Author has written 6 stories for Star Wars, Gallagher Girls, Angel, Believe, and Vampire Diaries.
Star Wars, Chronicles of Narnia, Vampire Diaries, Twilight (a little), Hunger Games (not as much any more), Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Harry Potter, and Alex Rider.
Age- somewhere between 1 and 50
Skip to the end to hear about fanfics. The rest is cute stuff.
I know other people put this on their profiles but I absoulutely love it
Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies)
Keeping A Healthy Level of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3 Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4 .Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. Don't use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, yelling "Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
Boeing 757-"Fragile. Do not drop"
How to store your baby walker: First, remove baby. Wow! Wouldn't have seen that one coming!
Liquid plummer-"Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages."-Beverages WOOO!!
Arm and hammer scoopable cat litter-"safe to use around pets" Are you sure?
Endust duster-"This product is not defined flammable by the consumer products safety commission regulations. However this product can be ignited under certain circumstances"
Baby oil-"Keep out reach of children."
Dog food-"new and improved tasting", who tests it?
Hair coloring-"Do not use as an ice cream topping." Yummy...
Sleeping pills-"Warning: may cause drowsiness" CAuse thats not the desired effect..
Komatsu Floodlight-"This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark" Why did I buy it again?
Earplugs-"These earplugs are nontoxic, but they may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe." Are you sure? Lets experiment .
RCA television remote control-"Not dishwasher safe." Really?
Road sign-"Caution: water on road during rain." Gasp!
Hair dryer-"Do not use while sleeping" But thats the only time I have to work on my hair!
On a bar of Dial soap- "Directions: use like regaular soap" And that would be how?
Some Swann frozen dinners-"Serving sugestion: Defrost" But it's just a sugestion.
Tesco's dessert (printed on bottem of the box)-"Do not turn upside down" To late! you lose!
Marks and Spencer Bread pudding: "Warning: product may be hot after heating." Wow, I would have never guessed!
Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." But wouldn't that save more time?
Boots childrens cough medicine: "Do not drive or operate machinary." We could do alot to reduce construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year old off of fork lifts.
Korean kitchen knife: "Keep out of children." NO dip
Christmas lights; "For indoor and outdoor use only." As opposed to outer space.
Food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." Now I'm curious.
Sainsbury's peanuts:"Warning: may contain nuts." But no peas?
American Airlines package of peanuts; "Instructions: open packet. Eat nuts." Someone got paid big bucks to write this one...
Swidish chainsaw:"Do not attept to stop chainsaw with hands." Raise your hand if you've tried this.
(how do i get that to not be big)
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Hi. This is John:
Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know who you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.
Heaven, God speaking...
Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.
Hello, this is Ron's toaster. Ron's new answering machine is in the shop for repairs, so please leave your message when the toast is done... (Cachunk!)
Job at the FBI
For the final test, the FBI agents took one of
'We must know that you will follow your
Inside the room you will find your wife sitting
The man said, 'You can't be serious. I could
The agent said, 'Then you' re not the right man
The second man was given the same instructions.
The man came out with tears in his eyes, 'I tried,
Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the
'This gun is loaded with blanks' she said. ' I had to Beat him to death with the chair.'
MORAL: WOMEN CAN BE EVIL, Don't Mess with them!!
98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.4.all.the.emo.boyz, WritingRocks6, GlindaFied26, XxXpurplelilyxXx, Bookluvrxoxo, Daydreamer897, The Friendly Chupacabra, Shorty and KG Inc., AVirgoGirl, xcheergrlx3, percyrocksmysoxs, fang321, xx-Wild Child.571-xx, 19sweetgirl96
Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, IwuvMyKenshyPoo, Heidiplease, iNsOmNiAc BiLlIe JoE lOvEr, Black Panther Warrior,bright black stars,BirdsofPrey9832, Josephine18, Torture,Neptunian Diamond, xx-Wild Child.571-xx, 19sweetgirl96
92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.
I'm the kinda girl who gets fired from the M&M factory for throwing out the Ws.
20 Things To Do When You Drive Through A Drive Thru!
1. Drive through the drive-thru in reverse and let your passenger order.
2. Ask the price of almost everything on the menu and then order something that you didn't ask the price for.
3. Tell the employee that your window is broken. Order and then pay with your door open. When the food comes, roll down the window and snatch your order from their hands.
