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Poll: Who do you think is Courtney's boyfriend in TZP? Hint: There ARE clues, but they're vague and don't point to one single person. Vote Now!
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Joined 04-11-09, id: 1897388, Profile Updated: 03-26-14
Author has written 9 stories for Ed, Edd n Eddy, Total Drama series, Hellsing, Homestuck, Amazing World of Gumball, and Steven Universe.

Good afternoon.

I have written some info on my TV Tropes and Wikipedia pages. This page is going to be for my fan fiction stuff, while I plan on remaking the other two to be more of a typical user page. I have (mostly) already done this with my TV Tropes page. But those two pages aren't completely useless! I have two "Unpublished Works" pages for my fan fics on TV Tropes and a trope page for TZP, and I do have a tiny bit of (very spoilery, but it's mostly SBIG and stuff) information on my Wikipedia sandbox.

Quick note: There seems to be a glitch where viewing this profile under the "permanent name" url will underline everything after the first bullet list. I think this happens with all bullet lists. Or bullet lists with links in them.

Speaking of plural pages: Quick links to TV Tropes pages (in order of the fic's creation date):

  • General SBIG (Also has trope lists for Eds' EDventure, Zombie Attack!, Shelding and Lenard Tock About Fysicks, Kids Fit the Trolls, and Gumball Vs Satan)
  • Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals
  • Total ZeksmitPlains (And the rest of the series, for future seasons)
  • Sweet Jade and Hella John
  • Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals
  • 496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems (Can't externally link this one for some reason; it's here:
  • Carl Stevens Universe
  • HUC, SJAHJ, and CSU also have their own character sheets. HHC is planned ot have one too at the start of season five, and TZP will have one once its first season is finished. (It's pretty hard to talk about the characters without being tempted to give away their eliminations and plot roles, both of which are things I'd like to keep zip-lipped about.)

    I accept criticism as long as the points brought up make sense. Mindless bashing I don't like. Although, if you do bring up something you don't like, chances are I'm well aware of that flaw but never actually get to working on it. (TZP fails with Bridgette and Gwen's characters, can't really find its genre quite yet, and Ezekiel's character seems to fluctuate between calm, planned host and terrible ameatur, for example, and that's of one of my favorite fan fics.) I also plan on critiquing other fan fics through reviews. Mostly ones with glaring flaws.

    I used to mainly go through the Total Drama fandom and look around for competitions. Except app stories, yet I'm trying to get into them. Now I just browse around for anything in the event that I may find a story with a premise that catches me in. So far I haven't found too much luck, but it might be because I'm a pretty picky reader.

    I don't review often, but I will respond to almost any review to me. Here's a guide:

    - The comments to the review will be at the bottom of the most recent chapter (even if the review is directed at an earlier chapter), between the footnotes and the closing AN.
    - I will not comment on redundant reviews, even if they are written by different people.
    - Bewarned that I could go off topic on my comment, so don't expect a direct response.

    This profile is still under construction. One reason being is that I plan on adding sections for every fan fic series I'm working on.

    Note to Total Drama writers: (Or maybe, but I hope it doesn't come to this, writers of other fandoms) if you're thinking about making your first competition one where other people submitts their characters, you might want to think again. Not only are these against the site rules (I think), but half of them never go anywhere and I believe that you should practace trying to characterize either canon characters or your own OCs before taking on this concept. I'm not saying I completely discourage the idea, but the sheer ammount of these plus the general quality of most of them (several of them never even get enough apps. Take that as a warning sign) makes me want to put a warning like this out there.

    Profile as of 3/26/2,014 (If the "profile updated" says otherwise, it probably just means that I only made a quick update. Quick enough for me to forget about this.)

    If/when 496's first ten pairing chapters are done, there will be a poll asking which CHAPTER you thought was the best. Not which pairing you think is better out of the 10, which CHAPTER did you like. This will be a blind poll that will last from the updated publishing pairing 10 to following update. This will repeat for the next groups of ten, with the ending date for the final six couples being fifteen days after the epilogue is out. After this, there will be a new poll (blind again, will end after I publish two more chapters of any work; the chapters don't even have to be of the same work) taking the top result from each of the fifty polls and asking which out of them did you like the most. The winner of that shall be declaired 496's OTP, which means that I may do something with that. Like write a mid-length fan fic with it was its center pairing. (By the way I can tell if people are cheating and have only read this and are simply voting for the pairing they like so they can see it. In fact, I'll even make the chapters for the 'popular' pairings really crappy. If people are voting the chapter based on what pairing it had and not how it was written I'll simply take whatever premise I'm thinking of and write a Tavros/Vriska fan fic with it.) Please note that if any of the first fifty polls do not get any votes, I won't do this. I have not yet fully decided what to do if any of the polls have a tie.

    FAVORITE works of fiction (In order to gaining interest): Mario series, Pikmin series, Total Drama, Adventure Time, Homestuck. (I don't know so much about the latter anymore, I think its slightly starting to go downhill.) Things I only have a mild interest in aren't here, but instead on...

    Other things I like (In no real order): [Will complete] Sonic games (though I have not really gotten any of the recent games; not that I believe in the negative reviews or anything, it's just that I've never been that interested in getting them), Ed, Edd n Eddy, recently taking up interest in Steven Universe (And I'm making this my "failsafe next fandom" in case Homestuck's ending flops and I lose interest in the HS fan fic ideas that I never got to write (I already did with Total Drama, with TDWTR, TZ, Total Drama Race, and maybe the Rewrite Trilogy being the only things I still consider now), because again I am losing interest in that at supersonic rates. My dissapointment could shatter windows).

    "I'll get to trying this out" list: Phineas and Ferb, Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, I guess just about almost everything that's been mentioned in SBIG except for the stuff like Halo and Ren and Stimpy.

    "Get that thing away from my face!" list: Modern Simpsons (I have very, very rarely laughed at the entire show's - regardless of season - humor. However, the older episodes used to have heartwarming and interesting moments that I really liked. Now though, they've dropped the more human aspects of the show in favor of being "wacky" and "recent" with the only real attempts at being emotional being Homer and Marge reconciling for the umpteenth time, and as a result I think the whole show just became an earsore.)

    Fan Fiction Stats:

    Published/Working on: ("Top priority" means it's currently the project I'm focusing most on.)

