough about them to make them different, and many of the suggestions I've gotten are joke suggestions part of a meme completely unrelated to the comic, and for that matter completely unrelated to even Homestuck or Pikmin themselves. In an unrelated note, looking back it's hard to believe that this pre-dates... mmm... Movie Day at least, since I've had that idea for a while.

    SIMPSONS: Just plain dumb. Would be like SJAHJ only less complicated, having more confusing systems, and being taken a little more serious later on. Which I wouldn't exactly reject -- but I sure as hell don't want a Simpsons fan fic to be written like this. I could transfer this to a Total Drama crackfic, however... (Or anything. I'm especially leaning toward King of the Hill, but it runs the risk of being "The Hill King (see above) with more of a plot." Just not Homestuck because I'm already writing enough fan fics of that.)

    TSC: Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals (and, to a lesser extent, Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals) already covers the "parody fandom cliches" thing with more subelty and a lot more of an enjoyable, real plot that's not 100% focused on romance. And yes, HHC is actually subtle compared to my draft of TSC.

    Notice: I am officially retiring characters from Simpsons in SBIG, and hell possibly other fan fics unless the continuity requires it via Grandfather Clause (IE updating an old story where they already appeared such as SJAHJ, HHC because HUC said Homer would be reincarnated into Hank Hill and that's actually going to be something that occures on screen in HHC through Homer's ghost. Well... actually that's the only example. HHC is the last time you will see me write something Simpsons in SBIG, perhaps). I simply despise the newer seasons that much.

    Writing Pet Peeves:

    I feel the need to say this again, leaving moments from canon the same. Especially if it's taken word-for-word, pardon my French but that flat-out pisses me off. Don't rehash canon. And especially if the fan fic is one of those "what ifs" that are supposed to be all about change. (I mean if I wanted to see Ezekiel's elimination unfold in the exact same way I would just watch the actual episode of Total Drama where it happened.) Oh, if I see one more World Tour remake that begins with Gwen wanting reserved seats not behind Heather's pony hair, "My extensions are human hair," then Duncan makes a snide "You learn something new everyday" (I don't remember if this was taken from canon or a bunch of author copied one of them but regardless it's annoying) -- my head will explode.

    An entire chapter consisting of an AN. For that matter, when writers feel the need to split absolutely everything up into microchapters.

    And for that matter, when the first chapter amounts to repeating everything already said in the summary. It gives the idea that the author just came up with the concept and nothing else before getting something published. I don't mean like "496 says it's about the people on the meteor pairing together; so they've so far been being paired together so that's what the summary said," I mean that the beginning gives absolutely no real insight to the actual story. Like, if TZ's first chapter consisted entirely of Ezekiel explaining how he won the bonus EMDHS challenge and that he's starting a show of his own.

    I see this on AO3's Homestuck works a lot, but the summary literally just being some quote copy-pasted from the story proper. I might let it slide if said quote was actually elaborate of the plot, but most of the time, it's just vague and kind of a turn off. Or really, unelaborative "Then SOMETHING happened" summaries in general bug me. If I have to use the tags to figure out what the plot is (not their intended purpose, I'm sure), then I probably won't read the story unless there's signs that it has a VERY rare premise or it's centered around characters I REALLY want to see more of.

    When the fan fic takes place after current canon (or, though this is rarer, in a "split" from a midpoint in canon) and suddenly a pairing or more has hooked up offscreen. It's not just because it's often done with pairings I flat out hate (Cody/Sierra and Alejandro/Heather being the worst offenders), but also because it's really, really lazy writing. Look, I don't know why you would ship something if you can't even think of a reasonable scenario for them to get together without suddenly derailing them into lovebirds with no problems whatsoever. Offscreen hookups by themselves are fine, it's just when it's chronologically "between stories" that it feels lazy.

    The "love at first sight" cliche being played completely straight.

    When a pairing is written as some perfect make-out couple and either A: neither of their original characterizations are taken into consideration or B: the base for hooking them up really only takes one person into consideration and the other is just their trophy. (On the TD side of things Cody/Sierra and Heather/Alejandro are couples I have by far seen get it badly, and since I was never a fan of them it just gives me more reason not to like them. Honestly I don't read Homestuck fics much mainly because AO3 seems to lack adventure stories not centered around OCs but according to unpopular-homestuck-opinions John/Rose gets this, and according to what I've seen Jade/Karkat gets this too.)

    Rehashes of the Duncan/Courtney pairing being done with OCs. (Combines a pairing I hate with rehashing.)

    For Homestuck, I wrote an entire post on that. Do expect me to parody these; the first, second, and fifth bullet points have been accounted for, mostly HHC for the first (John saying that moiralligence means friends; the upcoming chpater 19 is all about the trolls being unable to understand quadrants) and SJAHJ for the second (Kankri giving a very specific list of blood colors by hex triplet) and fifth (Meenah pointing out Edwardcullensprite's apparant clothing).

    Update that I should really edit in on the post itself or make a new post: Okay, thanks to something on unpopular-hs-opinions (sadly, it seems to be dead right now), I'm kind of willing to reluctantly believe that there may indeed be very slight variations in troll's blood, since someone sampled Feferi's and Meenah's at different points in canon, and I don't think Homestuck pays that much attention to lighting details. I'll still going to only use the colors that have been confirmed on the wiki's color template table. And I'll believe that while there are some different colors, you'd have to have a close, side-by-side comparason to see the difference between them. None of this "there can be seventy shades and brightnesses of red but at some point it's arbitrarly considered mutated!" or, worse "there are actually a bazillion colors in between each color we know, but for some reason the society cuts them off and puts them only into twelve castes!"

    General works of media pet peeves: Glorified stalker characters or otherwise people who become really creepy with some "sort-of affection". An otherwise horrible character being instantly "excusable" for something stupid like a bad thing happened to them or a backstory thing (minor spoilers, crapping on this is Kankri's whole point in 496 early on). Characters who literally just act cute and have to be parented around by other characters (you could say any of my Nepeta dipictions - except KFTT, which mocks it by exaggerating it - is supposed to mock the fanon idea that she falls under this. Heck, anyone who would fit this in my works usually has been/will be either turning themselves into bigger badasses, considered pathetic, or otherwise not just "aw aren't they cute" fodder). Relatedly... I'll just link to this TV Tropes page. That thing where someone's about to use some kind of super powerful attack/form but someone jumps in and goes "NAW" and suddenly it stops before we see what they'll do (although I only remember two examples of that...). Works where only the main lead is the one who does all the major stuff (this was probably the one thing I didn't like about the second quarter of Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. We have this whole team established, yet Gurren Lagann and Dai-Gurren are the only mecha that do anything of note, and those guys introduced in episode seven just stay background until around the timeskip, and hardly do anything big until near the end). "Chosen one" shticks, or the hero being able to unlock some OP power because "destiny." Love potions (wait a few days for chapter 23 of HHC. I'll mace this one good.) Dumb blonde stereotypes. Characters who are derailed into being dumb blonde stereotypes.

    And finally, not a character type, but "Good, if we point out our flaws we don't have to fix them."

    Total Drama related stuff:

    Favorite characters: Ezekiel, Bridgette, Izzy, Harold, Noah, DJ

    Least favorite characters: Duncan, Lindsay, Sierra (I'm sorry but I didn't like her stalking him throughout most of the season and to me her "redemption" was kind of weakly handled; she's better off as a one-shot or something, kind of like the Pre-scratch trolls in Homestuck. Also, as someone who hates pervert-type characters that get physical with someone and get away with it, I firmly believe that she deserved every bad thing that happened to her in the series.), Courtney, Katie, Sadie

    I'll turn the characters into a complete best-to-worst list w/ reasons later on.

    Fav pairings: Harold/Courtney, Duncan/Eva, DJ/Bridgette, Cody/Beth

    Least fav pairings: Cody/Sierra (Unhealthy as hell), Heather/Alejandro (I thought the season three finale sunk it but then they pulled off a move that was one of my pet peeves listed above and had them suddenly get together off screen), Duncan/Gwen, Duncan/Courtney (Duncan's a jerk and I'm glad World Tour and All-Stars cemented that), Ezekiel/Eva (she hates his guts and unlike Harold/Courtney you can't pin a blame on Duncan for it)

    Pairings I'm fond of and might get interested in: Gwen/Trent, Geoff/Bridgette, Owen/Izzy, Courtney/Owen, Duncan/Sierra (partly because of my idea in TDWTR and it just grew from there), Izzy/Bridgette (yes this is because of TZP. Those that have seen the old version before I edited it, TFSP, would know what I'm talking about.)

    This may change during my re-watch of the first three seasons, and watching every episode of the second and fourth. I've... seen the first two episodes of TDROTI but not much after.

    Homestuck related stuff:

    Favorite characters: I made a list on a topic at the MSPA Forums pretty recently (like, June 2015-recently) but I'm too lazy to dig it up at this exact moment. Basically Rose and Jade rule and so do most of the other handle users. I don't really like any of the exiles or their plots or whatever so sue me, I've always leaned more to the characters who have actual, consistent dialogue. (...Through talking or typing. I know the exile commands were a thing but that's not often enough.)

    Least favorite characters: I'll jut list my bottom three. Gamzee (Outright admitted as a walking plot device, pretty much just a diablos ex machina reason for Nepeta and Equius to die, and his stoned personality is mostly a reference to a meme. He's an even worse offender of the "It turns out I was behind everything!" schtick that Vriska had for a while), Aranea (pre-Ring of Life she was another exposition bot and didn't really have that much development that didn't revolve around Meenah, post-Ring of Life she kinda feels like some fan fiction attempt at writing Vriska while knowing very little of her character), Roxy (not because she's overloved or anything, yeah I do think she is, but I've never many of her lines entertaining but instead pretty cringeworthy. She also makes me think of those directionless and kind of pointless fan comic things you see everywhere, and the low points of Adventure Time, I don't know why). Lord English was also on here because I personally think he's an incredibly dull and mostly generic villain with some extremely flimsy ties to the main characters (yeah I'm even counting Li'l Cal) but after ordering the characters I don't actually rank him that low. I found Caliborn's dialogues with Hussie's self insert and Dirk to both be entertaining.

    Fav pairings: Any combination of the B1 kids in general, especially John/Rose and Dave/Rose (the latter I didn't really care about until I started writing Attack of the Killer Time Beetles! and found that I kind of like how their dynamic would work. At least that's what I wrote. Admitedly, it's probably not that accurate because of how long it's been since I re-read, but make no mistake I did put some effort in there) And of course, there's the whole thing about the OT32, but that's more of a gag if anything. Except for the two fics that will focus on it.

    Least fav pairings: Vriska/Tavros, PM/Jack (Even in blackrom). There's honestly a lot of pairings that I don't give a crap about but seem popular like Jade/Karkat and John/Roxy but honestly even I'm not gonna compare them to those two that I already listed on here as my least favorite.

    King of the Hill related stuff:

    Favorite characters: Dale and Boomhauer (moreso the former), for bringing in a lot of the best humor and the former having really entertaining plots or subplots.

    Least favorite characters: Bill when he gets too creepy and thus kind of shoot any sympathy I'd have out the window, Hank when he gets too "better than you" according to the narrative, Cotton when he exists in the show, Peggy when she gets too arrogant, and Lucky.

    Fav pairings: Pfft... to be serious, I'd like to make some kind of joke here, maybe involving Sephiroth, but my mind's blank right now.