4. Go to McDonald's and demand a big breakfast at 11:30 at night. Put up a fight.
5. Pay for a large order in pennies.
6. Drive in circles around the drive through, ordering just one item of your order each time you pass the window. For added fun, change clothes, hairstyles, glasses and fake beards with each pass.
7. When asked if they can take your order, tell them you are just window-shopping and drive on.
8. Leave a big 4 litre bottle of ketchup on your dashboard. When asked if you would like ketchup with your meal, laugh sadistically for a few seconds, then adopt a serious expression and gesture to the bottle on your dashboard.
9. Ask the cashier how they fit into that little box.
10. Drive up to the window. Then, without saying anything, produce a tape-measure. Measure all aspects of the window, make a note of the measurements in a notebook, then drive off.
11. Demand to speak to the manager. When they come out, complain that you did not like the way the employee said, "May I take your order?"
12. When asked if they can take your order say, "No." Then wind up your window and just sit there staring straight ahead.
13. If they ask you to wait, order anyway and keep doing it till they yell at you.
14. Order 10 large milkshakes. When they arrive, get out of your car, open the bonnet and pour 9 of the milkshakes into the oil filler. Place the remaining milkshake onto the pavement, and stare solemnly at it for three or four minutes with your head bowed. Then drive off. Circle the block for 1 minute, then drive back and do it again.
15. When asked to pay for your order produce a huge bucket of pennies. Attempt to hand the heap of change to the cashier, but 'accidentally' drop it all over the pavement. Spend 10-15 minutes picking it all up, then when you have collected it all, pay by credit card.
16. Attempt to barter for your food. Offer CDs, Cassettes or anything else you have in your car (including friends and family members).
17. Don't order when they come on. Just sit there. If a line forms behind you, get out of the car and cause a scene.
19. Just stare at them when you pay and get your food. Don't break your stare.
20. Honk your horn the whole way through the line.
• Ablutophobia- Fear of washing or bathing
• Aerophobia- Fear of swallowing air
• Anablephobia- Fear of looking up
• Anemophobia- Fear of wind
• Arithmophobia- Fear of numbers
• Auroraphobia- Fear of Northern Lights
• Barophobia- Fear of gravity
• Basophobia- Fear of walking
• Blennophobia- Fear of slime
• Bogyphobia- Fear of the bogeyman
• Cathisophobia- Fear of sitting
• Catoptrophobia- Fear of mirrors
• Chaetophobia- Fear of hair
• Chionophobia- Fear of snow
• Chromatophobia- Fear of colors
• Chronophobia- Fear of time
• Chronomentrophobia- Fear of clocks
• Cibophobia- Fear of food
• Clinophobia- Fear of going to bed
• Dendrophobia- Fear of trees
• Dextrophobia- Fear of objects at the right side of the body
• Eleutherophobia- Fear of freedom
• Eosophobia- Fear of daylight
• Ereuthophobia- Fear of the color red
• Geliophobia- Fear of laughter
• Geniophobia- Fear of chins
• Genuphobia- Fear of knees
• Geumaphobia- Fear of taste
• Heliophobia- Fear of the sun
• Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words
• Homichlophobia- Fear of fog
• Hypnophobia- Fear of sleep
• Ichthyophobia- Fear of fish
• Ideophobia- Fear of ideas
• Kainophobia- Fear of anything new
• Kathisophobia- Fear of sitting down
• Lachanophobia- Fear of vegetables
• Leukophobia- Fear of the color white
• Levophobia- Fear of objects to the left side of the body
• Linonophobia- Fear of string
• Logophobia- Fear of words
• Melanophobia- Fear of the color black
• Melophobia- Fear of music
• Metrophobia- Fear of poetry
• Mnemophobia- Fear of memories
• Octophobia- Fear of the number 8
• Ommetaphobia- Fear of eyes
• Oneirophobia- Fear of dreams
• Ophthalmophobia- Fear of opening one’s eyes
• Ostraconophobia- Fear of shellfish
• Panophobia- Fear of everything
• Papyrophobia- Fear of paper
• Peladophobia- Fear of bald people
• Photophobia- Fear of light
• Phronemophobia- Fear of thinking
• Pogonophobia- Fear of beards
• Sciophobia- Fear of shadows
• Selenophobia- Fear of the moon
• Siderophobia- Fear of stars
• Sitophobia- Fear of food
• Sophophobia- Fear of learning
• Stasibasiphobia- Fear of walking
• Trichopathophobia- Fear of hair
So... unfortnately, I am discontinuing my Star Wars story, A Rebel Fate. I have ideas for it, but not the time to write it. Sorry for new and old readers. I would still love to hear from you about how to improve on writing for old and new writers though. Sorry.