  • The Eds' EDventure [ON HIATUS] -- Part of the "SBIG" (Pronounced... well, "Sbig." As one word.) series. Random parody thing.
  • * Intermissions/"SBIGtermissions" [WRITING ON HIATUS (A)] -- Kids from Homestuck (mainly John and Jade) screwing around, part of the SBIG series. Getting stranded on islands, robing banks, fighting characters from a live-action sitcom, watching Ed, Edd n Eddy; that kind of stuff. Two of them will be within the above work, there might be a third one hidden within a secret work. Chronologically the idea was between TZ series and SJAHJ, but that doesn't really matter much since these are organized by publish date.
  • Zombie Attack![COMPLETED? REMAKE COMING SOON] -- Part of the "SBIG" series. Edd from EENE versus zombies. Originally a 'short' story as part of a TV Tropes thing. Also contains the second SBIGtermission, if I DO the intermissions. NOTE: The original story was deleted (as part of the entire badfic TV Tropes thread it was on) and, unless there's some archive site I'm not really aware of, it's not around for actual viewing. However, a while ago I saved up both the original text (TVT formatting and all), and put it on my user page on the fanfiction wiki. (It was going to be on its own page, but I chickened out.) I do plan on posting a remake of this as its own short story. This will probably be around the time I finally put TEE off hiatus. Remake thing aside, there's another, more spoilery reason as to why this is given a questionmark after the "COMPLETED." Anyway, the fic can be viewed here.
  • Total Drama World Tour Rewrite["On hiatus" (A)/REMADE] -- As the name implies, a fix fic of Total Drama's third season with Ezekiel as the villain and a Harold-centric harem.
  • Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals[COMPLETED] -- A bad fic/parody of the Hellsing OVAs, part of the SBIG series. It starts off with the exact same plot as canon but then things get... weird. Has a spinoff Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals, see below, and pseudo-sequel Carl Stevens Universe, also see below.
  • Total Zeksmit Plains[IN PROGRESS] -- Details about the fan fic and the related series posted below.
  • Sweet Jade and Hella John[COMPLETED] -- Surreal parody thing inspired by Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff and Problem Sleuth. Part of the SBIG series. Basically the spiritual successor to Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. Offsite, thread is here and the mirror is here.
  • Onionstuck[ON HIATUS (A)] -- Pikmin SBURB session. I'll try to stay true to Pikmin's themes here, and the focus will really be more on the Pikmin themselves than on the session. Offsite, thread is here and the mirror is here.
  • Movie Day[IN PROGRESS... barely] -- This is an Ed, Edd n Eddy fan fic about the kids trying to cross a long distance in order to get to a hot vacation spot, but before a highly-hyped movie premiers there (and only there, until after several weeks) and they end up missing it. This was originally supposed to be my first "serious" fic after writing several SBIG installments, although that has since changed. It is, however, my first "adventure" fan fic, which will pave the road for others. (See below.)
  • Sheldin And Lenard Tock About Fysicks [ON HIATUS] -- Comedic Big Bang Theory comic, part of the SBIG series.
  • Kids Fit the Trolls[COMPLETED, DIRECT SEQUEL PLANNED] -- Homestuck short story that's also part of the SBIG series. Originally this was just the Kids Fit series, with the sequel possibly titled Kids Fit Post Scratch with two more titled Kids Fit the More Trolls and Kids Fit the Cals. However, I'm thinking of just "merging" the three opposing groups together in one slightly bigger story called Act 5 Vs Act 6, since otherwise it would be a little too formuletic for my tastes.
  • Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals[WORKING, TOP PRIORITY] -- Part of the SBIG series and takes place in the same universe as Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. Shows the series from the Homestuck character's point of view, which reveals a LOT of stuff unseen in HUC, mainly because I haven't planned HHC when I was writing any of HUC. It explains stuff such as what happened to Dracula and why the hell John and Jade were in the jury in chapter 9 even though it's in a completely different country, but a lot of this doesn't come until much later in the fan fic. Way less plot-heavy than SJAHJ and, while the overall plot is about the kids and trolls fighting the Felt, several chapters will focus on the side world because I didn't really like how "Hecksing Vs Millennium" took up the entire plot in HUC.
  • 496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems[IN PROGRESS] -- Homestuck fan fic where the eight humans and twenty-four trolls are stuck on a six year trip (not that exact ammount, but I'll get to that) across the furthest ring because of some obnoxious "tag-along" troll ("Bororo Sierda" -- each word being a corruption of "bull" and "shit," but lengthed to fit the 6/6 naming and with the first letters changed to be the initials of bullshit.) mucking up the A1 session and screwing things up from there. Plus Meenah getting a little over confident and deciding to scratch the session instead of giving anyone the chance to actually finish. The title comes from how this is actually going to be a romance fan fic, which each chapter being a short hooking up one of the four hundred and ninty six pairing combinations. And yes, the back story is supposed to be stupid. Oh, and it has dreamselves.
  • Gumball Vs Satan[ON "SHORT" HIATUS] -- Gumball Watterson is now the newest face to the SBIG series. Well, in terms of his show being the star of a story, because general newcomers has been given to the people who debuted in the latest HHC update now. An Amazing World of Gumball fan fic where a war breaks out because the devil, who goes by the name Omarn Scratch, has a broken ladder, and for some reason his daughter Elisa thinks that it's best to use Gumball's leg bone to fix it. Loosley inspired by Conker's Bad Fur Day.
  • Carl Stevens Universe [COMPLETED] -- This would have been my first one-shot, but seeing as it was even longer than 496's prologue, it got split into a twoshot where both chapters were out on the same day. It was however my first fic that directly involves another fic. In this case, it's a crossover between Steven Universe and the above Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. The surviving members of Hecksing (now renamed back into Hellsing) from the end of HUC, now portrayed a lot closer to their actual depictions, move into Beach City. However, they quickly get into a few issues with the Crystal Gems, which cumulates into a paintball game with extremely high stakes to determine which gang of heroes gets to stay in Beach City. Not part of the "SBIG" series.
  • Simpsons Meet Brandy and Mr. Whiskers[WORKING] -- A remake of one of the first story ideas I had, when I was around seven or eight. Based on when I thought the Simpsons crashed in the Amazon at the end of "Blame it on Lisa," I had written what they met with Brandy and Mr. Whiskers and then... well, things quickly took a turn for the strange. If anything it was even stranger in the original planning then it will be in this redo, because the remake will be eliminating one crossover and "relocating" things a bit to make more sense.
  • Desert City [WORKING] -- Steven Universe oneshot (hopefully this time it will be a one-shot) where, during a battle with a dimension-hopping bat creature, Steven gets sent into a parallel world. Beach City's counterpart is what this story is named after. The majority of this is about Steven looking around the rather grim world Desert City is in, and figuring out why everything is so vastly different from his world, and learn about everyone's Desert counterpart. Just a head's up: The bat thing will die shortly after Steven enters the alternate world. It's not about the Gems trying to beat it, but instead the Gems trying to restore the alternate universe and get back to their homes.
  • ...I Thought Those Were the Ingredients [WORKING] -- Steven Universe... also maybe oneshot but long one, and a more surreal one about Steven setting up a five-person band against this pair of giants while Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl are nine days away from Beach City. They eventually return, but by that point things get pretty... complicated. Also this is planned to be my first non-SBIG work to look like it's connecting with my other works. So things will get kind of confusing there.
  • The Hill King [WORKING] -- King of the Hill crack fics. Hank is married to a (relitively) less violent Rip from Hellsing, and while Bobby turned out mostly the same but he's half-vampire. They do stuff, along with the other alley guys of course. Originally wasn't going to have continuity and instead be more like Total Zeksmit Side Stories or OT32 Shenanigans where the chapters could be read in any order, but... I decided to screw that.
  • In the Flesh series[WORKING ON HOMESTUCK AND KING OF THE HILL INSTALLMENTS. STARTED TOTAL DRAMA ONE] -- Pending title, but I'm likely to go with this. Basically just a challenge to write K-rated stories that also involve nudism in some way. There will at least be Homestuck and King of the Hill stories, and at least for their cases the crack-ness of the plot itself is inversely proportional to the oddity of the original fiction (the HS one being mostly normal while the KOTH one is borderline surreal). These will basically be, like, one per each fandom I already write in, so don't expect one for a fandom unless I already wrote something in it. Other possibilities, in order from more likely to least, include Steven Universe (which, as ashamed as I am to say, will involve the titular setting from Desert City above and will even be a direct sequel to it), Total Drama and hell maybe even Big Bang Theory and Ed, Edd n Eddy. (Sitting naked in a wagon may finally get a chance to be cool.) Hellsing ain't gonna be a thing unless Carl was involved somehow. The nudism won't be completely played for laughs like in SBIG, it's not played all that seriously either. And speaking of SBIG, one of my biggest reasons for making this is that SBIG kind of took a crap on nudism and I don't like that.
  • * King of the Hill -- Hank steps into an alternate dimension where clothing is only considered when the environment calls for it. With the help of alternate Dale and Hank's own counterpart, he tries to get back through an inter-dimensional portal. Then the portal frees an abomination, and things naturally go bad.
  • * Homestuck -- John, Jake, Dave, and Dirk take a vacation trip to the island (Earth is made of several tiny islands each no bigger than Austrailia in this verse; I'm not sure if there will be a reason for this) their girlfriends (try to figure it out) are on and are forced to learn nudist costumes. They picked a bad time for this, as Jade's rival, a jerk nudist surfer named Joey, sets out to ruin their relationships and tries to shut down the research center Jade works at.
  • * Total Drama -- Terror strikes Playa Des Losers (of an AU) when Izzy and Owen go around with a clothes disintegrator. They think they're the good guys. Or at least, Owen does.
  • * Steven Universe -- very little is decided on this aside from how it will use the alternate world from Desert City again and it might bring focus back on the Crystal Gems, for the first time since CSU.
  • Dave's Hangover[WORKING] -- I feel pretty uncomfterable discussing this thanks to the beginning... well... a little Homestuck crackfic that I decided to suddenly start jotting down, Dave (aged up as with the other kid/troll characters, keep this in mind) waking up with no memory of what happened in the last three days and he's stuck in Hawaii. The uncomfterableness comes from how he's naked in bed along with the trolls (A1, A2, and A2 ancestors. I'll leave the A1 ancestors out just for once like in SJAHJ, but I may revise this later after something on them is revealed) and Hank Hill (Hank leaves early on but spoilers he's important to the plot), and they have to get from Hawaii back to Texas while figuring out what's going on (the trolls remembered the events, but Dave spent most of them away from them so he has to rely on finding other people to fill in) and being attacked by monsters. First time I'll use Aradiabot! And this may be my first M-rated story, but it's only really the beginning that bumps this up and that's nothing worse than what was shown in Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals. But it isn't SBIG and these characters were originally kids so that's why it's such a gray area for me.
  • Act 5 Vs Act 6 [WORKING] -- Sequel to Kids Fit the Trolls, part of the SBIG series. The original kids and trolls find an island and get into a quick conflict with the newer kids, newer trolls, and the Cherubim. Basically the bare-bones plot is a ripoff of Sonic 3 and Knuckles, except with the usual twists I try to give these kind of stories. It will have the same "chapter"-ish formula as KFTT, where the storyline is cut into seven short chapters of varrying length.
  • The Homestuck Thanksgiving Special, except not as its "real title" is Kids Fight the Zombies [WORKING] -- Part of the SBIG series and a sort of "tack-on" to Act 5 Vs Act 6. Despite being planned to be out in the same post as A5VA6, this story is completely unrelated and focused on the eight humans (only one troll has any kind of appearance here and it's kind of a... "let down") fighting against zombies before things get... complicated. And weird. It will also have the same "seven short chapters" formatting KFTT and A5VA6 did. This story also has Joey, except he's not a nudist anymore, the fact that he's a parody of fan characters and his concept is Carl on steroids is more obvious, and he's called a douchebag instead of a jerk because it's this kind of story and ITFHS is that kind of story.
  • OT32 Shenanigans [WORKING ON THREE CHAPTERS] -- Basically this is to 496 Reasons as Total Zeksmit Side Stories (see below) is to Total Zeksmit. Almost always taking place on Earth with the trolls humanized, this is a Homestuck collection of crack fics where the eight humans and twenty-four trolls are (usually) already married in a big polygamous clusterscrew and they do stuff like fighting a hydra, getting stranded on an island that turns out to be a portal to Hell, and dealing with eachother's families (whom are planned to be sneek-peeks at alter egoes present in 496, for the most part). The key difference between this and TZSS is that the stories here are kinda supposed to work more with the OT32 specifically being an OT32, and for some reason or another wouldn't be as appropriate with the TZ cast. But this and TZSS are both places to dumb off my "unused" ideas. These were originally going to be seperate one-shot stories before I thought it would be more convenient for everyone if I just lump them all together, and make an "introductory" chapter that adds a little story of the four groups of players meeting up together and later getting married and stuff.
  • Homestuck Rewrite[WORKING] -- Homestuck "remake" intended to be plagued with bad writing but not a SBIG fic. By bad writing I mean that I intend to take all of my writing flaws and exaggerate them to ungodly levels. This is mostly a parody of Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, complete with glasses-guy (John in this case) having an unwanted harem of exactly eight. (Mild spoilers: Take the A2, B1, and B2 girls. Now remove Aradia and Vriska. (If you expected me to say "Remove Jade and Jane" then you don't know me enough.) Why them? Well, Vriska just to see if I can piss people off to be honest, and Aradia... I don't remember how I came up with that, but seeing Vriska it was likely an exclusionary thing. Like "If they're part of the harem they won't die; I like killing off Aradia because I think it's funny, goodbye." It could be that the remaining troll girls, Nepeta, Kanaya, Terezi, and Feferi, were all patrons in SJAHJ/496, but... eh...) The fact that this is to be an intended parody will not be said in the fic itself until the ending so congrats, by slogging through my profile you are rewarded with this fan fic's secret before the first chapter is even out. I also plan to launch a Tumblr before I get the first chapter out so I can announce that it's a parody there too just before getting it out, and thus have an archived reference in case anyone thinks I'm making that up to try to cover the bad writing.
  • Oedipal Rhymes[EH... I KINDA STOPPED ON THAT FOR NOW, BUT I WOULDN'T SAY IT'S ON HIATUS] -- This thing arose from that How I Met Your Mother episode told completely in rhymes, and it may also turn out to be one of the primary works mocked in Homestuck Rewrite alongside... well, to give a hint, it's published and its title also ends in "Rewrite." This is a collection of six-lined Homestuck rhymes (I wouldn't call them poems, per say) detailing three-sided relationships out of a grander four-sided relationship pair, one of the Prospit guys and another of the Derse guys. It'll... make more sense when I get it out. Or just find a better way to summarize this. This is more of a short filler project if anything.
  • Everburn[WORKING] -- My first attempt at doing an unironic mass crossover. King of the Hill centered fan fic where Bobby and many, many others have to work to saving the world after Johnny Test gets a magic gun called the Permafrost that, for a reason explained later on, turned him evil when he went into a seven-year "spiritual journey" (it's kind of like after Link pulls out the Master Sword for the first time in Ocarina of Time, except instead of a coma the person has to do a difficult series of tests). The fan fic itself is named after Permafrost's "counterpart," Everburn. Maybe the first time I (officially, I have leaked some info about it on TV Trope's sandboxes before) announced a fan fic after I actually started writing it! For once while writing this, I will not try to obsess over continuity or try to make it really serious and structured, but instead just write the storyline and see where it goes from there. Or not, because thinking about it a little I can see some very mild potential in this and I don't want it to go to waste...
  • SBIGlets[WORKING ON THE BELOW THREE STORIES] -- SBIG stories that aren't really long/complicated enough to go as their own story. While I have about a dosen ideas, the only three I am currently working on are:
  • * 5word -- Legend of Zelda story with Link splitting into five people. Ocarina of Time "remake" thing.
  • * Dream House -- Mass crossover, first fic where there isn't a real "full" story taking the lead out of crossover. Dr. House (House) loses memory of something one of his patients had, he gets help of an Dom Cobb's (Inception) new extraction team: Adam, Jamie (both Mythbusters) and Madotsuki (Yume Nikki). However, a certain monochrome phantom ends up invading the dream chain, causing a bit of a wreck...
  • * Gym Class -- Homestuck high school AU where John, Jade, Jane, and Jake quickly end up naked and half to take a long route back home. However, when the CIA gets involved, can this fearsome four take down a certain potential threat to the United States?
  • Crackcest Decathalon[STATUS VARIES BY FIC] -- A set of ten lighthearted, silly (but not deliberatly badly done) Homestuck crack fics, each of them focused around an ectobiological incest pairing with the humans. All AU, they are divided into three universes. (John/Jade and Dave/Rose in U1; John/Jane, Jade/Jake, Dave/Dirk, and Rose/Roxy in U2; John/Jake, Jade/Jane, Rose/Dirk, and Dave/Roxy in U3; Jane and Jake are not related and neither are Roxy and Dirk, if you don't believe me and think that there's going to be a post-scratch ectobiology session in the B2 session then go read Act 6 Intermission 2.)
  • * John/Jade: Temples[WORKING... sort of] -- I was keeping the title and plot a secret but then 2012 was ending so I gave it away as a New-Year's Eve special. Pseudo crossover where John and Jade go through the temples from Ocarina of Time. Say it sounds stupid, but I challenged myself to go through with this idea no matter how dumb it may seem.
  • * Rose/Dave: Attack of the Killer Time Beetles![WORKING... sort of] -- I was also keeping the plot and title a secret until publish, but again New Year's Eve special so... yeah. Dave and Rose get sent to the past and have to kill these giant bug things, the titular Time Beetles. They must also unite Dave's parents in a paradox to ensure Dave's birth.
  • * John/Jane: A World Tour (That's Better than the Other World Tour I Once Wrote) -- Jane and Jade's house (they're the siblings in this AU; the kids relation goes by their chumhandle initials) is fumigated after an absolutley awful roach infestation. Unfortunately, Jane ends up in the house after it's filled with gasses. John has to rescue her, and after that the two of them see a mysterious hot air balloon that says they have the option to take a trip around the world, but it must be in 40 days "or else." The mafia gets involved.
  • * Jade/Jake: Code Milky Green(: How Getting a House Fumigated Saved an Alien Planet) -- Meanwhile, Jade is looking for a way to kill some time, but ends up stuck with Jake. (A running gag in all three of the Jade fics is that she's stuck adventuring with someone, and it's usually the last person she thinks about.) They soon get lost in the woods, and soon encounter a weird alien race (not the trolls) that is in danger.
  • * Dave/Dirk: Stridercest Vs Birdmen -- I don't think this one needs any clairification. Actually, I do. Dirk's house is repeatedly attacked by a bizarre bird-like monster, so he gets Dave to help find out how the hell the thing is supposed to be killed.
  • * Rose/Roxy: Total Drama Is- Wait... -- While Dirk eventually ended up with Dave as his only sidekick in the above mentioned fan fic, he also tried to take Rose and Roxy, but an attack by the mafia left them stranded on an island. Just why is the mafia after a group of eight kids?
  • * John/Jake: Crystal Clear -- Involves spellunking in some way.
  • * Jade/Jane: TBD.
  • * Rose/Dirk: TBD.
  • * Dave/Roxy: Hotel HAUNTED! -- Dave and Roxy have to stay at a hotel. However, it turns out (surprise surprise) the hotel is haunted. Almost every single horror cliche in the book ensues, as well as plain silly stuff that doesn't even make the least bit of sense.
  • SIMPSONS[WRITING ON HIATUS(A)] -- Simpsons parody involving some of the modern episodes (and maybe even some of the older ones) and "corrupting" them. Or at least, that's how it starts. It later becomes a surreal story about a three-sided war, and that's all I'm going to say without spoiling it.
  • That's So Cliche[WRITING ON HIATUS (A)] -- Parody of Total Drama fanon cliches before shortly decending into madness.
  • Ed, Edd n Eddy's Awesome Edventures[WRITING ON HIATUS, CAN'T GET IT TO WORK] -- Details about this posted below.
  • Soap: The Lost Element [WRITING ON "SHORT" HIATUS] -- Adventure themed original fiction. A boy, two girls, and a humanoid abomination do stuff. Will be offsite, on fictionpress.
  • The Real Story[WRITING ON "SHORT" HIATUS] -- Title pending, Squirrel Boy fan fic with an odd and slightly complicated plot. Details also pending, but it draws some inspiration from Mario games (mainly RPGs and Galaxy games.) Adventure/drama themed.
  • Future/Possible: (In order of likelyness)