    Least fav pairings: I really didn't like it when Luanne was up with Lucky but I'd hardly say this is related to shipping so much as just flat-out bad writing. Becides, this section is kind of for "any couple with a slight following that doesn't sit well for me," not as much canon.

    Total Zeksmit Series

    This is a fan fic, planned to be a series of fan fics, of Total Drama hosted by Ezekiel with his co-hosts Justin and Geoff (last name Bacon, I thought I mentioned this already in-story), as well as a mysterious tag along Kathy (last name will be revealed as Ikaname. It's not a real last name I think, just a Majora's Mask reference. Ikaname.) who shows up time to time. The contestants are all female, with the eleven from the first canon season being the people who compete in season one. Nobody ever returns to compete after being eliminated. At least, as a full contestant in the sense of Izzy and Eva in TDI... see "lifelines" below for more information on this.

    There's two seasons definitely planned, with a possible and likely third and fourth. But that's it. There's no future plans after the fourth one. In order, the seasons are Plains, Island, Woods, and Campsites Around the World. Challenges are mostly physical and involve skill, sometimes through tricky situations. There's no Eating Gross Crap challenges or anything unfair. (Ex. of former: Brunch of Disgustingness, second part of Chinese Fake-Out. Ex. of latter: the rewards for Search and do not Destroy, That's Off the Chain!) The first two seasons contain an elimination each episode (and a double one on the first chapter of the second season), and the third will either alternate between single and double eliminations or have a double elimination every third epiosde. Or heck, the third might just be really long and have all single eliminations, but since I'm really drawn to the idea of season four I'd want to get three out of the way so doubles may be frequent. And speaking of that last season, I'm not sure how that'll do its eliminations at all.

    Unlike my other competitions, recaps will only be given at the beginning of Aftermaths.

    The settings of the first three seasons should be self-explanitory. Plains takes place in the wild prairies of Zekitunakwa. Island will take place in Wawanakwa, which in this universe is almost completely clean of pollution, but the elements of it are worse than in canon. Woods takes place in a very, very large forest that I have yet to really name, which is divided into several pretty distinct sections. (It might be named after Aokigahara - Google that and you will find out why I think TZW will be a tad bit darker than the past seasons.) TZ: CAW, however, involves Total Drama World Tour-esque travelling around various campsites that are similar in a few themes (notably such as having a tall cliff that to be honest looks quite phallic, and yes I'm talking about the cliff present in the original show). It may also involve some sort of new lifeline with a "calling" system involving the people who live around here. The idea I got later and after deciding the seasons is that Plains leads to Island in the general theme (shorter season to ease into the series's world), Island leads to Woods in the tough environment (Island's place being much, much more dangerous than in Plains, and Woods sort of building on that and taking new elements in), and Woods to Campsites Around the World in the variety of environments (the foest in Woods comes in different sections of "types," like different seasons, a "dead" section, etc, while CAW is all about jet-travelling to completely different biomes).

    There is also a side-series spinoff, called... well... Total Zeksmit Side Stories. There are no concrete rules to what TZSS has to be about: It could be AUs of the TZ competitions itself (unlikely), or anything, but the general gimmick is that it takes place in the unusual world in TZ and doesn't focus on the competitions. Instead, it's centered around the would-be contestants and to a lesser extent the would-be show staff going on very weird adventures. This is planned to begin after I'm finished with chapter 8 of TZP, and is supposed to be a "sneak peek" at some of the new contestants for season 2. And maybe season 3 once the competitions finally hit season 2. Another spinoff, already posted above (and will probably be moved here) is Extreme Musical Drama High School, again about the competition that Ezekiel came from. And, as far as current plans go, it'll only cover the season Ezekiel was in.

    But wait, let's stop talking about EMDHS and get back to TZSS. And this also concerns OT32 Shenanigans too. Considering the release of the Homestuck spinoff Paradox Space, I'd like to say that neither story will exactly be like that. For one, the chapters were planned to be long. Like, the average length of a Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals or Total Zeksmit Plains chapter-long. At the most. For two, while some of them do take place in an AU (basically an AU of an AU since neither 496 nor TZ take place in canon's worlds by any stretch of the word), both are planned to have some kind of unifying "base" universe that will be established in their respective chapters. For three, these are just written by one guy. For four, as PS stands right now both OT32S and moreso TZSS are planned to be a little more serious and action-focused, specifically regarding fighting badguys.


    Lifelines are a concept that will be introduced in season 2. Basically, each team gets a number of lifelines that varies each season, and (at least in TZI; not sure about later) they can only each be used once per team. The team captain gets the final decision to use them. By the merge, any lifelines that aren't used give the captain-at-the-time invincibility in post-merge episodes, one lifeline grants one extra day. The reason for all these limitations and rules is because they are actually extremely powerful - just look for yourself:

  • Casualty (Introduced in TZI): When this is used, the team gets to compete wearing whatever they want for the entire day. There will be more costume-based challenges in seasons 2 onward, and just as in Plains they are going to make the costumes into dissadvantages.
  • Booster Shot (Introduced in TZI): This can only be used in challenges that use a point system (and to make it more tempting in-universe, there are going to be a lot more point challenges pre-teams than there were in Plains) and it gives the team that uses it ten extra points. Depending on how the points work, this can either be stupididly valuable (IE if one contestant can only earn two points at most) or next to useless (where the points work like scoring in video games, and things in the thousands are in the norm).
  • Resurrection (Introduced in TZI): One eliminated contestant, regardless of which team they were on or if they were kicked off before the teams were formed, can be summoned back by the team captain to compete in either all challenges for the episode or just one of the challenges. The person back, however, will do as well as she wants to, and could even sabatogue the team if she doesn't like them.
  • Snake's Venom (Introduced in TZW): This is also a point system challenge exclusive. It deducts five points from one of the two opposing teams of choise. This is obviously not in TZI because there are only two teams in that, giving it too similar of an effect to Booster Shot.
  • All of the TZI ones up will probably be the final lifelines; there are no plans to add more to the three. However, there will most likely not be only one new lifeline to TZW. At least, there will be two.


    So the old chapter 4 revealed elemental types for the first time. (Really I'm only bringing this up because I don't know how else to start this section now that TFS is TZ. Wow I can't believe there's still some unfinished TFS/TZ changes.) This is realistically not going to be mentioned that much and it won't really play a role in the competitions themselves so I'll just list the nine types: Air, fire/heat, earth, electricity, plant, animal, water, toxins, and death. There are also people whom don't have any such abilities (reffered to as neutrals), and hybrids of them. More on this later.


    As stated above, the original 11 will compete in season one. Starting season two, they will also compete alongside Sierra and a dosen original characters. If I do season 3, all 24 of them will compete alongside Blaineley and OCs of an undecided number (currently thinking 9).

    Andrea the Weapon Obsessed, Hyperactive Commander Wannabe (or just the Weapon) (First competes season 2)

    Emerald Gemm the Mischivious One out of the "Gemm Triplets" (First competes season 2)

    Ruby Gemm the Hot-Tempered One out of the "Gemm Triplets" (First competes season 2)

    Sapphire Gemm the Smart, Calm One out of the "Gemm Triplets" (First competes season 2)

    Iris the "Puzzle" Enthusiast

    Kandi the Logical, Arrogant Nudist (First competes season 2)

    Kathy the Vocal Creep (First competes season 2; cameos three times in season 1 and appears in the special)

    Miriam the Unusual, Old-Times Artist (First competes season 2)

    Natalie the Witch-in-Sheeps-Clothing (First competes season 2)

    Samantha the Gangster (First competes season 2)

    Sonia the Techno, Wanting-to-Move-Foreward Musician (First competes season 2)

    Zelda the Nice Prarie Girl (First competes season 2; cameos in season 1)


    Ezekiel, Obviously

    Zelda is also Confirmed to be making a return (though since this is a prequel, it's more like a... preturn?)

    Amethyst the Annoyance

    Felicia the Musical Athelete

    Karen the "Coolkid"

    David/"Diablo" the "Emo"

    Dario? the Pirate

    For the most part, any resembelance to other OCs is coincidental, but some very light inspiration are involved. Natalie is based losley off of Nazz from Ed, Edd n Eddy though.


    Anyone who's gimmick is that they're the "second [contestant," or they're "another [contestant]" (I want to be original here.)

    A really terrible, stupid concept that's obviously not going to happen in the main TZ series (IE an actual dog as a contestant, a teenage girl expy of Adolph Hitler, the spirit of Gaia, Gwen and Trent's future daughter who time traveled to the past to try to change some aspect of the future, Katniss Everdeen who isn't an expy but literally warped through spacetime to end up in the Zeksmitverse, etc. SJAHJ and/or HHC may convince you otherwise but I do draw lines. They're just really high lines.)

    A shy girl (I can't think of anyway to not make her a worthless "aw isn't she cute" type of character. Zelda is the closest you'll get, and you'll see why she hardly counts.) Actually, taking the previous into consideration, a charater whose sole point is to be a "moeblob" or whatever you'd say

    Someone who's overly sadistic to the point of making the whole story dumb, or only intimidates the cast by being violent with them/threatening deaths (This is a Total Drama fan fic that's supposed to have a plot-flow similar to canon, not SAW. "TEH DARKURZ AND EDJIER AZ IT GEOS AWN" for the sake of being dark and edgy isn't something I like. Also eliminations have the equivilent impact of death in TZ - or at least it's close enough - thank you very much.)

    People who are like genderbents of canon male contestants (I was thinking of doing this at first, but then I thought... nah. Genderbent expies might show up in Side Stories, or in an episode that features human life outside of the game. Or as intern cameos, but again they'll only be that: Cameos.)

    The Revenge of the Island or Pahkitew Island cast (Two of the more "reasonable" options that still ends up on this list, I'll be honest. I have no plans for them at all, and I'm not going to insert canon characters for the sake of having in every canon character. This also applies to pretty much any other fanwork of mine, AU or not. My last attempt at this, at least in a blatant shoe-horn way, was Sweet Jade and Hella John (IE Auto Responder, the carapases, pretty much all of the trolls, the ancestors) and look at how "well" that went. And even individually, these guys won't really work with TZ: Staci is a joke, Dawn might contrast with the "atheistic world" TZ is set in (yeah, unlike most of my other works the Zeksmitverse is Godless and magicless even though there are elemental powers), Zoey's character just kind of ends at "is nice" (like one too many fan characters, zing!), and I haven't seen all of season four yet but I don't think Anne Maria, Dakota, or Jo could really carry stories with the TZ cast by themselves. The PI cast has better choices, but they still might not... "fit in" with the TZ game show. Especially not Ella. They might be cameoes, but that's it: Cameos.)

    Someone who wants to "prove" something IE that just because they're a woman it doesn't mean they can't fight (Both because I can already tell I'm not going to like writing them (there's nothing wrong with messages, just don't be obnoxious with them), and any hypothetical person like that who goes on a show hosted by Ezekiel thinking they can convince him anything is just setting themselves up for dissapointment.)

    A fangirl of [Insert real-life work of media or obvious fictional counterpart to it here] (I do not want to write a walking advertisement for, say, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. Nor do I want to jab at fans of, say, Twilight.)

    Someone's whose sole character is being based on being a token (I would impliment people of a certain sexuality/gender/etc -- or I could even ret-con one of the OCs into filling that role! -- but I'm not going to, say, make someone out of scratch who's only notable trait is that they're pansexual. I'm fine with diversity but having it just for the sake of diversity is very risky. Plus I don't want a walking stereotype.)

