Poll: Who is your favourite Obsidian sibling? Vote Now!
Author has written 5 stories for Final Fantasy VIII.
Hello all, I think you ought to know a little more about me, your humble host. My name is actually Ally Todd, and I don't care what this site says about not using your real name as your pen name. I am a twenty five year old aspiring writer A lot of my writings reflect my experiences growing up in the kind of family where kids have to scrap for attention because I might as well use what I've learnt. At the time of writing this I am currently neck deep in fine tuning my first work which I hope to release on Kindle in the near future. My parents are called Marion and Graeme, although unfortunately my father died of leukaemia when I was thirteen but please no sympathy, I'm over it. I have two delightful siblings, my overachieving twenty two year old brother Euan who I call the Fiendish Nudist (if you've seen his Facebook page you'll know why) and my perpetually bad tempered nineteen year old sister Alicia who I call the Tiny One. I still live at home because I get my meals made and washing done and seeing as the only thing I can cook are ham toasties (mine are the best in the world, final) I'd be an idiot to turn it down.
After several years of exhaustive study, I have concluded that my future lies outside the world of academic achievement. This probably has something to do with my main mental defect. A few years ago I was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome, a form of autism but I've decided it's a part of me and if I don't like it there's bugger all I can do about it. Secondary school was an interesting period in my life as I was permanently self satisfied toe rag who caused mayhem left, right and centre and was in a fight every other day, but in my defence I was just standing up for myself. I dismissed revision as a waste of time and got better exam results than I could've hoped for. I NEVER revised French and still got the highest mark possible for the standard I was at. No idea how that happened. In later years I ran afoul of a Maths teacher who has a professional death wish (he's been booted out of schools all over the place, partly for being a bit handy but mostly for being a tosser) and an English teacher who had some sort of mad grudge against me, to the extent that she consistently marked me down because I used the C word once in her presence some years previously. If I saw either of them in the street and thought I could get away with it...
So what do I do when I'm not writing? Not a lot as it happens. I like to sleep, a lot. I watch TV as well including Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Angel, Firefly, Homeland, Smallville (Kristin Kreuk call me), The Bill, Top Gear and the Big Bang Theory. I listen to a very varied amount of music. My favourite act of all time is Queen, but I also like Taylor Swift and everything in between. Right now I mainly listen to stuff like Green Day, Oasis and the Who. Every now and then I go out with my boyees (Rob, Paul and Sean) for much drinking and debauchery. Word of advice, don't hang out with us if you're overly sensitive. We're always doing something sort of evil to each other. I super glued a drunk and unconscious Sean to a toilet seat but in all fairness he deserved it after what he did to me. Trust me, you don't want to know. That aside, they're alright. I am a sports fan, supporting Glasgow Celtic, Inter Milan and Manchester United in football (soccer to the Yanks out there) and the Denver Broncos in American Football. Speaking of which, am I the only person who though that Bruno Mars looked totally stoned at the half time show when the Broncos lost the Superbowl to the Seahawks?
Things to do in a shop when you are bored.
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the foetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things
Unsafe External Link