  • Total Drama Race -- Short Total Drama fan season taking place in place of World Tour, where Chris brings back the original 22 one last time and puts them into eleven teams of twelve for them to race around the world. Will start about... well, it was originally about halfway through Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, but considering how slowly I'm working on that, it's now halfway through Total Zeksmit Plains. Or... whichever comes first. See "Plans" below for specifics.
  • This Story is Sexist! -- Another Fictionpress story, based on a video game idea that keeps popping into my head. Comedy-attempt about an overly dramatic superhero's life, with his hundreds of demon friends (one of which being his roommate, the other 359 living in the game giant apartment building as him), his trusty mechanized bike with an AI, and naked witch rival. While this will never truly take itself seriously (look at the title, which isn't going to be accurate after the first chapter unless you grasp at straws), I'd at the very least plan some changes to the story's formula later on becuase I don't like preserving the status quo for the sake of preserving the status quo. It's also sometimes focused on trying to avoid and comment on various cliches or just elements I don't like, in opposition to playing them completely straight and having the characters pointing out that it's stupid.
  • naruto the guy with the ninja -- Naruto SBIG story, sort of a rewrite starting from the beginning. Uh... saying anything more would really spoil a big twist near the beginning. Becides the fact that the all-lower-case-titling is intentional.
  • The Swyyx Project -- Title pending, it's an original fiction MS Paint Fan Adventure about this alien called Eoflit Swyyx who had just turned of age where it is tradition to move away from her parent's home and find one of her own. Unfortunately, the planet's wildlife is far beyond hostile, and there's groups of near-unkillable criminals from yet another planet, but that planet and Eoflit's are within the same solar system. I have pondered making a game out of this, for several years down the line.
  • Rewrite Trilogy -- Total Drama fix fics not really related to TDWTR. It consists of a rewrite of Island, a mini-season in between (possibly not), Action with different characters and three teams, and a new season with OCs, possibly one in space called Galaxy. First Galaxy was an idea I quickly made up to avoid having to write the then-titled "Total Drama: the Musical," but now I'm having a hard time going against it. I mean, I don't know about you, but a Super Mario Galaxy-esque season sounds awesome.
  • * Island: Simple redux of the first season. Was originally going to keep the team losses the same, but I read a few fan fics that did that and thought the idea made the fan fic really predictable and boring, so I'm not doing that. It's planned to give development to characters who have been neglected by fanon - particularly those who I haven't tried giving development to in TZP - regardless of my opinion on them. (Owen, DJ, Justin, etc.)
  • * Action: There's three teams now. Seven people are still out, but it's a different set of seven people.
  • * Galaxy: A few (Not sure of the exact number yet; it was originally 16 plus Sierra and Alejandro) new contestants join the old cast and they all go out in space. Challenge take place on different planets. Here's the part where the fan fic becomes complete crack. ...Which is just the way I like it.
  • Homeredux -- A second Homestuck remake thing; except not really. It's more like Sweet Jade and Hella John taken seriously and minus most of the arcs that involves crossover, and set in HS's original universe. (Or rather, an alternate version therof.) Specifically based on Act 2's storyline, though elements from the Mario Intermission may seep in (As for Act 3... very unlikely). While I have not started writing this yet, I currently have a rather in-depth outline of the story's events. Part of the goal of this is to encourage more "alternate sessions" AUs that don't use "swaps" for the base of the change. EDIT: WOW thinking back a serious SJAHJ is an extremely bad idea, and just for that and a few other ideas I had about it, this has moved down a few places on the Likelihood List. Like, the bottom right before the gigantic span.
  • Ezekiel -- Total Drama crack fic starring the titular character. Adventure themed. Might not do this.
  • PDL Cronicals -- Another Total Drama fan fic, centered around people in Playa Des Losers with some rather usual plots going on. AU most of the time. (...I don't like Ezekiel's elimination. That's why the reason was changed in TDWTR.) Might not do this.
  • Owned -- Either a complete AU or a "season between Island and Action" hosted by Blaineley. If I do this, it might involve being able to pick who gets voted off through interactivity. May not be on this site due to its rules against interactivity.
  • And finally, dead ideas (Just putting these here for the sake of having a place to have them, after all I don't want to forget them. I forgot about HTaS until I read an older draft of Movie Day's first chapter). You can use these ideas if you want, I guess just give credit:

  • Homer Takes a Step -- Simpsons fan fic that is exactly what the title says it is. Except drawn out through tiring purple prose. This kind of sank when I retired Simpsons from most of anything, and I will almost certainly not pick anoter fandom to put this in. There was a brief idea where Homer suddenly gets sucked up into some major adventure where he can barely put his one foot down (like getting picked up by a helicoper and having to cling onto it), thus preventing him from stepping and thus ending the story immediately, but... I don't know. Maybe it will be remade into a Fictionpress story later on?
  • Movie Story -- Would-be parody of Seltzer and Friedberg movies before I realized this was a bad idea. I haven't planned much for this aside from it being another Fictionpress story.
  • Pip, Rip, and Seras do Stuff-- Oh God, it was embarassing just typing the title. So that was one of the last things I did before clicking "Safe Profile" in the SJAHJ-year two-profile update. (Said update just consisted of me reading over the ENTIRe profile for once and making it up-to-date) Basically... it was a prototype, even whackier version of the Hilll King, and a Hellsing story with... those characters. I can't remember if I even came up with HUC at the time, so this was a pretty old idea.
  • Yeah, total crap. I know. And I was talking about all three lists.

    A. Perhaps permanently, but I don't want to list a fan fic as "discontinued" unless I am 99% certain. Why are these fics listed here? Well:

    Intermissions: Innapropritate and disturbing, in general not very funny. They so far read more like a rejected Family Guy episode than like HUC or HHC. I already transfered one joke (the reader reacting to a bunch of trolls and their head exploding from the number of them) from the first intermission to Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals. And the plot of the first one is sorta gonna be done in OT32 Shenanigans. I might publish the rough draft of the chapters just so that people could laugh at what I once considered comedy.

    TDWTR: (This refers to the old version) The first and for a while only indefinite-hiatus story that I've published (and that's actually part of the reason why it's on indefinite hiatus), I find it to be a flat-out embarassment. Moreso than the SBIGtermissions mentioned just above, since TDWTR was 100% sincere while SBIGtermissions was just something I wrote out of frustration towards Homestuck's Midnight Crew Intermission. The plot makes no sense, every major character's personality is butchered (Ezekiel is a competant evil mastermind, Harold is a calm and planned genious, almost every other male is a hormonal idiot, etc., and that's not even getting started on how the girls turned out), every chapter except Japan has a stupid "action" scene that just plain doesn't fit with Total Drama, the four chapters that have been published have way too many "screw yous" towards the fandom (complete with twisting Sierra's character so that she's a "parody" of something I barely researched at the time) and in general the style just isn't something I like - line this up with my other story ideas, published fan fics or unpublished original or fan fiction, at it sticks out like Hank Hill in a field of Pikmin. At first I was just stuck on this one scene at the beginning of chapter 5 where every alliance is supposed to have a massive meetup but now I'm really starting to doubt this story. If I were to update, I would want to fix the first four chapters, which will require an amount of effort that I just don't want to put into this. (Complete with redoing a good chunk of the plot since Ezekiel is OOC-ly good with his plans.) If you really want to read a competition by me, try reading Total Zeksmit Plains. While the backstory's kind of weird and Host-Ezekiel is cringe-worthy, I try to make everyone more true to themselfs than I did in TDWTR. However, this huge rant is kind of outdated because I kinda remade this. But I still want to keep the rant, because it does kinda adress my issues with TDWTR.

    Onionstuck: Idea would generally take a ton of effort and time to work on even if I made it a text-only or text-mostly adventure, however the premise is stupid, the writing is Godawful even by my standards, the characters are unoriginal (Oliver is too much like Karkat, SI is too much like sober Gamzee, EB is too much like Calliope) and I can't really care enough about them to make them different, and many of the suggestions I've gotten are joke suggestions part of a meme completely unrelated to the comic, and for that matter completely unrelated to even Homestuck or Pikmin themselves. In a completely unrelated note, looking back it's hard to believe that this pre-dates... mmm... Movie Day at least, since I've had that idea for a while.