    A character who constantly spouts "lol randum" (I feel dumber just typing that) or otherwise non-sequetor statements, regardless of how many other characteristics they may have (I find those types of OCs to be ungodly annoying. Turn-me-off-of-the-entire-story annoying.)

    Canon fodder for the sake of canon fodder (I'd prefer the cast to each appear to have an equal shot at winning, and each of them being at least somewhat developed. I also don't want my early eliminations to be completely predictable, because from my experience predicable/fodder early eliminations makes the story have a really weak beginning and it becomes painfully hard for me to continue reading. I read somewhere once that a story's only as good as its beginning and its ending, and the more I think about that quote the more it makes sense. Although one of the confirmed OCs for TZI is to an extent canon fodder...)

    Not a character so much as a trait, but anyone who bears a tenth elemental class (Nope. There's only nine classes, people without any powers, and combinations between them all to varrying degrees.)

    Anything that has to do with memes (I hope this is self-explanatory.)

    REMAKING: (WARNING This gives away the eliminations of chapters 4 and 5.)

    It's not that I was unhappy with the old TZ, TFS - in fact, the only thing I don't really like is the title - it's just that I think these improvements will be for the better. Here's some changes that will happen/had happened to the series:

  • The biggest change is that there will no longer be reward challenges, and that the season will only be a miniseason of 13 episodes, counting the Aftermaths and special. The removed challenge concepts might be in TZI. The axed episodes are all the original reward challenges, with one exception: "It's a Shore Thing" will be the one removed here (a swimming themed challenge would be a nice preview for season two but pushing is becoming shoving and I'd rather it be AT season two), while "Blast to and From the Past" will become an elimination episode that will take its place (I want every season to have a cavewoman challenge and a naked challenge). This will not make the fan fic rushed, I believe, because the pacing in the current series is actually really slow right now.
  • The title will change to "Total Zeksmit Plains." "Total Fan Service Plains" honestly seems like a really repelling name and I personally don't like it.
  • Katie's elimination position will be swapped with Gwen's, and Bridgette's will be swapped with Leshawna's (the original chapter 9 elimination). Being kicked off fifth instead of third will surley lessen the blow of Bridgette losing early, which is a downside, but this will be a good oppertunity to develop her relationship with Izzy just as much as in the original version of this.
  • It no longer takes place in the future. Considering how this is an alternate timeline anyway, it doesn't really make much sense and the only point it had was to jab at Simpsons and the theorists that the world would end on December 21st, both of which are unnecessary.
  • The backstory. Instead of winning a competition, Ezekiel 'won' (it will be implied that Chris rigged it) a special EMDHS challenge where the winner gets to host their own mini reality show. As much as I would like to outright state the second season and then keep it a secret for the rest of the competition until the very last scene, that will not happen in the remake because Ezekiel would not know that his minishow will get a second season in the first place. Though I could do a similar trick, only with the third season... if I decide to go that far...
  • Pop culture references in the early chapters are tonned down significantly. I only say early because the later chapters tone them down anyway. Intern expies still stay, though.
  • Ezekiel's work as Mytube video maker Zeksmit682 and his history with Kathy are out of the story; like Justin, Kathy will now be relatively new to his... "production crew." (But not as knew. Like, he literally knew Justin right before starting TZ.) Zeksmit Clipz no longer exists. Mytube, on the other hand, does still exist in the Zeksmitverse, because I really want to show off this new "futuristic" (even though it doesn't take place in the future anymore) website that in spite of its name is more than just a Youtube clone.
  • Here's what will stay the same:

  • Heather's elimination, and all eliminations in the merge. (Basically all of them that hadn't happened in the old version of this series except chapter 9's/Leshawna's.)
  • Justin's rival is still Alejandro. Courtney's boyfriend is still the same guy, which is still a secret.
  • The elemental thing stays because I really like my idea of vampire types, and if it wasn't for the classes Side Stories wouldn't really exist, and if SS didn't exist there wouldn't be much reason to have an alternate universe, Chris's EMDHS competition comes off as more jarring, and the concept of the TZ series really falls apart from there.
  • The events of the special and everything onward (seasons 2, 3, and 4) will remain the same no matter what option I take. I can't garuntee that there will be a third and fourth season, but I'm pretty sure there will at least be a second one. (No season 2 kind of paradoxically rids the purpose for the first season. This is because Plains is more of a "season zero" to the whole series.)
  • The conflicts, friendships, and relationships. (This is an improvement, not a complete redux. Swapping the SB and KJ eliminations wasn't just reduxing, it was done because I felt that it would help the flow of the story more.)
  • Recaps are still gonna be in the Aftermaths; actually this is now good seeing as the Aftermaths will be at almost every sixth episode again.
  • Still not splitting the episodes; don't really need to. They already drag on as-is.
  • All four major members of the show staff, with their same roles. Ezekiel will still be the host, Justin will be the co-host, Geoff will be the Aftermath host, and Kathy is still the background designer that shows up sporatically.
  • The OCs, including Kathy Kathy will appear in a different patten of episodes, however; her original pattern was every power of two (2, 4, 8, 16, and an exception, 20), as well as some of the Zeksmit Clipz. Her first appearance was still in chapter 2.
  • Speaking of OCs, Zelda will still get a cameo in the form of what takes the place of the auditions during the Aftermaths. "The Teal Blaze" clip still exists, but it's no longer part of a series.
  • Pretty much every other subplot not listed in the "changed" section except possibly "Homer" (which may be replaced with another thing, but will still serve the exact same purpose).
  • I would like to note that even though the chapter challenges are the same and the same pre-merge eliminations happen, just with slightly better writing, DO NOT SKIP THEM! Especially since you did NOT know who was going to get voted off on the original chapter 9! Unless you read the above bullet lists but that's not the point!

    And finally, I'm gonna close this off with some changes made from the older revivions of this, along with initial plans that don't give away or imply spoilers of what isn't out yet (EG "This character would have won instead of..."), especially since TFSP is currently offline. This does, however, contain spoilers up to the most recent update.

  • I'm gonna elaborate on what I meant by "Zeksmit682": Ezekiel originally ran a show called Zeksmit Clipz, and back in the old version with reward challenges, those would play in place of auditions. It's mainly about Ezekiel, Kathy, and occasionally Geoff trying to pull off stunts. Zeksmit682 was the former's username. Ezekiel would have known both Kathy and Geoff at around the same time, and his history with Blaineley was admitedly non-existant until... I don't remember when yet. ZC was cut because without reward challenges, I couldn't think of any place to put them (they were pretty much thought up just so that the rewards could have a little side-clip like the eliminations), and they just felt a little pointless. While I was listing the changes from TFSP to TZP, I said (and currently still say; I haven't changed that yet) that Kathy will be about as new to his production team as Justin is. And the story itself even implies this by Justin saying that Ezekiel knows her as much as he knows him. Well... that was the intent, but it isn't any more. You will see when Ezekiel met Justin in TZ's verse, I'm not sure of the exact chapter, but it will be alluded to at some point in the first season.
  • Bridgette was going to have an evil split personality. No, this idea predated the reveal of Mal. In fact Mal was the straw that broke the camel's back in nixing this plotline alltogether, along with other issues. Like: It's a very strange character tack-on trait, I had no idea how to put it into competition form (as much as I thought he was a little too generic-MWUAH-HA-HA-y I have to admit Mal might give some ideas on that had I gone through with it) since she's a complete nutcase and I don't want any risks of actual deaths since that's kind of stupid on a competition, and the whole thing just sort of came across as being really cheesy. Especially since it wasn't going to come into play until season three, which meant two entire seasons of "Yeah, I have this killer alternate self whose better at fire powers than me, but you're not gonna see much of her outside of spinoffs until Woods" before she comes into play. TFSP has a little bit where Bridgette dreams of a time she "switched" while encountering a shark, and it would be implied that her alternate self beat the crap out of said animal. And shortly after, Izzy would find her meds and ask her about them. Anyway, this carried onto TZP, and its first chapter originally had a bit near the end where Justin asks Ezekiel to review the footage of Bridgette's performance, saying that her actions are a little suspicious or something. It would be implied that her alternate personality took control and threatened to fry the interns with her powers if they did not let her go. This, not bias (okay maybe a little), was the reason why Bridgette was the first to win the challenge, and her escaping the interns is all that remains of it.
  • Back in TFSP, Ezekiel had won EMDHS yet his doctor still ordered him some sunlight. So he decided to use the prise money to start up his own show. Now... I made it a little less far-fetched (that he would do this of all things), and that he instead won a challenge that specifically allowed the creation of a miniseries. And before that (maybe, I'll have to check), TFSP was just a series hosted on the internet and not on television. Which raised the question as to why the eleven canon contestants would bother signing up for a guy who does... well, Zeksmit Clipz. Finally and dwelving on both the embarassing and the unbelievable, one of the oldest plans while drafts for this existed was that Ezekiel was a mad scientist who created the contestants in an experiment (no, seriously. And his last name being "Smithy" would have slightly made more sense), lived with them, then wiped their memories for some reason but they were drawn back to the game. Side Stories might have focused a lot more on them living together and having misadventures, since this was before the idea of elemental classes hit. Rest assured, Ezekiel did not do any stem-cell work, and all of the current campers were made the same way almost any other human was made.
  • Believe it or not considering chapter 6, this would have had even more emphasis placed on fanservice. Hence the name Total Fan Service. And the reason for the swimsuits, cavewomen and naked challenges, and why I mentioned something about Beth and Eva getting redesigns. Those are the remains of that. There was also supposed to be a fanservicey outfit specifically made for the challenge almost every episode.
  • The latest chapter, which if I'm not slacking around when it comes to editing this profile should be "Bears, Bares, and a Whole Lot of Flare", was originally going to be called "Metal Gear Naked" and... well, the plan was vague. It would have involved the final six trying to navigate through a course while avoiding interns from spotting them, and there was going to be, like, barrels and boxes and stuff to hide behind. It also wasn't until later that I thought of "Hey, wearing nothing but color-coded toques". But that would have been for a season special (...I thought it would be cute if, say, there was a TZ reunion and the campers all decided to put on colored toques, but they weren't going to be naked), it took a bit longer before I merged the ideas together. The bears only came in because of the pun; I didn't want to reference a game series I haven't played, so bending the challenge so that it makes sense for this new title was the best I could come up with.
  • Okay, here's a biggie. Keep in mind that TZ - or rather, we're going back to when it was TFS - was one of my earlier ideas out of the stuff on this page. Said ideas were at the time limited to Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, The Real Story, Movie Day, Total Drama Race, a few other competitions, and several ideas that are probably dead by now like Homer Takes a Step. Oh yes, and those two SBIG stories, and the original plan of how that would go. And a few vague thoughts that would eventually become Blue Sun. There wasn't that much story to spread my ideas out on. Crossing over didn't sound like my cup of tea. Homestuck didn't catch my tastes yet, and I didn't even know it existed. King of the Hill was, at the time, just "Oh God is Hank annoying" (see Zombie Attack! and how Hank is one of the villains). And Steven Universe didn't even exist. Anyway, this was originally going to be a pretty huge work, with a lot of seasons. Going from Plains (then-titled Country) to Island to Woods (then-titled Supernatural) was a constant, but everything after was... basically picture like six Pahkitew Islands in a row. And that's just the start. They would have continued the biome theme - first with seasons four through eight being either one of the following from a New Super Mario Bros-esque mountain range, to a desert, to a tundra, to a swamp, to... I think the last one of those five was a jungle. They could be read in any order, and the order I published them would be determined by a poll. Also being read in any order by them, maybe, but the biome being hard-decided, was the ninth season: Total Fanservice Volcanic Wasteland. Taking place in some molten campgrounds really close to several pits and rivers of lava, volcanos, and the like. All six of these would have been, as I implied earlier, 13-chapter seasons with... 12? (Somewhere around the 10-14 range, but it was the same for all seasons) contestants new to each season, all of them themed after bits of the environment the season takes place. (EG one of the Total Fan Service Mountain campers would be gray, have some kind of rock theme, and a fitting personality to it - none of the characters were thought through very well, since I was still thinking over Island's at the time.) Season ten would have been Action, marking the return of gens 1-3 as they are all merged with the campers from seasons 4-9 and two new characters in a "megaseason" (that name was not part of the original plan. I came up with it just now). Following that, the series would continue the pattern of miniseasons set in different locations for God-knows how long, taking a few breaks maybe every tenth or fifth season for another mega one or something like that. Some of the locations would even be impossible under normal laws of physics, like a place that combine ice and lava. This was eventually dropped because... shouldn't it be obvious? Coming up with 117 characters and then merging them with another 34, only 13 of which aren't also my creation, and coming up with two more would be downright exhausting even with the "elemental personality" route I could cheap out on and take. Same with the challenges, even with the environments. And looking back, it would feel pretty different from the environment that season one starts. I mean, semi-mini season (back then TFSP/TZP had 20 challenge thanks to rewards), full season, longer season, then nothing but either mini or mega seasons seems a little too... chaotic? Rest assured though, you will still see the concepts for the campsites and maybe even the environment-themed characters: Campsites Around the World is pretty much a merge of all of these ideas into something simpler, yet still complex. It's not just a World Tour ripoff. I could even have the environment-themed campers come into play as background characters tied to the challenges... somehow, with the elemental class system greatly helping. In fact, the environment-themed camper idea is probably what set the stage for the elemental class system.