I might occasionally do oneshots for different areas, maybe songfics. They will probaly be in Vampire Diaries, Alex Rider, and Star Wars.
What I read...
I do not read primarily lash stories. I have nothing against those types, but I have zero interest at all in those type of stories. If it's a regular pairing for an actual movie or show then I'll read that as long as they are not the center of the fanfic.
Pairings: All Normals. AnikanxPadme LukexMara HanxLeia JainaxZekk JainaxJagged Fel JacenxTenal Ka I do not support LeiaxLuke they are purely brother and sister
I do not like the whole Padme is alive and goes back to Vader and rules as Empress. There's only so much you can do, but the real Padme would never betray her beliefs like that, even for love. Sorry Vader, but you're on your own.
I like reading the Vader finds Luke and/ or Leia at a young age and raises them, or doesn't. Also I love anything for Vader and Leia father daughter stories... I have read almost every story in the Vader Leia character selection thing. Anything dark, angst, cute and fluffy about Luke and Mara I will read. I like the whole Vader dying and reedeming himselfat the last moment because honestly, I don't think Vader was meant to live unless as to disappear like in One Missed Strike (great fanfics by the way). Also, A great brother sister and vader fanfic is Light of Liberty. I am not trying to advertise, but it is really good.
Pairings: Sometimes Alex and Sabina, depends on the story. I like OC a lot for Alex depending on how well they're written. Lately, I've gotten sick of them.
I love Tom Harris in fanfiction. He is so funny but I feel for him. Especilly in The Best Friends.
Jack/ K Unit!!!
Does he remind anyone else of Xandr Harris in Buffy the Vampire Slayer? They both use their humor in bad situations, but are never at the center of things, just providing support in the backround.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Pairings: BANGEL!!!!!! Its amazing. I only support slight slight slight Spuffy, mostly in passing thought through other fics. I get that it is part of Buffyvese, but Bangel is the real deal. WillowxTara (poor tara) Willow x Oz (sorry oz) not Willow x Kennedy oh and Dawnx Conner (if that counts)
I read mostly Bangel, occasionaly angsty friendship Spike and Buffy (no romance) and Dawn x Conner crossovers with Angel
Pairings: Stelena... not Delena- I understand they have a lot going on right now in season 3, but I know Stefan is in there and still loves her :)
Lately I've started reading more All human Stelena Fics
Also... Jeremyx Bonnie, CarolinexTyler, Alaricx jenna, a little Caroline/ Klaus
I don't read tons, but I like Damon and Elena purely friendships and angsty one shots
Pairings: Peetax Katniss all the way!!!! I've been with the series since the beginning and love Katniss and Peeta
Pairings: All regulars none others
I like friends Harry and Hermione only, usually oneshots.
I've also started reading more Lily/ James AU's and Harry/ Ginny Au's
I read Dudley and Harry oneshots, not slash but about them reconnecting years later...(was anyone else upset that the goodbye from deathly hollows didn't get shown in the movie? I was!)
I havent read Twilight in forever but I like all the normal pairings. i've been with twilight for awhile, and actually didn't see the appeal when it became big, until i realized I had read the book before, but started with eclipse and then breaking dawn. oops!
But I usually like to focus on the Nessie/ jacob stories about them falling in love when she's older, etc.
I also find some fanfics with J Jenks hilarious!
Chronicles of Narnia
I like reading the Lucy/ Edmund not related fics. Also, Edmund or peter or lucy / OC. Alsom the fics when they come back to England and everyone's reactions and them fitting in are good too.
Sara Bareilles, Taylor Swift, Never Shout Never, Marie Digby, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Pink, Goo Goo Dolls, Michelle Branch, Ingrid Michaelson, vampire diaries artists :)... and a lot more
Thats it!!!! I know I am forgetting a lot but oh well. Happy Holidays! You pick which one, you most likely won't be reading this at the same holiday time as me, but there is always a holiday around!