    SIMPSONS: Just plain dumb. Would be like SJAHJ only less complicated, having more confusing systems, and being taken a little more serious later on. Which I wouldn't exactly reject -- but I sure as hell don't want a Simpsons fan fic to be written like this. I could transfer this to a Total Drama crackfic, however... (Or anything. I'm especially leaning toward King of the Hill, but it runs the risk of being "The Hill King (see above) with more of a plot." Just not Homestuck because I'm already writing enough fan fics of that.)

    TSC: Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals (and, to a lesser extent, Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals) already covers the "parody fandom cliches" thing with more subelty and a lot more of an enjoyable, real plot that's not 100% focused on romance. And yes, HHC is actually subtle compared to my draft of TSC.

    Notice: I am officially retiring characters from Simpsons in SBIG, and hell possibly other fan fics unless the continuity requires it via Grandfather Clause (IE updating an old story where they already appeared such as SJAHJ, HHC because HUC said Homer would be reincarnated into Hank Hill and that's actually going to be something that occures on screen in HHC through Homer's ghost. Well... actually that's the only example. HHC is the last time you will see me write something Simpsons in SBIG, perhaps). I simply despise the newer seasons that much.

    Writing Pet Peeves:

    I feel the need to say this again, leaving moments from canon the same. Especially if it's taken word-for-word, pardon my French but that flat-out pisses me off. Don't rehash canon. And especially if the fan fic is one of those "what ifs" that are supposed to be all about change. (I mean if I wanted to see Ezekiel's elimination unfold in the exact same way I would just watch the actual episode of Total Drama where it happened.) Oh, if I see one more World Tour remake that begins with Gwen wanting reserved seats not behind Heather's pony hair, "My extensions are human hair," then Duncan makes a snide "You learn something new everyday" (I don't remember if this was taken from canon or a bunch of author copied one of them but regardless it's annoying) -- my head will explode.

    An entire chapter consisting of an AN. For that matter, when writers feel the need to split absolutely everything up into microchapters.

    When the fan fic takes place after current canon (or, though this is rarer, in a "split" from a midpoint in canon) and suddenly a pairing or more has hooked up offscreen. It's not just because it's often done with pairings I flat out hate (Cody/Sierra and Alejandro/Heather being the worst offenders), but also because it's really, really lazy writing. Look, I don't know why you would ship something if you can't even think of a reasonable scenario for them to get together without suddenly derailing them into lovebirds with no problems whatsoever. Offscreen hookups by themselves are fine, it's just when it's chronologically "between stories" that it feels lazy.

    The "love at first sight" cliche being played completely straight.

    When a pairing is written as some perfect make-out couple and either A: neither of their original characterizations are taken into consideration or B: the base for hooking them up really only takes one person into consideration and the other is just their trophy. (On the TD side of things Cody/Sierra and Heather/Alejandro are couples I have by far seen get it badly, and since I was never a fan of them it just gives me more reason not to like them. Honestly I don't read Homestuck fics much mainly because AO3 seems to lack adventure stories not centered around OCs but according to unpopular-homestuck-opinions John/Rose gets this, and according to what I've seen Jade/Karkat gets this too.)

    Rehashes of the Duncan/Courtney pairing being done with OCs. (Combines a pairing I hate with rehashing.)

    For Homestuck, I wrote an entire post on that. Do expect me to parody these; the first, second, and fifth bullet points have been accounted for, mostly HHC for the first (John saying that moiralligence means friends; the upcoming chpater 19 is all about the trolls being unable to understand quadrants) and SJAHJ for the second (Kankri giving a very specific list of blood colors by hex triplet) and fifth (Meenah pointing out Edwardcullensprite's apparant clothing).

    Total Drama related stuff:

    Favorite characters: Ezekiel, Bridgette, Izzy, Harold, Noah, DJ

    Least favorite characters: Duncan, Lindsay, Sierra (I'm sorry but I didn't like her stalking him throughout most of the season and to me her "redemption" was kind of weakly handled; she's better off as a one-shot or something, kind of like the Pre-scratch trolls in Homestuck. Also, as someone who hates pervert-type characters that get physical with someone and get away with it, I firmly believe that she deserved every bad thing that happened to her in the series.), Courtney, Katie, Sadie

    I'll turn the characters into a complete best-to-worst list w/ reasons later on.

    Fav pairings: Harold/Courtney, Duncan/Eva, DJ/Bridgette, Cody/Beth

    Least fav pairings: Cody/Sierra (Unhealthy as hell), Heather/Alejandro (I thought the season three finale sunk it but then they pulled off a move that was one of my pet peeves listed above and had them suddenly get together off screen), Duncan/Gwen, Duncan/Courtney (Duncan's a jerk and I'm glad World Tour and All-Stars cemented that), Ezekiel/Eva (she hates his guts and unlike Harold/Courtney you can't pin a blame on Duncan for it)

    Pairings I'm fond of and might get interested in: Gwen/Trent, Geoff/Bridgette, Owen/Izzy, Courtney/Owen, Duncan/Sierra (partly because of my idea in TDWTR and it just grew from there), Izzy/Bridgette (yes this is because of TZP. Those that have seen the old version before I edited it, TFSP, would know what I'm talking about.)

    This may change during my re-watch of the first three seasons, and watching every episode of the second and fourth. I've... seen the first two episodes of TDROTI but not much after.

    Homestuck related stuff:

    Favorite characters: Most of them. TBH I don't really care about the Exiles, though.

    Least favorite characters: Gamzee (Outright admitted as a walking plot device, pretty much just a diablos ex machina reason for Nepeta and Equius to die, and his stoned personality is mostly a reference to a meme. He's an even worse offender of the "It turns out I was behind everything!" schtick that Vriska had for a while), Lord English (Some Act 6 haters (I don't consider myself one of them yet but I'll admit my interest in Homestuck plummeted around A6I4) put it better than I could: In short, he himself is hardly tied to the plot or the main characters. Eventually I just lost interest in the Cherubim mythos or what's the key to killing him.)

    Can't make a list yet 'cuz I can't decide the order.

    Fav pairings: Any combination of the B1 kids in general, especially John/Rose and Dave/Rose (the latter I didn't really care about until I started writing Attack of the Killer Time Beetles! and found that I kind of like how their dynamic would work.)

    Least fav pairings: Vriska/Tavros, PM/Jack (Even in blackrom). There's honestly a lot of pairings that I don't give a crap about but seem popular like Jade/Karkat and John/Roxy but honestly even I'm not gonna compare them to those two that I already listed on here as my least favorite.

    Total Zeksmit Series

    This is a fan fic, planned to be a series of fan fics, of Total Drama hosted by Ezekiel with his co-hosts Justin and Geoff, as well as a mysterious tag along Kathy who shows up time to time. The contestants are all female, with the eleven from the first canon season being the people who compete in season one. Nobody ever returns to compete after being eliminated. At least, as a full contestant in the sense of Izzy and Eva in TDI... see "lifelines" below for more information on this.

    There's two seasons definitely planned, with a possible and likely third and fourth. In order, the seasons are Plains, Island, Woods, and Campsites Around the World. Challenges are mostly physical and involve skill, sometimes through tricky situations. There's no "eat this" challenges or anything too unfair. (Ex. of former: Brunch of Disgustingness, second part of Chinese Fake-Out. Ex. of latter: the rewards for Search and do not Destroy, That's Off the Chain!) The first two seasons contain an elimination each episode (and a double one on the first chapter of the second season), and the third will either alternate between single and double eliminations or have a double elimination every third epiosde. Or heck, the third might just be really long and have all single eliminations, but since I'm really drawn to the idea of season four I'd want to get three out of the way so doubles may be frequent. Not sure about season four.

    Unlike my other competitions, recaps will only be given at the beginning of Aftermaths.

    The settings of the first three seasons should be self-explanitory. Plains takes place in the wild prairies of Zekitunakwa. Island will take place in Wawanakwa, which in this universe is almost completely clean of pollution, but the elements of it are worse than in canon. Woods takes place in a very, very large forest that I have yet to really name. (It might be named after Aokigahara - Google that and you will find out why I think TZW will be a tad bit darker than the past seasons.) TZ: CAW, however, involves Total Drama World Tour-esque travelling around various campsites that are similar in a few themes (notably such as having a tall cliff that to be honest looks quite phallic, and yes I'm talking about the cliff present in the original show). It may also involve some sort of new lifeline with a "calling" system involving the people who live around here.

    There is also a side-series, called... well... Total Zeksmit Side Stories. There are no concrete rules to what TZSS has to be about: It could be AUs of the TZ competitions itself (unlikely), or anything, but the general gimmick is that it takes place in the unusual world in TZ and doesn't focus on the competitions. Instead, it's centered around the would-be contestants and to a lesser extent the would-be show staff going on very weird adventures. This is planned to begin after I'm finished with chapter 8 of TZP, and is supposed to be a "sneak peek" at some of the new contestants for season 2. And maybe season 3 once the competitions finally hit season 2.


    Lifelines are a concept that will be introduced in season 2. Basically, each team gets a number of lifelines that varies each season, and (at least in TZI; not sure about later) they can only each be used once per team. The team captain gets the final decision to use them. By the merge, any lifelines that aren't used give the captain-at-the-time invincibility in post-merge episodes, one lifeline grants one extra day. The reason for all these limitations and rules is because they are actually extremely powerful - just look for yourself:

  • Casualty (Introduced in TZI): When this is used, the team gets to compete wearing whatever they want for the entire day. There will be more costume-based challenges in seasons 2 onward, and just as in Plains they are going to make the costumes into dissadvantages.
  • Booster Shot (Introduced in TZI): This can only be used in challenges that use a point system (and to make it more tempting in-universe, there are going to be a lot more point challenges pre-teams than there were in Plains) and it gives the team that uses it ten extra points. Depending on how the points work, this can either be stupididly valuable (IE if one contestant can only earn two points at most) or next to useless (where the points work like scoring in video games, and things in the thousands are in the norm).
  • Resurrection (Introduced in TZI): One eliminated contestant, regardless of which team they were on or if they were kicked off before the teams were formed, can be summoned back by the team captain to compete in either all challenges for the episode or just one of the challenges. The person back, however, will do as well as she wants to, and could even sabatogue the team if she doesn't like them.
  • Snake's Venom (Introduced in TZW): This is also a point system challenge exclusive. It deducts five points from one of the two opposing teams of choise. This is obviously not in TZI because there are only two teams in that, giving it too similar of an effect to Booster Shot.
  • All of the TZI ones up will probably be the final lifelines; there are no plans to add more to the three. However, there will most likley not be only one new lifeline to TZW. At least, there will be two.


    So the old chapter 4 revealed elemental types for the first time. (Really I'm only bringing this up because I don't know how else to start this section now that TFS is TZ. Wow I can't believe there's still some unfinished TFS/TZ changes.) This is realistically not going to be mentioned that much and it won't really play a role in the competitions themselves so I'll just list the nine types: Air, fire/heat, earth, electricity, plant, animal, water, toxins, and death. There are also people whom don't have any such abilities (reffered to as neutrals), and hybrids of them. More on this later.


    As stated above, the original 11 will compete in season one. Starting season two, they will also compete alongside Sierra and a dosen original characters. If I do season 3, all 24 of them will compete alongside Blaineley and OCs of an undecided number (currently thinking 9).