  • Leakstucksing: Ultimate Hurricane Chronicles! (Or Leakstucksing Ulumate Hurrcane Crconikals)

    Contains possible spoilers for both stories, but nothing of what hasn't been published

    Some word-of-god for Crconikals. Mostly to confirm/deny stuff I should have already, or that I maybe did but am not sure and don't want to go digging through all 30 chapters of both stories so far.

  • I had a complete doozy regarding Connie and the Great Typo Cleanup, but since it's kinda outdated now I'll have to find a way to change it.
  • Yes, detonation chips were removed from Hecksing. While Jan could be excused by his arm loss prompting Doctor to want to give him a new arm, this is why Rip wasn't blown up before Doctor could have the chance to see her clothes becoming see-through. Although since she's been ret-conned into a vampire so powerful that even Alucard is dwarfed in power, that probably wouldn't have killed her.
  • Rip's audacious outfit as well as having giant boobs is based on a Total Drama fan competition that I probably can't find even if I went looking for it. (If I did, I wouldn't link to it; that might be asking for trouble.) It was one of those app stories where people submit their characters. This one contestant was described early on as having her D-cups bounce when she jumps, and she sleeps in a see-through bra and thong. I actually checked the application and it listed something different for sleepwear, so either the story would have led to her becoming more modest or this was some really strange attempt to toss in fanservice. Speaking of which, I downgraded Rip's top from a shirt to just a bra later (on the first edit to HUC since finishing it), if because I never really liked shirt-underwear combinations for some reason.
  • Yes, I know I spelled some of Rip's dialogue wrong. Namely, the recap.
  • HHC is what possibly started my eventual habit of turning the 32 non-Cherub players into one big (not literal) orgy. Heck, I'll even go as far as to say that without HHC, 496 wouldn't come to be. Maybe. That probably isn't true.
  • Betrayal makes Alucard and Carl sick. I think HUC's first chapter was supposed to have a line where, after Flanders reveals himself as a traitor, Al would say something like "Traitors. It makes me sick... gosh!" but I didn't get to writing that. And Carl would have called back to it. Speaking of which, as with a certain Alejandro, Alucard was supposed to dislike being called "Al," which is why he was called "Al" so many times in the narrative and his Bro calling him that was written in bold. (As it was implying the reason why he doesn't like it.)
  • Hecksing's full backstory in Carl Stevens Universe is mostly the same, except Seras acted more in-character and didn't abuse Carl for every single thing he did. (She only does when he actually goes too far.) Oh, and the criminal from Seras's past's gun was visible. And instead of having a tank, Alucard just flew to the Eagle in the same jet, and since it was wrecked he couldn't escape Jan's blast in time. (That and he only had three seconds to leave.) The Millennium are still idiots, who went to capture the UK's prime minister (who isn't Quimby) and later on used a giant mecha thing. EDIT EDIT EDIT: If she will appear in later Crconikals installments, she will be remade to be a little more in-character.
  • Speaking of Seras's criminal, apart from the obvious recycling/stealing of a Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged joke (I apologize for that and HUC's edit will change that EDIT it already did), the part where he does get an actual gun only to set it on the floor before it seemingly fires on its own is based on a Haruhi fan fic I saw on a fic-MSTing forum. Oh, and on an unrelated note, originally I said that his end came because he was the guy who drove the truck that hit Luke, and Alucard went by a description Seras gave earlier, gave him a lie-test, and ate him and his familiar died along with all the others when Alucard was nuked. Then I re-read chapter 10, and at least that confirmed that Seras killed him on their second encounter. So... the guy driving the truck, that's the issue this will adress, since I had the idea to make him an established character and now he isn't. He's... Will Smith, and ironically (Men in Black) Alucard had to wipe his memory of vampires. I think CSU said this, but this memory wipe was because Integra wanted to keep vampires a secret, while Carl was more open towards exposing them. Although considering the world of HHC, this was one horribly kept secret driven irrelevant by all the weird crap.
  • Killing off all Simpsons characters (bar Quimby. So far, anyway...) was not intentional at first, and I looking back I find it amusing that two of them in HUC never crossed paths (Flanders, Homer, and Quimby were the only ones if memory serves; the first and second were killed before the second and third's introduction respectively). However, sometime from the end of HUC to HHC, I went "oh heck yes, kill off all of those annoying Simpson guys."
  • By an astonishing coincidence, "Carl" is one of the few if not only first names to exist in both Earth and Mars. It's actually really exotic and rare on Mars. "Stevens" too, for surnames.
  • Yes, Integra did just let a lot of London's population to die at the hands of Millennium's army in chapter 8. That was supposed to be seen as a jerk move. I... don't know why I thought that was a good idea. I guess I just needed a reason to let that go over? Or maybe I was trying to make Carl's rise as being the new leader after her death to be seen as more of a good thing?
  • This is leaning into my general Homestuck works, but I'll answer one of the many questions nobody asked (get used to this. Heck, that's what this entire section is): "Why isn't Consort Guy/fedorafreak/this other PDA guy/the denizens/the one carapacian that blahblahblah/this animal (including Serenity)/Davesprite/any sprite but sort-of Jadesprite (you'll see what I mean in 496) and Tavrisprite? for that matter/the doomed timeline self that.../His Honorable Tyrany/Alt Calliope/this celebrity/the canon fantrolls in any of these?" And similarly, "why do the exiles/underlings/SBAHJ main characters/tricksters hardly appear outside SJAHJ, the second only having small appearances in 496 where they're killed, and the former also getting some brief wording in KFTT but nothing else?" The answer to both questions is sort of in the latter: I'm not aiming to have every single character make an appearance, or at least I stopped doing that when it came to SJAHJ because it's not a perfect idea. The exiles were shoehorns (I'm not talking about canon, I'm talking about both SJAHJ and KFTT), the underlings were only generic enemies that hardly got any light on them and can easily be replaced depending on what the story is, and while SBAHJ did have a specific meaning it was kind of limited to SJAHJ's plot. The same can be said for the Felt (including Scratch) and Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals. And I think tricksters stopped being fun when their design was changed because OOH CHERUBS and it's revealed that they don't really do that much becides convert their friends and make weapons and Santas. Pretty much, I only like having the human and troll groups as the stars, and I've been kind-of recently opening up to their ancestral counterparts as well. And I can't find anyway to bring in any of the sprites except Jadesprite-personality-wise (again, 496 will get to that, and in fact what's out of the story now kind of hints at what I mean) without making a repeat of canon, something I do not like doing unless the story was Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. Bottom line, they'd either be innapropriate to the story (HHC, for example, is not the kind of thing that would be continuing "John loves Nick Cage" gags - partly thanks to John himself, and HHT doesn't really belong in Act 5 Vs Act 6), impossible to not be shoehorns or come off as fandom memes (you can tell from the anti-desperate Eridan jokes in SJAHJ that I'm not too welcome with memes), contradict with the plot (Alt Calliope is impossible in 496 and SJAHJ because Cherubs don't normally exist and we already have the Quimbys, and everywhere else would seem like a deus ex machina), or again run the risk of going "Hey look it's just like what happened in canon!" (The sprites, for the last one.)
  • There's Naruto references and concepts sprinkled throughout at least Crconikals because I was under the impression that that's the kind of thing that ticks people off. This includes the title of Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals. Hurricane Chronicles. That's what Shippuden means. PS, you'll be seeing a LOT more of that in Hecksing: The Dawn. And now that HTD is out, I can say that by that I'm talking about the greater emphasis on Walter's "jutsu".
  • I'm not completely sure when I decided to give the SBIG stories real names beyond "SBIG: Series Name," but Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals's name is... an obvious mispelling/play on Hellsing Ultimate. "Crconikals" because of this "Book of Historical Fafcition" or something like that, and I liked how it repeated the "F" sound twice. "Ulumate" is pronounced... pretty much like "Ultimate" but with another "u" sound instead of "ti". "Crconikals"... Cr-kon-ick-als. Also pretty self-explanatory.
  • Saving what is perhaps the most shocking of all for last: Carl is a Charlie Sheen reference. But on a more serious note, take in mind that Sheen's real name is Carlos Irwin Estévez.

  • Sweet Jade and Hella John.