    Andrea the Weapon Obsessed, Hyperactive Commander Wannabe (or just the Weapon) (First competes season 2)

    Emerald Gemm the Mischivious One out of the "Gemm Triplets" (First competes season 2)

    Ruby Gemm the Hot-Tempered One out of the "Gemm Triplets" (First competes season 2)

    Sapphire Gemm the Smart, Calm One out of the "Gemm Triplets" (First competes season 2)

    Iris the "Puzzle" Enthusiast

    Kandi the Logical, Arrogant Nudist (First competes season 2)

    Kathy the Vocal Creep (First competes season 2; cameos a few times in season 1 and appears in the special)

    Miriam the Unusual, Old-Times Artist (First competes season 2)

    Natalie the Witch-in-Sheeps-Clothing (First competes season 2)

    Samantha the Gangster (First competes season 2)

    Sonia the Techno, Wanting-to-Move-Foreward Musician (First competes season 2)

    Zelda the Nice Prarie Girl (First competes season 2; maybe cameos in season 1?)

    For the most part, any resembelance to other OCs is coincidental, but some very light inspiration are involved. Natalie is based losley off of Nazz from Ed, Edd n Eddy though.


    Anyone who's gimmick is that they're the "second [contestant," or they're "another [contestant]" (I want to be original here.)

    A really terrible, stupid concept that's obviously not going to happen in the main TZ series (IE an actual dog as a contestant, a teenage girl expy of Adolph Hitler, the spirit of Gaia, Gwen and Trent's future daughter who time traveled to the past to try to change some aspect of the future, Katniss Everdeen who isn't an expy but literally warped through spacetime to end up in the Zeksmitverse, etc. SJAHJ and/or HHC may convince you otherwise but I do draw lines. They're just really high lines.)

    A shy girl (I can't think of anyway to not make her a worthless "aw isn't she cute" type of character. Zelda is the closest you'll get, and you'll see why she hardly counts.)

    Someone who's overly sadistic to the point of making the whole story dumb, or only intimidates the cast by being violent with them/threatening deaths (This is a Total Drama fan fic that's supposed to have a plot-flow similar to canon, not SAW. "TEH DARKURZ AND EDJIER AZ IT GEOS AWN" for the sake of being dark and edgy isn't something I like. Also eliminations have the equivilent impact of death in TZ - or at least it's close enough - thank you very much.)

    People who are like genderbents of canon male contestants (I was thinking of doing this at first, but then I thought... nah. Genderbent expies might show up in Side Stories, or in an episode that features human life outside of the game. Or as intern cameos, but again they'll only be that: Cameos.)

    The Revenge of the Island cast (One of the more "reasonable" options that still ends up on this list, I'll be honest. I have no plans for them at all, and I'm not going to insert canon characters for the sake of having in every canon character. This also applies to pretty much any other fanwork of mine, AU or not. My last attempt at this, at least in a blatant shoe-horn way, was Sweet Jade and Hella John (IE Auto Responder, the carapases, pretty much all of the trolls, the ancestors) and look at how "well" that went. And even individually, these guys won't really work with TZ: Stacy is a joke, Dawn might contrast with the "atheistic world" TZ is set in (yeah, unlike most of my other works the Zeksmitverse is Godless and magicless even though there are elemental powers), Zoey's character just kind of ends at "is nice" (like one too many fan characters), and I haven't seen all of season four yet but I don't think Anne Maria, Dakota, or Jo could really carry stories with the TZ cast by themselves. They might be cameoes, but that's it: Cameos.)

    Someone who wants to "prove" something IE that just because they're a woman it doesn't mean they can't fight (Both because I can already tell I'm not going to like writing them (there's nothing wrong with messages just don't be obnoxious with them), and any hypothetical person like that who goes on a show hosted by Ezekiel thinking they can convince him anything is just setting themselves up for dissapointment.)

    A fangirl of [Insert real-life work of media or obvious fictional counterpart to it here] (I do not want to write a walking advertisement for, say, Homestuck. Nor do I want to jab at fans of, say, Twilight.)

    Someone's whose sole character is being based on being a token (I would impliment people of a certain sexuality/gender/etc -- or I could even ret-con one of the OCs into filling that role! -- but I'm not going to, say, make someone out of scratch who's only notable trait is that they're pansexual. I'm fine with diversity but having it just for the sake of diversity is very risky. Plus I don't want a walking stereotype.)

    A character who constantly spouts "lol randum" (I feel dumber just typing that) or otherwise non-sequetor statements, regardless of how many other characteristics they may have (I find those types of OCs to be ungodly annoying.)

    Canon fodder for the sake of canon fodder (I'd prefer the cast to each appear to have an equal shot at winning, and each of them being at least somewhat developed. I also don't want my early eliminations to be completely predictable, because from my experience predicable/fodder early eliminations makes the story have a really weak beginning and it becomes painfully hard for me to continue reading. I read somewhere once that a story's only as good as its beginning and its ending, and the more I think about that quote the more it makes sense. Although one of the confirmed OCs for TZI is to an extent canon fodder...)

    Not a character so much as a trait, but anyone who bears a tenth elemental class (Nope. There's only nine classes, people without any powers, and combinations between them all to varrying degrees.)

    REMAKING: (WARNING This gives away the eliminations of chapters 4 and 5.)

    It's not that I was unhappy with the old TZ, TFS - in fact, the only thing I don't really like is the title - it's just that I think these improvements will be for the better. Here's some changes that will happen/had happened to the series:

  • The biggest change is that there will no longer be reward challenges, and that the season will only be a miniseason of 13 episodes, counting the Aftermaths and special. The removed challenge concepts might be in TZI. The axed episodes are all the original reward challenges, with one exception: "It's a Shore Thing" will be the one removed here (a swimming themed challenge would be a nice preview for season two but pushing is becoming shoving and I'd rather it be AT season two), while "Blast to and From the Past" will become an elimination episode that will take its place (I want every season to have a cavewoman challenge and a naked challenge). This will not make the fan fic rushed, I believe, because the pacing in the current series is actually really slow right now.
  • The title will change to "Total Zeksmit Plains." "Total Fan Service Plains" honestly seems like a really repelling name and I personally don't like it.
  • Katie's elimination position will be swapped with Gwen's, and Bridgette's will be swapped with Leshawna's (the original chapter 9 elimination). Being kicked off fifth instead of third will surley lessen the blow of Bridgette losing early, which is a downside, but this will be a good oppertunity to develop her relationship with Izzy just as much as in the original version of this.
  • It no longer takes place in the future. Considering how this is an alternate timeline anyway, it doesn't really make much sense and the only point it had was to jab at Simpsons and the theorists that the world would end on December 21st, both of which are unnecessary.
  • The backstory. Instead of winning a competition, Ezekiel 'won' (it will be implied that Chris rigged it) a special EMDHS challenge where the winner gets to host their own mini reality show. As much as I would like to outright state the second season and then keep it a secret for the rest of the competition until the very last scene, that will not happen in the remake because Ezekiel would not know that his minishow will get a second season in the first place. Though I could do a similar trick, only with the third season... if I decide to go that far...
  • Pop culture references in the early chapters are tonned down significantly. I only say early because the later chapters tone them down anyway. Intern expies still stay, though.
  • Ezekiel's work as Mytube video maker Zeksmit682 and his history with Kathy are out of the story; like Justin, Kathy will now be relatively new to his... "production crew." Zeksmit Clipz no longer exists. Mytube, on the other hand, does still exist in the Zeksmitverse, because I really want to show off this new "futuristic" (even though it doesn't take place in the future anymore) website that in spite of its name is more than just a Youtube clone.
  • Here's what will stay the same:

  • Heather's elimination, and all eliminations in the merge. (Basically all of them that hadn't happened in the old version of this series except chapter 9's/Leshawna's.)
  • Justin's rival is still Alejandro. Courtney's boyfriend is still the same guy, which is still a secret.
  • The elemental thing stays because I really like my idea of vampire types, and if it wasn't for the classes Side Stories wouldn't really exist, and if SS didn't exist there wouldn't be much reason to have an alternate universe, Chris's EMDHS competition comes off as more jarring, and the concept of the TZ series really falls apart from there.
  • The events of the special and everything onward (seasons 2, 3, and 4) will remain the same no matter what option I take. I can't garuntee that there will be a third and fourth season, but I'm pretty sure there will at least be a second one. (No season 2 kind of paradoxically rids the purpose for the first season. This is because Plains is more of a "season zero" to the whole series.)
  • The conflicts, friendships, and relationships. (This is an improvement, not a complete redux. Swapping the SB and KJ eliminations wasn't just reduxing, it was done because I felt that it would help the flow of the story more.)
  • Recaps are still gonna be in the Aftermaths; actually this is now good seeing as the Aftermaths will be at almost every sixth episode again.
  • Still not splitting the episodes; don't really need to. They already drag on as-is.
  • All four major members of the show staff, with their same roles. Ezekiel will still be the host, Justin will be the co-host, Geoff will be the Aftermath host, and Kathy is still the background designer that shows up sporatically.
  • The OCs, including Kathy. Kathy will appear in a different patten of episodes, however; her original pattern was every power of two (2, 4, 8, 16, and an exception, 20), as well as some of the Zeksmit Clipz. Her first appearance was still in chapter 2.
  • Speaking of OCs, Zelda will still get a cameo in the form of what takes the place of the auditions during the Aftermaths. "The Teal Blaze" clip still exists, but it's no longer part of a series.
  • Pretty much every other subplot not listed in the "changed" section except possibly "Homer" (which may be replaced with another thing, but will still serve the exact same purpose).
  • I would like to note that even though the chapter challenges are the same and the same pre-merge eliminations happen, just with slightly better writing, DO NOT SKIP THEM! Especially since you did NOT know who was going to get voted off on the original chapter 9! Unless you read the above bullet lists but that's not the point!

    Sweet Jade and Hella John.

    Yes, this is over. Yes, it was an ultimate old shame to end all old shames (except for TEE. Seriously, that was/is terrible). Yes, I doubt that many people have made it that far (I doubt anybody made it this far in my profile). Yes, I know I said editting will start shortly, yet as of March 2,014 it's untouched aside from the final update back in July of last year. However, before I update it (which, by the way, will not be until after finishing Total Zeksmit Plains at the soonest; I do not consider this a high priority at all), I want to clairify some author's word here. These questions may or may not have already been answered in the narative, I'll have to check some time later:

  • The reason why there's a tank in the Strider household is because Sis is extremely paranoid that Sleepy Dogwoman will attack again.
  • The "human ancestors" all do kind of share names with their HHC counterparts. I say kind of because Dave's Bro and Roxy's Mom(/Sis in HHC) have been genderbent, and so it's a little bit trickier. Katana Chick is named Lily, Grand Highbuck is named Violet, Adventure Dude is named Dean, and Reddy McCoolshades is named... Dale, I guess that leaves?
  • Most of the Millennium's actions can be explained by this: Lord Major Quimby is a complete idiot. Except for Rip. Her actions can be explained by: She's crazy.
  • Um... I guess Hecksing/Hellsing (I honestly forgot which name they went by)'s backstory is the same as the first chapter of HUC, with Heavensing being an individual unit instead of part of a greater HRG. Carl did, in fact, end up killing Pip, except unlike before he ended up taking him over. Pip's death was still an accident, except Carl feels a lot guiltier about it and tries to take over his life through use of a paper-thin disguise (it's the eye-patch) so that his friends won't be dissapointed.
  • This is not just some AU/alternate timeline of Crconikals. Because I didn't like how its verse works (wiping a universe from existance from just one paradox seems a little too harsh), SJAHJ's multiverse opperates on a completely different laws of... physics? Than my other works. It also takes place in a completely seperate multiverse. The fact that Quimby and Hank are so different from their Crconikals counterparts should be an indicator of this.
  • I have no idea how Steven Universe would play in SJAHJ's world, since SJAHJ ended before I took interest in SU and indeed before it even aired. The editting will almost certainly not cover it. So unless there's a sequel, indirect or direct (neither likely), don't expect this to come up until I can make up my mind as to how "real" it is in SJAHJ's world. (Co-exists with HS/KOTH/Hellsing, part of the Mario session but otherwise fictional, show-within-a-show brought to life ala Homer/BR/CU, or purely show-within-a-show.)
  • I actually tried to avoid showing swastikas because I was not sure if that would violate the MSPA forum rules. I'm still not completely certain. A lot of the weirder things I did in this story is because I'm not sure if the original plan would violate the MSPA forum rules. Believe me, the end result dialogue, especially earlier into the story, was toned down. Specifically what Jade says. Specifically about Dave and their ancestors. I also had to lurk around before getting the idea that ectoincest won't get the story insta-removed from the site, hence why there was very little John/Jade teasing near the beginning.
  • Going back to what I probably confirmed already, Jade is characterized to be so horrible to turn around the common dipiction of her I hear of as a really nice and never agressive person and never fighting back any idea no matter how much she dislikes it. And... this one's a little more petty (and not confirmed on the forums I'm sure of it), to try to "outdo" characterizations of her that make her kind of, for a lack of a better word, really open. Like, tomboy who doesn't give too much of a damn about nudity or whatever. I don't know. The thought made sense to me at the time.
  • Nepetazilla did turn back into normal, bright red blooded Nepeta (I refuse to use the term "candy red," simply because I think of candy-like blood and that sounds disgusting) by the end. The fact that her chaticon was red instead of white on the final page sort of implied this, but it could easily be mistaken for something else (convenience, since an actual white icon would look invisible and it seems like ODP is contacting John from the dead about his actions) and... oh, speaking of Nepetazilla, all Leijons have their clothing specifically design to be able to morph into any size whenever they themselves grow or shrink. These girls were just really, really prepared. If anybody else tried to grow massive like that, they would probably rip their clothing. That's why the Slender Aranea-like being in Carl Stevens Universe was "naked" nah it's not Slender Aranea it's a random monster that kind of looks like her.
  • John and Nepeta's break up was kind of based on real life events, but not in the way you would think. I'll elaborate more in the "What would you do if you see someone wearing a Homestuck shirt" thread (because I think that's what the thread is also for) later, but the gist is, I didn't want to feel... I don't know, akward? that they were together. This would probably make a lot more sense in context, but the bottom line was that nobody really made me break them up. Of course, I don't really care anymore, since they (as with the other SJAHJ-patronships, and the Prospit kid's original "rivals" with their patron's A1 stand-ins) will be roommates together from... pairing nine? of 496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems, and a bunch of stuff escallates from there, and thanks to the premise they will hook up in that story anyway to become one of the 496 (snicker, snicker, spoilers there's a lot more maybe end spoilers) pairings. Oh, and if John and Nepeta were still together, then Jade might be with a still-living Kanaya, and earlier would have used her then-last two lives on Equius and Feferi, who will date Jane and Jake respectively. (Her reviving Dirk was unnecessary as with Dave killing him, and Jenn could have found life another way.) Just because all patronships, and to tick off anyone who hates SJAHJ-Jade.
  • Expect to see more of the following in later and unrelated works: The Curse Woman (now with 100% more backstory!), Omega Drew Pickles, Hydra (Death Mecha and Darkhorse, on the other hand, might have met their ends in HHC, or might not have), Adventure Time characters (a future SBIGlet it planned to focus on them at least), Dave's end result (just as a seperate character), my self-insert (he'll get killed off every appearance), dream-entering, SJAHJ-styled dreamselves (these concepts I liked, and they'll probably be more of an indicator to tell the difference between dreams and reality), SJAHJ's patronships (Nepeta to John, Kanaya to Jade, Equius to Jane, Feferi to Jake), the Fox Crew (with lots of different members of course!), the Hank-Rip rivalry or at least them having some kind of relationship, and the concept of a ton of technicolor alternate selves of someone (already planned for one story).
  • Expect to see no more of the following in later and unrelated works: Elitaa, Puerco, and Activist (you can tell I'm bad with fantrolls), doll-head Silencer, A2 ancestors without A1 ancestors (Dave's Hangover being the only exception, unless Homestuck updates with info on them before DH is out), Aranea and Meenah being more important than the other A1s (I'm trying, and in fact I thought I did well with SJAHJ itself since Meenah's only roles were back in the intermission, then again she kind of started all of the vampires so...), references to other fanventures (sorry but that ship has sailed, with exceptions like the breif nod to Superego), and Everybody's Evil But the Main Characters.
  • This will probably be moved to a Tumblr post later, along with other "leaks" (I guess, that's what the name of an SCP thread with a similar purpose is called) of my other fan works.


    Here's a little more specific details about the fic, but it's still the very bare basics.

  • These are going to be part of the same fan fic; the premise is listed above. Polygamy aholy! (Which is partly supposed to fill in the void of me ending/remaking Total Drama World Tour Rewrite, and partly because I couldn't think of that many settings and I didn't want to write all dreambubble fics.)
  • To recap and elaborate: the pairing centered in the ficlet will always be done in the flushed quadrant/"regular" human romance. Also, since I've decided to have all pairings happen in the same setting, let's face it: multiquadrant writing will get really messy, really fast. Conversations that would be intended to be serious would read like conversations between the trolls in Sweet Jade and Hella John. And I absolutley hated looking back on the conversations between the trolls in Sweet Jade and Hella John. Also I don't want to nitpick between which pairings I want to actually hook up and which I want to keep as rivalries/mediation triangles (which contrasts the groups-of-two thing anyway unless you don't count the mediator)/one-person-pacifies-the-other, because those three don't actually feel like romances to me for obvious reasons. I'm sorry, but I can't take the quadrants seriously. Yes, I know that was the intent.
  • INFO ABOUT THE COUPLE LIST: (Minor spoilers?)

    Here's a rule: If I'm stuck on one chapter and work on a future chapter, then I finish the future chapter, once the chapter I'm stuck on is done I will publish both that and the future chapter at the same day. You can probably expect this to happen a lot with Jake, since each chapter pairing him up begins with an excerpt from his crappy comic book draft, which I cannot write at all. Fortunately (or not since that would mean the later chapters are more dense with him), the next Jake chapter isn't for quite some time.

  • You already know that the first F/F pairing is Jane/Roxy at number one, and according to the closing AN the first M/F pairing is Jake/Terezi at three. Well, the first M/M pairing (which is also coincidentally the first incest pairing) is not until eleven.
  • Dirk/Kanaya is within the first 30 pairings but I don't think this is important because that kinda-meme doesn't seem to be as popular anymore.
  • Patron shipping fans, don't hold your breath: Three of them are in the four hundreds (one of those three being the third-to-last couple), though the other one is number 34.
  • Tavros will be the last person to get involved in a pairing, at couple number 63. Bizarrely, the second-last person, Equius, will have his first chapter back in couple 29. The former will be first paired with a guy and the latter will be first paired with a girl.
  • Both of Karkat's shipping grid pairings are in the two hundreds.
  • All but one of the Sweet Jade and Hella John patronships (John/Nepeta, Jade/Kanaya, Feferi/Jake, and Equius/Jane) happen before 100, and the one that doesn't is only shortly after. Two of them are back-to-back.
  • Dave is the first person to "complete" a harem of all 31 other players. Thinking about the first half of Sweet Jade and Hella John, this is actually a pretty fitting coincidence. Jane is the second.
  • My least favorite of these 496 possibilities (hint: scroll up) is a little after 100.
  • All of the "Crackcest Decathalon" ships are at a point after pairing 100, with widely varrying distances.
  • The last couple is crack. Cross-session crack, too.

  • Total Drama World Tour Rewrite Rewrite

    If you liked the old version, you will probably like this. It's the same basic plot, but with better wording, pacing, and less complaining from my part.

    The following will be/has been changed from the original fan fic:

  • Ezekiel's accomplishments and aditude will be toned down significantly. He will still pull the strings behind Owen's elimination, only he won't actually mean to kick him off. He doesn't actually start making master plans until after Owen loses (scratch that, so far it's coming out as he won't until Tyler loses thanks to how I'm doing chpater 3), and even then he's terrible at them and has to get bailed out several times.
  • Removing most of the meta humor. No, just no. Also, in a less related note, I think Homestuck has turned me off of the idea of meta humor by loads. Seriously.
  • A few of the eliminations will be changed from the old version. All of the eliminations of the chapters that have been published of the old version AND a change in plans for New York, except Egypt's chapter, will be changed.
  • The ship battle in chapter 2 and a sled fight in chapter 4 (maybe not for the latter) will still take place, but the arrow scene in the first chapter has been heavily remade.
  • Lindsay and Leshawna will be on swapped teams; there's no point in having Leshawna on Victory other than dumb angst (and as someone turned off by fan fics that treat interteam interactions as something horrible or "They must be making a secret alliance!" said angst is even dumber), and Lindsay sucks too much to be a part of the "central" team. Also she gets to compete with her best friend so there's that. Tyler and DJ also "switch" in both teams and in the Guy's Alliance; it makes more sense, now all five members would be ones that have/had girlfriends. This now means that Team Chris is the only one left unchanged.
  • Removing that thing about the teams not being allowed to invite eachother over to the economic/first class since there wasn't really that much purpose to it. Also this would make way more oppertunity for the eight girls to all be together more often.

  • Ed, Edd n Eddy's Awesome Edventures

    (TV Tropes page, since I don't consider this important enough to link to on the main list above at the time)

    Like the SBIG series, this is my attempt at "irony." There are two series of episodes: "Awesome Edventures," which are mostly not connected and mostly consists of people (not just the Eds) fooling around, with abnormal incidents being very common. "Story" episodes are part of a longer, nonsense plot. Except I might not do the story episodes, or at least heavily re-work them into a simpler plot.

    This may be in either webcomic or video form. As of now, it depends on how determined I am to try to see why Windows Movie Maker won't play Speakonia files (I exported one to .WAV format and it says that it cannot play the file for some reason.)

    Episodes -- Awesome Edventures:

    [Note: Unless stated otherwise, these episodes are not listed in planned production/air order.]

    "Ed Pool:" Eddy and Edd are attempting to play a game of 8-ball, but Eddy repeatedly hits the wrong suit. They then try to play 9-ball, but Eddy keeps hitting the balls in the wrong order (might not do this scene). Frusterated, Eddy comes up with a freestyle and customisable billiards game, but things go wrong when the "mines" (which is an obstacle you're supposed to avoid hitting) turn out to be a little too realistic. Highly likely to be the pilot, and pretty much a "test" episode.

    "Breakin' Out:" A rewrite of the episode where the Eds and Jonny attempt to escape from school, wherein they actually succeeded in leaving instead of (SPOILERS!) getting caught on the fence and being shot back. Highly likely to be the first lengthy episode. ("Ed Pool" might only be a test about two minuites long, while this will be about five to eight.)

    Episodes -- Story:

    [Note: For context, the "Story" episodes take place after the movie. Also, these are in production/air order.]

    "A Awesome Beginning:" [sic] The Eds are hanging around when the Kanker sisters attack them. Angered, Edd makes a plan to gather the other kids for revenge. However, it turns out that the Kankers have gotten Jonny on their side.


    This is a word list on all of the SBIG installments. My goal is to make this, as a whole eventually much longer than Homestuck (I don't care about the rest of MSPA). Going by their initials, and in publishing order:

  • TEE: 735
  • ZA: 928
  • HUC: 25,763
  • SJAHJ: 269,986*
  • S and L (I can't use the "and" character otherwise it seems to completely bonk up the formatting) TaF: 150*
  • KFTT: 2,248
  • HHC: 133,622*
  • GVS: 7,522*
  • Total: 440,954. HS's is at around 700,000, not counting the mass update. Until then, goal halfway reached?