    Yes, this is over. Yes, it was an ultimate old shame to end all old shames (except for TEE. Seriously, that was/is terrible). Yes, I doubt that many people have made it that far (I doubt anybody made it this far in my profile). Yes, I know I said editing will start shortly, yet as of November 2,014 it's untouched aside from the final update back in July of last year. However, before I update it (which, by the way, will not be until after finishing Total Zeksmit Plains at the soonest; I do not consider this a high priority at all), I want to clairify some author's word here, as with "Leakstucksing" above. These questions may or may not have already been answered in the narative, I'll have to check some time later:

  • The reason why there's a tank in the Strider household is because Sis is extremely paranoid that Sleepy Dogwoman will attack again.
  • The "human ancestors" all do kind of share names with their HHC counterparts. I say kind of because Dave's Bro and Roxy's Mom(/Sis in HHC) have been genderbent, and so it's a little bit trickier. Katana Chick is named Lily, Grand Highbuck is named Violet, Adventure Dude is named Dean, and Reddy McCoolshades is named... Dale, I guess that leaves?
  • Most of the Millennium's actions can be explained by this: Lord Major Quimby is a complete idiot. Except for Rip. Her actions can be explained by: She's crazy.
  • Um... I guess Hecksing/Hellsing (I honestly forgot which name they went by)'s backstory is the same as the first chapter of HUC, with Heavensing being an individual unit instead of part of a greater HRG. Carl did, in fact, end up killing Pip, except unlike before he ended up taking him over. Pip's death was still an accident, except Carl feels a lot guiltier about it and tries to take over his life through use of a paper-thin disguise (it's the eye-patch) so that his friends won't be dissapointed.
  • This is not just some AU/alternate timeline of Crconikals. Because I didn't like how its verse works (wiping a universe from existance from just one paradox seems a little too harsh), SJAHJ's multiverse opperates on a completely different laws of... physics? Than my other works. It also takes place in a completely seperate multiverse. The fact that Quimby and Hank are so different from their Crconikals counterparts should be an indicator of this.
  • I have no idea how Steven Universe would play in SJAHJ's world, since SJAHJ ended before I took interest in SU and indeed before it even aired. The editing will almost certainly not cover it. So unless there's a sequel, indirect or direct (neither likely), don't expect this to come up until I can make up my mind as to how "real" it is in SJAHJ's world. (Co-exists with HS/KOTH/Hellsing, part of the Mario session but otherwise fictional, show-within-a-show brought to life ala Homer/BR/CU, or purely show-within-a-show.)
  • I actually tried to avoid showing swastikas because I was not sure if that would violate the MSPA forum rules. I'm still not completely certain. A lot of the weirder things I did in this story is because I'm not sure if the original plan would violate the MSPA forum rules. Believe me, the end result dialogue, especially earlier into the story, was toned down. Specifically what Jade says. Specifically about Dave and their ancestors. I also had to lurk around before getting the idea that ectoincest won't get the story insta-removed from the site, hence why there was very little John/Jade teasing near the beginning.
  • Going back to what I probably confirmed already, Jade is characterized to be so horrible to turn around the common dipiction of her I hear of as a really nice and never agressive person and never fighting back any idea no matter how much she dislikes it. And... this one's a little more petty (and not confirmed on the forums I'm sure of it), to try to "outdo" characterizations of her that make her kind of, for a lack of a better word, really open. Like, tomboy who doesn't give too much of a damn about nudity or whatever. I don't know. The thought made sense to me at the time.
  • Oh yeah, spoilers, having Jade as one of the few survivors and not undergoing that much character development afterwards was mostly to tick people off.
  • Nepetazilla did turn back into normal, bright red blooded Nepeta (I refuse to use the term "candy red," simply because I think of candy-like blood and that sounds disgusting) by the end. The fact that her chaticon was red instead of white on the final page sort of implied this, but it could easily be mistaken for something else (convenience, since an actual white icon would look invisible and it seems like ODP is contacting John from the dead about his actions) and... oh, speaking of Nepetazilla, all Leijons have their clothing specifically design to be able to morph into any size whenever they themselves grow or shrink. These girls were just really, really prepared. In addition to the whiteblood powers, as the text itself says anyway. If anybody else tried to grow massive like that, they would probably rip their clothing. That's why the Slender Aranea-like being in Carl Stevens Universe was "naked" nah it's not Slender Aranea it's a random monster that kind of looks like her.
  • John and Nepeta's break up was kind of based on real life events, but not in the way you would think. I'll elaborate more in the "What would you do if you see someone wearing a Homestuck shirt" thread (because I think that's what the thread is also for) later, but the gist is, I didn't want to feel... I don't know, akward? that they were together. This would probably make a lot more sense in context, but the bottom line was that nobody really made me break them up. Of course, I don't really care anymore, since they (as with the other SJAHJ-patronships, and the Prospit kid's original "rivals" with their patron's A1 stand-ins) will be roommates together from... pairing nine? of 496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems, and a bunch of stuff escallates from there, and thanks to the premise they will hook up in that story anyway to become one of the 496 (snicker, snicker, spoilers there's a lot more maybe end spoilers) pairings. Oh, and if John and Nepeta were still together, then Jade might be with a still-living Kanaya, and earlier would have used her then-last two lives on Equius and Feferi, who will date Jane and Jake respectively. (Her reviving Dirk was unnecessary as with Dave killing him, and Jenn could have found life another way.) Just because all patronships, and to tick off anyone who hates SJAHJ-Jade.
  • To bring in yet another Nepeta-related thing, let me explain something: About half of the jokes based on her were based on this misconception I had that her and Meulin's last name was homophonic to "Legion." Including the last page. If the MSPA wiki is reliable, it sounds similar to "lay-on." Oops.
  • Expect to see more of the following in later and unrelated works: The Curse Woman (now with 100% more backstory!), Omega Drew Pickles, Hydra (Death Mecha and Darkhorse, on the other hand, might have met their ends in HHC, or might not have), Adventure Time characters (a future SBIGlet it planned to focus on them at least), Dave's end result (just as a seperate character), my self-insert (he'll get killed off every appearance), dream-entering, SJAHJ-styled dreamselves (these concepts I liked, and they'll probably be more of an indicator to tell the difference between dreams and reality), SJAHJ's patronships (Nepeta to John, Kanaya to Jade, Equius to Jane, Feferi to Jake), the Fox Crew (with lots of different members of course!), the Hank-Rip rivalry or at least them having some kind of relationship, and the concept of a ton of technicolor alternate selves of someone (already planned for one story).
  • Expect to see no more of the following in later and unrelated works: Elitaa, Puerco, and Activist (you can tell I'm bad with fantrolls), F.A. Mike, doll-head Silencer, A2 ancestors without A1 ancestors (Dave's Hangover being the only exception, unless Homestuck or Paradox Space updates with info on them before DH is out but I'm curious as to which one is less likely and I'm very hesistant in taking the latter worth a grain of salt), Aranea and Meenah being more important than the other A1s (I'm trying, and in fact I thought I did well with SJAHJ itself since Meenah's only roles were back in the intermission, then again she kind of started all of the vampires so...), references to other fanventures (sorry but that ship has sailed, with exceptions like the breif nod to Superego), and Everybody's Evil But the Main Characters. Oh and SJAHJ might be my last, and therfore only, SBIG installment that uses suggestions.
  • This will probably be moved to a Tumblr post later, along with other "leaks" (I guess, that's what the name of an SCP thread with a similar purpose is called) of my other fan works.


    Here's a little more specific details about the fic, but it's still the very bare basics.

  • These are part of the same fan fic; the premise is listed above. Polygamy aholy! (Which is partly supposed to fill in the void of me ending/remaking Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, and partly because I couldn't think of that many settings and I didn't want to write all dreambubble fics.)
  • To recap and elaborate: the pairing centered in the ficlet will always be done in the flushed quadrant/"regular" human romance. Also, since I've decided to have all pairings happen in the same setting, let's face it: multiquadrant writing will get really messy, really fast. Conversations that would be intended to be serious would read like conversations between the trolls in Sweet Jade and Hella John. And I absolutley hated looking back on the conversations between the trolls in Sweet Jade and Hella John. Also I don't want to nitpick between which pairings I want to actually hook up and which I want to keep as rivalries/mediation triangles (which contrasts the groups-of-two thing anyway unless you don't count the mediator)/one-person-pacifies-the-other, because those three don't actually feel like romances to me for obvious reasons. I'm sorry, but I can't take the quadrants seriously. Yes, I know that was the intent.
  • INFO ABOUT THE COUPLE LIST: (Minor spoilers?)

    Here's a rule: If I'm stuck on one chapter and work on a future chapter, then I finish the future chapter, once the chapter I'm stuck on is done I will publish both that and the future chapter at the same day. You can probably expect this to happen a lot with Jake, since each chapter pairing him up begins with an excerpt from his crappy comic book draft, which I cannot write at all. Fortunately (or not since that would mean the later chapters are more dense with him), the next Jake chapter isn't for quite some time.

  • You already know that the first F/F pairing is Jane/Roxy at number one, and according to the closing AN the first M/F pairing is Jake/Terezi at three. Well, the first M/M pairing (which is also coincidentally the first incest pairing) is not until eleven.
  • Dirk/Kanaya is within the first 30 pairings but I don't think this is important because that kinda-meme doesn't seem to be as popular anymore.
  • Patron shipping fans, don't hold your breath: Three of them are in the four hundreds (one of those three being the third-to-last couple), though the other one is number 34.
  • Tavros will be the last person to get involved in a pairing, at couple number 63. Bizarrely, the second-last person, Equius, will have his first chapter back in couple 29. The former will be first paired with a guy and the latter will be first paired with a girl.
  • Both of Karkat's shipping grid pairings are in the two hundreds.
  • All but one of the Sweet Jade and Hella John patronships (John/Nepeta, Jade/Kanaya, Feferi/Jake, and Equius/Jane) happen before 100, and the one that doesn't is only shortly after. Two of them are back-to-back.
  • Dave is the first person to "complete" a harem of all 31 other players. Thinking about the first half of Sweet Jade and Hella John, this is actually a pretty fitting coincidence. Jane is the second.
  • My least favorite of these 496 possibilities (hint: scroll up) is a little after 100.
  • All of the "Crackcest Decathalon" ships are at a point after pairing 100, with widely varrying distances.
  • The last couple is crack. Cross-session crack, too.

  • Total Drama World Tour Rewrite Rewrite

    If you liked the old version, you will probably like this. It's the same basic plot, but with better wording, pacing, and less complaining from my part.

    The following will be/has been changed from the original fan fic:

  • Ezekiel's accomplishments and aditude will be toned down significantly. He will still pull the strings behind Owen's elimination, only he won't actually mean to kick him off. He doesn't actually start making master plans until after Owen loses (scratch that, so far it's coming out as he won't until Tyler loses thanks to how I'm doing chpater 3), and even then he's terrible at them and has to get bailed out several times.
  • Removing most of the meta humor. No, just no. Also, in a less related note, I think Homestuck has turned me off of the idea of meta humor by loads. Seriously.
  • A few of the eliminations will be changed from the old version. All of the eliminations of the chapters that have been published of the old version AND a change in plans for New York, except Egypt's chapter, will be changed.
  • The ship battle in chapter 2 and a sled fight in chapter 4 (maybe not for the latter) will still take place, but the arrow scene in the first chapter has been heavily remade.
  • Lindsay and Leshawna will be on swapped teams; there's no point in having Leshawna on Victory other than dumb angst (and as someone turned off by fan fics that treat interteam interactions as something horrible or "They must be making a secret alliance!" said angst is even dumber), and Lindsay sucks too much to be a part of the "central" team. Also she gets to compete with her best friend so there's that. Tyler and DJ also "switch" in both teams and in the Guy's Alliance; it makes more sense, now all five members would be ones that have/had girlfriends. This now means that Team Chris is the only one left unchanged.
  • Removing that thing about the teams not being allowed to invite eachother over to the economic/first class since there wasn't really that much purpose to it. Also this would make way more oppertunity for the eight girls to all be together more often.

  • Ed, Edd n Eddy's Awesome Edventures

    (TV Tropes page, since I don't consider this important enough to link to on the main list above at the time)

    Like the SBIG series, this is my attempt at "irony." There are two series of episodes: "Awesome Edventures," which are mostly not connected and mostly consists of people (not just the Eds) fooling around, with abnormal incidents being very common. "Story" episodes are part of a longer, nonsense plot. Except I might not do the story episodes, or at least heavily re-work them into a simpler plot.

    This may be in either webcomic or video form. As of now, it depends on how determined I am to try to see why Windows Movie Maker won't play Speakonia files (I exported one to .WAV format and it says that it cannot play the file for some reason.)