    One asterisk: I just went to the search page, copied everything, pasted it on a word counter, and removed the copyright at the bottom and the links at the top. This seems to count the dates, so if anything it's actually lower.

    Two asterisks: So far. Only counting the latest thing I have published. Unpublished later chapters are not added. To keep this simple in case I update something without updating this (expect that to happen as I may completely forget about this), this is as of the 20th of March 2,014.

    Author's notes are not counted. Neither are the footnotes of Zombie Attack!

    PS since S&L is completely visual, I individually counted the words in the actual images. (Well, at first. A formatting error wiped out the line, so I had to add everything else back up and subtract that from the total to get the result) Thanks to the short length. (Not including the "Sheldon" and "Leonard" tags, or the names or their shirts, or "unintentional" word duplications. Or the "Big Bang Theory" logo. Note that, thanks to the way it's formatted, I could very well miscount at certain spots.) SJAHJ does have some visusal-only words, I will not hand-count them.

    Yeah the second S&L strip is only 22 words long though.

    Anyway, for the future... well, I estimate that HHC will have at the absolute, if-I'm-stuck least 10,000 words per each of its six chapters in season six, followed by whatever season seven ends up like. The latter of which could range from really short to soul-crushingly long. Oh, I took the average of the words of chapters 11-17. It's around 12,000. I went with seasons four and five because their individual chapters are a lot longer and they paint the picture for how season six may go down.



    With Movie Day published, I still have some problems with Soap and Real Story. For the former, I have a few ideas down for chapters and the like, but I realized that I haven't given much depth to any of the characters at all. For the latter, I already have the canon characters with personalities (Bash the show all you want and say that the Squirrel Boy characters are two dimensional or whatever but I can garuntee that they have more depth than my current plans of the Soap cast.) and I have given some thought into the original characters as well, I just have no idea how to excecute the plot without it becoming either a jumbled mess or a lame "fight this one villain then go to the next then the next" storyline. (You can tell with SJAHJ that I like complicated, multi-sided plots.) I have been flip-flopping as to which of them I should do first. As of this profile update, I'm going with Real Story, but that could change.

    Originally I had a huge list about getting some fics out within a certain deadline, but after the Halloween Update (Basically GVS chapters 1 and 2; TDWTR 1 and 2; and 496 pairings 3, 4, 5, and 6) but I have no place to put this, here's me confirming that SBIG shall be annual:

  • 2009: The Eds' EDventure.
  • 2010: Zombie Attack!
  • 2011: Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals.
  • 2012: Currently the only one with more than one year: Sweet Jade and Hella John, Sheldin and Lenard Tock About Fysics, Kids Fit the Trolls, and Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals.
  • 2013: Gumball Vs Satan
  • 2014: Possibly Act 5 Vs Act 6 and/or SBIGlets.
  • By fic - Published:

    The Eds' EDventure: This is on hiatus until I get some inspiration for the second chapter. I might have said this earlier here, but a lot of my fan works don't tend to get written unless I have seen or played something that heavily inspires them. To give an example, HHC underwent a huge pause once I finished Majora's Mask. PS, the second chapter is planned to be long.
    Zombie Attack! Once TEE's second chapter is written, I'll start the remake of this. The remake will include some better spelling and redirecting to Gumball vs Satan to find an actual ending. Until then, however, see The Eds' EDventure itself above. The remake may also be a lot longer than the original, simply because that was written back then and this will be written later when I lost the ability to keep a story short.
    Total Drama World Tour Rewrite: Finalized most of chapter 3, finished chapter 4's rough draft. Started on 5. I would have this updated by now, but I don't like the attention it's getting compared to TZP (not saying much) and I don't want it bumped back on the first page again. So I'm delaying this until a little after TZP's next update. Which is soon. Look below.
    Total Zeksmit Plains: Chapter 4 is completely finished I believe, 5's rough draft is almost done and I already have a mental idea for 6's beginning, however I'd like to edit a few things about the first three chapters. Getting rid of Bridgette's MPD subplot for 1 and 2 (I started thinking the idea was bad soon after remaking it from TFSP to TZP, and now that Mal exists... the concept is completely dead), and changing Bridgette willingly undressing herself in front of Ezekiel in chapter 3. Chapter 1 has been looked over, working on chapter 2 right now. 2 should go by fast because I don't think the MPD plot is implied at all; I thought it was at the beginning, like chapter 3 of the original TFSP, but I guess I was wrong. Bottom line, expect chapter 4 out before March ends, and chapter 5 early- to mid-April. Chapter 6 is a wild-card. To give you an idea, it's the only merge-onwards chapter of the season I'm going to rename.
    Onionstuck: I've been working on the update sometimes... less often recengly, though. You know, this has been in such terrible condition that I'm considering calling it discontinued until further notice. But as I want all of my published stories to be considered having potential for completition, I may replace this with another Sburb fansession and call it a "remake." Except not. Since the players may be alternate versions of the demons from This Story is Sexist!
    Movie Day: After servere writer's block on chapter 2's beginning, things have been getting just a little bit better now.
    Sheldin And Lenard Tock About Fysicks: There will probably only be five comics total. Even so this is still a low priority.
    Kids Fit the Trolls: Sequel's comin' soon. Probably after I knock out TZP's... fourth to sixth chapter, and while I'm working on TEE. Or not, since I do kind of like some of the plans for A5VA6 and I don't want to wait until I'm working on TEE again.
    Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals: Season 6 will begin on June 11th, as afterall I will need a lot more extra time to write this and even by seasons 4-7 standards each chapter of season 6 will be pretty long and require a lot of fine details. I picked this date because it was the day I found some fanart I was a little fond of. Season 7 (the last season), I guess, can start on September 7th, so it will end on the end of year three for HUC. I would have liked it to begin on April 7th so that HHC's beginning dates of its odd numbered seasons matched with HUC's... seasons in general, and so that HHC can end on 4/13, but season 6 will take a lot of effort to write (and I can't update with S7 before S6. That makes no sense at all) and I don't think season 7 will take so much effort as to postpone it until 4/13/2,015.
    496: Sorta started on Meutuna. Stuck. Started working on the chapter after that.
    Gumball Vs Satan: I might just let this gather dust for a while. Haven't worked on chapter 3 at all yet. By the way, six chapters total.

    By fic - Unpublished: (Not finished, listed by likely publishing order)

    Simpsons Meets Brandy and Mr. Whiskers: Started this at the beginning of February and I hoped to finish it by Valentine's Day, basically giving me two weeks to write the entire thing. It helped that the chapters are rather short, especially compared to just about all of my serious works so far and the later installments of SBIG. Like, I think these chapters will be around the length of an average Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals chapter. If merged together they would make a reasonable oneshot, but I think it will help the pacing if I divide them by the locations the characters reach. Ultimately, however, I just kind of stopped on that ever since failing that goal.
    Desert City
    I'd say I'm about... halfway done. At the very least. With the rough draft.
    ...I Thought Those Were the Ingredients: Kind of off to a decent start.
    Total Drama Race: I will start writing this after getting out either chapter 8 of TZP (where I think the core dynamic changes a little bit), or the original plan of chapter 12 of TDWTR (this was going to be mid-TDWTR filler, hiatus of Rewrite itself optional but probably not going to happen). Whichever comes first.
    Dave's Hangover: Like SMB&MW, I started this at the beginning of February. Unlike that, the 14th is nowhere near a realistic goal date. It may be a one-shot, but I'll have to do a lot of planning for this (SMBaMW was pretty much thought up already, beginning to end, at least a year before I started writing the file. And I am talking about the new version. All I have to do is find not-cringe-worthy words to put it in.) and even so, it might be longer than the entirety of SMBaMW.
    Everburn: ...Well the beginning's done and the ending part of the first chapter's done but there's a lot of holes in between. Particularlly towards the earlier points. And I don't really like the beginning that much either. I started on the second chapter at least.
    Act 5 Vs Act 6
    : Eh... put a little pause on this.
    Kids Fight the Zombies: Same here, but I'm more interested in this than A5VA6.
    SBIGlets: ...I don't know. I haven't really done anything lately for all three of the stories I both released (there's a lot more concepts I haven't given out here) and started working on. PS, SBIGlets will already be tricky to understand, but it tempts you to tie them together. Which gets worse because they are not all supposed to be tied together. And hell, there's also some that will be related to already-established fics.
    Soap: I currently have writer's block on that because I have no idea at all on how to develop the main characters. As it stands my plans for them just make them seem terrible, one-dimensional, and annoying. Well, 'annoying' might not fit the first two of four main characters introduced, but it would likely fit the latter two.
    The Real Story
    : Started this 3/26 of 2,013 after I made a bet with myself over a certain fan fic over whether it will do a cliche move. I lost the bet (I would give kudos to the author since the cliche in question (bringing Blaineley into a fan TD season on to have her not do anything and get kicked off first) is highly overused, except that fan fic has a self-insert so blatant and untollerable IMO that it pretty much ruins the story and I'd rather not give publicity negatively to specific fan works. Also I forgot what it was called.), so I have started on this.
    Temples: Let's just say that my lack of progress on this (still at the twisted hallway, look up a playthrough of the OOT Forest Temple and see how early that is) is one of the many, yet more minor, reasons why I prefer Dersecest to Prospitcest. (Oh hey I for once actually like a pairing that is more popular on the fandom than it's "immediate counterpart!" I thought the TD fandom would drive me away from that!) Ironically the point I'm stuck at is supposed to be where John and Jade's progression through the temple as well as the next four temples becomes more original and quicker paced.

    By fic - Unstarted: (Just planned dates on starting, mostly)

    This Story is Sexist! First off, the title might change. Thinking Duck!, because the main character is named Duck. Second off, I decided not to start this until reaching a minor goal. The problem is, I have no idea what that goal should be. Probably getting out chapter 6 of TZP? Or 5 of TDWTR, whichever comes first.

    Total Drama Competition Advice:

    This is really more of another list of pet peeves if anything but I don't care.


  • Never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever have someone rig the votes. That is extremely lazy writing; basically being a bad plot device. Harold rigging the votes was basically just an excuse, and it should not be something to be repeated in fan fics. (Not only because it had been done before in canon, but because... well... yeah, it's an uncreative and stupid way to get someone voted off. Especially if the rigger is supposed to be the main antagonist, which Harold by the way was not. Mal was, but... well it didn't work anyway and don't most people hate the fifth season?) Also, I'd like to say that just because something happened in the canon of a work I like does not always mean I found it to be a good decision. This is a prime example.
  • Don't make everyone treat interteam dating or friendships as if it were a serious taboo. For Heather, it makes sense, seeing how bossy and how much of a wannabe strategist she is, and maybe it will make sense for Courtney, but for anyone else it's rather out of character. None of the contestants are so paranoid that they think that any human interaction is a sign of an alliance just because they were categorized in by a list/the team captain/the first challenge, that's stupid. And if you think "Well my OC is basically a new Heather so-" please read the first astrisk under OC creating "advice."
  • Confessionals should be used for a person's thoughts and/or elaboration on minor events, and not for characters to give out exposition. Remember, it's supposed to be a reality show, and in reality shows we don't hear the contestants' thoughts like we do in most works of fiction because we aren't mind readers. One use of the confessional is to take the place of that. I'm saying this because there were some fics that have the whole show a character's literal thoughts, which is kind of redundant due to the confessionals.
  • Try to plan at least around four eliminations ahead. For seasons with reward challenges, still think in terms of eliminations. This way you can make it easier to develop the characters who will be getting voted off, and could even do what I do and put great focus on them just to kick them off early, effectively making the eliminations surprising. After all, who expects a seemingly main character getting the boot in chapter 7?
  • Rewrite specific:

  • Don't rehash canon. I know I said this earlier, but I can't say this enough. Rehash means to bring something again without significant altering. And don't have one character do the exact same thing another character did in canon (ex. Cody avoiding getting caught by Chef by hiding under water in "Hide and be Sneaky" when Leshawna did that originally; something I've seen twice so far, though I'm sure one was inspired by the other); that's lazy writing and it's pretty OOC, and personally I think it's even worse than complete unalteration because it shows that even when forced to have something that should lead to a different outcome you redo what had happened as a result of laziness. Say what you will about character development, but the contestants are pretty unique, so them ending up in the exact same situations is unlikley. A good, entertaining rewrite is not one that nickpicks at what will be original while using canon events to fill in the rest. If you want to use the bare-bones idea for a concept, for the love of God please at least plan that the excecution will be different.
  • Don't always make the same teams win as in canon; have the victor be determined based on context and reason, not "well this team was the original winner so they should win here too." It makes the fan fic pretty boring and predictable when we know which team is going to win every time.