    Episodes -- Awesome Edventures:

    [Note: Unless stated otherwise, these episodes are not listed in planned production/air order.]

    "Ed Pool:" Eddy and Edd are attempting to play a game of 8-ball, but Eddy repeatedly hits the wrong suit. They then try to play 9-ball, but Eddy keeps hitting the balls in the wrong order (might not do this scene). Frusterated, Eddy comes up with a freestyle and customisable billiards game, but things go wrong when the "mines" (which is an obstacle you're supposed to avoid hitting) turn out to be a little too realistic. Highly likely to be the pilot, and pretty much a "test" episode.

    "Breakin' Out:" A rewrite of the episode where the Eds and Jonny attempt to escape from school, wherein they actually succeeded in leaving instead of (SPOILERS!) getting caught on the fence and being shot back. Highly likely to be the first lengthy episode. ("Ed Pool" might only be a test about two minuites long, while this will be about five to eight.)

    Episodes -- Story:

    [Note: For context, the "Story" episodes take place after the movie. Also, these are in production/air order.]

    "A Awesome Beginning:" [sic] The Eds are hanging around when the Kanker sisters attack them. Angered, Edd makes a plan to gather the other kids for revenge. However, it turns out that the Kankers have gotten Jonny on their side.


    This is a word list on all of the SBIG installments. My goal is to make this, as a whole eventually much longer than Homestuck (I don't care about the rest of MSPA). Going by their initials, and in publishing order:

  • TEE: 735
  • ZA: 928
  • HUC: 25,763
  • SJAHJ: 269,986*
  • S and L (I can't use the "and" character otherwise it seems to completely bonk up the formatting) TaF: 150;
  • KFTT: 2,248
  • HHC: 133,622;
  • GVS: 7,522;
  • HTD: 9,954;
  • Total: 442,908. HS's was at around 700,000 before Act 6 Act 3.

    Asterisk: I just went to the search page, copied everything, pasted it on a word counter, and removed the copyright at the bottom and the links at the top. This seems to count the dates, so if anything it's actually lower.

    Semi-colon: So far. Only counting the latest thing I have published. Unpublished later chapters are not added. To keep this simple in case I update something without updating this (expect that to happen as I may completely forget about this), this is as of the 20th of March 2,014.

    Author's notes are not counted. Neither are the footnotes of Zombie Attack!

    PS since S&L is completely visual, I individually counted the words in the actual images. (Well, at first. A formatting error wiped out the line, so I had to add everything else back up and subtract that from the total to get the result) Thanks to the short length. (Not including the "Sheldon" and "Leonard" tags, or the names or their shirts, or "unintentional" word duplications. Or the "Big Bang Theory" logo. Note that, thanks to the way it's formatted, I could very well miscount at certain spots.) SJAHJ does have some visusal-only words, I will not hand-count them.

    Yeah the second S&L strip is only 22 words long though.

    Anyway, for the future... well, I estimate that HHC will have at the absolute, if-I'm-stuck least 10,000 words per each of its six chapters in season six, followed by whatever season seven ends up like. The latter of which could range from really short to soul-crushingly long. Oh, I took the average of the words of chapters 11-17. It's around 12,000. I went with seasons four and five because their individual chapters are a lot longer and they paint the picture for how season six may go down.


    I also have the game/engine M.U.G.E.N. (no, I don't know what it stands for - the creators even forgot.) At times, I make characters for it, but I don't really have much to show for it. Probably the most edited character I have is my testing character Template Man, a Kung Fu Man edit that just has some stuff I found around the internet shoved in and a lot of technical oddities that would be very inappropriate for an actual character (such as making the stage change colors based on his stats and the enemy's health or having a hyper that purposefully can be used to make him stand on air), so I might not release him until after I've made it clear that he is not meant to be balanced at all. A lot of the other character ideas I have are either very bizarre jokes or, this is part of what would take some of them so long, characters that don't really have an existing version and also lack sprites. I'd... try to get an account for a file-uploading website but for some reason I feel very unsure and unsafe about doing that. Anyway, consider this a "mini profile" of sorts specifically about my creations, and this is the list:

    Started on:

  • Aformentioned Template Man: A KFM edit with bizarre attacks and images, a lot of them Hank Hill related. Has a luck-based hyper and an oddball with a lot of gimmcks.
  • Cheaper Edd: An edit of a version of Edd from Ed, Edd n' Eddy that I found mildly cheap due to a strange auto-guarding and how his one hyper left him invincible. Currently at a very unfinished state. He's planned to have an absolute boatload of hypers and several unfair attacks but still be beatable in a boss-like way. Right now he's just Edd with some jacked up stats (I might even lower his health a little so that it doesn't take too long to KO him), a striker system that can summon one of five strikers with their own unique behaviors and dodging/blocking methods to counter them, auto-regenerating power, two additional hypers, and some weird intros. Cameo allies include Dave from Sweet Jade and Hella John, Red Bull, cheaper versions of Eddy (and later Ed), a still picture of Hank Hill Smoking, and .GIFfany from Gravity Falls. PS, Alex Hirsch confirmed that .GIFfany is how you spell her name.
  • Homer Army: The Simpsons. I started out just using this "clone-type" code on a self-made copy of Homer Simpson's file, but I might scrap that and make a new Homer-based character from scratch completely with Simpsons arcade game-based sprites. He currently has two palettes that the base Homer (Team SMRT's, for those wondering) doesn't: Pink pants, and mostly black or dark gray except for red eyes and shirt.
  • Tagger: One of the many really weird ideas I had when I was younger and was into MUGEN in the past. You know those people on video-sharing websites who put in irrelevant words in the description just so it could come up in results? Tagger's based on that. His gimmick is that he's speedy and normally weak, and is only a two-button character, but if he uses his standing punch a number of "tags" will fly and you have to either guard fast or just be lucky, otherwise they'll quickly chip away health until you're KO'd. Appearance-wise he's a brightly-colored guy in a gas mask, and by brightly colored he's got a neon green shirt, pale blue pants, and blank-white hair in his default palette. Yes, he does take the gas mask off. It's currently his only intro, where he's seen putting it on.
  • Glass of Water: A joke character that's basically a literal glass of water. It can't do anything, and if hit, it shatters and dies instantly. All I have for this thing so far is some sprites, but failure to get these sprites to work at first thanks to... I think it was palette issues? Is what inspired me to make Template Man in the first place.
  • Ideas (I'm just mostly jotting at this point, only Red Pikmin is likely to be made and that's because there's actually sprites of it, which explains why a lot of this is kind of a train wreck right now):

  • Red Pikmin: From Pikmin. Planned to be really weak but mostly reliant on summoning other Pikmin as strikers. Yes, I realize that having an individual Pikmin fighting individually kind of kills the whole spirit of the Pikmin games, but... I want a playable solo-Pikmin. Or heck, a Pikmin character in general.
  • Omega Drew Pickles: Rugrats-ish. Another old idea of mine, in fact this debuted as a character for this game (not SJAHJ or HHC). He looks bizarre and his main gimmick is that he would be another overpowered boss-type. His main gimmick might be that he can only guard and/or crouch either a finite number of times per round or a finite amount of time per round, but is otherwise extremely powerful. Yes, he's still a liquid metal kill robot, in fact this came from an idea of an intro where he drops in frozen, gets shot to pieces, melts down and reforms. You know, like the T-1000.
  • Hank Hill: King of the Hill. I want a mower-related special. He'd be on the top priority if there was an actual sprite sheet of him. Might be slow but strong. Vdjh ri Iruhvw I'm sorry what?
  • Brenda: Perfect Hair Forever. Plays a lot like Roy, Lucina, and the other guy in Super Smash Bros. with having the same specials. Might even have a breakable guard. Hi no kenja
  • Sheldon Cooper: The Big Bang Theory. Over the top, laser-based, probably weak because Hollywood Nerd. He finally has a working sonic death ray. 01010011, 01100001, 01100111, 01100101, 00100000, 01101111, 01100110, 00100000, 01110111, 01100001, 01110100, 01100101, 01110010 (OOC I really hope that doesn't trigger a spam filter or something)
  • Kamina: Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. Needs to exist. Then again so do more TTGL characters but Kamina would get top priority from me for a fan fic-related reason that will be revealed in HHC's final season (or in Housestuck: The Split) but hints for it is worming its way to this list. SAGE OF SPIRIT! THE MIGHTY KAMINA DOESN'T USE CIPHERS!
  • Alucard Badguy: Hellsing, or rather Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. Boss-type character where he's entirely in his tank and has a limited attack set. wodahS fo egaS
  • Ed, Edd n' Eddy: The Mis-Edventures: Self-explanatory origin. Surreal boss character that's mostly a giant copy of the game itself floating in the air. Attacks entirely by sending out weid projectiles. Possibly can't block either but I don't want to rip off Omega Tiger Woods too much. Out of everyone I might actually make this... thing next, after Red Pikmin of course.
  • The Wonderful 101: Self-explanatory origin. Actually Wonder-Pink. Kinda like Red Pikmin, she'll summon the minor female members of the team a lot as strikers, but is a lot more offensive on her own.
  • Skirtless Peach: Super Mario, sorta. Another weird character based on the option in Smash Bros debugging to make Peach's skirt invisible. I thought, hey, why not try to toy around with Super Princess Peach sprites and make an oddball joke character out of this? Again, has a lot of strange and untraditional fighting game attacks. And yes, Skirtless Daisy and Skirtless Rosalina are strikers.
  • Shrek: Shrek. Shrek.
  • ? Sonic: Sonic the Hedgehog. Another old idea of a highly quirky Sonic the Hedgehog with intentionally spammy attacks. This one might never get past the thinking stage because after giving it some thought it's a bit boring. The question mark is from how I want this character to be prefixed, but I can't think of an appropriate prefix.
  • Nude Bart Skateboarding: The Simpsons Movie, sorta. An intentionally terrible character that just takes "sprites" from screencaps of this web game that's made to tie-into the movie. Has attacks that don't make sense and generally would be bad, but... I might make him balanced. Definitely give him hit boxes that make sense though, I don't want to be flat-out unfair.
  • Nepeta Leijon: Homestuck. I was originally gonna plan John, Jade, and Karkat too but Act 6 is wearing on my interest so as a result this comic is probably only getting one character out of me, and I want it to be the Canadian one. (Also I used to like John but Jesus his retcon power and seeming ability to win fights just because he's mad is starting to piss me off) But to be more serious (I'm not actually calling the character Canadian it's a fan fic thing that I have yet to put into something) she'll probably not be that true to canon, especially when it comes to hypers. A lot of them may be based on my own fanworks, and as a result make zero sense. If anyone complains about that, I'd say do your own character, because I'd still like to play as other Homestuck characters and it's just that the community seems to lack them. Also I keep picturing her eventual, original sprites looking something like Dee Bee Kaw's, particularly the standing pose.
  • Female Character's Butts: An Uppercut-inspired oddball, this cycles through a lot of different female charactres from different mediums (probably mostly western cartoons since I'm most familiar with them), and every single standard attack plus some specials involve hitting the enemy with their asses. The original plan was a Homestuck-ish character named Cheesecakestuck, but see above. Canadians only.
  • I also have this one idea that would give away the end of I Thought Those Were the Ingredients, another cheap character to rival Cheaper Edd that's a bit of a self-parody of me making said character overpowered in said fan fic, maybe.

    All of these are planned to be largely originally sprited except for Tagger's mask, Template Man, Cheaper Edd, Red Pikmin, EENE: TME, and NBS.



    With Movie Day published, I still have some problems with Soap and Real Story. For the former, I have a few ideas down for chapters and the like, but I realized that I haven't given much depth to any of the characters at all. For the latter, I already have the canon characters with personalities (Bash the show all you want and say that the Squirrel Boy characters are two dimensional or whatever but I can garuntee that they have more depth than my current plans of the Soap cast.) and I have given some thought into the original characters as well, I just have no idea how to excecute the plot without it becoming either a jumbled mess or a lame "fight this one villain then go to the next then the next" storyline. (You can tell with SJAHJ that I like complicated, multi-sided plots.) I have been flip-flopping as to which of them I should do first. As of this profile update, I'm going with Real Story, but that could change.

    Originally I had a huge list about getting some fics out within a certain deadline, but after the Halloween Update (Basically GVS chapters 1 and 2; TDWTR 1 and 2; and 496 pairings 3, 4, 5, and 6) but I have no place to put this, here's me confirming that SBIG shall be annual.

  • 2009: The Eds' EDventure.
  • 2010: Zombie Attack!
  • 2011: Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals.
  • 2012: Sweet Jade and Hella John, Sheldin and Lenard Tock About Fysics, Kids Fit the Trolls, and Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals.
  • 2013: Gumball Vs Satan
  • 2014: Hecksing: The Dawn and SBIGlets.
  • 2015: I'll try to squeeze in The Journals of Wisdom, Power, and Courage and/or naruto the guy with the ninja before the year is over.
  • By fic - Published:

    Total Drama World Tour Rewrite: Finalized most of chapter 3, finished chapter 4's rough draft. Started on 5. I would have this updated by now, but I don't like the attention it's getting compared to TZP (not saying much) and I don't want it bumped back on the first page again. So I'm delaying this until a little after TZP's next update. Which is soon. Look below.
    Total Zeksmit Plains: Started a little bit of chapter 9.
    Onionstuck: I've been working on the update sometimes... less often recently, though. You know, this has been in such terrible condition that I'm considering calling it discontinued until further notice. But as I want all of my published stories to be considered having potential for completition, I may replace this with another Sburb fansession and call it a "remake." Except not. Since the players may be alternate versions of the demons from 360 Degree Duck.
    Movie Day: After servere writer's block on chapter 2's beginning, things have been getting just a little bit better now. By the way, since I don't want to give this its own section yet, I will use this to say that by MD being an "experiment" I mean that it will sort of pave the general "adventure" template for future works I class as an adventure. Soap, Real Story, Everburn, maybe even THE BEST FAMILY and 360DD will have a few themes in common with it. Like the whole travel idea. MD is literally almost all about traveling, an element that future adventures will downplay but still have. And like exploring new environments, although these future works will not be downplaying that, believe me. And, of course, all five of these are definitely going to be more complex than MD and a little darker (in some cases, the latter's not saying very much).
    Sheldin And Lenard Tock About Fysicks: There will probably only be five comics total. Even so this is still a low priority.
    Kids Fit the Trolls: Sequel's comin' soon. Probably after I knock out TZP's... eighth or ninth chapter, and while I'm working on TEE. Or not, since I do kind of like some of the plans for A5VA6 and I don't want to wait until I'm working on TEE again.
    496: Giving the occasional thought as to what the hell I'll do with this.
    360 Degree Duck: ...While I still like the idea of a big crowd of 360 heroes (basically the Wonderful 101 except since seeing that image on Wikipedia with the circle divided evenly between the RGB colors I've prefered using 360 as the go-to "large number," even if 100 is more common), I'm not sure if I like the idea of the setting. Actually, now that I think about it, in case I come to not really like using this as the "main" incarnation of the 360 groups (mainly the confusing human-witch-demon-ghost setting when any of them except humans can kinda have really broad traits applied to them) I can simply make this shorter than the huge, season-after-season story I originally planned it to be.

    By fic - Unpublished: (Not finished, listed by likely publishing order)

    New Super Dale Gribble U: Doing kind of well, I made it a thing to work a little on this daily. Then I made it to the end of the story and haven't touched it since, waiting a bit before I do the final version.
    Simpsons Meets Brandy and Mr. Whiskers: Started this at the beginning of February and I hoped to finish it by Valentine's Day, basically giving me two weeks to write the entire thing. It helped that the chapters are rather short, especially compared to just about all of my serious works so far and the later installments of SBIG. Like, I think these chapters will be around the length of an average Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals chapter. If merged together they would make a reasonable oneshot, but I think it will help the pacing if I divide them by the locations the characters reach. Ultimately, however, I just kind of stopped on that ever since failing that goal.
    Desert City
    I'd say I'm about... halfway done. At the very least. With the rough draft.
    ...I Thought Those Were the Ingredients: Kind of off to a decent start.
    Act 5 Vs Act 6: Eh... put a little pause on this. I still work on it on occasion though.
    Kids Fight the Zombies: All I have left to write the rough draft of is a little epilogue, but I'm saving that form when I'm done with A5VA6. I mean, this is a spinoff side-story, I want the source work and direct sequel to be done first.
    Soap: Writing steadily but slowly into the first chapter. Because I will be trying to get the first two chapters of this and the first chapter of TBF out before December 12th, all three of said chapters might be a little short by my "seriousfic" standards. 360DD's chapter itself, though, will be longer, since I worked a lot more on it a lot longer ago.
    THE BEST FAMILY: I have almost no plans for this at all aside from being a sort of thing that "builds" from Soap. I have a few concepts floating around, and I did promise myself to get this out before 360DD, but still. Just a few plot points. I am beginning to tie them together though.
    A Slash of Mortality: I do try to work a little on it daily, and I am probably very close to the end of chapter 1's rough, but this probably won't be out for a while. Thinking about it, this might only have... 13 chapters? It's not going to be that long, but as current plans stand it's probably going to be longer than Soap.
    Dave's Hangover: Like SMB&MW, I started this at the beginning of February. Unlike that, the 14th is nowhere near a realistic goal date. It may be a one-shot, but I'll have to do a lot of planning for this (SMBaMW was pretty much thought up already, beginning to end, at least a year before I started writing the file. And I am talking about the new version. All I have to do is find not-cringe-worthy words to put it in.) and even so, it might be longer than the entirety of SMBaMW.
    Everburn: ...Well the beginning's done and the ending part of the first chapter's done but there's a lot of holes in between. Particularlly towards the earlier points. And I don't really like the beginning that much either. I started on the second chapter at least.
    The Real Story
    : Started this 3/26 of 2,013 after I made a bet with myself over a certain fan fic over whether it will do a cliche move. I lost the bet (I would give kudos to the author since the cliche in question (bringing Blaineley into a fan TD season on to have her not do anything and get kicked off first) is highly overused, except that fan fic has a self-insert so blatant and untollerable IMO that it pretty much ruins the story and I'd rather not give publicity negatively to specific fan works. Also I forgot what it was called.), so I have started on this.
    Temples: Let's just say that my lack of progress on this (still at the twisted hallway, look up a playthrough of the OOT Forest Temple and see how early that is) is one of the many, yet more minor, reasons why I prefer Dersecest to Prospitcest. (Oh hey I for once actually like a pairing that is more popular on the fandom than it's "immediate counterpart!" I thought the TD fandom would drive me away from that!) Ironically the point I'm stuck at is supposed to be where John and Jade's progression through the temple as well as the next four temples becomes more original and quicker paced.
    Total Drama Race: Barely started, haven't done much.

    By fic - Unstarted: (Just planned dates on starting, mostly)

    Total Drama Competition Advice:

    This is really more of another list of pet peeves if anything but I don't care.


  • Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever have someone rig the votes. That is extremely lazy writing; basically being a bad plot device. Harold rigging the votes was basically just an excuse, and it should not be something to be repeated in fan fics. (Not only because it had been done before in canon, but because... well... yeah, it's an uncreative and stupid way to get someone voted off. Especially if the rigger is supposed to be the main antagonist, which Harold by the way was not. Mal was, but... well it didn't work anyway and don't most people hate the fifth season?) Also, I'd like to say that just because something happened in the canon of a work I like does not always mean I found it to be a good decision. This is a prime example.
  • Don't make everyone treat interteam dating or friendships as if it were a serious taboo. For Heather, it makes sense, seeing how bossy and how much of a wannabe strategist she is, and maybe it will make sense for Courtney, but for anyone else it's rather out of character. None of the contestants are so paranoid that they think that any human interaction is a sign of an alliance just because they were categorized in by a list/the team captain/the first challenge, that's stupid. And if you think "Well my OC is basically a new Heather so-" please read the first bullet under OC creating "advice."
  • Confessionals should be used for a person's thoughts and/or elaboration on minor events, and not for characters to give out exposition. Remember, it's supposed to be a reality show, and in reality shows we don't hear the contestants' thoughts like we do in most works of fiction because we aren't mind readers. One use of the confessional is to take the place of that. I'm saying this because there were some fics that have the whole show a character's literal thoughts, which is kind of redundant due to the confessionals. And partly because I saw one fic where the reason for elimination came out of nowhere from someone giving a confession literally right before the ceremony itself, which embarassingly happened more than once in the same story I think.
  • Try to plan at least around four eliminations ahead. For seasons with reward challenges, still think in terms of eliminations. This way you can make it easier to develop the characters who will be getting voted off, and could even do what I do and put great focus on them just to kick them off early, effectively making the eliminations surprising. After all, who expects a seemingly main character getting the boot in chapter 7? Out of 26 or 30?
  • Rewrite specific:

  • Don't rehash canon. I know I said this earlier, but I can't say this enough. Rehash means to bring something again without significant altering. And don't have one character do the exact same thing another character did in canon (ex. Cody avoiding getting caught by Chef by hiding under water in "Hide and be Sneaky" when Leshawna did that originally; something I've seen twice so far, though I'm sure one was inspired by the other); that's lazy writing and it's pretty OOC, and personally I think it's even worse than complete unalteration because it shows that even when forced to have something that should lead to a different outcome you redo what had happened as a result of laziness. Say what you will about character development, but the contestants are pretty unique, so them ending up in the exact same situations is unlikley. A good, entertaining rewrite is not one that nickpicks at what will be original while using canon events to fill in the rest. If you want to use the bare-bones idea for a concept, for the love of God please at least plan that the excecution will be different.
  • Don't always make the same teams win as in canon; have the victor be determined based on context and reason, not "well this team was the original winner so they should win here too." It makes the fan fic pretty boring and predictable when we know which team is going to win every time.

  • Original Character Creating "Advice:"

    The word "advice" is written in quotes because for now I'm not sure how this will turn out. Hell, I might even delete this.

    Ok. So first I'm going to define what I think a Mary/Gary Sue is. I have thought that one generally follows some of these traits:

    1. Takes way more spotlight than anyone else, especially if needlessly. Like focusing on their irrelevant shenanigans while the actual plot comes to a grinding halt. This goes moreso if the story is supposed to be on an ensemble, rather than a single hero.
    2. Takes way more importance to the plot than anyone else. Moreso than one would expect from a main character.
    3. Either has no flaw that actually does anything in the long run or has a "flaw" that's only stated when the events in the story contradict it. (IE they randomly trip even though it doesn't matter, "are hard to make friends with" or "shy" but inexplicably befriend the author's favorite characters, or are "dumb" yet end up more savvy than even the characters that are supposed to be savvy.)
    4. Solves almost any and all problems, especially individually. This ties into point 2.