  • Original Character Creating "Advice:"

    The word "advice" is written in quotes because for now I'm not sure how this will turn out. Hell, I might even delete this.

    Ok. So first I'm going to define what I think a Mary/Gary Sue is. I have thought that one generally follows some of these traits:

    1. Takes way more spotlight than anyone else, especially if needlessly. Like focusing on their irrelevant shenanigans while the actual plot comes to a grinding halt. This goes moreso if the story is supposed to be on an ensemble, rather than a single hero.
    2. Takes way more importance to the plot than anyone else. Moreso than one would expect from a main character.
    3. Either has no flaw that actually does anything in the long run or has a "flaw" that's only stated when the events in the story contradict it. (IE they randomly trip even though it doesn't matter, "are hard to make friends with" or "shy" but inexplicably befriend the author's favorite characters, or are "dumb" yet end up more savvy than even the characters that are supposed to be savvy.)
    4. Solves almost any and all problems, especially individually. This ties into point 2.

    These traits do not automatically make someone a Sue in my eyes:

    1. Anything unusual but still possible within the fiction's world. (My TZ OC Amy is built around this. Sort of.)
    2. Dressing in fancy/revealing clothing.
    3. Being an author stand-in. (I absolutley hate self-inserts as part of the main cast group, but I'm sure it can be pulled off well. Basically don't make them vehicles to shove your opinion's down the reader's throats, give them reasonable flaws, and everything should be okay.)
    4. Being extremely powerful. As long as they either don't completely trivallize almost everything they face or they are given some reasonable limitations. Let's use Rock Pikmin and Pikmin 2-era Purple Pikmin as a comparason: Rock Pikmin add a bit more variety in combat, where throwing them helps more than charging them or dismissing them, and while they add extra damage it still isn't much to really insta-kill anything more than the basic enemies that any other color can insta-kill. Sure, they're also immune to a number of attacks, but not only do some of them leave them stuck in the ground for a few seconds, but other Pikmin have their immunities. They overall make a few situations helpful but don't break the game open (er... final boss aside, and even that takes effort). Purples, on the other hand, can be used to wipe out anything not in water or the final boss in a matter of seconds, granting a near-win in the game. Just effortlessly chuck a few of them and even some of the larger enemies will be dead, and if they don't die they'll probably be stunned too. They may be hard to get, and slow (and that can be negated with Spicy Spray!), but this isn't really anything to worry about unless you're new to the second game or get caught off guard. Like, the Gattling Groink is the only regular enemy in the game you have to worry about killing them before they kill it. In short, if going for power, write Rock Pikmin, not Purple Pikmin.
    5. Sad backstories. Granted, these can be pretty stupid themselves, but I think that a crappy backstory and a crappy character can be mutually exclusive.

    Basically, it's all about excecution, not concept. Sort of. Pretty much everything is significantly harder to pull off well if it fits the second numbered list above.

    These are some general points I came up with, going by trends I have seen with OCs in various fandoms:

  • I've said things along these lines a lot, so let me put it this way: Don't forget that the "O" in "OC" stands for original.
  • Do not base a character off yourself unless you absolutely, completely know what you're doing! Trust me, this can get messy. And can lead to some pretty bland character types. And personally, I find it to be really uncreative and lazy writing, moreso than using canon characters because it takes no effort to try to guess the OC's actions or fill in the personality if all it takes is to ask yourself "What would I do in that situation?"
  • There is nothing wrong with having OCs period, especially for something like Simpsons where every other episode has a new group of people.
  • I might get some flack for this but there is nothing wrong with pairing an OC with a canon character so long as you are not just using the OC as an excuse to pair up yourself with a character you have a crush on. Some people do this with canon characters as well by derailing them into self-inserts; not too good of an idea either and I find it worse than having an OC do it because at least for the OC you don't have an established character you're ruining. (Or, if the romance is poor, compared to self-inserting instead of self-inserts only one established character is ruined instead of two.)
  • How easy is it to answer if someone asks, "What is the difference between your OC and [canon character]?" Excluding looks, name, and backstory. If their personalities are just about identical, try to tweak them as much as possible to make a more new character. Or use the character that they are a copy of. It's not innovotive or interesting to have an original character who's quirk is that they're a ripoff of an established character from the same series.
  • Characters who exist to mostly fulfil one closed in joke with little room for character development are bad ideas in the case of special groups like Homestuck session players (unless that session in particular is hardly elaborated upon) or Total Drama contestants, where the room for the main cast is limited. Having one or two gimick characters is alright; the entire "gang" consisting of them might make the fan fic something of a repetitive annoyance to read.
  • An original character who'se personality only ammounts to "They really like X and if you insult it to them then they get REALLY MAD AND GRRGBEESGKVAJSGA" is not a well developed character. For that matter, try to use that gimmick sparingly or not at all.
  • I try to base my OCs off basic character types that were not part of the original group.

    Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

    Total Drama Action Redux by Lord Akiyama reviews
    An alternate universe story based around my idea of how the series would have gone. - Chapter Ten: Full Metal Drama
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 112,298 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 12/9/2012 - Published: 9/12/2010
    Hunters' Chorus by GinkoToothed reviews
    What ever occurred between the Monster and the Huntress after the attack on the Adler? A relationship exploration of sorts. Manga-verse; takes place during Alucard's voyage to London. Alucard/Rip.
    Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Supernatural - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,697 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 54 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 11/21/2009 - Alucard, Rip Van Winkle
    Total Alternate Island by Jason Kreuger Myers reviews
    We all know what happened 1st season, but what if 6 more campers and 4 sibling interns were added to the fray. Couples both fanon and canon. Dedicated to my idols Kobold Necromancer and Winter Rae
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 86 - Words: 396,622 - Reviews: 310 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 2/6/2012 - Published: 5/11/2009 - Complete
    Total Drama Alternate Tour by tigerty reviews
    What if Duncan hadn't quit? What if Ezekiel had a second chance? What if Bridgette didn't get stuck to a pole? It's yet another season 3 rewrite.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 64,437 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 1/1/2012 - Published: 9/19/2010
    Total Drama: OC Parody by Ritzy1 reviews
    Send in Mary and Gary Sues, with no faults whatsoever! Send me your bubbly and popular yet sarcastic and loyal cheerleaders. Send me an exact copy of Duncan, Gwen or Courtney except with different names! The sky is the limit.
    Total Drama series - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 325 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Published: 7/12/2011
    TDWT: Reducks Redux by The Kobold Necromancer reviews
    In this requested redux of TDWT, things are quite different and more insane! Currently in Yukon, where the ship teasing heats up the frozen zone! But how much tease can you take? How much cold can they hold up to? Get ready, because it's sledding time!
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 85,986 - Reviews: 141 - Favs: 90 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 3/23/2011 - Published: 10/5/2010 - Lindsay, Chef Hatchet
    Total Drama Comeback by The Kobold Necromancer reviews
    The original 22 contestants are back on Wawanakwa for another season. Who will win? What new friendships and love interests will form? Can Ezekiel survive, and will Izzy find the jellybean smuggler? Completed, official pairings and more.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 53 - Words: 375,353 - Reviews: 1836 - Favs: 487 - Follows: 149 - Updated: 2/10/2009 - Published: 9/4/2008 - Ezekiel, Izzy - Complete
    Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

    Total Zeksmit Plains reviews
    Alternate Universe not related to the canon series, with small fantasy elements. Ezekiel, after winning a challenge by Chris, uses his money to host a show of his own starring eleven rather familiar girls as they compete in the wild prairies of Zekitunakwa. Day 5: Sleeping with the enemy.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Drama/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 70,323 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 4/13 - Published: 10/3/2011 - Justin, Ezekiel
    Housestuck Hurrcain Crconikals
    Part of the "SBIG" series. It's a stupid, deliberatley badly written thing I made in a spinoff to another also deliberatley badly written fan fic I wrote before. Main plot's about the kids and trolls fighting the Felt, but the majority of the fan fic involves a bunch of sidequests with the citizens. Chapter 17: Victory is so close, and yet so far.
    Homestuck - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 133,622 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/20 - Published: 9/13/2012 - [John E., Jade H.]
    496 Reasons Why Multidating is More Complicated than it Seems reviews
    Basically I took the "make short ficlets of every combination of characters" meme on AO3, set them all in the same story, and added loads of polygamy to it. The eight humans and twenty-four trolls are all stuck on a meteor, and thanks to a certain Most Impurrtant Character they eventually all end up dating eachother.
    Homestuck - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 27,693 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 2/14 - Published: 2/14/2013 - Meulin L.
    Carl Stevens Universe
    Nearly three years after an obnoxious Parody Stu somehow became the leader of Hellsing and got Rip and Seras on his side, the three move to Beach City. Problem is that, unlike London, the Stu isn't so welcomed and soon the Crystal Gems have to do something a little... silly to deal with them. Kind of a huge crack fic...
    Crossover - Hellsing & Steven Universe - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 23,744 - Published: 12/18/2013 - [OC, Rip Van Winkle] Amethyst, Steven U. - Complete
    Gumball Vs Satan reviews
    Part of the "SBIG" series. It's a stupid parody thing that's intentionally badly written. I'd suggest to ignore this if you don't like deliberately badly done fan fiction. Actual story is where the Devil himself has some problems and Elmore Jr. High gets caught up in it, before the story quickly turns into something even more... out-there.
    Amazing World of Gumball - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 7,522 - Reviews: 2 - Published: 10/30/2013 - Gumball W., Darwin W., Carrie, OC
    Movie Day reviews
    The twelve kids race to a distant but popular vacation city in time to see a movie that will only premiere at that city until after three weeks. This fan fic is really more of a test than anything.
    Ed, Edd n Eddy - Rated: K - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,976 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 6/16/2012 - Ed, Eddy
    Hecksing Ulumate Crconikals reviews
    Part of the "SBIG" series. It's a stupid parody of the OVAs/manga before later chapters get more "original." I'd advise to ignore this if you don't like fan fics written bad on purpose. Completed, and my first fan fic to be so.
    Hellsing - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 25,763 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 4/13/2012 - Published: 9/13/2011 - [Seras, Rip Van Winkle, OC] - Complete
    Total Drama World Tour Rewrite reviews
    Remade from the ground up from an older version! My attempt at this. All 24 contestants are competing, with a certain unnexpected someone being the villain. Fans of canon pairings... be cautious.
    Total Drama series - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 2 - Words: 21,377 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 5/13/2011 - Published: 4/1/2011 - Chris M., Chef Hatchet
    The Eds' EDventure reviews
    Part of the "SBIG" series. My really bad Ed Edd n Eddy fan fic. This is bad on purpose. It was made for total fun. Now a bit of an old shame, if you ask me...
    Ed, Edd n Eddy - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 735 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/18/2009 - Eds