    These traits do not automatically make someone a Sue in my eyes:

    1. Anything unusual but still possible within the fiction's world. (My TZ OC Amy is built around this. Sort of.)
    2. Dressing in fancy/revealing clothing.
    3. Being an author stand-in. (I absolutley hate self-inserts as part of the main cast group, but I'm sure it can be pulled off well. Basically don't make them vehicles to shove your opinion's down the reader's throats, give them reasonable flaws, and everything should be okay.)
    4. Being extremely powerful. As long as they either don't completely trivallize almost everything they face or they are given some reasonable limitations. Let's use Rock Pikmin and Pikmin 2-era Purple Pikmin as a comparason: Rock Pikmin add a bit more variety in combat, where throwing them helps more than charging them or dismissing them, and while they add extra damage it still isn't much to really insta-kill anything more than the basic enemies that any other color can insta-kill. Sure, they're also immune to a number of attacks, but not only do some of them leave them stuck in the ground for a few seconds, but other Pikmin have their immunities. They overall make a few situations helpful but don't break the game open (er... final boss aside, and even that takes effort). Purples, on the other hand, can be used to wipe out anything not in water or the final boss in a matter of seconds, granting a near-win in the game. Just effortlessly chuck a few of them and even some of the larger enemies will be dead, and if they don't die they'll probably be stunned too. They may be hard to get, and slow (and that can be negated with Spicy Spray!), but this isn't really anything to worry about unless you're new to the second game or get caught off guard. Like, the Gattling Groink is the only regular enemy in the game you have to worry about killing them before they kill it. In short, if going for power, write Rock Pikmin, not Purple Pikmin.
    5. Sad backstories. Granted, these can be pretty stupid themselves, but I think that a crappy backstory and a crappy character can be mutually exclusive.

    Basically, it's all about excecution, not concept. Sort of. Pretty much everything is significantly harder to pull off well if it fits the second numbered list above.

    These are some general points I came up with, going by trends I have seen with OCs in various fandoms:

  • I've said things along these lines a lot, so let me put it this way: Don't forget that the "O" in "OC" stands for original.
  • Do not base a character off yourself unless you absolutely, completely know what you're doing! Trust me, this can get messy. And can lead to some pretty bland character types. And personally, I find it to be really uncreative and lazy writing, moreso than using canon characters because it takes no effort to try to guess the OC's actions or fill in the personality if all it takes is to ask yourself "What would I do in that situation?"
  • There is nothing wrong with having OCs period, especially for something like Simpsons where every other episode has a new group of people.
  • I might get some flack for this but there is nothing wrong with pairing an OC with a canon character so long as you are not just using the OC as an excuse to pair up yourself with a character you have a crush on. Some people do this with canon characters as well by derailing them into self-inserts; not too good of an idea either and I find it worse than having an OC do it because at least for the OC you don't have an established character you're ruining. (Or, if the romance is poor, compared to self-inserting instead of self-inserts only one established character is ruined instead of two.)
  • How easy is it to answer if someone asks, "What is the difference between your OC and [canon character]?" Excluding looks, name, and backstory. If their personalities are just about identical, try to tweak them as much as possible to make a more new character. Or use the character that they are a copy of. It's not innovotive or interesting to have an original character who's quirk is that they're a ripoff of an established character from the same series.
  • Characters who exist to mostly fulfil one closed in joke with little room for character development are bad ideas in the case of special groups like Homestuck session players (unless that session in particular is hardly elaborated upon) or Total Drama contestants, where the room for the main cast is limited. Having one or two gimick characters is alright; the entire "gang" consisting of them might make the fan fic something of a repetitive annoyance to read.
  • An original character who'se personality only ammounts to "They really like X and if you insult it to them then they get REALLY MAD AND GRRGBEESGKVAJSGA" is not a well developed character. For that matter, try to use that gimmick sparingly or not at all.
  • I try to base my OCs off basic character types that were not part of the original group.

    Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

    Hunters' Chorus by GinkoToothed reviews
    What ever occurred between the Monster and the Huntress after the attack on the Adler? A relationship exploration of sorts. Manga-verse; takes place during Alucard's voyage to London. Alucard/Rip.
    Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,901 - Reviews: 68 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 62 - Updated: 1/29 - Published: 11/21/2009 - Alucard, Rip Van Winkle - Complete
    Total Drama Action Redux by Lord Akiyama reviews
    An alternate universe story based around my idea of how the series would have gone. - Chapter Ten: Full Metal Drama
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 112,298 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 12/9/2012 - Published: 9/12/2010
    Total Alternate Island by Jason Kreuger Myers reviews
    We all know what happened 1st season, but what if 6 more campers and 4 sibling interns were added to the fray. Couples both fanon and canon. Dedicated to my idols Kobold Necromancer and Winter Rae
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 86 - Words: 396,622 - Reviews: 311 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 36 - Updated: 2/6/2012 - Published: 5/11/2009 - Complete
    Total Drama Alternate Tour by tigerty reviews
    What if Duncan hadn't quit? What if Ezekiel had a second chance? What if Bridgette didn't get stuck to a pole? It's yet another season 3 rewrite.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 64,437 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 1/1/2012 - Published: 9/19/2010
    Total Drama: OC Parody by Ritzy1 reviews
    Send in Mary and Gary Sues, with no faults whatsoever! Send me your bubbly and popular yet sarcastic and loyal cheerleaders. Send me an exact copy of Duncan, Gwen or Courtney except with different names! The sky is the limit.
    Total Drama series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 325 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/12/2011
    TDWT: Reducks Redux by The Kobold Necromancer reviews
    In this requested redux of TDWT, things are quite different and more insane! Currently in Yukon, where the ship teasing heats up the frozen zone! But how much tease can you take? How much cold can they hold up to? Get ready, because it's sledding time!
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 85,986 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 66 - Updated: 3/23/2011 - Published: 10/5/2010 - Lindsay, Chef Hatchet
    Total Drama Comeback by The Kobold Necromancer reviews
    The original 22 contestants return to Wawanakwa for a second season, almost straight after the first. Who will win? What new friendships and love interests will form? Will Heather endure, can Ezekiel survive, and will Izzy find the elusive jellybean smuggler? Completed, official pairings and more.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 53 - Words: 375,353 - Reviews: 1867 - Favs: 554 - Follows: 173 - Updated: 2/10/2009 - Published: 9/4/2008 - Chris M., Izzy, Bridgette, Ezekiel - Complete
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    Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals
    Part of the "SBIG" series. It's a stupid, deliberatley badly written thing I made in a spinoff to another also deliberatley badly written fan fic I wrote before. Main plot's about the kids and trolls fighting the Felt, but the majority of the fan fic involves a bunch of sidequests with the citizens. Completed.
    Homestuck - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 26 - Words: 305,439 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 9/13 - Published: 9/13/2012 - [John E., Jade H.] Nepeta L. - Complete
    Gumball Vs Satan reviews
    Part of the "SBIG" series. It's a stupid parody thing that's intentionally badly written. I'd suggest to ignore this if you don't like deliberately badly done fan fiction. Actual story is where the Devil himself has some problems and Elmore Jr. High gets caught up in it, before the story quickly turns into something even more... out-there. Now edited to clear up "typoes."
    Amazing World of Gumball - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 16,921 - Reviews: 2 - Updated: 8/31 - Published: 10/30/2013 - Gumball W., Darwin W., Carrie, OC - Complete
    Zombie Attack!
    Repost and remake of this really old thing I did years ago. Part of the "SBIG" series. An intentionally badly written short story about Edd fighting zombies.
    Ed, Edd n Eddy - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,484 - Published: 8/31 - Edd - Complete
    The Eds' EDventure reviews
    Part of the "SBIG" series, an old intentionally poorly written fan fic made for total fun. Now a bit of an old shame, if you ask me... UPDATE: Finally, truly finished.
    Ed, Edd n Eddy - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 4,007 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 8/31 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Eds - Complete
    496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems reviews
    Basically I took the "make short ficlets of every combination of characters" meme on AO3, set them all in the same story, and added loads of polygamy to it. The eight humans and twenty-four trolls are all stuck on a meteor, and thanks to a certain Most Impurrtant Character they eventually all end up dating eachother.
    Homestuck - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 11 - Words: 33,320 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 2/14 - Published: 2/14/2013 - Meulin L.
    The Hair Idealization
    Crossover with the weird [adult swim] show Perfect Hair Forever and a challenge to myself. A short, surreal oneshot that doesn't take itself too seriously and kind of based on "The Sweaters" from the Amazing World of Gumball, where Leonard finds himself having to challenge Gerald and Brenda in a series of trials. Thankfully, Penny helps him out.
    Crossover - Misc. Cartoons & Big Bang Theory - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,109 - Published: 12/31/2014 - Leonard H., Penny - Complete
    Part of the "SBIG" series. Just a collection of several stories that are intentionally badly written, in an attempt at comedy. The fics can be about anything I feel like writing about, or even be sequels/spinoff/prequel chapters to existing installments. And even have sequels. Just about anything goes.
    X-overs - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,180 - Published: 12/29/2014
    Total Zeksmit Plains reviews
    Alternate Universe not related to the canon series, with small fantasy elements. Ezekiel, after winning a challenge by Chris, uses his money to host a show of his own starring eleven rather familiar girls as they compete in the wild prairies of Zekitunakwa. Day 8: The mystery of "Homer" revealed!
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 109,859 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 10/30/2014 - Published: 10/3/2011 - Justin, Ezekiel
    Hecksing: The Dawn
    Part of the SBIG series. A prequel to the intentionally badly written "Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals", focused on... "the past", sort of. Alucard, Walter, and Integra go on several missions spanning through the contemporary era, fighting a number of evil organizations led by the former's evil brother. Completed.
    Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 6 - Words: 39,759 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 9/19/2014 - Published: 6/11/2014 - Alucard, Integra, Walter, Rip Van Winkle
    Carl Stevens Universe reviews
    Nearly three years after an obnoxious Parody Stu somehow became the leader of Hellsing and got Rip and Seras on his side, the three move to Beach City. Problem is that, unlike London, the Stu isn't so welcomed and soon the Crystal Gems have to do something a little... silly to deal with them. Kind of a huge crack fic...
    Crossover - Hellsing & Steven Universe - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 23,744 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 12/18/2013 - [OC, Rip Van Winkle] Amethyst, Steven U. - Complete
    Movie Day reviews
    The twelve kids race to a distant but popular vacation city in time to see a movie that will only premiere at that city until after three weeks. This fan fic is really more of a test than anything.
    Ed, Edd n Eddy - Rated: K - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,976 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/16/2012 - Ed, Eddy
    Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals reviews
    Part of the "SBIG" series. It's a stupid parody of the OVAs/manga before later chapters get more "original." I'd advise to ignore this if you don't like fan fics written bad on purpose. Completed, and my first fan fic to be so. Edit: And now touched up a little. The old version will be on the fan fiction wiki.
    Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 30,111 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 4/13/2012 - Published: 9/13/2011 - [Seras, Rip Van Winkle, OC] - Complete
    Total Drama World Tour Rewrite reviews
    Remade from the ground up from an older version! My attempt at this. All 24 contestants are competing, with a certain unnexpected someone being the villain. Fans of canon pairings... be cautious.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 21,377 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 5/13/2011 - Published: 4/1/2011 - Chris M., Chef Hatchet